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Funny, I just shared this beautiful Bentinho talk on another actualized forum: I've followed Bentinho the last 6 or 7 years, have done some of his events, his free trinfinity academy, online workshops, and having met and talked to him personally. He feels like a brother from another dimension to me. And similar to how I resonate with Leo's perspective and work I have also observed many similarities in how this generation of current spiritual teachers are being perceived, portrayed and judged by the masses on social media which are clearly not yet capable of understanding or opening up to this higher level of consciousness. For example Bentinho's inner circle of like minded individuals at some point, a few years ago, was infiltrated by a self proclaimed journalist type with a very negative intention to expose Bentinho as a dangerous cult leader. That individual wrote a very judging and opinionated article (on medium) in which a lot of his spiritual teachings were taken out of proper context and mixed with many accusations from a very low level fear based consciousness perspective, framing him to be some kind of suicide encouraging monster and dangerous cult leader. To the level that when the article was published the local community of the city of Boulder became so much influenced by the fear the article triggered that Bentinho and his inner circle and following had to actually move away from that area because they weren't welcome there anymore. In one of his videos Bentinho explained that he was even visited by the police because they were seriously investigating a suicide of one of his students and were trying to determine if he had perhaps encouraged people to commit suicide in his talks. I mention this story In light of the recent events with the suicide of one of Leo's forum members and the very large youtube following Leo currently has statistically. Because of my own spiritual growth and experience as a local spiritual coach / teacher in my city and country I am aware of how powerfully this level of higher consciousness can inspire awakening, accelerate inner growth and expand our understanding of reality. But I also notice how relative and even limiting some of the social media or platforms used in combination with this type of philosophical and spiritual information in teaching higher consciousness can be. Bentinho himself once said something like: "A true master is not the one with the greatest amount of followers, but rather the one who creates the most masters." Which points to the how the actual evolution of consciousness naturally unfolds, as a process that our daily lives already catalyse, because we are the creators of our reality, whether or not we are personally awake to that absolute realisation. Everything is a reflection of our inner state of being and when we are honestly ready and asking for expansion we will naturally create, attract or resonate with the information and all the different ways that would currently contribute to the realisation of our inner desire to grow spiritually. Although I very much appreciate and admire both Leo's and Bentinho's ambition, inspiration, dedication, eloquence and body of work, I also notice that some aspects of this form of teaching, with youtube video's and social media expressions, are not always very effective ultimately. In essence every tool, ritual, approach, philosophy, object, inspirational video etc simply functions as and can be embraced as a permission slip to allow yourself to match a specific preferred frequency of being, to resonate with and become the parallel reality version of yourself that you aspire. Listen to this explanation by Bashar about the concept of how 'permission slips' work in our consciousness: The main similarity and theme I notice in how the teachings of Leo and Bentinho are expressed and interpreted is the cognitive, mental and spiritual understanding and eloquence in explaining very abstract concepts about consciousness and the nature of reality from that higher perspective, just as how this enlightened wisdom has been communicated in many books throughout our close past history. (the Seth Material, the Ra Material, Bashar etc) But this level of clear communication does not automatically mean that the consumers or audience who listens to, reads or views these transmissions will be able to comprehend or integrate as knowing what is being transmitted. Just as how someone might have peak experiences of divinity or enlightenment using psychedelics as a permission slip, but also having to deal with the contrast of those expanded perspectives in relationship to daily life experience. One obvious benefit of our current technological capabilities is that these teachers are now able to easily create beautiful databases of thematic information, but as a side effect these forms may also encourage many to become even more lazy by only following and mentally consuming the information without having the support or dedication to actually explore, experiment with and integrate the wisdom that is being communicated in daily life embodiment. That is why I still wish to focus my attention mostly on interacting and meditating with people who are at least open to apply what is being offered as invitation and might benefit from the individual attention in their growth. What I mean by this is that it could be equally valid, effective and valuable to interact with for example only 2 people or students in a certain amount of time as with for example 2 million followers, from the point of view of contributing to the expansion of human consciousness. All that we as spiritual teachers are able to do is offer others the loving invitation, mental clarity and intuitive inspiration to expand one's own understanding by being a reflection, an open door to and a shining example of higher divine consciousness. Relevant to this theme I recommend this series by Bentinho on how to inspire change (session 1 - 2): https://www.youtube.com/c/BentinhoMassaro/search?query=how to inspire change And this 4 part series about the fall & rise of our civilization: https://www.youtube.com/c/BentinhoMassaro/search?query=fall rise civilization Another example of Bentinho's work is this exploration and visualisation of the topic of death: Overall I think that there is currently way more desire for individual and small group type tailored education and interaction than there is for more spiritual information being put out on this relative mental plane. And I would encourage everyone who feels inspired to contribute to our collective spiritual evolution to initiate their own local gatherings or meditation groups in order to support each other in this way. Having teachers like Leo, Bentinho, Bashar and many others providing us with comprehensive background information and next level teachings to draw upon, I feel we are invited to help each other in step by step applying and integrating much of this wisdom in our present reality experience. Individual or collective spiritual awakening, enlightenment and empowerment cannot be forced, but can be effectively invited, activated and catalysed with our loving attitude, time and energy. Leo and Bentinho beautifully play their parts , their specific roles in this endeavour, how do you wish to contribute in your own unique way?

Speak for yourself. Plus, he lives in Sweden ? Over a decade ago I had a skilled therapist help me after a suicide attempt. She was fabulous. Therapist are like anything though there are good ones and not so good ones. If you come across one not working for you, try another. Giving up and not talking to a professional when you are seriously depressed/anxious shouldn't be an exceptable option.

@mp22 There is no contradiction at all. You simply haven't yet understood what "meaninglessness" actually is and how deep it really goes. If you think that meaninglessness is a problem and that therefore now you should end your life, you haven't understood. What happens, when truly everything becomes meaningless? Well, obviously the fact that everything is meaningless becomes meaningless too. And in that way, meaninglessness flips inside out - the moment you realize what 100% meaninglessness is, man.. That's liberation. That's a true gift. And you say "thank god this is just an illusion!" But you see, the illusion is real. If you think that "illusion" is a bad word, you also don't understand what is meant by saying "the universe is an illusion". Please be careful. Because it seems to me that you have adopted some of the things Leo or someone else said as a philosophy and then turned it into a prescription for what to do. But that's not how it works. Be very, very careful with rationalizing ideas like meaninglessness or suicide. It can develop into some seriously nasty problems.

About Recent Events in The Community I want to share some thoughts about Leo, Actualized.org, and the recent suicide of a member of this forum. About Leo, his Rhetoric, and Empathy The first time that I discovered actualized.org I was blown away by how much I resonated with Leo. It was the first time that I resonated that much with someone. I resonated with everything: the ideas, the way he articulates things, the arrogance, etc. I thought: "Finally a no BS guy. Finally someone who cares about the truth, who is willing to dive deep, and who says things how they are even if people don't like it". I especially liked the direct and blunt approach on some videos. It was for the videos from 2014 to 2017, the style has evolved since then. He was like my clone. When you discover someone that is basically your clone you become a bit obsessed with him, but also at the same time this person reveals flaws that are most of the time very difficult to acknowledge without having an outside look on yourself. I only met a few individuals like this in my life and Leo is one of them. With some introspection this year I became aware of another reason why I resonated so much with Leo: he talks like my dad used to talk to me (especially on the forum). I have been annoyed most of my life by how emotional people would get when I would be radically honest and say radical trues. People always looked so dumb to me that I avoided most of them to focus only on me which resulted in me not having any friends, being socially awkward, and not caring about what I would say. The reason why I didn't care at all about the words that I would use with people was that I've been talked down so much that I became emotionally numb to abusive language, especially during late middle school, high school. It caused me an inability to use language properly with people because I would just say what I got. It would cause frictions in social relationships and because of that, I would isolate (they were also other reasons, not only the language but just the fact that I never highly resonated with most people around stage blue/orange). However, I would still live in a society and at one point I would have to interact with a group. When it happened, I started to have so many emotional reactions against my blunt rhetoric (and not only that but just the tone of my voice. I noticed that people are actually more reactive to the tone than the language itself because the tone reflects how we feel and people want to be around people who feel good) that I started to understand that something was wrong. Yes, I lacked empathy many times in my life, I saw people as dumb, irresponsible, and incompetent exactly like Leo. I saw words like "Please" and "Thank you" as useless, I saw kindness as a weakness because I was overly logical and lacked love. I've put myself on a pedestal, but at the same time, I was sad because nobody would relate to me. If these painful relationships and strong emotional reactions against my language helped me in some way is to become more authentic and to bring back the empathy that I lost after being so much verbally abused. I became aware that most people aren't overly logical and cannot handle directness, but I also became aware that I lost a part of myself a long time ago. I remember being hypersensitive as a kid and crying more easily than other boys, I then lost this hypersensitivity because it was too overwhelming and choose to repress emotions, I'm now connecting back to this hypersensitivity and expressing emotions again. What helped me in bringing back empathy to my life was to remind myself of being talked down to and of being disrespected, and to feel the pain that I felt and at the same time to feel the pain that others feel. I think that empathy needs to be more cultivated on this forum. Many times we don't realize when we are in pain and we don't know that we cause our own pain. Many times we are stuck in strange loops of our bodies and our minds. If you highly resonate with Leo, I'm suggesting you to analyze the relationship that you have with him. This relationship might be a bit more traumatic than you think it is. About Actualized.org Spiral Development There has been a huge evolution of Actualized.org level of consciousness. It started with stage Orange and progressively moved to Green, Yellow, and now Turquoise. However, even if the material is very advanced I feel that there is a lot of stage orange on this forum especially in the dating subforum... and it makes perfect sense. Some of the most popular videos are videos from 6 - 7 years ago and some of these videos are videos about relationships like: "How To Make A Girl Squirt - Give Your Girl An Explosive Orgasm", "How To Make A Girl Fall In Love With You - What Girls Really Want", "What Women Want In A Man - 5 Factors That Hook Women Like Crack", "How To Have Amazing Sex (For Women) - Drive Your Man Wild In Bed", "How To Be Attractive - The Ultimate Attraction Strategy", etc. My intuition is telling me here that even if these videos are old they are still getting a lot of views compared to recent videos because everyone is so obsessed with sex. I remember the video "How To Make A Girl Squirt - Give Your Girl An Explosive Orgasm" having 1M views a few years ago, but now has more than 2.2M views. It means that it received more than 200K views in a few years which is a lot of views compared to recent videos. My intuition is also telling me that as there is some stage Orange in these videos, a certain number of people who watch them want to learn more and therefore join this forum mostly in the hope of getting advice to get laid. I think that people who watch these videos are mostly inexperienced or people who want some advice but also include a subgroup of desperate virgins who are mostly men because Leo is a man and often has a very masculine approach which they relate to. This makes the dating subforum particularly low conscious. Also, Leo is a very sexual person and often makes references to sex and people sometimes take that literally, copy him because he has a lot of influence, and therefore contributes to low consciousness. The previous point now brings me to spirituality. I feel that there is a stage Orange approach to spirituality in this community and that Leo has a stage Orange mindset towards spirituality. I don't read the Meditation, Consciousness, Enlightenment, Spirituality subforum that much because I'm more concerned about basic stuff, but I sense some competition here. I remember people comparing how enlightened they are in the past. Competition can be healthy in some situations but doesn't apply to enlightenment because enlightenment is deeply personal. I see this issue with young people around my age. If you are around my age (or younger), here's my advice: there is no need to compete for enlightenment, having a basic foundation is more important. I think that the balance for young people should be around 70% basic stuff, 30% spiritual work. Spiritual work is important, but diving into it too early causes issues because it doesn't have a solid base, yet it can help with building the foundation if targeted properly on specific issues. There is no need to go deep for someone who doesn't even have a proper base in life, there's no need to do long meditation retreats, psychedelics, or similar things, yet a bit of spirituality is healthy (a bit of meditation, a bit of introspection, some shadow work, etc.) and brings balance to the process which is why I consider the 70/30 ratio as ideal. There is a lot of stage Orange here, stage Orange hiding behind other MEMEs, stage Orange competing to be seen as Green, or Yellow, or Turquoise. I'm not immune to that, I also did it to some degree to be honest, but it's important to be aware of it. About Actualized.org Clips Leo recently created a new channel called Actualized.org Clips which contains small segments of his long videos. My opinion on that is mixed. On one hand, I think that it's great to open Actualized.org more because it has the potential to help a lot of people, but on the other hand, the fact that the teachings are now so advanced makes them difficult to understand for beginners. I personally didn't know about spirituality when I discovered Actualized.org, however, the videos weren't as advanced as they are now, and because of that, I was able to follow through. Nevertheless, I acknowledge that I did create some beliefs in the past, so I still need to be careful here. About Newcomers I think that there should be a system in place to handle beginners, something like a warning at the beginning of the videos (for both Actualized.org and Actualized.org Clips channels) or a link that would point to a video (or a set of videos) specially designed for beginners so that they don't go down the wrong path. Also if moderators could welcome new members and ask them a few questions to understand where they are in life, it could guide them and help to maintain a healthy community. Finally, an effort needs to be made from Leo and moderators to make the advice more nuanced rather than saying things like: "You are god!", "Life doesn't matter", etc. because people can take things too literally. This is what I think happened with the recent suicide, the member got brainwashed from interacting with the community to the point where he thought that suicide doesn't matter because everything is imaginary and can be a proper way to enlightenment. About Responsibility The original response to the suicide really felt like a stage Orange company that declines all responsibilities. Like a tobacco company that claims to not be responsible for causing cancer to countless people. Sure, the material is completely different and is way more healthy than what does a tobacco company, but the way of handling responsibility is exactly the same. I think that Leo has some stage Orange shadows in him. When there is an exchange between two people responsibility is always shared, no one has 100% responsibility where at the same time the other person has 0% responsibility. How Leo communicates the material is important, how he communicates on the forum is important because he has a lot of influence and many people can take him literally. That's the problem with all religions, people get brainwashed, and that's what is happening here too. "God" isn't God, but just a pointer. Saying "You are God" isn't being God. I'm personally aware that I have the belief that I am God, I sure experienced some awakenings in the past, but for the moment the fact that I am God is only a belief because I didn't fully verify it. I'm just a believer of Leo here, it's important to be conscious of that. Even if it has been said many times that Actualized.org is not an ideology some people are getting brainwashed anyway and are confusing the map for the territory. To end up, I don't consider that the suicide is mostly Leo's fault, yet he does have some responsibility.

Everyone that is emotional about a strong, dogmatic, belief feels this way. For example religious people have felt like this through history, if we look at modern day isis suicide bombers, they truly believe they are doing Gods work and saving people. This is an extreme example but the point is any belief system is going to believe that they are right and everyone else is wrong and when you take that stance it naturally follows that you would want to prevent those you love from going to hell or doing the wrong thing. This would be the obvious trajectory of such a belief which goes to show the dogma involved, in that theyre so sure they are willing to pull others into it. I dont agree with everything about science and it can also be dogmatic, but at the very least they will rarely say we are 100% sure about something, theyll just say this is what the evidence shows, in theory they will also take on new evidence and have an overall scientific consensus about what can be said to be 'scientific fact'. This is not the case with religion or other dogmatic beliefs, hence the emotional responses. This is true on both sides, you can get bad science and you can get people emotional being written off. But again the emotions come from having a belief. If you said 'i think Leo is 30' you wouldnt really care if someone else said hes 35, you may want to know which is true and then you would do further research, but either way you wouldnt be emotional about it because it doesnt have much bearing on you and youre not attached to the outcome of it. However if for whatever reason you felt certain he was 30 and it was important to you, those that then said hes 35 would be seen as enemies or at the very least wrong, you would definitely get emotional about it as you would feel attacked or not understood, you may even start questioning how we measure age or something like that. As i said many people are not necessarily attached emotionally to taking a vaccine, whereas people who are against it are. Pro-trump and anti trump was different in that the argument was emotional on both sides, the vaccine issue is more anti-vaxx bumping up against the scientific establishment rather than people on the other side. The paper you posted was quite interesting in that it said that science is falling behind in terms of the communication to the public, anti-vaxxers are getting better at visually showing their points. It also talks about how people are now taking science is seen by anti-maskers in this case, as an individual thing that they do and have autonomy over and is no longer seen by them as something with a scientific consensus and using the current scientific method. Which is an interesting way to look at it, so essentially its not even a case of anti-vax or not its more a thing of do you trust the scientific method and those that have studied these things for years or do you trust in your own ability to go through all these scientific journals and come to a conclusion off your own back. One thing i have noticed is that those that dont trust the scientific method always start off with an anti-science leaning, they also tend to have dogmatic beliefs whether it be vaccines or whatever. Personally i have no problem with the challenging of science, you should always question it, but you also have to appreciate where its good points are and how it can be useful.

@gggkkk I can recommend you a few books. There are no practical books about psychedelics, as the most practical thing is just to take them, haha, but a few of them might catch your attention. Here are the books I have read, alphabetical order, favourites in bold: Aldous Huxley - Island (Literary classic, it's very interesting to read Brave New World first, written before Huxley discovered psychedelics, and then the Island, which is a reply to that story changing the vision of the future from dystopia to some kind of low-key, realistic utopia.) Ayelet Waldman - A Really Good Day (Book about microdosing, written by a normie who had nothing to do with psychedelics, interesting.) Brian C. Muraresku - The Immortality Key (Newest anthropology book about ancient drug use, also touches on subjects of pagan death cults and pagan-christianity continuity theory. Written by a researcher who has never done psychedelics, on purpose, so his work doesn't get demonized or labeled as ravings of a lunatic. Interesting as fuck.) Carl L. Hart - Drug Use for Grown-Ups (Responsible drug use, decriminalization advocacy, full of captivating personal stories. Dr Carl Hart is someone who wears his heart on his sleeve. Great guy.) Christopher M. Bache - LSD and the Mind of the Universe (Story of a hardcore philosopher who dosed extremely strong LSD doses twice a year for decades to do his research.) James Fadiman - Psychedelic Explorer's Guide (Oldie, not that goldie anymore, haha. The content of this book is normal knowledge on the internet nowadays.) Jim DeKorne - Psychedelic Shamanism (Dangers of choosing that path. Some interesting points made.) Mark Fisher - K-Punk Politics (Has a chapter at the end from his never finished book about "Acid Communism", because of the suicide he commited. ) Martin Ball - Being Human (READ THIS SHIT, the finest biography of the finest 5-MeO-DMT researcher) Martin Ball - Being Infinite Martin Ball - Entheogenic Liberation Martin Ball - God's Handbook Michael Pollan - How to Change Your Mind (Various interviews, stories and a personal adventure of discovering something new. Typical Pollan's book, but about psychedelics. Great.) Rupert Sheldrake - Ways to Go Beyond and Why They Work (Has chapter on psychedelics if I remeber correctly, but overall it's a worthwhile book. Rupert is similar to Leo in my opinion.)

Every time I look into the mirror I want to dowse myself in gasoline and light myself on fire. I was born with a benign vascular tumor above my upper lip and was bullied throughout all of school for it (I actually had it surgically removed at 15 but that didn't change a goddamn thing, I'm still ugly without it.). I've literally never had any sort of relationship and I don't think I ever will, which really fucks with my self esteem so I'm super uber arrogant to compensate. I want to delude myself into thinking I'm not ugly not because I want sex or a relationship, but because I think it will drive me to suicide if I don't. It is like a fucking curse that has haunted me since I was born, it isn't a belief, it is reality, it is so real I think it is hurting my business, I think people are ruder and less compassionate toward me because of it, I think its why I could never make friends. How can I just deny it and then deny my denial of it? I'm 23 btw

@Thetruthseeker I have to say I have definitely experienced something similar with the people around me. It seems to be a lot easier to talk to someone coming from a 'holistic health' perspective where they believe the vaccine in unnatural or toxic, or that it is going to prevent spiritual experiences, then it is talking to someone who has subscribed to the more full-blown anti-vax conspiracy theories. Try not to give up on your friends if you think they're open enough to understanding the necessity and importance of the covid-vaccine. Trust me, I know it's very tiring to hear ridiculous covid-spiracies all the time. My parents are convinced that I'm committing suicide by getting vaccinated so as you can imagine there's a lot of tension. One thing that really helps when you're dealing with people like that is just knowing that they are really suffering, filled with fear and stress, misunderstanding and false information. Be a little playful when you talk about the vaccine, take some of the edge off it can really cause people to open up when they know that it's a calm and low-tension environment to discuss their fears. As oppose to say, getting angry at them and pointing out all the places that there's something wrong with their reasoning etc. it can really help I find.

Hi all, I'm not sure who to come to about this as I feel it is a unique situation. I'll preface this by being upfront in saying I'm not sure I'm 100% anti-suicide. I think life goes on, and maybe it's actually part of people's path, something themselves and those affected were meant to experience and learn from. From experience, I think allowing people the space to fully go into this feeling can provide tremendous growth that may be hindered by the knee-jerk reaction of most people to freak out and just tell people to "get help", to get institutionalized, medicated.. societal tendencies to be terrified of death, to not want to be responsible for another's death, leading to many living half-lives and not fully facing their demons. That said, I think it's a tragic waste of conscious life, and I really fucking don't want my brother to kill himself. My brother, 45 y/o, has been battling severe Lyme disease for the past 20 years. It went untreated too long and he feels his entire jaw/cheekbones/sinuses are infected beyond any treatment, as he's tried just about everything. He has to sauna for 2 hrs daily to get the toxins the bacteria produce out or the pain is unbearable. I know this sounds like not a huge time sink or price to pay for living, but it's become hell for him. I've tried to make him see that suffering can be a result primarily of the stories the mind makes, encouraged him to pursue meditation more, but it's hard to do without invalidating his experience. Maybe I should be blunter and direct but nobody else in the family has much compassion for him or even believes he's as sick as he claims to be. He has been living with my parents and feels guilty about being a weight on them, but is also just mentally exhausted and depressed from this journey. Only this year has he stopped the endless, taxing attempts at curing the Lyme. He has concurrently developed himself spiritually as much of his healing attempts have purified/evolved his energy body, and been going into some deep "game" with reality/energies where he feels he is given sort of clues by the universe and feels he is sort of "building" something for the afterlife. He won't go into details with me as he thinks it would spoil it for me if I end up getting into the same thing. I don't think he's crazy but I do wonder whether during his darker times he got connected with some weird/trickster energies that could be taking him for a ride (He mentioned knowing someone who seemed to be going through the same thing but then seemed to go insane and dropped contact with everyone). He is an incredibly intelligent guy and sees the world/symbols/data differently than anyone I've seen, so it's not surprising that he thinks he's on the brink of "winning the game" of reality even though he also sees the foolishness in that concept. It's very tied up in hopes for a better afterlife/next life. This seems to have given his life purpose up until recently as he feels he has been stuck on something for a few years, and suspects he has hit sort of a karmic limit. I have been trying to convince him to try a change of environment, offered him my apartment, offered to send him to different types of healing centers, but he is resolute that his body is just done, and he wants out. He knows he could perhaps live another 30 painful years but thinks he's unable to work, is unable to get a disability because Lyme isn't recognized for that in Canada, and he just has no hope for any relief of his chronic suffering. "It's not a matter of if, but when", he says as he has no plans of continuing past dementia setting in. He is definitely being a bit selfish about the effect it would have on the family, but my (Christian) mother has also been trying to guilt him out of this idea which is its own form of selfishness and not helpful. Because of this, I've tried to just be someone he feels safe talking to. I've come close to suicide in the past and it was very life-changing to come close and choose not to, so rather than trying to explicitly talk him out of it I've just wanted to help him through it in hopes he would come to the realization on his own that it's not the answer...I feel strongly that it's not the answer for him right now in the bad headspace he's in, but at the same time I can't imagine what he's going through and I honestly can't yet bring myself tell him to toughen up and get through it, let alone commit him to a mainstream medical professional as most of the culture would suggest...I've tried to make him see that maybe it's not an accident that he's experiencing this, that his strength is what allowed him to live this reality and it could be happening for him in a way he doesn't yet see..but he has a more pessimistic view of reality, hardheadedness and plenty of bitterness as well. I have tried to be there for him as much as possible and felt like it was something that would pass if he took a break from the treatments, or thought it was at least years away, but I think he's planning it for within the next few months. He sat down with my dad to tell him his plans, who tried to assure him the money to support him wasn't a problem, but ultimately didn't try to talk him out of it as he has a way of withdrawing just trusting God. This made my mom start telling my whole family how serious it is and he's been even more stressed and overwhelmed by everyone reaching out to him with sympathy and concern. He must fear an intervention or something because he asked me to hold onto something for him for a week...it's a container full of hydromorphone..I suspected he was already equipped, and now I feel I'm actually very responsible for his life. Yet I don't know how where the line is...he would easily get more from the dark web if I didn't give it back to him...but I honestly don't know how I could give it back to him. I also don't know if I could use it to get him committed somewhere, that sounds like the cruelest thing I could do. Is there some facility that's actually really nice and understanding, that has a sauna and professional counselors who are somewhat "woke", not just clinging to life, trying to keep people alive at all costs even if suffering? Is there anything else I can do?

@BipolarGrowth I appreciate your thoughts on Mahasamadhi’s relationship to this forum. It makes sense now that it’s really just not something anyone clicking on a forum would really need to talk about lol. Just adds to the confusion. Also I feel rather stupid. As someone who has not had a massive ego death, seeing a response like “you’d have to die” is a little unsettling. But it’s often mental/ego death discussed here and that’s likely all Leo was saying. Scary framing though, especially if you do not realize he does not mean to commit suicide. Nonetheless, it’s not wrong to say. Just a fine line and a lot of potential confusion assuming people do not realize their ideas have to die, not them physically.

@Death_ This was about the perspective of Mahasamadhi, physical death and suicide on this forum - not Mahasamadhi. I do not care about Mahasamadhi.

No one here that I’ve ever seen has advocated for suicide. Leo has talked about death in a much less frightening and even pleasant way. This is common in plenty of other popular spiritual teachings. This helps people to lose fear and anxiety of death that eats away at their ability to live, but they can think of death as some shortcut too. This is not what Leo or anyone here is promoting. We ultimately understand death in a less confrontational way than materialists which allows us to speak more freely of it and with a less negative air, but I still don’t think even the most extreme person who visits here with any frequency would really want someone to intentionally end their life in the case of suicide. Mahasamadhi is not the exact same, but it isn’t really healthy to focus on that here. No one here is at that level of development to be able to make a conscious choice to spiritually leave the body. Leo explicitly said anyone who is that developed has no place on the forum essentially — at least it’s certain this applies to anyone wanting to teach it or promote it.

Firstly, I am not interested in Mahasamadhi itself, more so the thoughts around it on this forum. I am also curious on the attitude of physical death and/or suicide I have noticed on this forum. I am by no means suggesting these at all. Again, I am curious on the perspective of these things, here on the forum, not the things themselves. Is it for liability reasons the dialogue is so back and forth on such topics as suicide, mahasamadhi, physical death, etc.? Right after the mention of someone committing suicide and the specific and general warnings that followed, via one of the newest videos, I could not help but notice Leo telling someone the quickest way to end suffering is to kill yourself, on the forum. Or maybe he just said die; I may not be remembering correctly. Of course the specific context would change the meaning of what he said, yet either way it leads me to ask, what is the stance on physical death, killing yourself physically and Mahasamadhi on this forum? Sometimes I hear something like ‘that’s not what we do here’ and other times it’s seems more welcomed than not. My impression is this has a lot to do with liability and it is hard to express here on the forum. It is probably quite difficult to articulate the ‘meaninglessness’ of the topics above while also portraying their severity and seriousness. Edit/PS: I am seeking clarity on these subjects; not trying to accuse or give criticism. I love you all and it is not often I find a message that is not clear and concise from this community. So, when I do, here we are.

Yeah personally here too I had a suicide attempt due to disassociation from his teachings. His teachings taught about death and getting rid of the ego, and I did just that, only to get super disassociated and ungrounded. I tapped super into the spiritual world because of this and attracted demonic spirits which lead me to feeling like I had no other choice besides suicide. After 9 months of trying to recover from the energetic damage that I've done to myself I'm still healing and dealing with some of these issues, and with the help of angels, I will be saved. Also I do agree Leo is arrogant and rude to people on this forum and makes assumptions about people before even knowing them.

https://www.ynet.co.il/news/article/BJnPBL6KO Here are a few pictures of their "peace" demonstration. Interestingly enough there are many countries including Russia and China that don't recognize Hamas as a terrorist organization. (It's still all about the cold war, the countries that are with america and countries that are against it.) When your culture is war, violence and suicide there can't be peace. They have launched rockets at innocent civilians time after time and they will keep doing so, mark my words. One can't be a peaceful leftist with the constant threat of rockets and lynchings in their own country. Just look at the rise of anti-Semitism around the world. I agree occupation sucks balls, but the Jewish people don't have another place to call home.

Hedonism Through the Stages I've been thinking of where I'm at when it comes to what I want to experience, work towards, and grow into. And I think there is this part of me that wants to live a more hedonistic life style just to get somethings out of my system. When it comes to hedonistic life styles, because western society's center of gravity is stage orange, traditionally we think of the Dan Bilzerian and Jordan Belforts of the world. Filthy rich, expensive sports cars, being surrounded by models, cocaine, etc. It's clearly very egotistical and insatiable. I'm pretty sure there is a trope that is along the lines of rich girl/guy parties, does drugs, chases success but then ends up depressed because they realized that those things don't make them happy and that they are hollow because they never paid attention to the meaningful parts of life. For me, the hedonistic life style I want is more along the lines of stage green hedonism. For me it's along the lines of travelling to countries, exploring different cultures, collecting experiences instead of things, connecting with a ton of people, having an amazing romantic relationship, finding creative work etc. But at the same time, I see the limits of this. Because ultimately, things external to us won't make us happy even if they are something that is more higher consciousness like collecting experiences instead of collecting Lamborghinis. I think a really good example of the limits of stage green hedonism can be seen in Anthony Bourdain's life. His whole thing was travelling, exploring different cultures, having good conversations with the locals while shedding light of the social issues in the area, exploring different cuisines, etc. I don't know what he or really any other celebrity is like when the cameras aren't rolling but from what I remembered, there wasn't any indication from his work of anything being superficial or hollow like what one would think of with stage orange hedonism. His work was very stage green and very heart centered. But he still killed himself. This is such a cliche when it comes to celebrities when the commit suicide where people are like "oh ___ had it all, the money, the power, the success, the fame, the beautiful spouse, and the beautiful home but they were still depressed." And it was similar to how many people reacted to Bourdain's death. But instead of being like "look he had such a well rounded life and he was truly making an impact, but he was still depressed." I'm not someone who is impacted by celebrity deaths mainly because I'm not very tuned into celebrity culture in general. But I remember being 18 and this instance having an impact on me. It felt weird. I liked Bourdain's work but not so much to where I binged his show and was a fan so it wasn't some type of parasocial fixation. Now looking back, I think it was this implicit realization that all of the travelling, all of the good conversations, all of the social justice, all of the quality relationships still won't make me happy. I think part of me back then looked up to Bourdain's life style and saw it as aspirational and knowing that despite all that he was so depressed to where he committed suicide. It felt threatening to my ego because I'm here thinking this will bring me happiness but clearly it actually doesn't based on how he ended up. It was me realizing that stage green hedonism is still a form of hedonism even if society might think it's a more conscious form of it. Stage red hedonism to me is like stage orange but more brutal, gaudy, and animalistic (think golden toilets, hunting lions for sport, and having a gold pleated AK-47). Don't know what stage blue hedonism would look like since that stage is built on repression. I already talked about stage orange and green hedonism. Stage yellow hedonism to me might be along the lines of having this insatiable thirst for knowledge and research because you don't realize that analyzing and thinking too much can make you miserable because it cuts out from being. I really don't know what stage turquoise hedonism would look like. I'm guessing that it would be chasing mystical stages by any means necessary whether it would be doing WAAY too many psychedelics or going to some other super extreme level. So yeah, hedonism isn't isolated to only one stage of the spiral. The reason why I strived for this stage green hedonism when I was 16-18 years old was a reaction against stage orange hedonism and it's definition of a successful, well lived life. I was moving deeper into green and to me the hedonism at stage orange was so obviously limited and hollow to me. I also had a lot of anxiety regarding figuring my life out and becoming an adult and my number one goal was to live the most meaningful and fulfilling life possible without wasting my time of stupid shit. Even now, one of my big fears is wasting the one life I have. I think now I have a healthy dose of nihilism in me to where I can be more carefree, but back then I couldn't sit with that nihilism. I had to find meaning in something or else what even is my life? Why tf am I here? So why is it that after all of this I still want a stage green hedonism? What's different this time around compared to where I was at in my late teens? Me in 2019 and onwards: Now at 21 I see indulging in this stage green hedonism as scratching an itch rather than seeing it as a life style I have to have. It's wanting to travel, make friends, have good conversations, and a significant other but not necessarily needing it. It's being able to enjoy those things instead of getting attached to it as the pinnacle of meaning and fulfillment in life. Again, there is a healthy sense of hedonism. I would compare it to me finding out that I'm going on a yacht party tomorrow. I would enjoy myself and take in that experience, but I wouldn't be yearning for that lifestyle and day dreaming of becoming super wealthy to where going to yacht parties is what brings me meaning and is what is my norm. Travelling and connecting to people is defiantly something that I want but it isn't this deep existential craving that I had in my late teens. The desire is there but my attachment isn't. Me from 2016-2018: In my late teens however, stage green hedonism felt like the blueprint for living an actualized life much like how some people see the glamor of stage orange hedonism as the one should strive for. Rather than being attached to achievement, I was attached to finding meaning. I think there is a part of me that is attached to finding meaning and analyzing things which is why it's rare for me to dip into nihilism. Part of it stemmed from fear particularly the fear of wasting my life or the fear of messing up my life. I still have anxieties regarding those things now but I have worked through a lot of it tbh. Those fears are still here now but they are not anywhere near as existential crisis inducing as it was back then. Back then I really thought those things would bring me happiness. Now I can see those things are something to enjoy but it isn't the end all be all. Because even if you do end up living the stage green hedonistic lifestyle of your dreams, if you don't take care of other areas of your life and work through your regular human shit and the traumas that you accumulated, well you're still going to be miserable. In my late teens I understood the importance of working on myself but my understanding back then wasn't as deep as it is now. There was still a part of me back then that thought happiness is external. There is still a part of me now that is like that based on the complaining I do on here but I'd say that I have become better than before.

Listen, I am the last to criticize Leo. I have saw his face in the clouds before, as a Jesus like diety. But I will tell you that the way he teaches lacks compassion, embodiment of understanding that not everyone has perfect mental health and life conditions like he was gifted with. Yeah Leo worked hard for his life, but so have I and I feel like Leo is way too arrogant to be in the position of power he is in. We all are starting to see Leos shadow and insecurities manifest in his students. The denial of Jesus, thinking you're more woke than anyone on here is just bullshit Leo. Its just funny how I thought this man was the most enlightened being on the planet like the new Jesus and I feel like I am a better teacher than he is at this point. he just knows how to master market and manipulate people. I don't play by those games, sorry bro. you are not more conscious than me. I have spent 300 days in mental hospitals, that is nothing to your claim of being so radically conscious that you would have been put on meds in your blog, so laughable that you used that statement to prove a point when I and many others go through these hospitals on a regular basis due to your ill teaching methods and lack of personal humbleness and passion for helping mentally ill people. You just dismiss mental illness like its beneath you bro. Getting heated but seriously. I almost died from these teachings, secret service showing up to the hospital, jail, permanent psych ward state hospital, suicide, etc. Leo is not perfect y'all. just a reminder. he still jerks off for fucks sake lol

Welcome to all. Hope you have some thick skin. You'll need it! ? My 2 cents is I think suicide threads should be shut down and the user PM'd by the new mods willing to deal with emotional issues. This really isn't the format for those types of threads.

That's a good feedback I very much appreciate whatever you're doing for the forum. Also I would like to add to guide people to not overlook objectivity while following spiritual concepts. I messaged you a long feedback on this. Also change forum guidelines and add more disclaimers for suicide and body harm, psychedelics and mahasamadhi etc. On the main page of the guidelines

Antinatalists hold that because birth is the cause of all suffering, not reproducing is the highest act of love and empathy for your would-be child. I held a strongly antinatalist view of reproduction until my first LSD trip last year. In this trip, I seen a girl who I recognized as being my daughter. I watched snippets of her whole life as she grew up into an intelligent and loving person. This left me feeling shaken and uncomfortable as it was such a dramatically antithetic theme to what I had believed. I've tried focusing on this in subsequent trips in order to wrap this up and come to some conclusion, but instead I am still extremely conflicted. Before this trip, I had spent 4 years deeply depressed with a suicide attempt under my belt from before I began self actualizing, This trip showed me that life is a gift, darknesss is light, and that this experience, this place, this thing, is the most profound beauty that exists. It gave me an entirely new perspective on life. Still though, even if we argue that life's joys make it worth its suffering (for those of us in first world countries etc anyway), the fact remains that a child does not choose to exist, reproduction is awful for the environment, and the world is already overpopulated. Breeding is a gamble with someone else's life to make a mini-me. Most people are horrible parents.

I've been working out daily which has had a positive effect on my sleep, I've been sleeping well these past few days and I don't feel the the urge to lay in bed after I wake up. I've been struggling with loneliness again lately and I'm not sure what to do, none of my solutions in the past were very effective and I just got past that phase after a while. I'm trying to accept that it's something I'll have to ride out again but it's tough. I don't have a lot of meaningful human contact throughout the day so that seems like the obvious cause of my loneliness but part of me wonders if there's something deeper, I'm not too sure. I've been trying to connect with my family better lately. I talk with my immediate family occasionally but I'm not very open with them and it's really sad the more I think about it, our conversations feel formal and they're similar to how I'd talk with my apartment neighbors when we share an elevator. I called my brother to see how he was doing and he sounded glad to hear from me, we used to be really close but we've drifted apart over the years. I realized lately that I've never been 100% open and honest with anyone in my life, that doesn't sound very healthy when I write it down like this. I want to open up to my brother about my recent struggles and my thoughts of suicide, I feel like it would be nice to tell someone but at the same time I'm hesitant because I don't want to offload my emotional problems on him and overwhelm him.

One that occurred to me recently while thinking about the recent suicide: Leo gives you the impression that death = infinite unconditional love-bliss, complete understanding, total onenss and all the other facets of enlightenment. Though he clearly and overtly discourages his viewers from doing any physical harm to themselves, some will inevitably jump to that conclusion, thinking themselves to be so fed up with life, or such a spiritual badass that they can take a short cut and jump straight to enlightenment by suicide. The bias of course being that Leo and everyone else alive reading this are alive. Whatever levels of consciousness are reached, that consciousnes also resides in a living human body looking through physical eyes. What if maybe, possibly, perhaps, "enlightenment" as anyone can conceive of it from the human perspective, is only possible for incarnated beings. What if those who have died before reaching that level of consciousness in their lifetime do not become instantly "enlightened" upon death, and instead, will return in physical form for as many lifetimes as it takes before that self-realization unfolds while alive? I can't claim to know, point is that having mystical experiences of any sort, while giving you sharable insights into reality, doesn't necessarily mean you know what would happen (in the proximate sense) after anyone else becomes physically dead for real, permanently.

@Understander I dont know I often feel the urge out of lonliness to post TRUTH on Facebook. And I have done it several times. But after the suicide of one person on this forum , I wonder whether posting radical think can trigger depression . What if they find the truth and started believing it and went to depression ? They will probably brush off my post as they are religious. In fact most of them dont even like my enlightenment post. Now my likes has decreased since then. Like volume has decreased since I started opening myself up more. I want to clear that most of my friends on facebook are religious and worship their gods.

I am pursuing enlightenment since many years. And I often feel the urge to post on my facebook account that Life is a dream in infinite mind of god, You are God, There is no others etc Post like that. I posted many times enlightenment sayings such as of ramana maharshi , Allan Watts, Muktananada, Ram Das, Adyashanti etc. Now people have stopped liking my post . I have witness people are not liking my post more as compared to previous. They think I am strange and weird. And after suicide of that person on this forum , it concern me whether I am doing even something right by posting on timeline that you are God, There is no others etc. And other enlightenment sayings. Most of my friends on facebook are very religious. And worship gods. And I am highly spiritually and into enlightenment. And several times felt urge to post such things on my facebook . Is this my EGO that is posting such posts . As I am showing off look guys I am into spirituality. Can it harm other people by discovering the TRUTH?? As most of the people are religious and worship gods . And have full faith in their religious. I sometimes feel urge to write Truth on facebook Publicly .

@Zeroguy Ok I am sorry. Please don't joke about suicide though or say that anybody's suicide is understandable like this. It is really hard to distinguish between what you mean seriously and what you do not mean seriously, I hope you are aware of that. I appreciate your concern and I am sorry I was not able to recognize it.