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All of this conceptualization about your self or ego going through some kind of transformation process is essentially a distraction from the amazingness and beauty of the present moment which is enlightenment. There is no process for enlightenment, you already are it.

Good luck with your transformation of rekindling magic! I've been trying to improve my spiritual life through daily habits for a year now and things have improved for me. Last year I was really lost and without a lot of vitality. Being consistent has helped me a lot. What kinds of meditations are you in to? Do you have any other spiritual practices?

You may have, or are, experiencing a form of Spiritual bypassing! I try not to use other people’s words and ideas when expressing some of my own thoughts, but in this case Luna & Sol managed to sum-up and provide useful examples of Spiritual Bypassing. In no way am I promoting their web site, other than to use their examples of Spiritual Bypassing, which I have been subject to and still battle to this day. https://lonerwolf.com/what-is-spiritual-bypassing/ The examples given below are just food for thought, and they may or may not add some practicality to those seeking expanded awareness and consciousness. “Spiritual bypassing, by Luna & Sol” The reality is that not everything in life is ‘love and light’ as is the slogan for many spiritual seekers. Pursuing the light and living enlightened and deeply interconnected existences is also about setting yourself on fire. It is about creating an inferno of your false beliefs, illusions and separating desires, ideals, and prejudices. It is about surrendering to the destruction of every limiting thing you ever thought and felt about yourself, other people, and the world. Spirituality is not always pretty. In fact, oftentimes it is the most shattering, tumultuous, and testing experience we can go through in life. The truth is that there are many types of spiritual bypassing that we sometimes don’t recognize (or refuse to recognize) in life. I have listed ten of the most common types below: I) The Optimistic Bypass We’ve all come across people in life who love to laugh and smile, yet seem to be forcefully optimistic. “Focus on the positive!” “See the glass as half full!” “Don’t let a frown get you down!” are some of the catchcries of these people who tend to use optimism as a way of avoiding the more somber and troublesome realities of life. The optimistic bypass is often a side product of anger-phobia, or the inability to deal with negative emotions. II) The Aggrandizement Bypass This is a type of self-delusion that some spiritual seekers use as a way of masking their perceived deficiencies and insecurities. The aggrandizement bypass is adopted by those who seek to feel enlightened, superior or having reached higher planes of existence. It is sometimes used by self-proclaimed masters, leaders, spiritually awakened souls, and gurus. III) The Victim Bypass When one becomes a victim of their gifts, or of other people, this takes away the pressure of responsibility for shaping a satisfying life and taking responsibility for one’s happiness – such is the case with the Victim Bypass. This type of spiritual bypass is often used by spiritual seekers who believe they have extrasensory gifts of some kind, but due to their gifts they are unable to feel happy or healthy. Identifying as an Empath is sometimes a good example of this type of bypassing, as it can be interpreted as the fault of other people and their emotions for behaving in self-destructive and volatile ways. Other labels, like being a clairvoyant, indigo child, starseed, gifted healer, and so on, can often fall into the Victim Bypass trap. IV) The Psychonaut Bypass Many spiritual seekers explore the frontiers of the mind, the soul, and reality through the use of psychedelic drugs such as LSD, DMT, psilocybin mushrooms, mescaline, and other entheogens that expand the mind and perception of existence. While this is a fascinating way of exploring reality, entheogens, like any other drug, can sometimes be used as a way of escaping reality and avoiding committing to personal development and soulful refinement. V) The Horoscope Bypass When we frequently look outside of ourselves for help and guidance, as is with the case with Horoscopes and Psychics, we are failing to tap into our inner wellsprings of wisdom and strength and are allowing external predictions to control the outcome of our lives. The Horoscope Bypass is derived from fear and mistrust of ourselves, our inability to make decisions, and our inability to deal with anything tough that comes our way. VI) The Saint Bypass As children, we were conditioned to believe that a “spiritual person” is always kind, compassionate, and saintly. In adulthood, we continue to repeat this story to ourselves, and sadly, it can cause us tremendous suffering. The Saint Bypass is a reflection of extreme “black or white” thinking, promoting the underlying belief that spiritual people can’t have dark sides because that would make them “unspiritual.” This type of bypass is essentially avoidance of one’s Shadow Self (dark side) by overcompensating with the guise of a sweet, heavenly, exterior. Self-sacrifice is a major symptom of this type of bypassing. VII) The Spirit Guide Bypass In some spiritual traditions, it is a God who protects, in others an angel, an animal or an ascended being. No matter who the Spirit Guide is, the belief that they are there to “protect” us is pleasing to the mind but ultimately constricting to the soul. When we place our faith in another being’s power to ward off danger and keep us safe, we are committing a classic spiritual bypass: avoiding responsibility for ourselves and our lives and sidestepping the tough development of courage and resilience. We are not children, but when we think of ourselves as being so we mold our lives in such a way that we fail to develop strength of spiritual character. Spirit guides serve to teach us rather than to babysit us. VIII) The Prayer Bypass Similar to the Spirit Guide Bypass, the Prayer Bypass circumvents personal responsibility by putting faith in a higher being to solve all of our problems and issues. While praying can be a healthy practice, it can easily become limiting and misguided. IX) The Guru Bypass Often it is beneficial to follow a guru, shaman or spiritual teacher to learn and grow. However, becoming too attached to them can rapidly turn into another form of spiritual bypassing. The temptation to begin worshiping (knowingly or unknowingly) these teachers means that we eventually forget the purpose of listening to them: to integrate the essence of their teachings. By treating the words of a guru or master as the irrefutable truth and failing to think for ourselves, we are starved of true spiritual growth and transformation on our spiritual journeys. X) The Finger-Pointing Bypass On our spiritual quests, we begin to see through the lies, delusions, and crazy behaviors committed by our fellow human beings and this can make us angry, downhearted, and frustrated. However, when we get caught up in “everything that is wrong” with the outside world and other people, dedicating our lives to the self-righteous quest of finger-pointing, this can be another form of spiritual bypassing. Finger-pointing instills us with a false sense of righteousness, taking away our responsibility of looking inside and working on ourselves. At its roots, the Finger-Pointing bypass is sourced from fear and avoidance and is a powerful form of procrastination. Food for though! Take what thoughts and ideas resonates, and store in your spiritual tool box those thoughts and ideas that don’t at this moment of now!

Hello everyone, To begin, it is my wish that all of you are currently experiencing a deeply fulfilling journey on the pathless path and that you are filled with loving-kindness. I also wish those whose path is colored by suffering, a resolution to that suffering and deliverance into peace. The question: There is a noticing that, as ego develops, its met with ever more challenging realisations about its own state of being. How can the ego best cope with these increasingly damning indictments, without freaking out every time it gets lost in thought? (Assuming a stable transformation into the awakened state has not yet occurred.) Here are some examples: that the ego is not safe, that it will definitely die and probably soon, that society is thoroughly more corrupt and out of control than it previously believed, that the systems it used to construct its current physical/social circumstances are also corrupt and no longer represent its interests, that its very own meaning making process is simply a process without meaning and thus all of its output has no truth value. From the perspective of this ego, it feels trapped between two worlds - one moment, its the peaceful state of presence and allowing. The next moment, its a state of emergency, hopelessness and panic. These new beliefs have simply replaced the old ones and fuck, they are way more scary!!

@BipolarGrowth It certainly takes money to make money and to be used as a catalyst to initiate change. I am confident that the transformation won't be catalyzed by someone like Bill Gates child, Elon Musk child or any other child of a billionaire, mainly because they are handicapped from the start. Their egos would not allow them to awaken to universal truths, which is why the Buddha renounced his wealth and empire to obtained enlightened. I personally work with people in all walks of life and can say there is something very different in people that come from generational wealth that makes their obstacles so severe that their extreme abundance is a hindrance. The matrix of their physical bodies and their brains are so dense its hard for them to awaken, which is why something like yoga and a vegetarian diet is often used to increase the plasticity of their bodies and minds, but even then for such people, they would have to kill themselves millions of times to have a chance in their present lifetime. I believe the base entry point to move in any direction does start off in the middle class and starts weaning off dramatically when you start getting into the centry millionaire level I believe the precursor is now and in the coming decades. The person is present, they are waiting for the world to be ready.

It's a great clip. But Alan Watts indeed lays out the steps/path for self-realization: - your wish to transform yourself, and your wish to become a better person, stems from a belief that you're separate person...which is an illusion! So thinking that way - alone - will never lead to any true transformation. - but yet, he says, it's absolutely important that we as a human race become more sane, more loving, more unselfish - what can you do then? - watch, observe, awareness - you then start to see the world, including the sense of 'I', is NOT something that is being pushed around or something that someone else is doing - it is realized to be a 'happening' -- going on by itself, for itself, out of itself - and THAT is The Real You, he says, not the symbol, not the person, but the whole of existence as a happening. You don't have to think about it. Let go of thoughts and 'you are still here' - in fact shining more clearly than ever ? - when you're looking out of your eyes, he says, you are looking at you! - he ends off by saying he doesn't know what we should do after we've realized this; thus he implies something "should" probably be done - he's just saying it's critical we realize our true nature first (and see ourself as whole and undivided, ... Just like a wave is something the whole ocean is doing, YOU are something the whole Universe is doing :-))

it is a pleasure and privilege to join this forum. I am so pleased to announce that my inner self recently rejected the ego machinery that has kept me unconscious for the last few years. Having chosen to be nothing and create life as a game in the mid 2000s , there were incredible and miraculous experiences experienced. over the last 5 or so years , I took a step back into an unconscious life. safe to say as I approached my late 30s (I'm 43 in 6 days), slowly the space for transformation closed up and meaning, fear and significance took over. I would say there was an event that I did not powerfully deal with, which was the passing of my father in August 2016 that was a turning point. luckily it was less of a challenge as I was blessed with the birth of a child at the end of November and that event made being unconscious just fine. all was great for a couple of years until the untrained ego machinery that runs the programming started to unravel quite significantly. with no conscious self involved, the primitive and limiting ego began struggling to make things work. the consequences were a marriage that was over in everything except title. living in separate parts of the house and just raising a daughter together. the ego continued to sabotage the plans that had been set by pushing for moving jobs and then not being satisfied and quitting said jobs. part of me that was conscious very rarely could see the machinery in action but no actions were taken to put my life plans back on the rails. when the lockdowns began in the UK, i was out of work for around 3 months. I found a new vice which was an online game that I began dedicating every waking moment to. to then make matters worse ( or exactly what was needed), through this online game, I managed to meet "the love of my life"in mid October. the human chemicals and machinery ran wild and we were addicted to each other like heroine addicts. she had a daughter and we discussed a life together. the only trouble was how to exit my current life. all my wealth, assets and fear of losing access to my daughter made the push for a quick divorce stall. by the end of January , my mistress, if I can call her that , was convinced that I would never leave my wife and I think decided to move on. from us permanently being joined at the hip on telegram and being in eachothers arms as often as we could, she lived 150 miles away, all contact was broken. in the realisation of that moment, something amazing happened. my self created identity completely unravelled and before I knew it, I was lost in a story of "intense grief". like a true drug addict, the withdrawal symptoms left my life void of any pleasure. I couldn't relate to my environment including my daughter. I went through fits of trying to contact her and initially she was receptive as she dealt with things on her side but eventually she had had enough of the intense neediness which is really the worst quality a partner can possess. a little light inside told me this was an opportunity to take control of my life. choose whether it was right to be in a marriage like this anymore. to get my career back on track and to awaken from this destructive slumber. within me was a sense of complete dissatisfaction around this ego based existence and this false construct of identity that had unravelled. initially on 26th January, I chose not to confront the inauthentic story regarding my relationship with Roo, while from a physical and mental perspective, she seemed the most compatible woman on every level I had ever met , I held onto the story that she had wronged me and abandoned me for someone else. that context around which I had set my belief system had me firmly trapped in the most intense grief and heartbreak I have ever experienced. from fits of despair and constant tears throughout the day , I chose to use exercise as therapy. that was all fine except there was not enough body to handle the level of exercise required to distract me from the despair. in the meantime I tried to push for a divorce too in case this would change Roo's mind. it didn't. the walls were closing in and all that existed was darkness. I was asleep. completely asleep. meditation and self hypnosis was the next fix, however, within the context of "the love of my life has abandoned me", the results were non consequential. it was only through confronting the lie, the lie that I had made up about my life and this situation and in fact my whole existence that finally created the space for something else to be possible. as a Buddhist may argue that any attachment outside ones self will lead to suffering and the conventional form of love, isnt true love. true love is unconditional. that is something I simply could not experience around Roo. I was completely addicted and was trapped in the human machinery. the ego led existence was in turmoil and disarray. something else is always possible... if you choose to see that your life is a construct and an interpretation of life which is not life. the big lie is the duality of having self being separate from the world. through this journey , I have discovered some amazing tools that I hope to share with anyone interested and this journal is mainly to chart my progress into acknowledging the wholeness and completeness of life , and also the wealth of resources out there. I am truly thankful and blessed to have met Roo, for not only is she true beauty wrapped in human form, but without her , I would not have opened this door into being awakened. I am at a stage where I can pray for her health, happiness and fulfillment and especially that she finds love in her life, someone that can be there for her and support her and love her and her beautiful child. I love you Roo, you saved me. you are my miracle and I acknowledge your immense strength, character and your delicious inner kindness and sensuality which I never knew could exist. I fell asleep at the wheel and you were the catalyst that led to my reawakening. I now am where I always dreamed to be... nowhere. I am who I always wanted to be...no one. my life has all the meaning I could hope for... it means absolutely nothing.

Alright, I watched the enlightened episodes. The animated porn wasn't really my thing, but I guess it was nice. Zima Blue was a really great story. The cybernetic transformation for art reminded me of Genesis P-Orridge and his wife surgically altering themselves to resemble each other and become like a single entity.

@Kalo Interesting, thanks. I agree; A healthy dose of a healthy ego is necessary to navigate through life. It is when the ego is wounded or inflated that it tends to cause 'trouble'. And that requires some 'work'. To me; peace and fulfilment feel natural. Hate feels like something I picked up/accumulated along the way. No one is born hateful. Regarding acceptance; I'd say there is true and false acceptance. For example; I could be broke AF and then continue sitting on my ass, doing nothing, feeling like shit, thinking that's what acceptance is. When in fact it's resistance in disguise. True acceptance would be me saying: 'ok, I'm broke AF and I'm obviously not happy about it, so let's try and do something about that. Let's find a way to generate an income. Yet another example; someone could be staying in an abusive relationship thinking that's what acceptance is. 'Oh, it's ok that they continuously abuse me. I accept them for who they are.' When true acceptance would be packing your shit and getting the hell away from that situation. My point is; acceptance does not prevent change or transformation. In fact; it is what motivates us take proper action. When true acceptance dawns; change happens naturally. Not trying to say you're doing anything wrong though. Just offering another perspective. Hope you or someone else finds it helpful.

Observe yourself. Understand yourself. Your motives, behaviours, values, needs, strengths, shortcomings... Be kind and respectful towards yourself. Honor your process of transformation. Give yourself time and space when overwhelmed. Take care of your body (nutrition, hygiene, grooming...) Try making choices that are in alignment with your's and everyone else's well-being. How would you treat a child in pain? That's more often than not exactly how we should treat ourselves. Problem is; most of us don't feel worthy of that kind of loving attention. Or we simply do not know how to do it. We feel like someone else should do it for us. That's ok. All of us struggle with this to some degree. It's a challenge - for sure. But it's worth it. You are worth it.

You still have a desire for meaning, no? A desire for transformation over improvement? A desire for desire itself?

Here are some beautiful systems thinking concepts to contemplate and enrich your thought process with: - Synergy - Emergence - Threshold - Transformation - Transmutation - Catalyst - Wave - Membrane - Mutualism - Evolution - Whole - Dynamic - Relativity - Environmental health - Innovation - Complex coordination - Elasticity - Paradigm - Network / Net - Critical mass - Escape velocity - Gestalt - Harmony - Resonance - Hive - Seed - Unfold - Balanced interchange - Spectrum - Taijitu (aka the Yin Yang symbol) - Transcendence - Renaissance Some of these words actually transcend systems and penetrate deeper into holism, but that's fine. Systems is how we describe imaginary subsets of the whole within the limitation of concepts. Let's embrace this beautiful wisdom and welcome World 2.0.

Chapter One, subchapter four: A Capitalist Spirituality. "This has come about partly because proponents of mindfulness believe that the practice is apolitical, and so the avoidance of moral inquiry and the reluctance to consider a vision of the social good are intertwined Laissez-faire mindfulness lets dominant systems decide such questions as "the good". It is simply assumed that ethical behavior will arise "naturally" from practice and the teacher's "embodiment" of soft-spoken niceness, or through the happenstance of inductive self-discovery. However, the claim that "major ethical changes come intrinsically from paying attention to the present moment, non-judgementally" is patently flawed. The emphasis on "non-judgmental awareness" can just as easily disable one's moral intelligence. It is unlikely that the Pentagon would invest in mindfulness if more mindful soldiers refused en masse to go to war. Mindfulness is the latest iteration of a capitalist spirituality whose lineage dates back to the privatization of religion in Western societies. This began a few hundred years ago as a way of reconciling faith with modern scientific knowledge. The private experience could not be measured by science, so religion was internalized. Important figures in the process include the nineteenth-century philosopher William James, who was instrumental in psychologizing religion, as well as Abraham Maslow, whose humanistic psychology provided the impetus for the New Age movement. In Selling Spirituality: The Silent Takeover of Religion, Jeremy Carrete, and Richard King argue that Asian wisdom traditions have been subject to colonization and commodification since the eighteenth century, producing a highly individualistic spirituality, perfectly accommodated to dominant cultural values and requiring no substantive changes in lifestyle. Such individualistic spirituality is clearly linked to the neoliberal agenda of privatization, especially when masked by the ambiguous language used in mindfulness. Market forces are already exploiting the momentum of the mindfulness movement, reorienting its goals to a highly circumscribed individual realm. Privatized mindfulness practice is easily coopted and confined to what Carrette and King describe as an "accommodationist orientation" that seeks to "pacify feelings of anxiety and disquiet at the individual level rather than seeking to challenge the social, political and economic inequalities that cause such distress." "However", as Ron Purser points out, "the commitment to a privatized and psychologized mindfulness is political." "It amounts to what Byung-Chul Han calls "psycho-politics", in which contemporary capitalism seeks to harness the psyche as a productive force. Mindfulness-based interventions fulfill this purpose by therapeutically optimizing individuals to make them "mentally fit", attentive and resilient so they may keep functioning within the system. Such capitulation seems like the farthest thing from a revolution and more like a quietist surrender. Mindfulness is positioned as a force that can help us cope with the noxious influence of capitalism. But because what it offers is so easily assimilated by the market, its potential for social and political transformation is neutered."

@Chew211 Yes and no. This may seem like me trying to protect my beliefs, but hear me out, the truth is more nuanced than how I made it appear in my original post. For reasons that would take too long to explain here, it was a conscious choice I made to not focus on relationships in my teenage years and early twenties, but I still engaged in relationships, 2 that lasted for a consequent amount of time, so it's not just preconcieved ideas I hold about women, but actual experience, and although I know that I'm trying to force a certain reading of the situation (biased towards making me feel good about myself) the truth is still counter-intuitive, because as far as I know, I've always been as transparent as I can be with the women I've been with. Now, the biggest regret I hold, what is eating at me is me not taking the appropriate response I feel I should've taken (going "polyamourous", openning up sexually) and trying to force whatever relationship I was in to yield the outcome I was after. I feel that I shot myself in the foot and I can't come to grasp with my past decisions. This is the origin of the resentment I hold inside. And I find it difficult now to go past that, to create a new reality where I am winning on my own terms, and where any woman I would be with is winning too. Feelings are my guiding compass when it comes to human relationships in general, and I know now that I need to go through a complete transformation, I know what I want but I don't know how to achieve it, consciously, like having a vision of who I wanna be and actually manifesting that.

Feeling quite creative today. So I just thought of this fun way to share a few 'life advices' that I wish my dad (that I never really had) would've told me. Maybe you have a few of your own advices/pointers that you'd like to add. I would appreciate that a lot. So here's what's coming to my mind right now: 1. Son. You feeling good about yourself and being happy will most likely piss off a lot of people that do not feel good about themselves and are not happy. 2. Son. Do not seek love in another. Find love within your own heart and then share it and celebrate with someone who has found love within themselves. 3. Son. Sometimes you will have to do things that you do not like or enjoy. It's just how growth and transformation is. Sometimes you will have to push yourself a little bit. Sometimes you will have to endure tension in order to break through to that next level. And I trust you will. I know you can do, achieve and accomplish anything you put your mind and heart to. The power is within you. 4. Son. Remember these words: Finance before romance. Trust me on this one. Do not risk your financial security for a romantic relationship. It's just not going to work out fine. Do not prioritize a partner over the money that's supposed to put food on your table and keep a roof over your head. First take care of your own safety and then search for a partner. 5. Son. Not everyone has your best interest in their minds. Truth is; most people you will encounter will not give a damn about you and your well-being. They are too busy serving their own agendas. Their own needs. No need to feel sad about that. It's just how life is. Everyone has free will and some use it to run over others. Be careful not to be ran over. Careful who you trust. ⬆️⬆️⬆️ So that's what came through for now... Might add more later. Peace.

I have also felt that I wasn't fully valued at home.. And I agree with your logic here.. As I left the school where I was bullied, I could find some good friends in other locations where I lived and I somehow felt I was important. I was introduced to serious spirituality in the mean time when I was 18; I had a life changing epiphany, something that I could reproduce again and again with meditation. I did a lot of mindfulness and witnessing meditation.. I had to wait for a spiritual transformation that happened in 2014 for my social awkwardness and feeling of not being good enough socially to fully disappear..

This is simply false. You need to talk to more serious meditators who have gone through depression. A combination of hardcore practice, meds and therapy is a powerful healing combo. Again you need to talk to more serious meditators. This is simply false and there are ample anecdotes proving otherwise. It’s clear you are not speaking from direct experience or if you are, you’re not speaking from an advanced level. Get 5000+ hours of personal practice under your belt and then talk about how on demand happiness, equanimity, ease, spaciousness, concentration, etc. are. They are very on demand assuming physical health and physical safety needs are taken care of and stable. Yet there are still plenty of anecdotes of people with terminal and chronic pain illness facing it with radically less levels of less suffering than the average human because of hardcore meditation practice. All of this should be deeply challenged. How many hours of personal practice have you accumulated? Do you have a daily practice? Do you skip sessions? How long is your daily practice? How many retreats have you gone on? How many books and real masters have you studied with, watched videos on, or read the books of? How much personal contemplation or journaling on meditation and transformation have you done? Do you honestly think the most complex system known to man is incapable of upgrading its own neurotransmitters? Do you think The Buddha who was swimming in hedonism until his mid 20s was naturally enlightened and the hardcore asceticism/thousands of hours practice had no bearing or effect on his neurotransmitter composition? Not trying to be aggressive here and Im also not directing this comment at you specifically but anyone reading the thread. It’s very clear Leo has a huge bias on this topic yet we should consider 1) Leo’s relative lack of experience, 2) his health issues which will 100% affect his results with manual practice, and 3) the ego’s self deception mechanisms and how it’ll do anything to justify not sitting in the void of personal boredom. Personally questioning we’re so averse to boredom and the ordinary state is critical towards bridging the gap between these absurdly powerful psychedelic states and the ordinary waking experience. Taking on the belief that such a bridge is impossible to build is a huge trap on the psychedelic path and as you’ll discover upon deep inquiry, an incredibly subtle defense mechanism of the ego. Defend the genetic spiritual talent argument all you’d like. But in 10 years when you’re still suffering, still having to use psychedelics to get reach god consciousness, well... hopefully it doesn’t take 10 years to see the emptiness of this position ?

It would seem like you are not happy with the current situation that you're in. However in your mind, you think that it is way too hard to change the circumstances in your current state. So there are two forces at play here, one is you have a strong urge to change and transform yourself based on I would guess a very negative motivation. The other is a strong resistance of pain, because you've already worked so hard to get this far. Maybe you realized you went in the wrong direction at some place in your life and now you're so tired you want to rest, you just don't have any energy left to work on the transformation you want at the moment. These two forces create a big conflict and it is very normal to have conflicting emotions as well. On the surface, you desperately wish you could change something about your life, but in the inside you actually want to avoid the pain of "loss" or behaving in a way you deem "unworthy". This is probably why you are avoiding positive emotions, because once you express your positive emotions, there would be more room for you to feel more negative emotions, the emotions you want to escape right now. Your deep consciousness seems to know that there is a huge amount of work you need to do in order to get where you want to be. However you want to avoid thinking about that, because the Truth is sometimes unbearable. You need to know the greatest transformations in life always starts with realizing how "low" or "bad" your current state is. Sometimes external accidents even, to force people to realize the Truth. If you are able to find peace with yourself right now, you will embark on a new journey towards a higher level in your life. What you need to do now is to very slowly identify where the huge pain is in your emotions. Clarify the points that are causing these painful emotions and gradually feel in the pain very consciously. Normal people would just keep on evading the pain by distracting themselves non-stop. This would only bury the pain deeper and deeper until they've lost touch with the source of their problems. Then I would suggest talking with a very close friend, someone you could say anything to and is willing to listen. Express the kind of negative emotions your are experiencing right now, and what are causing them. Do this until you get very conscious about what you don't accept about yourself. What you need right now is rest, the conscious type of rest. You need to stop trying to change and just simply be and observe yourself. Feel in the pain and let the source of the pain be your future motivation to achieve greatness.

@Epikur OMG I love this guy! He has such a great energy! I like the way he edits the video Thanks for sharing! I learned new tricks I can reach orgasms without touching myself. Those visualization practices are paying off ahahhah! I actually started developing photographic memory, I can hold a picture (system) and see it from different perspectives, can't wait to have more free time to master it ! I am 21. century Leonardo da Vinci Transformation and Mastery. If you don't believe in those then getta fuck outa here hahahaha

I think that all you need to do is accept them, and if you can't do that then at the bare minimum, then leave them alone. it isn't really anyone's place or concern to decide for another person if they need help, or if they are just fine. There are many spiritual explanations for these sorts of things. Ultimately, underneath it all, you probably just want to judge and decide for these people what their identity is, and to mold them into what you think is right without having the qualifications or the psychology to even understand such people. It makes you more destructive than people who are just living their own lives, not bothering you in any way. People like that are secret control freaks trying to use those who are the easiest targets to hurt. In many shamanic cultures, animal totems and spirit guides are frequently used - and even embodying the animal spirit. I see people will views that Leo has instilled that are just as harmful. This place is collectively, kind of an echo chamber, a bit of a waste bin for those too cowardly to do genuine spiritual work, and to understand the depth that it takes to understand one's self. Sexual transmutation is another thing, and it offers solutions to trauma, removes blockages, helps to integrate identity and so forth. I would argue that no one here is qualified to judge any of these people as I don't see anyone who has undergone a spiritual transformation with any degree of genuine depth whatsoever. What I have noticed, is that this place has become a collective where everyone runs around watching what everyone else is doing instead of focusing on themselves and doing their own work, and when you do it, it does become highly individualized. If you don't understand this, then you're just a cardboard cutout of the real thing. You could very well cause damage to another person with your presumptions about who they are - on top of that, those presumptions stick - you end up adding more confusion, it directs people away from where they should be. I mean, you are taking vulnerable people with identity issues and inserting who YOU think they should be. How do you think that is genuinely going to go for someone? It tells me that the "shark" in certain people can sniff this out in someone and that is ultimately what they are trying to dig at, because it is right there and easy to do. It is on the level of deciding for someone how they should deal with death, cancer, life purpose or anything else, really. Sexuality is deeply personal. By shaming people you cut off any chance they have to heal. I question sometimes if that is really, underneath it all, the end goal of people who latch onto those who are so outwardly vulnerable. It's subtly corrosive. I don't dig it. Each time you poke at such people, you take away any chance at all they have of healing in any real way, you "restart" a transformative process and corrupt another person's innermost self and call it caring. It's not. It's just control. Sexuality takes you back, it is primitive and essential in order to integrate the lower three chakras. If you have not understood it to the best of your ability you will never heal or understand yourself. How people do this, as long as it does not harm anyone, is their business.

@intotheblack What we need is a transformation in the way society sees men in general. Especially male sexuality. This will reduce the anti-male biases, which will make the false accusations go down. Which, in turn, will make the real ones more believable and the real criminals more accountable.

Admittedly, it's a long road. For deep transformation to occur via meditation, usually progress comes in watershed moments. We're going along, and it feels like nothing is happening. We sit, and sit, and sit... things continue to feel stale. Hell, we may even experience a backsliding where sitting feels worse. And then suddenly, often out of nowhere, there is an opening, an awakening wherein we step into deeper territory. Suddenly we have more equanimity for whatever is arising, there is a subtly to our experience previously unnoticed, there is an intrinsic beauty to experience we miss when the mind is too active both at the conscious and unconscious levels. Often times meditation progress is like an earth quake. An earth quake doesn't just suddenly and spontaneously happen, though the end result is quite sudden and spontaneous. An earth quake's origins are from very slow, small, cumulative shifts in tectonic plates. These shifts are extremely gradual yet lead to explosive and transformative results. The same mechanism is occurring with meditation, and particularly with facing these hinderances such as boredom, or loneliness as you referenced. I say all this to say, keep going. Trust whatever force inside of you is calling you to sit down and turn within, which is meditation. Trust that even when the surface level of mind and consciousness show little signs of transformation, there are deep rewirings and transformations occurring in the depths below the threshold of awareness. But on a slightly contradictory note, if your intuition is telling you to back off from practice because the boredom is too extreme, that's cool too. Nearly everything in life waxes and wanes over time. If you back off, you'll feel when you're ready to expand into more rigorous practice. I'd say more important than forcing yourself to sit through boredom is to have a daily practice in place. There is a significance in the cumulative aspect of meditation. Daily sits compound over time independent of the time spent sitting. But as I mentioned in the original reply, yes there is something to be gained by traveling into the boredom. Yet there is something to be gained by re-grouping and backing off. Part of the path is learning to listen, interpret, and trust what our gut is telling us. Hope this helps in some way.

Transcendental Empathy (core tenet of communication) ======================= The following requires a lot of psychological development as well as being a unique portal into consciousnesses further development into more than just less than obvious ways. Traveling the Earth Into the blue Into the yellow And all things mellow And all things dark Light a spark That’s the art Of empathy Transcendental communication across the planet Communicating with beings all around the world Through imagination alone is it Perhaps But why is that not just the beginning of the enquiry into the nature of that reality To journey across the lands Gain wisdom that I could never experience first hand Beyond consciousnesses middle-band Exploring the heights, the skies, the heavens and the hells What is this concrete formulation in any moment? This moment of discovery rediscovers its unencapsulated mystery Geometry that has more bends than we can comprehend To speak to the angry To speak to the elated In doing so, Learning to communicate and adore all As I simulate, I create Multiplicities That force the emergence of reshaping pictures That encapsulate the sound of the previously non-transmissible The chaotically untraceable, and destructive Into a peaceful melody That you can hear outside of prejudice And instead with the ears of understanding, like God’s Take me to New York and listen to the footsteps of thoughts at Times Square Or to observe the curious eye gazing under the Eiffel tower Or take me to a funeral to experience the myriad of experiences of the people paying their respects (and sometimes other) Or to the end of a grand final football match to experience both the jubilation and the sorrow of thousands of fans The destiny of life finds itself in these moments that live in the gaps of experience that make up the observation of human beings How they have resolved within themselves To comprehend and experience the life they live Through their perceptions, their painted curiosities, tainted sorrows, pure intentions and not so This is the journey of mind Via empathy and imagination The capacity to travel the globe, and even into the realms of beings from outer space To listen to how they communicate, feel the depth of their understandings in their reactions to the life they experience in their subtleties and unexpected pondering's Take the elevator in your mind to the heights and deepest levels To the highest, you experience the greatest depths of existence including the capacity to communicate with any being anywhere in the universe and through that experience transcendental empathy To the lowest, you will experience the greatest depths of self, including the capacity to communicate with aspects of yourself in alternate realities, past lives and “dream selves” And everywhere in between to prepare, experience and teach the self anything you wish to teach it (fly a plane, enter into a war at any time in history, etc) as well as travel to any time in history across the universe, including any future time This is transcendental empathy, excellence in imagination and an ingenious portal to wisdom, insight and transformation The mirror of consciousness that reflects back to you your capacity to walk through life with ease, joy, love, truth and of course, the chaotic pursuit into the unknown for transcendent evolution of the self ==================== okay here we go better presentation I'm sure plenty of people can resonate with this (an unlisted improvisation for A list exclusivity ----- haven't sang or "guitared" for a few days")

From an absolute perspective, yes, of course. But as a self, you didn't create actualized.org, neither does it's existence is dependent exclusively on your finite mind. There are more finite minds that can distinct actualized.org within the reality of the self. So, I don't really see the point of what you are saying. If you realized your True and Absolute nature, congrats and hooray. Enlightenment is key in proceeding into transformation in accordance with what is Truth. But even after Enlightenment, you continue to exist as a separate self in a relative reality. If you are not speaking from direct consciousness, then you are in a complex condition my friend, because then your post will based on belief or hearsay, and I get the sense that this is the case for you. Nevertheless, I hope I'm wrong.

^ this is what's known as "psychic buildup". Both the build-up, the necessary release and the nuanced learning that follows completely changes the dynamics that further result, the future is unequivocally never the same again. So never foil with action, you plant fruit on the life that is you a tree without you even being aware. This is why I don't underestimate the simplicity of the act of just simply venting. You can easily become self-judging afterwards, believing yourself to have done exactly that, "foiled action", not realising that the judgement itself is a part of the false standard that needed to be a part of the learning that changed all the elements in sum. Once you break that barrier, where you're able to vent and learn without judgement, you open up channels to higher levels of being within yourself; you're free from the societally prescribed limits they put on your capacity to self evolve. You'll see yourself change in unpredictable but ultimately, paramount ways. Releasing that inner critic by seeing it as a part of the transmutation process which motivated you to vent in the first place will allow you to not see the inner critic as separate but instead as noted, a part of a whole gestalt that needs to transform. I mean what are the alternatives: Get caught in a "neurotic love" or a "neurotic" anything if relationship entanglements aren't the corresponding example here? On neurotic love, that is, the kind of love that you never intended for. Both intentionality and fluid non-intentions are vital for real love. She's invaded my psychic space, I didn't ask nor do I want her too. Her feelings are natural but so is my venting. One of us has to do it, I'm the more advanced one so I have to, followed by learning from those energies that's a bit like vomiting. She just simply does not have a chance. I won't need to do a thing now really to show that because I've changed the psychic space via this transformation here. The potential social problem will vanish because I've gone through (nearly the whole way) the transformation without anybody knowing. It changes their thoughts before it even changes mine, I've removed any awkwardness by altering my frequency. This is how this works. This is how the universe works, everything we do matters in this sense as the universe is the matter that is constantly evolving in the sum of it all; there are no distinct colours, they're all always blended and blending together into one energetic psychic all/whole. I don't give a fuck about the status quo, which is why any kind of needless self judgement exists when the action was a vital part of our transformation. Society and its social standards can kiss my ass, revolution to evolution is far more vitally and existentially important to me. Society needs to evolve, I'll meet it on the other side. Rinse, repeat; see your metamorphosis on the other side, others see you as the same person, you're not. You've changed now. You're more useful to the universes ongoing expansion now.