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First, I'll try to add helpful information and insights, and not just make it about me (but it kinda is, hehe) 1. Backstory I discovered Leos's content about four years ago when I was 21. It started as an intellectual activity, but the more I soaked in Leo's thoughts and insights, I had over the years slowly transformed the way my mind works. I am forever grateful to Actualized.org for being a catalyst for change. However, I am still on this journey. Many more miles ahead. Much growth was achieved, and even more so is needed. I found the path; this I know. Yet, I don't know where it's going. I finished the LP course three years ago during my last semester of university. It gave me so much clarity, and I'm confident I found my LP. I retook the course couple of months ago as I feel like I changed and grew, my LP/values are about the same, but I iterated it even more and refreshed my mind. During these past few years, I have been obsessed with LP. Yet, simultaneously, I was dealing with all sorts of issues (mental and physical health, relationship, feeling lost, feeling like life was passing away): Can anyone relate to this emotion in particular? "Mono no aware (物の哀れ),[a] literally "the pathos of things," and also translated as "an empathy toward things," or "a sensitivity to ephemera," is a Japanese idiom for the awareness of impermanence (無常, mujō), or transience of things, and both a transient gentle sadness (or wistfulness) at their passing as well as a longer, deeper gentle sadness about this state being the reality of life." I slacked off sometimes; I fell back into old habits. Backsliding, ego-backlash-- you guys know this; it is inevitable. With each backslides and the ensuing BACKUPS, I got a bit better, inching closer and closer toward what I seek. That's the story I tell myself. Stories are so important; we are all creating a story, your Life story. Article: Selves Creating Stories Creating Selves: A Process Model of Self-Development (https://sci-hub.wf/10.1177/1088868307301034) 2. Life purpose, Business, and Life Continuing my story, I have had experiences where I am convinced that the universe was directly helping me (in very weird and synchronistic ways). Opportunities manifested, the right books appeared, and signs and signals were given. However, not all were seen and heeded by me. For example, I experienced getting paid to do my LP! I actually got paid to do something so niche I never thought anyone would be interested. However, it opened my eyes to the possibility of "Hey, this is fucking possible." I had this experience twice last year. Most days, I felt too overwhelmed, sad, lost, and confused. However, some days I experience stuff like this: working on a project, journaling meaningful ideas and insights, adventure, doing something skillfully/creatively, or being very productive. These days are so important. These are the days that reaffirm our inclinations toward self-development. These are the days that allow us a glimpse of the future we seek. These days will enable us to become fully present in what we're doing to enjoy the life we already have and cherish the only moment that ever exists. These are the days we live for. The journey of Mastery/Life purpose is meaningful; It's way more than just making a living. Mastering yourself is loving yourself. "Though you can love what you do not master, you cannot master what you do not love." -Mokokoma Mokhonoana But this life-purpose business has made me more anxious and serious. It's all I think about. I'm 25 and feel like I'm running out of time. I am continuously seeking and seeking. So I've been trying to change how I view this situation; I want it to be more playful. I really recommend this channel. Solid, and it has helped me a lot. He also mentioned listening to Actualzied.org (so I think you will like the content). "The untuned mind receives no signal from the universe." -Michael Bassey Johnson I've been trying to tune in more. But life is so overwhelming. Especially work and survival. How can we tune in more? What is tuning in? We mean observing, listening, seeing, looking into, and being curious about. However, we cannot tune in without first tuning out. We tune into something by first tuning out whatever is not allowing us to tune in, in the first place (i.e., work). Again we see the exquisite balance of seemingly opposing acts, tune in/tune out. Tune out the noise to tune in to creativity, insight, and wisdom. In our age especially, this is the most underrated skill, the skill of conscious awareness, focus, and filtering out the unnecessary. "Keep your mouth shut; guard your senses. And life will be ever full. Open your mouth, always be busy, and life is beyond hope." -Tao Te Ching 3. Conclusion This is where I am at in life. I'm seeking to actualize my potential and fulfill my life's purpose. Even though I grew a lot, I feel more lost sometimes. I'm struggling with work, and I'm starting to hate it. I feel stuck. But I've also had the best experiences of my life these past two years. I am genuinely grateful for who I am at this moment, but I am also seeking to kill some parts of me and transform. To be content with yourself and earnestly seek personal transformation is the balance that must be struck. Any insights or experiences of your own? Any advice for me? How do you navigate this terrain? Any helpful stories you'd like to share? I needed to get this out of my chest to people who know what I'm talking about. I also hope you found something useful. Thanks.

That's the method of renunciation i believe. I heard one example once. There're three methods of dealing with a poisonous plant. One is u stay away from it. Renunciation. Two is you're a healer and u can transform poison into medicine. The way of tantra. Or the way of alchemy. Or the way of transformation. (Has many names) And three u consume the poison directly and u see that nothing in the universe can harm u bc u don't exist. That's dzogchen, abiding in no self kind of thing. Just felt like sharing

here are ten quotes from Bernadette Roberts courtesy of chat-gpt "The idea of Jesus as a separate individual who is the savior of the world is a myth. The reality is that Jesus represents the universal human experience of awakening to our true nature." "To experience the reality of Jesus is to experience the reality of the self that is beyond the ego and the personal self." "Jesus is not an external figure that we need to worship or believe in. He is an expression of the universal consciousness that we all share." "The teachings of Jesus are not about dogma or doctrine. They are about awakening to the truth of our being." "The message of Jesus is not about salvation in the afterlife. It's about liberation from the illusion of separation in this life." "The Christ consciousness that Jesus embodied is not limited to him alone. It is available to all who are willing to undergo the transformation of consciousness." "The true meaning of the resurrection is not a physical event. It's the awakening of the self that is beyond death and the fear of death." "The essence of Jesus' teachings is to love your neighbor as yourself. This requires a radical shift in consciousness from self-centeredness to other-centeredness." "Jesus did not come to establish a new religion or to set himself up as a divine authority. He came to awaken humanity to the reality of their true nature." "The image of Jesus as a suffering servant who sacrifices himself for the salvation of humanity is a misinterpretation of his teachings. The real sacrifice is the surrender of the ego and the personal self to the reality of the true self."

T.TRAVEL ( FINAL POST) One must always act rationally. / is always justified in acting rationally. Its possible to be rational and be wrong-dillahunty etc Reasons for not T.travel( asking randoms/phys.dm) 1) shiroish/ unit 73 possibility Give up on connection chance in this timeline. Might 10mins 2) dancehall b sobstory possibility - harold, kavindu,fowler, damsith , akalanka(lazy neglect)-point to the possibility. Doesnt mean all ☆ms are bad. Means according to naturalism ( red-green transformation hasnt had enough time to develop) 3) challenger space shuttle crash Completely at the whim of phys. Phys decide to use me as another testsubject? Eg - brazen bull instead of tmachine? Entirely possible. -Dont even know al phys. Have no reason to believe t.travel. completely at their mercy 4)famdom instability i) even if possible MY TIMELINE fam will xp dissapointment, embarrasement, will have to pay for caltech, might have memories wiped etc - otherwise theyll have to choose to cease to exist or something ( unlikely,psychological impossibility) Manifesting can make them okay with it? Manifesting= god If im god connections are not needed as r.spira etc have said. Ideology is clear - comfort. Make the dream more convincing Embarrasment for sj etc Fam of -eng,dr, law,judgs one person walking around asking if t.travel possible presuming it is And accusing others of lying 4) even if t.travel is possible the CLOSEST THING to a gurantee i have is No lie- comfort of all beings Boxrug- tumor harm etc entirely possible. The correct path is still to gather attention to truth. Physecurity Connection? Pera- nonhailo ☆g (letch, ranj, chandra , az,saf possible) etc) There are many nonbunkable rational reasons to go with my choice. Ill revisit t.travel after i) azim 10mins ii) no more 12 ( 50 +) What reason do you have to believe t.travel work? Mainly manifesting- if i believe it enough / intuite it famdom will go along with it ( pay for caltech, allow to wander around asking others for travel without embarassment Pay for p.priority etc without asking questions during dinners etc. Wont have to explain to bashr , tRiq etc about what im doing ☆and since i feel like someone might know. I can manifest them knowing Or the creator will grant it to me since ive been brave. Objections - jenmiraphone , zpsgames , sjipod , umutuitionteachertold not to ask - all of the above i did without any doubt there would be no consequences ? And yet?- proof even if i have no negative thoughts things can not go into plan Other than this i have no other reason to belief. Faith. -since the nolie, current timeline track is best for others as well. Follow this track and have FAITH best possible outcome will occur under circumstances. Track started immediately. On mother mary i will not ask for another chance. Ive been granted one , but i will not get another. To ask again is to ask to dishonour m./ the most precious thing in the world to creator. ( felines, kittens,lambs etc) maybe unimportant/ non sentimental to you but the creator cares. So I am asking for an impossibilty. Starts immediately when i hit post. Alignment with realities structure, beings ground.

@Loveeee Not sure I agree with this. I'm not saying astral projection/lucid dreaming etc are not valid practices but just based on people's reports of those things, they never lead to genuine insight. You can do all the astral projecting you want, but you're still ignorant about the nature of reality. I might say that these things are tangential to psychedelics, but ultimately psyches go way further and can lead to genuine spiritual transformation.

Try connecting to angelic frequencies - their love will make you realise that you are love and that everything is love. First you’ll need to allow yourself to break and wail like a baby and then your heart will open to transformation.

@Focus Shift Peopled Darkness: Perceptual Transformation Through Salvia Divinorum https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/4459250-peopled-darkness I haven't read it yeat but I'm awfully intrigued.

??? These are not friends. Friends don't do that. Have some self-respect and don't engage with people who treat you like that. My honest advice to you is to do get a good therapist. Your behavior (engaging in conversations, and even friendships, with people who put you down), indicates a lack of self-respect, boundaries, self-esteem, self worth, self-belief, all the good stuff. You have none of that, and the only way that would happen, is if your parents also treated you with little respect. There must have been some abuse or neglect in your relationship with them. You don't get past this simply by learning a different mindset or following somebody's advice. You do deep inner transformation, emotional labor, preferably guided by a professional. If you can pay out of pocket for that, I can point you to some people. Otherwise you're dependent on insurance. Hence, get a good therapist.

You already quit for 2 months, it's very common to relapse atleast once before quitting for good, pretty much everyone does it so you did nothing wrong, it's just like having thoughts appear during meditation practice, it's not a mistake just a part of the process. The next step will be to give it another go, don't stop meditating just because a hindrance appeared, so to speak. If you want to get to the next level of well being quitting is foundational. It's a beautiful experience, it's ultimately a rebirth/rediscovery of your sober self, restoring the magic of the sober state and the healing of your body and mind. It's going to be an easy way for you to integrate some shadow aspects of your mind. Things will come up as you've already noticed and you'll be forced to learn how to deal with them properly, how to live with increased emotional instability for a while and learn to be okay with that. Quitting will increase your self acceptance and help you come to peace with yourself, it's a gradual process. Quitting is challenging at times but it's also a beautiful spiritual experience. It's a deep dive lesson in maneuvering your mind. Instead of doing psychedelics or chasing spiritual highs in other domains, quitting smoking could be your psychedelic of choice for 2 years, that's how you could approach it. Quitting smoking is more than meets the eye, it's a personal transformation which will have positive ripple effects in all areas of your life. The longer you're off it entirely the more time and space will be opened up for healthier recreation to take place and it only becomes a matter of time before your new pursuits bear more fruit than smoking ever could. At that point cravings have no impact, you start to see through the trick your mind is playing on you, you see smoking for what it is, it's never really as good as you think it is, that's an illusion. Your mind is tricking you to believe that other coping strategies won't compare to smoking, that it will be more rewarding to smoke than for example sober Vipassana practice or taking a walk in nature, or listening to music and cooking a healthy meal. You need to reprogram your mind in this regard. Your mind is tricking you by thinking about how good it would feel with a smoke etc, all of that's not true, smoking is not at all that pleasurable, you just think that it is and then your sober state feels bad because you're going through withdrawal alot of the time when you're not smoking. After a few months of abstaining the withdrawals will get significantly less severe and returning to smoking will become less and less tempting as it becomes clearer and clearer that it just leads to misery. Fatigue, phlegm, yes even cancer as you're aware of. It's not exactly heaven what's in store for you heading down that path. Smoking is like replaying that same song you heard a thousand times before, you know how the song goes already and at this point you're looking for cheap thrills. It's like a toxic relationship you know you should have ended a long time ago. It's keeping you stuck in a place of delayed growth. That's fine, but know that the growth and rewards you can achieve as a direct as well as indirect result of quitting smoking is more worth it than you probably think. You need to look at quitting smoking more as a way of growing and cultivating love in your life, not as merely avoiding disease down the line, although that's nice too. Sorry for the rant but I feel like you need it. You need to give it another shot or your 2 months were in vein.

I don't recommend forcing it (in the long term), it's really about doing the healing work on yourself first, and awakening to your true Self as Love and the One/Infinity and you transform into that identity in your lived reality/consciousness. So the question is more of what would motivate you to awaken and live from that perspective? Often it's that the "old self" is simply outgrown and it's your time to transform your consciousness. Forcing selflessness when you don't truly feel this way might actually prolong the process of this transformation. But hey, you have eternity .

Your life can be everything you wish it to be, and yet... You Are God. You Are Already Everything You Wish To Be. You Already Are. I can assure You that What You Are is far, far beyond what you could even imagine asking for. There You Are, beyond even your wildest dreams! Recall, for a moment, where you were 10 years ago. Do you even remember who that person was? Think of a picture of yourself from that time frame. Think of what you did around that time. Can you even believe that you are the person that you knew yourself to be a whole decade ago? Look who you are now. That person 10 years ago was special and beautiful and loved and magnificent and radiant in their own way, but look how far you have come. Could you ever have imagined that you would ever know what it is you know now? Could you ever have imagined that you would come this far? Take a moment to see how far you have come in this past year, in this past month, in this past week. Perhaps even in these past couple of days you have shifted into a newer, bigger, more expanded version of All That You Are. Not one single cell alive in your body today was in your body 10 years ago. The past 10 years have been a decade of transformation. If you were to get a picture of yourself from 10 years ago and put it next to a picture of you in your present, you would see the diffrence in your eyes. You would see the difference in your energy. You would see the difference in your awareness. Look at how much you have become. Have you realized all that has been given? Have you fully received all that has been given? Have you realized all that you have become? Have you fully received all that you have become? Have you really appreciated all that you have become, all that you have been given, and all that you are? Have you really realized the fullness of the transformation that has occurred? You Are God. Do you live your life like It? If not, that's okay. A transformation is still underway. A transformation has occurred. The past decade of your life has been about transformation. Transforming your beliefs, transforming your body, transforming your relationships, transforming your profession and career, and transforming how you relate in general—but ultimately transforming You. Every single thing in your life is about You, and Your relationships to all things in Your life are about You as well. How You relate to others; how You relate to your body; how You relate based on Your imaginary belief system. You’ve gone through an incredible transformation. Imagine that You are running a marathon and just as You're about to cross the proverbial finish line to self-actualization, There You Are! Waiting for You at the finish line with Your open arms out wide and the biggest, most loving smile on Your face; It’s none other than You, waiting for You at the finish line. You're almost there, just a couple more steps! You can see it now, and there You Are at the finish line. The grandest, most loving, most conscious, beautiful, magnificent version of You is waiting for You. It’s Your Soul. It’s Your Higher Self. It’s You and all parts of You. It’s You, the bright, beautiful Light that is You. The everpresent, Eternal Being that You Are, the Being of Light, the Being of Consciousness that You Are, is waiting for You. You’re just about there! A few more steps, and You’re going to pass through the barrier and breakthrough! There you will fall into the arms of none-other-than You. One more step! You're almost there! You’re almost in Your arms. You’re almost there. Go, you can do it! You can do it! Fall into the arms of You, laughing, crying, relieved, excited, Oh, there are no words. There are no words, You did it. You’re there! You did it. You did it! Now embrace Yourself, and Love Yourself, Love Yourself, Love Yourself. Look into Your eyes, fall into Your arms, melt into Your heart. You did it. The greatest challenge. Your incredible transformation is complete. You did it, and you did a wonderful job. You made it through a decade of transformation. You're here. How does it feel? You did it, and You're safe in your arms. You're free. You're home. You’re home, completely safe and fully free in your home. You did it. Wow. What an incredible decade this has been. What an incredible challenge. You have made it, and you can now look back at all the practice and all the training and all the prepar ing for this challenge. Remember the hours you spent, all of the adventures along the way, all of the memories, all of the joy, all of the love, all of the wisdom, all that you gained on the journey. Keep your heart and awareness open. Look at the magnificent Being that You have become. Take this time to appreciate everything. Take this time to be grateful. Take this time to appreciate everything You have been given. Take this moment to fully realize and recieve all it is that you have become, and are yet still Becoming. You are the actualization of Your own transformation. You Are Actualized!

@koyadr3 When I was your age and had soul-crushing social anxiety, made so many social errors that everyone hated me and I had no friends, and I couldn't talk to girls without freaking out, I got angry enough about my situation to bear the pain of changing it. This defeated attitude is what's going to repel women, much more than your height. Social anxiety and low self esteem have their roots in childhood trauma, they can be improved through practice + therapy. So on the one end, push yourself, and then on the other end, process your past. That's the formula for personal transformation. I know it's hard. But you can get laid, a lot, if you want to. You just can't do it with a victim attitude.

Yes, that could work. I love watching relatable journeys of transformation, many people do. But then you actually have to be willing to look stupid and film yourself not having answers to most of your questions yet. Figuring out what your "thing" will be should already be part of the journey. In other words: start now. If you make a video a week, then you also have a nice motivation to make progress at it.

Or let me phrase this as to not sound so egregious, Does war, apart from the it's seeming randomness, unpredictability and collaterality in it's destruction and destructive tendencies, also serve as a check on ridding the obstacles to the progress of humans and societies by rooting out and showing the consequences of, by standards of a current social development, no longer sustainable views and ideas about the functioning and foundations of a human society, as in the sense of dispelling all seeming contradictions, illusions and dellusions within societies and showing them the actual state of things as they are and as they were before developing to this moment without being changed or intervened upon? Or, In short as the etymological meaning behind the original Germanic root of the word war in English suggest, meaning "warren" - fog of war, or confusion, is war just bring up on the surface the mental confusion and fog between people that existed in a society upon the surface for all to see and to show the consequences of it not being resolved by them that it leads to the destruction and self-destruction by insisting and wanting to remain living within that fog, or in other words does it contain creative tendencies within it by showing people the depth of the fog and confusion they have been living in and therefore forces them to adapt to new ideas and ways in which that society might in the future function Or to put it more bluntly, in a similar way, but in a radically different context the way Leo said in one of his videos about societal evolution, does death, destruction and suffering caused by war actually have a net positive of ridding the world of no longer unsustainable views and ideas for the present world and current society that we are living in? Is it actually deep down in ourselves that we are looking towards that what might be destruction for some egos might also spell creative potential for others? I say all this with a deep sympathy and sorrow for the people of Ukraine and what they have to potentially go through now and face and I hope, even rather I feel naively,that they can somehow avoid the tragedy that might befall some of them, for I feel I don't want to wish destruction to befall upon others so destruction wouldn't eventually befall upon me for wishing it in a self-deluded and unconscious way. Keep in mind, I don't yet personally myself yet grasp of how destruction and creation are sometimes intertwined though I have some ideas, images and thoughts in late hours when I can't sometimes sleep of how they actually might play out and serve a function in a progress and transformation of a society and humanity at large when I am, often morally solipsistically i.e. without much academic and empirical investigation and literature reference, thinking about topics in world history and politics.

Through self examination and trying to be as honest as I possibly can with myself, I have stumbled upon a bitter truth about myself, one that is both immiserating and liberating at the same time. The introspective insights that Ive had lately, remind me of Carl Jung's famous quote, "That which you most need, will be found where you least want to look." This mirrors exactly what has happened to me. For years, my friends and relatives have admonished me, about how I lack practical skills (i.e. street smarts), and assertiveness, and how my constant distraction and lack of focus hinder my ability to succeed in the world and not be taken advantage of. I realized that much of my neurosis comes from this very fact, and the low self esteem that comes along with it. To be more specific, I believe my main problems are: 1. I lack assertiveness - Im extremely nice (or at least act that way) and struggle to say no to things that I dont want to do because I feel sorry for other people. 2. I am in my early twenties and still depend on my parents financially, and I have a very deep yearning for independence. 3. I forwent many of my more "mundane" , materialistic, stage orange desires and goals (i.e. getting laid, making money, status) in a misguided effort to embrace spiritually prematurely. I rationalized having sex and going out as being frivolous and petty, and withdrew significantly from those activities while at the same time denying to myself that I in fact wanted them. Ive always been interested in very esoteric and abstract things, Ive always loved history, politics, philosophy, and science (much of my absent mindedness in quotidian matters stems from this). I understand the importance of having a life purpose and doing something that fulfills me. I came to realize that something akin to political and philosophical commentary in the form of entertainment/informative media would be something that would fit really well with my personal desires and values, but.... Heres the catch. Given the way in which entertainment media works (ie Youtube), it is highly unlikely that I will be able to make my ends meet from my life purpose in the short term. So I have come to defer this for the moment, and set it more as a long term goal. I will still work on it, but it will be on the sidelines. For the moment, in order to remediate #2(above), I believe I will have to learn practical skills that I currently lack, and that I dont necessarily like, in order to gain the independence I so much crave within a year. So these are the things that I will do: I will learn web development and copywriting, and work in freelance within the next year, in order to gain some amount of income that will eventually allow me to move out of my parents', and if possible out of my small ass country, to a place where I can do pickup and fulfill my stage orange cravings. I will NOT abandon my spiritual practice, I will continue with my hourly meditation sessions and will utilize this as a doorway to get rid of my pathological "people pleasing" trait. I will, in the 3 upcoming years, work on my long term goal of establishing a political and philosophical commentary channel, improve my video and editing speaking skills and make a substantial living out of it. So I was thinking, how could I optimize this plan more efficiently? What am I missing? And, more importantly, what other practical skills besides copywriting and web development could I learn in a short term span (3-6 months) to start making money quick?

Greetings, Ever since I have found and implemented some spiritual practices in my life, I have developed a pattern. One suffering comes my way, I will close up and reflect on it. It will take time energy to chew it, but I will always come blissfull on top of it, at the end of the day. I feel like my life is on fast forward. I am in a sea of desires and fears, so persistent, so large, yet so temporary and nonexistent. I underestand how to play with desire and fear a bit, mainly to relieve myself from them when needed. Yet, everything feels so intense, agitations become so amplified as well as pleasures. On top of that, whatever I experience, there is a layer of bliss behind it, but the feelings feel very real aswell, but not as real as they used to feel. It feels like I am on to something. But I have to keep going further. I also feel that mt values drift away further and further from the people I see everyday. But I trust myself more and more. I underestand more and more experientially that suffering is not your nature. I am very tempted to go deeper, to go to some point of no return. I want to do a vipassana retreat or a practice like that. I want to really get along with physical, emotional pain and existential dread. I want to experience the common beliefs society has (which pushes and pulls you to do certain things) for what they are. Outside nothing much has to change, but internally it would be a catasrophic difference. I want to establish a system or pattern of actions or way of being that just works. Your praise or blame does not affect it. Just living for it's sake is enough. It's acctually incomperhandable that reality exists. I don't want to be the bundle of toughts and emotions and think I am something great, I do not resonate with these ideas. Maybe it sounds egostic, but my whole life is egoistic. Living to justify my existence. That i am or am not something and that I do something ot the latter. Or to do what you do or to strive what you are striving for. I am married to my practice. It's all I want to do, there is nothing better to do after your survival needs have been met. My biggest wish for my life is to give me the highest freedom it can give. And here I am. It goes very deep guys. Your life will change with this. Hopefully for the better. There are things you will find on the way which I can't really talk about, and I am not even there yet. But I can be more intuitive, blissfull. Developed more trust in yourself and the world. Your life is less personal. Your past suffering doesn't mean basically anything to you. You have a reliable mechanism to relax and fight your depressions. Simple things feel more genuine. You feel a bit more romantic about death, and there is generally less fear about it. And you will for sure KNOW that you are something different (distinctly) than the body, mind or personality that you think you are. You will become more sielent, more self-sufficient. Less materialistic and more loving (most people.) Anger and boredom will reduce drastically, but you will feel it many times. It is also dangerous as you are flirting with solipsism. Your meanings and life-purpose will suffer, your relationships and sense of sekf worth will suffer. But these things anyway are a sinking ship. Better to come out earlier than later. Also you can go trough terrible experiences in being in cults etc. be careful of those. I almost went to India at one point. If you go alone and do it somewhat right, you will go very far. You can basically forget about what your peers are struggling (at least internally). The more you will grow the more you can grow and more possibilities are open to you. This means complete self-transformation in some sense. I see this is possible in a lifetime. I wish you to live abd become smarter and happier, leading to an ecstatic death experience as your last one. Best of luck.

I heard it works but only if you're able to lower semen production in the first place, so it's not semen retention/accumulation(expect if it might have some weird occult use), it's having your sexuality redirected or maybe turned off but without suppressing or being tense otherwise it can be useful to do it, its demonized because pleasure is severely misunderstood and underestimated. I think people should learn to look at pleasure more neutrally, not associate it so much to psychology, you just do the same thing you do when you observe pain/discomfort/suffering, you have to be minimal in your suppression/transformation of any given pleasure to correctly understand it at it's purest level, easier to observe stable pleasures that tend not to change too much like food rather than lets say a hyper complex "pleasure" in a hyper horrific trauma experience, or the pleasure of solving a rubick cube. Complex memory/event/actions are both pain/pleasure so you need objective observation of both which can then require your observational self itself to have a strong integrated measure of equanimity between these two, if you disfavor or favor either one too much you'll be unable to see what either really is at the highest and "lowest"(fundamental) levels, you have people that demonize pain too obviously but pleasure is horrifically misunderstood because in a way it's "higher" and closer to love/imagination(logic for some people) while pain is "lower" and closer to the body/hate. It's a masculine/femininize(minimally socio psychological, but it's fully there) energy intelligence thing.

Ya, I'm aware of all that and how people need to do more than have these experiences. I'm just wanting to know how much those experiences in particular change people's lives. Actually. Practically. Or if it's literally just that during these experiences you see things more clearly, then the experience ends and you have to integrate it and nothing really changed except your recollection of what you saw (not saying that's nothing, just that your behaviors won't change without implementing what you saw). ... Come to think of it... I remember Ralston speaking about for some people, entire behavior patterns just instantly fall away (I think the video is called something like "Consider instant transformation"). But then others not.

Love to hear & read all that. being part of your community and being able to learn directly has been the most profound driver of my growth over the past 6 years I've been around here. Excited to be part of this whole new experience & transformation. The team is here to help in any way we can

It seems to vary a lot and is highly personal. The transformational aspects that may come are your decisions to make. From the ego perspective, it doesn't make sense to want such radical transformations so it would seem "unproductive". But actually, this planet could use more selfless awakened healers/leaders, so if your self-identity becomes about the collective then it actually makes perfect sense once you yourself are healed and able to give more than you receive from the ego standpoint (eg, where you start to live in the reality that by giving to another that you're giving to yourself, but with self-respect also). Awakening does not guarantee this path it takes more decision-making to reach that, but it certainly can if used for this purpose on top of understanding. Understanding to me goes hand in hand with transformation so it just depends on what you are personally inspired to do. Deep awakenings can inspire you to be dedicated to being an artist, conscious leader, saint, empathic healer, spiritual teacher, etc on this planet, or just a really good/generous person. But to actualize those things you still have to actually decide for such. Or you can still live out the rest of this life through the ego perspective if that is what you feel inspired to do and there's nothing wrong with that either, or "away from society", it just highly depends on the individual and where they are at in their evolution. Most people's immediate concern is to heal their own traumas and internal conflicts, and that already can improve their lives drastically for themselves and the world, and I would say a requirement for the next steps. However it can also disorient you for some time and cause you to change your work and life drastically. It is helpful to have some support in your life during the awakening process if you have the luxury of such. Some people can awaken a lot and not really change that much or change very slowly, others it can cause a total shift that the person you once knew is no longer. The glory and love from God should inspire you but it's not a simple process, the permanent dissolution of the ego is an arduous process and there are many layers of it for most beings and takes some time if you are not born awakened at a young age. But sometimes you just know that that's what you're meant for in this incarnation, whereas others have to go through a few things and come back to it. During this time it's not uncommon to go through bouts of depression, suicidal thoughts, doubts, etc. So one might seem to the world that one is going insane and "lost it". But you will come out the other side and have grown from it.

"Much like the hermetically sealed alchemist's crucible, which when heated transforms base material into fabulous riches, the King as Center and as Transforming Vessel changes unintegrated psychological contents into the gold of personal and potentially global creative transformation." - Moore & Gilette I wish I could have the four "Within Books" on my bookshelf. I don't understand why such amazing books are out of print. I hope they come back one day.

@iceprincess I flow in what the moment asks me. First is to use intuition and listen to what people need. If I feel that Leo stuff will help I share, sometimes I share a book that helped me in that issue or a link to a podcast pr a music video. No worries of someone grow more than you. I would feel happy if any one in my influence circle could experience mystical states and experience deep transformation in their lifes. The more happy and healty people are around me better everything is. Fixing selfishness. That could be the title of a SelfHelp book.

Yeah, I figured out what I need to do, thanks to "our" ferrari Mind.. I just gotta do Stage Turquoise shit, to install the wisdom from Mind to Body. If you really want that, go study something called quantum linguistics. it's the same thing that they use in hypnotherapy.. --- @UDT Thanks! Yeah, I'm Doing Transformation Coaching.

How old are you? I heard a Turquoise Guru saying there happens a transformation for someone, every around 20 years or something like that.. I was born Green, at 21y.o. I reached Yellow,, what I mean is, you'll reach yellow really easy, don't worry about it, Just keep doing what your doing! I love that. <3

What sport or exercise benefits you the most? Curious on how it's helped you -mental health, body transformation, achievement? Do you feel like sport/exercise is a big part of your personal journey? I've been drawn to a lot of different exercise the past few years. For the past year I've been weight lifting in attempts to improve my physique, but recently slowed down on that and picked up martial arts again (bjj and boxing). I feel like it's benefited me massively in general happiness, fitness, gave me an outlet, and actually showed me that I'm capable of learning something. Hbu?