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@EntheogenTruthSeeker yes. it is. but the direction of your experience only starts heading towards that... starts transforming towards that place when you make the u-turn and start driving it that way. the place you ask about is like a reflection in the mirror. yes, the mirror's reflection is very real. but it's secondary. the primary is the one before the mirror. so your question is really like this: is Smile a reflection that is possible in the mirror? answer: yes! yes it is. but to make that happen, the one standing before it must smile first now the real life reflection of the mirror to your heart/smile is not instantaneous like a mirror... (it builds up-to that point though!) but the change begins with you. start today and your life will begin to transform... to match your smile the mirror adjusts the reflection in it accordingly... and the bigger and deeper your smile, the faster this happens... keep smiling no matter what happens on the outside, knowing deep within that the transformation is underway... you will feel it in your heart and soul and before you know it, the place which is Heaven will have arrived for the one fit to live in it

Has anyone read any of Ken Wilbers books? I’m pondering which one to start with. I was considering Integral Transformation but I also heard he has over 200 written books ? Suggestions?

I don't see them as having any conflict. You are not the story, but the story has to have drama (perceived negativity) to be a story in the first place. No one complains that J.K Rowling is a horrible person because she kills Harry's parents and creates Voldemort as the basis of the Harry Potter story, the the character of Harry himself. We don't point out these things because we know it's a story. She wrote it out of creative love, to inspire, entertain and make people feel. That's what most people glean from the stories, because that was the author's intention for the books. You are Harry Potter. You can bitch and moan at the world and "God" (JK Rowling) for killing your parents and stay stuck living at the Dursley's or you can go live your adventure and transformation. You came to live the adventure, that's alignment with love. Why is JK Rowling not evil for dreaming up Voldemort? Because Harry Potter doesn't exist. Likewise you do not exist outside this story.

Maharaj: I wonder whether I am the right man to answer your questions. I know little about things and people. I know only that I am, and that much you also know. We are equals. Q: Of course I know that I am. But I do not know what it means. M: What you take to be the ‘I’ in the ‘I am’ is not you.To know that you are is natural, to know what you are is the result of much investigation. You will have to explore the entire field of consciousness and go beyond it. For this you must find the right teacher and create the conditions needed for discovery. Generally speaking, there are two ways: external and internal. Either you live with somebody who knows the Truth and submit yourself entirely to his guiding and moulding influence, or you seek the inner guide and follow the inner light wherever it takes you. In both cases your personal desires and fears must be disregarded. You learn either by proximity or by investigation, the passive or the active way. You either let yourself be carried by the river of life and love represented by your Guru, or you make your own efforts, guided by your inner star. In both cases you must move on, you must be earnest. Rare are the people who are lucky to find somebody worthy of trust and love. Most of them must take the hard way, the way of intelligence and understanding, of discrimination and detachment (viveka-vairagya). This is the way open to all. Q: I am lucky to have come here: though I am leaving tomorrow, one talk with you may affect my entire life. M: Yes, once you say ‘I want to find Truth’, all your life will be deeply affected by it. All your mental and physical habits, feelings and emotions, desires and fears, plans and decisions will undergo a most radical transformation. Q: Once I have made up my mind to find The Reality, what do I do next? M: It depends on your temperament. If you are earnest, whatever way you choose will take you to your goal. It is the earnestness that is the decisive factor. Q: What is the source of earnestness? M: It is the homing instinct, which makes the bird return to its nest and the fish to the mountain stream where it was born. The seed returns to the earth, when the fruit is ripe. Ripeness is all. Q: And what will ripen me? Do I need experience? M: You already have all the experience you need, otherwise you would not have come here. You need not gather any more, rather you must go beyond experience. Whatever effort you make, whatever method (sadhana) you follow, will merely generate more experience, but will not take you beyond. Nor will reading books help you. They will enrich your mind, but the per- son you are will remain intact. If you expect any benefits from your search, material, mental or spiritual, you have missed the point. Truth gives no advantage. It gives you no higher status, no power over others; all you get is truth and the freedom from the false. Q: Surely truth gives you the power to help others. M: This is mere imagination, however noble! In truth you do not help others, because there are no others. You divide people into noble and ignoble and you ask the noble to help the ignoble. You separate, you evaluate, you judge and condemn — in the name of truth you destroy it. Your very desire to formulate truth denies it, because it cannot be contained in words. Truth can be expressed only by the denial of the false — in action. For this you must see the false as false (viveka) and reject it (vairagya). Renunciation of the false is liberating and energizing. It lays open the road to perfection. Person Middle English: from Old French persone, from Latin persona ‘actor's mask, character in a play’, later ‘human being’.

@Free Mind You're forgetting the opportunity here. Our thoughts about other people color our interactions and veil our feelings of love and oneness of them. In thought there are other people. I'm me and you're you, duh. Outside of thought, we are one. Most people just haven't thought to consider this, but again, our oneness is also a "duh!" moment. In your mind, you believe this realization will take away your love of others and your family members, but it's quite the opposite, it will only cause it to grow, or rather you to become aware of how beyond logic your connection and your Love really is. When we observe our thoughts, and stop believing our thoughts, the separation between us and other, dissolves and love and bliss shines through. It's a process and sometimes we get caught up and forget the entire point, LOVE, duh! But without challenge would any transformation be worth so much talk? No. Is Love what you think it is? NO!!! It's much, much bigger than that. Bigger than that. Bigger than THAT. Just stop comparing. It's bigger than that.

@Elton yes sir multiple times in my childhood probably 5 to 7 times the scycle return and i vectimized my sister and my little brother once i have to mention here that i'm above 20 and did the victimization thing when i was 12 due to lack of awareness >>we had too much conflict in the house [physical abuse emotional abuse and dysfunctional relationships...parent at each other throats] -i struggle these days with the stigma and money problems i also have little inner comflict -i have feelings of powerlessness -stigmatization [doubts if i'm gay or i turned to gay due to the abuse btw my friend he was like my brother we were 10 maybe or little he tricked me and we ... apparently he saw it somewhere we were 10 or less ] -difficulty to form friendships and bond with people [being liked...] -i had sex with girls and i didn't felt like it it was shallow [i wanna know if there's a way to correct this also ] -i'm currently doing transformation mastery by rsd julien [it helps] -i've been dealing with dpdr last 10 months i came out of it strong and yeah i'm trying to cure anything left of my past traumas and share awareness around the subject i have to say that i'm not here to cry or be upset about anything i've done this part i want support and solutions that will lead to results [be powerful again and understant the stigma of this gay shit and come out of this horrible dream that i suffered through for a good solid 20 years of my life shit 20 years down the toilet ] thank you sir

Hey Jude. I can see that your post comes from a genuine place, so I thought I should also give my reply. I am not Leo, although he thinks I am him. It seems that you have ample experience with many teachers. I like your approach. When going on the journey on the discovery of the Self, we must walk the paths of the many to arrive at our own path. If we walk in the shadow of one teacher, we inherit their mistakes. When we walk in the shadows of many teachers, we can see some rays of light passing through which we didn't see with our previous teachers. Only when we uncover all shadows, we can become the Light. The integration of many perspectives is very important, and should not be overlooked. Leo's perspective is helpful to the seeker, but it should not be taken as the Truth. The only way to arrive at the gateless gate is to pass through all the gates that took us to the gateless one. But once we pass all gates, in the end, we must deny the existence of all gates. When Leo says that he has had awakenings unlike anyone spiritual master, explicitly he tells us the Truth he has experienced, but implicitly he is telling us to deny his Truth. There is no way to go where he has been if we don't go there for ourselves. We must deny him his awakening to get to our own awakening. I know that he does this with awareness. It's not just an accident. You mentioned that you were losing Leo in the video when he talked about his most recent awakenings. Can you point out the timeframes when you were losing him? I am curious to see if I can see it for myself. I usually only listen to the audio. I get the feeling that what Leo was doing so far was chasing the Peak non-dial experiences. After each breakthrough, he was trying to stabilize at the peak of the experience, more than the ground of the experience. Going forward, perhaps it would be better to integrate the experiences and stabilize more towards the ground, otherwise, he will lose the ground with the "normal people". Also, Leo puts too much importance on the psychedelic aspect and disregards the years of work and studying that is necessary to properly understand the psychedelic experience. If some naive kids start doing 5 Meo DMT without doing the work, they will do more harm to themselves than good. I agree with you that Leo has an important role in the collective awakening, and he is playing his part the best he can. But we can't awaken the collective when the individuals are asleep. The content that he is producing is already life-changing and beneficial, and it will be terrible if he decides to take the wrong turn. I agree with you on that. But I have faith that he will stay on the right track. His Life is his own Hero Jurney, and he must rescue the Father from the belly of the whale. You can already see how much Leo has changed in the past 7 years. The transformation is amazing. I wonder where Leo sees himself in the next 7 years? Maybe its time to communicate the vision for the next 7 years? @Leo Gura

I looked up suffering in A Course in Miracles and found: Amazing. Yay! ACIM says do NOT accept sacrifice and do NOT accept suffering. This seems to be a form of jnana yoga which means the path of the intellect if I have understood it correctly. It's about using the intellect for spiritual transformation.

@Leo Gura Control or no control, Ego or no ego: the heightened mood is still an intense experience. I have grown and learned a lot from my hormones and how they change me and I by no means hate them. Usually after the storm the calm allows for deep transformation and it has helped me become who so am in this moment. My hormones feel like a nasty mushroom trip tbh. During intense, but after hugely empowering. I notice I feel less emotionally secure during, and my actions don’t match my heart. I notice I react without thinking and sometimes harshly and rashly. It is as if my Body on extra hormones overpowers the meditation and spiritual work I’ve done. During it feels like so have put in no work at all. I attempted mediation this morning and ended up just crying a crap ton throughout. I guess without controlling it, how do I change it?

@WHO IS As I said; words. I'm just describing how it feels. I could probably express it in another way... but why? This is how it seems most appropriate/accurate at this moment. No difference. All difference @Consilience Cool. Maybe I'm hyping it up. Still, I don't think we're talking about the same kind of transformation.

I wrote this article a few days ago. It relates directly to healing our world, our environment, our government and our politics. Division is our problem, unity is the answer. I have a dream where we all got together despite our differences. Just to see if we could. Imagine how powerful/impactful we would be if we organized. Anyway I know this little article isn't going to do anything, but it's a start to something bigger I'm working on. I hope you enjoy ❤️ ---- “Ask me no questions, I will tell you no lies.. careful what you wish for. We’re looking for angels in the darkest of skies, saying that we wanted more." - CHVRCHES We all have the ability to transform our world, right now. I’m not asking for a miracle. It can be done using truth and love alone.. directed simultaneously inward as well as out. Together. We possess no precedent which exists on the scale of this transformation. But the hour is late, and the time is now. We can no longer operate from the same level of thinking which created the mess we’re in. We already know what we know.. now I’m asking us to reach outside the bounds of perception, and seek to see the unseen. To all beings of this dying Earth experience, hear these words: We’ve lost our way. We’ve forgotten our truth. We’ve severed our connection to spirit. We’ve forgotten what it feels like to dissolve the lines between perception and the perceived. When we look out upon the world, we see opposition and competition. When the rulers look back upon us, they see consumption and production. But this is not who we are. This is that which is mortal, finite, and will eventually die. It knows only survival. It knows only fear. It knows only yesterday and tomorrow. But the now is hidden. Hidden behind the fundamental fear of death and all that comes with it. In the name of this fear, we have created a great web of darkness and suffering that stretches and consumes every inch of our planet. We are all contributors in ways we cannot see. Everything is connected to everything. Our only defense against the pain we do see is more ignorance, of which we have perfected the art. We don’t even realize the extent of the situation we are in, because we’ve been indoctrinated to ignore, distract and numb out the truth of our reality. But the Universe will not tolerate this any longer. This part of us that fears life; this part that is mortal and finite.. is coming to an end. This means the end of life as we know it. But there is another part of us. A part which is the whole. A part which knows nothing of fear. None of it. It’s the single greatest source of infinite inspiration, creativity, and love. Infinite love has no bounds. It is out beyond ideas of right and wrong. Differences mean nothing to infinite love. It knows that life is not a zero sum game.. that the Universe was designed to provide abundantly for all beings. It’s only a matter of choice. "You can change this ride anytime you want. It’s only a choice. No effort, no work, no job, no savings of money. A choice, right now.. between fear, and love." - Bill Hicks Division is our problem, and unity is the answer we’ve been searching for. Within and without. We must put aside our differences and come together, right now. From the heart. As one people. For no other reason than to see if we could. And we must be led by love. No more fear. No more separation. Only truth. Only connection. We must step down from the throne of self-righteousness, even if we think we’re right, and step up to endless compassion and forgiveness for others, even if we think they’re wrong. Don’t distract by fighting each other while we let the corporate and government demons run a muck. We don’t need them to solve this for us. We have the power. We’ve had it all along. But we let them tell us we’re too small. Too weak. Too different. Open your eyes. We’re far more alike than different, don’t you see? We could agree on so much good if we just got together as one people. This is not a fairy-tale. This is a life path potential in the quantum field that is infinite possibility. We are all artists. So let’s go play. Paint. Our will is our brush, and the canvas is the experience we choose to make manifest. Use your existing gifts to spread this message. Don’t be shy. Share this everywhere you can think of, even if it’s anonymous. Show the world what a real virus looks like. We have everything it takes, right now, to ascend to the highest of highs. The pieces are all there; and I know that the pieces fit. Step forward and heed the call, because the world desperately needs your help. The time is now ❤️. “I’m not asking for a miracle. But if love is enough, could you let it show? If you feel it, could you let me know?“ - CHVRCHES #loveisenough ———— JOIN HERE ————

Yes, some people in the non-duality communities have this neo-advaita-rhetoric that makes no sense, they are basically just nihilists or mind-dwellers. They think denying that they are the body makes them free but it's just a belief-system, not an actual transformation. I'm not bothered by them though, and I'm glad there are some people on this forum who have genuinely awakened.

?? jump on second hand websites . lots of people upgreat their pc and sell their 2019 pc dirt cheap, or just go to some friend with a great PC and pay him 10€ to let you play for a whole day and get your fix, something along these lines. if gaming is what you want to keep doing. for me what helped was realizing that every time i sit at my PC to play League of Legends, I'm just skipping time, nothing else. This exact moment and situation I find myself in, I will stay in, for as long as I keep playing. So imagine yourself at 25, playing Cyberpunk 2077. then yourself at 35, playing cyberpunk 2088. then yourself at 45 playing cyberpunk 2099. In the same house. in the same job. with the same friends. etc. this may help you to get some leverage. If not, that's okay. the desire to change must come from within. " guilt " may be used as leverage but only deep intrinsic inspiration will get you some sort of transformation

Go do some research on what the top artists are doing and what are the cutting edges of style and aesthetic. Skill is one thing to develop and the other is style, which can only be found by exploration. When you explore you begin to take new ideas and approaches to art. Consciousness might be your general idea, but pick a few others and combine them and see what happens. For example, here some topics: - The shadow side of consciousness - The need of suffering and death for transformation of one's consciousness - The paradox of consciousness See what Im doing? I'm not just taking "consciousness and its symbols" as a topic (which I feel is the topic you're picking: the eye, the dalai lama, the light, the tree) but I'm taking contrasting ideas to add on top of "consciousness". You really need to go out of your own box, try new processes, colors, strokes, tools, composition styles, narratives, meanings, symbols, etc. Maybe you know the WHY of your art but need to play more with the HOW of your art. If you follow the same process you'll get the same result. Do experimentation with your process and you'll never EVER run out of ideas to work on.

Leo's most recent video about forgiveness has the core principles: 1. People who hurt you in the past did so because of ignorance. 2. They hurt you because they were trying to get love (from you or somebody else) but had limited, unhealthy ways to get it. 3. They hurt you because their level of consciousness was very low. 4. They hurt you because of their selfishness. 5. They hurt you for their survival agenda. That basically means people who hurt you in the past did so because of selfishness and ignorance. And this is true. If you don't see this, it means you have not done enough introspection and have not developed enough awareness of your past pain (and anger). He said being able to forgive is strength and not being able to is weakness. I think both are strength. His video is useful and effective to people who ordinarily got hurt or hurt as an adult. For example, the forum administrator banned you, another is, your boss unfairly fired you. But to that little 6-year-old japanese girl who was repeatedly dragged by his father by the neck from the entrance door to the bathroom and then brutally punched and kicked til blood comes out of her nose and mouth; to the child Teal Swan who was repeatedly sodomized or "analized" by an older family member, to the child me who was enormously mentally-emotionally wounded by his dumb father by being completely ignored and screamed at his entire childhood and teenage years, that forgiveness video is far from enough to heal the wounds, and even adds more harm. If you are in the "second category". You need a deeper perspective and understanding of your pain, anger, and forgiveness. 1. Forgiveness is the letting go of anger, that is, the letting go of the desire for revenge or justice. It is not when you say "I forgive you" to your business partner then suing him for screwing you. Forgiveness is when you say "I forgive you" to your business partner then say "And to prove that, I won't sue you or harm you in any way though you betrayed me.". It is not when you proclaim to everybody in the court "I am a true Christian, so I forgive this psychopath who murdered my daughter and your daughters." But then celebrate when the jury decides to give the death penalty to the serial killer. Those are just empty words, not forgiveness. 2. Complete forgiveness is reconciliation. It is the letting go of anger, that is, the letting go of the desire for revenge or justice, and starting a good relationship with your abuser again. So that means not only suing the business partner who screwed you, but to have another business deal with him again. That means to end the "no contact" situation you have with your NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) father or mother and start visiting or even living with them again. It is obvious this is dangerous. Complete forgiveness or reconciliation should only be given to people who love you though they might have hurt you a few times. It should never be given to people who have NPD or Stage Red or to people who hate you though they might have done a few good things to you. 3. Your anger is valid and must be honored. Don't demonize your anger. Don't believe them when they tell you you are a bad, evil person for holding anger. Anger is a valid response to harmful things done to you. It doesn't mean you should hold your anger until death. It simply means allow it to exist and understand it has an important function. And the paradox is, it is the acknowledgment and honoring of pain and anger which breaks the trans-generational wound transfer. I mean directing the anger at your parents or abusers then naturally letting it go, not forcefully. If you direct it at random innocent people because you lack awareness of it, you will transfer that pure shit to your children. 4. Forgiveness is a result of the healing of the mental-emotional wounds, not the other way around. You can't force forgiveness even if you want to. It will only lead to suppression. If you force yourself to forgive somebody who deeply broke your spirit, you might be able to do so for a few weeks. But the anger will still be deeply there. And it will be alive and kicking in your mind and body again in a few months if you become conscious of it. If not, it will run in the "background" of your mind and behavior. You will unconsciously hurt yourself and others. 5. Unconscious or disowned pain and anger manifests as physical and mental diseases. If that pain and anger is enormous but "unconscious", it manifests as mysterious bodily pains, cancer, anxiety, and depression. I have experienced this. My early adulthood anxiety and suicidal depression immediately disappeared after acknowledging my enormous pain and anger. Of course I did great inner work to accomplish it. It was completely difficult but it was worth it. 6. Learn the lesson of your pain and anger so you can then naturally and gradually release it. Beneath the pain and anger is deep wisdom. If you choose to welcome it and work on it, you will have a deep understanding of yourself and the humans who caused it. Through it, you will be a more self-loving person who sets boundaries. If you have been extremely and disgustingly abused by your parents during childhood, that means you are an adult person who has low self-love, low self-esteem, and a doormat. 7. The healing of your wounds is directly proportional to your capability to be at peace with your painful, imperfect past. This is where forgiveness can sprout from. You can implement the concepts above by doing the exercise Leo described in his video. But add this step. Write the details of what exactly happened, how you felt about it, and what you should have done and said during that time. Say that to yourself while writing or typing it on MS-Word or OneNote. And feel the deep pain and hatred engulfing your body. You need to be alone when doing this. The best thing is to do that for every painful or traumatic memory you have. But if it's impossible, just cover at least 70 percent of all your traumatic memories. Make sure to include your most traumatic memories. Be patient and persevere. You will feel very bad and angry in the first few weeks or months of doing this. But just continue. And observe your anxiety, depression or physical problems gradually disappear. That exercise is very powerful. If your anger stays alive for more than a year, that's ok. Consider the other possibilities. If you don't do the inner work, you will continue to suffer (anxiety, depression, physical problems, etc,) for 20,30 or 50 years until you die. Or you murder yourself now because you can't bear the suffering anymore. That was the inner work I did aside from developing self-love to accomplish great self-transformation. Before I was a young adult with very low self-esteem, low self-confidence, low self-love, much self-hate, had pure O, BDD, agoraphobia, and crippling depression. Now, I am the exact opposite. I am 10 years older but still a young adult and with strong, unshakable self-love, high self-confidence, and slight to no anxiety and depression. And I feel good about myself. I still have some anger but greatly reduced. How did I develop self-love? I might share it in the future. I am already too tired to make another long post. I don't know whether psychedelics helps in healing trauma and in forgiving your abusers. I have never tried any psychedelics. And I don't know whether the "existential" perspective of forgiveness is the ultimate solution. I can't see I am God imagining existence, I am infinite love, and I am all there is. That sounds just like an interesting, beautiful story to me.

The role of the Rakshas gana. This person will not be humble or sweet. This person is going to be powerful like Kali. Able to bring major changes. The Deva gana will bring a transformation in the Loka through persecution and invoking goodness. Meanwhile Rakshasa similar to Kali or Kalki avatar will bring the end of Kaliyug. They will bring the Satya Yug with their powerful force. They love and protect the prince or the swan. But to protect the prince, they need to get their hands dirty in the mud. So they are the ones who do the dirty job for the prince by learning strategies and tactics to destroy evil. And they can be considered bad or their reputation soiled because of their not so subtle and intense violent representations, yet they are needed to destroy evil, to do the dirty work, to take out suffering, to put someone out of their misery, to protect the good, and to deal with the dirt and the bad/evil and the garbage. So you could enjoy your carpet in the clouds. In some ways they are the gatekeepers of the kingdom and the gutter cleaners and morgue keepers. Although they are demonized because they don't appear as loving and charming as a lotus or a Swan, they are very useful in maintaining the order of the universe by fighting evil with intimidation. You could compare them to the exorcists of the world.

@JessiChell I'd recommend looking for someone who's hungry for consciousness work and inner transformation. This is a life-time work so consistency across time is one good indicator. When I met my wife, she was already doing inner work for 4 years and that's why we matched. Make good use of your initial stages and try lots of different things before you have to fight against the crystallization of your "spiritual concepts". For instance, check this out:

My pleasure. But you are probably not doing the "trauma MS Word or OneNote exercise" and probably not actively developing strong, unshakable self-love. Honesty, especially self-honesty is very important in self-transformation.

@Leo Gura Gracias, amigo! @Nahm Thanks, man! I've started trying myself as a coach 1.5 years ago and I really liked this medium and already making a decent income from that. For the most part, my specifics right now is to help the green young guys and girls add a little more structure to their lives and begin to become aware of the processes at the meta level. My plan is to move to the Netherlands, get a master's degree in psychology and get a legal opportunity to use psychedelics in working with clients. Most of all I want to work with leaders - my vision is to help leaders become yellow and turquoise, so that they can provide very high-quality transformations in the world. I'm not so much interested in working with traumas and dysfunctions than working with actualization and transcendence (transpersonal psychology) with the help of my work and psychedelics. Qualitative development and transformation of identity. I really like the image of the sanatorium, in which strong leaders come in order to "refresh" or learn something or work on further development in a spiral. However, I am not a team player at all and I don’t really like the image of owning a big business and workers. The approach of the lone master is closer to me. The biggest obstacle that currently stands in front of me is that I need to start attract an income for myself, with which I can save money for education and moving to the Netherlands, in addition to ensuring monthly expenses. To do this, I need to establish a flow of customers and create additional products that can be sold in parallel with consultations (online courses, webinars, etc.). Now I think a lot about coming up with some elegant way to marketing my services on the Internet. One of my main strengths is humor and playfulness. The other four are spirituality, perspective wisdom, optimism and future-mindedness, love of learning. Besides spirituality and abstract thinking I am very good at using my sense of humor (in my opinion it's the sub-skill from the abstract thinking) while working with clients and, in general, in life. Also, to be honest, it'll be a lie for me to say that I'm waking up highly motivated right now, because I'm trying to find my own, original, inspiring and innovative niche. As you can see, there is a tendency among forum participants to become a psychotherapist using psychedelics, a shaman, a psychonaut, etc. I'm really thinking about the integration of the Humor + Self-dev, not as a comic. but as a humorous self-dev master. George Carlin x Leo Gura = ?

@Cocolove thank you! That’s great hear you have some background knowledge on Wilber’s work. He is a truely inspiring visionary. I might aim at reading all of those and start with the integral transformation ?

@StarStruck Was the seminar online? Which programm? Transformation Mastery?

Never underestimate mushrooms... Set – To become conscious of God Setting – My backyard/Room on a sunny day Intro How can I even truly articulate what I experienced yesterday? There have been these mild intellectual skirmishes on the forum lately talking about the role psychedelics play in enlightenment or lack thereof. For the most part, I’ve stayed off the fence because I truly DON’T know what role these substances play with awakening. You’ve got the Ralston camp going on about how Enlightenment, Truth isn’t an experience and therefore taking a psychedelic which changes experience cannot deliver the truth to you and then on the other end you’ve got the Leo camp ignoring these claims and seriously pursuing psychedelic work. Yet after this trip, I just don’t know how one could ever argue they don’t play a role unless they lack the direct experience of God realization on a psychedelic. I have no doubt meditation, contemplation, and yoga can facilitate these insights to a massive degree, but it will take a massive amount of time to deliver what these mushrooms showed. Let me explain. It’s odd because normally mushrooms get really twisty, kind of funny and confusing with the way they deliver insights. Yet this trip, my mind was sharp, clear and open in contrast with the usual twisty nature. There were no real visual effects other than a mild increase in sharpness to objects and colors. To be quite honest I hardly felt like I was tripping at all up until the peak. Fear Opening the Mind So over the course of 4 hours there was this subtle anxiety and fear that was accumulating in my mind. I started feeling all of these insecurities and fears bubbling up. I felt overwhelmed by my college debt, I felt weak from my chronic illness, I felt like my life purpose was going to be a complete failure. It was interesting watching these emotions build slowly, slowly slowly… I was able to sit with the pretty successfully and just watch unattached to them using basic mindfulness principles. I don’t think I was aware of how deep rooted they were in my subconscious though, but it seems I really believe myself to be a failure. Yet as this fear grow bolder (presumably as the psychedelic effects grew stronger) the fear’s root began to surface – The fear of death. Oddly enough these ‘surface’ level fears all stemmed ultimately from my fear of death. Death I remember just sitting outside alone contemplating my own death, contemplating the meaninglessness of my individual life, feeling the reality that in a thousand years all of this life would be gone. Humanity will have long forgotten me, and in all likelihood, all of my contributions will be but a grain of sand to the transformation of the species. Of course my life plays a pivotal role in the infinite chain of causation, however it is utterly impermanent. My mind then started scaling not to thousands of years, but millions of years in this universe’s lifetime. I was somehow able to conceptualize into a higher tier of time and not merely think, but FEEL the emptiness of my life in reality’s lifespan. A great sadness washed over my being. At this point I went into my room and laid down in silence, just staring into my ceiling. A Glimpse of God As I was staring into this empty ceiling feeling the void of my life, all of my loved ones, of humanity itself, I was struck with the most powerful nondual insight of my life. I burst into tears whaling as I realized how I am all beings, every last perspective of consciousness in all possible realities, my being was coming to terms with the enormity of what these implications really meant, that I was responsible for this Universe, that I was this moment of eternity, and that I would experience every last possible variation of possible perspectives. Not only will I experience lifetime after lifetime after lifetime, I’ve done this for eternity. Fucking eternity. I felt my self violently explode into awareness, tears where streaming down my face, and I literally started drooling because of how much infinity I became conscious of. It was heart wrenching, terrifying, utterly absolute Love and terror. It felt like I was going through some sort of childbirth process where I was contracting and releasing into fear and love simultaneously. It was utter infinity, utter emptiness. I was whaling in ecstasy, sadness, love. My body temperature rose and began sweating everywhere. My hands, face, legs, feet, where all damp, all muscles where firing and releasing energy as I felt the enormity of what I am. My body would scrunch up into a child’s pose and then open back up in release. It was the most powerful experience I’ve ever had of God and it only lasted around 10 minutes total. I don’t think such a body reaction is necessary, but if one is not prepared for the enormity of Truth, there’s no telling how the ego-body-mind structure will react. Mine reacted in some sort of hurricane of psycho-physical-energetic contraction and release BECAUSE I’ve never truly seen this shit. Not to the extent of yesterday. I’ve had glimpse of God before both sober and tripping, but nothing like this. Nothing even close. I then spent about an hour just chilling in this massively increased state of awareness processing what the fuck I’d just gone through. Take aways: I realize now that the mind shields itself from the Self to colossal degrees. I already knew the mind acts a shied from Truth, but I really only yesterday felt the power of this mechanism firsthand. If the mind where truly able to remain in this state forever, I’m not sure survival would be possible. This is why I am unsure of whether Ralston’s perspective is correct. Yes you can awaken to yourself while sober; in fact the majority of my awakening process has been from meditation and contemplation. I see very clearly the illusory nature of self, the will of the Universe playing out in every moment, the love and compassion I authentically feel for life and all beings. Yet after this trip I see now the distinction between awakening to your true self and UNDERSTANDING your true self. I see now why Leo talks about understanding. I’m not sure this level of understanding is possible without psychedelics. The thing is, this was only 2g of mushrooms, never mind 5-MeO or a higher dose. As horrific and amazing as this understanding was, I intuited very clearly that this was only the tip of the iceberg. The depth to Truth is kind of terrifying to consider and until one has a heavy dose of themselves, they won’t understand. Was this “experience” temporary? Yes. As new aged as this may sound though, I feel an energetic shift in my being. I’ve felt this from all the trips I do. They truly change one’s energy system and the experience stays with you, changes you. It’s similar to how once you’ve had sex, you forever have an understanding about a facet of reality that no amount of masturbation, porn, or foreplay can replicate. Today I feel at peace, and ease. I feel happy and equanimous. I feel strong and I feel incredible fortunate to have been given this gift, this level of understanding. Another thing I wanted to mention – My intuition tells me that my meditation and hatha yoga practice played a key role with how I was able to receive such a powerful breakthrough on such a low dose of psychedelics. I see a lot of people questioning the effectiveness of more traditional consciousness practices, but from what I can tell, they all feed off one another. So if you’re reading this and are interested in pursuing psychedelics, but don’t have a strong, grounded sober practice, I would encourage you to begin there. 1 hour of meditation a day will radically change your life.

transformation evolution spiraling to infinity and beyond

Took the test. Am a four apparently. Though not sold on it enough for the twenty $ yet. I have been interested in these personality type things (MBTI, Big Five, etc...) for some time, and they revealed solid insights to me, but even though they were helpful vessels for understanding myself, understanding myself always happens beyond any such labels. They function as observations that can only capture still lifes of something very lively and changing. From there I proceed in my true, intimate and direct investigations. I have recently come to a point from where seeking just no longer seems viable. The end of exclusive identification (not entirely solidified) and the understanding that I am nothing in particular has produced a great sense of freedom and peace. My behavior and daily conduct however has not changed that much, which was expected because the separate self's conditioning runs deeper in the body. I will now give my body the time it needs to catch up and heal on it's own term out of a desire to conduct my behaviour with love, and peace at it's source rather than the goal. This desire feels so warm and deeply affectionate I just teared up a little. Anyway, I started putting closer attention to personality and what it is made of. Different people who have gained mastery in this path report different results. Adyashanti says that at the end a very basic personality structure will remain. Matt Kahn says that once one has completely transcended the world she comes back into the body and back into the personality under the realization that there is absolutely no separation between the Absolute and Relative. Peter Ralston however seems to imply that at the end of what he calls transformation there are no attachments left whatsoever. I am curious to see how all this will unfold in my life, thus far it a mystery I am excited to uncover. I would like to hear your opinion on personality. Have a good day, my friend

Hello all. I hope you've done the exercises listed above and have some good experiences and made you motivated to continue visualizing. For me, I've done them and found them easy, especially exercises 1, 3, and 4. I made 1 more challenging by drawing the tree I remembered seeing a couple of years ago before the neighbor chopped it down, with pencil, and visualizing myself walking around this tree I've drawn in 3d, with the graphite texture, color and smell still on it instead of a real-life tree, inside the picture itself. With 3, I just walked around my Japanese back garden, while the radio in the garage playing 90\s songs, I replayed dreamscape songs like 'Trance', Born to be wasted', 'You can do anything', and some songs from Three Days Grace and Luna Remix within my mind. I've worked on my visualization skills for so long it seems I have nearly forgotten how hard it really is. I once really struggled to mentally listen to a song while a song from an outside source was playing, and sometimes had blurs or wonky forms of mental pictures. Let's move on to section 1 of developing your visualization: mind's eye. For some, this is also referred to as the third eye chakra or Ajna chakra. Others would say it's the occipital lobes in the brain responsible for processing visual perception. Regardless, it is my belief that without a strong mind's eye, or even the existence of the mind's eye, you would be severely limited in your ability to achieve goals in your life. Not just in general parts of your life, but also when you want to go deeper with it. Some spiritual traditions use some practices, like Yantras or complex Mandalas, that targets your ability to see an object in your mind. There are even paranormal abilities/supernatural aspects related to the mind's eye, like clairvoyance or perceiving spirits. And so much more I can't cover them all here, but I hope I've piqued your interest. If you're interested in developing a tulpa, an imaginary close companion, then a strong mind's eye is important when, if you want to, to be able to superimpose their form onto your visual perception and see it move around in reality. I'll further elaborate on this advanced form of visualization later in the next stage, developing your tulpa, once you've worked through stage 1of developing your visualizations. However, if you don't resonate, that's ok. Just stage 1 of developing visualization is still useful for life. There are lots of options to develop later with a strong mind's eye, but if you still struggle to see mental images, they're blurry or lose color or lose resolution, then it's crucial you still work on identifying each visual weakness and do isolation training on each one. Before I list some new exercises, I would recommend picking up a drawing activity and/or board game like chess or Chinese Go as a leisure hobby and supplementary training for mental images. Because of these activities, I've progressed further with mental images. I've written instructions on the original post, so here are some changes: if you can do 5-10 minutes, increase by 5 minutes for each exercise (or 1 if you're really struggling), and please feel free to add another exercise appropriate to what you're working on, in this case, it's relevant to vision. However, if you wish, go multi-sensory on some exercises, but beware that you won't progress slightly faster than another that uses deliberate practice on each element of visualization. Exercise 1: Rippling water. Begin this exercise after a meditation session is complete, and your in a meditative state. Imagine, within your eye lid's darkness, a pond. Now imagine drops of water, on at a time, impacting the pond's surface, and follow each ripple created. Then gradually increase the rate of speed, and increase the volume of drops until you can visualize rainfall and clearly see each ripple on the pond. Now gradually slow time, taking in the flow of the raindrops and ripples until all is paused in time. Now, rewind the process slowly, and gradually increase to a comfy speed, while noting every raindrop and ripple reversing. Repeat this cycle 2-3 times or more if you want. Exercise 2: Burning leaves. Begin after a meditation session. In a meditative state, begin imagining an ember. From the ember, imagine the burning rope below it, then the puddle of liquid wax, and finally the rest of the candle and candle holder. now imagine a plate with a leaf. Pick it, set it onto the ember so that it starts to burn, and place it on the plate. Observe it burning until ashes. Now rewind time, at the same speed, and watch it closely until it stops at the point you placed it on the plate. Repeat, gradually adding leaves until you need a barrel to burn the bundles of leaves and un-burn them. Exercise 3: Cooking a salad. Begin after a meditation session. Imagine a pan lined with a thin layer of oil, and already heated enough to start cooking. Now visualize an already chopped-to-pieces melon, apple, grapes, and kiwi. Notice each fruit's colors, and slid them off of the cutting board and into the frying pan. The main thing to visualize is the burning of the fruits as you stir them every now and then and the changes to their colors, how the pigments darken. This is optional, but feel free to use multiple senses, including the cackling of the oil and water, different sweet-smelling aromas, how each piece of fruit feel like, emotionally, undergoing this transformation process, maybe regretting passing judgments onto other fruits with a different sense of humor, or maybe the apple is relieved to change appearance, or what it's like for fruits to have emotions, etc. Take it until all are roasted, and, you guessed it, rewind the entire process backward and forwards. Notice how the pigments lighten up with color. If you took the multi-sensory path, notice especially how the reversal affects the emotions. Exercise 4: Orbiting orbitals. Begin after a meditation session. In a meditative state, bring to mind a colored ball of vibrating energy. Imagine it moving in a sort of circular motion around you and sometimes in front of you. Then imagine a different colored ball, sharing a similar orbiting pattern to the first ball. Increase until you have about 4 or so balls around you. Now imagine when one ball touches the other, it shares it's coloring briefly, giving birth to a smaller colored ball with both parent's colors, blended well on some spots, and some not. Keep going until you can't keep track of the balls, then reserve time to any point in the middle of these colors manifesting similar colors and freeze time. To conclude, I want to tell you that visualizing isn't always easy, regardless if you're born gifted. I've disclosed this before years ago elsewhere, but I'm not that gifted with picture-perfect mental imagery and had a small degree of mental blindness. Furthermore, a decade or so ago, I've been in a near-fatal accident that made me partially blind on each eye, further making things difficult to see. I persisted anyway, despite the limitation of the scars on my central vision, to work on my mind's eye until I can confidently say for myself that I can visually, near-perfectly see, the objects and situations in my mind with near realistic depictions, despite my eye's limitation. So, even if you feel you don't resonate with what I offer and move on, I strongly urge you to not leave behind your strong will, conviction, and persistence. And regardless of other's opinions of tulpas I've heard in real life and internet, it's still a blessing to have been affected by this in my life, and I want to share this blessing because I've felt some benefits from it that could have a similar effect on those that are open-minded, and for those that had experienced similar things I've been through, and to possibly experience a deeper sense of empathy. For people that resonate, don't stop and continue working on yourself. Have a good week, and destiny is all!