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The only way out i can think of is suicide
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axiom replied to Baotrader's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
For siloed consciousness (i.e. you as a human), physical pain happens whenever you push closer to the boundary of self. Pain lets you know where those boundaries are. For example, in the movie The Truman Show, Truman's emotional pain massively increased the closer he got to escaping the dome. A hand held over a flame for long enough will be maximally painful because pretty quickly it will no longer be a hand, and eventually it will burn away into nothing at all. Physical pain is only troubling to the individual, and only as long as the individual believes itself to be there. From a higher consciousness, physical pain is on the same ontological level as a chair, a table, an oak tree, or a cloud passing in the sky. It is possible to observe pain from the outside, and react to it as you might react to a cloud passing in the sky. It is within everyone's grasp to experience this phenomenon directly with strong-determination-sitting meditation (SDS). Actually, SDS can completely recalibrate your sense of what it means to suffer by enormously increasing your emotional and physical pain tolerance. In so doing, if kept up, then eventually (and inevitably) it leads to total bliss, total love, total compassion. Suicide is pointless. You'll just find yourself somewhere else, and you'll have to deal with all of this again (and again, and again). No fear, enlightenment eventually comes to everyone. EDIT: Just realised this thread goes back to 2018... -
Thursday 24/03/2022 06:45 My desire is too strong that I cannot kill myself. But the stronger my desire for sex, the more painful my experience. The more I consider suicide the more I suffer, bringing up the pain of unrequited desire. Considering suicide is also painful because of the feelings of shame that inevitably come from it. I'm royally fucked either way, in all ways but literal. This suicidality is similar to but not identical to September. I had to painfully see back then that 'I don't really want to die'. The way I'm feeling now is more similar to January, more specifically. "I don't really want to die" experientially translates to "my desire is extremely strong (and it clings to life)". Choice however does not dwell in the feeling. There appear to be two choices here. One, kill yourself. Two, suffer with the desire painfully, for who knows how long and for how often. I am familiar enough with this painful desire that I may have the capacity to not be swayed and move ahead with what's logical. I know that if I lack such a capacity though I'll hate myself again. I won't be swayed by fear of re-incarnation either. What I'm addicted to is this juice of being helpless and ruminating —— I'm quite squeamish at the sight of blood and I'm scared of doing something to my body that will cause damage should I fail. I'm trapped with nothing I can do. Why wasn't I given the right to end my life? And what's this feeling? I can swallow sodium nitrite just fine and that process will be painless, but its my feelings which are the issue. Many times before, something like this shame has cropped up. It kills my horniness in an abrupt way. I can be "conscious" of something, as far as that word can mean anything, but that doesn't mean I'm given a morsel of control or reduction in suffering. I feel conscious of some feeling relating to death, shame and decay which is wretched and terrible, like a bouquet of dead flowers. How evil a thing there is! It could be described as like a negative libido in inception.
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WelcometoReality replied to Preety_India's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
I think it's great that your willing to see these flaws and take action toward healing. Shaming is more negativity which creates a neverending loop or in the worst cases it ends in self hatred and suicide. Letting go of these feelings will instead create a neverending loop of positivity into love and self transcendence. -
Almost no mental illnesses are terminal. Terminal doesn't just mean life-long. The only mental illnesses that are terminal I can think of are Dementia / Alzheimers and severe depression (the latter assuming suicide is pretty much inevitable.) If you're defining a terminal mental illness as just one you've got for life, that's most of them. Schizophrenia, autism, anxiety. Depends on the severity of it I guess. I guess technically I'm already probably living with multiple terminal mental illnesses according to this definition, but not bad enough that I want to bother seeking help. I guess the first steps would be therapy and medication.
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Preety_India replied to Preety_India's topic in Society, Politics, Government, Environment, Current Events
You don't judge them. But Indian society does. In fact a rape victim is sometimes encouraged to commit suicide Because in the Indian mindset a woman with no husband has no identity. A woman violated is better off dead. A son who doesn't earn the salary of a doctor is a worthless person and a failure in the eyes of the parents. A single mother is a brainless slut who gave her virginity to the wrong man and deserves lovelessness and loneliness and every bit of suffering coming to her. Any person in Our society who doesn't satisfy expectations that are set ridiculously high are to be shamed and judged and abandoned into anonymity and should deserve nothing but disdain, contempt and suffering. How will you feel in such a society? That's why the suicides Half of the suicides don't get reported. -
The picture is a call for help. Distancing is likely to worsen the condition. Suicide often but certainly not exclusively, comes from loneliness. So i'd personally want to do my best to get them help but also tell them they can't send pictures of that anymore, they can't do that to themselves anymore, as its horrific and they REALLY NEED HELP RIGHT NOW. I'd go and find a few specialists or counselors, get a few numbers and even make a call myself telling a professional about the picture I was just sent. Maybe even the police if it was advised. If you want to be with them through the process that's a different thing, it sounds like you are not comfortable with that, and so you've got to respect yourself too. Your boundaries, what you will and won't do. I once had a friend with Asperger's, some aspects of that friendship I loved but I had to set strict limits on how much time I would spend with them, as they tended to draw me in to their life more than I wanted. Its about finding a balance, but definitely make a couple of calls and tell someone about that photo.
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StudentX replied to Someone here's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
Death is not an experience, because death is the dis-identification with a particular form, i.e. with thought. That's why ego-death is death and not at all "flimsy". It's literally death, not some sort of second-order kind of death, it is the death. There is absolutely no need for suicide, or for harming the body in any way whatsoever; this would presuppose that you are the body, which is false. Do NOT harm the body. To truly die means to understand that you were never alive. -
To me it seems that the only way to know what death is or what comes after death is by actually dying. You can't know it unless you experience it .is that correct ? Can you become conscious of what death is without needing to commit suicide ? P.S I'm talking actual physical death not some flimsy ego death or whatnot .
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LastThursday replied to Someone here's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
@Someone here practically, the suicide rate is very low something like 0.01%. It can't be used as a good argument for happiness and truth being anything to do with living. But you are right, happiness is not one-dimensional and neither is truth, they have many sources and qualities. How can you judge if one type of happiness is equal or better than one type of truth and that those things are essential for living? -
Someone here replied to Someone here's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
@LastThursday think about a person who commits suicide. He doesn't know what's true anymore and completely lost in confusion and he is not happy either obviously. If you are still alive right now then it means you either have some source of happiness in your life(no matter how trivial it might be ) or you know some satisfying truths. -
context we are not super close. but i do talk with him from time to time. we sometimes have some enjoyable conversations, but his mental state is off the rails. three weeks ago he attempted suicide. then the other day he called me when he was in the middle of a crisis. and two days ago, he simply sent me, out of nowhere, a picture of his wrists covered in blood. he had cut himself. he said he had a relapse because of his ex. i was in shock. i only send him something like: "i'm not the right person to help you in this moment. you need specialized help asap." this made me realize that i have to distance myself from him -- for my own mental health. my plan i thought about distancing myself in a gradual way. but especially after that picture he sent, he crossed a line that i don't think i should tolerate. so basically he's a person that i don't want to have any contact in my life anymore. so maybe it'd be better to send him a text explaining respectfully -- yet firmly -- why i decided to distance myself from him. and if he insists on interacting with me, i might take more serious measures (e.g., blocking). any thoughts? thanks!
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"Like you said, everything has its shadow side, and the shadow in you is what makes you hate it. If you enjoy hating the system, I don't want to stop you from doing that. It can be fun. If you feel like it's costing you a lot of energy, and you'd rather have peace of mind, you can integrate the shadow. Which is the process of finding and recognizing everything you hate "out there", somewhere in yourself, and then loving that" One of the members posted this and I thought it was pretty good and wanted to think about it some more. What is stuff that I have hated "out there"? People's confidence, brains, looks, arrogance, aggression, insults. Do I have that too? Sometimes I have confidence, sometimes brain, sometimes looks, sometimes arrogant, sometimes aggressive, sometimes insulting. I can be all of these things too. Sometimes it is the context of how we compare this to that where that looks bad to us but yet we don't have the mirror to maybe see that we do it too. Maybe we have not yet fully processed it. I can feel intimidated by those that have more looks, money, skills, info, etc. It feels like, oh they will dominate over me, I cannot compete. But we will never be the best at anything. There will tend to be stuff that is worse than us and stuff that is better than us. All of the things that I mentioned are temporary. Looks, money, skills, etc. - they all come and go. Seeing the futility in stuff coming and going can be helpful. .... The second group meeting that I attended seemed a bit somber. People shared stories of rape, child loss, fentanyl overdose epidemics, sexual abuse, etc. I look at my life and go wow. I have not had that. One woman said that fentanyl overdose is the leading cause of death on the west coast for people ages 18-49. She said she used to focus on suicide prevention but fentanyl overdose has exceeded that - people are taking it and don't realize that they are overdosing. I was thinking that the more we interact with, the more we read, the more variety of people we talk to, the more we may step into the world of sad, traumatic things. Spirituality has really helped me to try to be very complex with how I see things. ... I think I was not liking the woman's smile in the meeting. I don't know why. Not many others were smiling. Again I smile too. Sometimes I smile when it is totally unnecessary or inappropriate but that is what I am doing. It is really weird how we decide, oh I do not like this or that. Again, the feeling of feeling lower than others where when one is smiling, they seem strong. We are all going to die though. ... "When you write, you light a bonfire in the spirit world. It is dark there. Lost souls wander alone. Your inner flame flares up. And the lost souls gather near your light and heat. And they see the next artist at work and go there. And they follow the fires until they find their ways home." - Luis Alberto Urrea ... The feeling of insecurity, of not being good enough, of comparing ourselves to others - maybe the stuff we see in others we like about them? We say wow that is their superpower and we admire it? ABSOLUTE SECURITY IS FUTILE. We are not in control of everything and so insecurity will kinda ALWAYS happen. We see someone better and feel insecure and think DEATH. But yet we won't necessarily die. We say, we are weaker than them - look they are stronger and they can outlast me see - look they are better because of XYZ. Well, I am better because of ABC too so it is not apples and apples. .. Regarding fixing things so that we don't make the same mistake next time, umm.. (or switching it out rather than suppressing it) -Choosing to listen rather than suppressing listening. Choosing to see potential rather than suppressing negative thoughts. When something seems useless, we may quit listening and it could be during those times that it would have been useful but yet we quit. chit chat can be helpful for some but a waste of time for the entire group https://cogbtherapy.com/introduction-to-cbt
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PataFoiFoi replied to PataFoiFoi's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
@Leo Gura i understand what you are saying. But the thing is we are the cost for God experiencing this all encompassing love. Just be real with me would you Leo be a crippled human that lives as a slave in poverty and only experienced war and torture to only get butchered by a tyrant at the end if his life time and still call it Love? If it were so then anything that is happening has to be love even people commiting suicide from this forum. You can correct me if im missing any building blocks here. -
SgtPepper replied to PataFoiFoi's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
I have a more nuance approach personally. I do not think war, genocide, torture, or suicide is God's love. It exists because of God's love. but evil is born from the imagination forgetting or even intentionally denying itself. And in one sense suffering, kills your ego and helps you remember. -
One of the things I am thinking about is - when we do stuff, do we do it to get away from other stuff or do we do it because we are choosing to do it, or both? Like okay every pick will be at the opportunity cost of everything else. There could at every moment be a number one thing that we want to be doing in that exact moment but that may not necessarily be what we are doing. One of the things I started thinking about when it comes to negative thoughts is that it is not that they are not necessarily bad. Negative thoughts can identify problems, walls, confusion, questions, etc. and we can use that to create curiosity, growth, change, identify potential, etc. They can also be used for anxiety, depression, hopelessness, suicide, etc. too. Thoughts that disapprove of things will happen all the time and how we choose to use those thoughts can make a mile of a difference. We can find good and bad things in everything and people will have varying degrees of how good they are at this and it will also be based on how much they notice, are aware of, etc.
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I cant understand how to see Love in these things. Why would our higher Self create a human world full of tragedies and still call this love? I bet every spiritual guru wouldnt call these things loveable if they really would experience torture, war, genocide or suicide. Some Gurus might have trained to control Pain and their Emotions but these guys are just a minor exception. God just has to be a masochist and doesnt give a fuck what each human or being feels or experiences.
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Yarco replied to CuriousityIsKey's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
Death, and hope that you reincarnate as an earthworm or a plant, something with sufficiently low intellectual capacity that you don't have to worry about these things. Specifically, I think some schools of thought believe that committing suicide will make you reincarnate as a lower lifeform instead of progressing upward or staying as a human. Most of the things you seem to have a problem with are exclusively human in nature. Some animals still have to worry about social order, and you'll still have an interest in survival / self-preservation. But money, beauty, fame, drama, etc don't exist in nature. There's an estimated 10 quintillion insects on Earth vs 8 billion people, the odds are in your favor. -
I think we go back and forth from being strong and confident and able to be alone to feeling weak and lonely and unable to be alone. I think we go back and forth from taking the blame to blaming others. I think we go back and forth from being on track to being off track. I think we go back and forth from feeling good about stuff to feeling bad about stuff. The highs are great but we have to watch out for being cocky, mean, selfish. The low are hard and we have to watch out for breaking things, hurting others, suicide, anxiety, depression, giving up, ruining certain things, etc. Finding some sort of middle ground or having a method to use for when the pendulum swings too far in one direction can be helpful... such as - when I get low, I seek out people, the therapist, support groups, healthy food, walks, meditation, calm music, motivation, things to push me harder, etc. When I get too high, I seek out humility, gratitude, helping others, etc. I feel like, well both of those could be used at any time and at either end of the spectrum.
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Zelensky did not invade Russia, it's Putin who's hurting the global economy. He invaded another country because "Nazis". Even if Ukraine surrendered tomorrow, the sanctions will still go through. So your whole argument is "Stop the fighting now, so to fight in the future using guerilla warfare tactics." You realize that a country that is constantly in a conflict has more to lose right? Did Vietnam develop economically while fighting the French and Americans in guerilla warfare? Did Yugoslavia under Nazi rule? Did China in the civil war? The list goes on and on. People will still die if they resort to guerilla warfare, and don't expect Russia to pour money into Ukraine for reconstruction and development and don't expect the West to pour money in a Russian puppet state. People in an economically deprived country that is under a constant sense of threat since there is guerilla warfare going on will not flourish. It's not just human lives we're talking about, it's quality of life, which matters a whole lot more than you might think it does. Quality of life determines whether you stay stuck in development, have mental or physical illnesses or commit suicide or not. It's either fight for a better life, flee in the West, or live in shit from the Ukrainian POV if you'd like. You can't expect them all to flee or live in shit. What you are arguing for it's not wisdom as you fancy, it's betraying his people.
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Yes. I'm only gonna name books which I've read from start to finish myself. 1.) You are the placebo - Dr. Joe Dispenza I love this book. It's one of the most interesting and empowering books I've ever read. It's a book that ties together the sciences of epigenetics, psychoneuroimmunology and things like trauma, consciousness and even god (the unified field, the "void" etc.). It also explains how you can use your mind to intentionally create the placebo effect. I concretely remember two recovery stories (vaguely). In one there was a person with multiple sclerosis that fully reversed the illness and recovered. Another person had a illness where the bones become very soft and fragile and she had to sit in a wheelchair (if I remember this correctly), also recovered. 2.) Becoming supernatural - Dr. Joe Dispenza Is the continuation of "you are the placebo". And here things get crazier. This one goes much deeper into consciousness, mysticism, transcendental experiences etc. The stories in this book blow your mind. In the first chapter a woman gets PTSD after her husband committed suicide. Then she gets so severely ill with like a dozen of diseases (and I think the immune system did attack her body in some ways), and she recovers from all of it. But you can also read about people having mystical experiences with some spirits showing up who pull a tumor out of someone's brain, like really crazy stuff, open-mindedness required. 3.) Mind to matter - Dawson Church Is friends with the prior author. A lot of stories included, not all about health, some are about synchronicities etc. This one includes the story about a man reversing his AIDS back to HIV after a transcendental experience. Other books are "the genie in your genes" (D. Church) and the biology of belief (Dr. Bruce Lipton more science heavy, haven't finished it yet). So these three guys - Dr. Joe Dispenza, Dawson Church, Bruce Lipton all know each other and have tons of videos on YouTube. On the website from Dr. Joe Dispenza you can find countless testimonials from people who recovered from anything you could think of - terminal brain cancer, MS, Morbus Chron and illnesses I can't even spell. One thing to note though: These guys talk almost only about the mind, trauma, emotions, spirituality, consciousness and how it's all related to health, and neclect the side of nutrition and supplements a little bit (or they just don't focus on it), which of course is also very important. Oh and a really good introduction is the movie "Heal" by Kelly Noonan. Here all these guys from above talk, but also many more and you can attain a good big picture understanding of what is required to heal in general. And if you want to research for one specific illness you will eventually find something if you combine terms like e.g. "multiple sclerosis" "recovery story" or "recovered from [xyz]", like just out of curiosity I once googled whether there's anyone who recovered from MS who has a recovery story somewhere and I did find a few. Pillars of recovery: Doing everything that is known to be healthy ALL at once - good nutrition + specific supplements - enough sleep and improving sleep quality - accepting current energy limits, not doing more than the body can at the moment - avoiding toxins and detoxification - support for immune system (by doing all the other things) - emotional support from others - overcoming emotional trauma (huge...) - meditation and/or breathing techniques - relaxation (the last three are required to establish balance in the autonomic nervous system, between the parasympathetic and the sympathetic nervous system, which is the prerequisite for pretty much any recovery from any (severe) chronic illness). - spirituality can be a part of overcoming trauma and improving emotional well-being. As you can see, everything is linked and a holistic approach is usually required.
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Is February the hardest month of the year? Or late December through early March? It would also depend on where you live in the world but if you live in the northern hemisphere, where it is dark for many hours of the day and it is very, very cold where it feels harsh to go outside, is that the hardest time to live? Is the summer sun and heat easier? Do we feel more anxiety, depression, sadness, have more suicide during the winter months? Huh, well this first pop-up contradicts that hypothesis: "Their findings demonstrate that both male and female suicide rates tend to be higher during the spring and summer months (combined gender inference of: April ~ 27.24; May ~ 30.04; June ~ 28.86; July ~ 27.83) compared to winter (Nov. ~ 25.77; Dec." I feel bad for my interpretations of events and how it has hurt others. I was hurting myself too. I just don't like hurting others. Part of me says, I would rather be hurt than for others to be hurt. But - I don't like being hurt either - it is really hard. I can't make someone be or react a certain way. I just feel like I have hurt people around me and I don't like it. I keep on trying to reinterpret events to try to make it seem in a lighter, more loving way but sometimes that is not good enough and I have hurt the person because I was feeling hurt and when I try to reinterpret it to not feel hurt, they are still hurt. I can see the issue where I am actively trying to reinterpret the issue so as to not feel hurt and try to make amends but the other person does not do the same - and all I can do is wait for them to reinterpret it too.
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First I'm sorry for casting unncessary negativity on this forum but I really hope someone here could tell me what I should do. I sincerely hope someone would care. In my previous post (true story) noone cares (I thought so before having it posted though) and I did wrong. I have driven my pitiable cousin to suicidal thoughts. In my previous post, I shared the story of my cousin who has fully recovered from serious mental illness ( And it was confirmed by everyone I know, even doctor). After that, he realized he's got a talent for being a good actor and that's what he's always loved to do without knowing due to that God-dammed mental insanity - his mother has realized his talent since his childhood too but cannot help because he AREALDY self-harmed himself (leaving untreatable scars on his left hand) he got zero chance to do what he loves. Mixed luck I would say, I have an acquaintance whose job is a experienced female actress. Seeing how unhappy my cousin was, I told him to muster all courage to meet the actress because I already helped set up a meet and told her about his scars. She's quite impressed with my cousin's gift after having him tested. Reluctantly though, she took him to the director so he could give it a short (acting under carmera with other actors). and after the Day 1 the director was pretty impressed asking why the female actress did not introduce my cousin earlier. However, yesterday when the character my cousin acts has to wear a T-shirt and the director (and the producer (boss/investor too) saw the scars on my cousin's hand the director immediately refused to let my cousin continue. The producer ordered the guard to throw us out right after. My friend (the female actress) tells me she got scolded severely. She's not angry with me though because she recognizes my cousin's acting talent. However, my cousin got existentially depressed for it. I'm not exaggerating the problem. He's not crying though but gets into total silence. I could see the helpless depression in his eys. He's not talking with anyone, just a short answer to every question. I said sorry to him and he gave the answer: "It was not your fault, prior to this event I already thought if I cannot do what I truly love to do, why not leave this world for good. because I really cannot find fun in activities like foods sex drinks, the things others find fun in". I truly regretted for what I have done. However, is it really that BAD? Is Not being able to work at the job you love according to your talent really that depressing? Honestly I have never felt it that way before until now. Maybe it was because I was always poor and had to work at whatever jobs to make and money. Every time I got a little more than needed I spent it on party with friends, travel and sex. I truly love my cousin. I never thought I'd drive my cousin to this dangerous situation. If he commits suicide, my entire life would never be peaceful Please, Can someone on this forum tell me what to do. Should I leave him on his own or intervene and in what way should I intervene?
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Forza21 replied to Mips's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
This is 100% true. Please, seriously consider changes in this forum narration. I've been in hell because of solipsism. It's not that I blame anyone here, in fact, it's otherwise. I'm so grateful for all beautiful souls here, who helped me, when i was at the edge of suicide. Now i can see clearly how my ego-mind corrupted this idea, and it turned out great, but i sympathize with all the people who might go through this. And they are many, when you look on the main forum board... -
Maybe we SHOULDN'T wake up to GOD? We are here for a reason. The reason is, to have human experience, right? If i'm GOD, it doesn't matter if i know that or not. It doesn't change the fact who i am. I have 100% chance that i'll die, and i'll find out the truth eventually. God puts so much effort to hide itself. God puts so much effort to forget. When i read other people stories about their awaking, it's really,really maddening. It's so fucking scary. Some describe is as the biggest horror of their lives, as being shocked to the core, as pure death. During my experience, I was seriously contemplating suicide, and i'm really mentally stable person. It was just too much. All this makes me think. Are we really supposed to find out the truth? Maybe it's against GOD's will? Maybe we are supposed to just live our human experience, and that's why we are here? Maybe the truth isn't for the finite human mind to handle?
