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@Joseph Maynor There is no one with a "higher Awareness", dear Joseph. Awareness is the father of all living entities. What Many however fail to see because of their poor unstable intellect is That Awareness is The only living ONE. You my friend do not have "another Awareness" then any other entity. Awareness is the all pervading sun That shines through and controles all living entities. By Him you forget, remember and get knowledge. So, You and any other is at its root already enlightened which is the primal core. We Therefore speak only of cloudedness That has the root Lust, or can be called: impure desires. And we speak of those who are free from bondage and are thus cloudless. Both are however sharing the same Awareness. Depending upon ones state one sees the living one in all and all within the self, or one sees different awarenesses. Far less understand Awareness to be personified. Awareness is an universal form or impersonal form of the Personified Living ONE. In other words the father, Awareness or God, is a person. Only those in devotional service will be able to understand Awareness personified. Which can be attained by pointing all senses including the mind at the Living ONE performing service according religious principles (yoga). Over time all cloudedness will be gone by the grace of the Living ONE. Thus, Awareness can be defined by Many names such as: God, Living ONE, one with Many Eyes, the controller of all, the ONE without cause, all attractive one, one who knows no equal or greater, the one dweilling in all without attachments, the personified One, etc. Ahayah Ashar Ahayah Joseph. Chant and be free!

@Socrates Reality has no substance my friend. It is the Only Living substance by what is apart from it is nothing at all. Reality is the most subtle of subtle which is the source, sustainer and cause of all causes. Reality is the alpha and the omega the truth and the light. Reality is The Living ONE situated in all hearts as ONE. Reality is but an impersonal name for You, or You That is personified- seen in a universal form which is the ONE controller over all living entities. Reality = Living ONE. Ahayah Ashar Ahayah Socrates. Chant and be free!

Different tratiotions view this differently, so there are no objective answer. Buddha thought enlightenment as consisting of four stages where reaching each stage gives a direct glimse of emptiness, and leads to a permanent shift of the mind. He allso taught that insight into non-self is just one of the three fundamental insights into the nature of reality (along with nonsatisfacoriness and impermanence) required for enlightenment. Geffory Martin has performed depth interviews with 1000s of contemplatives from most major contemplative traditions, who are viewed as highly realized within their own respective tradition. His conclusion is that there are roughly four different categories of cognitive/phenomenological shifts that practitioners can experience, depending on the methods used. These include shifts in sense of self, emotions, thought paterns etc. All of these can be viewed as "enlightenment" / the ultimate spiritual goal from various contemplative traditions. F.i, in the christian/bramanistic mystical traditions the endpoint is a sense of unity with gods love/allness, which is stage three in Martins scheme. In Buddhism the endpoint is eradication of the sense of there being a Self (There is no core in your mind that is "me". Our mind is just some kind of hierarchi of partialy cooperating, partialy competing mental processes that produce mental phenomena that constantly apear and disapear in a field of awareness, which is also not "you", but just another impersonal mental mechanism/aggregate), combined with insight into impermanence and dissatisfactoriness.

Your paradigm. The only one that truly matters. It's a bit counter-intuitive. All truth is internal not external, personal not impersonal. Physics, or any conceptual body of knowledge for that matter, only matters to the extent that it matters to you. To the extent that you can take those insights and weave them into your ever-evolving worldview, that's what matters. Much of what we learn dies away. It's what we keep that is important. And that always comes back to your paradigm. That toolkit of concepts, heuristics, and expectations that you carry around with you and actually work with on a daily basis. What's in there? How can you improve it? How can exposure to Leo's ideas help you to improve that toolkit? Conversely, how can that bum on the street that tried to hustle money off you help you improve that toolkit? See, it's all you optimizing your knowledge grab-bag, your toolkit. It's all about your paradigm and taking responsibility for improving it, for honing it. It's all about what does this information do for you that is the relevant issue. Always. And then when you get a broad paradigm built, you might be so abundant that you condescend to advise others, because you've likely made every mistake in the book by that point and want to reduce suffering of others. This is, in part, what makes person want to be a philosopher or teacher or guru or whatever you want to call it. Mastery of that knowledge grab-bag and seeing that worldview for what it is. Nice! I got away with using a sentence fragment there.

Okay a little soon for an update but hey I have a bit of time now. So today so far I remained I would say 70-75% aware. I had many things to take care of so my main focus was the task at hand, but when an emotion arose I stopped and increased awareness to 100%. I notice that it is the smallest triggers that create a snowball such a large emotional reaction. The biggest issue today was my ego leaving the present to push me to the future to rush through what I am presently doing. The ego leaving like that creates anxiety, frustration and an inability to focus. This I noticed would cause me to become frustrated at small things in the present that are not going perfectly, which I noticed in the past create a mental disconnect which causes mistakes to happen. So yesterday I didnt make much of an effort to remain aware. I just kind of winged it like I usually have in the past. I never really saw a need for further awareness because I had defeated the flaws in my personality to control perceived negative emotions. Now I realize that I can't really have too much awareness. I know that I need to further my consciousness as the universe never really allows me to settle with what I have. I noticed yesterday from the lack of effort. I really didnt have a great day. I was exhausted and a bit neurotic. Comparing yesterday to Monday is like day and night. Monday was amazing, beautiful, full of life and love. I must keep going to realize the differences of no progression and progression. I am now getting ready to work. This I feel will be a challenge. Edit Today has been interesting. I challenged myself at the beginning of today to keep my awareness and to have fun with the challenge of staying awake. It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. It was soothing almost. Like everything is going to be okay because your hero is here, and nothing can go wrong now. I like this feeling. During meditation I was able to glimpse the beauty of the universe. But when it came to making it a part of me it was never a part fully. Because I would meditate and stop. It truly has been an extreme boost to my consciousness evolution to understand the importance of this full awareness. Another thing I would like to add. I know this sounds crazy, but now that I am being more aware. I am getting the feeling of being watched a lot. But not like some one is watching.... More like something? Like the world around me is watching me more and responding to my change in awareness. This is just a physical sensation that I keep getting so who knows! Another thing I have gathered today is that.... I work with people over the phone. I used to hate it because its so impersonal and I do talk to a lot of people. Its emotionally draining. Or it was? Turns out with awareness its actually empowering in a way. But anyways... When I interact with people I feel very connected to them with this heightened awareness. Like I hear their voice and instantly feel how they are feeling, respond in a way that somehow brings them to a good energy helps them remember the beauty of the world if not for a moment. What I am observing brings something I learned about years ago (isnt that always the case with this work lol). Anyways, it brings back something that really resonated with me. Service to self or service to others. This theory is basically that when you are constantly trying to take take take, the universe responds with resistance. But when you are giving giving giving... The universe changes and responds with an abundant world. Its the whole fractal thing. The way you see things is how they become, we are but living beings in a fractal universe reflecting our consciousness right back at us. This is what I believe from my research anyways. So. I couldn't comprehend this giving. Not really. I was resistant, I would force, frustration would result and repeat. I came from a very dog eat dog family, mindset, world. This is why I only recently realized how amazing cooking is. If you really break cooking down. Its a very loving giving thing. You are taking pain away from others. You are nourishing their life, their happiness.. Giving them time to do other things they would rather do instead of cook. This to me is an ultimate service to others thing. Its funny because in my family cooking was never special, it sucked, it was a huge inconvenience and it often led to a fight on who would cook. Subconsciously this actually led to severe anxiety when thinking about cooking, cooking, washing dishes, looking for recipes to cook, grocery shopping. Once I became aware this previously scarred activity became nothing, I wouldnt get anxiety but I never wanted to cook. Because a tiny tiny part of me still resisted. Not until full awareness came did I realize this resistance and put the whole puzzle together. Its a silly thing. But that is what we are, we get a microscopic resistance and it snowballs into a monster in my life. I believe the path of awareness is us literally decreasing the tolerance we have for these negative influences over and over till we realize happiness resides within the awareness itself. Today has been a good day. One thing I want to make sure I have stressed is that because I have changed today, the world changed how it approaches me. I talk to people from all over the world. My consciousness somehow changed how they approach me. What I do is fast paced and stressful, yet I am almost finished and I am not exhausted. From a high awareness great day on Monday, to a exhausting no awareness Tuesday, to a high awareness no exhaustion Wednesday... Interesting.

@Joseph Maynor It's like asking ocean if it believes it 'creates' waves. The Absolute is impersonal and doesn't have beliefs. All that can be said is what's happening is a mystery and 'we' are on a wild ride. Good luck to all of 'us'

God (Isvara- In Vedanta) is a personification of the impersonal "dharma field" (the manifest universe). Isvara is the creator-sustainer-destroyer of all of manifestation, which governs the physical, psychological, moral/ethical laws, as well as dishing out cause and effect relating to karma (action). Isvara came into being by a power within pure awareness itself called Maya, which created the illusion or appearance of the phenomenal world.

Don't worry. You can always find ways to resolve emotional issues even if they are established in childhood. So, it can get better. One thing that's helped me is to recognize that I'm just part of an impersonal pattern. So, my issues were mainly with my mom, and I've carried a lot of anger toward her. However, I see now that she really didn't see herself as being in the wrong and even was able to convince herself that she has the best intentions for me. I also see that she is the way she is due to her upbringing, and that my grandparents are the way they are due to their upbringing, and so on and so on. Most people don't do intentionally malicious things. So, in seeing this, it's easier to give forgiveness on this level. Once you've let go to a certain degree, you can start to face the emotions head on with awareness. If you focus on how the body and mind work together to create the experience of trauma, you'll get new insights into why the trauma reaction is so tenacious in the first place. If you focus on the emotional reactions that arise in the body with full awareness, it will enable you to process through the most negative stored emotions.

Hey -- What you have is a great vision, and who's to say it will stop there? We never "arrive", anyways." Go as far as you can see, and when you see farther, go farther" (or something like that). They say that when humans try to conceive of themselves being 10+ years older, the part of their brain that activates is the same part that conceives of a stranger. Even thinking of ourselves 5 years ahead makes us feel detached and impersonal subconsciously, so it's really hard to set meaningful goals beyond a certain point. And by changing yourself into a more conscious person, you will change the world. Think of the impact it will have on your friends and family to see this radical transformation: from no degree to degree, to being fit and healthy, fulfilling career... etc. Finding your Life Purpose will also change the world - Leo has a whole course on it Best of luck! Saba

Look at experience really closely. Forget the extraneous concepts and loaded meanings of words like awareness, which have about 6 or 7 different meanings, most of which suggest that something is aware of something else. This creates a ton of space for the self to pick and choose which one suits is, but the word or meaning that one seems to attach to the meaning is missing what is being pointed to. It creates discussions that feel important, but generally devolve into people asserting whose meaning of awareness is correct. The reason the word is used is just to express what is absolutely indescribable. Is it your experience that you control your thoughts? When you look at it, Do you honestly know what your next thought will be? If you look honestly, past the surface level. you will see that thoughts just pop up from absolute nothing. They appear. It may seem that they are willed, but generally they just appear when something needs to be explained or understood. They are mental interpretations that just happen to explain what is whether that is a problem, an emotion, or another thought. There is 0 control over what happens, and there is zero control over the mental interpretation that tries to make a conceptual model to explain what is happening. In my experience, when the feeling of control fell away when thoughts were watched, it was seen that if thoughts appear from nothing, then there cant be any free will, because the genesis of any intention or decision is an idea or thought, or at least I thought that. Really things just happen, but either way, its the same thing. What does a decision look like for you? When does the decision happen, and when does the thinking happen. In my experience, Observation showed that although I originally thought that thinking preceded a thought, actually a more honest answer is that there would be a decision, and then thinking would happen in the form of rationalization. This means the mind would start creating stories to explain what was decided. First there would be a story that made sense to the self, then there would be stories created for other individuals. It is like the self making a story based on the model it has of other peoples models. It wants the perfect story to explain the decision so that it can deliver the right story to each person so that it might make sense of whats happening. Then I thought, well, what about the times where it seems that I am thinking and then coming to a decision? But again, thoughts just appear. They do not belong to the self. So either way, there is a decision and thoughts which both arise from nothing. The order doesn't even matter. If mental activity just appears in the conscious mind, there is no meaningful choice. It's a complete and utter illusion The best saying that I have heard is: "A man can do what he wills but he cannot will what he wills." I don't know how anyone can argue with that, because no one can control the thoughts that appear in consciousness. People will argue with it, because it's not a very happy thing for the self, or maybe it doesn't fit in with other concepts that are held, but the thing is that reality or what happens doesn't give a fuck about conceptual understanding or a self's attempt to project its thought onto what is. How could it? The thoughts are actually a part of reality, they occur inside of it, and they are abstract. Therefore thoughts themselves are not reality (no matter how much the self wishes that to be true). It is completely impersonal and totally intimate. This is why it is important to remember that a contradiction between what meaning is assigned to concept in ones mind vs. what is being pointed to does not mean that something is wrong. Reality is totally unknowable. It exists outside of concepts. It is only a thought (the self) that is trying to lock it down into the known that causes contradiction. This is pretty simplistic as an explanation, and I'm not saying that conceptual understanding is bad, but just advising some caution. This is especially so when the subject is something as fundamental as free agency. Just look really closely and honestly at your experience. Reality and being is where some of the answers can be supplied.

The minute a person thinks that life is happening to them, a victim is born. Reality is impersonal, it just happens as it does regardless of what is believed about it. The great news is that you are the untouchable canvass that provides the space for it to happen. Nothing has ever happened to you, that is the misunderstanding that I struggled with. The self thought thinks that reality is happening to it, but that thought is just another thing happening. Self loves to be a victim because it hides the truth. All of these thoughts, and every other sensation is constantly changing and morphing, but there is one things that is always constant. Just do your best to abide in what is always present, and has never been touched by anything arising. For me, it was all about dis-identifying with thoughts by watching them and recognizing that I had no control over them, and they couldn't be what I am. For me, the moment I truly saw that thoughts are not in my control, and that the feeling that I am controlling them was a farce, It all began to fade. There was a short time of depression, but then I realized that if this was the case, it had always been this way, and so there was nothing to be upset about. Really watch and be attentive to thoughts and decisions. Every answer you need is contained in those experiences. A lot of enlightenment stuff is said to be mystical and amazing, but the thing is that this can be a huge distraction. The base of it from this perspective is simply watching and being attentive to thought processes, and then it falls into place. Just keep working at it, and don't let thoughts scare you off. Some may not agree, but I can only speak from my experience, and the labyrinth of mind is often contradictory. Stick with it.

The thing with humans is, most of the time it depends on the energy that you have with it as to how they will respond. If there's any validation seeking (which be aware, with family members should actually be quite common), there is a higher chance they will blow it off. Show in behavior would be the best by far (let them ask why you are so peaceful). Second, maybe question them if they think they are their thoughts and body and why? And casually present a few good arguments as to why that's maybe not so: the body changes, thoughts change, awareness seems impersonal and so universal and just see what that does

Day 5: I just had two profoundly different experiences with the University I used to attend. The first experience was with a program called career connect. Woke up early no traffic heading to the Valley and finding parking easily then being driven to the place we were going to have the orientation. My favorite part of the whole thing wasn't exactly the orientation but, it was the ride there. Being in the shuttle going down the freeway and while others were talking to people I mostly sat there silent staring out the window and looking up at the clouds. It reminded me of simpler times when my parents would drive me places and I'd sit in the car just not saying anything and just staring out the window. Those were some of the fondest memories I'd had of my youth. The best of the best was looking out a planes window and just admiring a birds eye view. So as I sat there we arrived at our destination got to say hi to all the people working there and got to know the inner workings of the cruise line they worked for. I also had a really friendly chat with a person who worked there and we kind of got to know each other. I had no problem speaking and socializing. I shared with him stories about my travels and it related to the industry to since it was cruise ships and that's about hospitality. Then on the shuttle ride back I felt the same way just looking out the window and enjoying that view. Today on the other hand the experience wasn't exactly that great. I went to an alumni reunion and actually the first person I talked to was a really nice lady who I had a class with and I enjoyed that class because I got to express myself. The problem was though is that I dislike these socially awkward situations. That's how the whole thing felt like though one big socially awkward situation. In situations like that I kind of retreat into my own thoughts especially when there are people there that I hardly know. It had some good moments but, not exactly that many. I had expectations for the event but, all and all I came out of it disappointed. It was a story of other people although I wanted people to know my story and my story was that I didn't exactly have a kinship with academia or my University to begin with. So many people feel as though they have some kind of relationship with the place they graduated from. As for me I just felt kind of a sense of nothingness. I wasn't raised in the typical growing up way I just wanted to get out of anything that had to do with school ASAP and find some work. Unfortunately for me my upbringing didn't make me the most social person or the most successful because of how turbulent it was. This experience really fell flat because I figured I went through this horrendous traffic to get there, paid for the parking, and looked forward to it. At last when I finally got there just to feel socially awkward and weird in front of people who I kind of barely knew. I think to myself sometimes that I was so responsible as a young person. I may have not had the best social skills, I didn't exactly make that many friend, and I may have not gone the extra mile that many times in my life ON THE OTHER HAND I was responsible. I did what I was told when I was younger. I finished my assignments, I came early and on time to classes, I got my work finished on time and sometimes even ahead of schedule. I was also well behaved and didn't start any trouble. That's why I have such a personal struggle and a very deep vomit inducing disgust with the adult world or as some people like to call it the "real" world. This world consists of things called jobs and this is when it gets real ugly. Most of these "jobs" that you will be accepted in when you're old enough to have one will be things that don't feed your passion and make you feel like an automaton. The other thing is nothing is more subjective than "getting a job" you're just a piece of paper either an "application" a "resume" or a "resume with a cover letter". I think it's so impersonal and dehumanizing. No where on those papers does it show your personality, the struggles you went through, the kind of life you had, and the passion and potential you poses. Nope your life is reduced to a piece of paper that is no longer than a page. The human element is completely missing from the equation as well when all the jobs need to be applied to online and you can't just walk in and talk to someone. Anyway I used to write stuff like this in a private journal. I think though that hopefully the majority of people on this website are cognitively complex enough to appreciate my musing and philosophies on life. Although I on the other hand need to understand one thing and it was actually good that I took that UCLA trail for the Peers program about making friends. I remember when I told the counselor that I had a long winded conversation with someone about philosophy and life but, then she told me that gets boring and it's unsustainable. She told me that friends are made by talking about common interests and my interests are video games, science, technology, chemistry, politics, geography, and travelling. That's a good piece of advice when I go too far down the rabbit hole with these philosophical excursions with others and in my writing. I'm more than happy for the entire world to be exposed to my writings and philosophies and to contemplate them once in a while. I think that's what the world needs more of what do you think @Anna Konstantaki?

@Yen277 Assuming you're a guy then you can expect some level of distance from everyone, even your closest friends. It is healthy to keep some part of yourself to yourself that nobody else sees or affects. It provides internal security and creates and air of mystery that is attractive. Also keep in mind that men are naturally action prone and tend to form alliances/friendships with other men who have similar interests and partake in the same activities. This gives you common ground on which to walk conversationally, keeping the topic of conversation impersonal and directed towards some practical end. Think of some of the best conversations you have had with other guys. They were probably about some shared hobby you both enjoyed. Which is why as you grow and your interests change your friendships will also change. Simply keep an eye out for others in the spaces you are entering and see if you can find something that you admire about them. You will find some common ground in there.

Try writing down(honestly) what you think is the cause of your blockages. Be impersonal in your writing. Write out your thoughts and look at them. Try to locate the fear. Observe your reaction to whatever you're writing. Follow the reactions. If they're fear-based, and most likely they are, go in them and dig deeper. Works wonders, but you gotta stick to it and be observing yourself.

Entry 100 | Reflection PHWOAR! What a beautiful number that is! So as of today, I will have consciously marked 100 days of my life. And let me add that it feels like no time at all. But simultaneously, it was so long ago since I started that I can no longer remember a time when I wasn't journaling. I'm going to have a day of two after this entry to read back all of my journal entries to myself. That was going to be my plan for today, but there are some special things I want to talk about before I forget. First of all, I followed the advice of the performance coach and visualised myself on the day of my big recital in May. Fortunately, my imagination is very vivid so I was able to feel the nerves and the anxiety filling my body in the present moment. Starting from the moment I woke up, I continued to visualise the whole day leading up to the performance. When it came to visualising the performance, I paid close attention to detail. I visualised the venue, the audience, the examiners, my band mates, my stage layout, the lighting, and, most importantly, my performance ability. Although I was nervous to some extent, it was so comfortable and effortless that I even caught myself bopping along with the music outside of my visualisation! Every note that I played was utter perfection in terms of giving it my all. After the visualisation, I became filled with so much joy as I realised that this could become a reality. A few moments later, I started a new visualisation. In this, I chatted to my future self having just performed the recital. He was beaming with energy and almost crying with happiness. I asked him how it went and he replied "That went exactly how I wanted it to go." He advised that he was "so grateful to have done that visualisation every single day leading up to the exam" but warned that he could only become a reality if I listened to his advice. For those of you thinking I have a dual personality disorder of some kind, rest assured that my creative imagination has become so developed that it takes on a life of its own. This would later prove to be the case as I was hit with divine inspiration to write some song lyrics, of all things. For years, I've wanted to write song lyrics. And now when I least expected it, inspiration struck! I stayed with the energy of the creative Muse and began to write down the lyrics to the song, which is currently 4 stanzas long. Then later on, after having recorded my first live music video on Facebook, I tuned into the creative Muse once again to figure out the accompanying guitar part to the song. As I played through the song for an hour or two, it felt so obvious that these lyrics were passing through me, not being created by me. Not often have I experienced this as it's happening. The song seems to be about the loss of a loved one. In particular, the image of my mother appeared to me several times in the practice room. But my mum is neither dying nor ill. These words are so impersonal to my own life. And yet, I can see how one day, they are going to be incredibly personal to me when the fateful day comes that my mum will die. Hopefully, there's plenty of life left in her for a lot of years. I love her very much. So those were some magic moments of my day! Now to reflect on the last 100 journal entries from memory. This journal has been one of the most fun aspects of personal development that I have come across. I've tried journaling in the past in actual books but there's something so nice about this platform that motivates me to keep going. The digital interface is nice enough for sure. But the best thing has to be the 'community' aspect of it. I've been able to reach out to like-minded people and learn about them and their way of life. Some of you have contacted me with messages of support and encouragement for my work on this journal so far. To those people, thank you very much for reaching out to me. Without knowing it, you've influenced my willpower to keep going along this journey for myself and for the benefits I will eventually bring to others. This journey of personal development has given me something wonderful: I have developed the capacity to feel unconditional love for everyone and everything. This is something very new. There were certain people in my life that I felt it necessary to avoid and hate. But that has completely transformed into its opposite. Thanks to this journal, I have been able to get my important thoughts into writing. I've had some wonderful moments of realisation at my laptop. And to top it all, I'm an absolute boss at the Dvorak keyboard now! To those of you who read this journal regularly, I will take this opportunity to thank you for taking an interest in my story. You guys certainly haven't gone unnoticed! Although this journal has never been about accumulating views, it has been heartwarming to watch that number rise each day. It validates the very reason that keeps me going: I must be doing something good! If you are a regular reader, do message me and share your stories too. I have a desire to connect with more and more people in a deep, meaningful way. None of that shallow, modern small-talk! I will return to this journal either when I have read all of my previous entries or when something noteworthy happens in my life. Until then, love you all! Pick of the day:

Well, if I look from the non-dual perspective that all is one, then relationship has to be a relationship between the one and itself at the ultimate level. So, relationships between two people are illusory, just as (presumably) all happenings within existence are illusory including the illusion of self. But perhaps the illusion exists for a reason (if the one even traffics in reason, at all). So, the potential reasons for relationship that come up in my limited human mind are 1. The one wants to know what it is like to relate to another despite it being the only one, as the one must know everything by its very nature (assuming that God is omniscient as religions have told us), and how could the one know everything if it doesn't know duality and relationship. 2. The one wants to know what it is like to know conditional love due to the fact that its nature is unconditional love. 3. The one wants to know what it is like to know imperfection due to the fact that it's nature is perfection. So, relationship gives the one the experience of separateness, otherness, imperfection, conditional love, differences, conflict, pain in opposition to the state of unconditional love and infinite well-being that is the state of entropy that our attachments keep us from falling toward. So, relationship often creates and solidifies the emotional attachment needed to stay out of the state of unconditional love and Truth that is the original state, so that the one may stay in a state of illusion to know more how it is like to be other than what it is. Full enlightenment might potentially nullify the reasons that the one wanted to experience the human perspective in the first place. Maybe enlightenment is ultimately foolish, despite that it is more expansive and is qualitatively better from the human emotional standpoint. You only have maybe 80 years to be this particular human with all its imperfections, while you have an eternity to be the one. Why do you have to be the one now and nullify all the beautiful illusions and the beautiful terrible suffering that stems from it? That is, other than the fact that you are indeed God and can do whatever the heck you want to regardless of whether or not it seems to make no sense. It's not as though there are any rules to the game that you didn't yourself create. But from the dualistic standpoint, relationship is two or more different people, places, things, or ideas that share something in common or have some form of dependence on one another. So, we could say that practically, this is what human relationships are as well. Human beings naturally and instinctually tend to create relationships with the exception of some understanding, idea, or goal that prevents a person from engaging in them. Even enlightened human beings create relationships, which is not necessary for the purpose of "getting love" as enlightenment is the realization that all is one and all is love. There is no sense of filling some place that lacks "love". Real love by its very nature is impersonal, unconditional, and non-directional. So, it has nothing to do with the emotions felt in a relationship on the dualistic level. But on the non-dual level, it is the very substance of the one and of all of existence. And the relationship is another creation of this one that is love. So, relationship as most people know it is not love, but all is love. So, relationship is also love. With this in mind, it seems that most enlightened people tend to still create relationships romantic and otherwise. Perhaps, because enlightenment is a state of non-resistance there is no reason to resist the natural urges to form bonds with others or natural urges in general. It doesn't matter in the end as it's all an illusion, but that's no reason to forego these instincts or resist them... but simply to be detached from them and see them for what they truly are. In the same way that there's no reason to forego practical things such as work. "Before enlightenment, chop wood and carry water. After enlightenment, chop wood and carry water." And at that ultimate level, relationship is truly an expression of love just as everything else is an expression of love. But it's not int he particularity of the relationshipees or in the emotions shared by the two. But it is the very substance of all things involved in the existence. It's the very dance that reality does to create the illusion of relationship that the reality and love can be found. To be continued...

This mind-body-spirit complex has had an intuition about the ego. An analogy is best used to explain what is meant. Envision an onion with many protective layers. This is you. When you are around certain people like your parents, boss, girlfriend or random stranger layers might be added. This is either to protect you from saying something you shouldnt or prevent emotional pain in other selves. Can you see a self perpetuating cycle here? It is even built into the language that this mind-body-spirit complex is using to communicate with you. Once the desire to seek for truth and reunion with intelligent infinity what is referred to as the ego can be encountered and many properties are assigned to it. However the important thing based on this mind-body-spirit complexes experience with the ego is the following: There are many layers to an onion. If you have had any experience with real onions you might know that even if the outer layers are rotten the core remains fresh. These rotten layers might be the cause for the negative properties that you have assigned to the ego. The ego can be seen as the guardian of your onion which you refer to as "you". When layers are peeled away a backlash from the ego may be experienced. This is very common for the techniques and paths that have been devised to get to a non egoic experience of consciousness. This backlash can be very severe and this mind-body-spirit complex has had some experiences with this. In later stages, experiences that you might refer to as panic attacks or existential terror can be experienced. Whenever a strong backlash is experienced there might be a very strong urge to relieve the pain. This might be through sex, masturbation, food cravings, tv, videos or anything that can act as a distraction. In a sense what you refer to as ego is trying to grasp at anything to make it stay. It might do anything to convince you to hold on to your egoic onion. However once you have let go fully "you" can experience a completely impersonal experience of reality. This mind-body-spirit complex has had success with using the Wim Hof breathing technique to help relax at times of panic attacks. Any breathing techniques, referred to as pranayama in Hinduism might be useful. Meditation is useful to cultivate self control in the prefrontal cortex and provide some insight into the workings of the mind. Entheogens help to temporarily remove several layers of the onion. However too high doses might lead to panic attacks which this mind-body-spirit complex has experienced. These are some things that have helped this mind-body-spirit complex to accelerate it's growth: Open mindedness, self control, honesty (mainly with yourself), a practical approach (if it doesn't help discard it), the ability to let things)emotions/concepts/thoughts go (if it doesn't help you throw it away), acceptance of what is, acceptance of feelings, acceptance of other selves state of development...

Don't settle for less than what you really desire. Because even if it will give you some short physical pleasure, you will have a long mental hangover, if you will go against yourself or compromise with yourself just to get laid....at any cost..... And don't listen to the advice that you have to improve some traits, etc. All you have to do is just be your REAL YOU as close as possible. And this quite often means UNLEARNING the things that contributed to the current fake version of you. If you are looking for serious relationships then do the things what you really like, enjoy life, and the girl will show up... But if you meantime, want to have active and high quality sex life, then I would like to give you additional advice. Nowadays, one of the biggest mistake of many men is that they are so horny and dumb, that they immediately show the sexual interest to the girls......and that is a really huge mistake even in places where people openly search for sexual partners........remember, there is no girl who wants to have sex with horny idiot............. if you really want to succeed in relationships with women, at first you have to show them that you have at least a little bit of intellect and that you respect women.......and that your brain, not dick, is in charge of what you speak or write........and ONLY WHEN you after a few minutes/hours/days/weeks/months (it depends on each girl, situation, etc) will notice that you GOT HER INTELLECTUALLY......many high quality doors (legs) will start to open up for you........and this is the moment when you can finally start to let loose your dick.........you can start to speak and write with it ........ and even most educated, self-confident and intellectually developed women will gladly to communicate with your dick........and enjoy all the other actions it can provide........because this is not just another impersonal intrusive dick..........this dick is special and chosen one........

Outlook 1 seems neurotic, wanting something fast, is never a good sign. Outlook 2 imply there is a purpose to life, which can't be proved, and most enlightened people just say there is no point to it, or that it is just there to be experienced. The ego can't be a foe, existence is impersonal, it has no enemy, since it is only one being. If you fight your ego, it is the ego that is mad about itself, which reinforce it.

@Phil This is exactly the kind of mind trick that I'm talking about. Don't you see how ego likes to think of itself as being special? "Enriched sensations and emotions?" Sure! Just what the ego wants. "Reconnection to Oneness? Damn! What an awesome and developed ego I am! I transcended all illusion, am I not the most special ego that there is? I'm soooo superior, I tasted TRUE HAPPINESS, TRUE BEING!" Feels good and warm, doesn't it? REAL reconnection to Oneness means dropping EVERYTHING! And what I'm claiming here is that transcendence of ego is not possible for the ego, just like having senses is an impossibility for a chair -- it simply doesn't have the necessary tools to do that, it is just a partition of something WAY bigger. Even in theory, in the exact moment when transcendence would occur the ego would cease to exist, along side with all thoughts and senses and feelings and so forth. You're saying that transcendence would bring along all those incredible enhanced feelings, but that's just not the case -- notice how good it feels to think that that's the case, that's ego right there! just as there's ego in trying to communicate this insight with you. Because oneness is impersonal, selfless, senseless, thoughtless. And as for ego death through stopping thoughts / focus, meditation shows that the stream of thoughts is a never-ending process as long as you're alive and conscious. I know this got pretty ranty, but I feel like that's the best way to communicate this perspective. I'm genuinely interested in discovering the truth (or something as close to truth as possible) about this issue of transcendence and so far this perspective seems the most accurate to me.

The more "Person" you let go, the more empty you will know. Let the light of yourself bleed away the suffering of time. There is a infinite field that doesn't talk, you can only hear when your mind is quiet. The impersonal is one with all personal. The observer is the observed, the thinker is the thought, life knows only itself. Impersonal awareness, is all inclusive. There is a deep affinity with nature to rekindle, that can only be found again when you look intensely. Last quote by rumi "Out beyond all ideas of wrong doing and right doing there is a field I'll meet you there"

Hi all, Sorry to resurrect and old post but similarity to the original posters comment I am having some difficulty understanding this too and would appreciate some clarification if possible. I believe I understand what enlightenment is to the best of my ability without having experienced it, and if everything in my unconscious reality is untrue, how can we have a life purpose? It seems to me that the only way to be truly happy and content would be to wake up and realise enlightenment. So what reason is there to chase some imaginary life goal? For example, if I felt my life purpose was to be a Doctor, Self Help Guru or Vet, I would work towards this and once it was achieved, I would still feel like my life was missing something? Is the point not that we do not need anything external to be happy, we just need to be in the present moment? I appreciate that getting to the stage of enlightenment can take many years if it even happens at all, but if you are in a stable career that may not be your passion as such, what is the reason to chase something else when in fact it is only an illusion of self tied to your ego. This could be some basic misunderstanding on my part, and I hope it makes sense and is clear. If someone is able to help me it would really be appreciated. Quotes taken from @Leo Gurafirst spiritual enlightenment video that I am using to help base my understanding as well as numerous books by people such as Tolle etc. “There’s nothing personal about life, which means that everything that you take personally about your life is an illusion. In fact, life is completely neutral and completely impersonal. Even your very body is impersonal. Even your thoughts, your very thoughts about you, are impersonal. The other thing spiritual enlightenment means is that all thoughts and all beliefs, no matter whether they’re religious, spiritual, scientific or everyday beliefs, are all just stories. They’re not reality and they’re not truth-telling. They are just stories.” They are stories about reality, but not reality itself. They don’t carry truth about reality, even though we believe that they do. Another aspect of spiritual enlightenment, which is really cool, is that because the you is an illusion and it doesn’t actually exist, mortality becomes irrelevant. Number two – The other reward you get is lasting happiness and peace of mind. You will have true happiness. What you have now is not true happiness. You are living in a living hell. With this truth, you can actually have true peace of mind, regardless of circumstance. This is a very cool thing. From the moment you were born and up to today, you have been living your life looking and chasing for happiness. You keep telling yourself that if you watch enough of my videos or if you do enough of the personal development work, you will find happiness. Well, I hate to break it to you but you never will. You never will. You can already sense it because you have been trying your whole life and it hasn’t been working, has it? Don’t lie. It hasn’t been working. No matter how many houses you get, girlfriends you get or marriages you get, you are not going to be truly happy. Why? It is not possible because the you is an illusion. This illusion needs to be perpetuated by constant motion. Constant motion creates suffering. If you want to fix this happiness thing and be peaceful, if you want to be peaceful independent of what is happening in life, no matter if you are rich or poor, if you have a girlfriend or not, if you are married or you’re not, you’re kids are doing good in school or they are not, you’re healthy or you’re sick, you need to be spiritually enlightened. It sounds too good to be true. Again, this is one of the awesome rewards of doing this work.”

Yeah I've experienced similar, you're not alone. In the "journey" to come don't fixate on the experience you had though. It's just another arising. You've not gone anywhere or done anything special. That's an interpretation of the situation. If the reality you are experiencing right now is infinite and impersonal then you can't go anywhere can you! This is fucking it. Just start to realise that all the time throughout your day.

@Scarecrow I tried it once, and found it too time consuming....and impersonal....that said...I did meet some people that I could have been friends with if they were perhaps less desperate...when we didn't connect in a romantic way, from my perspective, i'd genuinely offer friendship....it was usually met with "I already have enough friends I only want you as a girlfriend" type thing....my experience aside, I know some people that this online dating approach works well for...ask yourself the questions @ajasatya posed....and also why you are considering online, do you typically communicate best in writing? etc...personally I'd rather meet a stranger in person, on the phone, or even video rather than having to type something....with no tone of voice, inflection, expressions etc...I find there is too much misinterpretation with text...especially if you are looking to actually connect with someone, there is very little energy exchange online....I hope you meet someone rad....force yourself to be bold in person too! Love!