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I once had such an intense DMT trip that my friend in the same room felt it. He fell into a kind of trance, and when I came back eh also snapped out of it and said "Dude what did you just do?" According to him there were waves of energy and bliss pouring off of me and he couldn't do anything except sit and pray and receive it. Also: https://youtu.be/HzcA-bcR4LI

I don't know completely. The passage about involuntary bliss in that book is very interesting. And the individuality of the character makes perfect sense to me. He is very funny; I love the tightrope walk where the clown murders the acrobat. But there's something sad about it all because Nietzsche must have been a very miserable person, being so alone philosophically "profoundly" in the time and place he was at, likely nobody understanding his ideas as clearly as himself and him suffering from severe health issues. He said in that book Jesus was immature and would have needed more time alive to reach proper clarity, so it makes me wonder what Nietzsche would have ended up as if he survived. Leo's issues with health also would correlate with Nietzsche's, though Nietzsche's was worse, it seems. And Leo hasn't gone insane and institutionalized yet! Or rather, he's just a freely roaming insane person in Las Vegas! Aurobindo is my favorite philosopher.

@Breakingthewall The thing that frightens me most is "infinite bliss" or eternal love etc. It struck me the other day, and it caused great distress... I don't want to be in infinite bliss, I want to be here. When people have notions of a heaven where they're walking around clouds with dead relatives, "eternity" sounds quite alright. But when considered in this context, truly frightening... "No infinite love! No! Stay away from me infinite love! I want to be a character! I don't want your love!"

Last night at 7:20pm I insufflated 5mg of 5-MeO-MALT. All of the electricity in my home was turned off, and the living room was bathed in the hushed tones and glow of dusk. Intended as a small handshake dose, I am thankful to say that this was a beautiful experience. Here are my raw notes: [7:20 PM] 5 mg 5-MeO-MALT intranasal [7:29 PM] I can feel the weight and warmth of tryptamine, along with the slight bitterness of the chemical in my sinus. The room is very still and peaceful in the evening light [7:37 PM] Gentle but distinct tryptamine energy. Slight shivering, pupils dilated, feeling deeply at peace I've moved from the couch to futons on the floor [7:39 PM] Just beautiful [7:41 PM] God is napping on the shore of its own infinite mind Infinite creation Pure infinite love, forever [7:43 PM] Zero visuals Just shivering bliss [7:46 PM] Dozing and gazing Stretching [7:49 PM] Some downloads about polarity Seeking/entering [7:50 PM] Love is just welcoming the moment [7:54 PM] Creation asks that you trust it enough to trust yourself To go all in [8:04 PM] Got up to pee with no trouble getting about Light very pleasant body load [8:05 PM] I spent some time mirror gazing, which is the only place where visuals manifest. [8:09 PM] If I trusted my hand enough to weigh out the truly miniscule dose I would consider pushing it But this is a beautiful, beautiful first meeting It's so clean and pure Dare I say innocent "Nothing else to do." Vibes [8:12 PM] I've just been laying on the floor listening to the sounds of creation all around me and inside me There's never been a hair out of place I am so grateful to have been introduced to this substance. The body load was light and very pleasurable, and there were almost no visuals. The peak effects lasted for under an hour, and by 2 hours there was only a mild afterglow. This was a deeply rewarding and encouraging first encounter. I already look forward to the next, where I'll go up to 8 mg.

You can look from that perspective and say that the internal is the key to happiness. When the internal is strong enough, the external doesn't matter. But in order to make the internal strong in the first place, and to maintain it strong, the external does matter. And as I've already said, you can also see it from the opposite perspective: That the external is key. When the external is strong enough, the internal doesn't matter. A strong enough external can cause bliss regardless of your bad internal state (judgements, perspectives, biases, neurosis). For example by taking heroin. Now you can say that the bliss from an enlightened mind is better than the bliss from heroin. But: that judgment is relative that difference in quality of bliss depends on the rules of the current reality/dream. In a different reality, it might be switched. In such a reality, people might get the enlightened bliss from taking heroin, and get the shallow bliss from being a Buddha. But even within our reality it can be considered relative. I guess most people would consider the bliss from relationships to be better and higher quality than the bliss from a still and accepting mind) (I use taking heroin as an example to better illustrate. But in the category of "external" also belong things most people consider valuable and fulfilling, like romantic relationships, sex, friends, traveling...) I'm not saying either internal or external is key. I'm saying both are key. And depending on one's specific situation one is more important to focus on.

A hard-core spiritual seeker wants to become more and more awake. Eventually mahasamadhi happens, the physical body dies, the whole dream dissolves and you merge with Infinite Love/God. But most people like the human life too. So they naturally combine the enlightened state and human state. Relative to humans, enlightenment has benefits and downsides. And human consciousness too has its benefits and downsides. That means, the prefered state for most people is to leave out the downsides of both states and to take the benefits of both states and thus create a new state, the post awakening state. Pre awakening state: human consciousness Awakening state: enlightened/god consciousness Post awakening state: the best of both All enlightened people already live in a post awakening state, because it is impossible to survive in an awakened state without any human biases. This post is about achieving a great post awakening state. - Benefits of the Human State Relative to most people's opinions, these are the benefits of human consciousness: Identifying as a seperate self. Which is made of stuff like energy, personality, sense of self,... and has a body and mind control over body and thoughts Free will Preferences Enjoying duality (Relative to human consciousness all of that is real and true) - Benefits of the Enlightened State You are Consciousness and independent of appearances. Detachment Peace Oneness Love and Bliss Understanding of Reality and wisdom - Reconciling the Identity of both States Here I wrote about the seperate self vs non-dual self: The post awakening state is essentially a dual identity of both the seperate self (stage 2 in that post) and the enlightened self (stage 4) simultaneously. That means you are conscious that you are a seperate self and you can control and optimize that life. And you are also conscious that the seperate self is an illusion and what you actually are is Consciousness/Emptiness/Love/God (,what you are relative to a high state of consciousness). And that you are in Oneness with everything. There are 2 kinds of no-self: Being conscious how the seperate self is an illusion (that's the no-self awareness that is compatible with life post awakening) Actually dissolving the seperate self. The more you do it, the more difficult it will become to survive, and eventually that seperate self completely dissolves (at that point the physical body is dead). - How to attain a High Baseline Enlightened State I conceptualize the enlightened state to have 2 main components, the void dimension and pure consciousness dimension: Practices that are most powerful to increase your baseline pure consciousness dimension: Self inquiry RASA or light transmissions Psychedelics Intense energetic practices (transmissions, invocations , and to a lesser extend kriya yoga) Hard-core concentration A high pure consciousness dimension primarily results in wisdom, understanding, enlightened awareness,... Practices that are most powerful to increase your baseline void dimension: Practicing Sleep Yoga (=conscious during sleep) (and to a lesser extend trance practices too) SAT transmissions Intense energetic practices (transmissions, invocations, kriya yoga) A high void dimension primarily results in peace, surrender, flow state, intensifying the enlightened state,... And if you want to increase your baseline magnitude dimension then the only realistic practice is doing advanced invocations. - How to not lose identity with the seperate self: Realize that the identity of the seperate self is true relative to human consciousness Realize that it is necessary to keep that identity in order to survive and enjoy life. See it as a game and pretend being a human Having a strong will Having a strong intention to maintain the seperate self and its preferences no matter what In case you are very serious then you can do the energetic practices in John Kreiter's Magnum Opus book. The seperate self is partly made of energy. The more energy the stronger that self (stronger in a way that it doesn't neccesarily contradict non-dual awareness), and these energetic practices increase the energy of the seperate self. Practicing all day awareness/presence can also strengthen the seperate self - Bias vs no Bias In the enlightened state you have no biases. Relative to that state, this is good. But relative to the human state this is bad. Because having no biases/preferences means that you for example don't care whether you die and whether people are murdered. Pure enlightenment doesn't make humans more ethical, it actually makes them less ethical. In order to become more ethical you need to combine the enlightened state with the human state. To be ethical you need situational understanding and empathy, for that the human state is required. And the enlightened state can also contribute to making you a better person (awareness of Oneness, Love, no-self,...). Also, when you are unbiased you also are no longer biased towards being unbiased, therefore you will eventually leave this unbiased state again. You are unbiased so you accept and love everything, all of Infinity, including hell realms. Nirvana can end suffering temporarily, but it is not a permanent solution because eventually you start that whole cycle again and again. The solution is to maintain your human biases/preferences. By maintaining your human preferences you are biased against the unbiased state and against bad things. That is foundational to ensure goodness for you and others. - Love and Bliss How to increase Love and Bliss Love awakenings SHAKTIPAT Transmissions Reaching a full kundalini awakening (most effective for that are shaktipat transmissions. Next is kriya supreme fire and advanced invocations) Heart chakra meditation: putting your attention on your heart chakra, maybe also repeating the name of an ascended master (like Jesus, Anandamayi Ma,...) and maybe letting this heart chakra shaktipat audio play too Invocations of Ascended Masters Bhakti Yoga Listening to energetically programmed audios like "Anahata" from the iawake website or "Vibration of Divine Love" from sapien medicine Listening to devotion music: To increase your baseline love and bliss, shaktipat transmissions are by far the most powerful imo. For some people it can take very long till these transmissions finally start working for real and their baseline bliss increases. Just expose yourself as much as possible to that shakti energy. Apart from joining live shaktipat transmissions (like from Gareth Duignam, Jan Esmann, Kai Shanti,..), I strongly recommend you let shaktipat audios play during as much of the day as possible as well as during sleep. Eventually it will start working. For that I recommend Gareth's transmissions like this: But you can listen to others too, like those from Kip Mazuy. - Happiness At post awakening you probably have some kind of detached attachment. Attachment because you still have the human state and very much care about things. But it's different from pre-awakening, because you have the awareness and maturity and detachment skills from the enlightened state. therefore it is detached attachment. You are attached to things, but if you fully integrate the enlightened state as well, then your happiness doesn't (fully) depend on your attachments being fulfilled. So you get both, the unconditional happiness from the enlightened state (being happy independ of your life situation) and at the same time the conditional happiness from the human state (having your desires fulfilled). - Combining Opposites The way I see it, there are 2 main principles or energies in existence: the masculine and feminine. This is how I conceptualize of masculine vs feminine (in the context of this post): active vs passive dominant vs submissive resisting vs accepting & allowing Projecting vs receiving power & force vs surrender attached vs detached in conflict vs in flow with "what is" external vs internal order vs chaos yang vs yin illusonary vs non-dual ego vs Infinity mind vs soul Generally when there is a duality of this vs that, then most people are either at the middle or at one extreme. This post awakening state is about combining these extremes. The masculine of the human state, and the feminine of the enlightened state. Having 2 extremes at the same time usually results in conflict, but here we try to have both extremes in harmony. I used to be a hard-core seeker and wanted to go deeper and deeper into the enlightened state, dissolve the human state and eventually do mahasamadhi. These are one of the reasons why I changed my attitude: God Realisation dissolved all my seeking energy The realisation that everything is equally real and true. The enlightened state is not more real than the human state. The enlightened identity is true relative to the enlightened state of consciousness. And the human identity is true relative to the human state. No state is inherently better. It all depends on your preferences. Whether you decide to keep biases or dissolve biases, both is a biased decision by the ego. You can't escape the paradox. The realisation that the human state is just as real as the enlightened state also means that life matters and things are important relative to the human state Contemplating the implications of Infinity, like Infinite hell realms. Which resulted in a strong rejection and aversion towards unbiased Infinity By being unbiased you accept and allow all of Infinity Suffering and evil are not love. Suffering is suffering, evil is evil and love is love. (Suffering and evil are love relative to the enlightened state but not relative to the human state). As a result the desire to reduce suffering for myself and others became strong again

Yep, but mine was different than most. Instead of getting complete detachment I got a sort of a limbo detachment. Like I was half way attached. I existed in this state for like 2 weeks. I felt like I was dragging around something dead. In that state it was constant bliss, sometimes it got too much and gave me a headache. It made sense to me now why Jesus and Moses both went into the wilderness for 40 days and 40 nights. If you weaken the body (Not telling you to do this lol don't want yall to harm yourselves) you truly discover that your natural state is peace, joy, and bliss. Our body and discriminatory human brain creates the suffering we have.

I made a post about different ways to increase spiritual bliss: The void dimension is kind of always involved to some extend. These are the ways how the void dimension increases bliss. By: increasing shakti awakening kundalini making transmissions and invocations more powerful making it easier to surrender and accept unconditionally making the enlightened state more profound I think the void dimension really is the component of enlightenment that causes the most practical benefits.

Spiritual Bliss I think spiritual bliss has these 3 main causes: 1. Shakti Bliss Shakti energy in your body causes bliss. It also makes your body sensations feel more and more like bliss. Ways to increase your baseline shakti: - (1) by having a high baseline void dimension In my experience, the higher my void dimension, the higher the shakti bliss. How to increase your baseline void dimension: Link - (2) by having an awakened kundalini How to awaken your kundalini: Shaktipat transmissions high void dimension advanced invocations, psychedelics, shamanic breathing, whole body orgasms, kriya supreme fire and least effective; kundalini yoga, kriya yoga, meditation - (3) by receiving Shaktipat transmissions in person intensives online live transmissions recorded video or audio transmissions during meditation and during as much of your daily activities (including sleep) as possible Jan Esmann and Gareth have the strongest shaktipat in my opinion. - (4) by doing Invocations of Ascended Masters The higher the shakti of an ascended master the better. The higher your energetic sensitivity, the stronger Invocations and transmissions become. How to: Link Keep in mind that shakti energy is different from just prana or chi, or the energy of most transmissions and invocations. Prana or chi is not blissful. In case your prana or chi ever turns blissful (for example through kriya yoga) then that's because of shakti, probably due to activating the kundalini. At least that's my current understanding. 2. Acceptance The higher your unconditional acceptance, the higher your spiritual bliss. I talked about that in the previous post. How to increase your acceptance skill: willingness to accept what you don't like ego surrender presence, mindfulness and self-awareness void dimension (a high void dimension makes surrender and acceptance a lot easier. Acceptance is actually a natural effect of a high void dimension) 3. Enlightenment Being conscious of non-dual nature increases bliss. The more profound your enlightened state, the higher the bliss. The level of profoundness depends on: illumination dimension void dimension magnitude dimension which facets of awakening you're conscious of surrender and deconstruction of the ego mind. - Summary So these are the main causes for spiritual bliss: shakti (energetic state) acceptance (mind state) enlightenment (consciousness state) - Other causes for spiritual bliss sense of purpose open heart chakra healed traumas being present ...

If someone takes heroin and tries to resist the bliss, he still feels bliss. If someone gets tortured brutally and tries to accept it he still suffers. Suffering and bliss are not merely a result of the mind. Both the mental and the environmental state are factors. If the environmental factor is too strong, you have no chance overcoming it with your mind. I disagree. The reason most people who seem to have everything aren't happy is because they DON'T have everything. They have a lot, but still are far from a perfect heavenly life. So of course they suffer. They could probably still list a 100 things every day that could be better, if they micro-analyse their day. Outside happiness doesn't replace inside happiness. Likewise, inside happiness doesn't replace outside happiness. Just take both. I wouldn't distinguish between true vs not true happiness. Instead between higher conscious and higher quality vs lower conscious and lower quality happiness. And that is relative. There could be aliens who are wired differently, and for them internal spiritual happiness and nondual states of consciousness are objectively low quality and bad. And video gaming gives them high quality, permanent, soul fulfilling happiness.

Recently my baseline awareness has been increasing. The more and more I pay attention the more I see the same traits I possess in someone else. Its funny because as a result I experience what it is like for others to deal with my ego, because their ego is doing the same thing. It is hilarious because sometimes those characteristics annoy me. Then I realize in that moment, so this is how I am making people feel. I apologize, I apologize for not working better to connect. I have now realized that in my desire to teach I relinquish the true desire of all communication which is the desire to connect. Its crazy I thought I transcended this but I have allowed myself to backslide into arguments. Instead of focusing on the differences that others speak I should focus on where our similarities lie. When I watch the logical types on this forum try to hammer in on their perspectives and stroke their metaphorical mental phalice I laugh because I spent majority of my life doing that. But now I truly see debate for what it is, a waste of time. I actually already know how to overcome debate as well, but I allow my old habits to take control. Well no more!! I will make a conscious effort to focus on what connects, than what separates. I truly know what the phrase follow your bliss means now. Follow what keeps you connected. We all know bliss, and peace does that, but also following the similarities you see in others that also reside within. Stop seeing someone as separate, as long as you are doing that you are stuck in ego. The illusion of separation? That is the biggest trap of all.

That is an imperfect version of heaven. In a real heaven you don't suffer regardless of how messed up ur mind is when you get there. Some possibilities how that might be possible: The heaven might instantly magically purify your mind such that it creates no suffering the inherent nature of human psycholgy as well as laws of logic could be bent such that even a messed up mind creates no suffering but only bliss. Internal change is not required if the external change is strong enough.

Acceptance vs Rejection Enlightened consciousness accepts everything unconditionally. The ego resists and rejects what it considers "not good". The more resistance you have to anything (like pain) the more you suffer. The more you accept unconditionally the greater your wellbeing on an internal spiritual level. And the greater your rejection of "not good", the greater your wellbeing on a wordly environmental level. Because rejecting what is considered "not good" makes you trying to environmentally maximize what is considered "good" and minimize what is considered "not good" (like pain). People pre-awakening tend to only pursue environmental wellbeing. People at awakening tend to prioritize spiritual wellbeing to greater and greater extends. If you are spiritually advanced you can exclusively focus on spiritual wellbeing and that can be enough to experience constant bliss. But: this is not holistic and ignores humanness this is ironically still dependent on environmental circumstances. Someone living an average life can have high wellbeing exclusively from focusing on spiritual wellbeing. But if environmental circumstances change enough (like getting kidnapped and tortured) then there is always a range of pain that exceeds your spiritual acceptance skill and thus unavoidably leads to suffering. In such a situation environmental bias and changes are necessary. Someone who is truly selfless and unconditional wouldn't resist being kidnapped in the first place. So the solution to holistic wellbeing is to include both spiritual and environmental wellbeing, without trying to bypass one. For environmental wellbeing it is necessary to have biases. The stronger your biases and notions of "good" vs "bad", the better, imo. The notion of "good" vs "bad" is deeply ingrained in humans and ensures the best chances for environmental wellbeing. If you dissolve that bias through a-human states of consciousness, you will probably pay for that sooner or later. And yet, it is necessary to include ruthless acceptance in order to maximize overall wellbeing (at least in this local reality). Because the more resistance you have to anything (like pain) the more you suffer. To decrease suffering on a spiritual level, acceptance is required. Even better than acceptance is to love it. And even more effective is if you love it so mindlessly that you want even more of the pain. The further you get away from resistance, and the closer you get to these senseless levels of love, the greater your spiritual wellbeing. And that actually works. If I experience pain, and adopt that attitude of trying to love the pain and even getting into the mindset of wanting more of it (even if that mindest is faked) then that reduces suffering, sometimes to the point where it makes no difference for me whether there is pain or not (if the pain is low enough). But this of course only works for pain up to a certain level. If the pain exceeds the acceptance skill threshold then suffering occurs. I suppose most people would probably prefer a fair balance between spiritual and environmental wellbeing. But I personally am more biased towards the ego, the environmental component. I love goodness and I hate suffering. And I want to hate suffering. Evil and suffering is unjustifiable and doesn't deserve love. It should be absolutely eradicated from existence for ever. (good and bad/evil are relative so how would it be possible (just in theory) to eradicate the bad/evil absolutely? Simply by creating for each being what it considers good relative to itself. This is goodness and love. Allowing suffering to exist is evilness.) So I do balance the spiritual and environmental wellbeing, but I pursue the spiritual component of wellbeing (unconditional acceptance) not genuinely but out of necessity because that's the only way to maximize overall wellbeing in this local reality that we're currently in. I fake loving suffering because I hate suffering, because I love goodness. Goodness is perhaps my highest value. Loving the "bad" is a calculated survival strategy for coping with the unjustifiable abusiveness of this local reality.

What is the force that cannot be defeated, represented by Kali's unstoppable destruction on the battlefield? This thing all things devours; Birds, beasts, trees, flowers; Gnaws iron, bites steel; Grinds hard stones to meal; Slays king, ruins town, And beats high mountain down The answer is time, or perhaps we might call it the inevitability of death that comes along with the existence of time. Kali is invincible and ruthless in slaughter. The oldest written records of Kali, or goddesses who became synonymous with Kali support this tantric interpretation of Kali dancing upon Shiva. The Rig Veda, which was set down somewhere between 1500 to 1200 BCE from older oral traditions contains a hymn called the Rathri Suktim, which is sung to Rathri, goddess of night, who was understood as synonymous with Kali. This hymn is also sung to Kali. The Rathri Skuktim speaks of a sage Kushika, who perceived the enveloping force of darkness while meditating and thus invoked the name of Rathri which means night as an all-powerful goddess, Rathri Devi, this holy darkness was called upon to free mortals from their fears and their bonds to the earth and like Kali was seen as possessing the all devouring power of time. Worshippers of Rathri sought to manifest this devouring power to overcome fear and any obstacle that they may face. Conceptually, Rathri is very similar to Kali, and other Vedic writings attest to this as well. The Atharva Veda which was likely the last part of the Vedas to be composed, somewhere between 1200 BCE and 1000 BCE, directly associates Rathri with several goddesses, including Durga. Then we have the Mahabharata which was written between 400 BCE and 300 CE, and this text combines the names of Kali and Rathri into Kalatratri and she's very reminiscent of what we saw from Kali in the Devi Mahatmaya. She shows on the battlefield to battle various asuras and villains, her tongue lolls out thirsty for blood and most importantly, she specifically is associated with blackness and the eternal void, like Kali. The Rig Veda also mentions the goddess Nirrti, who is the personification of death, decay and destruction, and who may be either a predecessor to Kali or perhaps just a very similar deity expressing its similar concepts. There is a continuity of thought about void goddesses that we can trace from the very earliest written records of Indian literature, right up to the present. Is it dark already? How light is a light? Do you laugh while screaming "Is it cold outside?" All of this destruction is also linked to cycles of creation and rebirth. And the idea of her driving cosmic time in intended to be paralleled to the cycles of personal growth, which are supposed to come from the studying of the Vedic scriptures. Most religions and spiritual practices are about self-improvement to some extent, and this is true of Hinduism, and Tantric traditions in particular are focused on using meditation to achieve spiritual liberation. The constant battled between the devas and the asuras are therefore generally understood to represent the good and evil instincts within mankind. Any esoteric interpretation of Hindu folklore or scripture presumes this; thus, we can begin to see Kali's relentless slaughter of asuras as representation of what we must do to free our higher selves, our good instincts from encumbrance. We must ruthlessly seek to slaughter any signs of evil or deception inside of us. This is a metaphor to describe the practice of any kind of quest to obtain spiritual enlightenment or righteousness. It's the process of rooting out ignorance, selfishness, illusion and delusion and anything else that causes us not to live up to our values, to fall short of our own moral compass and to fail to reach our own potential, thus Kali represents not only the progress of physical time, but the progress of self-improvement, the opposite of personal stasis, which is a kind of spiritual death or slumber. This statis and complacency is what we must go to war against, says Kali, through her bloody trappings she is telling us that attainment of spiritual freedom comes only through the elimination of attachment, and the destruction of false consciousness. That's what the severed head represents, false consciousness. The sword represents the knowledge that destroys illusion. This iconography portrays the process of self-improvement as active, bold, tumultuous, painful, a striking contrast to the stillness of Shiva's meditation. In the end, these two ideas are designed to work in tandem, the quiet reflection of meditation should lead to insight, and insight to action and through this process we are transformed. The metaphysical interpretation of Kali dancing upon Shiva, the emergence of reality from the cosmic stillness parallels the metaphysical interpretation of transformative action emerging from the stillness of meditation. There are two other folkloric interpretations on Kali's dance on Shiva, and although they are somewhat different from the Tantric interpretation, they still work with the same idea of self-improvement, or mastery of self. In both of these interpretations, Kali is understood as the destructive aspect of Shiva, when Shiva is portrayed as calm or peacefully reclining beneath Kali's furious dance, he's showing us mastery of his anger, or darker thoughts. He's aware of these darker impulses but remains in control or unperturbed. If we see Shiva depicted as being dead or in pain beneath Kali's feet, that's seen as an expression of Shiva losing control with his dark side, or id, taking power. So, although different, we still deal with the same concepts. Kali and Shiva are basically always working together to describe and depict the war that is the path to spiritual mastery. The iconography isn't all blood and battle, though, Kali also expresses the love of a mother with the hand signs or mudras that she's frequently making with her right hands. In her Dakshina Kali forms specifically, the mudras are abhaya - fearlessness, and varada - blessing, this work says a promise of spiritual freedom and salvation to those who have the courage to seek ultimate truth. There is no real comfort in delusion, so the message here is along the lines of, "only the truth will set you free." One thing I know for certain Oh, I'm pretty sure It ain't over I'm not done Another important avenue for spiritual growth and perfection in Hinduism is reincarnation, with the idea being that the eternal soul is improved upon gradually through multiple lifecycles, and that those cycles of death and rebirth are of course powered by Kali. The garland of severed hands that she wears is specifically tied to the concept of karma and reincarnation, hands are what you do work with, and this collection of hands represents the work of karma, the many lifetimes of work that it takes to achieve nirvana. The severing of those hands, accordingly, represents Kali's ability to bestow ultimate freedom from the binding of karma. By these means, Kali is seen as helping us to achieve enlightenment, not only by being ruthless in the quest to root out evil and delusion, but also by causing our souls to be reborn from the dissolution of death. Kali's eternal existence outside of time, outside of the veil of maya, or illusion, which is the physical world, is what enables her to perform this function. This is the reason for Kali's nudity, she is uncovered by any sort of cloak of illusion, the ultimate personification of indestructible, eternal truth. Thus, Kali is perceived as beckoning us on our journey to find truth from a place which is actually the source of ultimate reality. For similar reasons, Kali is always described as black or dark blue, and again, Kali means the black one, and of course, the link between the great goddesses and the primordial darkness goes back to Rathri Devi in the Rig Veda. These symbolic implications of Kali's blackness thus are of a prime importance, primordial importance, and are spoken of often. The Maha Nirvana Tantra, written in 18th century explains that just as all colours disappear in black, so all names and forms disappear in her. Sri Ramakrishna, an 18th century Bengali yogi and saint, similarly explains that "My mother is the principle of consciousness, she is Acanda Sachidananda, indivisible reality, awareness and bliss. The night's sky between the stars is perfectly black, the waters of the ocean depths are the same. The infinite is always mysteriously dark, this inebriating darkness is my beloved Kali." You can clearly recognize the language of creative chaos here, Kali's darkness represents things from which creation can emerge, like the ocean or space. Kali therefore represents the principle of consciousness that emerges from that darkness, an invisible yet all pervasive and life-giving force. Sri Ramakrishna also describes Kali as the force behind the sun, which is kind of Egyptian concept. The thing is to tap into that force we must first submit to the destruction of ego. This is the dissolution of Kali into which all names, and forms disappear, and then in terms of reincarnation, we can imagine our soul sort of dissolving back into that dark ocean of Kali, upon death, only to reemerge reborn from that ocean when we're reincarnated, just as the consciousness of the universe first emerged from that same void. The kindling of consciousness from the void and the spark of awareness itself is often liken to a fire, or to a light that blooms in the darkness and Kali is associated with exactly this sort of fire of awareness. The uncompromising truth which Kali offers is often likened to the fire of the sun, which burns away illusion like morning fog, along the same lines, the very first written record of Kali by name associates her with the purifying fire, specifically the fire of ritual sacrifice. We have this idea of purification through destruction and disillusion. This text is the Mundaka Upanishad, dating approximately to the 5th or 6th century BCE and it names Kali as one of the seven quivering tongues of the fire god, Angi, who's flames devoured the sacrifices intended for the gods, thereby transmitting them up to heaven via the rising smoke. Obviously you'll notice the connection between the lolling tongue of pretty much all Kali depictions and the idea of her as a tongue of the consuming fire god. There is also a deity mentioned in a slightly older Jaiminiya Brahmana dated to the 8th century BCE, called Dirgha-jihvi and this means the long tongued one, and this is thought to be an early form of Kali, or perhaps an older goddess whose mythology became combined with Kali over time. Dirgha-jihvi is an ogress who drinks up all the soma produced by the holy yagna ritual of the devas, which causes the devas to become weak. Who is the Alpha? How do you say I'm sorry And there's nothing to be afraid of? Oh, I'm pretty sure It ain't over I'm not done So, you can see the similarities to the slightly later concept of Kali as a tongue of holy fire, which devours the sacrifices intended for the gods. Instead of the soma stealing instrument of chaos from this earlier tale, Kali is now simply consuming, metabolizing and then transmitting the essence of the sacrifice up to the heavens. This concept of holy consuming fire leads us back to the concept of dissolution, which means it's time to talk a little more about Nirti, the goddess of death, decay and destruction, that appears in the Rig Veda, the Sanskrit ford Nirti is translated as decay, and it's derived from Nir which means to separate, think dissolution, and Nirti can also be translated as a lack of order, or a state of disorder. Think of the whirling pool of primordial chaos, from which creation emerges. Nirti seems to specifically embody the dissolution end of this process. The Vedas also used the word Nirti in lowercase form to indicate a realm of nonexistence and absolute darkness. The void, essentially. Like her sister void goddess, Kali, Nirti is described as having dark skin and additionally dressing in dark clothes. There is a Hindu shakta poet from the 18th century named Ramprasad Sen - shakta - he fallows shaktism or the worship of shakti the divine goddess - he is also from Bengal, like Sri Ramakrishna and he associates Kali with the cremation ground, which builds on the concepts of fire and dissolution. Prashad means a ritual sacrifice, usually in the form of a food. "O Kali, thou art fond of cremation grounds; So I have turned my heart into one That thou, a resident of cremation grounds, May dance there unceasingly. O Mother! I have no other fond desire in my heart; fire of a funeral pyre is burning there; O Mother! I have preserved the ashes of the dead bodies all around that Thou may come. Oh Mother! Keeping Shiva, conqueror of Death, under Thy feet, Come, dancing to the tune of music; Prasad waits with his eyes closed." The metaphor of the heart as cremation ground, is a reference to the holy fire of Kali, which burns away all the bad things, false consciousness, illusion, base desires, selfishness and so on. This inner fire that Kali bestows to her devotees has a specific name which is gyanagni, which means fire of knowledge. This is the sun-like aspect of Kali's truth, which burns away all illusion. You can see how all of the concepts behind Kali's symbols complement one another and now you can make sense of all the death and gore that pervades her imagery and her stories. Now you know there's nothing to fear, nothing but the truth, that is. The truth is like a sword, sharp, cutting, inflexible, but which also promises a kind of spiritual freedom. The ultimate spiritual freedom, which can only be won through courage. Kali offers us blessing and courage with her right hands, and offers us the sharp tools of freedom with her left, dancing Kali pedaling her cosmic bicycle, powering the cycles of time, existence and reincarnation, of which our world is made. Kali, the divine mother, who gave birth to all and who waits at the end to welcome us back home, back to the primordial sea from which our consciousness first arose.

Meditation notes: - mindfulness of head and spine is enough although intense concentration results in intense bliss. Don't chase bliss. - Integration of major dualities like Self and Other. It's funny but I tend to only be mindful or non judgemental toward other, not myself. It might be just unique to me and my journey. Integrating myself results in leaning back, self love, masculine energy. It's a major duality integration for me. - I'm very conscious of the whole and it's wellbeing. But less so of my own cell. It's my own path. - replace concentration ability with simple mindfulness/ non judgement practice, polarization, spine and head work - polarization: calm, sweet, cheerful, high big 5, non judgemental, mindful, acceptance of otherness

AHAAHAHAHAHAH, this keeps getting better and better, i love this stuff so much. today I finished my contemplation tools (i have these small yellow papers, that are put in like a stack notebook you can pull from) so I got the bigger version after coming back from the gym. hmmm, what else, oh yeah. I realized I am starting to turn these spiritual stuff into dogma and ideology, and I don't know how to not do that, I will add that to my contemplation list. Life Purpose well I tried making a vision board, i was trying to download abode photoshop cracked but internet sucks so it starts downloading then stops midway, even when I use IDM. Diet clean. Reading did not read a lot, only introduction of big leap. Meditation my technique worked! I sat the whole time, i thought: its probably 25 minutes in now, then i heard the goddamn bell, its been 35 minutes! but my focus was weird, it would get so deep for like 30 seconds, like sooo deep, like everything other than the breath disappears from existence, then after 30 seconds or so i get sucked back in to distraction for like 2 minutes or even more. i also spent the whole day in spiritual bliss, and yeah I'm trying not to get attached to it. Physics watched meditation videos instead, F, BUT I WONT GIVE UP, I WILL DEVELOP GODLY WORK ETHIC. Gym yo, so currently I go each other day, i decided to make more structure into my routine, i would go the first day on Sunday, second day on Tuesday and third on Thursday. and in between them I will go do HIIT on the treadmill (Monday and Wednesday)

Super fun read which I found on the Solipsism reddit: "It’s a lot of information to swallow, it’s one thing to hear about it or get told about it, and then form an opinion and belief about it. But to experience it, to know it, and then have to actually let it sink in, and realize it as truth, accept it as truth, thats the hardest pill to swallow, it will change your life forever. Here’s a list of Pros and cons I made based of of this theory of oneness. Since this is like the theory of everything and so broad I can’t possibly fill all deatils but will do a brief summary of it. I’ve got mixed feelings about it, a part of me feels like a happy kid on xmas who just received a blessing from above, and another part of me can’t help but feel slightly scared and sad at the same time realizing the implications of this theory. Anyways So if this theory is true, which it seems like, based on what we can conceive of right now, the pros and cons of being everything and nothing at the same time would be the following: PROS: Infinite positive attributes From the limited, constrained, vulnerable little competing ego animal we are, constantly fighting for our survival in this reality, from the egos perspective to become god would be The ultimate goal to gain the massivest ego boost you can get, becuase if you are god which is everything, that means that you are all the infinitely positive attributes you can imagine. Like if you LITERALLY are GOD. That means you are infinitely awesome/perfect/proudest/handsome/sexy/cool/powerful/strong/perfect/beautiful/winning/lucky/rich/cute/fast/charming/funny/genius etc. You the trues OG GOAT LEGEND EVER. You have and will experience every single ”most positively pleasureable and awesomest” experiences possible, things that are so good that you would NEVER want to die, for something that feels so good, you WOULD want to live FOREVER, in PARADISE??❤️ no matter how negative or meaningless or lonely or confusing or whatever this mystery of a reality is, as longs as u feel good, and enjoy the masterpieces who gives a fuck about the negative shit amirite? #bliss you simply are the best of the best king??⛩??? Being something. You’d rather be something forever rather than nothing forever right? Imagine infinite nothingness compared to this infinite somethingness. What if existance never came to be and we never were born? Wouldn’t that suck ass? Well guess what, existance either always was somehow. Or it spawned from nothingness, in a miraculous event, like a blessing, like magic, just like that. From nothing to everything, that’s the miracle. HOKUS POKUS BOOM now we’re here, lets take a moment to appreciate and be grateful for this gift of existance , and for reality being. Infinite control and power You have infinite power and freedom to manipulate reality and live your dream and do whatever you want whenever you want. Imagination is the limit. You get to enjoy infinite positive things such as Superpowers, magic, cashflow, fame, infinite love, drugs and sex, pleasure, entertainment of all categories, euphoria and laughter, all magical worlds you can imagine. To enjoy the best feelings ever and from the bad ones you learnt to appreciate the greatness in a new dualistic perspective, to grow stronger and evolve from. The comedy of it all The cosmic giggle, you the best comedian ever, who wrote the funniest joke in existance, the joke is so good, it never gets old, and it’ll have you rolling laughing til you pass out or think about something else ? The so reassuring realness You are real! Well.. Atleast you feel real and this REALity feels real, thats all that matters..right?! And all the people around you feel real, your body feels real, all your senses feel very real, your emotions and thoughts feel real, and if you enter DMT world it even feels ”realer than real”, so I mean can it even get any realer than that? What even is real? Did we make that term up, does it exist independently from us? Or are we it? Atleast we seem to exist, so that must mean we are real to some degree! If you can’t tell the difference between illusion and ”reality”, then does it even matter if its fake or not? What if fake reality is as real as it gets, then couldn’t you label that as real? It would still feel the same? What if there is no such thing as ”reality”, and the closest thing we can come to ”reality” based from the fundamental laws of existance is a ”the most ideal ultra perfect simulation/hallucination/dream”. If real doesn’t exist, than a high quality simulations is as real as it gets! -You’re immortal bro!! So guess what, no more fear of death! You get to feel fearfree limitless euphoria and pleasure! the reassuring feeling that whatever happends, everything will be okay. so fear not, worry not, becuase you’ll survive and go back to source, and get to enjoy gods most powerful feelings of bliss and unconditional love that is the highest most positive thing that exists and ever will be, its what makes living worth living. -get to be fully present and enjoy the moment to the fullest cuz why not its all we got so make the best of it! Infininite experience and wisdom, and infinite non-loneliness. through lessons and experiences and playing and meeting avatars, you would experience all relationships between avatars and the emotions that come with, aswell as all experiences and the knowledge that comes with, what an adventure! Best way to learn is to experience it directly! If you’re alone that means there are no enemies outside of you! The only enemy is you, so know you have a reason to be empathic to other people and have peace ok earth, now it suddenly makes sense and even is selfish to help other people other than you becuase they literally also are you! Treat others as you would of wanted to be treated. Please yourself and make yourself feel loved! Be an angel to yourself! CONS(warning may trigger people): Being nothing. While being everything can be awesome, you are also somehow nothing at the same time. Pure void being awareness, eternally was and eternally will be. But wait, so is the somethingness an illusion? Or is the nothingness an illusion? What even is nothing? Are we more something than nothing, or more nothing than something? Or same of both?Hard to get your head around.. Non-linear insanity. when you live in a linear reality timeline, in a confined space with rules, things make sense and things feel logical and full of purpose. But when you are everywhere and nowhere at the same time, there is no destination anymore, it’s like game over, no goal to orient yourself towards, nothing to fulfill becuase you already are fulfilled, being infinite, can you truly be that in one instant, or is it a constant state of novelty experience never ending, or are you all that is encompassed into one thing? Either way you feel ironically calustrophobic knowing that even if you are infinite, there is nothing outside of you which makes you feel trapped inside yourself, in a place with no time, space, rule, meaning or instruction until you create it. You are alone. This hits me the hardest, this makes me emotional tbh. You realize the fact that you are alone in existance. It’s a cold fact to accept as truth, that it’s only you, all about you, all this time, there was no one else but you. It’s beautiful but sad at the same time. That intense feeling of loneliness, and that feeling of never ever being able to escape that loneliness once you’re god again. Remembering why you made yourself forget, realizing why some people chose to stay asleep and didn’t want to be awakened or simply won’t and can’t accept the truth and therefore stay sleep to stay sane and stay in the dream of a reality were you are not alone and feel love from other than yourself. Does god have limited power? they say god is almighty, can do everything, but the thing with god is that god is. And can god stop being? Can god create himself and destroy himself? Can god make it so he is not alone in existance? Or is it/he simply bound by some kind of existial fundamental law that is beyond him/over him that says: he is and always will be, and he is alone. But besides that he can create illusion hallucinations of space and time to stay sane and distracted from boredom of being? Becuase he can’t escape himself (being) so he makes himself forget he is god and goes about dreaming time and space into existance to give a sense of meaning to the meaningless existance he is forced to endure and can’t ever escape from? He invents, defines and creates meaningful MASTERPIECES. Like painting on an empty canvas. He creates reasons to wanting to exist, becuase if there is something that forces him to exist, and he has no power over that, then he must simply accept it as truth and simply make the best of it becuase there is nothing he can do about it. So after endlessly dreading about it and being bored and miserable god thought hey why not try to enjoy this instead, and created a reason to wanting to exist for example #lifehack So god wiped his own memory and started a new birth and death life dream. When we are limited egos, we long for god, for the answers to all the mysteries, and want to experience and come closer to god. But when we are god and know everything, we want to forget, and become a limited human, and I see why, but in some lives we want to remember though to have that upperhand in the game, and to remember if you lived this life before. Everything is fake Your ego is fake(this hits hard), your friends and family is fake, your avatar is fake, this physical reality is fake, nothing but a simulated/dreamy illusion to distract you from your ever existing dread of loneliness beingness (real fundamental reality). Love and relationships. what hits me the hardest is the fact that when I see something or experience something, and want to write it down, or record it, maybe take a photo or record it on cam. To later show someone. That really I am just showing it to myself. So why am I even trying to capture it? Or the fact when I perform on stage, or in front of people, or whenever I am having a deep and meaningful conversation, or loving moment with someone, I am talking to myself, I am loving myself. Love is real but, I made it, I am it. It’s my dream? I’m the main character. Gods wish he never had was he wanted to have someone else to love, and have someone to receive love from. So he created this illusion to experience that dream. To create something that felt like ”other” or outside of himself. Tricking yourself into a dream. Suffering your own tricks, while at the same time laughing your ass of at yourself. There is no one else to blame or to be mad at or to debate with, or take responsibility for except yourself. Its all on u and only you, and you playin yourself. The worst part is when you realize that all this time you had been talking to people, building relationships, hurt people, all those memories, trying to convince them of things, or prove something to them, argued with them, and gotten into fights, not to mention falling in love with people.. but all that was really a trick on yourself, tada? tricking yourself that there were such a thing as ”other”. Who is all this for? Me, so enjoy the eternal moment! I mean what choice do you have? Mohahahahamanic laughter Can god choose to stop being? Maybe not? Can he not exist? Can he exist? Is anything real? Why and how is? That is the mystery that we may know, but chose to forget? Or will we ever know, does god even know? Is having all control in existance really that exciting when there is nothing that is not controlled by you? I mean besides the awesome aspects of it, the negatives is that if all is controlled by you, you are simply the puppeteer puppeting your life talking to yourself. No surprises, no adventures, just controlled creations.. dull, predictable, overpowered. Existance can seem nihilistic, meaningless and tragic. There is nothing new, becuase you are absolute infinity, you encompass everything in an instant, all goals are done, this means the second you begin existance you are also done with it. The bad thing with that is that life and goals then can seem meaningless since they have already been achieved and nothing new exists that you haven’t already done. But the good thing is that if this is true, it means that a gigaton of stress and pressure just got lifted of your shoulders. This means (thank god hallelujah bless the heavens feels good to be alive baby) that you don’t have to worry about the past and future and enjoy the present to the fullest!! Knowing that you already have done everything so be proud over yourself and start to chill and enjoy life, just be and enjoy being to the fullest, nothing is lost, all shall remain and be svaed for you to enjoy and look back upon, this masterpiece of a creation you made, enjoy! Game over = game on! The good thing with being everything is that it removes jealousy from the ego, it makes you proud seeing yourself being successfull in another lifetime outside of your ego and you get to feel happy for them instead of threatened to compete with them. Jealousy becomes a gift, a privilege from the perspective of god, becuase it is an emotion that can only be felt from ego. Ego feels real so lets enjoy the feeling of being ego for real. In the state of god consciousness you are everything, non-duality, and even if this may be true, this altered consciousness of being the ego is a gift for you to experience duality. The bad thing with being everyone is that everyone outside of your ego who is suffering right now in the world is also you, that’s a lot of suffering to go through.. now you really start caring if you can feel what they feel. Still the mystery is, how can god be? That is the question.. the mystery."

Bliss, Ecstacy, Butters.

This was the day in which I first felt a palpable sense akin to the 10th Ox herding picture’s imagery. Having reached cessation a number of times and being ridiculously higher in baseline consciousness, I was re-entering the public world while consumed by the Nibbanic bliss the Buddha spoke about, or at least the memory of the cessation “moment”. It is ultimately the most distinct memory of nothing anyone can never have. Taken to full introspection, the state or rather non-state of cessation can unravel experience into whole new directions I highly doubt any other path would produce out of common spiritual practices which are not entirely individual processes.

Just want to say to everyone thank you sooo much ?❤️❤️ Really helping. I’m still soaking it up! For a few days I went to just following my inspiration first thing when I woke up and went out and bought a redbull which I usually don’t drink! While those few days following my inspiration were great in a sense, felt more inspirations starting to come up and more excitement, I have to admit without a meditation practice a lot of monkey mind came up, more worrying and incessant non stop chatter. Silence really does bring us bliss. Been debating both ends, silence and doing with joy! Oh what a journey.

You can have a gf and friends, just don't cling to them too much. You can see in the documentary how deeply attached Teal is to her inner circle. And that's a huge problem. You cannot build the foundation of your life on any other human. If you do, you're in for a world of hurt and drama. Because eventually you will lose that human. And even before you lose them, those humans will be selfish and will not give you the infinite love you crave. So they will always disappoint you. The only thing that won't disappoint you is God/Yourself. Well, she's wrong about that, as evidenced by how much suffering her human attachments are creating for her. But of course you don't want to take detachment to an extreme where you cannot have healthy human relationships. Just don't build your life on top of other humans. Keep your human relationships somewhat loose. Be fully happy without needing anyone, yet still be social. That's what awakening is for. The more you awaken the more happy you will be on your own. At high spiritual levels you can be in bliss all on your own. You should not need an inner circle of pawns to be happy or to support you emotionally. Fundamentally what Teal seems to be missing is that she's dreaming up all others. She's lost in that dream, endlessly chasing other, endlessly dissatisfied. No other can ever satisfy you because all other is imaginary.

For example i know about haidakhan babaji and did research about him for 5-6 months. There is just too much evidence that either he was an avatar or he was enlightened high consciousness master. Too many highly spiritual groups from all over the world gathered and described his miracles/aura things he did, for example one guy said he wasnt spiritual or anything but the moment he came near him he felt like he was standing near god. Which is according to david Hawkins people that are consciousness 600+ and especially enlightened people have this of aura. And i have felt this aura 1x and also projected it 1x to somebody else when i was in a very highly conscious state that i was seeing everything in fulll hd/golden/lighter/alive colors. The moment i felt this aura i got into bliss and was overwhelmed. So do you guys know any other people that are like haidakha babaji from 20-21 century? According to David Hawkins people with stable 600-700+ consciousness are extremely rare. Let alone 700+ enlightened masters.

good stuff ... to shut the mind 99% when out walking, count steps one til ten then repeat your mind is given a repetitive task which takes 1% cpu and you are free now to go bliss mode also look up now down, skwwards is where the god stuff is, the unawakened are glum ever looking down can do this in the home too, count breaths, same technique in one out two in three etc.

I go completely by the feeling, because truth and bliss are actually the same thing, if the truth makes you unhappy it likely is not the truth. Nonduality is extremely beautiful True solipsism is also the least lonely perspective that there is with infinite creative and playful potential

love is, to set them free if they come back, it was meant to be what you have to realize is that even if spouses stay faithful they still have lustful feelings or unstoppable crushes or heavy infatualtions should they keep quiet about them and thereby not be authentic in order to keep each of you in your ignorance is bliss mutual captivity if they keep quiet it surely amounts to emotional cheating monogamy is possible but it takes a lot of work and it entails deep sacrifices on both sides which may be good for the sake of raising a family maybe it is better for one to renew one's relationship vows every decade or so and if either wants out then bid them well as we well know nothing is forever and people can change unrecognisably even in a short time raising children is basically a 20 year program