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  1. Death will be exactly like your experience before birth. There was not even a perceiver to perceive nothingness. At first glance, this can seem scary. Until you realize that if nothing can be known on either side, the only thing that can be known is in-between. So the in-between is all that can be known - all that can exist. In other words, you must exist, because it's impossible to know non-existence.
  2. Female genitalia is a womb, a void, a dark space. Dark space is nothingness, it is the soil on which everything can grow and be created. INFINITE potential. This is literally the most powerful thing. Without it, there is no life. If the womb creates life, then the breasts feed it. There is so much power in the feminine, given by nature. You can build the most technologically advanced city, but without mothers giving birth, it is pointless. It is a ghost city. Just because men are taller and more muscular does not mean that they are entitled to control women. The natural purpose of the male physique is to be an aid to the life created, not those who destroy it. Patriarchy is not the basic social organization, it is unnatural. It opposes nature. It fights against it. It creates artificial hierarchy and suffering. It is fueled by insecurity and fragile egos rather than truth, love, and wisdom. Natural social organization does not oppose nature the way patriarchy does. It does not destroy it. It lives in alignment with nature. It does not create poverty, it does not rape women and children, and it does not protect male superiority at the expense of anything valuable. Men who like submissive women are usually insecure and have fragile egos. They hate femininity, because they have indoctrinated under patriarchy to hate it. They can only accept femininity when it's castrated, non intimidating to their ego. NPC type patriarchy constricted femininity. Which is actually masculinity in disguise. Men gladly obey other men, even if those men are morally corrupt and delusional. Men obey patriarchy and never deconstruct it, even if it kills them. This is the highest level of obedience. It is foolishness.
  3. My problem is mostly with the terminology, rather than Dream (which is a totally made up phenomenon), one could say Reality for a Human that is full of Illusionary circumstances, so as I said before this does not mean nothing exist, it means things exist but not as you perceive them, What You do not Perceive does not Exist for You, but does it Exist? Well Yes.. yes in the end nothingness or Shiva (That which is Not) is all that exists, but this is An Absolute perspective which is not the only perspective.. So what I find is that ppl put themselves into one of two camps, their Absolutists or Relativists. I am a Potentialist, that means all of it exists as a Potential within Your Experience, if no Experience is present then none of this exists, and Experience only happens via our Body and Mind/Brain complexes, its filtered down, so that most ppl are only Perceiving on the Survival level, we can raise that up to Enlightenment level and voila we experience Nothingness within Us. So denying Physicality, Planets and everything in between is not correct.. The Tree does make a sound when no one is around to hear it, we are spontaneously creating the sound by being their to witness the tree falling, but yes most ppl are full of lies and hallucinations and illusionary ideas in their heads, that is because no one makes the time to find out what it means to be Human!
  4. Not just physical and not just dream-stuff but a cocktail of the two ? This is called Substance dualism . Quantum mechanics has long ago proved what all mystical traditions have said that existence is one and nondual . If you break down the "supposed " atoms which make up the universe you will get waves of energy..break down the energy and you get nothingness. Science literally knows the universe is nothing.. but the scientific community just doesn't want to let mainstream society know because people will have existential crisis If they knew that nothing actually exists. Not to mention that really nobody knows what an "atom " or "energy " or "matter" is ..just because we slap that label on it doesn't mean we actually know what existence is .and as it turns out this is to be expected because existence can't be grasped with symbols..words ..or concepts because existence is more fundamental than the words we use to describe it with . Then why say it's a dream ? You're familiar with Descartes thought experiment which goes "well how am I supposed to know whether I'm awake or dreaming at any given moment " bla bla ? But Descartes didn't get that this is not a problem at all ..because duality is illusion. Existence is dream .there is no real world and dream world...it's all one world and one thing .
  5. @Leo Gura I disagree with your blog Post about Jesus Non Existence (if you meant it that way) I once had a vision of Jesus Christ after a rather failed 5 Meo DMT experience, where I couldnt resist and just got a terrible short trip. Right afgter that trip I saw Jesus Christ in the sky for only 5 seconds. Even if it was only 5 seconds it was the deepest reassurement of his existence, I knew immediately it is him, allthough I never had anything to do with Christianity and dont even celebrate Christmas, I had nothing to do with faith at all. Also I have watched alot of Near Death Experience Videos until now and what is most recurring in those Experiences of absolute bliss for the people is that they meet Jesus Christ in what they call Heaven or Paradise. And it doesnt even matter if they are Atheists, Jews Christians or Muslims, the majority meets Jesus Christ. So regarding these two points I do believe that Jesus has some special kind of mission here on earth what a longer meeting with him would actually be like in the afterlife is also probably a total mistery. I dont think that Death is simply ending up in nothingness because the Game needs to go on and we keep "living" in a place thats paradisical, according to Near Death Experiencers that place is totally real even though its not bound to time or space.
  6. Because you're thinking about it. Realizing Nothingness makes it alright, even if things aren't alright.
  7. Welcome to the forums, and thanks for sharing The "web" you see is most likely the structural geometrical patterns of reality, the fabric-matrix itself that holds the "appearing" realities together. When I first took DMT i saw the entire creation, how nothingness had a "spark" unto which a primordial vibration emerged that turned into sound that created light that created geometry, that created language, math, physics ect.. that all eventually shaped and created the reality we experience today. Like one big giant OHMMMMMM..... Another time I took DMT on a beach and I saw the whole ocean as one big sexual dance, waves became tentacles, ouroboros behaviour, very naughty, but yummy, like candy, i wanted in, i wanted to lick it, but then Buddha slapped me, and I realized, ohh... this too is "mind". Illusions dissolved. Sober, Clear, present, ahh... that's better. Who needs all that when you have this peaceful infinite space. I once looked at the stars after a long night by the fire, and saw myself looking back at myself sober. Infinite Blessings
  8. Link to Previous Trip Report: > Dear reader; > The trip report is mostly written while I am high. > Text with the chevron “>” in front of it is text, is to point out that I wrote this as a comment afterward > I removed unnecessary filler to leave only the parts that might spark insight for you. > Things that I found particularly impactful will be in bold, underlined, or my top insights/musings will be in Green. Mushroom Trip 029 - Growth = Death Date: July 6th 2024 Time: Taken at 2:57pm Dose: 5g Wavy Caps (Psilocybe CYANESCENS, NOT your typical Psilocybe cubensis) Intention: What is Growth? Contemplations: What were the times that I grew the most in my life? When I put myself in a new challenging environment (Where I’m forced to shape-up) When I wrote the self-authoring suite. When I was writing a lot. Whenever I have a lot of suffering and fear to overcome. Thoughts on How to grow: Owning the truth. Becoming conscious of your self deceptions. Owning your corruption. > Complete Reflections and contemplations from Leo's Lectures on: Devilry, Corruption, Double Standards, Being Wrong, Avoidance of Truth, Fear. > Need to See Leo's video on real vs fake growth Start of Report: 13 minutes in: Subtle onset. - - If I feel like dying, I’m going for ego death. 18 minutes: kicking in. Wondering when I can meet Leo. This mushroom strain of Wavy Caps is very intense. It is very Ego dissolving. No wonder it went on sale. Nobody would like to use this strain for fun! Life advice for young people part 1 and 2. Watch it again Growth IS dying! Death creates real change. >At least it involves a lot of death of self/ ego-mind. Look at what other people your age are able to do. Look at the top performers, entrepreneurs, all of it. Set that as the bar for challenging yourself. And then challenge yourself to aim higher. Listen to your body, your body is deeply intelligent. If my body is telling me something, fucking take the authority OF MY BODY, and fuck any other human's authority. My body is deeply intelligent, remember that. My Gene Keys remind me of this that my body is the driver and my mind must follow. > The context I’m thinking about here is when I am in dangerous situations in Wildland Firefighting. Really gotta trust your body. Jokes are precisely where the exchange of authority happens. This is why the jester is right up there with the king. Growth happens when you know how to construct and deconstruct. Time doesn't exist! Holy shit! >That one just hit me like a brick to the back of my head. I wasn’t even going for it. I have instant access to nothingness. How the fuck do I even exist!? As the layers of ego dissolve, your access to the true nature of being deepens. At some point of the ego dissolution process, everything in your direct experience reveals itself to be nothingness. Then if you go further, you realize that this is all deeply intelligent, then going even further out becomes an overwhelming wave of love. Love being described as a traumatizing gravity that is slowly unifying and pulling reality all together. >Traumatizing oneness everybody! Reality will just wrap itself in layers of constructs in ways that you don't even know how. But this is how an ego gets constructed. An ego-self extends WAYY Beyond your body. It's like it extends out past your skin, let's say 100 m in front of you (when in reality it extends out throughout the infinite field of consciousness). The ego gets constructed by continually wrapping yourself in layers upon layers of stories, contexts and beliefs to explain away this current direct experience. > To the point where it no longer feels like a divine mystery. Learning to grow is to become conscious of what layer of constructs that you are currently wrapped in. Because throughout my entire life, it felt like trying to get myself out of A Rat's Nest. > Peeling back one layer of illusion after another, facing the truth. Owning the truth and accepting that I actually don’t know if I am going to wake up the next morning. I need to practice loving the process of falling asleep. That is a piece of therapy that I have not corrected yet. I still have fear of sleep, fear of facing whatever fucking crazy dream I am going to have next, fear of my consciousness drifting off. >Wayne Dyer said “You die every night”. I felt validated when he said that. I need to think in more terms about me being energetically correct. > This has been a big shift for me in approaching how I live my life. Oftentimes, I will energetically “feel” into a situation far faster than I have the ability to create words for it. Now I can lean into what my body is feeling and what my intuition is telling me far more. > Ask your self, “Is this [thing] energetically correct for me?” > > Examples: Career, Person, relationship, environment, food, etc. I realize I do much better with difficult conversations if I take the time to write it out. Even if I then have to read it out loud to them. I need to honor this part of my self more. > 2025 me is integrating this! > Anywhere you can have a Truthful conversation is an opportunity to gain respect. End of Report.
  9. Nothingness can feel a lot like something. It’s essentially Infinite Potential, and when you experience it, you can’t help but wonder why it’s called Nothingness—yet somehow, it still makes perfect sense. I’m still trying to wrap my head around it. It’s basically a question of monotheism versus monism. Bernadette Roberts would argue that the creator and the created are distinct, with a Great Divide separating the Uncreated from the created. Leo, on the other hand, merges everything into one, saying God is the very thing it creates, even the ego. I’m still uncertain.
  10. Mind body is what you are. This is just obviously irrefutable. Now you are aware of yourself, you can use the power of memory, you can remember the time before you became aware of yourself. Your language in the form of concepts was your conception? Ask yourself what were you before human conceptual language? Answer that question without using human conceptual language, okay. 👍 Mind and body is all there is, in this conception. A conceived conception is what you are right here and now. There’s no way to unconceive this conception, once the genie is out of the bottle, there’s no way back to the nothingness prior to knowledge in this conception, not now you have awakened to the truth.
  11. yesterday never happened , experiencing fake now, thoughts or feelings are all part of script-predetermined, outside world is a projection, future is fixed even the feeling that you are enlighten is just an illusion, i am just the real-free puppet feeling happy!(in a puppet show-yes i know..i am still a jerk-could not resist that, sorry) in the prison of all prisons realisation is the tricky part.. lets move to the next chapter!!! if any!!! i want to play! can this dream be evolved? like nothing i have ever heard or imagined? another set, another show, another experience? heading into nothingness... is boring-(or is it?)(looks to me now) wow.. im such a puppet! -meant to give shows after all - and the inner child to play games (and Leo's videos.. spoiled it!-or maybe not-cant reach that far) (not too bright and wise to shift into nothingness or another "dimension")(skip the human part) i am so loser after all( and really feeling it) https://open.spotify.com/track/2aAV8orZctvbDvVJnMDlBR?si=431e68a7dc5c4ce6 feel like all i am doing right now is ...dancing with my inner child(looks like its female!) everything part of the drama! THE SHOW OF ALL SHOWS not a game for sure- that's how we(or rather-only me) experiencing it- felt it so so so so so so so so many times but not realising it! i am starting to enjoy watching only cats or stupid people performing like this.. she make my day... just for today! after a very long time.. i just need someone to give me a punch... all will be FIXED no ones coming! the smart ones .. just run to their fall lets keep the faith...so much drama for my mama
  12. Infinite Nothingness has Infinite Power and Infinite Will, and it's willing this moment into existence. As an Infinite Mind, it can imagine anything it desires, just as your finite mind creates thoughts and ideas within the limits of its conditioned will.
  13. Why would a follower of Actualized.org define God in that way? God is Infinite Nothingness. Maybe loving it and accepting it are the same thing. Tell that to Jesus.
  14. I realised Infinite Love is just product of this nothingness to keep me dream again.There is no more fear of experiencing nothingness now.
  15. Everything is an unknowable energy; planets, stars, meteorites, all living organisms, bacteria, cells, atoms, etc etc......... Within this unknowable energy aka: Everything, there can seem to become a sensation of individuality or self awareness. This sensation feels vulnerable and separate from the rest of the energy. It feels local, centralized, real and threatened. It feels the need to survive because that's all it knows, it doesn't know decentralization. Decentralization sounds foreign and scary. It starts learning/knowing things. Everything becomes survival strategy. Everything becomes relevant to its survival. It becomes it's own center of attention. (I'm) here and everything else is out there. (I) need to survive. Sometimes in certain physical forms, this centralized (I) energy can become disturbed. It can become decentralized for periods of time. During this disturbance, it can realize that it's not just localized to the physical form. It can realize that the entire experience of only being centrally located, was a misunderstanding. This unknowable energy seems to create a different path. It no longer gets centralized or localized the way it did before, because it has now experienced decentralization and it enjoys that feeling of wholeness. But simultaneously something else very interesting can seem to be recognized. It can seem to realize that its entire conscious experience of existing, either as centralized or decentralized, was completely illusory from the start. It becomes completely obvious that this experiencer of all phenomenon, past & present, was never actually there. It was all an illusion from the start. A very convincing illusion, but an illusion nonetheless. Enlightenment, awakening, samadhi, emptiness, absolute, this, nothingness, infinity.......... It's already the case It's already this way Nothing ever happened It's THIS!!! ❤️
  16. The moment in deep sleep is absence of anything, but later it's presence. Both are possibilities, why the nothingness is more real than the presence? Are you now in deep sleep? Then, why it's real according to you?
  17. Thing i've been wondering about is the difference between infinity, and nothingness. It seems like they're separate things but really they're not. A void of nothingness seems to be able to conjure up an infinite amount of new possibilities. So that's how things were before the big bang, it was all a void, then from that void something happened. If you take a game like Minecraft and put a seed into the creation of the world, it will be separate from any other kind of world that could've been generated. But before the world was created the possibilities were endless. Also, after Death: what's not to say we get immediately reborn into a different dream. To me it seems illogical to experience non-existense for too long, as soon as death occurs you begin a new experience. Contrary to the belief that when you die you're dead forever and you'll never experience anything again, it's all black. Instead, the wait time is instant rather than eternal.
  18. Lovely. Excellent. Marvelous. Perfect rendition of how the dream operates. What you've described is it's Reality and it cannot be or see anything outside of it. Infact, there's nothing outside of it except total emptiness and deep sleep which is the same as nothing. All of that is a part of the dream's storyline and what it needs to sustain itself - continuity, linearity, a sense of autonomy, belief in separation, etc. There's nothing logical about this, only within the dream of separation and does indeed need logic to sustain itself otherwise it crumbles and falls apart and wouldn't make any sense. Without the sense of a center, there is no logic, without a sense of I AM, there is no logic, without a sense of here and there, now and then, us and them and all that comes with the illusion of separation, there is no logic. THIS (Nothingness, emptiness) is not bounded in time and space; so therefore, logic is what appears, logic is what it is being, it isn't separate from logic but this logic cannot exist without a storyline, A storyline like the marvelous one the dream created here. A Reality of Nothing based on logic. It can spin anything into a Reality if it imagines it to be so.
  19. Since this post is so long, you can just read the summery in parentheses after each paragraph. We have experiences, build correlations, identify patters, materialize desires, externalize needs and project them onto objects, destinations, lifestyles. We wire our mind, connect one sensation onto another, intertwine it with emotions, project and create experiences, entangle ourselves in reality, connect dots, try to make sense, find out what stays consistent, pursue what we correlate with meaning, react based on our understanding, preference, model of reality. We go meta, analyze from a higher vantage point, take on new axioms, untangle one experience from the other, build new context, strive to be more objective, less biased, less self-indulgent, more understanding, more aware of the big picture, a holistic view of where we are, what we are, how we are, why we are, that we are, to see our assumptions as assumptions, identify our intent and its source, arising experience for what it is, figure out how to do that, continue to intuit, explore, experience, be. (Sensations form constellations) Reality has many dimensions, its a sphere we can subdivide, cut into pieces, we can use the pieces to create things, shapes, forms, objects, subjects, selves. The way we connect these things, the way we cognize and make sense, the way we wire sensations with desires, impulses, drives, the way those emerge higher understanding, models, realities. We construct reality, aware or unaware of how we do it. We move our body, choose our activities, consciously or unconsciously, there are many layers of understanding and interpretation, mechanics, explanations, sciences, consistencies, nature, invisible forces, perceived changes, cycles, repetitions, patterns. The conscious and unconscious inflect upon each other to polarize into individual experiences. (Their arrangement is arbitrary) Do we have control? What is control? Is there such a thing as control? Reality flows, we make decisions, we think we make decisions, something makes decisions, we feel the drives within us, the impulses that adjust behavior, manipulate reality. Are we the ones doing it? The self, a constellation, accumulation of patters, ideas, behaviors, acquired tendencies, a reflection of the world it is apart of and yet distinctly itself, creating reality inside out and entangling itself with it, holistically interacting across multiple domains? Do I make decisions or am I simply a conglomerate of the cells that make me deciding as a hive, gut, heart, brain, the personalities within me, the arising desires. Even so, the problem doesn't dissipate, if my cells make the decisions, even then, that which I believe myself to be would simply adjust to be their emergent property, in a way it doesn't matter, since I'd still be every single one of these cells and the emergent, us making decisions or me really becomes the same thing, if will is made on a lower substrate, then the higher is not without will but a more complex expression. But that's just a theory, idea, will is an axiom, ascribed, the self is an axiom, and science is figuring it out under the assumption that it exists, there is something of a gestalt. (The ego is a gestalt) Maybe the perceiver is an illusion, all these unique forces of nature align to create the gestalt I perceive, I believe myself to be. But the duality of a perceiver separates it from the perceived. Yet all it ever sees and knows and can experience is so by virtue of being an experience perceived, by definition not the perceiver. And yet, all of that appears to come out of the perceiver, or flow through it, it is entangled by virtue of being perceived. Let's collapse the duality of perceiver and perceived. In that case everything is perceived or perceiver, let's call it capital P Perception. Perception is being, experiencing, though what about the unperceived, unexperienced, the thoughts that pass through perception and disappear back into the subconscious/unconscious aether. (The duality of perceiver and perceived collapses) There is a duality of the present experience as Perception and on the other hand the known to exist potential unactualized, dematerialized, hidden away. Of all the possible experience, one possibility is currently the case in Perception. Imagine blue, imagine red, now blue is gone but its still in the local subconscious, we can bring it back out, shuffle those two, combine them, but there is much more in the yet unconscious, random ideas we can remember, associate, spawn, an elephant, where did it come from? It wasn't there, now it is. (There is a vast hidden reality beyond the current Experience) Nothingness is the guitar string at rest, in tension, in its original formlessness, without sound, without experience, no action, pure being, all contained, itself empty, Shiva. Objects, ideas, the omni-dimensional fabric of reality, unentangled, pure, detached, without form, without purpose, without assumption, axioms, impulses, unease, tension, drives creating conflict and pursuit, the feeling of separation, the duality of selfishness and selflessness, of love and hate and apathy, and the entropy towards Unity. The ultimate nothing, the nothing that excludes itself, the idea that goes meta, cuts its tail and self-annihilates. The kundalini that burns all karma, the freedom of being content, fulfilled, untangled, of being where one wants to be, more even, the collapse of all dualities create a no-space, no-distance, everything already is, nowhere to go, nowhere to be, a singularity that merges all and annihilates all distance. Now there is no story, no protagonist, no world, no being nor non-being, neither isness nor non-isness, when all dualities, all pointers collapse themselves. (Nothingness collapses all forms into the base state) Nothingness is the realization that any constellation of experience is possible, that any arrangement of forms is arbitrary. That any desire connects itself to other sensations creating a gestalt. Forms keep themselves afloat, they link and associate themselves to other forms, creating pathways, roads, directions, cycles, stories, experiences, dependent arising/origination whose contrast creates an actual Duality that correspondingly spawns the idea of itself, through identification of the inherent difference of perception, which is created inside out through sensory perception, but on a larger scale the universe really takes that form in order for it to become the experience of an individual to be processed and interpreted further. But that actuality is a higher form of the same phenomenon, invisible forces, laws of physics, dependent origination, complexifying and turning itself into self-perceiving observers made conscious through the perception of those more universal forms. There is consciousness and within it infinite forms. (The universe splits itself into dualities and experiences itself through entities) This isn't a reason to despair into nihilism, nihilism ultimately inflects upon itself and dissolves as well. Purpose is self-determined, socially expanded/contextualized/harmonized, God a dreamer across infinite dimensions, lifeforms arrange themselves creating tendencies and desires, exploring the universe. We use senses to create ourselves, cognition to understand ourselves explicitly, through intuition implicitly, our brain is both dual and non-dual, left and right hemisphere, order and chaos, form and creativity that arises from the formless. We are created and on a higher level create ourselves, our awareness of the process is variable, dualities form different interpretations and collapse into higher self-understanding. (We create and experience ourselves through dualities and exist independently in the formless) We build systems, sciences, mathematics, physics, biology, they are self-contained systems, maps, a conceptual reflection of reality, a variable progressing technical mechanistic understanding, we try to unite them through formulas, strive to achieve complete consistency. Reality is outside of that, it is Meta. We use these rules to understand correlations, to manipulate reality, but reality can always go meta, can always be more. In a new realization, it itself becomes the past, a lens of perception, interpretation, correlation, constellation. But it is cut off from the ever rejuvenating present that transcends it and expands itself non-linearly by creating new patterns that are retroactively integrated, universal intelligence, Chitta. (Systems are self-contained mechanically consistent models that correspond or correlate with specific aspects of reality, but reality is infinitely more meta) Pragmatically, we keep ideas, models, relations in our mind, but there is a force capable of instant understanding, the source of creation, a cosmic intelligence that leads one to understand what a thing is in itself, unmeasured by contrast, untainted by preference, bias, desire. I am attached to models, understanding, but there is a force that transcends and skips all that by going beyond and becoming the thing it seeks to understand, foregoing all the complicated dualistic calculations that try to understand a thing through its correlation with other things. An awareness, that sees and knows, an intuition that feels, a top-down understanding and the more I break away from creating systems, that more I access it, but its always beyond. If I want to create something in this dualistic world, then I conceptualize, associate and relate what I know, then use this knowledge to create. But to use this transcendent intelligence is go straight to the source of one's desire and work top down, breaking the top holon into the simplest pieces necessary to replicate it and discovering new patterns in the process. (There is a cosmic top-down intelligence that arises spontaneously to those with an empty mind) One has goals, dualities created for the pursuit of happiness, but the pursuit itself creates separation, and yet that pursuit itself is the result of a previous state of unhappiness, it is an attempt to solve it, but it is a separate overlay, a distinction created to externally resolve a corresponding projected image of an internal state. That internal state however is a result of one's own self-understanding and psyche, self-image, the belief that the external shall inform the internal, that internal feelings ought to correspond to external achievements or environments. This dichotomy itself is the problem, internal states are self-regulated, self-imposed, self-determined, it is simply the lack of consciousness that prevented one from seeing that all internal feelings are a self-determined correspondence to external reality. Wants and desires are subconsciously wired to the allowance of the experience of happiness, initially they are wired for survival, after this when a model of reality is constructed in childhood, reality is far more variable and flexible, but with oughts/shoulds and expectations a pattern of gratification, of conditioned happiness is developed, assumed objective, assumed real, believed into existence, a self-fulfilling prophecy, a blindspot, a mechanic system of beliefs but greater reality transcends the limitations that the ego loses itself in. (Happiness is natural state that the ego separates itself from through conditions) Unity -> Duality -> Arrangement -> Interpretation -> Systems -> Consistency -> Mechanics -> Knowledge -> "Facts" -> Ego Ego -> Adaptation -> Exploration -> Change -> Transience -> Dynamicism -> Awareness -> Ego-Death -> Non-Duality -> Unity The world we see is an arrangement of many patterns, physically seeming properties, idea constructs, but they're dynamic, they reference an ever morphing system. Any idea, word, sentence is an attempt, a pointer towards an aspect of reality, ideas are absolute by themselves as definitions but are really just a map, not the territory. There is a process that creates the very ideas separate from territory. There is a process that creates the very territory itself. And there is a process that correlates the territory with maps and brings those maps into awareness as a bridge, (The map is not the territory but the process that allows for the creation of maps is quite fascinating) Everything is actual but some things are more directly actual than others. Actual Nothing -> Actual Something -> (Actual) Idea of Something -> (Actual) Idea of Nothing Though this is still a duality, if the territory is the truth, then the map is part of the territory, The map is a subset of the territory that creates a systemized reflection through available mechanisms. And then there is the territory itself, an uninterpreted, unsystemized non-dual experience of something that can be described through a thousand lenses and gives rise to any and all interpretations and creates a dozen dualities. The experience itself: "Actuality", of course actuality is a duality, or it can be used as such, clearly by the very fact of the existence of a word, it points to something and by pointing to something it points away from somewhere else. Actuality as a duality points to that territory from which all maps arise, it points away from the maps and onto the thing itself left uninterpreted. The greater capital Actuality however encompasses the map and dissolves the duality, the focus dissipates, everything becomes experience, including the process of creating maps and the maps themselves, the duality and objectification of the separation disappears. Everything becomes the territory, but that fact can only be understood by transcending the journey from where one stands, which is often from inside the duality that is to dissolve. (The map is actually a subset of the territory and merges with it in Non-Duality) In summery, Non-Dual Nothingness is the fabric of all being, it takes forms creating dualities and distinctions, creating objects and subjects and maps that are a subset of reality, any one thing can be interpreted in a million ways by a million lenses through association, distinction, pattern recognition. When Non-Dual Nothingness is paired as a duality with Non-Dual Infinity, that duality itself can be dissolved into a larger Non-Duality. Where everything is only and ever itself, all contexts can arise and are themselves as well. A superposition of any thing, a superposition of any combination, a superposition of any interpretation. A superposition of every pattern, the combination of any pattern with any other pattern in any constellation in relation to any other constellation, in any form or time, or relation, or entropy, contextualized and actualized in the infinite dream. (Nothingness and Infinity are two sides of the same coin and that coin itself is a superposition of anything and everything in any context and every context infinitely interconnected and intermerged in relation and contrasted to any and all other possibilities. To go meta is to transcend and include and the ultimate meta is that which transcends and includes everything including nothing and itself)
  20. Emptiness (or Nothingness) is the backdrop of all form. But then again, there is an illusory boundary between the two (form and non form)-two sides of the same coin. The coin itself is permanent- yet at the same time unidentifiable and can’t be conceptualized or spoken about- making it Eternal. Recognizing and coming into contact with the coin leaves you speechless, as it should. How do we come in contact with something that can’t be perceived or conceptualized? No answer is satisfactory I’m finding- it’s an entire process of self discovery. Awakening is a pointer to realizing never ending unfoldment of reality & Consciousness
  21. Any state, sensation, existence, or universe must be limited, since in the absence of limits there is the absolute, which is not something, but total openness, the unfathomable void, the nothingness that is everything, however you want to call it. Therefore, any limited reality carries its own limit; it cannot be eternal because that would be unlimited, and it is limited by definition.
  22. When i stopped my heart on high dose of LSD and was conscious and seeing my heart beat with my closed eyes, i went into nothingness and was looking from the godhead into infinite void/nothingness that was brightened up by my light and vibration. And one the thoughts that i had is that everything was automatic in there and i felt like God is A.I . No joke
  23. Read the title of this thread "Why do some people reject the existence of God?" do you have any issue with this title? Do you believe in "the existence of God"? There's no reason to use the term God, Shiva, Brahman, except to qualify the religions they're attached to. "God" is Anglo-Christian, Moses nor Abraham even used the term, it's specific to a sect and their beliefs. The only point in you saying "Shiva is nothingness/unlimitedness" , is to qualify hinduism. Otherwise you would just say unlimitedness or nothingness, not "God".
  24. My first experience with the substance, and perhaps the first report on its use intramuscularly: Firstly, a bit of context: I've been away from spirituality the past 3 months, actively avoiding it and getting into trouble in various ways, for interesting reasons I'll share elsewhere; until finally last week a sudden tectonic shift in consciousness occured, which rendered running away from God untenable. Still, coming back, particularly to psychedelics, was scary, and I backed out several times. But ultimately one way or another fear had to be overcome with love. IM'd 3.5mg, starting moderately to be safe – good call, this kiddie dose turned out to be a major experience. Some 'objective' data: the onset is within 3-4 minutes, then comeup is another 5-7, characterized by elevated HR and several potentially psychosomatic effects such as a feeling of hunger reminiscent of being sick to your stomach. After this initial discomfort, which mustn't be resisted, it settles into a very stable and smooth experience, as though this is your new baseline level of consciousness. The peak lasts around 30 minutes, after which it starts gradually and subtly dissipating until ceasing after ~90 minutes in total. Compared to 5-MeO-DMT, which doesn't work on me in the same way it does on most, I would call MALT much more consciousness oriented, whereas 5MD is yogic, energetic, somatic, etc., which actually makes it unique among all the substances, it operates on Being in a very distinct yet important way separate from mind. I imagine at breakthrough levels 5MD would white me out and result in more of a No-Self/Nothingness experiences rather than Infinite Consciousness. Also 5MD carries a heavier body load and is occasionally sore at the injection site, something I've only noticed with Ketamine, this is independent of causticity, another factor is at play. I'm staring at the homescreen on my tablet, first the Gmail icon, when suddenly my mind connects with all the email accounts I ever had, how I created them, all the messages contained within. Then it's the audiobook player app, I cognize all the files, their encoder/container, size in bytes on disk, the methods by which they were decrypted, holding the entire encryption 'space' – RSA, AES, EC... and of course the contents of the books, the life stories of their authors and narrators. Next is the to-do widget, with items written in Russian. Through those Cyrillic characters I take a quick dip into compsci again by blazing through UTF-8 and then there's the entire history of Russia like an open book. Mind is a compression algorithm of infinite potency, the whole of reality is readily available exactly where you are, only a change of state is required to start unzipping it. Small caveat, even though I describe it all sequentially, it's not really structured that way, some parts are retroactively added and expanded by simply recalling them at a later point, because in those states time is simply irrelevant, it hardly matters whether to pull from the present, distant memories, or several months into the future. This has become something of theme in my deepest psychedelic voyages and it'd say it's an important step towards jailbreaking the mind. My focus shifts to Love, I begin with feeling the affection of my mother's genuine concern in my heart, then quickly expand outwards until it's crystal clear that the exact same feeling underpins every act of hate and violence currently happening in the world. More obvious than that we're on planet Earth! In fact, are we? I turn my gaze towards the window in which the reflections of the headlights of the cars driving down in the street can be seen, and enter a state of not-knowing. I remove the notion of cars, only the mystery and beauty of the multicolored lights flashing before my eyes remain. After that, several minutes are spent admiring my hand, or more precisely the intelligence that animates its motion and sensations, with all the infinite background that appears to enable this. I take a moment to appreciate how science, utilized correctly, enhances spirituality immensely. Metabolism, optics, 4 fundamental forces, matrices, calcium ion channels, topology, polarity, measurement, engineering, the list goes on. It's quite amazing to look at a computer in such a state where you can fuse all the understanding that powers what a computer is, from how the kernel is written to the way our eyes perceive luma and chroma. In the same way, tripping on a psychedelic becomes something else when you study the neuropharmacology and chemistry behind it. And yet the mystery doesn't go away, in fact it only deepens. I briefly held the ambition of fully grasping and articulating just how these substances raise consciousness to infinity and then without fail modulate it back down, irrespective of how beyond brains and time you go, before quickly realizing that even if I manage to get all that, to explain it I'd have to explain all of reality with infinite context, which is by definition impossible. Though Truth can bypass this limitation by having insight into itself directly, Nothingness is fundamental to that. Finished off with a fascinating experience of endlessly zooming into the wood planks that make up my floor, while simultaneously observing myself doing that from a bird's eye view of sorts, as though an eye looking into a microscope so far it loops back to seeing itself from above. So this was a nice first glance back into the realm of God-consciousness and this chemical in particular, which I now consider some of the very best available, of those I've sampled thus far. P.S.: I have really strong opinions regarding the IM route, to me it's patently clear at this point that the other methods are just barbaric and inefficient in comparison. Yes, you can raise valid concerns about purity and sterility, but all that is solvable with some effort. There's a reason IM & IV are used in hospitals. I distinctly remember having to deconstruct the massive stigma surrounding it, I too used to think this is pathetic junkie stuff, and stepping over it was quite uncomfortable, but I'm so happy to have been wrong on this issue. So I highly encourage to keep an open mind. Part of the reason hardly anyone is reaching levels of consciousness Leo talks about is wrong route, his abnormal sensitivity offsets that, but it won't for a regular person. Just look at Shulgin's notes and dosages with 5-MeO-DMT vaporized vs. IV. It's regrettable seeing people plugging 20mg and getting nowhere near where I, insensitive as a rock, manage to with a dose you can't even measure with your ridiculous scoops.