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Im talking about being god realized/enlightened as daily base consciousness. A true saint is like 1 in 10.000.000 , not even talking about enlightened ones. They can't even work because they're in bliss consciousness and one with everything at these levels usually god operates through them. So truely i tell to you no1 is at this level on this forum maybe Leo only because the way he talks like a channel for god for hours if he does it without psychedelics he might be at a level of saint or enlightened

Maybe of interest to some It began with the realization, that death is coming. The end is near, much closer than expected. Why? Because I will be submerged in the ocean within thirty seconds - I live on an island, and I see a walls of waves higher than the island coming from all directions. I sat down at a table with 3 teachers. I had to choose one of them as my personal mentor. I made my choice, and we all joined by the hands, calmly awaiting death as the waves crashed. When the pain of it should have started, bliss surrounded us. The ocean was full of innocent love. I saw an orca approaching me and opening its mouth. Instead of avoiding, I entered with confidence and surrender. Then arose the Unspeakable. The God in his Glory. Infinite Beauty in its highest form. The shining of the thousand suns as described in the Bhagavad Gita. I had a mandala made that looks somewhat similar, but not dynamic and made out of light and infinitely creative. Image attached. And that was not the end because I was reborn. Birth is just a new hallucination instead of the older one - beuty changes his clothes and puts on a dream. Oneness becomes separate. I saw how the dream is created in the present moment - the whole process of it manifesting out of Love and Light. I sit in that new dream - a new universe altogether, in the corner of a room, on the same island as previously. The Island is the island of Madeira. The year is 1961, but there are technologies that we have in 2022. I'm still in an extremely high state, and I realize that I can change my body as I want. I start creating myself anew, the perfect form within the human domain. And then forgetfulness happened, and then I came back to this dream here. On a different note - I think that dancing alone, for the pure enjoyment of moving your body to the rhythm of the song, to express the emotion within the song with motions in your body, is the highest form of worshipping God within the domain of form, when you are still stuck in a human body. It's a symbolic representation of heaven because it's self-gratifying, solo (solips..) , beautiful, has a depth of emotions, and is alive. That's it papi, have a good day.

Hey, are you blissing out during those sessions and during the day? When I bliss out, there is no attraction for those things, because they would reduce your pleasure, not increase it. Plus its kinda bothersome, you have to do something. Why do anything when you got what its all about when you close your eyes and stay still? Anyway.. that is one point. Another is that you are probably raising your sexual energy upwards, consequentally there is less energy buildup in the lower chakras, so you dont feel that significant of a pull towards porn. But I dunno for sure whatsup.

Only pursue this work, when you are ready to go all the way. Spirituality is all about going all the way. Would you talk to a romantic partner you like only partially? Or would you go all the way? Would you negotiate for a car you desire that you can afford and need and then not go all the way? Would you take a test for a certification you desire that you studied for...and then stop before its finished? Spirituality....is the most dangerous thing in the entire world. More dangerous than a nuke, than World War 3, than another pandemic. Its the TRUTH. Its the answer to all the big existential questions....about death, about the building block of reality, about humanities potential next step in their development process, and the meaning of your life. If you aren't ready for that...go enjoy your life in ignorance and bliss!!! You should only do the work.....when you are ready to sacrifice EVERYTHING....and I mean....EVERYTHING!!! Obviously....you don't have too do that....but the will needs to be that strong to go all the way.

This is a monologue to get everything out of my head and to look at it from a bit of distance from whatever emotions are being stirred up at the time of the thought process. I'm trying to get to the end of searching but, I'm not done yet. I'm 26 years old and I didn't really start socialising properly until i was 18 back in 2014 when i went to college and then university. The same year I discovered this channel and fell in love with it. This channel came to me when I needed it the most, when I was 17 I didn't want to live anymore I was so isolated, felt miserable constantly , had to structure to my day or vision for anything I didn't think life was inherently not worth living, but that my life was pointless I had nothing going on and no-one to talk to. I did have my family which is brought me back from taking my own life , i had no social life but a really loving family. I realised I didnt really want to die when I put a plan into motion so the option was to get on with life and try have a go at it. just before moving away for college I discovered this channel In august 2014 I was searching for something like how to socialise or something and a bald guy with a catchy title was close to the top. Leo gave great advice which i followed partially, but since my brain is too logical and self focused it can only help so much, my brain loves models, but models don't work so well with socialising as people act based on feeling not based on procedures and rules, to neurotypicals, rules are just guidelines, they will break them if is unproductive, but i need to know whats going on and whats happening next so i clung close to those procedues which would frustrate people as following the rule and impose on people and breach social cues. Luckily i found a tribe that accepted me and put up with my awkwardness. I got some sexual experience with escorts so I would know about each act when it came down to having sex not transanctionally, people may judge me for that but i did the right thing, being a virgin meant I would be out of the loop and would further alienated my ability to relate to women, I just dont delve into my sexual past when they ask ignorance is bliss as they say I certainly dont want to know whos shes been with. Another problem with autism is lack of empathy or struggling with it, with autism theres more of a self focus and you think about whats practical for you rather than how other people think and feel about the situation, its not narcissism where you think you're more important than them but, more a self focus so you misread peoples social cues about what they're really communicating or what they expect from you, my autism wasnt so bad that people totally rejected me but I understand there frustration at me. I had very little girl experience at 18, kissed a couple of girls at school and had crushes, but i never really chatted and flirted with them properly, I was mostly in my head day dreaming about the cosmos and philosophy. When I first started college a girl from our friendship group must have found me cute has she dm'd me on facebook with kissess asking what i was up to but i gave the most friendliest response I was completely oblivious. I wasn't interested in her anyway thats probably why i didn't pick up on it, I don't tend to notice unless i like them as well. I'd say I don't really get interested in a girl until she shows me interest, BUT when she does show interest my logical brain concludes 'the deal is done' and I should start making a 10 step action plan to get to know them and make it work, but thats not how it works attraction is more of a sliding scale you can gain attraction, you can loose attraction its not one or the other, so being overly concerned with the action plan made me come across as too needy as I was more focused on that than being fun and letting them fall for me, so when they lost attraction I would forget about them as they are no longer showing interest which would make them interested in me again as now I've forgotten about the action plan and gone back to my normal goofball self, but then when shes shows interest again my logical brain goes back to the action and destroys the attraction again, at this point shes not going to try another time. My brain is like LOOK LADY U EITHER LIKE ME OR NOT , DAFUQ IS GOING ON HERE" . I suppose since men like a girls looks and general vibe getting to know them isnt so much as an interest but for women it is, they want to fall in love, they want a deep connection of someone they feel really bonded to. I suppose the autistic brain being heavily self focused just is just oblivious to the females agenda and thinks of her agenda as the same as his. I had my first girlfriend at 18 which last about a month, we never had sex, she had learning difficulties as well not sure what, possibly autism, but she was on learning support at college so on a lower level than everyone else suppose its more like high school what she was doing, she couldn't make eye contact which was something I never really struggled with. At the end of the day we just weren't compatible but logical brain felt like a failure for not making it work and that it was my fault, when she backed away I thought I would be romantic and surprise visit her which just frustrated her as i was picking up on social cue that she was backing away, but my logical brain was like Ill just try a bit harder and try and do things better, I suppose you could class it as mild stalking , but that wan't my intention I was just socially cluesless and without experience. I suppose the same goes for friendships as well you either gel or you dont no about of trying to make things work or strategizing with get you a friendship, I suppose i didnt want sex and intimacy from my friends so I wasn't so bothered about that not working, I want some i gel with for a friend, but I'd try it with any woman as I had to get the experience points and be established. I feel if society didnt put so much pressure on guys to have sex this wouldn't be so much of a problem, everyone makes fun of the looser male virgin and now we have an incel crisis. I would say thats the biggest lesson I've learnt you either gel or you don't , stratergising doesnt work and if they have the hots for you and you have great convo then she will do her part as you will yours, just like how you make friends but in more of a romantic a sexual way, mother nature does all of the heavy lifting. My final issue would be unwiring unhealthy social conditioning, when I was at school the incelphere was just coming about I couldn't fathom what it would be like to be at school now with the likes of andrew tate being endlessly shared on social media with isolate individuals, its not even about how to pick up women its just pure hatred , hatred for its own sake destroy the enemy just because i'm not included in society. I grew up in the countryside and being autistic ( although I didnt get diaginosed until 21 , i never fitted in, my friends left me behind at seconadary school as that is when you start socialising properly, I hung around with a few outcast kids , but i fell out with them as they fired at me with bb guns and with autism having a greater sense of senisitvity that quite upset me where as it wouldn't so much for a neuro typical, i was embarrased that it upset me so it just withdrew completely socially at 14, and discovered reddit, i developed quite cosmopolitan and left wing views since i never fitted in, i say that is a blessing in a sense since that drew me away from the racist backwards small minded farming community that I lived in. If i was neuro- typical id be some intollerant people hating farmer , the farming community dont like anyone thats not themselves , they're very tribal in that regard , its not just hating on foreign and not white people, they also hate city and town folk for not understanding and belong to their farming culture, so I'm glad my autism saved me from that. I didn't know about autism at school I got diagnosed at 21 after a college friend mentioned he just recently got his diagnosis after his father spotted the signs, I was much more social than him, i'd put it down to my obsession with sex, you need to socialise to have sex, but I also wanted to be a part of something so i was motivated to get male friends as well. Me not understanding why i was ostracized as i didnt know about autism brought me into hate filled communities on reddit, i suspect most of them are on the spectrum as well, when you dont understand something its easy just to blame people, they aren't accepting me so they are whats at fault, I remember in the mens right subreddit when there was some clip of some quiet kid being picked on for not following a social norm people would be like "this is why mass shootings happen" this was pretty much the hive mind and its epidemic, I'm glad i got out of those echo chambers and made some real friends. I GOT A SECOND CHANCE AT LIFE

"Still, our Steppenwolf has at least discovered a Faustian duality within himself, has found out that no unified soul inhabits the single entity that is his body and that at best he is just starting out on a long pilgrimage towards such an ideal inner harmony. He would like either to become wholly human by conquering the wolf in himself, or conversely to renounce his human side in order at least to live an integrated, undivided life as a wolf. He has presumably never observed a real wolf closely, otherwise he might have seen that animals too have no such things as unified souls; that the beautiful, taut frames of their bodies house a whole variety of aspirations and states of mind; that wolves suffer too, having dark depths within them. Oh no, human beings are always desperately mistaken and bound to suffer when they try to get 'back to nature'. Harry can never fully become a wolf again, and if he did he would realise that even wolves are not simple and primitive creatures but complex and many-sided. Wolves also have two and more than two souls in their wolves' breasts, and anyone desiring to be a wolf is guilty of the same kind of forgetfulness as the man who sings 'What bliss still to be a child!' The likeable but sentimental chap wih his song about the blissfully happy child would also like to get back to nature, to his innocent origins, but he has totally forgotten that children are by no means blissfully happy. Rather, they are capable of many conflicts, a host of contradictory moods, suffering of all kinds. There is no way back at all, either to the wolf or the child. Things do not begin in innocence and simplicity; all created beings, even the ostensibly simplest, are already guilty, already full of contradictions. Cast into the muddy stream of becoming they can never, never hope to swim back up against the current. The road to innocence, to the state before creation, to God, doesn't run backwards, either to the wolf or the child, but forwards, further and further into guilt, deeper and deeper into the experience of becoming fully human. Nor is suicide, poor Steppenwolf, a serious solution to your problem. You will just have to go down the longer, more onerous, more difficult road to becoming truly human. You will frequently have to multiply your two selves, make your already complex nature a great deal more complicated. Instead of making your world more confined and your soul simpler you are going to have to include more and more world, ultimately the entire world in your soul as it painfully expands, until one day, perhaps, you reach the end and find rest. This, in so far as they succeeded in the venture, is the path taken by Buddha, by all great human beings, some knowingly, others unconsciously. Every birth entails separation from the cosmos, enclosure within limits, isolation from God, painful self-renewal. Returning to the cosmos, overcoming the painful experience of individuation, achieving God-like status: all these entail an expansion of the soul to the point where it is once again able to contain the whole cosmos within itself." Steppenwolf, Hermann Hesse

@Leo Gura Ok, I have to post and share my thoughts on this. I rarely make posts here anymore and this will be my last. Your videos helped me a lot years ago when I was in a bad place, for that I will always be grateful. I am saying this as someone who wishes you the best truly. Take the advice or not, it's your life. You seriously need to take a break from substances and this forum, and being a public figure in general, imo. You complained some days ago that the criticism posted was too much on your psyche and now you are a bliss bunny and likely you will crash again. You are too ungrounded and have worked way too little on embodiment practices. The balance between major ungrounded psychedelic experiences and embodied practices and integration are drifting further and further apart, and from someone who is looking at this from a distance it is becoming blatantly obvious. Please relax, take a break, and work on embodiment, because that is your biggest blind spot. People that are cheering you on about this are not your friends, and likewise, you people that are cheering Leo on are not in a good trajectory spiritually speaking. This is turning into a potentially very harmful thing. My 2 cents, call me close-minded if you want. Be well, Leo. Thanks for everything.

So we are just the awareness. Just the present moment? So detach from the idea that reality is real & only a dream or a fantasy? Stop taking life so seriously & have fun? Words help with the visualization/manifestation process and describing what it is we want to actualize into the fantasy? No free will? Damn I thought free will was the real deal So follow your bliss & where your heart takes you to go with it. Follow your heart. Speak from the heart. Do what you love. Doing what you love, with people that you love, expressing creativity with love. Being your true self. Who you were made to be. Which all of this is reconnecting to self-love? -- I think a big part of self-love is reconnecting with emotions and feelings. How can you follow your feelings if you can't have self-trust because feelings were shamed? I grew up being addicted to video games so never truly had a chance to have emotional awareness because of neglect from family. Weren't too many role models that taught healthy expressions. Mostly cold distant responses. Leading to domino effect or affect with self-abandonment/self-neglect which is nearly the opposite of self-love. Creating "Autism" or "ADHD".. or "Flat Affects" when really it's all emotional numbness and blunting b/c of self-hate. The self-hate is there because of social programming. Then it goes back as far as the human condition caused this. The creation of self-deception. Which even then to go another layer is to examine the entire concept of duality and how the mind split from source. Then to go beyond duality and ego construct & self-construct which I believe that's what you're pointing to? Non-duality or no self. Just beingness. Like a heard of cows in a field doing their thing or a group of fish swimming together or clouds floating around. Which is oneness which is god which is nothingness which is beyond words. Which is just an experience or a movie? So it would be like there's a video game & you can play the campaign which is following your inner guidance system - Emotions which leads you closer to your true self or self-realization/actualization. -- Also, congratz on getting the job that you mentioned.

There are no enlightened person, and no states of bliss or pure joy. Awakening/Enlightenment is also not about transforming the inner world, even if it is a common side effect. The real problem about this forum is that the members are too invested in mental masturbation/gymnastics, or just in communicating endlessly about matters that no concept can touch and that their time will be more fruitful in just sitting silently.

Because people are being mislead about enlightenment. But enlightenment is when you let go of your need to understand infinity. For example im able to enter a stillness that I could only by accident enter for a very short time before, and it usually came after an extremely depressive mood. Now I can do it willingly, although still only for short periods of time, and do so whenever I remember to. Up until now I have been attempting to 'improve the dream' but realised that is my error, and in this stillness or awareness there is no dream, there is just awareness. Everything seems clear, and there is a sense of lightness and a subtle feeling of joy that it is similar to feelings I had in childhood. I'm more 'myself' than ever before. At the moment I bob between this level of awareness and being lost in my mind. My mind feels sharper though, and I'm more aware of my imperfections. Of course. Because we are all one . I'm you and you are me. What's left after this realization than to fall in love with each other for the rest of eternity(I mean unconditionallove not gay love ?)? If you've reached a state of pure joy and bliss, you don't need to go anywhere from there. That is the state of Brahman. The outer world won't change, but your inner world is no longer the same. You will keep coming back to the state of Brahman because it is your real identity.

6 months ago I left my home, business and everything I’ve ever known and loved to pursue my dream and purpose. After about a month my motivation and confidence started to decline and things started getting really bad. I was alone (literally - I lived in my van) for months, I old patterns of anxiety started to creep back in. Fast forward 4 months to present time and things have gotten significantly worse. I haven’t gotten a single client or made a single dollar off of my life purpose. I am completely out of money - at 36 yes old I am broke, no savings, nothing! All of my mental Illnesses are coming back full force! I have regressed to who I was 10 years ago, panicked, depressed and hopeless. I thought I did everything right - I did the work, I had the courage, I made the leap of faith - only to fall flat on my face! No one who knows me understands me or my purpose. Everyone wants me to give up, grow up and get a normal job and stop chasing dreams. My gf doesn’t trust me any longer bc I’m not confident in my pursuits any more. I’m stuck! And I mean like for real stuck! I can’t move; I sit inside all day thinking up ways to move forward and then dont take action. I feel too fucked up and depressed to do anything. I don’t have a home or know where I will stay but that’s not even enough motivation to get a job. I have a college education and am capable I’d rather die in the street than go backwards. I blow up over the smallest shit - my gf probably hates me at this point. I used to be so chill and now I’m a nervous wreck! I am mad at the world, my mentors, every self help author and my self. “Just surrender and accept bro” Go fuck yourself! I never should have started self actualizing or following my “path.” It’s way to difficult! Worst of all there’s no turning back - I’m stuck watching my depression and anxiety with full awareness. Stuck watching the disgusting world . And if you think that’s all it takes to release you of them then you’re just as stupid as I am. As someone who’s been at this work for over 7 years and tried to do the right thing - don’t! Do what everyone else is doing! Trust me you will be happier. The little moments of bliss are bullshit! They will disappear faster than our democracy is about to. The advice gurus and experts give you are WRONG! They got lucky as fuck or are trying to make a buck. I truly so hate this world and the people in it. I didn’t always but I do now. Not bc of my own situation but because I can see with eyes wide open. It’s discussing- I can’t wait for it to be over

Sounds like a great trip. Bliss, joy and love is the best feeling during or even after tripping.

(effective dose was about 80 ug of 1V LSD) There's a lot I could write about this experience. So many things happened and were experienced, it's a bit of a wild mixture. It was the first time I actually experienced "trippy" things and the mind fuck of what consciousness is and what my own mind is. At some point I started seeing patterns arise above whichever background I was looking at, the wall, the carpet, the ceiling. Certain geometries started to arise and fit themselves in the existing geometry of the background, the things started to merge and "warp". At some point I just wanted to look at my hand. So I saw my hand and the patterns on it (the hand lines, wrinkles etc.). Again new patterns or geometry was created, fitting itself within the geometry of my hand lines, creating an entirely new image that kept evolving. Then one moment later my hand kind of just disappeared. It was still there, but blended so perfectly into the background that it became practically invisible. It was like I could see through my hand. But it kept reappearing and everytime immediately new patterns were projected onto the hand (or just created there) and then it merged with the background again. This was already such a mind fuck. Just my own hand became this huge experience...it seemed to last very long. Vague faces would start to appear within the patterns of my hand, blending in, being created, being destroyed, some moment looking friendly, then neutral, then serious/evil. One minute of looking at my hand felt like almost an hour had passed. I felt like I could have walked down any of these small routes and immersed myself with it. E.g. had I chosen to put more attention on the evil looking little faces they would have become more, and more evil too. I just didn't decide to go all the way into this "little evil faces on my hand" experience. It felt like this was the beginning of insanity, just potentially though, I didn't feel insane, I also didn't feel bad or anything, but I could grasp how a certain mind might go down the route of insanity, how it could get lost in whatever kind of idea it might want to think of. Just getting more and more obsessed with something. Then my hand all of a sudden looked tiny, like the hand of a baby. It seemed like there was no more "scale", like you/I couldn't really tell how big or small things were. Just totally weird ? My room, which in reality is about 15 feet long and wide could now be several miles long and wide, or just one inch. There's no way tell. Each perception is correct but also wrong. Some time much later in the trip I looked at an image of a girl, and it all became so trippy. One moment the girl had a smile, the next instant the looked evil. Then she looked like a cute cheerleader kind of girl and then very serious. All of this just kept on moving and progressing. "Evil witch girl" => "cute innocent girl" => "girl with new face" "girl with another face" => "girl suddenly wearing different clothes" => "patterns arising around the girl but girl staying there in the center" => "serious girl" => "girl completely disappearing and merging with background patterns". "Girl staying present but growing small little devil's horns on her head and the colour of her outfit changing and warping and merging, appearing and disappearing. It was like many hundred of these small alterations were experienced, but each moment was an experience in it's own right. Each moment had the potential to become like it's own little universe, an experience to completely get lost in. ____________________________________________________________________________________________ At some point I just contemplated about different fears or insecurities. And whatever arose was just there, it was just experienced and felt the way it was. It's such a mind fuck to consciously contemplate about one of your fears and just completely, mindfully observe it. You just stare in the eye of the fear. And nothing happens, it's all ok however it is, the body feels unpleasant, so you observe the unpleasantness, which becomes an experience in it's on right. The unpleasant body sensation is just there, but it doesn't even really make sense anymore. You just observe it. "Unpleasant" has lost it's meaning. There's nothing unpleasant there, there's just experience, just sensation, just some energy, just now, the present moment however it is. The concepts like "not good enough" don't even make logical sense anymore. There's just some energy to be observed and experienced, that's all (it's hard to describe what I really mean here). And then just continuously experiencing the sensations of that fear. It's scary but also liberating. The fear loses a lot of it's power when you can observe it with so much presence. Crazy stuff... ____________________________________________________________________________________________ At another point I also experienced ecstasy, joy, Bliss and love. I had started to meditate and then later listening to inspirational instrumental music feeling into the music, feeling the love and just being grateful for existence. Being grateful for having "a life", as in a conscious experience at all. The music deepened these positive emotions of love, bliss, joy for life and became a new experience. Just imagine listening to the track I will link below (Gladiator, now we are free) and experiencing every second of it. Every 20 seconds of the track seeming like hours and hours. Feeling all the love and joy in it. All the love of whoever created this music, how they must have felt, then just being completely immersed in the music, feeling free, feeling the NOW. It seemed like the track would never end, but it was amazing like this. ____________________________________________________________________________________________ Ok, I'd say that's about it. A lot more could be told but I would keep writing forever, so let's just end it here. Have a great day! https://youtu.be/ghxzLw2wRis

Tony is referring to Jim Newman. Tony is actually a real grouch at times. Jim’s laugh is even more infectious, and he has a lot more patience. I’ve been to one of Tony’s meetings and a few people walked out. They were visibly angry and upset that Tony claimed not to have any awareness. They said it was the most ridiculous thing they’d ever heard. it almost got a little heated. On a Jim Newman retreat I had a very significant breakthrough. The final layer of the onion peeled away. My most significant breakthroughs ever were: - 6 gram blindfolded psilocybin: Total bliss / terror / fucking unfathomable depths of agonising love God awakening, completely forgot I was a human being, felt like I had gone to another dimension for a million years. Coming back was dumbfounding. Utterly life changing. - Vipassana retreat. On day 7 after 60+ hours of motionless meditation, I realised I could sit through any amount of physical pain - even pure agony - and remain totally blissed out, not needing to adjust my position in any way, because it became suddenly startlingly obvious that I was not the body. I was smiling from ear to ear after this one. - Jim Newman retreat. The complete disappearance of the subject. Can’t even get it back if I tried, as there is no me left to try. Emotionally this was nothing compared to either of the above, but it was in a strange way the most profound. The end of seeking any meaning or purpose in anything. AMA ;-)

Sounds similar to what I've experienced twice on THC (one time oil, one time a single vape hit), minus the samadhi. I didn't let go, I just used music to try and hold on and ride the waves. 95% waves of anxiety and terror, 5% pure bliss and maybe a slight hint at no-self. About 6 hours of just trying to hold onto reality until I could finally sleep it off. I thought maybe it was just since I did concentrated THC. So I've been considering trying actual marijuana to see if I handle it any better. But if you got that fucked up on the actual plant then I'm gonna pass hahaha. Also if weed hits me this hard, I'm terrified to ever try mushrooms or DMT now. I don't get how anyone can do weed recreational and just sit on the couch relaxed and laughing. Although with both THC oil and vaping THC, there were multiple times where I took it and nothing happened before my blastoff experiences. Then I took a similar dose and it messed me up bigly. So I kind of have a theory that it builds up on my cannabinoid receptors or w/e and then all gets released at once when I hit a certain threshold. No idea if there's any truth or science to that though.

Just wanted to share my experience of going to a talk of sadhgurus tonight in LA. I never seen him in person until today. My logical mind has always doubted in some way the pranic energy and so fourth and today i got a heavy reality check. The talk was great but the part that really through me off was the meditation part. I had always heard in videos people shouting and crying and what not. Im a pretty serious person and was just expecting a little peace from the meditation at most....wrong. When sadhguru began to chant and hit certain notes I felt my hands supercharged with a very powerful electric/static/numb sensation. Similar to when your foot falls asleep and its a very intense energy. I lost control of the body and I cried hysterically while my breathing took on its own sputtering rhythm. My body naturally wanted to curl to the fetal position. Legs flapping about hitting the people next to me. As for my mind, I was totally at ease, this didnt really come with any emotions or bliss id say. I was very detatched and could only watch this happen with no say in what would come. I managed to bring my spine back to an upright position but as the chant continued my body just crumpled like a can and I cried. Needless to say, very strange to go through with no attachment or seeming involvement. Im very glad I now know this energy is a thing and look forward to delving into it. Why do u guys think sadhguru does this energy amplification to us? To show us the possibility? Most people there didnt seem too seriously on the path. Let me know if any of youve had similar experiences in general or explanations to this.

Hehe ? It would not really matter, wouldn't it? Suppose all cats are enlightened or can gain enlightenment, then what? They speak cat language and we find that hard to comprehend. We understand only the basics and the clear signs. It would not help us in any way. So maybe a cat can achieve cat enlightenment. Also animals tend to have a quit mind relative to humans .A mind that is quiet, not attached to the past, or to projections of the future from the past can see the present moment as it is without the domination of the past experiences. If it sees someone is crying then it will attempt to comfort them if it’s possible, if it sees someone is yelling at them it will try to learn why without any desire to escape or transcend the situation. If it feels it is doing something that is not helpful, it will stop doing it. When there is no personal agenda attached to a situation, the situation is seen in its entirety and not from a limited motive, that is the small difference in seeing between human minds and animal minds. But you are right in that it lacks the conceptual understanding ..but does it really matter? Do you prefer to have peace of mind and inner bliss for the rest of your life or to gain a complete conceptual understanding of all reality? Think about it deeply .its no easy question.

This is pretty shocking, atheist is one of the lowest levels of consciousness than comes religion than spirituality than consciousness research/practices etc. I was selling a product and noticed her husband displaying lower levels of cognitive empathy, searched him up and found he was married to a psychiatrist/psychologist. Usually couples in a relationship display similar levels of consciousness, so this is pretty big. I remember when i was talking to a clinical psychologist in real life to pass an exam , i was shown precognitive picture regarding her own level of consciousness and it was a bit higher then average which was pretty shocking, after the interview she was in bliss and in shock because i did some miracles operating at the highest level of consciousness i has ever been naturally. That's why i told a while ago, the teachings for psychologists etc. are still based on materialism alot and not the mind. They use alot of materialistic/psychological base definitions and so on when they don't really understand the bigger picture.

I think meditation is just about realizing you are not your mind. That’s it. If you wish to go further in your awakening work you have to raise your consciousness . Meditation just helps you realize that You are not all those thoughts, commands, judgments and noise running through your mind, not that nagging, narrating, psychologically assessing voice in your head. You are the Awareness of that voice, and all thoughts. And since You are only Awareness, which has no thoughts, just beingness & observation, the true You is always still, silent, and resting in a peace that passeth all understanding, pure bliss. Watching all that noise. While knowing It is not that noise. Imagine the freedom! Even if you never ‘progress’ any further (to samadhi, self-realization, ‘enlightenment,’ whatever)

The world has been at war since the Middle Ages. Back then it was called the Crusades, these days it is called the war against terror. As we all know this has been a very brutal and expensive war. There has never been a single name for this war, it flares up from time to time with individual names, but since it is because of belief systems, let's call it, "The Belief System War." Most belief systems are religions. Religions provide reasons for our existence and for our morality. They are all based on faith because they can't be proven to be true. We also have atheism (or nihilism) which is considered to be a belief system even though it is not actually a system. Therefore, what we have are belief systems that are not actually provable and a belief non-system. As time goes on the differences between these ideas are what cause "The Belief System War." So I have a question. First ,when does spirituality turn into a religion? And why does religion which is supposed to be aiming for unity and peace and equality turns out to be the biggest cause of war in the world ? Religion was not meant to fight, it is to create way to love, to heal, to help society, to create joy. And if a person calling himself/herself as religious person is not heading into the direction of bliss and is burning with anger or hatred then I am sorry to say to such a person ..Sorry my dear friend, you have created a war in name of someone who only gave love to this world. Period.

@digitalkaine The happiness I'm speaking about is harder to come by. It's more like the bliss of one's nature. Consider Ramana Maharshi: after a powerful enlightenment, he'd blissfully sat for days on end while inspects bit his legs. He was living on a cave and barely ate and slept. That's extreme but it might also clarify where to look for this elusive satisfaction. Become conscious of who and what you are. Maybe bliss and your nature aren't separate. Who knows? Remember that being happy doesn't entail being complacent, lazy, poor, ascetic, self-indulgent, or stuck within circumstances -- it is independent of those. You can be happy and ambitious. Practice being happy even if you don't like your experience, regardless of what it is. This principle forces you to make a shift in your experience from being at the effect vs being in control of your disposition. Contemplate it.

This is an incomplete list of things that you can realize. It includes facets of truth and things that I have personally realized. This is not complete because I Have not yet probably realized every facet of God. All of these things are something you can awaken to. The list is not in any order of importance, I just wrote what came to my mind spontaneously. Many of these realizations are very radical and can break your understanding of reality completely. Love is real Love is truth Everything is Absolute Truth God is real You are God God-Realization God is consciousness, reality is consciousness, there is only consciousness Consciousness = Love = Reality = Imagination = Experience = God = You Other = self There is no other God is Love Absolute Goodness, God is Good Infinite Beauty Infinite Intelligence Your mind is Infinite, an infinitely intelligent Reality is your mind Everything is intelligent, even walls, machines, rocks, plants, words, music, and everything in your experience Everything is alive, including all listed above There is only qualia There is nothing but direct experience, if you did not experience something it literally did not happen Absolute Solipsism, nobody else has consciousness, they are fragments of your own consciousness There are no differences between anything Nonduality and all the ramifications of it Oneness God has infinite and perfect understanding of everything Death is not real, you are immortal I AM Infinite and Absolute Power Absolute Will Absolute Infinity Your senses in "your" body are not generating sounds, sights or so on. They appear directly in consciousness. "You" do not have a face. Everything is your desire, you are desire itself Reality is absolute bliss Everything is playful, nothing is serious. The cosmic joke You cannot be hurt in any way You are omniscient, omnipresent, omnibenevolent, and omnipotent Truth is God, Consciousness, and Love Absolute Nothingness, this is nothing, this is emptiness. Everything = Nothing, Nothing = Everything, Something = Nothing Everything is mind, there is no matter or physical objects Reality is infinite imagination, everything is imaginary Protons, atoms, cells, etc do not exist, there is only direct qualia! There is nothing behind your direct experience You are constructing and imagining every aspect of you direct experience right now, none of the experience gets "carried over" from the past, you are imagining every aspect right now. Reality is an infinite mystery, completely mystical, completely Love is not an emotion or a feeling, it is the literally everything, but realizing love gives you the emotions of love too. History does not exist, Hitler never existed. Nobody in the world actually suffers, except for you. The whole universe did not exist before "you" were born. You imagined the universe at the time you decided to start playing in it as a human. Nobody in the world will be left once you die, because you are the only one here. The universe cannot exist if you are not "alive" in it. Nobody else has had an awakening, nobody else than you can be awake. Reality is infinitely better than you think. Reality is a real illusion, it is real but the contents are illusions. Reality is a dream. Being You are Being, this is Being The meaning of life (find it out yourself ) Magic powers are real, paranormal activity exists Reality is groundless, there is no ground for anything. Absolute Sovereignty, you are Sovereign God is an infinite orgasm, that is why you are called an organism! Everything is self-designed, you designed the universe God loves you totally Infinite unconditional Love Everything is a state of consciousness Unconsciousness does not exist You have absolute control Absolute Perfection, everything is perfect, there are no mistakes Everything is infinite, there are no finite things Your experience (Aka You) has infinite resolution, it has infinite depth Reality is an infinite fractal, everything contains everything else (Jijimuge) Reality is a strange loop Consciousness has always existed There is no time, only the present moment, which is eternal Every moment is eternal God dreams the same dreams an infinite number of times, every scenario will be "repeated" infinitely God dreams an infinite number of variety of dreams Every dream is crafted with infinite intelligence Ego does not exist, God only masquerades as the ego, while having infinite power There is only God! There is an infinite amount of qualia, there are infinite spatial dimensions, infinite possible senses infinite colors, infinite sounds, infinite forms, infinite everything You can zoom infinitely into anything, in or out, forward or backward There are an infinite number of dimensions similar to ín/out or forward/backward God is formless, but formless is also form Emptiness = Form, Form = Emptiness Everything is beautiful, you are beautiful God is absolute unity, absolutely unified Everything is infinitely interconnected, consciousness itself is omniscient God is infinite creativity, it wants to create and experience Consciousness can do anything Everything is possible God can and will create infinite number of things on the same order as time, space, emotions, senses, and so on that do not exist in this dream, but will exist in your other dreams. Evil, sin, hell, and so on, do not exist. Nobody has ever died. There is a total and absolute awakening. When "you" are dead, you will be in an omnipotent and omniscient state with absolutely no suffering. You will be in states without a body, because consciousness existed always, before your body. You imagined your body, your memory, and your abilities. The past has absolutely no effect on the present moment because the past does not exist. The future does not exist. You are not anywhere, not in any location. Most importantly: You are God! Feel free to add more to this list if you have realized things that are not included in this list. I especially think there are facets missing from this list that could be very important, that did not come to my mind. I think this list has some very radical content in it that many people have not yet realized.

Yes. What helped me here, since its always a question of definition (for example of the Supreme Witness): You are that which is aware. And the Totality of Reality itself, since it can only show up in that which is aware. But the Totality of Reality is often only seen as that which appears (The appearance side). And that can totally disappear (Deep Sleep), and the real you is still there, unaware of itself, but with a latent capacity for sentience if something appears again (the emptiness or consciousness/aware side). So the question is: How "empty" is the Supreme Witness. When it is so empty that no arisings/feeling (very subtle I-feelings/I-thoughts) arise and appear in the Totality (call it Reality, Infinite Consciousness, God, Dharmakaya, whatever you want), or you clearly see them all as objects/arisings/movements within you, then what you realize yourself to be very obviously is the Totality/Reality/Infinite Consciousness,... . The stage before that is the Supreme Witness, or Empty Witness: Ken Wilber calls that the Empty Witness: Personality, and especially time and space are already transcended, "you" feel the infinite reality as mere appearance, timeless. And always here. But there are still some clusters of sensations arising IN YOU that feel like individuality, or that you are not the unbounded whole, but a feeling of watching it appears in you. You are not all of it, the sensation of "other" still arise a lot in daily life, you dont feel that you what looks from all eyes is the same consciousness that gets clouded by feelings/thoughts of I/me, exactly like how it used to get clouded in you. The realization is neither stable, nor complete. And then at some point you realize that (learn to spot) these arisings/feelings/building blocks of the Supreme Witness or Empty Witness are still left and arising/moving in you. You learn to spot them in a sort of High-Speed-Analysis, recognize them as arisings/objects appearing within you, and you can stop them immediately (subject->object), or just watch them. Then they drop, the Empty Witness drops, and the real you stays. But that is described by some as impersonal, a formulation that I am not totally happy with. Yes, its impersonal, its not the you you thought you were, but its the real you. And that real you "has" or "contains" the personal you moving in it. Then that boosts the nondual state, makes the whole world appear just as mere appearance, an imagined illusion, infinite, groundless, a mirage happening within you (that also starts before, but gets boosted a lot the more the Empty Witness drops). Pretty much a state that Psychedelics cause, but sobre. And with it comes happiness and bliss independend of what happens at that moment, which is the most beautiful aspect of it. If you dont have nonduality and nonseparation and are not aware of the Ground of Being in normal life (while not meditating or tripping), these very subtle arisings/I-feelings/I-thoughts still arise in you and are not spotted with high enough speed to see them for what they are: Sensations of separation arising within the real you. In my experience, you can not force real Nonduality/mere appearance of the totality/world, its an energetic state that gets influenced "indirectly" over how fast you spot these I-thoughts/I-feelings. Here I am fully in line when Leo says you need the right state (of enought nonduality, illusion-like mere appearance of the world, directly feeling it all as mere empty consciousness appearance mirage-arising). When you spot these subtle arisings (building blocks of the separate self and even Empty Witness) fast enough, they arise in you. But you can't force it with willpower, that would be what Daniel Brown in Pointing out the Great Way calls "artifical activity" during the stage of Nonmeditation Yoga (last stage of the 4 Mahamudra stages). It becomes automatic once you understand it at that stage. Its one of the Illusion-Mechanism of Maya that you can't force your way through it with willpower, but you can do it indirectly with understanding how to rest in your true nature. The energetic state of nonduality follows. Its some kind of positive feedback loop, sloping "upwards" if done correctly. I agree with Leo that Nonduality (which ripens) is in its early stages not realization of Ultimate Reality. Daniel Brown for example also. But realization of Ultimate Reality has to be nondual, since its a unity and infinite. And this development can pretty easily stagnate (especially before nonduality even begins to start), and stop if you do something incorrect, or understand something incorrect. Which pretty much happens with 99% of Buddhists. So the separate you disappears, but the real you as Awareness AND the Reality/World stays. So the Illusion-You disappears, but the real you is of course, as always, there. It can not "not be there". That is the Unborn, Reality itself. The real you. And in that area/stage definitions of different authors and traditions get very slippery, since these "feelings" of the Supreme Witness (as you intuit) are very very subtle, and its very easy to identify with them and not notice it. Over the years, I ended up with a metaphor for myself: Zen is like axe to cut a tree. Very robust, works if you do it long enough hard enough pretty foolproof, doesnt need a lot complex theory/stages, but normally takes a long time and is not so pleasant (and in practice for most doesnt deliver the final results, because it takes extreme willpower). More sophisticated versions of Buddhism, with a more detailed map, like Mahamudra/Dzogchen (see for example Brown, Pointing out the Great Way), are like a Forest Harvester: If used correctly very fast, quite pleasant (for the user, probably not for the forest) and comfortable along the path, but quite hard to understand and learn, since language is so slippery in these areas. Like if you want to use a Forest Harvester, and if you dont get explained how it works (like put gas in it, how to drive it, its controls), delivers no result at all. Zen = robust, sit long enough with a Koan and you get it, not much to misunderstand, but neither very fast nor pleasant Mahamudra/Dzogchen = very sophisticated with techniques and details and pointing out descriptions for every stage, but if used incorrectly (like not putting as into forest harvester) no result at all even if you do it a long time. Some Material for that stage I found useful: 1) Massaro, Spiritual Conversations with a Skeptic: "Imagine a formless, space-like void that's indestructible, sentient, awake, alive and aware, but has no form. You could almost say it has no self awareness. It just is. Russell: So wait... A void? A vacuum? Nothing? Bentinho: Yes. Just imagine it. Russell: OK, go ahead. Bentinho: The point of the analogy is that there is no object. Imagine infinite space with no stars or planets. Suddenly, you introduce a toy; let's say a water pistol. Or it could be a body even. But let's say... Russell: An object. Bentinho: Yeah, an object. A water pistol. Russell: With water in it. Bentinho: Maybe with Coca-Cola in it. Russell: With Coca-Cola in it. OK. Bentinho: Ah! Now there is something. Something is created. First there is this space, which is like the pure subject with no reference points. It's like space, but it's not actually space. Russell: Wait... where am I in relation to this infinite space? Bentinho: You are it. Russell: I am it? Bentinho: Yes. Russell: OK. But there is nothing in it at first. Bentinho: Correct. There is nothing in it at all; there is just Infinity. Russell: But I am in it. Bentinho: You are it. " 2) How other perspectives/beings work: A Human is aware of only his perspective (normally). But Infinite Consciousness can forget in time (what did you do exactly one year ago), or to be more precice NOT imagine that memory, and it can forget in space (metaphor of Francis Lucille). To get an idea watch the cover of this book of Marc Leavitt. Notice the hyperbolic geometry of the awareness fields shown. Reality is made of perspectives (Ken Wilber, Concept of Indras Net). Reality is a giant mind (Leo, and more or less all traditions). https://www.amazon.com/Enlightenment-Behind-Scenes-Marc-Leavitt/dp/1495398218 3) How to Approach Phenomenal Consciousness, Jac O'keeffe. She calls Ultimate Reality Totality Primary Consciousness "the fundamental primary phenomenal consciousness (her name for Ultimate Reality, Infinite Consciousness, the real you), it has a capacity. It doesn't even know itself here. However, it has a capacity to show up with a sense of emptiness (a subtle arising feeling/perception happening in you). To show up as one. To show up as a one who can reflect on itself and recognize that it is, and we have the concept of existence. And it can go from that sense of vast spaciousness and that unified field into time, which appears as a dot. " "We're left with consciousness (-> Primary Consciousness) that cannot know itself. It's such a fundamental that it actually can't know itself. However, it is known. You can drop back there and it is known, but you can't bring yourself there or your capacities to know it. It's almost like it's so fundamental that it can't turn around and see itself. It doesn't see itself. That's too much movement (arisings, objects, subtle I-feelings/I-thoughts, not fully empty/infinite). That's movement such as space, time and identification and me, myself, I, and the building of my movie that happens" Here she describes how Primary Consciousness is so empty that it cant turn around to see itself. Because that turning around would already be a movement, a arising, a subtle object within Primary consciousness/Real you. 4) Stephen Wolinsky, or how Empty is your Empty Witness or Supreme Witness: from Wolinsky, Nothing Comes From Nothing " Knowing or being aware of or consciousness of who you are is “one step” away from being who you are. This is why the Buddha said, “You might not necessarily be aware of your own enlightenment. Why? Because there is no aware-er or awareness or knower or knowingness, to be aware of or know or know about or be conscious of the Absolute. And why Lakshamann Joo said, “Whenever you perceive something, you perceive it from one level lower.” (remark: You can never see the Absolute Reality/Consciousness, cause looking or searching for it is a movement of attention WITHIN IT. But you can understand it, be it, intuit it, from one level lower. The Supreme Witness is one of the last movements IN YOU/Reality looking for absolute consciousness, inducing an experience of it, which of course is not it because it is you). Paradoxically As the Absolute there is no Absolute If the “I” or “you” “has an “experience” and believes it IS consciousness awareness infinite potential presence or that it IS an “imagined” infinity, then the “I” or “you” mistakenly assumes and projects that experience upon the Absolute. Once that occurs the “I” or “you” then completely believes and ergo experiences that the Absolute also has or IS the experience of consciousness has or IS the experience of awareness has or IS the experience of infinite potential has or IS the experience of presence has or IS the experience of an “imagined” infinite. Consciousness awareness infinite potential presence or an “imagined” infinite are the most subtle of the most subtle states and veils which give the illusion of awareness, the illusion of consciousness the illusion of presence and the illusion of both beingness and being conscious. This “experiential belief” of consciousness awareness infinite potential presence or an “imagined” infinite or “infinity, is an anthropomorphically projected experience of consciousness awareness infinite potential presence or an “imagined” infinite or “infinity. Thus giving the illusionary experience of awareness, the illusionary experience of consciousness the illusionary experience of presence and the illusionary experience of both beingness and being conscious. Which are then Superimposed on the Absolute Nothingness. Simply stated, the experience of consciousness awareness infinite potential presence or an “imagined” infinite or “infinity is an experience. This experience gives the illusion of a beingness, isness or existence to these temporary subtle veils and experiences which are made of nothing. The Absolute is without the Absolute Nothingness " 5) Prior to Nonduality Youtube-Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC9vlZGtpdFIts8GOG5vu27g Mechanisms of Creation/Imagination/Manifestation: Its important and nice to find out HOW you imagine this world with all of its infinite mechanism. And the first and fundamental mechanisms on how imagination/manifestation (in any universe/dimension) can occur can be understood (for example how the fundamental archetypes of space and time (giving "objects" or appearances that change in time), and the first "movements" (even if they are formless) of appearances in consciousness are spawned out from the Infinite Consciousness/Reality. That is for example described by Ken Wilber as the manifestation of the first Archetypes at the causal stage (he calls it low causal, while high causal being the empty ultimate Godhead). But since Reality/Spirit/God is able to manifest/imagine infinite Worlds, with totally different mechanism than our universe for example, by definition one will never be able to understand all of their mechanisms, since you dont have access to all Realities (and you couldnt while being human). And you can never explore all of them, by definition of what Infinity means. That is what God/Reality itself is exploring. Leo mentioned that in "Outrageous Experiments In Consciousness - 30 Awakenings In 30 Days.", there are infinite dimensions of awakening. Which is, as mentioned, quite shocking. But for sure its nice and important to grasp the fundamental mechanism of imagination/manifestation, which apply to all universes/dimensions (since all are appearances), and understanding that in your deepest being you are that one Reality. I believe these fundamentals are important to understand and realize and experience. Else "you" are stuck with believing experiencing Nonduality or Emptiness is it, while that is only the start to realize Infinity. And you can of course realize the Groud of Being, your true nature. But one can never explore all mechanism of manifestation, since a human in its limited time can never explore all realms of manifestation (and there are for examples according to Jac O'Keffee and Stephen Wolinsky some truly alien realms that are not build with the building blocks of this Universe. Yet they are also only appearances). So at some level one either says "Its details, and one can never explore all mechanism of manifestation, because even for God/Absolute Reality there are Infinite Realms of Appearances/Worls/Universes to explore", or it is a grasping for seeing as much as possible. Which is a high level recipe for nevery finding the constant peace/happiness independend of outer circumstances, the hallmark of the enlightened ones, and also nevery fully resting it. Maya is awe-inspiring, and her Illusion-Mechanisms (which are necessary for this Lila) go to the highest level also. But understanding the fundamental mechanism of how manifestation/imagination occurs, how you fool yourself (Maya), what ultimate Reality/God/Spirit is, what other is, how Maya works, what one really is and how one imagines otherwise, that is all essential. And of course humanity will go exploring all of that (manifestation/imagination mechanisms, mechanisms of Maya, "going Psychonaut" and exploring it, exploring Ken Wilbers subtle and low causal realms and mapping them. He even said in the next 1000 years probably many new substages will show up and getting formed & described during exploration). This understanding will grow. Buddhism has evolved in the past, there is not even one Buddhism, there are many different streams, some more developed/sophisticated/efficient than others. I don't think Buddhism will disappear, so it will change and evolve by definition. Buddhism happens in Infinity, not the other way round. And to conclude: I hope this is interesting and helpful for some of you. It took me a long time to understand why there are so many, often contradicting statements in the spiritual traditions/teachers/psychonautic explorers, and how Reality is structured (and the differing perspectives & statements it supports and brings forth on various stages/states) to enable and support all of these differing perspectives, experiences and viewpoints. For sure, this picture isn't complete, but at least for me tells a story that for me is sufficient to continue my practice in peace and enjoy what it brings into my life, be able to sort all these often conflicting messages in a large and hopefully integral perspective, and stay interested in how Reality is structured that all of that can appear in it (the psychonaut approach). And of course its nearly impossible to communicate all of that in language. In case anybody has read all of the above until here: A metaphor that, if I remember correctly, also Ken Wilber once used: Zen would deliver the much more precise summary, which is why I also like Zen a lot: The old pond, A frog jumps in: Plop! Matsuo Basho (1644-1694)

I'm only supposing that I may have a clue about what you are referring to. When a human says "everything," it is always a human's conception of "everything". Like with Infinity. Our human conceptions, nothing else. But it is possible as you have broken through or expanded out of boundaries of human experience, even in a multidimensional sense, you have reached the realization that is not comprehensible for human capacity. Anyway, the Buddhist approach is most welcome among some modern scientists and philosophers of the mind, as it reaches the point of ceasing even consciousness in ordinary meaning. Even some materialists are OK with this statement, in significant simplification, of course. Almost every scientist working on the hard problem of consciousness is sure that during the deep sleep phase, there is no sign of activity of consciousness. There's a brilliant discussion between Rupert Spira, Bernardo Kastrup, and Christopher Koch on this subject: I have found a way to realize Supreme Witness through lucid dreaming. Remaining in the so-called waking state, you are trying to catch this moment of switching/entering the so-called dream reality using deep breathing techniques. When you master this to some extent, you enter a "dream scenario" with more and more expressive outlines. You may visit the same place, meet the same beings, entities dream after dream. Actually, you are not resting but keep on playing a character in a different dimension. There is still activity, sometimes even more extensive than in a waking state. But then, suddenly, everything is dropped into some void, which is not a void. It's full of bliss. Then "you" rest properly. I was trying to catch this moment from inside a dream, but it's one paradoxical strange loop, like a wave trying to catch an ocean. Hilarious experience, anyway. I have found that dropping this activity is much more challenging in a waking state, so you need to tune into a meditative state. And so I drifted in digressions; forgive me.

LEO changed my whole LIFE it all started with one afternoon. i had just a little curiosity about what is reality. i thought that reality is might not be as it apears to be. so i just went on searching in youtube "what is reality". thats when i come in contact with leos video titled as "what is reality" . i just watched his video in awe. i couldnt digest what he is saying. because i never heard anything like this before, but i had this intuition in me. its so radical. it shook me at my core. i really greatful watching that video until today. and i had nothing to do with my life in particularly. i was 22 and i was following a course. and i had more time. so i watched his videos as many as possible. i was getting exsited, and amazed what he is saying in each video. these are some videos that mostly changed me "what is reality" "self bias" most effected video so far is "open mindedness" "what is truth" "what is conciousness" "how to discover what is true" "actuality" "recontexualization" "contemplation" all most every video i watched. i took everything so literally. it broke my mind. it broke my worldview, and everything i beleive. i didnt took anything as truth after that. i remember watching tv with my mom and asking what is tv. ? i saw everything as a question. i was also contemplating at that time. as i was watching these videos, i was came in contact with this particular video where leo explains the self i considered to be me is just a negative space carved by its surrounding. i couldnt watch this video. when i was in half way through in this video, i just had to stop the video. i had this very strange feeling in the body mixed with great sense of fear of non existence. and i stopped the video and went for a walk, and finished the video after. something phenominal happened that day. it felt like some part of me died. and i was intuitive that i am not who i thought i was. but i didnt know who i was. in one video, leo mentions a technique called "neti neti" technique. so i searched for it. and i watched it with open mind. but nothing happened. i just kept watching that video again and again to find out who i was. but nothing happened. and i end up in frustration, anger, hopelessness. and i just wanted to stop all this thing with truth seeking and focus on my life. so i decided to stop all this, after giving it a one last chance. so i took a pen and paper, and sat down with the frustration. this time i didnt took anything from anyone. i just contemplated my experience. i didnt took leos word for it. i just asked who i am and explored my experience.. and in one point, i just realized that i am not my body, mind, or whatever i thought myself to be. but i am the experiencer. and it just occured to me that, if this experiencer is not present, then there wont be anything. and with that realisation, my mind and body went crazy. i literally felt like i was dying. im not over exaggerating this. it literally felt like i was dying physically. my body is vibrating like crazy. my heart pounding. i was alone at home. my personal self disappeared. and i was shivering, and vibrating. that experience lasted for half an hour and gradually went away. and i was left with this beutiful sensations in the body and crystal clear mind. its like you went most rush and noizy city from complete silent sound proof room. man, there is nothing in this world that i can compare with that experience. its so beutiful, so profound, i just cried like a child for how long i dont know. there is no other word that i can call it other that "BLISS". after all that, i went to sleep that day, and i was never slept. i can sense that my body is sleeping. but i was fully awake. i was totally aware of my surroundings. i didnt wanted sleep so much, because this experience is so beutiful and satisfying. i woke up early in the morning to meditate. but there is no any tiredness or anything like that. everything is just so easy. and i went for a walk. everything is vibrating with bliss. and i listened to a song, that felt like im in heaven. i never had that experience before when i listening to songs. this experience happened two years ago. and my life completely changed after that experience.but that experience lasted only for a week. and went away. but my understanding in the mind never went away. only the bodily feeling went away. understanding remained. i had my second experience when i was noticing this awareness, while watching rupert spira's video about awareness has no inside or outside. i deeply explored that with my experience. and i just felt like i was everywhere. i literally felt it. i was everything and everyone, not as a idea, but experiatialy i knew it. i was my mother, my father, my sister, and i was leo too. that experience took me more deeper. and i remebered the leos videos about this. and i said to myself "this is what he says again and again. finally it happened. it is real." i wanted to write this long time ago. but never had the chance.The one thing that leos videos different from others is, he explains everything with in very details, so anyone can uderstand what he is talking about. even he stumbled upon his videos for first time. he has a unique way of teaching. All i wanted to say is, to say big thanks to leo.. a.k.a "ME". i am so greateful for finding his teaching. and i couldnt beleive this free and people are not interested in this. thank you man. keep doing your brilliant work to awoke people from this dream.