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@Moksha what is the correlation between being free of thoughts(letting go) or just being and allowing thoughts to be there .. is aligning thoughts with feelings still an act of the ego?. Most of the time when I just feel the bliss of being present , creative or positive thoughts pop up after a while. Should I let them go too or play them out. I have the sense that , especially in the traditional spirituality, thought in general is seen as bad.

@woohoo123 You should follow your bliss right. So you should be somewhat motivated to do it even if you don't make it to the top. Maybe music making isn't for you. Everybody's life purpose is making music I don't get it. Have you thought about building a band? Everybody in the band will constantly share feedback so you will get motivated to get better there.

I finally did it, I finally had my first DMT experience! I've been waiting for this moment for two years, and finally found it. The experience was the exact opposite of what I expected. This trip was ALL about rooting, grounding, reconnecting with motivation for life, rekindling that passion for matter, for flesh and bones. I was expecting a very lofty and nondual trip, but DMT didn't give me what I wanted, it gave me what I NEEDED THE MOST. Grounding into my best possible life. I have tried several psychedelics, received huge benefits from them, also gone to therapy for two years and changed my psyche into a healthier and more balanced version, recovering almost entirely from depression and anxiety, but.... DMT has accomplished what no amount of therapy or LSD (or other psychs) could never accomplish: It gave me back my SPIRITUAL CONNECTION TO LIFE AND MATTER, a love for life I've never had in the past. Maybe the most incredible part is that the trip itself was not the peak of the experience. The peak was my walk through the riverside where I received so many insights into life and felt such a powerful love for the human experience. Setting: in my car for the actual trip, walking along the riverside for the afterglow Dose: 10-12 mg (my scale is not that accurate) It was definitely a light trip, no visuals, no time distortion, no mystical states, just everyday life and LOTS of powerful emotions Duration: 15 mins trip, 2 hours of very intense afterglow rich of insights I don't even know where to start. Words fail me. It was too much, even though the experience was completely ordinary, it was SO SHOCKINGLY PROFOUND at the same time. Perceptions were the same old ones, but the emotions that this trip evoked in me were out of this world. Love for life, love for my humanity, love for matter, love for this limited flawed experience, love and gratitude for having so much to live here and now. THE TRIP ITSELF The trip was just me, in my car, with ordinary reality and ordinary perceptions, realizing just how scared of life and of living fully I am. That's it. I cried a lot, I sighed a lot, It felt so good, I was letting it all out. It's ok, I am scared of life, I've been hurt, I have felt lost for so long (it's important to say that my life is getting better and better in the recent years, but this trip just revealed to me how deeply scared and damaged I've been my whole life and how I'm still scared and weak even after all the progress). I want to be free to connect with people, I want to be free to love others, I want to be free to be real, authentic, to be open-hearted. Lots of tears, mixed with the joy of feeling pure, feeling DEEPLY alive, once again. I thought I had regained my liveliness in the recent years, which is true, but this was a NEW LEVEL of life-passion, a new sparkle of fire, a purer kind of light. THE AFTERGLOW (2 hours) I went for a long walk along the river, where I saw people talking, people with their dogs, birds, the clear mirroring water, and cried a lot, sometimes of compassion for myself, sometimes of love and gratitude for being inside this human experience, gratitude for recognizing the gift of life itself. It was spirituality getting back to the Earth, to the roots. Here are the insights I got, most of them are covered in tears and sighs: 1. I was getting lost in the heavens. Too much spiritual seeking of the nondual states, especially sober. This made me detached from the earth and from the gift of life. THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT INSIGHT, and mother to all others. I expected a trip into the sky, but I was instead sent deep into the earth, to regain connection with material life and its spiritual dimension. 2. Material life is spiritual. I was creating a sneaky duality where only meditative and self-inquiring states were becoming "the serious way to live". I was sooooo wrong!!! Earth is spirit. Blood is spirit. Pain is spirit. Flesh and bones are spirit. I was escaping into nonduality, creating some sort of dissociation from life. 3. The small things are the great things. Seeing those people with their dogs made me cry. I never realized how much light and wonder there is in these ordinary everyday situations. I deeply felt the magic of these people going out with the dog they loved and cared for. Life is full of experience, and experience is a gift. 4. Stop littering. I have always been a pro-ecology person, but recently I have started littering unconsciously because of some kind of frustration. I realized how much love and care I can show to life and to the absolute by just CARING about my Earth. By keeping these tissues and papers for myself to throw in a bin after is a sign of spiritual love for this place. This place has been given to me by God. I am not going to litter anymore. 5. Stop being so cautious around people. Life is meant to be messy and to be both a challenging and pleasant experience. You will be safe, but you need to be more vulnerable and open to people. You can choose to be less introverted and connect with new people. In fact I realized how much I want new connections and new friends, and how my fear is getting in the way of my desires. 6. Life is all about desire and passion. Life is also about awakening, but you CAN NOT use awakening as a dissociating tool to reduce pain from life. Pain is spirit. Suffering is spirit. You cannot avoid the messiness of life and awaken. So the insight repeats: get back to the roots, get back into the dirt and you will find spirit there. 7. You have moved towards the sky a bit too much recently. Move towards the earth. New levels of the awakening path will await you there, downwards, not upwards. You cannot grow your branches up in the sky if you are not growing your roots, or you will dissociate from life or even become psychotic. Be wise. 8. Fear is spirit. But don't let fear become an excuse. Fear is spirit, meaning that fear is a phenomenon of spirit, it appears in the spirit, but it is not a real ostacle to living life fully. Learn from it, don't get mesmerized by it. 9. Do not fear to love people deeply. Yes, you will get hurt again. It will benefit you, you are more awake now (not awakened, but just more awake than in the past), and you can grow and benefit from heartbreak. It will not damage you anymore. Living fully is feeling passions fully. This is how God meant it to be. 10. God is below. Not really above. It's a delusion of religion. God is in the small things. 11. DMT could not give you a lofty trip because that's not what grows you spiritually. What grows you spiritually is FINDING THE MAGIC IN LIFE, finding that LOVE IN CRUDE MATTER. The dirty raw soil you hold in your hands IS GOD!!!! It's not some lofty fantastical idea of being in pure bliss and light. Realize how much love and wonder there is in this raw chaotic and imperfect soil. It vibrates with passion for itself. DMT had to show you this, because spirituality is all about loving what is, not loving what you expect to be. I want to share this raw imperfect and impulsive poem, because that's something REAL I've felt, It's messy and intense, as life it's meant to be. As God wants it to be. Earth or heaven It doesn't matter Where you look for it God is found In Earth full of bones Leave the sky Drop your hopes Just feel it here It runs in you The pulse of blood The scorching sun The freezing air A cry of despair A tear of hope All of this just is The breath of God Do not seek elsewhere Just dive through The shades of life ❤️❤️❤️ Thanks DMT. I will come back.

What is this boundless thing we call infinity? A number that exceeds all count and measure. A space that stretches far beyond our eye. A time that knows no end nor pause nor leisure? Or is it but a fancy of the mind, A word to fill the gaps of human thought? A dream that we can never hope to find, A prize that we can never truly sought. Nay, rather let us think of it as this: A challenge to our reason and our will, A source of wonder and of endless bliss, A power that can inspire us still. For though we may not grasp it with our sense, We may yet feel it with our soul's essence. Beyond the stars and planets Beyond the sun and moon Beyond the edge of space and time There lies infinity A concept so sublime A mystery so profound A paradox so puzzling That no one can define Infinity is beauty Infinity is grace Infinity is wonder and terror in one place Infinity is endless Infinity is vast Infinity is everything and nothing at the last.

There was I, standing outside waiting for a green light to cross the street. I was nothing even though my appearance was something, I could feel my warm hand as hot tea that I had in my hand. At that time I really really realized what I actually Am. I'm magic nothing that can creates somehow whatever it desires. I'm the shape shifter. I never knew that the truth is such an amazing and joyful thing. It's a pure bliss to be God and it's going to be forever, no matter what. So here I am now in a form of a human imagining other humans Haha

I can tell you have never experienced bliss/selfless/omniscient states of consciousness, all the things you're seeking to fill your desires are already within you. You're still too busy with physicality and illusionary concepts that keep you seeking, you will never achieve true happiness or true self like that

How do you know happines and bliss without suffering? How do you know God without knowing the devil? How do you know Truth without knowing falsehood? God, there is no god but He. He has let me wander in darkness with the devil, with a devil who claimed to be God, in falsehood, only to come and expose it. In this way, I learned what falsehood is, and I learned what Truth is, I learned who the devil was and Who God is. He has let me suffer for a lifetime, only to come and make me happy. In this way, I learned what true happines really is. He has let people corrupt my mind with falsehood, only to come and expose and destroy the falsehood, and show me the Truth. In this way, I learned what falsehood is, and what Truth is. From Him we were created, and to Him we shall return.

@Ayham Im not an expert just an opinionated guy trying to figure this stuff out. The goal of kriya is to make you feel blissful and calm your mind. Think of it like the techniques are how to throw a basketball, and the bliss and calmness are like hitting the hoop. You only know if you are doing the techniques well if it makes you hit the goal. Kriya teachers are very unpedagogical in my opinion. Most kriya yogies are practising how to throw the basketball without any consideration for if it hits the hoop. How strong you are able to generate these feelings is like building a muscle. It might be medium strength at first, but as you open doors in your psyche and build the "muscle" you can eventually get to a place there it's like an orgasm. But if you feel close to nothing at first you are not doing it right. With regard to visualization: You should read Ennio Nimis' book on kriya to understand the subtleties of pulling energy. The goal is to generate a feeling of energy going up and down your body. With practice, you can feel the proper channel in your spine but this is not necessary for beginners. Visualization is just a means to generate feeling. You don't even need to visualize as long as you hit the hoop, which is to generate energy feeling. You don't have to upgrade your routine. It's not like you are gonna get all your results in the last 5 min of a 1h routine. All talk of you have to do this or that is dogma. If it works, it works. Mahamudra feels incredible to me. It's very grounding as I hit the rook chakra very hard as the energy descends down the spine. Santata Gamana got his pranayama from modifying the technique of a guy called Sri Rangin Mukherjee. His technique is to create bliss in the chakras by chanting om in them but instead of doing it in the body he does it in the middle of the head(agna chakra). Create a sense of radiation love in your chest. Notice how the same energetic feeling is also felt in your head. Now focus on the feeling in your head instead of your chest. With practice, you won't have to feel the chakra in the body at all, you just have to bring up a mental memory of it. When I do this it's so intense that I start shaking and twisting my body. I'm not good at handling pleasure. Sri Mukherjee does 6 oms per in- and out-breath going up and down the first 6 chakras(again, all in the head, there is no actual vertical movement). The technique requires you to be familiar with the chakras beforehand. Personally, I do one breath per chakra because I can't breathe slowly enough without rushing the technique. Sri Mukherjee's writings on his techniques are really bad, I don't recommend his books. It was hard for me to parse out his techniques. I would recommend practicing energy work fundamentals before getting into kriya. Tara Springett's teachings are good, especially her book 'Enlightenment through the path of Kundalini'. Try the technique I posted above in my other post.

Questioner: You say reality is one. Oneness, unity, is the attribute of the person. Is then reality a person, with the universe as its body? Nisargadatta Maharaj: Whatever you may say will be both true and false. Words do not reach beyond the mind. Q: I am just trying to understand. You are telling us of the Person, the Self and the Supreme (vyakti, vyakta, avyakta). The light of Pure Awareness (prajna), focussed as ‘I am’ in the Self (jivatma), as consciousness (chetana) illumines the mind (antahkarana) and as life (prana) vitalises the body (deha). All this is fine as far as the words go. But when it comes to distinguishing in myself the person from the Self and the Self from the Supreme, I get mixed up. M: The person is never the subject. You can see a person, but you are not the person. You are always the Supreme which appears at a given point of time and space as the witness, a bridge between the pure awareness of the Supreme and the manifold consciousness of the person. Q: When I look at myself, I find I am several persons fighting amongst themselves for the use of the body. M: They correspond to the various tendencies (samskara) of the mind. Q: Can I make peace between them? M: How can you? They are so contradictory! See them as they are: mere habits of thoughts and feelings, bundles of memories and urges. Q: Yet they all say, “I am”. M: It is only because you identify yourself with them. Once you realise that whatever appears before you cannot be yourself and cannot say, “I am”, you are free of all your ‘persons’ and their demands. The sense ‘I am’ is your own. You cannot part with it, but you can impart it to anything, as in saying, “I am young”, “I am rich” and so on. But such self-identifications are patently false and the cause of bondage. Q: I can now understand that I am not the person, but that which, when reflected in the person, gives it a sense of being. Now, what about the Supreme? In what way do I know myself as the Supreme? M: The source of consciousness cannot be an object in consciousness. To know the source is to be the source. When you realise that you are not the person, but the pure and calm witness, and that fearless awareness is your very being, you are the being. It is the source, the Inexhaustible Possibility. Q: Are there many sources or one for all? M: It depends how you look at it: in other words, from which end. The objects in the world are many, but the eye that sees them is one. The higher always appears as one to the lower and the lower as many to the higher. Q: Shapes and names are all of one and the same God? M: Again, it all depends on how you look at it. On the verbal level everything is relative. Absolutes should be experienced, not discussed. Q: How is the Absolute experienced? M: It is not an object to be recognised and stored up in memory. Rather, it is in the present and in feeling. It has more to do with the ‘how’ than with the ‘what’. It is in the quality, in the value; being the source of everything, it is in everything. Q: If it is the source, why and how does it manifest itself? M: It gives birth to consciousness. All else is in consciousness. Q: Why are there so many centres of consciousness? M: The objective universe (mahadakash) is in constant movement, projecting and dissolving innumerable forms. Whenever a form is infused with life (prana), consciousness (chetana) appears by reflection of awareness in matter. Q: How is the Supreme affected? M: What can affect it and how? The source is not affected by the vagaries of the river nor is the metal by the shape of the jewelry. Is the light affected by the picture on the screen? The Supreme makes everything possible; that is all. Q: How is it that some things do happen and some do not? M: Seeking out causes is a pastime of the mind. There is no duality of cause and effect. Everything is its own cause. Q: No purposeful action is then possible? M: All I say is that consciousness contains all. In consciousness all is possible. You can have causes if you want them, in your world. Another may be content with a single cause: God’s will. The root cause is one: the sense ‘I am’. Q: What is the link between the Self (vyakta) and the Supreme (Avyakta)? M: From the self’s point of view the world is the known, the Supreme — the Unknown. The Unknown gives birth to the known, yet remains Unknown. The known is infinite, but the Unknown is an infinitude of infinities. Just like a ray of light is never seen unless intercepted by the specs of dust, so does the Supreme make everything known while remaining unknown itself. Q: Does it mean that the Unknown is inaccessible? M: Oh, no. The Supreme is the easiest to reach for it is your very being. It is enough to stop thinking and desiring anything but the Supreme. Q: And if I desire nothing, not even the Supreme? M: Then you are as good as dead, or you are the Supreme. Q: The world is full of desires. Everybody wants something or other. Who is the desirer? The person or the self? M: The self. All desires, holy and unholy, come from the self; they all hang on the sense ‘I am’. Q: I can understand holy desires (satyakama) emanating from the self. It may be the expression of the bliss aspect of the Sadchitananda (Beingness–Awareness–Happiness) of the Self. But why unholy desires? M: All desires aim at happiness. Their shape and quality depend on the psyche (antahkarana). Where inertia (tamas) predominates, we find perversions. With energy (rajas), passions arise. With lucidity (sattva) the motive behind the desire is goodwill, compassion, the urge to make happy rather than be happy. But the Supreme is beyond all; yet because of its infinite permebility all cogent desires can be fulfilled. Q: Which desires are cogent? M: Desires that destroy their subjects or objects or do not subside on satisfaction are self-contradictory and cannot be fulfilled. Only desires motivated by love, goodwill and compassion are beneficial to both the subject and object and can be fully satisfied. Q: All desires are painful, the holy as well as the unholy. M: They are not the same and pain is not the same. Passion is painful, compassion — never. The entire universe strives to fulfil a desire born of compassion. Q: Does the Supreme know itself? Is the Impersonal conscious? M: The source of all has all. Whatever flows from it must be there already in seed form. And as a seed is the last of innumerable seeds and contains the experience and the promise of numberless forests, so does the Unknown contain all that was or could have been and all that shall or would be. The entire field of becoming is open and accessible; past and future coëxist in the eternal now. Q: Are you living in the Supreme Unknown? M: Where else? Q: What makes you say so? M: No desire ever arises in my mind. Q: Are you then unconscious? M: Of course not! I am fully conscious, but since no desire or fear enters my mind, there is perfect silence. Q: Who knows the silence? M: Silence knows itself. It is the silence of the silent mind when passions and desires are silenced. Q: Do you experience desires occasionally? M: Desires are just waves in the mind. You know a wave when you see one. A desire is just a thing among many. I feel no urge to satisfy it; no action needs be taken on it. Freedom from desire means this: the compulsion to satisfy is absent. Q: Why do desires arise at all? M: Because you imagine that you were born and that you will die if you do not take care of your body. Desire for embodied existence is the root cause of trouble. Q: Yet so many jivas get into bodies. Surely it cannot be some error of judgement. There must be a purpose. What could it be? M: To know itself the self must be faced with its opposite — the non-self. Desire leads to experience. Experience leads to discrimination, detachment, self-knowledge — and liberation. And what is liberation after all? To know that you are beyond birth and death. By forgetting who you are and imagining yourself a mortal creature, you created so much trouble for yourself that you have to wake up, as from a bad dream. Inquiry also wakes you up. You need not wait for suffering — enquiry into happiness is better, for the mind is in harmony and peace. Q: Who exactly is the ultimate experiencer — the Self or the Unknown? M: The Self, of course. Q: Then why introduce the notion of the Supreme Unknown? M: To explain the Self. Q: But is there anything beyond the Self? M: Outside the Self there is nothing. All is one and all is contained in ‘I am’. In the waking and dream states it is the person. In deep sleep and turiya it is the Self. Beyond the alert intentness of turiya lies the great, silent peace of the Supreme. But in fact, all is one in essence and related in appearance. In ignorance the seer becomes the seen and in wisdom he is the seeing. But why be concerned with the Supreme? Know the knowers and all will be known. - i am that, chapter 20

You need to realize how insanely awesome the truth is. Yes, you are God and God is absolutely alone and that is perfect. Imagine if there was something restricting God, wtf? So realize that God = Love, then you will see that eternity with yourself is pure bliss. Basically, your realization is to shallow you need to go deeper and face your fears to see that they are just illusions or misinterpretations of the ego and not the actual truth.

I'm open to the possibility that this is the most important thing a human can do, yet I'm also open to the possibility that you only believe this is the most important thing a human can do. So far, I'm not inspired put faith in the concept and run with it. I'm looking for good evidence, or an argument with air-tight logic. I'm all ears. I listened to the first one all the way through some time ago. I can't help but like Leo, he has a very interesting mind and I respect his dedication to life fulfillment and existential questioning. However, nothing in that video leads me to believe certain metaphysical truths based off philosophy and mental impressions. It feels as though we're trying to make scientific conclusions without doing the science. That doesn't mean god-realization concepts are wrong, but I'd need more to go off of before choosing to do a cannonball into those waters. I haven't listened to those two other videos you posted, perhaps I should and see what he has to say. From what I've gathered, I lean a bit more towards the traditional scientific blend of balancing open-mindedness with skepticism. I do not embrace radical open-mindedness, or radical anything. "Radical" is by definition an imbalance, and balance is a core concept of my philosophy. The reason I've made this post is because truth is the primary foundational element for all life fulfillment. If god-realization is the ultimate truth, it is obviously worth pursuing. It would be the thing to pursue. I like how you've reflected upon the thoughts we have, and our judgements. The idea of dropping labels, for example, is a wonderful way to peel back the mind's veil on reality. As a teen I had an epiphany, maybe some would call it a spiritual awakening. Afterwards, I gained an ability to drop labels entirely. To see a tree and no longer think "tree" was to be hit by a tidal wave of stimuli; to see, even in the dullest objects, oceans of detail which were always there yet never recognized in my default state. Sheer bliss. This ability even extended to words; to view a page from a book without my mind grabbing hold of a single word, to see the letters for the strange arrangement of lines that they really are. Eventually, with practice, I could hear someone speaking and not grab onto the words they were saying, but instead take in the sounds themselves, as if hearing a person speak in a foreign tongue. My high-school teachers didn't like when I did this exercise... Applying this to the label of my "self" has a similar effect, but perhaps a bit more earth-shattering. The mental constructs fall away, the constant narrative in my head suddenly disintegrates. You suddenly feel like a dog off the leash, able to experience your own existence without the ball-and-chain of constant thinking. I didn't know there was a difference, thank you. I do have the ability to be free of thought, it can be a very useful tool. It does make me feel more clear, as if I'm no longer seeing life through an algae-covered fishbowl. It's clean, true. The way I personally drop thoughts it is through awareness fueled by a reverence for existence. One-hundred percent observation. When the soul's eyes are wide open, there's no space for thought. I am not sure we're talking about the same thing... maybe we are, but we use different terminology. You had good information and advice in this post, thank you. I think you're correct; the "god-realization" hard evidence probably isn't there, because it isn't a "hard" subject. There's nothing hard about mental impressions and experiences. The skeptic in me has noticed that I haven't seen anyone go super deep down this rabbit hole and return with a nugget of wisdom from the cosmos which makes me say, "Whoa, what in the hell did this guy just experience? How did he know that?". Post-psychedelic ramblings sound, generally speaking, like something that one on drugs would say. Nothing amazingly profound. I know language is limited, but it isn't that limited. However, the incredible consistency of god-realization experiences (from people all across the world for thousands of years) makes me very intrigued, I can't help but feel that there could be something there. But there are two issues: The impressions could be explained biologically. A sense of losing one's self and becoming one with the fabric of the cosmos be he result of the OAA part of your brain losing energy. The Orientation Association Area is the part of the brain that lets you know where you end and the outside world begins, which requires a lot of energy to maintain. Extreme focus via meditation (or, workaround with psychedelics) can shut down the OAA and you become "one" with your surroundings. Sounds true from a scientific standpoint, we are a collection of particles in a nearly infinite sea of particles. Does a temporary disablement of the OAA help us feel that fact, rather than just know? Does it allow us to experience the "truth" of physical reality? Maybe. P.S. I learned most of what I said about the OAA from this video here, and I haven't fact-checked his sources, so please take my information on the OAA with a grain of salt. I'm still not so sure that people who experience this profound realization are necessarily living better lives. They seem to for a while. They get hit with an initial "whoa" period, like coming off a 5D ride times a million, but then it resides somewhere in the background. Gradually, they return to their default state, sometimes fueled by a bitterness for others who haven't had the same experience or who don't care to hear about it. I'm speaking of a person I worked with in particular, but I've seen it in others. I think there may be more direct and long-lasting means of attaining a spiritual and fulfilled state of being. Good way of putting it. Descartes said "I think, therefore I am." Perhaps it'd be more accurate to say "I am, therefore I am."

@OBEler I will eventually drop 10mg of 5 meo mipt this weekend. I want it to be less strong but more manageable, try to handle the energy in "meditation" to enter into ecstasy. I had a feeling of ecstasy/bliss under lsd, I want to recreate it by going further. do you have any advice?

Yesterday, someone asked me what Nirvana is. Here's what I told him: First, realize on an existential level that You never cease to be. Once you awaken you understand that nirvana is always the case. That is the nature of reality. Bliss, absolute. The incarnation in which you realize this fully is called The Ascending Lifetime. In such a lifetime, you gain lordship over all systems of existence and express free will with accordance to The Divine Law. Once there, you decide how long you'd like to live with the physical body which is in your possession at that moment. Over 120 years is a possibility. Great wisdom is within your grasp and higher states and levels of consciousness become open to you. You may enter an initiation of a certain lineage, guide others to nirvana, study with ascended masters or walk the earth and simply bask in bliss. You may do this as long as you wish. When an intent is set to continue on The Path, the universe contrives to bring you the people, circumstances and experiences you desire most in order for you to express The Self further.

I was born a Muslim, and for 18 years of my life I was a very devout one. The last 4 years of my life I've done much introspection on my beliefs and I type to you now as an agnostic. I am not publicly agnostic but my close friends are aware of it, and when on rare occasions we talk religion one of my friends always says something that makes me question the idea of theism altogether, he says "My parents are ignorant and they're so happy, why can't I be happy and ignorant as well?". When he says that, it makes me think of all the sleepless nights trying to accept the fact that "Allah", this being that I had built an intimate 18 year long relationship with, did not exist. And it makes me question whether the entire journey of truth (specifically in religion) is worth it at all. Should each person just follow what their culture teaches, regardless of its external validity, because that is what allows for the least suffering and the most happiness? Does ignorance = happiness? Thoughts?

For me 5-MeO is pure bliss and ecstasy.

Im not sure im getting it exactly, why does 5-meo-dmt cause instant depression in my case? While LSD and Shrooms are uplifting and pure bliss?

I would've thought that specifying it's been done before would invite you to assume that I mean in a way that hasn't been done before. These videos inadvertently affirm you can attain bliss from awakening, but I quite obviously meant a video specifically devoted to convincing even the laziest of spiritual seekers to stop everything and pursue God awakening, using the most detailed and compelling analogies that convey the unspeakable bliss that is supposedly possible.

it is called flow, no mind, god mode learn to turn off mind this turns up awe, bliss, creativity i suggest meditation

I am not the I, I am all, I am nothing. I am truly at peace, I see all clearly. But.. Now what? I enjoy my life, but it's been a few years without a spiritual goal, just enjoying the bliss, I'm wondering where I can now take my spiritual practice if I'm to pursue something new.

Greetings, Ever since I have found and implemented some spiritual practices in my life, I have developed a pattern. One suffering comes my way, I will close up and reflect on it. It will take time energy to chew it, but I will always come blissfull on top of it, at the end of the day. I feel like my life is on fast forward. I am in a sea of desires and fears, so persistent, so large, yet so temporary and nonexistent. I underestand how to play with desire and fear a bit, mainly to relieve myself from them when needed. Yet, everything feels so intense, agitations become so amplified as well as pleasures. On top of that, whatever I experience, there is a layer of bliss behind it, but the feelings feel very real aswell, but not as real as they used to feel. It feels like I am on to something. But I have to keep going further. I also feel that mt values drift away further and further from the people I see everyday. But I trust myself more and more. I underestand more and more experientially that suffering is not your nature. I am very tempted to go deeper, to go to some point of no return. I want to do a vipassana retreat or a practice like that. I want to really get along with physical, emotional pain and existential dread. I want to experience the common beliefs society has (which pushes and pulls you to do certain things) for what they are. Outside nothing much has to change, but internally it would be a catasrophic difference. I want to establish a system or pattern of actions or way of being that just works. Your praise or blame does not affect it. Just living for it's sake is enough. It's acctually incomperhandable that reality exists. I don't want to be the bundle of toughts and emotions and think I am something great, I do not resonate with these ideas. Maybe it sounds egostic, but my whole life is egoistic. Living to justify my existence. That i am or am not something and that I do something ot the latter. Or to do what you do or to strive what you are striving for. I am married to my practice. It's all I want to do, there is nothing better to do after your survival needs have been met. My biggest wish for my life is to give me the highest freedom it can give. And here I am. It goes very deep guys. Your life will change with this. Hopefully for the better. There are things you will find on the way which I can't really talk about, and I am not even there yet. But I can be more intuitive, blissfull. Developed more trust in yourself and the world. Your life is less personal. Your past suffering doesn't mean basically anything to you. You have a reliable mechanism to relax and fight your depressions. Simple things feel more genuine. You feel a bit more romantic about death, and there is generally less fear about it. And you will for sure KNOW that you are something different (distinctly) than the body, mind or personality that you think you are. You will become more sielent, more self-sufficient. Less materialistic and more loving (most people.) Anger and boredom will reduce drastically, but you will feel it many times. It is also dangerous as you are flirting with solipsism. Your meanings and life-purpose will suffer, your relationships and sense of sekf worth will suffer. But these things anyway are a sinking ship. Better to come out earlier than later. Also you can go trough terrible experiences in being in cults etc. be careful of those. I almost went to India at one point. If you go alone and do it somewhat right, you will go very far. You can basically forget about what your peers are struggling (at least internally). The more you will grow the more you can grow and more possibilities are open to you. This means complete self-transformation in some sense. I see this is possible in a lifetime. I wish you to live abd become smarter and happier, leading to an ecstatic death experience as your last one. Best of luck.

I invented an exercise today which I call the Top 100 Self-Deceptions Exercise. I will share you my list, after I explain the exercise. The Exercise: Write down your top 100 self-deceptions from scratch. Think of all the ways in which you fool yourself. Force your brain to come up with at least 100. Here is my list: Top 100 Self-Deceptions 1. Comparison 2. thinking I know more than I actually do 3. thinking things apply to others but not to me (i.e., aging, sickness, rules, death, etc.) 4. All beliefs, assumptions, and biases 5. Selfishness 6. Closedmindedness 7. emotions – anger, depression, fear, envy, etc. 8. my own mind 9. entertainment, leisure, and fun 10. giving authority to others 11. arguing and trying to persuade, convert, and convince others 12. addictions 13. distractions 14. believing I have discovered or answered something 15. peer pressure, conformity, demonization, and groupthink 16. pleasure and pain – what typically feels good is typically unhealthy (i.e., junk food tasting good and videogames being fun). 17. Laziness, resistance, and procrastination 18. Subscribing to or defending any worldview 19. Outsourcing self-inquiry, contemplation, and critical thinking 20. Following a teacher/guru or teaching 21. Needing others, love, approval, and socialization 22. Making up excuses or justifications for anything 23. Blaming or judging others or self 24. Keeping myself busy 25. Neglecting myself and my own personal growth 26. Engaging in petty activities (i.e., gossip, critiquing, debunking, videogames, etc.) 27. Watching television or playing any kind of game 28. Reading too many books as a way to neglect and distract myself from contemplation and introspection 29. Only caring and prioritizing when it is too late (i.e., caring about health only when you get the diagnosis). 30. Pursuing pleasure, success, and comfort 31. Avoiding the emotional work 32. Believing in moderation 33. Self-doubt and imposter syndrome 34. Over-confidence & delusions of grandeur 35. Ownership 36. Expertise or credibility 37. Politics 38. Science 39. Academia and education systems 40. Media/news 41. Religion 42. Plagiarism 43. Conspiracy theories 44. Crime 45. Judicial system 46. Royalty/status 47. Social media 48. Hatred, racism, sexism, bigotry, etc. 49. Healthcare industries 50. Insurance 51. War and military 52. The belief that I am invincible in my youth 53. Internet 54. Entitlement 55. Parroting others and failing to be original 56. Spiritual bypassing 57. Spiritual superiority 58. Lying, manipulating, and controlling others 59. Thinking I have a later or tomorrow 60. Time 61. Ruminating the past 62. Getting lost in thought 63. Denial of death – not being aware of mortality 64. Denial of anything 65. Being too afraid to question something 66. Dishonesty of any kind 67. Confusing familiarity with knowledge 68. “doing it for others.” 69. Gossiping 70. Being too selfless and using that as an excuse to not be responsible 71. Preaching 72. Attachment to opinions, ideas, people, teachings, teachers, and things 73. Materialism 74. Believing in duality, separation, or ego 75. Assuming that other people are conscious 76. Family, friends, enemies, and other people 77. Using truth as a weapon to justify being selfish 78. “ignorance is bliss.” 79. Dreams 80. Backsliding 81. Overestimation and underestimation 82. Dismissing any idea 83. Being too skeptical or too logical 84. Being too gullible or too emotional 85. Thinking that something is superior or inferior 86. Thinking objectivism is true 87. Thinking 88. Taking the easy path – the path of least resistance 89. Assuming that thinking is dangerous 90. Assuming there is only one right way 91. Admiration to the extreme 92. Narcissism and mental illness 93. The idea to live off the grid 94. Hating anything 95. Not actively seeking challenges and trying new things 96. “not having enough time.” 97. Making the same mistake 98. Assuming that philosophy is a waste of time 99. Generalization 100. Caring too much about thing that aren’t real of don’t matter such as money 101. Sex/attraction 102. Loneliness 103. Being a loner 104. Sharing an awakening with others Feel free to share your own lists. There is so much more. I haven't even scratched the surface!

@Leo Gura Yeah i get it. But isn't it a bit of a lottery ticket anyway? Getting old kinda sucks, in our western culture, anyway. I mean there are 100yo people who are pretty fit and never cared about any of that stuff. Tbh i'm just a bit sick of caring too much about those kind of things, because it narrows my enjoyment for life. I didn't give a shit about those things in my youth and early 20s and i felt alot more free. Sometimes Ignorance can be Bliss, i guess I never have been really sick in my life tho. Maybe if i struggled with my health, like you have, i would think different about it.

I've tried to talk to some people about this (in real life and also in other forums) and nobody seems to get what im talking about. Its frustrating. A year ago I was tripping on acid and at the comedown I took my phone and started scrolling Youtube and Sadghuru video popped up. The video was called 'Infinity Meditation' or something like that. It consisted on following a white dot through the screen. What followed was one of the most intensely pleasure experiences of my life, if it wasn't the best one. I was able to focus so fucking deep into this dot that It felt like time was being "frozen" when I focused enough. Like time itself would stop moving, the sounds of the cars, dogs and bikes on the street would 'freeze', and then when I would unfocus on the dot, time would be 're-activated.' This wasn't hallucination of psychedelics, (also I was already at the comedown), but rather that my perception was in an state of consciousness so focused and intense that I suspect I was 'merging' with time using the focus of awareness. Truly mindfucky shit, but so fun. I know this is 'just' a non-dual state like many I´ve experienced other times in the past, with psychs and with meditation practices. But this was another level of des-integrating with reality and intensity of unity that it felt pure pleasure through all my body (actually calling it pleasure its kinda of false, its more like your body becoming bliss - reality itself, its so difficult to explain) Least to say I haven't able to fully replicate the experience totally sober. (Not that I tried that much). It's frustrating to have experienced this and being clueless how to produce this state again. It seems impossible. I guess I have to be thankful for having known that 'feeling'. And pray that after death that its what we experience for ever.

Outside of Winterknight I don't see this being talked about enough, and even he doesn't say it directly. This is the crux of self-realization. Nothing else matters. In this forum people are mostly interested in the relative content of the mind. Everyone is asking questions about morality, God, emotions, fear etc. Well sorry but none of these have anything to do with enlightenment. Also, you can't judge a person's enlightenment by what he believes in, because that stuff (again) has nothing to do with enlightenment. This is a misunderstanding that the mind of the enlightened person cannot hold beliefs etc. The only thing that does matter is identification. That is identification with the mind, the ego, the body, awareness etc. The typical person identifies with objects: I am this or that. The non-dual person identifies with: I am. Self-inquiry practitioners identify with: I-I. The self-realized person does not identify with any form of I, no matter how subtle, whatsoever. If this is the compass of your path, you will make it. If not you won't. What ends up happening is that through intensity of longing, surrender, witnessing and devotion your identification mechanisms will break down. You will never, ever go back to the illusions. What is the initial experience after enlightenment? Void would be saying too much. So ask yourself, is the only thing that there is void? If not, then you are deluded.

Realistically you may touch that point on retreat. If you are busy with worldy things on a day to day basis there is just no way you will be able to just pull up concentration when you want like that. The danger is using chemicals is the instant access to intense states of bodily bliss is that you may be so dissatisfied with the gradual slope of developing your mind through a mapped out path that you won't endure it long enough to attain to be able to to do that as you want