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In terms of situational evolution, you know how it is— you just find yourself situated, as it is. There's nothing special in that regard. It's natural. When you find the road naturally empty, creation acts in concert. Settling into situations, one simply waits to find out what happened. The practice of finding out what happened in the end is the unbending intent of subtle awareness pervading thoroughgoing open clarity of impersonal observation. One simply shares oneself openly in selfless adaption. Waiting in stillness, one observes Return. Ordinarily, people forget what they're doing, and begin going along unawares. The 16th chapter of the Tao te Chings says: "East Mountain walking on water" is indicating that "neither yin nor yang" is impersonal function within movement and stillness. So simply waiting for something to happen isn't a matter of passive stillness while opportunistically awaiting inevitability's fulfillment (or else assuming personal ascendancy over others in moving along towards somewhere more important). This neither movement nor stillness is the living bestowal of one's inherent potential in the midst of affairs. This waiting is uncontrived, sincerely open vulnerability. Enlightening being isn't passive. It isn't a matter of acting either. Some people throw around the term wu wei as if it is some other thing. Such subtle radiating presence IS you. Wu wei is East Mountain walks on water. But adepts aren't metaphors, so they swim in Suchness. Wu wei isn't a thing, nor is it an event. It is a reference to the essential character of one's function of enlightening being. This is not some other reality. It is the aware totality of oneself, unborn; in perpetuity before the first thought. It is spontaneous selfless response: adapting in full knowledge of potential by not conceiving complacent opportunism in everyday ordinary situations. This virtue is a direct result and further development of not following personal dialog unawares (talking to yourself). Unconscious mental rumination is the habitual cultivation of delusion in terms of selfish karmic psychological momentum. Carrying out one's unbending intent of subtle 24/7 observation of mind is the cultivation of enlightening qualities. This is practical application of authentic teaching in terms of establishing the foundation of enlightening practice. All self-refining activity entering into inconceivability develops from this foundation, as well as advanced practice employing use of the Mysterious Female. As mentioned in the previous post, watching over the task and function of the aperture of the Mysterious Female, one witnesses changes. In recognizing changes, one does not go along with creation. So selfless adaption isn't a matter of accommodating phenomena, it is directly responding to the time by virtue of seeing potential. Creation is already one's self, but response to other is why the term sameness within difference is spoken of in terms of Suchness. The buddhist term, sameness within difference, is an analytical reference warming up to the real deal in the teaching of Suchness. Karma needs time, so adepts excel in waiting. Don Juan Matus said that warriors have only two advantages over ordinary people in their affair with Power: will and patience. Enlightening beings respond to the time and so they naturally absorb potential from within the conditioned. The temporal is inherently absolute, so in responding to the time, enlightening beings respond to situations effectively by an abstraction of perceptivity in that they see through phenomena without denying its characteristics to aid nonpsychological evolution without going along with created cycles of karmic momentum. Seeing this is the functioning of Suchness as it is. Those partaking of ineffable reality do so by virtue of seeing alone. So in partaking of reality, real humans go in reverse, opposite the flow of creation. This is all there is to turning the light around spoken of in The Secret of the Golden Flower. This is the meaning of the saying, "It is as easy as turning over your hand". ed note: typo in line one; add quote after 2nd paragraph; change 4th paragraph; add to 6th

With the assistance of Awayfarer (a windfall of sorts, from my perspective), some preliminary aspects of Taoist alchemy have been broached. Perhaps I should segue into the topic of the Mysterious Female and the Valley Spirit. The Tao te Ching is perhaps the only book in which most readers will have ever read the words Mysterious Female and Valley Spirit in print. The terms represent that which is of monumental significance in the capacities and expression of enlightening being by adepts of spiritual alchemy. Those who know the valley spirit by having penetrated the immaterial aperture of the mysterious female have no need of specific sexual identities in terms of the personality (self and other). The aperture of the mysterious female is immaterial; it has no location. Penetrating this, one sees the valley spirit in its singularity; a legacy void of substance and boundary. The Tao te Ching calls it gossamer, as such, continually, on the brink of existence. How does one describe that which has no location? The puzzle is without remainder, yet is only entertained by the doubts of the human mentality. The valley spirit is where potential is activated; where change originates. The mysterious female (in terms of the name) is metaphoric. Mystery is movement: yang. Female is stillness: yin. Being neither yin nor yang, standing in equipoise ready by the gate and door of the Mysterious Female, observe life and death (in terms of situational evolution). This is knowing the pivot of change. So it is not only in mystical experience. When one can be still, one can witness return in everyday ordinary cycles of yin and yang. This is seeing the arising of potential. Seeing, in either case, doesn't use the senses, organs, or intellectual functions of the person. Seeing this is immediate impersonal knowledge. No one knows. When one sees the Mysterious Female, one attains the power of the unchanging or causeless Center. Therefore, one observing the pivot of stillness and movement is not subject to changing Change. This is because the Mysterious Female is the locus of change where the physical and psychological elements do not adhere. It is where change originates, so this is where adepts await the time to steal potential at its upwelling incipient source. The saying goes, "Refine the self and await the time." By effective self-refinement, one is naturally situated to take over creation and steal its potential. Remember, this aperture is neither an aperture nor does it have a location. The Mysterious Female is real. It is the site of all wonders. When you actually see the the Mysterious Female and attain the pivot of creation, you attain it forever. When you stand ready by the gate and door of the aperture of the Mysterious Female, and see worldly elements being pulled through the inconceivable aperture by the self-centered gravity of collectively ignorant momenta, and see its projection by that karmic inertial momentum dissolve into space, it's kind of sad, in a way. But you're not~ hahahahhaaa❤!! The task is the "door". The gate is the opening and closing of the Mysterious Female. In terms of the task of self-refining adaption to conditions, The Art of War states that victory is up to the enemy and that one must choose the ground of death in order to live. Self-refinement is like finding the place of victory, and awaiting the enemy to fulfill its fate. You don't know what that is, but you know where it will be when you see it. The analogy is imperfect, in terms of positing "enemy" as the conditional asset of the natural arising of killing energy, because there is no punitive or prejudicial relationship to be had in adapting to others' conditioned self-serving intents and purposes in this context. It is another reference to the device of "Host and Guest" mentioned previously. It is one's bid with Power by virtue of enlightening subtle adaption to creation. Adepts have the knowledge of the gate and door of the Mysterious Female and await the inevitable's arrival. The pivot of awareness is where one awaits inevitability at the gate and door of the Mysterious Female at the time of the Yin Convergence, when yang culminates and the killing energy of yin arises. This is the inevitable. Like clockwork, as you wait at the "gate" at the right time, you show the inevitable the "door". When you show it the door, it dissolves, as it were, and the aperture revolves; opening and closing. "One yang, one yin; one opening, one closing: therein is change." This is the fate of the changeable. "Showing it the door" is not going along with it. Karma dissolves and you somehow stand aloof with potential intact. This is inconceivable accord in reality. It's just the way it is, and no one knows why. Here are two terms not customarily used: inner and outer Mysterious Female. This from Thomas Cleary's notes to his translation of ancient alchemic poems of female adepts in Immortal Sisters — Secret Teachings of Taoist Women. 1989, North Atlantic Books ed note: change sexual identity to sexual identities, and add next two sentences in 5th paragraph; change 2nd sentence in paragraph 7; add to 8th paragraph; typo in 9th; change "aspect" to "asset", add "…in adapting to others' conditioned self-serving intents and purposes…" in 10th; collapse bottom quote window; italicize "Immortal Sisters…" in last sentence

Nonduality teacher Roger Castillo and other spiritual teachers have said that anger can arise as a biological reaction even in the enlightened state. Then how can I claim that anger is a sign of the personal stage of development and that the transpersonal stage is free from anger? Because as I discovered and mentioned earlier there is a difference between spiritual enlightenment and the transpersonal stage. As Ken Wilber has pointed out, there can be spiritual enlightenment at different levels of personal development. So when anger arises and a biological reaction, then that's because the person is at the personal stage of development, even when enlightened. At the transpersonal stage anger is only an additional expression, not something fundamental to the stage. So expressions of anger can appear even at the transpersonal stage, not as an instinctual biological reaction since there is harmony but as reactions to particular situations for impersonal reasons.

Awayfarer commented above: Momentum is due to mental conception, I did not say momentum is inconceivable. That which is conceivable is anything and everything that can be named. Eternity is conceivable in that it is another name for the endless multiplicity of creation and its multifarious incremental processes. The opening chapter of the Tao te Ching states that the (true) Way cannot be named. I have to admit that it does say such an unnamable way is eternal, but that is a translation issue. In technical terms, I say the eternal is relative to karma, existence, creation and its incremental aspect, whereas the inconceivable (Way) is Unborn, uncreated aware nonbeing; that is, the source of the essence of (potential) reality before it has fallen into the Creative. Uncreated cannot be a thing, and since the Creative aspect is attributable to its inconceivable nature, the existence of existence is spoken of by authentic teaching as essentially illusion. In terms of alchemic practice, one is cautioned to only work with what is unseen and to not work with what can be seen. This means spiritual transformation is accomplished by working with essence (the unborn) directly. If one works with energy (created), one will necessarily end up with accomplishment relative to the creative. The analogous phrase is: as above, so below. The inconceivable is unknowable (in terms of rational mentation). In terms of nonpsychological awareness, the inconceivable can be seen, in that knowledge is immediate. Thought processes relative to the personality are not applicable, therefore such knowledge is not relative to the person. That's why I say enlightening activity isn't the person— in addition, the working definition of enlightening response is that which is carried out in the midst of ordinary affairs without relying on one's own power. That's what makes such response a matter of spiritual adaption. Open clarity is the nature of the human mentality when its habit energy ceases. When habit energy comprising the human mentality ceases all at once, mind is as it was of yore: open, clear, untrammeled, sensitive, effective, un-perturbable. There are no two minds. The inconceivable is your own unborn mind right now in that it is not within the realm of rationalism. It is your own mind right now void of psychological patterning and self-reifying thoughts; in other words, it is void of habit energy. This is the meaning of the phrase, Mind is one. Conditioning is what one aims to get rid of in the endless process of self refinement. What is refined? The errant human mentality. When patterning is eradicated, the capacity of rationalism is left intact— only the habitual use of rational self-reifying pattern-awareness is absent. So the activation of one's innate enlightening being is the correlative absence of reliance on the personality's false identity. Without that crutch, ego is no longer needlessly active and nonpsychological awareness is ably sufficient to adapt spiritually (nonpsychologically) to conditional situations inconceivably, with the aid of the objective impersonal mode of rationalism. This is the meaning of spiritual adaption, in terms of self-refining activity: one's enlightening function is by virtue of spiritual and physical sublimation; the gradual process of going through endless situational transformations, whereby one enters the Tao in reality. This is not a reference to sudden enlightenment. So there is no intrinsic meaning to reality, conditioned or otherwise. It is what it is, and no one knows why. Either one gradually builds upon conditioned qualities, or one gradually builds upon enlightening qualities. Entering the mystery of mysteries is the option for those with the audacity and the will to discover human beings' innate enlightening function through the long process of self-refinement. Spiritual alchemy is the taoist name for a tradition effecting a range of teaching devices describing various aspects of the specific process in terms of phenomenal and inconceivable elements. The process itself is natural. No one invented it. Reality's innate enlightening quality is evidence of our inconceivable nature. Prior illuminates of all traditions have left the secret behind for those with the wherewithal to approach and apply the source of enlightenment in the midst of delusion by virtue of delusion due to the fact that our true identity being pure awareness is unified selfless consciousness. How wonderful is that! ed note: add 2nd and 3rd paragraph; typo 2nd paragraph

Awayfarer wrote: I will get to true spontaneity at some point, but to respond to what you said at the end of your post most definitely… Yes!! Failing to conceive is absolutely key. Taoism calls it "forgetting thoughts and feelings, preserving the fundamental." Buddhism calls this liberation. The punchline of the famous dialog between the Emperor of China and Bodhidharma is when the emperor (finally) asks, "Who is talking to me?" "Don't know.", is Bodhidharma's reply. The Emperor asked who, in terms of self and other. Bodhidharma's reply was likewise twofold, in terms of the personal, relative perspective, as well as in terms of absolute nature. In terms of the relative "who", Bodhidarma's response was a stern, but veiled rebuke face to face with the Emperor of China: he said, "Don't know.", as in don't conceive who in terms of self and other, when the context is enlightenment. Why? Because Enlightenment is already your own (impersonal selfless) mind right now. Bodhidharma might as well have responded to the Emperor's question (of who?), by saying, "Who wants to know.", which might be fine in some instances, but not this one. Or, in other words, "Do you know your own mind?" In certain contexts that might be taken to mean, "Are you crazy?" —Which is precisely what one does NOT say to an Emperor anywhere on this planet. But such a remark is as perfectly apropos in that conversation of long ago as it is in referencing the conditioned human mental processes today, because conditioned thought patterning (psychological momentum reifying the false identity of the conditioned personality of the being that is going to die) is the working definition of mental illness: mental dis-ease. That's why Buddhism's definition of liberation as being free of conceiving (thoughts) is the nature of enlightenment itself, as well as the personal power to avail oneself of the capacity to do so and be such a one to have impersonally ascertained experience oneself as the knowledge of pure awareness: the knowledge of no thing. There is no thing. There is nothing to know: don't know!, he said. Bodhidharma told the Emperor of China to "Stop it!" Bodhidharma left the Emperor immediately. Smart man. So the nature of enlightenment is what bodhidharma was referring to as well. In the context of his response to the Emperor, he said, "Don't know." He was speaking for himself as well, and in this aspect his response was again twofold in expressing both the absolute within the conditional as well as the absolute in itself. "Don't know" in terms of the absolute within the conditional is bodhidharma admitting that there is no such one to know nor is there such a one knowing (who). In terms of the Absolute exclusive of the conditional, his response is the open expression of enlightening accord in Reality, such that there is no who to speak of and no who speaking (to the Emperor). Bodhidharma didn't say "I don't know." He simply said, "Don't know." Such a terse and unspeakably brilliant response to anyone, much less while being on the spot with the Emperor of China who perhaps was the most powerful person on the planet at that time, could not have been planned. This case in point is a fortuitous example of blatant spontaneous subtle spiritual adaption getting one's ass out of a dilemma of monumental proportions. Yet not getting executed was not Bodhidharma's motive. Enlightened response has no motive. The Emperor was pissed— his was not a trick question. The Emperor simply didn't understand what Bodhidharma was talking about (and he knew as much). But what the Emperor didn't know was that Bodhidharma was giving the interview. Bodhidharma had called on the Emperor to ascertain his spiritual evolvement to see if sponsorship of authentic teaching in China 2000 years ago was possible. Who knew? The Emperor wasn't, so the Emperor didn't, so mr B. Dharma had to get the hell out of Dodge and made haste in a southerly direction for quite some time. Good thing too. At the time, Taoism had been established in China for millennia (since before China had been a glimmer in any emperors' eye), but Bodhidharma's high-altitude Kashmiri brand of Mind Only buddhism was just what effective (or not) taoist teaching and its esoteric/elitist traditions needed: a fire under its butt. By 1100~1300 AD, the Quantzhen (taoist) tradition had not only incorporated buddhist methods effectively, it was openly espousing the validity of the three main Chinese spiritual traditions of the era (buddhism, taoism and Confucianism) as direct expressions of the Source of all religion: which had long been expressed (by taoism) as Tao, or the Way; the way which cannot be named. Transcendent teaching is not religion, nor does it characterize itself in terms of a perpetuation of any specific teaching tradition. The source being none other than anyone's and everyone's true identity: impersonal, sellflessly awake, uncreated. In terms of transcendent teaching being the source of religion, the fact is that Mind is itself the true progenitor of enlightening being and its practical expression coming from within the karmic matrix of the Creative, in that there are no two minds: Mind is one. ed note: add "The punchline…" to 3rd paragraph; add the word "not" in 1st sentence of 8th paragraph

Over the years of self-actualization my way of communicating has become largely more impersonal. Less use of 'I' and 'you'. I sort of talk into the air and let people grab from it rather than speaking 'at' somebody. It has begun to effect my relationships in a way that makes them feel weaker and sometimes unnecessary. Which is sort of scary. I tend to get closer to the heart of an issue faster but risk others taking offense to the content of my message. It just seems to be a byproduct of seeing straight to the truth. The ideal thing would seem to be if other individuals could pacify their reflexes to taking offense. That's what I have done and its rewarded me in feeling less suffering and again getting closer to the center of obvious issues. Howeve, instilling this in others is out of my control. I know I can't be alone in this and wonder what were your responses to this happening. Are you pushing through that discomfort and continue to search for truth in the face of making everyone around you upset or do you backpedal and try to find some sort of medium or compartmentalize for the sake of maintaining some sort of adhesion to typical social customs?

Awayfarer wrote: I have been practicing turning the light around throughout the day in real life situations. When you said above: "Going along with creation, one is bound by karma. In reverse, its transcendence is the use of karmic energy to access real (uncreated) potential, to match creation, whereby one functions transcendentally in the midst of delusion on delusion's terms." - Is this the same as "changing Change"? And the same as turning the light around? I really like your question, Awayfarer. Leaving "changing Change" aside for the moment, yes, it is all "turning the light around", as described in Thomas Cleary's translation of The Secret of the Golden Flower. The light is the same going along with creation or in going in reverse. Likewise, essence is karmic energy in terms of going along with the Creative as well as comprising potential when going in reverse, by "shining the light on its source". Wherever one shines the light by one's deluded or enlightening perspective, is the determining factor whether potential is "gathered" for the immortal elixir or lost by delusional perpetuation of the karmic matrix of all time. They are the same. Those who understand this, see this, and operate transcendentally by this are said to express the Virtue of Receptivity and know the nature of Suchness. Taoism refers to the knowledge and nature of innate being as Complete Reality. This is because knowledge of Complete Reality and being completely real oneself is identical. Knowledge is itself being. Suchness and Complete Reality refer to the same aspect of functional enlightening being. Just the world itself is it. Karma is itself the ground of enlightening being in terms of seeing essence (by having reversed the effect of conditioned awareness from the psychological momentum of habit energy to the point of perpetual upwelling of potential where one rests in the highest good). The term "seeing essence" used here is not a reference to sudden enlightenment, rather it denotes seeing complete reality as such. Seeing complete reality as such is impersonal accord in reality. Selflessness as such, is neither good nor bad, neither right nor wrong, neither self or other nor before or after. Enlightening accord within reality is the nature of selflessness, no different than the nature of awareness being selfless. Selflessness just is. It has nothing to do with arbitrary moral injunctions to guilt-trip yourself and others with. It's just your nature. Selflessness is the impersonal nature of reality. It's you! Your identity is as absolutely and selflessly aware as anything else. You are not the person, you are its aware quality. There is no thing. There are no explanations, only vague descriptions. It is beyond words. You are an inconceivable being. I say that delusion and reality look the same in everyday ordinary situations because it's true. Reality doesn't look any different than delusion. They really are the same. The point of real illumination is oneself alone whether one goes along or turns the light around. This point of illumination where essence either congeals as energy or remains unborn as potential is called the Mysterious Pass. It is none other than one's own mind right now. Neither ordinary nor holy, all wonders arise from this. It is possible to use the Mysterious Pass and its Valley Spirit inexhaustibly. The Tao te Ching says as much in chapters 4, 5 and 6 right off the top of my head. Laotse's document is a glossary and a codebook for immortalists. "Going along" is using the psychological apparatus habitually unawares. Appropriate application of conscious psychological awareness according to the time is not different than resting in the highest good in that the mind of Tao is none other than the human mentality void of unconscious habit energy in terms of unconsciously following psychological momentum of karmic self and other. The same can be said of having activated one's enlightening function by turning the light around, in that one can be said to "unconsciously follow the laws of god." This all means that adepts use karma to access potential, in that one is said to "pick out the real from within the false." But I have already described the fact that the two are the same essence without beginning. It's just a manner of speaking to help people avoid the mistake of grasping the one and rejecting the other. This refers to those who may be obstructed by provisional, reformative teachings by mistakenly clinging to ideas of renunciation and denial. Not that those with heavy karmic bonds haven't benefitted by such temporary remedies. When one sees potential in the midst of delusion, in terms of critical junctures of time and place set up by karma, deliberate action is eons away, as one does not rely on one's own power to respond to situations. One just knows to pass through as such. The situational aspect denotes a relativity to time, timing and audacity. Enlightening activity is not relative to conventions of avoidance strategies. One just passes through directly, sharing oneself with open hands. It's the darnedest thing. It sounds just like poofs ! hahahhahahhaa!! ed note: add 6th paragraph

Much more basic than human civilizations of course, but as far as the animal kingdom goes this is incredible phenomena. The ants despite their size hold territories hundreds of metres in length and have complex stratergies to defend them. They build dozens of nests consisting of complex labyrinths between the cannopies which they link via branch networks. The nests act as areas for food storage and barracks for their soldier ants that defend foreign weaver ants and other insects occupying their space. I find it incredible that nature on such a small scale is possible of such complex operations, it reminds me of what Peter Ralston mentions in his book on 'pursuing consciousness' that Self can be thought of as a force. This force is impersonal but what ever it acts on has an inclination towards preservation of its state and aggrandisement for its survival and against decay. This also shows that your human intelligence is an active process of the universe and is impersonal even your failures. The universe is all YOU and it is nothing

Dear gswva, Once again: I'm not enlightened. My knowledge is only through the scriptures I read and videos that I watch online. It's very much possible my knowledge is flawed. Without enlightenment we can only speculate. Even with enlightenment, it seems there are various levels of enlightenment with different knowledge and more depth to such knowledge. Having understood this, we can only speculate. So, lets speculate: From my understanding, all the descriptions that we give about the Brahman are just that: Descriptions and Thoughts. Even the word Brahman is just a label and as such is just a thought. Neither can you say it exist, nor can you say it doesn't exist. It exists without existing. It is the pure absolute nothingness. So absolute in its emptiness that it becomes the very source of every unique thing. Yet, none of those things are different from it. They only exist in and as itself. The way we think and believe seems to be the way Brahman seem to appear to us(Just like the AI in the movie Captain Marvel). In Non-Dual Traditions: The same reality is experienced as nameless and formless but with all potential. In Bhakthi Traditions: Those who worship krishna report visiting krishna and his abode Goloka(Krishna's abode); those who worship shiva talk about their experiences of shiva; similarly the Devi(goddess) has been seen(e,g: Ramakrishna paramahamsa frequently talked with "kali devi"). Similarly, visiting heaven and christ in christianity; Egyptian gods in ancient egypt etc.. In which ever way we create our karma(Cause & Effect - Tendencies, Beliefs, Conditioning, Memories, Behaviours, etc). such seems to be our experience. Each of these worshipers actually experience reality as if their god is the one who created the entire reality and He/She/They/It is the one who is presiding over everything. Such gods actually show to their devotees through certain experiences how they are the alpha and omega of everything(Best e.g: Virat Rupa(Universal Form) of Krishna shown to Arjuna in the battlefield). During such experiences the devotees actually experience their deity to be anything and everything, with all the descriptions and experiences of non-dual liberation as well as dual liberations being present within their deity itself. Although the deity seen with a form, still at the same time being infinite; with everything present within themselves; Just like fractals although seem to have a limited form; after having zoomed in, will reveal infinite patterns with infinite depth. I'll give you just one example of how they experience their realities based on their belief: "In Gaudiya Vaishnava school of bhakthi(Devotional) tradition(ISKCON). Their deity is Krishna. They make a distinction between Material reality and Spiritual reality. Spiritual reality having many varieties of infinite realms all being completely perfect and eternal. Each realm has a certain form of Krishna presiding over that realm. There is no suffering in any of those realms whatsoever. All of them are filled only with blissful experiences. When they want to experience material reality they descend and have them and again return back to their own abodes. Anybody who develops devotion and worships Krishna believing the stories about him with full unconditional loving intensity; after getting liberation in bhakthi(Dual type liberation) and after giving up their physical body, they go to such places and stay there eternally(I doubt it being eternal - But, who knows) Then, Krishna also creates these Material reality where infinite universes are generated and dissolved again and again. Within each of which: material heavens, hells and earthly experiences are experienced according to the karma of the living entities with incarnation and reincarnation cycles going on again and again. until liberation happens. But, they say that all these material heavens and hells and earthly realms are all temporary and will get destroyed during universal dissolution. And all of them are born in a new universe and are placed in situations suitable for their karma. Also, enjoyment and suffering in earth, heaven or hellish realms are experienced only as long as the karma for such enjoyment or suffering lasts. As such, are only temporary. Karma keeps generating and doesn't run out as long as actions are done with attachment for material fruits. In this tradition, there were and still are very exalted enlightened beings who have experienced these realms/realities directly and written about them. These realities are not experienced as hallucinatory. The realities when being experienced are more profound and vivid than even our own earthly reality. In one such story, a sage during his meditation on his lord was experiencing such a realm and got his finger burnt in that realm. When he opened his eyes in our realm, his finger actually was burnt even in our realm(remember that scene in Matrix?)." The experiences mentioned above are only experienced as such by those who follow Gaudiya Vaishnava Tradition(ISKCON) which is just one sub-tradition within the vaishnava tradition within Hinduism. Like this, there are literally more than thousand of other traditions within Hinduism itself. There are 33 million gods in Hinduism it is said. Likewise, there are many different religions in other parts of the world each with their own belief and customs and traditions. Just like the e.g given above, all of them experience their LIFE based on how they create their own karma(Cause & Effect, tendencies, beliefs, conditioning, memories, behaviors, etc).. They experience their gods, heavens , hells and other such things, the way they imagined and believed. All of this is just like water in the mirage. As such you can say, it doesn't exist. But then, as some form of an imagination itself, all of it is real. Just like dreams when experienced are reacted-to-emotionally by the dreamer as being real as long as they are being experienced. Please read the sample screenshots of Yoga Vasishta from these posts first: Once you understand basics of how reality is constructed by reading the above mentioned posts, you'll understand that any reality is seen only within some mind(Jiva - Individuated atomic living entity). Just like dream world is seen within the dreamer's mind. Just as Imagination is seen within the mind of the one imagining it. There is no possibility of projecting any reality outside of a mind. Our reality is also one such reality projecting within some mind. That being the case, Every reality is only an imaginary one. Even the mind that projects it is also just a mirage. All of this duality with all its universes/realities within such minds is like a water seen in the mirage(Think of such minds as mirages and water seen in the mirages as the worlds seen in such minds). Both mirage and water seen in it are unreal. They exist without existing. Also if we assume everything is intelligently designed, afaik all "past lives" memories could be imaginary and unrelated to the actual mechanics consciousness shapes itself. I'm not denying reincarnation but I'm just saying it doesn't prove anything. Brahman and intention are incompatible with one another. It is not a personal entity. It is completely impersonal and formless. It is beyond intent and intellectualizing. There is nothing that can be said about it. Upon reaching it, all activity stops. No word or thought or imagination can touch it. It exists without existing. You are one with that Brahman they say.. A mere simple movement ( (metaphorical) which is natural and is a characteristic of Brahman; like movement of air is natural for the wind) in Brahman projects out infinite upon infinite of atomic Jiva(s)(Living entities with mind) into existence. The conscious intelligent design only happens(Not consciously happen in all of them) after the Jiva(s) have come into being within Brahman. Within the minds of those Jiva(s): world, rules and regulations, intelligence, logic all these things appear. These are NOT prior to the minds. For first appeared Primary Jiva(s), as well as secondary Jiva(s) - created within those Primary Jiva(s)'s minds; there is no karma initially. But, after acting as and within the world for some time; memories, tendencies, tastes, behavioral patterns, likes and dislikes, all of these are slowly acquired and they act as a repetitive compulsive cycles after a while, these patterns are what are called as vasanas and samskaras. These are collectively called as karma of that individual. As all the entities have such patterns, you can call it as collective karma of each of such groups. Just as when water flows upon land; creates a river bed by flowing continuously; and not able to change its path but to flow within the same riverbed after a while. Similarly, karma after creating some of it becomes a compulsive pattern, creating more and more which is hard to break. Just like a river without a riverbed disperses itself into all directions and ceases to exist as a river. Similarly, without karma, the individual will dissolve and cease to exist. Such dissolution is called liberation. Further Speculation: "Not all those Jiva(s) projecting such worlds within them are very intelligent. So these primitive, first order Jivas only project some dumb random, abstract, useless, not so sophisticated; not so very conscious reality within themselves. Initially they don't possess any knowledge whatsoever. After their death. After having gone through several cycles of interaction with other jivas through reincarnation in other jiva(s)'s universes as one of the living entities in those universes and having evolved into higher conscious states(through such interaction by natural evolution which happens randomly as well as driven by karma) as human beings or other such entities, they get more knowledge. These Jivas after their death in other Jiva's mental world/universe/realm might project very sophisticated universes within their own mind(Even during the lowly evolved states they may project some unsophisticated universes within themselves in some of the after-life cycles). Such projection may not happen within each after-life cycle; only when a compatible universe is not found for the karma that this jiva currently possesses that this Jiva may create such a projection. Even then it may simply wait in limbo for a compatible universe. Again, these projections either sophisticated or unsophisticated; may not be conscious ones. Just like our dreams are not experienced with lucidity with full consciousness of knowing them to be dreams. Similarly these projections may also happen unconsciously within themselves. Within these projected universes, there will be numerous Jiva(s) either reincarnated from other realities who have qualities which are compatible with this universe, or newly created ones without having had any karma before. These newly created jivas, can be directly human beings, deities, or any other such evolved beings which the jiva projecting the universe has previous knowledge of. These other jivas each further creating a universe within themselves in their after-life periods, with more jivas within them...with the cycle going ad-infinitum". As far as Reincarnation is concerned, since it happens only with-in the mirage like realities/universes, it also is just a type of illusory experiential cycle experienced in them. Although just an illusory experiential cycle, it does exist however as such; driven by karma. We do have strong evidence for that. As I already presented. You need to understand first that, even the universal mind which projects the world as well as the entities incarnate and reincarnate within it, both/all of them are bound by their karma. Although, if more conscious the Jiva becomes, more ability it has - to act with freedom/freewill with less influence from karma. Some Yogis/saints/sages may take the position of such universal mind and project some highly sophisticated realities/universes/realms. Such Universal minds(Jivas(s)) may be with almost absolute freedom(E.g: Krishna in Goloka - Such Jiva(s) are not called as Jiva(s) They are called Bhagawan-Supreme Gods and goddesses for those who worship them). The Abodes/Realities/Universes/Worlds/Heavens what ever you want to call it; created by such Bhagawan/God like entities who have attained very highly unimaginable levels of consciousness/awareness are the worlds where suffering and reincarnation doesn't exist. Whether these worlds exist eternally or not I don't know. It may be a possibility, but I'm not sure. There may be infinite such worlds with varying degrees of sophistication. Depending upon the consciousness prevailing in any reality, reincarnation may or may not be a fact in that reality. May be even in our own realities, not every one reincarnate. I don't know how it works. What I do know is: Karma is what drives reincarnation or any other experience as an individuated entity. Having understood all of this clearly. Keeping the example of Gaudiya Vaishnava tradition in mind. If we think about each of the models you have presented, Even though you have presented them as if each of your models encompass all of absolute existence. Still it is possible to reduce them into different possible realities and it is easily possible that each of those models of reality may be truly be experienced in some of those universes/realities in some of those minds imagining/creating them. Even if such realities doesn't exist anywhere now, they can still be created by imagining them in a certain state of mind, either through Meditation(like mentioned in Yoga Vasishta) or even after Physical Death by keeping on intensely imagining them again and again in your living time now. So, scriptures say that In what ever state of mind you leave your body, during death, that state you'll attain without fail. This is just like how we dream at night about those things which we intensely contemplated in our waking state. Also, you'll only experience those realities and experiences, about which you have knowledge of or atleast related to your mental and karmic structure as a natural progression of your karma. Absolutely random experiences may be a very rare phenomenon. What I meant is if everything is created before merging together or if nothing splits itself until it finds itself again Not necessary for all of creations to merge before other cycle of creations emerge. Infinite creations are keeping on emerging and dissolving infinitely in infinite minds simultaneously. This cycle never stops. Such is the nature of Brahman - Just like breathing is the nature of a human being. Having said that, this is only from the view given in the book:Yoga Vasishta. But, this also depends on your beliefs and world view. Remember: that you only experience what your mental structure believes and allows. The video posted above of Rupert Spira has somewhat a good explanation. For this very reason some people may remember some other people's experiences & memories as their own(As one can read somewhat similar experiences in Yoga Vasishta). But, he seems to assume all the individuated entities as loosely bound with loose covering. But, It is only true for certain individuals in certain states of karma and for certain periods and types of disembodiment. After death, it seems; generally the individuated entities are tightly bound with remaining 4 layers(more like aspects than layers) of coverings mostly intact which I have mentioned in my previous posts. Because of this, these entities acquiring the karmas and memories of other's may be rare. The obscure thing to me is what happens after the state of oneness and how would you know that. If it's empty/void awareness, or non-individualized infinite creation. In the first case, form = fear, duality directly yields the illusion of ego. In the latter case, form =/= fear, ego is not necessary to the awareness of anything. We also need to know if we can split ourselves again or not. May be we need to experience Non-Dual enlightenment to understand this. "Ramakrishna Paramahamsa" has said that merging into brahman is like a salt doll walking into the ocean. After merging with the ocean there is no coming back. Seems like all non dual scriptures say the same thing. I haven't studied all of them though. May be those who suffer too much choose to dissolve when such an opportunity presents itself. Whereas, those who improve more and more through their effort gain new heights of awareness and consciousness creating their own realities and living in it with full bliss eternally(? - I'm not sure). Sadhguru says in his book that there is no need to keep extending the individuation as every kind of universe has same fundamental structures. But, I don't agree with it. If it has no value; then, why are others creating such realities and keeping their individuation. He himself admitted that he doesn't have much scriptural knowledge. Maybe, too much confidence in one's own ability without proper theoretical knowledge may create such illusions. Also, as I mentioned already, you can only experience those experiences you believe and have knowledge about. Interestingly in the Gaudiya vaishnava tradition, although some of them say that such merging is a permanent suicide. Others say that even attaining liberation through merging with brahman is useless because it is only temporary and after a while they again fall down from that position. May be in this situation is where Rupert Spira's explanation may make sense, because during merging with Brahman there are no coverings and all those layers are completely dismantled. So the memories, tendencies and karma of all the merged individuals remain in the reservoir of Brahman and some of the newly created entities in the universes are created with the template of combination of already existing karmas and experiences from the Brahman reservoir and their individual constitution is made in such a way, that each of those newly created individuals are perfectly compatible with the universal mind which is imagining them according to its karma, For those individuals where such combination is not immediately available, maybe only they are created freshly without any karma. Maybe because the newly created individuals in this manner are not entirely uniquely their own selves as they previously were, it is for this reason that it may have been said that: once merged, its finished. It may also be possible that some or all of these merged entities when there is a compatible universe exists, each of these entire entities is brought back with the same configuration. And as such experience themselves as same persons they were before in one of their previous incarnations. The above cases makes sense because it is said that by doing samyama any information can be retrieved that one wishes to retrieve. It would only be possible if all the information is stored permanently somewhere. It is also possible that only information is permanent and not the individuals themselves with all their karmic configurations. Above all, it is also highly possible that each of these cases is possible in some versions of cultural realities whose cultures imagine realities in such different manners mentioned above. Absolutely anything seems to be possible(Both Possibility as well as Impossibility). In order to get proper understanding of reality, you have to read both of these books completely: (Even then you may not understand everything, But will definitely improve your knowledge) Please read this book(Yoga Vasishta) without skipping anything: https://estudantedavedanta.net/The-Supreme-Yoga-Swami-Venkatesananda.pdf Death - An Inside Story: A book for all those who shall die Book by Sadhguru: https://www.google.com/books/edition/Death_An_Inside_Story/ydzQDwAAQBAJ?hl=en&gbpv=1&printsec=frontcover

Sorry, only now i saw your comment. Yes, absolutely related. Weak sense of reality is how I define the feeling of being ungrounded. When you are too much in your head and not in your body, you create your sense of reality through thoughts, logic, and overly-theorization. This phenomenon is described in-depth in the book "The Betrayal Of The Body" by Alexander Lowen. There, he talks in terms of the character structure he calls "schizoid". They are people that, due to the inability to deal with extreme negative feelings like fear, retreat in their heads and kind of forget the body, making them one step away from the schizophrenic. They do that in order to not enter in a full-blown psychotic state. Chakra one imbalance. Schizoid types are basically chronically ungrounded people, they describe this kind of unrealism about life, like their are living in a state of dream, where things do not appear real (in a sense of SOLIDLY REAL). It is like watching life behind the lenses of a binocle, things get too fluid and impersonal. I relate a LOT with all those symptoms and most my immediate family (mom, aunt and grandmother) suffer from it, I was raised in a household full of schizoid people that are completely unaware of their condition, which creates a huge shitshow. I am no different from them, but i have a lot of self-awareness and this gives me at least a chance to overcome this state. Needless to say that psychedelics to schizoid people are dangerous. I have a good experience of psychedelic use but at some point, they got overwhelming for me because i was ungrounded and didn't knew that. The feeling is literally losing your mind, going crazy, which is a big fear of mine due to my family history of mental problems. During my worst trips, i remember doing my best to "grab" unto anything that seems familiar and "solid" for me, could be a good friend, a familiar/safe place like a bedroom or even a tree (yes lol in one of my ayahuasca trips i literally started hugging a tree to ground myself).

They are also just story characters in a collective impersonal mind. I only want to be as conscious as Voldemort was. You'll never find my horcruxes.

Great notes and also self observations, @seeking_brilliance . The term 'deficient emptiness' is one that I find useful which encapsulates the core of a variety of negative states of consciousness and the practice is to develop the capacity to sit with it. Sitting with it then allows space for transformations to occur. On the subject of suffering is a quote from the Fourth Way work. I find it very sustinct and to the point distinguishing unnecessary suffering and intentional (conscious) suffering. The first is Unnecessary Suffering. This would be the type of suffering that we incur because of our unreasonable attitudes and expectations towards others, from our ill-will, hatred and rejection of others, from doubt, possessiveness, arrogance and self pity. In other words, suffering arising from our self-importance. The second is Unavoidable Suffering. This would be the type of suffering that comes to us by accident or from events beyond our control, such as interpersonal conflicts, war, disaster, disease or death. Third, we have Voluntary Suffering. This would be the type of suffering that we take upon ourselves in order to accomplish a personal aim, such as an athlete who disciplines himself to win a race, or a student who labours to get good grades. And finally we have Intentional Suffering. According to Bennett, this would be the kind of suffering that we take upon ourselves in order to accomplish an impersonal or altruistic goal, one that is directed more towards service to others or to the Work, and not for any personal gain. I too, have used cannabis for dissociating from the world. If one is half aware that that is what's going on, though, it looses its effectiveness and although not immediately, integration to some degree will occur. I'm just saying this seems to be the case in my own life. IME, A great hardcore practice for dealing with suffering is ruthlessly observing ones own schadenfreude. It's culturally acceptable to wish ill on the bad guys in the movies but when these kinds of thoughts arise in association with family and friends, it's another story. If not observed and sorted out and dealt with, these kinds of thoughts can hurl one into a psychic entropy. I can give myself some space and declare yes, a reactive part of me is saying this but in my heart of hearts, this is not me and I say NO to this negative little sub personality. After engaging in this kind of Inquiry, I even begin to have empathy towards people who are chronically negative in some way, realizing that they're caught up in suffering and being propelled automatically in reactive behavior. In a sense, they're caught up in their own Hell. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schadenfreude

S'body wrote: Yes. This is good. Thank you. I feel that if too much karma is left not dealt with there is an inevitable descent back into personal consciousness to resume participation in the narrative of self. For me the personal consciousness became the object of meditation and the content of the narrative lost its magnetism. There was no longer much of an "I" in the events, just an impersonal stream of events unpopulated by a belief in doers. In a passive way, the consciousness contemplated the consciousness. Objects and obstacles disappeared. Things vanished and became fields of universal happening. The personal laws of cause-effect crumbled and were replaced by a holism that moved and helped further unwinding. Eventually a different critical mass was reached. A sickness took over and the personal consciousness found food with which to grow strong again. The narrative resumed with myself at the center as the thinker, schemer, doer, etc. I saw this happening and agreed with myself that a deeper integration and knowledge of the world was necessary. I had cast off the story before tying up important loose ends. Now I'm just tangled in all the loose ends and realizing there really is no tying things up without total courage, which I lack. Taking stock of one's current state of affairs is much to be admired, dear. That and the subsequent narrative are indicative of much honesty, not to mention insight, so I wouldn't give what you are referring to as courage a second thought, in my estimation. You have all you need to continue this. I dare say one's "tying up loose ends" is simply a matter of treading the gradual path of self-refinement. There is never any finality in this regard, as the sudden and the gradual are an open-ended singularity. Before and after in terms of realization are a formality. Reality is unborn~ it is mind. Just continue as you were. There is no one to accomplish this tying up. The world is unravelling as you meet it intimately; ultimately you will realize that nothing whatsoever as your primordial resting place is where nothing left to loosen or gather is in actuality your present condition. In going on, it is only creation itself fully displayed. In terms of Unity, essential stable awareness has no coming or going whether in holding firm or releasing in the midst of ordinary affairs. The quote I pasted from your post above is absolutely where it's at. This aspect has no end. With open hands, accept your function and take the forward step, forthwith to gather or release according to the time. Alternating thusly, is just cultivating the empty field without thought of loss or gain. Just this is going through endless transformations, sublimating the self spiritually and physically, planting lotuses in fire, entering the tao in reality. May I be so bold as to recommend a small thin volume called Cultivating the Empty Field, by Hongzi (1091~1157). Translated by Daniel Leighton ISBN: 0-86547-475-3 (pbk); 0-86547-474-5 (hdbk). Hongzi helped me a lot, in terms of "taking the forward step" in order to meet creation on its terms and selflessly integrate enlightenment in the aftermath of the sudden. Also, my response in some places has the unmistakable flavor of Hongzi's message. At any rate, before the sudden or after, it doesn't matter one iota in that recognizing adaption to the time is identical in terms of the application of potential. As such, enlightening activity does not depend on sudden realization. Chopping wood and gathering water is the perennial constant. All people are the same in this regard. ed note: failed to even out typographical spacing in the last few paragraphs for some reason~ pooh!

The secret brilliance of one's transcendent nature is an inherently robust and rustic capacity for impersonal acceptance of the impersonal reality of things consistent with karmically generative formal multiplicity. Unity isn't just the perspective of the absolute. But paying lip-service to reasonable and logical notions of Universal Good is just a matter of intellectualism. The power of inherent buddha-nature is literally your own eyes right now. It is a pity that people cannot wake up. Eternity is just this fathomless multiplicity in a word, in a thing, in a lifetime, in a universe. It is fascinating, but so what? The secret of one's inherent transcendent nature is awakening to reality as the authentically complete acceptance of what is as is regardless of circumstances. This does not admit of fascination rooted in the particular nor the vastness of space. Fascination in one is fascination in the totality. Why? There is no end to the one fascinated nor the one fascinating. They are the same. Ultimately, there is nothing to differentiate between self and other. Acceptance of the one is acceptance of totality. It's already you. There is no need to linger in fascinations comprising the nature and situational manifestations constituting eternity. This is the seductive quality of the killing energy of the karmic matrix. One's narcissistic relationship with its creative multiplicity cannot be rationalized romantically and emotionally as wonder because it is really paralyzing numbness compounding moment by moment. When you see reality as yourself objectively, impersonally, you transcend both at once. There is no way to transcend one or the other since both are the essential manifestation of Suchness. So it makes sense that subsequent to seeing reality, there is nothing to linger on. If you consider yourself awakened and you still find yourself lingering on phenomena, it would do well to reconsider your assessment of the nature of self-awakening. The habit of lusting after glinting potential in objects is the lure of one's own residual killing energy no different than the nature of creative evolution. No one has lost their aptitude for applying their tiger-eyes, but how many of us have the effective use of our buddha-eyes? This is due to acquired energy. Acquired energy IS our tiger-eyes. Arriving on the path of prior illuminates in actuality is in looking back to observe the aftermath of stepping over the whole of eternity. It's the description of presence being where you're at beyond the influence of karmic fascinations. Eternity is creation, not your nature. Seeing reality is the perspective of Unity perpetually awaiting the timing of evolution. Yes, this is the path of prior illuminates where the nature of the gradual has transformed from effort reversing the flow of going along to a spontaneous perpetual acceptance of the incipient upwelling at the pivot of awareness: this is the aperture of the Mysterious Female. It's not a place relative to anything. Aperture is a codeword for the perspective characteristic of the nature of its seeing. Its seeing is characteristic of Unity: mysterious/yang; female/yin. In stepping over eternity one assumes the characteristic of unified awareness. It does not depend on sudden enlightenment. In other words, the function of enlightening being is not dependent on awakening to its essential nature, which is already as it is. Even awakening isn't dependent on anything; it is just one's reaching a tipping-point in aggregating the critical mass of potential severing the root of the karmic compulsion to act. Your nature is the nature of awareness, which is not created. That which is not created comprises the path of prior illuminates having stepped over the whole of eternity. Eternity is about 100mm wide~ the distance between your own two eyes; it's just a trickle, really. REALLY. Just step over it. Ok, yes, easy to say, hard to do. But it is first necessary to see it as it is. In order to do that, one must be able to see reality in the first place. How? This is made possible by the breadth of the secret brilliance of one's transcendent nature being the inherently robust and rustic capacity for impersonal acceptance of the impersonal reality of things consistent with karmically generative formal multiplicity. It's already you, right now— forget it already— just be done with it for all time!! Be done with fascinations forever glinting in the unfathomable depth trickling at the juxtaposition of the end of the road of universal acceptance and the timing of letting go. When you yourself become the crossroads of before, after, acceptance and release presently and perpetually arising at its creative incipience, your perspective is the impersonal subtle observation witnessing the spark of the totality of fascination by virtue of each situation in its time without attachments. The taoist alchemical term, stealing potential, is witnessing this spark, over and over and over in actual everyday ordinary situations. This is not wonderful at all— it's just stepping over eternity— stepping over it means you do not entertain personal speculation in its multifarious permutations. In stepping over eternity, you have gathered the polluted unrefined elixir. Seal this away in secrecy void of intellectualism and rumination. This is the visage of the all-at-once perpetually in the midst of the gradual, embodied as the function of your own enlightening being. Don't make the mistake of thinking you do this. It is simply a matter of witnessing your having passed through a situational evolution that has no power to touch you. When the time arrives, it is not a matter of coming or going, movement or stillness. "Passing through" is just a figure of speech. When it arrives, there is already nothing left. Actually, in terms of arrival, the Unborn is refreshed. This is the spiritual power of one's subtle operation transcending yin and yang in terms of created cycles of karmic evolution. It is simply a matter of seeing the nature of sameness. As I said above, there is no end to the one fascinated nor to fascination itself. They are the same in terms of creation, which reflects eternity, not immortality. Ultimately, there is nothing to differentiate between self and other. If one can accept the totality (of creation) within nondifferentiation (the nonpsychological), "stealing potential" becomes the spontaneous transformation of energy from its subsequent state to its primal state within you in terms of your functional abiding in the nature of selfless Unity within the evolution of times, places, situations and events. Spiritual alchemy is just a label for no mean feat. Inconceivability is our nature. Humans being is inconceivable, but conditioning dumbs it down. By necessity, it requires work to awaken to our true self. It's a matter of seeing things as potential by not having complacent opportunistic relationships with potential as things. Ceasing to see things as objects of opportunism reverts things to potential. Not-doing in terms of potential saves energy (unrefined elixir, alchemy speaking). Energy saved as such is naturally transformed without effort (or knowledge). In taoist terms, properly transformed energy is refined elixir. Refined elixir is potential having been stolen from the Creative and restored to the Primal. This is the Real. The Creative is the storehouse of fascination, not reality. This is all accomplished by seeing potential and not doing anything with it to refine the self as opposed to seeing things to exploit (or reject) to gratify the person. Seeing is seeing before the first thought. I'm sorry if it sounds like spiritual mumbo-jumbo, but it's just how it is and no one knows why. If you know the way it really is, then (before the first thought) you partake of the transcendent nature of the real in the knowledge that there is nothing at all to know. And that is why you do not entertain fascinations: since there is, in fact, nothing to know, why on earth act in complicity with fascinations in the first place?!! poofs! Suddenly, it appears as it ever was, whatever it was …amounting to nothing. This is called going through endless transformations, planting lotuses in fire, entering the tao in reality. Just step over in one stride and abide in the illuminated as you were without beginning. Until this attainment is re-enacted for all eternity and becomes the perpetual alternation of one's practice, how can one be said to be free of mundanity while in its midst? The strange has no power over the August Way of perpetually refreshing primal Mind. That fact is not good or bad. Even so, it is by virtue of the formation of the strange that the August is manifest formlessly by the subtlety of enlightening observation. Seeing this is made possible by not tarrying over fascinations of the formal. Seeing reality as it is without attachment to objects, people, situations and events is dispensing with fascinations relative to the formal. Again, until this attainment is re-enacted for all eternity and becomes the perpetual alternation of one's practice, how can one be said to be free of mundanity while in its midst? Clearly, it is in fascination with the spark of strangenesses that one becomes enamored of bondage with its nature, which is karmic. See this sickness for what it is and wake up to its killing energy. Once you wake up to reality, and maintain a consistency of subtle observation over the aperture of awareness for a long, long time, you will find that the allure of the strange has no power over the August Way of perpetually refreshing primal Mind. What makes things seem strange and alluring is that personal ignorance of the essential nature of reality, which is neither different nor the same. Just this is already your nature. So it won't do to enact complicity with mundane fascination to personally create entanglements with objects, people, situations and events where they never existed to begin with.

I wanted to experiment with DPT ever since Leo introduced this psychedelic. I finally got my opportunity, and let me tell you how amazing this substance is! I tripped many times with 5-meo in the past. I have spiritual practices in place and a pretty healthy psyche overall. Trying DPT felt like a natural next step. I've done 4 trips so far, at 20, 30, 50 and 70 mg, all plugged. As soon as the effects started to come up, I immediately recognize a very familiar sensation to 5-meo. My consciousness has been amplified up by a factor of 1000. A warm blanket of love came over me, and I've melted into blissfulness. I wanted to come back there ever since I took 5-meo. My consciousness became very lucid, and it was easy to see it for what it is! All the thoughts, emotions, sensations and objects are simply consciousness in disguise. The seriousness of life became laughable, as though my life story was just a play of visuals in emptiness. I went through instances of my entire life and saw them as manifestations of awareness. My existence became very impersonal. I wasn't the experiencer anymore, I was the canvas and the paint itself. It was so beautiful and joyous. Here is my perspective on how DPT and 5-MeO compare: The higher dosage of DPT made it a tad more difficult to dissolve in water. More water was required and I ended up with a larger volume, not a big issue. DPT has a stronger body aspect to it. It feels very much like a detox for the body and the mind. At the onset, I had slight nausea and a sensation of buzz in my head. Throughout the trip, I often felt like vibrating. It was quite pleasant, especially with The Psychedelic Muse playing softly in the background. I tripped on an empty stomach, so the nausea was manageable as well. DPT left me in the body, while 5-MeO, especially on breakthroughs, completely blasted me out of this world. On DPT, I could function and felt present and aware. It was slow and mellow, as opposed to 5-MeO, which hits you like lighting and leaves you drooling on the bed in a fetal position. DPT is excellent for contemplation. Insights were bombarding me all the time. My mind was on steroids, penetrating every aspect of my life, past and future. I was also able to connect deeply with Leo's teaching. Love and consciousness immediately came up as the highest virtue in life. There is absolutely nothing that comes close to Love. My compassion for myself, and everyone, was enormous. Tears started rolling down my face when I realized how much people are disconnected from this. DPT trips are much longer than 5-MeO. I was surprised by how long this state of consciousness lasted. It also felt like time slowed down. My mind was actively cycling through insights, while my body was vibrating and exploding with energy. As you can imagine, after 2-hours of this, it became a bit exhausting . But afterwards, I felt so refreshed, as though I did a week of non-stop meditation. Insights from 5-meo arose only at the come-down, which was short-lasting, but with DPT they kept coming for hours. Overall, it was positive and therapeutic. The love and joy I felt were beyond even the deepest orgasm. I think breaking through on 5-meo altered my psychedelic experiences. My very first 5-meo trips were a total nightmare, but all the consecutive ones were pleasant. It's was definitely worth getting to this point. I'm extremely lucky and grateful to have these experiences.

Not sure I follow.... I think you got the wrong idea about the impersonal life. In fact any idea about it is guaranteed to be wrong.

I love things being impersonal, you know what I'm sayin, I love things being impersonal, and if loving things being impersonal is wrong, I Don't Want to Be Right!!

These feelings/emotions can arise but the difference is there no longer arising for someone. There's no longer a self-centered energy taking ownership. The need for things to go a certain way ends or the resistance to the current situation ends. The stickiness of the self is gone so nothing is held onto. Emotions and feelings become like clouds, they arise pass by, sometimes they linger for a bit but eventually dissipate. And it's a recognized they were never your clouds. Everything is an impersonal happening ❤

The metaphysical hindu worldview stands on the concept of "Brahman" which is the essence of existence. this concept points to the "transcendental absolute reality " which is "impersonal" and "neutral" .. "the first essence" from which everything conceived, conceivable and inconceivable emerged from. Brahman can't be defined in terms of "what it is".. Only in terms of "what it is NOT". So we can't give it any positive qualities.. Only negative ones.. Such as "infinite" =NOT finite.. Unchanged.. Uneffected.. Unmoved..etc. This infinite absolute has another facet to it "Maya" .. Which is the illusory unsubstantial.. Ever- changing phenomenal appearance which are like waves on the still water. Or like images on the screen of eternity (Brahman). As a self you are "Atman " which means "soul" or "spirit". Your soul or spirit which is who you really are is beyond this world of "Maya" . To be liberated or to attain liberation "moksha" you have to know your true self.. So liberation is simply the knowledge of your self.. "Atma jnana" which is to know that your essence or subjective self "Atman" is identical to the essence of all of existence and the objective self "Brahman".

@DrewNows Illness isn't anyone's fault. Trees get sick and die sometimes. They don't hold limiting beliefs. Sometimes insects and diseases move in and mass groups of them die. They rot and other trees grow in their place in the light. I try to play the illness avoidance game intellectually the best I can, psychologically, I know that the deepest truth is that all is accepted as an impersonal circle of life. There's a distinction between external action, washing hands, wearing masks, vaccines, etc, and internally worrying about avoiding something.

The only conclusion I can come to is that suffering is superfluous in the eyes of God. To what kind of God is suffering considered a byproduct of experience that doesn't take the preference experiencer into account? 1) an impersonal God that does not differentiate between types of experience i.e the only thing that exists is capital L Love and the flavour doesn't matter. 2) a God that is playing some higher dimensional game or entertainment experience like reading a book or playing a video game. Of course your life has suffering, just like the greatest stories told. Sunshine and roses is boring.

@Leo Gura But who is the God “seeing” hitler’s life to begin with, if this God is impersonal? I know im prolly just confused but its so surreal that something impersonal “chooses” to be a person. That must means the impersonal lies at a deeper level than the personal. But also the impersonal is equal to to the personal, because how else could it be a person in the first place. Trippy. At least it feels forgiving, As for the shit that ive done in my life, to know that it was ultimately a selfless decision by God.

Spirits with negative polarities aka demons feed on your attention. So reasoning with them is only giving them more power, because you are still playing their game, they are still tricking you into GIVING your attention to them. They cannot posses you, they can only trick you into letting them posses you. Ego, like anything, has levels of complexity - gross and subtle aspects to it. Essentially, every "i" thought is ego, and you can't avoid having "i" thoughts as long as your body is alive, because at some point, "i" will have to eat, shit, drink, piss etc. Of course there are i thoughts that distract you from love, and that is what spirituality conventionally calls ego, and you can still have i thoughts being completely dis-identified with them - that's a "healthy", or awake ego - but when you are in that state, the boundary between the ego and everything else dissolves - you are aware of your Self, which is Presence/Love/God/Emptiness/Everything/Truth/Infinity, the you that doesn't change etc. So what you can actually DO is LOVE them. LOVE EVERYTHING! Negatively polarized beings cannot stand love, that's how they have to be in order to remain negatively polarized - so just love, love, love! And Loving kinda comes together with selflessness - you stop making the whole situation about you, and you actually make it about others - in this case, it's about helping those so called "demons" accept love (because they will have to sooner or later) - and the way you do that is through surrender - by actually having the attitude of "ok, i accept you staying as long as you like! If God accepts you being here, then i accept you too! I LOVE YOU!" But you really have to mean it authentically, and that can be tricky - because they will leave if you do that, but you can't do it while still wishing them to leave. You must learn to truly accept them - this means accepting the possibility of your insanity, and that relaxes you, because you can then stop that desperate trying to figure out if you actually are insane or not (because that's what you're actually doing, and that is the insanity, you are asking yourself if you are insane or not) and making things more impersonal, explaining things through demons and angels and shit can be helpful. But it's you, everything is you. There is nothing that isn't you. I'll give you one last point that helped me a lot, and that is recognizing that no THING, as unpleasant as it may be, doesn't block my awareness. No thing can stop me from being aware of the Presence that IT is happening in. On the contrary, EVERY THING can be used as proof of Presence, because no thing can be Present without Presence (does that make sense?) So if your Self is Presence itself, then it doesn't matter ego or no ego, demon or angel, they are all a celebration of the Presence that pervades and precedes them all. So move your attention on the fact that you are aware of something, not on the something itself. What you are can NEVER appear.

Hello! Thank you for dropping by I appreciate very much that you could relate with this. Yeah, weirdly impersonal is a very good way to describe it. I find even the personal stuff somehow gets weirdly impersonal in such a situation. It is like one is not relating directly towards each other in a way, or maybe only on an intellectual level, but the body and heart is closed off, even if there is a lot of attraction. I think people can be very good at getting as close as they can possibly get without risking anything - I'm probably like that as well in many situations.

@Amit Birth Chart This birth chart report shows the positions of the planets for Amit. The Sun The Sun represents vitality, a sense of individuality, and outward-shining creative energy. The Sun is in Leo There's an unmistakably regal air to Solar Leos. These are dignified--even noble--folk. Leos have a reputation for being conceited, but think again. Leos do feel important, but this generally takes the form of wanting to change the world in some way--to make the world a better place. They are generally motivated by affection for people, and often have big dreams and plans to make people happy. Generally, Leos are hard-working. After all, they are attracted to the good things in life, and they know they have to work to get them. It is sometimes difficult to imagine Leos as go-getters if you happen to catch them in one of their languid moods. These people can sleep in, laze around, and luxuriate for long periods of time. However, when they do get to work, they do it with intensity and determination. In this way, they are not unlike their symbol, the lion. The worst thing you can do to a Leo is accuse them of bad intentions. Displaying behavior that makes them think you don't appreciate them runs a close second. These happy, jovial people become mighty hurt when others don't see them for their noble intentions. Loyal, and sometimes rather traditional, Leos are, after all, a fixed sign. They'll hold on to situations and people for a very long time before they give up. There is an unmistakable idealism to Leo's view of the world and the people in it. Often, Leos have a very noble inner code that they answer to. Although on the surface, Leos appear rather confident, they can actually be some of the most humble souls around. They are the first to blame themselves when something goes wrong. Once again, it's the Leonine self-importance at work, and this characteristic works in unexpected ways. Instead of being the conceited, self-absorbed show-offs of reputation, they are usually very self-aware, self-conscious, and, yes, even humble. Short description: He is masterful, he likes authority, he aspires toward an ideal. He likes to give advice. He is honest, frank, loyal, open, and sincere. Possible issues: pride, vanity, arrogance, presumption and disdain for others.. Leo with ascendant Virgo Sun in XI: The Sun is in the eleventh house You are a humanitarian who aims to treat everyone as equals. You seek to be unique and original, and you do your best to avoid bias and prejudice. Social status is less important to you than belonging to a group of diverse personalities. Your identity, in fact, is somehow linked to a larger unit than yourself. You have high hopes and goals, and tend to look at life in terms of opportunities. You have magnetic appeal, as people sense your broad tolerance and openness. The friendships you establish are crucial to your development. If you identify too much with your friendships and your friendliness, you may become too impersonal and alienate those who would like to get close to you. Successful career thanks to support of patrons, friends or relations. You are a leader in groups and people look up to you. -39 Square between the Sun and Moon You have an internal struggle between your needs and your wants. You can lack focus and be indecisive as a result. Your ability to be objective is both an asset and a liability, simply because when you decide on one route, you are pulled in another direction at the same time. Something tugs at you, and you begin to question your stance. "But what if..." and "on the other hand..." are statements you can't help but make, and that might plague you. You are always aware of the opposing point of view and the other side of the coin. -70 Square between the Sun and Pluto You may be prone to inner tension and negative, self-destructive behavior. When things are going well, you suffer from fears that something will come along to change that. Constantly worrying that the rug will be pulled from under your feet can easily become a self-fulfilling prophecy. You possess tremendous power and strength--when you learn to accept and use that strength, instead of fear it, you can be one of the most effective, insightful, helpful, and healing person around! At times, you can be intensely dissatisfied with your personal accomplishments and expressions of self. You put a lot of pressure on yourself regarding your own endeavors. You can be quite dissatisfied with your creative self-expressions, and want to hide your expressions from others until you feel the output is "right". This is largely due to a perceived inability to express or reveal your true personality to others. You struggle with a deep need to control yourself and life itself. You are especially sensitive to criticism, and feel the need to "redo" yourself often. There is a marked fear of losing control, and this might stem from some traumatic event in childhood, or the childhood might have been crisis-ridden or emotionally-charged in general. As such, you can be intensely fearful of, or threatened by, change. This can express itself through attempts to control your life in such a way that you can manage your fears of being taken off guard. Of course, this generally backfires! You have an intense need for privacy at times. 256 Sextile between the Sun and Midheaven He knows what he wants on a professional level; is aware of his objectives and will do everything to achieve them; he'll usually carry out plans to the very end. He has a good job as well as a good reputation. The Moon The Moon represents the emotional responses, unconscious pre-destination, and the self-image. The Moon represents the emotions, and the Moon sign shows how a person expresses themselves when at home, at ease, and comfortable. The Moon is in Taurus Familiarity is important to Lunar Taureans. These people are earthy and strong-willed. They feel with their senses and they are pretty much rooted in their ways. They revel in material comforts--in fact, building a solid and comfortable home and foundation helps to keep them feeling safe and content. It isn't wise to try to push Lunar Taureans into doing anything, but once they have made a commitment, they're persevering. There's a steadiness to this position of the Moon that is comforting to those close to them. But the conservative streak in these natives can be maddening to more progressive personalities. They tend to go out of their way to avoid "messy" or unpredictable situations, crises, and emotional displays. Instead, they focus on creating a reliable and secure life around them. In relationships, Lunar Taureans may not easily recognize their partner's need for change, growth, or emotional stimulation. Moon in Taurus natives are generally very romantic. Their affections are strong, deep, and unwavering. They are sentimental and warm. Since Taurus is a practical earth sign, the placement of the Moon in this sign suggests an ability to protect themselves and their own interests. They will rarely make a move without first determining that it is safe and that there's something in it for them. Generally, Taurus Moon people have reliable instincts. They are very much tied to the physical world, and they often have a particularly well-developed sense of smell. Relationships with people born with this position of the Moon are often quite enduring. Many Moon in Taurus people hang onto their mates, even in the face of serious conflict. Taurus is a fixed sign, so break-ups don't happen easily. There is a serenity to them that is calming. In fact, it takes a lot to really get to them. However, they do get off-center every once in a while. They are not the most adaptable people when their own routine is interrupted, for example. Though some Lunar Taureans might be considered anal, most simply have a stubborn streak that keeps them rather resistant to change. Rarely are they spontaneous sorts. Uncomfortable with surprises, these natives value stability. Their needs are strong but quite simple at the same time--they love the "good things" in life. The world of the five senses is all-important to these natives. Their love of stability and steadiness can make them slaves to routine. However, they are loyal and capable people. Short description: Sweetness itself. Convinced of their ideas and strong-willed. He is foresighted and willful. He knows how to trust. He appreciates all the good things in life. He appreciates and protects Nature. Possible issues: excesses in pleasure, laziness, sensuality, thoughtlessness. Moon in IX: The Moon is in the ninth house He is highly imaginative. Prolonged studies, intuitive. Professionally successful abroad, in import-export or as a diplomat. Contact with foreigners. Long journeys. Ability to learn foreign languages. This is a position that can indicate a deep longing for stimulation above and beyond the everyday, mundane routine. You are a philosophical sort, interested and curious about the world, other people, and perhaps different cultures. You can be extremely restless and discontented if you don't have a definite goal in mind. You might find yourself longing to be somewhere else when you are unhappy, imagining that if you were to move or travel, you would be much happier. However, this attitude can only keep you from enjoying and improving upon the situation you are now in, only serving to make you feel more unhappy in the present and with your current circumstances. Trying to avoid the attitude that "the grass is greener on the other side" will be important, while attending to your needs to get away from time to time will help scratch the seemingly incurable itch for something more. 59 Trine between the Moon and Mars You are a passionate person who loves life. Although your emotions are powerful and immediate, your passion is generally controlled and directed. You are a sexual person who nevertheless doesn't get too carried away or controlled by your passions. Because your emotions are strong and you know how to channel them into constructive channels, you don't easily understand such things as "crimes of passion", impulsive behaviors, or emotional excitability in others. You're generally open, accepting, and natural in your sexual expression. You need an emotional connection in order to feel complete on a physical level. You may have an affection and talent for sports, but other factors in the natal chart are necessary to provide the motivation and commitment. Short description: He is frank, honest, full of vigor and ambition. He is strong-willed and powerful at work. He is a little hard on himself but perhaps more on others whose capacity for action is not as great or inherent. -94 Square between the Moon and Saturn When the Moon is in hard aspect to Saturn in the natal chart, natives need to learn to trust others more. Fear keeps them from fully enjoying personal relationships, and fear is behind the occasional rigidity that they express. When they let themselves receive nurture or care from others, an inner voice cautions them that it might not be sincere, long-lasting, or enough! There can be some reluctance about becoming a parent, but once taken on, these people don't take their responsibility lightly. Emotional reticence is the main theme of these aspects. Many people with this aspect had a lot of conditions placed on the love they received in early childhood. They tend to expect the same later in life. With hard Saturn aspects, individuals are often plagued with doubts, not only about the self but about what to expect from life itself. The problem is that expecting difficulties or negative situations creates an aura around them that perpetuates the problem. They must work hard at positive thinking and expecting more from life. Ironically, many people with hard Saturn aspects can be quite sarcastic, skeptical, and rigid in manner. This is essentially a defense mechanism designed to protect themselves from harshness in the world. It is extremely likely that they feel neglected because they perceive it in the first place, and later expect it, to be the case. There's a vicious circle going on here that can only be broken when the patterns created by negative conditioning are broken. Adjusting one's perceptions and expectations is the key to breaking out of these negative patterns. Otherwise, natives of hard Moon-Saturn aspects will live life feeling left out--attracting circumstances that perpetuate a feeling of deep unhappiness and dissatisfaction. Short description: He has changeable moods, a reserved character, can be stubborn and may lack assurance. His relationship with a guardian may have been difficult or a challenging early family life in some cases. 63 Trine between the Moon and Uranus He is imaginative and benefits from the Moon's intuition complemented by Uranus' independence and originality. His life is out-of-the-ordinary, with lots of changes and a great knowledge of the world not necessarily through reading but through personal experience and brilliant intuition. He likes the sensational, new things. He acts instinctively, but fortunately has a good sixth sense. He likes to be surrounded by original people, artists. 57 Trine between the Moon and Neptune Positive aspect: He is kind and sympathetic, with a strongly compassionate nature. When in love, he is usually very devoted. In fact, he is devoted by nature, not only in matters of the heart. There is an unmistakably compassionate and understanding side to his nature. He has a natural affinity to music. While everyone enjoys music, people with Moon in harmonious aspect to Neptune respond to music as a vehicle to heal, relax, and to uplift the soul. Naturally perceptive, without even trying he tunes into the feelings of others, and the mood of his surroundings. There is a distinct emotional need to escape into the world of imagination, and to withdraw from others at times when he needs to re-center himself, largely because he tends to "take in" a lot of mixed energies from his surroundings. Strong and sudden "feelings" and hunches can overcome him. More often than not, his intuition is correct, although his imagination is also powerful and he can read too much into a situation as a result. Some laziness is associated with this position. This stems from a natural timidity and sensitivity that is apparent from youth. He may have been labeled "shy" in youth, and family members or friends may have jumped in to "save" him from situations that required boldness or aggressiveness. Thus, passivity was accepted and, as adults, he may be less experienced than most when it comes to reaching out or going after what he wants. -344 Opposition between the Moon and Pluto He has intense emotions and passionate feelings. He fear the loss of control of emotional and domestic matters, and can fear change, upheaval, being caught unawares, having the rug pulled from beneath his feet. At the same time, he attracts change and disruptions. The love life may be riddled with emotional scenes, jealousy, and possessiveness because he attracts intense partners. There can also be big expectations of a partner or partnership. 33 Trine between the Moon and Ascendant He has a good influence on the family, and the family usually gives back, loving and helping in return. He likes travelling, movement, change. He likes contact. open to other people. Very sensitive, observant, adaptable, likable, and somewhat of a chameleon. Mercury Mercury represents communication, Cartesian and logical spirit. Mercury is in Leo He wants to know the bottom line, and can be good at scoping out a situation and finding answers to problems. In fact, he is a problem-solver, and will spend a lot of time helping others solve problems if need be. Very friendly and usually positive, he can be charming in a warm way. Enthusiastic speaker, speaks with authority and sincerity. Great sense of organization. Playful. Likes to take risks in jest and for amusement. Might sometimes come across too strongly or offend sensitive folk with a somewhat authoritative tone. Mercury in XI: Mercury is in the eleventh house He has lots of friends. He likes intelligent, cultivated people around him with whom he can enjoy verbal sparring. He likes debates, interminable discussions. Often has friends who are younger, or friends come and go. You are endlessly curious about people, group interactions, community affairs, trends, and teams. You are attracted to people who bring new ideas into your experience, and who have something novel to contribute on an intellectual level. You are very forward-looking and fair-minded. Fair play, impartiality, and unselfishness are important ideals for you. There can be many changes or fluctuations in your personal wishes, dreams, plans, and ideals. You might attract friends who come and go, or who are dishonest or duplicitous. 173 Sextile between Mercury - Mars He likes discussions, debates, polemic. He has good judgment and can be very determined. He is a worker and has lots of energy. He has a lively intelligence and usually goes to the heart of things. He is enthusiastic, incisive, and energetic in thought and speech. 60 Trine between Mercury - Lilith Can be provocative in speech or communications, persuasive, interesting conversationalist, quick to see the flaws of a situation. Venus Venus represents an interest in emotions and values, exchange, and sharing with others. Venus is in Cancer Love for Venus in Cancer is best when it is committed and rather predictable. These people are sensitive in love, even if their Sun sign is the more playful and outgoing signs of Gemini or Leo. You may even say their egos are a little underdeveloped when it comes to love, but they have a lot to give in return: namely, security, comfort, and care. Venus in Cancer people show their love by caring for you. They pay more attention to your feelings than your words, and observe you rather carefully. They want a safe, solid relationship. They can be a little moody in love, and some go so far as giving silent treatments and engaging in pouting routines to get attention from their mate. They are turned off by anything too impersonal, and too much rationalizing leaves them cold. They are not afraid of emotional confrontations (even if they have a Gemini Sun and appear flighty in other areas of life). Still, these lovers are always worried they'll be left high and dry. If you've hurt them, they'll have a hard time forgetting. Every so often, they'll retreat into themselves (not unlike a Crab), and it can be difficult to pull them out. This is when they use their extraordinary "nursing" abilities on themselves, instead of you...and you simply don't want that! Pleasing Venus in Cancer involves lots of snuggling and sentimentality. Recognize their attachments to their family and home. Help them to feel confident with you -- when they are fearful of being rejected, they can resort to some frustrating tactics to find out just how loved they are. Think about how a crab (the symbol of Cancer) moves towards its goal, and you will get a fair idea of Venus in Cancer's approach. Do your best to make them feel secure and cared for, and you will be rewarded with a patient, dependable, and loving mate. Venus in X: Venus is in the tenth house His best years may be in the parental home and also the last years of life. That said, the rest are not unhappy, but contain certain hurdles. Love can help in the professional life; he has a gift for seduction. He likes to entertain; he likes the comfort and attractions of home life. Others tend to respect you for your charming manner, and you have many admirers, although some of these are admirers from afar, as there is an aura about you that is charming yet strangely (and intriguingly) distant. You have a great need to be recognized or admired for your charm, beauty, or loving manner, but should be careful not to become too wrapped up in what others think of you, as you might come across as phony or superficial. Some people with this position are "married" to their work or to their image. You are good at making contacts and organizing social events. -104 Square between Venus - Jupiter He is nonchalant, perhaps pretentious or self-important. He likes what is beautiful and sometimes ostentatious, perhaps spending money too quickly at times. He likes to please and can have numerous amorous adventures. He can undergo tribulations in love. May take things to excess, which sometimes interferes with a smooth flow. He is big-hearted and warm, with an open heart and a tendency to want to give a lot to the people he loves. He can have some problems with following through on his promises, however, not usually because of any ill intent, but because he sometimes overestimates his personal capabilities, wanting to do more and give more than is actually possible. He may have a tendency to live beyond his means. He needs to be cautious about the tendency to feel overly-optimistic or overly protected. Moderation is the most important, and perhaps challenging, lesson in his life. -11 Opposition between Venus - Uranus He may look for new sensations in love and might often feel unsatisfied by connections that quickly turn into purely conventional relationships. He likes novelty, adventure, the eccentric. He is frivolous, unstable, or inconstant. Marriage is not usually for him and, if he does throw himself into this adventure, it may eventually be considered a youthful mistake. There can be numerous love affairs or off-and-on relationships. There is a tendency to react spontaneously and intensely to others, and there is marked emotional impulsiveness. Perhaps his most successful relationships are unconventional ones. He may delight in defying convention. He has considerable romantic charm and humor. There can be sudden relationship status changes, and a marked inner craving for emotional excitement. -11 Opposition between Venus - Neptune He might lack self-confidence and his ideals are not always easy to achieve. In love, he is unstable and deceitful or, more likely, meets people who are like this. He is easy-going and follows others' wishes in love much of the time, and might let the partner take the initiative more often than not. This aspect indicates a suggestible romantic nature. Being "in love with love" is a strong possibility. You are naturally compassionate and are generally willing to go over the top for a loved one. It's hard to say whether your expectations in personal relationships are too high or too low. On the one hand, you tend to easily accept behaviors in your partners that others wouldn't accept, as you are compassionate and even drawn to people who others might consider trouble. On the other hand, your romantic dreams may be so powerful that you are easily disappointed with the reality of relationships. Deception in love is possible, but self-deception is even more likely. In love, you see what you want to see, rather than what is. Feelings of being used or deceived may come up. However, if a distinct pattern exists in your love life that involves you being let down, deceived or used, it will be especially worthwhile to examine whether self-deception was at work. The possibility of clinging to romantic delusions is very high with this position. For example, some with these aspects cling to a romantic notion that someone loves them when in reality that person doesn't return the affection. Or, they may cling to a romance that has lost all hope. Another possibility is devoting their love to someone who is unattainable or who is unable to commit. Yet another Venus-Neptune scenario is loving someone who treats them badly, all the while clinging to an idealized image of the partner. No matter what the scenario, romantic yearning and longing, as well as delusion, tends to be the theme. The expectation here is that loving someone requires self-sacrifice. The result is an attraction to relationships that are co-dependent and even abusive. Venus-Neptune people are drawn to victim/savior relationships, and they can play either the role of victim or savior! Dependency or neediness in a partner can be confused for love. In an attempt to love unconditionally, you may too readily sacrifice your own needs and eventually feel used. Mars Mars represents the desire for action and physical energy. Mars is in Virgo These productive and busy people are goal-oriented, practical people. Although they can be a little scattered at times, simply because they are doing so many things at any give time, Mars in Virgo natives get things done--quite well! They have a knack for handling a wide variety of tasks at once, and a tendency to take on perhaps too much at the same time. Most Mars in Virgo natives are not particularly aggressive by nature. Although they can be a little hard-nosed and critical at times, they rarely resort to pushing others around. Still, an annoyed Mars in Virgo native can be difficult to be around! Arouse their anger and they turn into complaining, over-critical nags. Generally, these natives don't make themselves nuisances, so this stage is unlikely to last for very long. It is a sensitive position, however. It doesn't take much to make these people nervous. Mars in Virgo people are quite protective about their "system" for getting things done. Although rather humble in a general life sense, they can be quite particular about their methods--how they organize and accomplish their goals, mostly with work. Theirs is a nervous energy. Although they have some staying power, they can be restless and are not given to sticking with the same projects for too long. These natives derive plenty of energy and life force from the things they do--their work, hobbies, and any kind of projects they take on. An idle Mars in Virgo native is a sorry sight, indeed. Fidgety, nervous, worried...all of these things are a sure sign that Mars in Virgo people have either too little to do, or far too much on their plates. There is a perfectionist at the heart of all people with this position. They'll be the first to deny this, but it's there! They worry when they are not producing anything, and they worry about whether what they've produced will measure up. An earthy and sometimes nervous sexuality generally characterizes people with this position of Mars. In a sense, their performance in bed is similar to their work. These people want to be good at what they do. They will generally be open to experimentation, if only to feed their curiosity and to feel savvy. There's often a shy and humble side to Mars in Virgo in any area that involves putting themselves out there and letting go (areas ruled by Mars). But experience and knowledge are important to these natives, and this drive generally wins over their natural reticence. Mars in I: Mars is in the first house He gets carried away a lot. He is provocative, impulsive, dynamic, and bold. Great spirit of enterprise. He has a great need for activity and may throw himself into projects without thinking of the consequences or possible setbacks. His reactions to new situations are immediate and pressing. He is an active, energetic, dynamic, enterprising, and possibly even forceful or aggressive person. He tends to begin new endeavors with gusto, although follow-through is not necessarily indicated by this position alone. Some might be rash, inconsiderate, or overly assertive. He can be fiercely independent, and he is usually direct and straightforward. Spontaneity is extremely important to him. Some might stir up trouble, whether consciously or unconsciously, when he is bored. -68 Opposition between Mars - Lilith Love affairs are tempestuous with quarrels, crises, great passion after the storm. Jupiter Jupiter represents expansion and grace. Jupiter is in Libra He attracts the most good fortune when he is fair-minded, treats others with equality, bends without being a doormat, is gracious, and uses his talents at promoting and mediating. Values people and relationships, and might succeed best in partnership. Relating as equals is important to him. The arts, architecture, law, math, mediating, and politics are possible avenues for success. Use of charm and grace to reach goals. Jupiter in I: Jupiter is in the first house He is jovial, expansive, dynamic, kindly, altruistic. He has good judgment, is tolerant and loves food, good times, and pleasures. He has a good education and a prosperous life. -10 Opposition between Jupiter - Lilith He may run the risk of ruining himself in order to please his partner. On a sexual level, he may go to considerable effort to please his partner, but a partner can remain insatiable. There can be disappointments in love until moderation is practiced. 10 Trine between Jupiter - Midheaven He lives the high life, wanting to have fun but knowing what he wants and doing what is necessary to get it. He wants to - and does - succeed socially. This is a "work hard, play hard" placement. Saturn Saturn represents contraction and effort. Saturn is in Aquarius Long-term studies and, if family circumstances do not allow this, he will teach himself. He is serious and methodical in work, perhaps liking to visit the elderly and intellectuals who enrich his mind. Potential weaknesses: a sense of having bad luck and frequent disappointed hopes. Saturn in VI: Saturn is in the sixth house He is a worker, very steady in all he does. He likes precision, method. He is serious and seeks continuity at work. He can focus on a job in the medical field where he will likely be successful, as he possesses all the necessary qualities. -22 Square between Saturn - Pluto He is not always open to others' ideas, especially if they are disorganized or free-thinking. He should watch for rigid thinking and egoism. Uranus Uranus represents individual liberty, egoistic liberty. Uranus in Capricorn Can have some problems accessing his intuition, since common sense often dominates. A great battler. He has so much power that one thinks nothing can defeat him. His mission in society and in the world can mean everything to him. May question traditions and can be very open to redefining the meaning of success and to changing up traditional approaches to career and status. Uranus in V: Uranus is in the fifth house He is independent, enjoying even dubious distractions. His amorous adventures are not only numerous but also very complicated, and may lose their charm over the long term. However, with excitement and attention, love affairs have a better chance of enduring. Can be brilliantly creative; quirky sense of humor. 198 Conjunction between Uranus - Neptune He can be wildly creative with an odd but happy sense of humor and perspective. He is an idealist, easily disappointed by those using power plays to advance. 32 Sextile between Uranus - Pluto He fights to improve his daily life, he is persevering. 26 Trine between Uranus - Ascendant He is always changing, somewhat unstable. He is ready to innovate, to change everything. He is inventive. Neptune Neptune represents transcendental liberty, non-egoistic liberty. Neptune is in Capricorn He is discerning, wise, and sensible. Neptune in IV: Neptune is in the fourth house He succeeds thanks to brilliant and unusual ideas. He can be very much influenced by his mother or guardian. 22 Sextile between Neptune - Pluto He is perceptive and able to see layers to a situation. He is naturally drawn to learning what makes himself and others tick. 18 Trine between Neptune - Ascendant He can have unusual relationships. He is easily influenced, very sensitive and emotional. Pluto Pluto represents transformations, mutations, and elimination. Pluto is in Scorpio Fear of betrayal. Sensual and passionate. 2 Sextile between Pluto - Ascendant He has willpower and ambition, and almost always prefer to have his own way. Lilith Black Moon Lilith represents our darker, deeper natures that may be repressed or buried. Lilith in Aries There can be some fear of taking the lead, asserting oneself, and making executive decisions. These things need to be learned in this lifetime, and when integrated and accepted, it can be empowering. -2 Trine between Lilith - Lunar Node This aspect sometimes means a troubled sex life until he learns to feel more comfortable expressing and integrating this side of the personality. North Node-South Node The South Node represents our overdeveloped character traits. We are talented here but if we overdo this area of life or hold onto these traits to feel secure, we may stagnate. The North Node points to the qualities that we need to work on and develop to achieve inner balance and fulfillment. True North Node in Sagittarius He may limit himself unknowingly through mental overstimulation or by overdoing logic at the expense of intuition. He may have so many things going at once that he only dabbles and does notcommit to a particular project or path. His path is to tune out distractions and build faith in his intuition so that he can follow a vision. Qualities to develop: Prioritizing, commitment to a path, faith. North Node in III: North Node in the Third House He should pay more attention to his daily affairs to improve his confidence and sense of order. The desire to be free is strong, but he is likely to live in a state of chaos until he disciplines himself to be more present in his daily affairs. Taking the time to listen, learn, and organize can do wonders for his peace of mind. Qualities to develop: curiosity, willingness to learn from others. The Houses House I is the area of self identity. The ascendant is a symbol of how one acts in life. It is the image of the personality as seen by others, and the attitude that one has towards life. Leo with ascendant Virgo Ascendant is Virgo People with Virgo rising are often a little understated in their personal mannerisms and appearance, although a lot depends on the position of Mercury (the ruling planet of Virgo) in the chart. Generally, there is an intelligent and reserved aura about Virgo rising individuals that is unmistakable. These are actually somewhat shy people who need time to analyze things around them before they warm up to both situations and people. This quality can be received exactly as that, or it can be received as a rather stand-offish, cool, and even critical manner (depending on the audience). One of the biggest personality traits of this position is body-awareness. People with Virgo ascendants are sensitive to any discomfort or other signals their body gives them. Many are especially interested and concerned with physical health, and some are attracted to mind-body awareness exercises such as yoga. Virgo rising people are often rather particular about food. Although some have good appetites, there can be an unmistakable pickiness about what they put in and on their bodies. Virgo ascendant natives have a tendency to worry a lot, especially when confronted with new situations. They notice the tiniest details that others overlook. Many people with this position have a tendency to attract (or be attracted to) people who need help. Their relationships may be confusing as a result. Despite the Virgo rising tendency to appear rather collected and professional, relationships can sometimes be messy simply because these natives don't always see their partners and partnerships clearly. There's a quiet charm to many Virgo rising people. Once they have the chance to warm up to new people and situations, you'll find they have a lot to offer. They'll help you out of a jam, go out on a limb for you, and surprise you with a natural modesty under a somewhat critical and standoffish manner. House II - the second house - is the area of material security and values. It rules money and personal finances, sense of self-worth and basic values, personal possessions. Libra on House II Income may come either as a result of an advantageous marriage or union, through artistic expression and diplomatic means, or by a very useful association. Partnerships can help further financial goals. Venus by sign and house can show other areas for making money. House III - the third house - is the area of social and intellectual learning. Scorpio on House III Can make a good investigator because he is very curious, loves researching and does it with a lot of patience, enjoying solving mysteries, cracking a code. He knows how to take risks, while being wary of the dangers or consequences. House IV - the fourth house - is the area of home, family, roots, and deep emotions/sense of self-worth. Sagittarius on House IV He may very well marry a foreigner, or go to live abroad permanently and set up home there. At the least, very interested in faraway places. Or, he loves spacious and well-lit homes. House V - the fifth house - is the area of creative self-expression, romance, entertainment, children, and gambling. Capricorn on House V The absolute example of the "serious" type. Everything is calculated, the slightest risk analyzed, patience is one of his main qualities. He knows little about chance. One or two love affairs, marriage, a family, all unproblematic - done calmly with love and wisdom. House VI - the sixth house - is the area of learning by material transaction. Aquarius on House VI One of the professions or teaching. Weak point: the circulation. House VII - the seventh house - is the area of one-to-one relationships such as marriage and partnership, and of social and intellectual action. Pisces on House VII He may attract partners who need help or who are unreliable. If the condition of this house is good, it can be a warm, artistic, and compassionate union. Sometimes this points to a hasty marriage that just as quickly disappoints. The spouse's lack of energy and vitality will annoy him, and this could lead to the break-up of a union. A second, happier union is likely. House VIII - the eighth house - is the area of emotional security and of security of the soul. Aries on House VIII The spouse will tend to spend more money than he earns. Be careful of any haste that could prove dangerous. House IX - the ninth house - is the area of learning that shapes the identity. Taurus on House IX He may travel little, no great attraction for abroad. Unlikely to change principles, practically never changing the mind or beliefs. House X - the tenth house - is the area of material action. The Midheaven represents the work one will do in one's life, the place one will take in the world of society. It becomes more important as one grows older. Gemini on House X Profession requiring lots of change and movement. If this isn't the case, then lots of job changes. He likes to move, travel, write. House XI - the eleventh house - is the area of search for social and intellectual security. Cancer on House XI Sincere and life-long friendships. The family comes first, however. House XII - the twelfth house - is the area of education and of emotion. This is where we meet our karma, deal with endings, and sometimes where we bury things. Leo on House XII A few problems with authority or someone in charge.