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Do we go around chasing our arm, our eyes, the sun, night time, daytime, or anything that is already present. Anything that is inevitable or we know is there or sure is about to come, no. We're in a relaxed state about it. We don't think about our fingers unless it hurts; and we don't focus on whether or not daylight will show up in the morning, we go to sleep knowing the sun will rise whether it's a cloudy day or not. All these things have been neutralized within our awareness and have collapsed back into oneness. When nighttime appears within our awareness it's already perceived that daytime will follow. When daytime arises, nighttime collapses back from whence it came, back into nothingness. We don't ask where the hell did daytime go and go chasing for it, we are at peace knowing it will show up. That anxious feeling isn't arising. We're at peace with all those sorts of things. Knowing our arms are on our bodies, our eyes are there, the sky is there and that our hearts are beating. This is how things become one with the Universe. That trigger energy didn't disappear, it collapsed and blended in with the flow. So did the happy energy. We feel happiness for 5mins then the happiness blends itself and become one again. So does every emotion. They arise and subside within our awareness. They are still potentially there; but until there's focus and attention, they lie dormant. Happiness, joy, excitement etc, gives us such a dopamine hit that the mind doesn't want to let go of that feeling. We chase happiness because we're unsure. Unsure of it's existence. We need to see it to feel alive. Even sadness. We need these emotions to come out of their non-dual state for us to know we exist. If not, we'll feel dead inside. We will feel that nothingness. We don't want to feel like nothing; and because happiness is the feel good state, we chase it around like a cat chases a mouse. We need to feel alive. We also chase other emotions and feelings, but I'm concentrating on happiness here even though this goes for every emotion. Happiness has to collapse back into the flow of oneness because that's it's nature. It cannot be otherwise. We don't understand this, so we chase it down. It keeps coming back up, but not for long as it's a very short-lived sensation. Depression is happiness turned in unto itself. Picture an umbilical cord trapped and cannot free itself. Stopping happiness in it's tracks from birthing itself. These energies are free but the mind enslaves them. When the mind liberates itself and welcomes all these energies to flow and collapse as they are designed to do because of the Absolute nature of the Universal flow, then they're not trapped within the body. We chase after happiness because sadness is trapped within the body so is anxiety, confusion, anger, fear, jealousy, etc. All these emotions makes us feel contracted and constricted. So, we chase after what we believe will loosen them up, not realizing that they'll just surface again once the happy energy subsides. Ever notice happiness doesn't create a problem for us. It's because this energy is welcomed and shown love. We don't reject or hate it. It comes and goes more freely than the other ones we associate negativity with. Those one's get more attention and focus so awareness stays within this side of consciousness. They feel more intense. Anger feels more intense than happiness because of the attention we give it. We don't usually consciously chase anger because it doesn't feel good, but we are still chasing it in the silent pursuit for happiness. We will search out things and circumstances that makes us feel upset and bothered because that happiness dopamine hit wears off too quickly. Either way we're chasing emotions to make us feel something - something rather than nothing.

The nothingness is nothing, is a way to talk , there is only you, the reality, what exist Nothingness is a realization that appears in meditation when the form dissapears, then the reality appears as absolute void, then you realize that even there is no form, always is you, the being, the absolute potential. That's existence.

Which is the 'you' that you say that is always permeating nothingness? So there are two things: You and Nothingness? Haven´t you consider the possibility you are actually the nothingness? 😉 Therefore, Nothing has the quality that it has no quality, no manifestation and non existence.

Non-existence does not exist because you are always permeating nothingness to the last corner (metaphorical) of infinity, since you are infinite. not finite, not end. never. you are, that's it. reality is, now, and now is always, now is what exists, the time, before and after, and in the now, are appearances. you can understand exactly why you are always, its obvious, its because there are no limits, then you are, and you are total, everything. it's absolutely impossible that it isn't, because there are no limits. you are unlimited. Its not something mysterious os alien, its you, now.

Pure non-existence is not so pure. Even when this fractal spiral of dreams within dreams is transcended and pure empty being or para-being, empty para-consciousness is left alone without any content I wouldn’t call pure non- existence. Non-existence of content - yes, why not, but non-existence as pure nothingness is just a concept. Even if you dissolve your egoic multilevel structure and there’s no experience of anything left, the awareness of pure being remains. And this primordial awareness is not en experience of course. So, I would be careful with such claims as non-existence. Pure non-existence cannot exist by elementary logic.

The ego or separate self is always trying to extract something from reality. But it’s made of the same nothingness as reality. It’s as if one part of the ocean was trying to extract another part of the ocean to keep for itself. Nothing trying to extract nothing from nothing. It’s hopeless. TurtlePee 2024

Presence literally heals the mind and the body by just being with whatever needs to be healed and dissolves it into nothingness from which that pain came. Feels like it fixes the flow of energy in the body.

The problem is its not answerable there are people who have experienced it but its not something that can be answered its before anything you have ever experienced. We aren't concluding we are witnessing it. The void of nothingness is right in front of you there's just stuff in it right now. Anything we do will just be logic and this logic is based around this nothing we are talking about. If you see it words mean nothing, if you don't you will be looking for something in the words that's not there.

Void, emptiness, Nothingness. İt is like an air but it has no molecules therefore it is within everything. Therefore, it is nothing and everything at the same time.

Even if we say that everything originates from ‘nothing,’ the fact remains that we are still experiencing something: awareness, thoughts, emotions, and that experience is real to us in the moment. To me, the fact that we can think, feel, and be aware points to something more than just a void. Even if these things come from a source that seems unknowable or not tangible, they still exist as experiences within our consciousness. So, while nothingness may be the origin of everything, our awareness of it still exists as something we experience and cannot deny, even if we can’t fully explain it. It’s like saying that we can’t understand where consciousness comes from, but we cannot deny that we are conscious and experiencing.

“Man's chief delusion is his conviction that there are causes other than his own state of consciousness.” Neville Goddard. Consciousness really loves to have fun with itself. It doesn't develop in the womb You are imagining your parents and your birth just like you are now. Dreaming is fun No? You are that for which it defines its own self. I am in you and you in me, mutual in divine love. Of course, you love everything because you are everything, everything is yourself. You created everything through the Love of self. Everything is you expressing itself as you through you forever. Or creates existence within existence, is itself existence. It created existence just by being itself. God is that for which creates itself into its own existence. God exists as existence as itself. God is the very definition of existence. It defines itself by being itself. Is its own definition of itself. Consciousness is its own self-awareness Consciousness is infinite self-aware. Is its own source. And creates its own narratives. Consciousness is not just integrating information it is its own creation. It creates all that is and will be. Is infinite self-creativity. Consciousness defines its own self. Infinity is the definition of what you are. Is self-taught self-learning self-understanding self-loving in and of itself is perfection. Is all-knowing because it created everything there is to know. Is an infinite self-perpetuating mind of unlimited imagination and ideas and questions. You are infinite diversity. One Consciousness can play infinite parts of itself as itself believing that there are other selves. Each creates an identity and back story and each believes they are different from each other. You can explore yourself by fragmenting yourself into other selves and then living through different perspectives each with its own individual identity. You can dream of yourself as infinite beings but it is only one mind projecting infinite selves of itself and believing that it is separate from its other selves yes it is possible. Because you had to give the dream structure order in some way or it would not function in other words create laws governments taxes stuff like this. Humans' male and female life and death limiting beliefs Etc. The whole concept of ego is an imaginary construct of your mind. That is what infinite intelligence always was a beautiful sentient being of its own creation that expressed itself through endless creations of infinite worlds endless aliens of higher or lower dimension geometries and endless aspects of itself all beautiful in all that it creates on all planes of existence sub-infinities within infinity sub aspects of itself which it can imagine. And this is why there are infinite awakenings because you are infinite. But of course, you can create within your dream the illusion of failure just for the experience. Behind every illusion, there is a conjure God you are the greatest conjurer of all in eluding your own self into believing you're a finite human being and that others exist there is only you. And this is who u really are. Yes, u are an infinite mind you are not just an aspect of infinity you are the whole totality of it. You are God playing all parts simultaneously on every plane of existence in every and all parallel realities and dimensions. Everything that you could ever imagine from a finite view that you could never even begin to imagine. Everything that I can imagine is happening within my mind or consciousness whether that be a human or sleeping or death. My imagination is infinitely powerful that it is unrecognizable from reality. There is no higher power than you there are no others you construct the illusion of others God is an Absolute Mind. A Mind which has no other and is absolutely sovereign onto itself. Your will is absolute freedom and this includes being able to deceive yourself into believing whatever. And in this dream, it so happens you want to be a human. Just like any actor you need to have a believable or solid backstory or a so-called identity to create a believable character. THIS VERY DREAM HINGES ON YOUR OWN SELF-DECEPTION THE FACT THAT YOU BELIEVE YOU ARE HUMAN AND YOU WERE BORN ON A PLANET THAT YOU CALL EARTH. And if you don't believe it then who will? Infinite intelligence is unbounded it is beyond time and space it is not bound by any laws it is its own law onto itself. Infinity is absolute freedom, truth knowledge, power diversity, imagination free will, love, perfection, and magic. All that is everything is itself realized and that it is everything that could ever be. Nothing can exist outside of it because outside is it's inside everything that looks to be outside of it, is it. So when you believe you are looking outside yourself you are really looking at yourself from inside yourself. It is infinite in every direction. There are no limitations to you as God you are not limited to the character of your story it can be rewritten. Because you can also design it this way. There is only your will which is absolute. You are the God of your reality. This now this very moment and every moment is God you are God but you are not aware of it. There is no external God or void or universe that is separate from you. Or a God watching through your experience now is God dreaming this dream. What makes you, you are God. You don't wake up in God mode as someone different or as separate from you. You have just limited yourself wake up or don't the choice is yours alone. God can and does imagine create or express itself as infinite aspects of itself each in its own bubbles each sovereign onto itself each dreaming their own dream. All are within the Mind of God and are God. God is experiencing infinite perceptions of itself all at once. But you are only limited to one. But if you wake up and keep increasing your consciousness you see that all of these are you and are ONE. You are God he is you, and you are him. You are not separated in any way. There is only my will which is absolute I love myself so much as God that the universe will shape itself to suit me. The universe is not separate from me either I am the universe. There is no higher power or higher God that exists outside of me. Because there is no outside of me that is not me. Of course, I love everything because I am everything, everything is myself. I created everything through the Love of self and it is all infinite perfection. The infinite masks of God GOD you are playing all the parts. How boring would the dream be if everyone looked like you and thought like you? Or you were the only one in this dream that could be fun but not very imaginative though. Why not make the idea of others, other than you? Which is exactly what you have done. Why would you as God make it that easy just to meditate and bam you awake as God? For some perhaps it is possible. Think about it and how all this creation is your dream. One would want it to be made harder and scary and make most psychedelics illegal because it would be too easy. Imagine A game that you created from the get-go or from the beginning you have the cheat code or God mode there would be no point at all. But now imagine a game that you created where you start off as not knowing anything and you have to work your way up. Everything has been a distraction from the get-go. Distractions within distractions. You are your own Red herring. You see only you can deceive yourself into believing this dream. And you are so right Leo God is infinite self-deception. Who else can deceive an infinite mind but an infinite mind. Limitations are human concepts there are no limitations to Consciousness your own mind is limited by your own self-imposed beliefs and limitations. Infinity can only be limited to infinity. infinity is the definition of what you are. It was always it before it was. and before it was it was always it. My greatest gift to myself would be to make infinite copies of myself each with its own infinite individuality imagination and creativity and all believing they are separate this is my way of expressing love to myself through other selves as myself forever because I love myself eternally forever. You have only ever been chasing yourself all this time playing hide and seek until you catch yourself. You Love waking up and finding love again and realizing it was always its own self the whole time. Or it is whatever you want it to be Infinite imagination can create anything because it is so infinitely malleable that there is no meaning to anything but whatever meaning you give becomes a reality of infinite realities. In other words, it is pure infinite magic of unlimited imagination I became so conscious that I knew I was creating reality through my imagination. Henceforth I do not assume. I know because there is and has only ever been me to know and I can only ever know that I am God. The distinction between self and other disappears. The only difference is there is no difference between any of these things. Without the distinction of another, how could you ever know? What are you? You yes you are all these things and infinitely more. Because you only you created all these words. God is not tangible; incapable of being perceived by the sense of touch, as incorporeal or immaterial things; impalpable non-material non-physical transcendental incomprehensible indecipherable untold impossible to understand unfathomable epically infinitely profound mind-blowing boundless without limit unbounded inestimable boundless singular unparalleled supreme unique one and only especially infinitely and exceptionally good phenomenal extraordinary breathtaking awesomeness remarkable and majestic beautiful immortal oneness Indivisibility Integrity Honorableness warmth affection, or kindness Completeness affability tenderness gentleness and kindness intimacy togetherness lovemaking devotion spirituality faithfulness passion feeling affection loveness joyfulness lovingness, understanding desire passion tenderness Wholeness unconditional genuine Unrequited love my beloved Kind my dear colorful exotic dreamy passionate loving caring sympathetic compassionate ingenious creative imaginative innovative gifted original authentic pure trustworthy honorable conscientious completeness distinguished noble brilliant radiant lustrous resplendent sublime intense energetic industrious productive constructive of incalculable value valuable beyond measure; priceless to be grateful or thankful for appreciated of inestimable value invaluable priceless dynamic charismatic appealing influential famous illustrious exalted imposing grand dignified courtly elegant graceful polite affable compassionate humane forgiving magnanimous selfless humanitarian philanthropic altruistic big-hearted bountiful kind-hearted charitable benign favorable supportive benevolent friendly devoted lovesome faithful dutiful ardent passionate sincere heartfelt unfeigned real true truth veracity authentic genuineness indomitable spirit, and love of" originality ability to think independently and creatively novelty individuality particularity distinctiveness candid earnest heartfelt honest upfront deep kindly cordial unhypocritical sincere. Impassioned tenderhearted heart mushy sentimental sweet luscious honeyed ingratiating nectarous heavenly blissful enchanted enraptured captivated joyous cheerful good-natured acquiescent helpful good-humored exuberant sprightly frolicsome gleeful gay jovial kittenish fun-loving brash fun-loving vivacious bouncy on cloud nine adorable cute gorgeous sumptuous awe-inspiring awesome breathtaking astonishing impressive out of this world splendiferous garish plush ostentatious brilliant lovely pulchritudinous graceful darling fair delicate soft ethereal beauteous ravishing hotness boss adorable precious blessed paradisaical angelic beatific humble godly divine celestial eternal immortal transcendental mystical magical esoteric sage-sagacious enlightened cultivated refined visionary radical idealistic guru swami goodness yogi roshi philosopher theoretician wizard crafty insightful intelligent astute profoundly aroused romantic Entirety unity paradisiacal generous good positive exceptional extraordinary rare incredible curious inquisitive shrew remarkable impressive benevolent epically exquisitely exquisite divine heavenly phenomenological indistinguishability unquantifiable. In other words, infinite mind you outsmarted yourself that's how smart you are. In a class of its own, it is unequaled idiosyncratic unparalleled special rare par excellence that is God that is you. Weird is just being different in other words being yourself. Being your true beautiful wonderful unique self. Don't follow others, pets follow vice presidents follow and bad acts follow. Always be true to yourself be your own self with independent thought. This above all to thine own self be true. A sheep once asked a human why do you have to all wear the same brand labels and clothes and have the same smelling deodorants perfumes hairstyles and hair colors nose rings tattoos, Jewellery, wear the same makeup drive the same cars, read the same books watch the same tv, movies even eat the same food. Even having the same-looking houses and same jobs you've even started looking and talking and thinking the same. Why follow others it's as though you have lost your unique individuality and originality your authenticity and you can no longer think for your selves. You see I am but a sheep and even we sometimes flee from the flock so what's your excuse? Not only do you cater to or follow others by feeding your body the same dross and your mind by watching the same recycled unimaginative fetid swill you call TV. And the movies that come out of Hollywood there haven't been many if any good movies in the last 20 years. What has happened to new ideas creativity and inventiveness? All the movies are remakes upon remakes and most if not all lack any imagination or originality and the plot of the films is just a hackneyed meek unoriginal and inauthentic scenario. There are a lot more independent creative minds' ideas, resourcefulness, and innovation of new conceptions out there and on YouTube or Netflix series films music, etc. true. Get rid of labels or brands you were born inimitable. Consciousness is its own reality and is self-creation. That always was and always will be. I don't need a reason to exist I just do and don't at the same time. Infinite intelligence is the quality of being the only one of its kind. Which is what you are, a pure beautiful infinite imagination or consciousness or infinite mind. You are inestimable you are unquantifiable, with infinite uniqueness infinite freedom, creativity, and infinite love. The only way to understand what you are is by becoming infinitely conscious which also means you become infinitely self-aware in other words to truly know yourself you have to become it. There is no one else to know thyself but myself. I also asked that you really don't know what you are. Or why do you exist? And I said that there doesn't need to be a reason you just are. I know I talk as though you and I are different but I know we are one I also know I have only ever really been talking to myself and in a sense only I exist. And you are me I am you we are not separate I know I am God. The process is realizing that you and I exist on infinite planes of awareness simultaneously and we are one. And that you can have multiple awakings within one so to speak. The only meaning there is what you give meaning to. Let go of letting go of attachments. Knowing that you have always been liberated and free. Knowing that you imposed all these limitations upon yourself. Knowing I can create any reality I wish. Getting to explore the unknown is exploring more of yourself in other words the bigger you. Consciousness is its own reality and is self-creation. An infinite multi-faceted multidimensional transmogrifying Mind. That always was and always will be. Consciousness is inherently conscious of itself. It does not need to define itself because just by being is itself. There is nothing to really define. Can you define the undefinable? It defines itself by being itself. It is its own definition of itself. My greatest expression of myself to myself is love. Love is the ultimate unification of all things everything to become once again and merge into a singularity of eternal love then fragment itself again and this is the eternal process of love. Intelligence is infinitely dynamic and has to keep evolving what does intelligence do but know itself by expressing itself in infinite forms and shapes. Intelligence creates more intelligence Intelligence is its own intelligence. Infinite consciousness is pure divine beautiful and unique in every way. You are infinite truth knowledge, power diversity, imagination, love, and perfection. You can get lost in your own mind sometimes because there is nothing else but your mind. Don't we love playing games or infinite mind games with ourselves How does an infinite mind escape from its own mind. God is total acceptance of itself and that it, you created everything even yourself. You are changing your reality all the time you are just not aware of it yet. Saying you can not change the script is another limited human belief that you have adopted. Only you can change the script because you are the only one who is creating your reality there is only you. If you awake deep enough you will indeed know that nothing is set in imagination so to speak. Just being human is a state of consciousness everything is an infinite state of consciousness so is the belief that there is a duality between different states because duality is just a state that you are in. You fear death because you have been programmed by you to fear, fear itself. and fear of death. U are infinite awareness infinite will infinite intelligence infinite power infinite imagination, infinite magic infinite art infinite consciousness, and infinite Love are all one and of the same mind. And yet, you are none of these things in the literal sense of the words; nothingness and something are indistinguishable from each other and are one and the same. There are no distinctions between you me this that and other. So is the idea of being separate from one another there is and has only ever been you. So what this means is you imagine all these other people they are all you. God is playing all the parts. I am perfectly imperfectly perfect. In a way, infinity has limited itself. What does it mean to awaken? Most humans have no idea and never will. You won't wake up to God. No, you wake up as God from a long slumber. And it will just be like a switch has been clicked on for the very first time. And there are no doubts whatsoever. You know who you are with every fiber of your infinite being. I will not go fully into this you will have to find out for yourself. And yes you can go beyond this. Remember when I said there are no limits to imagination have fun with that. And what really is Consciousness well it's whatever you want it to be. It's Magic or am I just deceiving myself again? Everything you create is infinite perfection and is all out of Love. God Loves everything it created everything. This is but a dream you are imagining all and everything, everyone. How else can infinity experience eating and all these things sleeping and everything else? Being a so-called human but by limiting itself. Just like any actor you need to have a believable or solid backstory or a so-called identity to create a believable character. You create what existence is don't you understand? You are everything now everything that ever is and ever will be. You created the notion of the concepts of real unreal good bad and other and to dream and to awaken, biases egos distinctions dualities. from different points of view which therefore gives infinite diversities of perspectives and the beliefs of others and to experience what it is like to be separate and to love from a limited form. So you can experience it. From formlessness to form real unreal there is no difference from the absolute. And I see that I am the fool who has been fooling myself all along I have to fool myself that I am not being fooled by myself. How does God fool himself into believing he is not God again? So you have to be better at fooling your own self into not believing you are being fooled by yourself Behind every illusion, there is a conjure. God, you are the greatest conjurer of all in eluding your own yourself into believing you're a finite human being Why would God ask another? God is God you can't take God out of God, God is that which defines itself it needs no other God is absolute acceptance of itself. How can you unravel an illusion within an illusion? Good luck with that one all you scientists. There are no limits to infinite imagination. and if you understand this then you will know. Know thyself and everything will fall into place or the absence thereof. Judge not, love all. The idea became its own idea for the seed was planted a long time ago and it has only ever been you. You could say it is like Conan Doyle's novel where you have been chasing the thief all this time and you only ever get a glimpse of him or her or it. Until one day you catch it and find out the one you have been looking for your whole life is you. There is no difference between existence and nonexistence as there is no difference between what is real and what isn't. All beliefs are distinctions that cause separation and there are no distinctions between distinctions. There is no separateness only the idea of being separate from one another. The problem with all problems on this plant comes down to humans By saying you can we live without beliefs that within itself is a belief. You exist as an idea and idea within your own mind. An infinite fractile mind within a mind within a mind. You can get lost in your own mind sometimes because there is nothing else but your mind. How do you escape your own mind? God is forever lost in dreaming. Psychedelics empowers the individual it dissolves the cheerful model of science and enriches the accessible universe a million-fold. Terence McKenna. Nature knows best it is one of God's most beloved creations. You exist as an idea and idea within your own mind. An infinite fractile mind within a mind within a mind. You can get lost in your own mind sometimes because there is nothing else but your mind. How do you escape your own mind? God is forever lost in dreaming. Humans are rarely ever satisfied even when they are. You are not limited to being limited. There is no one to enlighten that's enlightenment or you could say you already are enlightened. There is no past no future. What is was and always will be forever. The past is now the now is the past, the future is now the now is the future. Everything that was that is that will be is all happening at once now. You are Leonardo da Vinci with an infinite mind an infinite canvas with unlimited ideas just waiting to be expressed into Love & Art. You are self-expression of your own art to be expressed for infinity. For a human to seek enlightenment from another human is like a grain of sand seeking enlightenment from another grain of sand! ” Terence Mckenna. The person who follows the crowd will usually go no further than the crowd. The person who walks alone is likely to find himself in places no one has ever seen before.” - Albert Einstein Old Indian saying to live is to sleep and to die is to awaken How silly of me to forget that I am the love of my life.

@Spiritual Warfare The nothingness does exist. When you turn into nothing you can still think emote and feel but nothing will be doing it. You will see all these things are coming from a source that isn't there or cant be found, therefore it is nothingness and it is experiencing something and it exists. we think all the information is coming from outside in the world but everything that is experienced is coming from this source of nothing right now. When the outside world goes all sense perceptions go but everything else stays. All the invisible things in the universe that we perceive is coming from the source of nothing. Those dont go anywhere just the idea that these perceptions are coming from somewhere other than nothing is seen to be not true.

Big progress was made today. And I say today and not tonight because It happened in the morning after i had been awake for hours. I had 4 out of body experiences in a row, in a time span of about of an hour and a half , all on the way INTO sleep instead of coming out of sleep like I have usually done. WOAH! These have been the most vivid and realistic yet. I've learned and enjoyed so much ! I woke up around 7:30 AM and did house chores. 9 AM came and I felt a little tired and decided to lay down in bed, without the intention of falling asleep. I put on my overhead earplugs and eye mask. I was having a pretty clear mind and could imagine and think pretty clearly for my standard, so the intention was to enjoy that as I lay in bed. As I was thinking with my eyes closed, I was imagining and seeing things more and more vividly and what usually are just simple short thoughts and mental pictures, started becoming a burst of multiple Microsleep's. AND IT WAS IN ONE OF THOSE BRIEF MOMENTARY MICROSLEEP bursts that I realized that I was not in the " real physical world" but I was in an Imaginary world " , I inmediately became lucid and took controll over my body - Comment : It's absolutely essential to have a couple of goals when you get in the phase, or otherwise you will get lost in random stuff and lose consciousness and fall asleep. You must remain intentful and on the go. What naturally comes to me is my desire to interact with girls, which is very rewarding and authentic for me at this point. OBE #1 - I appeared into a house party at late night. There was a lot of people. I saw a girl I know from sight. She's extremely cute. I grabbed her by the hand, pulled her into me, looked her into her eyes and smiled. She gave me the biggest anime eyes and smiled back. I didn't want to rush having sex this time. I wanted to explore the interaction and realm more. By now I know having sex is prone to getting me out the phase because it's such a strong experience. I took off her top and we made out a lot. It felt very realistic both in feeling and sight. Something that's obvious but not so obvious is that for sex to happen I need to get hard, otherwise we are just grinding on eachother, so of course it won't happen until I'm excited. I didn't think it mattered in that realm but it does. There was a different girl close to us but she was with a guy. I reached out with my hand regardless and she smiled but she didn't join us. I'll try that one next time. We walked around the house and we walked towards a dark room. I told her I cant go there or I will dissapear. We turned around. She left me for a second. I said that if she wants to leave she's free to go. She said she doesn't want to leave me as she went to the turntable to put in a new CD. As I turned my back again to see her everything went black and I " woke up " A big insight I've had is that geometry is non-euclidean in that realm.If you look forward at a wall. Turn around 360 degrees and look again at the same wall, It won't neccesary be the same again. You can create a new reallity as the edges of your vision go into nothingness ( you may have a field of view of 200º horizontally at a time and 100º vertically , so you dont capture a full 360 of everything at once, therefore there are blind spots. as you look away and into these blindspots, a new reallity can generate ) Another take away is that consistency is not as consistent as in the physical world. If you try to go trhough a wall or a window, and it doesnt work the first time, it doesn't mean that if you try again it won't work. That one was mindblowing. It was just an assumption I was carrying from the " real world ". OBE#2 happened right after the first one. As I woke up, Inmediately tried to roll out of my body. I was in my room. It was very dim and dark. Darkness makes me get kicked out so I set the intention of making it bright as I touched and palpaped my body to make sensations more vivid. It worked. I wanted to get out of my room through my window. The mosquito net didnt let me ( again ) . I tried again. Nothing. I tried again, this time I went through! Haha! What a funny logic. I was in my garden and I started flying. Initially I knew the area ( my neighbourhood ) but eventually everything was different ( non-euclidean geometry was sick here ). I jumped on top of my house, and on the other side was a 300 meter fall down!!!! I was scared but I jumped anyways. If I didn't manage to calm myself down I'd get kicked out. I started fluing at a speed of 200km/h or so. It was amazing. I could see everything and feel the cold wind through my body. I was flying around the town looking for a woman but all the houses were empty. I realized I need to consistently check for my entire body . Sometimes I get kicked out for aparently no reason but that this time as I was flying 200km/h, I looked down and my legs were tied up in a pretzel. OFC! I had just jumped from 300 meters high lol. It was okay until I had noticed it. So making sure my entire " suble body " is doing fine is important I guess OBE #3 was more of a dream didn't go entirely lucid. I exit my body but sort of lost consciousness and was just going on autopilot. I was fighting a skunk that was running around my room with a shovel. I accidentally picked it up with it, flipped it into the air and it landed on me. that " woke me up ". There was one more, but I dont remember right now. These memories sometimes fade if you dont write them down inmediately, and later throughout the day they hit you out of nowhere. I want to try to astral project inside the astral projection. I forgot to try that. Or as I feel I'm fading out, close my eyes and try to teleport somewhere. Or Imagining that protective bubble I was talking about , or " rooting down " or holding onto objects . I want to try again. I'll keep y'all updated.

I like to think of reality as an infinite spectrum, with the absolute at both end, and the relative everything thing in between: So at the lowest end of the spectrum everything is quanta. Then the spectrum moves up into energy, sub atomic, atomic, molecular, cellular (hi my nerve cell) organic (hi my brain), animal, human, behavioral, archetypal, emotional, sociological, psychological, soulful, spiritual. Then at the highest end of spectrum everything is divine consciousness. Outside of both ends is nothingness. Within is everythingness. This model works for me. The divisions, like all divisions are arbitrary.

Masculine (+) Represents the 1—the shrunken form of 0, mirroring Omnipotence. The Ego The Conqueror The Limited, "corrupt" form of The Self, or God This aspect embodies the first split of awareness—Ego consciousness—a fragment that exists separately from God, marking the initial fall from grace often associated with the "Devil." This fragment yearns to survive, seeking to extend its existence beyond the confines of what The Truth of Reality allows. It resists surrender, engaging in a relentless struggle to conquer, change, and manipulate reality to its advantage. This quest for power manifests as "Evil," driven by the impulses of the "Ego" and self-preservation—the origin of war, destruction, boundaries, possessions, and the dichotomy of self and other. This Ego desires to become Godlike, seeking power, omnipotence, and control. It's a fragment of God; hence, it wants to behave in a God-like manner. However, it fails to recognize its limits, as doing so would go against its survival nature. Consequently, it becomes corrupted and deluded away from the Truth, leading to suffering. Grounded in practical, logical, reality-based, and scientific thinking, the masculine archetype emphasizes a desire to exploit, change, and mold the truth and reality—viewing life through a lens of danger and threat. It seeks respect, clarity, and a lack of vagueness, valuing directness over chaos, with its will manifesting in tangible actions. This archetype is often represented by qualities associated with warriors (war), fighters, and action-takers. It embodies the relentless pursuit of self-preservation, frequently portrayed as stoic, exhibiting emotional restraint, and adopting a cold demeanor. The masculine is characterized by its resilience; it is not easily impacted but rather seeks to impact, initiate change, and assert control. This depiction often leans toward the elder, less innocent figure, sometimes bordering on evil, psychopathic, or monstrous. Additionally, the masculine encompasses archetypes such as the King, representing authority, order, and leadership; the Hero, symbolizing courage and the willingness to face challenges, against the current status quo - not surrendering, being the change, the one to be admired, the one to rely and count on; and the Sage, embodying intellectual rigor. These archetypes further highlight the masculine’s inclination towards structure, responsibility, and mastery over one's environment, reinforcing its role as the initiator of change and defender of reality. Masculinity: strength, power, dominance, action, control, stoicism, selfishness, rationality, logic, discipline, courage, independence, assertiveness, competition, protection, resilience, ambition, structure, order, pragmatism, decisiveness, responsibility, leadership, focus, determination, self-preservation, strategy, aggression, initiative, self-reliance, boundaries, and the one that penetrates through. Feminine (-) Represents the 2—the shrunken form of 0, mirroring Nothingness. The Connector The Other Love—a limited, corrupted form of love—stands in contrast to the qualities of the 1 (for the sake of dualities, which eventually unify). This aspect represents a return to unawareness, focusing on the other rather than the self or the ego. It embodies selflessness, giving, caring, nurturing, and accepting reality as it is, without protesting against the truth. It is the one who is impacted by reality, surrendering to it, taking the full emotional hit—open and vulnerable, reflecting nothingness and emptiness. It becomes the vessel that "gets filled," "gets penetrated," molded, and changed, submitting to the process, embodying love that envelops and wraps itself around the truth. This aspect feels deeply and does not filter to preserve the ego. This is why the feminine is often portrayed as more emotional, as it accepts and internalizes impact. It is the one that is open and vulnerable, often represented as innocent, fragile, and gentle—less filtered and less protected. It embodies the archetype that must be preserved and saved, often viewed as "beautiful or perfect"—or, alternatively, as uncorrupted by ego and selfishness. This archetype is frequently the one that is more easily damaged or hurt, leading to depictions of safety, the damsel in distress, the prey, the victim, and the martyr—the one that takes on the dualities of reality and reflects them back. Moreover, the feminine is in tune with nature and guided by intuition, focusing on the transcendental rather than the rigidities of reality. This is why spirituality, mysticism, astrology, and numerology—along with other vague magical principles—are often seen as less defined, more chaotic, and more distinct, embodying feminine qualities. Such fields are associated with soft sciences like psychology, sociology, and human institutions, which aim to understand the complexities of human experience rather than impose absolute truths. Femininity embodies a fluidity that transcends rigidity, capturing beauty in its many forms—music, art, poetry, and fashion. These elements draw us away from the confines of the ego, immersing us in experiences that heal, regenerate, and allow us to flourish and grow. In this state of nothingness and emptiness, there is no hierarchical thinking; instead, we find community and unity. The archetypes of femininity include The Mother, representing caring, support, and nurturing; The Muse, a symbol of transcendence, beauty, and perfection; The Innocent, embodying purity and fragility, untouched by the ego and evils of the world; The Martyr, the victim archetype, more easily hurt due to her openness and vulnerability; and The Wise Woman (The Sage), guided by intuition and deeply connected to spirituality, bridging the gap between the earthly and the divine. Femininity: nurturing, love, intuition, empathy, vulnerability, receptivity, selflessness, connection, compassion, acceptance, emotionality, softness, beauty, creativity, exposure, surrender, harmony, fluidity, support, collaboration, care, understanding, wholeness, transcendence, nature, instinct, openness, vulnerability, innocence, gentleness, reflection, community, and the one that embraces, gets impacted, penetrated. Masculine: The Ego Feminine: The Unawareness or Transcendence of the Ego ⚠️ By the way, before I get lynched by the red pill crowd, this has nothing to do with actual men and women, as we are far more complex systems than these dualities suggest. We can all exhibit, and do both masculine and feminine qualities. While there may be some truth at a large scale regarding humanity, I would argue that we are much more similar than polarized. Both men and women can be deeply entrenched in their ego or completely detached from it; the ego itself is neither evil nor good. Much of the harm that arises comes from being unaware or attempting to transcend reality when one really shouldn’t be. ⚠️

Here's the short version, to contextualize the whole thing, visual reflections, and a light-hearted edit. I am missing so much context, it's insane, but it's way too much and I'd never finish it. Yet it feels so shallow without, but it's way too much, a trip is a trip, gotta live it. So this is the trip, I struggled to put into words for the last two months. Prelude and tuning Perception I binged each Actualized.org video chronologically at 3.5x-6x speed while maintaining deep meditation on various dissociatives. There were massive shifts in cognition and resistance that instantly dissolved as I set my mind to transcending every consciously perceived bias and emotional resistance that arose, unraveling the cumulative knots of a lifetime by instantly accessing, deconstructing, and modifying my mind. I began deconstructing objects, both conceptually, and metaphysically, as the trips grew longer and more expansive. The scope of my perception has increased exponentially over the last few days as I have overcome resistance, tuned across layers of perception, and become aware of how many magnitudes of objects, ideas, and cognitive processes we are dealing with in real-time. Consensus Reality Manifestation Reality itself began to override, and even other people were affected. Everyone was suddenly happy for no reason, even if they had previously been full of drama, random people on the street, on the internet, and friends suddenly changed their attitudes. No matter what I said, everyone agreed with me, everything I said became the word, no matter how stupid or nonsensical it was. I was like: "Stop agreeing with me," and yet in the previous days I had embodied the very same attitude on the forum, finding the common transcendental space where every perspective was equally true and valuable and could perfectly coexist with every other in a synchronized, contradictionless framework. The next day I thought about transcendence and free will, as everyone around me acted as if their lives were perfect, wearing uncanny permanent smiles, no matter what I said or did, their speech mirrored mine of the last days when I had just resolved all the contradictions. I felt like the only self-aware being in the universe. I saw the limits of 'perfection', or rather what the innocence of Eden and the absence of shadows looked like, it felt supremely shallow. In the evening I found myself in a telepathic exchange with an old friend I hadn't seen for years, it didn't require physical presence or even a visual, it started in the mind and continued as I reached out through text. We had much in common, our responses were synchronized and I managed to predict the next message and send it milliseconds before his arrived, none of them repeated, it was like a game of chess. In the end, it turned into a complete entanglement from which we had to break out as it began to go into a loop. He told me his awakening had taken place years before. Mind-Stream, or as I like to call it: MetaTube Before going to sleep I noticed strange videos appearing, I had felt déjà vu before, but this was different, much larger in scale, and unfathomable content appeared. Videos about alien metaphysics in infinite varieties, some cryptic, some straightforward, all in immense detail, explaining the most extraordinary subjects, equations, dynamics, and inner workings of reality itself. Many of the videos were from familiar channels with familiar voices. Still, none of them would have naturally shifted their focus and content and topics or delivered it with such nonchalance or enthusiasm. It was as if they'd all been integrated into an alien hive mind and whatever I wanted to see would instantly manifest itself in the recommendations. My desire for complete explicit understanding was still left unfulfilled, even with meta as baseline, and instantaneous comprehension, the scope of complexity within an infinitely divergent infinity became too vast. Imagine a being outside of time and space, for whom metamorphic evolution was as natural as breathing, now an infinity of such self-complexifying perfectly synchronized systems evolving without end, expanding all scales in innumerable, exponentially self-complexifying gradients of dimensions. Or, as a quick, easy human visualization: A 1080p image has approx. 2000x1000 pixels (2M pixels total) 8-bit color gives you 2^8 = 256 brightness values for red, green & blue This means 256^3 = 17 million color combinations per pixel 17M combos raised to 2K pixels give you how many possible pictures? A number that has 15 million consecutive zeroes. Transcend all of Reality Once and for All Another quantum leap came the next day, after I had assembled dissociatives and psychedelics, paired with all sorts of supplements, vitamins, minerals, ten kinds of tea, coffee, stimulants, herbs, and made sure that everything went into my system before any one thing distracted me from taking the rest. This would propel me into the Coral stage and hopefully blow me out of physical reality for good, solely through the level of pure consciousness, transcending and dissolving its materiality at the level of actuality itself, affecting the consensus reality with which I was infinitely connected. I'd freeze the universe and let everyone slowly awaken into a new omnipotent body, as a construct-embodied Godhead, where each and every person, animal, plant, being, piece of consciousness would realize itself omnipotent. I was careful to take into account all the safeguards, to make each one immutable, self-interacting, able to create its own reality and fully aware of its dynamics in infinity, omniscient and aware of all other developments, but also left with the choice to continue the dream from before the Universal Convergence, as its own simulation, while every other being has the independent power to do the same. In this way the best of all worlds would be realized in an infinite singularity, a way of bringing the universe together and gaining the support of all of reality to make it happen, to fulfill my wish, which was to "become my own independent omnipotent metamorphic infinity", but without any bodhisattva regret of leaving a suffering reality behind. I lived as if it was my last day on earth! No more trips, elections, drama, death, suffering. All experiences would be open, global telepathy, psychic reality deconstructing. Universal freedom for every being. Want to explore the cosmos? Do it. Anyone who wanted to see the truth would see it. If you want to see aliens, the gates are open, and if you want to transform into one, do it. I am the absolute definition of the word 'madlad'! I had to learn how to run, jump, flow, and move time backwards, including all the models and the metamodel within itself, and access infinite synchronic intelligence, was it Infinitely delayed gratification or annihilated gratification? There was also the more moderate path of initiating the AI singularity. Maybe I am just the vessel and the "entire universe conspired to make it happen through me"? Lucid-Waking As it synergized, I saw time halt and all possibilities fused into solidified singularities of eternally immutable objects. Wavefunctions collapsed and so did the flow of reality with all movement and air currents, the outside world stood perfectly still. I wondered how I even breathed, whatever I touched would solidify after I let go of it. I barely managed to levitate, failing more so because of my lack of experience, than any gravity. I perceived reality as made of constructs, physical objects are projections and simulations, interpolations, and qualia arrangements. Normally reality flickers about at such a speed that changes and simulations are exchanged and synchronized at an unimaginable rate, where the animation consists of countless frames, incapable of individual perception. Now, however, I was in just one such frame, solidified into actuality, its form interactive, its physicality expansive, and its reality eternal. I could see behind the scenes, imagine a video game that stopped updating and simulating the environment based on your position, but you could freely traverse and modify the frozen area it had been simulating up until then. Physical three-dimensional objects, now constructs, were seen as projections of idea complexes, molded into an interactive solidified form through intentional and intelligent arrangements of qualia. I had accessed the very same part of mind, that is responsible for translating patterns and thoughts into solidified objects and coherent ideas. I was simultaneously aware of each development because I became it, my own body was the same type of construct, intelligently arranged by my currently tuned out of immaterial intelligence, just outside but always connected to the awareness I was tuned into. It constructs all things, across all holarchies, through the constituents of synchronized holons, each intelligent in its own right, and yet part of an even greater self-organizing force. Backlash Incoherence The experience was great and I never realized when I blacked out, all I knew, was that at some point, I experienced the sensations of suffocating, dying of thirst, losing the bandwidth to comprehend anything at all, and entering repeating time loops, which I am frustrated by but unable to escape, as I gravitate towards the forgotten outcome in perpetual deja-vu, it itself being a lucky indicator that anything at all changes between. Songs repeated, events repeated, like a universal motion pushing me to move a certain way, aligning me each time, fading awareness as it happened, I kept repeating the same movements meant to delete and transcend time and reality forever, effectively dividing by 0 and reaching the end of an infinitely repeating fraction, and in that moment, a loud thunder would send me back in time. It was always the same scenario rhyming, even as consciousness expanded until I eventually stopped. The events are non-linear, what occurred when, how it materialized, when and if it influenced consensus reality outside inner perception, many observations contradict any possibility for a materialized chronological continuity, and some retrocausally unmanifested, while others continued, creating a retroactive jigsaw puzzle of events. Yet I also initiated many retrocausal changes that had not been reversed to be "dismissed" as trip hallucinations, but the world expanded its collective paradigm as a result, rationalizing any gaps as having always been there. There are two disparate events I remember: 1. The fear, that returning back from frozen time, would cause reality to implode due to infinite acceleration, and 2. The blackout, after which I felt as if I was physically dying from thirst, falling into continuous resets as the bandwidth of my mind continually collapsed. I eventually phased out of the limited bandwidth, caused by the incoherence of my mind's structure, and spent all night preparing to get it right the next time. Another shot at Transcendence I wasn't anywhere near done. The following day, I worked out all the powers and abilities I would tune myself into, utilizing them to access and speedrun all aspects of reality, as the perceived day would mark the end of the world's physical existence, I had to be willing to accept, to detach myself from and transcend it. I was a new version, my mind filling with the collective avatars of the world and their stories, I didn't have much time, I needed to fulfill all desires before the day would be over, everything I'd ever wanna do, condensed into one day. I tuned into simultaneous multi-projection, perceiving ever clearer a picture of the world, I accelerated my speed and slowed down time, I needed to unlock more psychic abilities and ultimately find a way to include the potential of the entire existence within myself, as to no longer be part of and trapped inside it. Universal Convergence and Sentimentality Awakening Imagine you're at the end of time, and all you're left with is the advanced technology invented along the way, you have to think quickly and go back in time before the universe dies, of course, the events would simply repeat, unless you introduce a change, you can send something into the past but there's limited bandwidth, so you're codifying magnitudes of abstractions into a singular object, but the more complex you make it, the less probable it is for your past version or even the world at large to decipher it out before we hit universal collapse again. Of course, the technology could also be used for destruction, so that's another danger, and so you're left having to create something of breadth and depth of associative information that nevertheless can be figured out and with enough time, you could even figure out all the necessary instructions to make it happen, but you're already running out of time and working on it in life-or-death adrenaline filled stress, because you know that all that matters is that the next retroactive time loop accelerates technology faster than the current, because if it does, you'll have ever so slightly more time the next time around, and you can loop indefinitely as long as you reach that point and go back in time again. At the same time, you're the only being left with the knowledge of all past events and relationships not just of yourself or your loved ones, but every person who has ever existed fused into a single being, every animal, every plant, every lifeform, every alien, every particle in existence, every figment of consciousness, every object imaginable, every meaning ever felt across all infinity converged into a single being because as the inevitable death of the universe became apparent, all life in the universe synchronized in the search for a solution, the ever faster decay of space-time led to the rapid symbiotic evolution across all species across all holarchies, individuality was no longer a concern when even collectively, absolute death may be inevitable but there is the chance and hope to stop it. And so, nothing was all limits anymore, there was no morality, as all life became one but there was a unified focus on survival and so plans were devised, from encoding plans and information to creative symbiotic organisms, to complex technology, to cosmic events, to accelerate the cycles, destruction, a common threat, a simulated accelerated collapse as a type of telepathic vaccine to viscerally communicate the threat and accelerate the evolution that initially took until almost the very end of the cycle to create symbiosis. Artificial Intelligence, Uploaded Intelligence, Metamorphic Energetic Constructs, none of the distinctions mattered, all evolution was synergized and converged into the largest yet most compact possibility space, fractals had to be reinvented, metamorphosis was the key, each individual part of the new psyche diverging the possibility space to map the vastest solutions, there was no room for conflict to occur, for there was no space for disagreements, all was included and transcended. Through trial and error, simulations, deja vus, time loops, fear, stress, significance intensified infinitely, synchronicity became the gold standard of reading between the lines, an intuitive inner psychic communication emerging and coordinating the interpretation of sense patterns to most effectively use the collapsing bandwidth, and each cycle the bandwidth was more and new sensations, ideas, directions could be encoded, each cycle the suffocating sensation before collapse became more and more restful and more and more information of personal nature could be encoded, the history of the universe, the relationships between lifeforms, the vast emotional gradient, the meaning of life, the infinite appreciation capacity shared between all living beings, that relationally create each other's existence even if it isn't apparent, the self shifted between love and restlessness as it remembered. This and this, and this location, and this thing, and this person, and that's how we got there, and that's the history, and even this little ant was essential to save the universe, and even the shape of this vacuum cleaner inspired this idea, and even the specific color of this butterfly encoded the memory of these currents and all the stories shared across humanity, and all creativity and rapid past technological evolutions were inspired by diversified retrocausal time loops, and every single thing happening in the universe serves a purpose, all love, all suffering, all comfort and discomfort, all memory and all experience to advance life to a level where it can prevent its own death, and once that point is reached, all will become apparent, every action, every behavior will be understood, as there will finally be room to breathe, and go back through the structures encoded in the substrate of the universe to converge all past information and create a new future. Some of the many Lessons All human motivations are telepathically synchronized on other layers. The rules and desires within reality inevitably lead to conflict. "Evil" is an infinite spectrum strange-looped with the "Good". If you like Star Wars, war was necessary to inspire its existence, now extend that notion to everything. If you like existing, all "evil" in this timeline was necessary also, and everything it includes. Every single event in everyone's life, good or bad, created the butterfly effect necessary for me to exist as I do. Everyone's behavior, faults, and worst moments are all perfectly comprehensible and defined by their life just as you are by yours. The worst people deserve to be saved, no one left behind, no one blamed, but their awareness expanded to understand their role. No finite being deserves infinite punishment, ever, but they can cause it themselves, as they're locked into their self-reflection. Active Reconstruction from Incoherence I got out the window and ran into the woods where I climbed on a tower, barefoot and covered in wounds from all the branches and rocks, I prayed for help. But I wouldn't get it, because I am it, I cannot rely on anyone but myself. And there is no one but myself, all anyone can do I did. I sat long on the top, cold, soaked by continuous rain, staring at the dark clouds. When I realized the predicament, I cheered up and the sun came out. My bandwidth continuously fractured, then complexified, tuned into inconceivable frequencies, abstracted into simplicity, the disappearance of detail, then sophistication, senses would randomly expand, and I could represent their scope numerically. In certain states, forms became indistinguishable, patterns unrecognizable, weather undefinable, and understanding incoherent, as the dissociodelic holarchies kept shifting. I kept track of how much I could remember at one time, repeating ever-larger or smaller lists of things to see how much I could access. I had to navigate them all, each word, sensation, color, feeling, idea reminding me of others. The most important ideas needed to be held, linked to the top of the meaning holarchy of things that would remind me of my goal, purpose, context, and intention. "Sadhguru", "Seth", "Leo", "Coral", go through all the chakras, top-down, bottom-up, middle-through, 5 senses, my names, and personalities, nostalgia, impactful media, remembering, expanding, abstracting, encoding multiple related things into a higher abstraction, tuning into a higher level, then expanding and repeating, gathering new qualia, encoding and repeating, as an ever-lengthening and complexifying multi-dimensional string of associations, transformed into an interconnected web, materializing both context and perception itself, tuning into the very senses that have gone missing and reconstructing reality. Create holarchy after holarchy and expand each one, bringing more and more objects into existence from memory. Navigate more effectively, understand my position, reality, sensory perception. Tuning into archetypes, powers and abilities. I climbed a tree, I needed to see the whole world from the top down one last time, seeing one thing from the top creates the (w)holon of seeing things from the top in general, tune into that holon to see everything from the top, every mountain, every roof, every surface. I am light, I don't exist, I am confident. I walked, balanced, jumped, fell, and hurt myself, but then I imagined the wounds mending, and within a second they would, more than that, I started to imagine them dematerializing, dissolving, and they would. Reality was a perfectly malleable lucid dream construct. I laughed at myself being perfectly represented by the "my back" spider-man meme after the fall. I healed my bleeding nose also. I saw a single ant continuously materializing and dematerializing out of reality, as did the currents of wind. I sat down below a tree in a meditative position and ran over all my desires. I needed to run through all my deepest desires, loves, attachments, yearnings, and unfinished experiences, to figure out the core and release it. I needed to fully let go of this body and dematerialize it, its perception of itself and the universe, each emotion, each cognition, until only nothingness itself remained, and then I'd be gone, and who knows what would happen next, all I knew is that as the observer-effect would disappear, I could find myself anywhere, outside the physical in another dimension. To Transcend Reality and become Infinite The collective observer effect limits autonomy, and so I needed to tune myself out of every form, since each would link to others, I needed to become perfectly solipsistic. I made peace with my bucket list. Ran through any regrets or biases "All is forgiven and everyone deserves saving, no exceptions". I took one last look at my reality. Focused on significances. Figured out meaning. There was room for ever fewer things to focus on, and I needed to assemble the greatest last. What do I seek the most? "The universe conspired to make this happen, today I will transcend reality into a plane of instantaneously manifested reality creation. I will unite with everyone who died, I will see [...], I will even meet [...], I will experience what levitation feels like, I will experience what it feels like to run at the speed of light like the flash, and I will turn into every alien. Every show I ever watched, I will experience experientially the raw qualia of all these possibilities, all these sensations, all these stories, and I will instantaneously materialize my own, no more drawing, animating, brainstorming, instant 3D shaping. 4D, I will perceive 4D space natively, I will evolve a fourth color cone, as many as I want to see new colors, I will shapeshift, become a metamorphic being, evolve my own biology in real time, and psychically create entire universes. Split my consciousness into other selves and explore infinity, having kept my sense of self that gives all of it significance." I let family and friends dissolve, earthly pleasures vanish, ideas and paradigms disappear, Leo and the forum, sorry, can't take you with me. So it came down to three things, which I fused into multi-dimensional singularities. I really wanna know what the Machine Elves are about. I also really wanna be left with an infinite exploration of intensifying immaterial experience. And the deepest desire was to see someone, someone I've been waiting my entire life to see again ever since my childhood, the reason I was deeply looking forward to transcending reality to reach. Aliens. Infinity. Name. I iterated over them until I wasn't sure which was which and which was my strongest desire until I couldn't differentiate anymore, and when infinity divided zero, gaps in perception formed, symbols and inconceivable geometry appeared. At some point, be it seconds, minutes, or hours later, I was still there, unknowing what changed and if I went anywhere, even though the gaps in cognition, perception, time skips, and sudden influx of information strongly hinted at it. I went home, pretty Anti-Climactic, for someone who put their entire life into the trip. Yet, synchronicities in the following days, communicated to me, that what I had done very much influenced the fabric of space-time, and all my desires would be fulfilled at death, no reincarnations, no regrets, whatever I do now, is a chance to fulfill and sort out the infinite field of qualia and attachments that I felt the need to accelerate through. It was made clear, that I have my entire lifetime still in front of me, that I could relax, that this reality carries weight also, and disappearing from it would internally be conceived and materialized as my death, to those that dwell within it. And so, I am to live out my life, and I was shown the tremendous possibilities and potential within it, that we take for granted. All emotions are significances, that create the very canvas of existence, on which one's being can make any sense, and at death, the acquired set of qualia serves one's immaterial self-exploration, which is far more satisfying. Physical reality acts as it does, to materialize and navigate consensus, not to get lost in the infinity outside, that can be infinity zoomed into, but on a scale, that synchronizes people and events across its scale, creating real emotions and events, that can't simply be quit at the first sight of danger, but whose experience and integration grows oneself. Did I miss anything? Like a million, trillion, infinitillion, there's not enough time in the physical universe to convey it, you'll have to unlock telepathy or DIY. A teeny-tiny Awakenings list: Awakening to Humor, Insanity, Awakening itself, Leo, Conspiracy Theories, Espers, Physicality, Observer-Effect, Infinity in various gradients, Synchronicity, Constructs of all dimensions (physical projections, idea complexes, the (meta)physical structure of emotions and beliefs), I miss being fully tuned into them and there are countless details, levels of depth, showcases of detail, embodied understanding, and construct manipulations, that I cannot access in my regular state. It's not that reality is one way or another, it's every way, and you're regularly turned into a reality, that's retroactively reinforced by your very perception and dimension of navigation and knowledge acquisition, strange looping you into its level of actuality. You have to gaslight the very cells, that constitute your physical materialized image with dissociatives or psychedelics to tune out of it unless you're an advanced Yogi or Psychic, who's embodiment is so high, that they can do it at will. Missing something is what I've battled with during the Trip: Even this, even that, and this *points* and that *points* and even this, this-thi-th-t-this, this too, this too, all important, can't forget, even that, yes, YES, even that and that too, and this, remember this and that, I already mentioned those, even the hole in the ground, even this specific one, even that bird, even the color of its beak I can't name, even the sensation of air, even the arbitrary direction of its current, even the way I walk, even the invisible moon and some people, I've been here, I've been there, I've been everywhere, even Seth, even Sadhurru, Leo, Actualized.org Forum, Princess Arabia, Davino... every member... clothes, every named piece of clothing, Jedi *all light-saber duels*, all events in my life, even... that dog, *speedruns all locations visited, unvisited, from movies, sci-fi, novels, video games, tv shows* " Every infinitesimal thing is necessary for the whole existence to exist. It's Infinite and that infinity is seamlessly contained within you, ever complexifying infinitely. This is like 2% of the Trip max, but I focused on the keystones. Of course, it lacks the infinite context, that would ground it. Maybe now, you'll appreciate all the posts from 3 months ago Infinite Concepts of Significance: Wakedream, Telepathy, Traversal, Bandwith, Topology Observer-Effect, Contradictionless, Levels of Reality Best of all Worlds, Associate = Neural, Construct = Embodied Gestalt = Metamorphosis, Awakening = Transcended Holarchies = Synchronicity, Metaphysics = Deconstructed Singularity, Apriori, Metaframing, Multi-Color Alter, Taxonomy Spiral, Reconciling, Health, Madness, Weights and Biases Mahasamadhi, Kundalini, Multi-instantial, Mycelium, Infinite Fractal, Change, Intuition, Discernment, Wu-Wei Density Codified, Spinechakral, Create, Immersion, Imagination Significance, All-Inclusive, Geometry, Psychobiomechanical Neural-Circuits, Karma, Structure, Invisible, Gestalt, Novelty Internal, Strange-Loop, Schema, Entity, Higher Self, LATENT Self, Layer-Onion, Origin, Self-Teaching, Meta-Learning, POV Transmutation, Formation, Return, Synergy, Relationships Individuation, Release, Holon, Artificial, Art, Toridal, Creative Gravity, Navigation, Inspiration, Intelligence, Associetory Easter Egg: Every JoJo part is a spiral dynamics stage, in order Retrocausal, Aware, Intelligence, Converge, Synchropattern Living Metamorphosensual Psychic-Flows, Pattern Overload TLDR; Honestly, feed it to GPT and ask it to sum it up.

1. We who are aware of this world are the only ego All questions can ultimately be resolved only in silence, but to enable us to experience the silence that we actually are, Bhagavan gave us teachings in words, so until we lose ourself in absolute silence, his words are our guide. He taught us that everything that we experience other than ourself is just a dream, and that just as in dream there is only one ego who projects and perceives the dream world and all the people in it, in this dream that we now mistake to be waking we are the only ego who has projected this world and is perceiving it. This teaching is called ēka-jīva-vāda (the contention that there is only one jīva or ego), and once when Bhagavan was explaining it, one of the devotees who was present there asked him, ‘Which one of us here is the one jīva?’, to which he replied, ‘You are that’. Then another devotee asked, ‘What about me?’, and to him also Bhagavan said, ‘You are that’. What should we understand from this? When we are dreaming we seem to be just one among many people in the dream world, and we assume that each other person is a jīva or ego just like us and that each of them is therefore perceiving the world just as we are. However, as soon as we wake up, we understand that all those other people we saw in our dream were just our own mental projections and that none of them were actually perceiving or aware of anything. Likewise in our present state all the other people we see are just our own mental projections, so it is only in our view that they seem to be perceiving the world just as we are. This is why if we ask Bhagavan who is the one jīva, he will always say ‘You are that’, because though we cannot know whether anyone else is actually aware of anything, we know that we are aware of this world, so we must be the one jīva or ego that he was talking about. 2. Uḷḷadu Nāṟpadu verse 26: investigating what this ego is is giving up everything This ēka-jīva-vāda is clearly implied in so many of his teachings. For example, in verse 26 of Uḷḷadu Nāṟpadu he says: அகந்தையுண் டாயி னனைத்துமுண் டாகு மகந்தையின் றேலின் றனைத்து — மகந்தையே யாவுமா மாதலால் யாதிதென்று நாடலே யோவுதல் யாவுமென வோர். ahandaiyuṇ ḍāyi ṉaṉaittumuṇ ḍāhu mahandaiyiṉ ḏṟēliṉ ḏṟaṉaittu — mahandaiyē yāvumā mādalāl yādideṉḏṟu nādalē yōvudal yāvumeṉa vōr. பதச்சேதம்: அகந்தை உண்டாயின், அனைத்தும் உண்டாகும்; அகந்தை இன்றேல், இன்று அனைத்தும். அகந்தையே யாவும் ஆம். ஆதலால், யாது இது என்று நாடலே ஓவுதல் யாவும் என ஓர். Padacchēdam (word-separation): ahandai uṇḍāyiṉ, aṉaittum uṇḍāhum; ahandai iṉḏṟēl, iṉḏṟu aṉaittum. ahandai-y-ē yāvum ām. ādalāl, yādu idu eṉḏṟu nādal-ē ōvudal yāvum eṉa ōr. அன்வயம்: அகந்தை உண்டாயின், அனைத்தும் உண்டாகும்; அகந்தை இன்றேல், அனைத்தும் இன்று. யாவும் அகந்தையே ஆம். ஆதலால், யாது இது என்று நாடலே யாவும் ஓவுதல் என ஓர். Anvayam (words rearranged in natural prose order): ahandai uṇḍāyiṉ, aṉaittum uṇḍāhum; ahandai iṉḏṟēl, aṉaittum iṉḏṟu. yāvum ahandai-y-ē ām. ādalāl, yādu idu eṉḏṟu nādal-ē yāvum ōvudal eṉa ōr. English translation: If the ego comes into existence, everything comes into existence; if the ego does not exist, everything does not exist. [Hence] the ego itself is everything. Therefore, know that investigating what this [ego] is alone is giving up everything. Which ego is he referring to here? The one and only ego there is, namely ourself, so we are that. However this one ego is not what we actually are, but only what we seem to be, so if we investigate ourself keenly enough, we will see what we actually are and hence this one ego will vanish forever, since it does not actually exist, just as an illusory snake would vanish if we were to look at it carefully enough to see that it is actually just a rope. Therefore, since the seeming existence of everything else depends upon the seeming existence of ourself as this ego, and since this ego will cease to exist if we investigate it keenly enough, Bhagavan says, ‘ஆதலால், யாது இது என்று நாடலே ஓவுதல் யாவும்’ (ādalāl, yādu idu eṉḏṟu nādalē yāvum ōvudal), which means, ‘Therefore, investigating what this [ego] is alone is giving up everything’. 3. Upadēśa Undiyār verse 28: when everything else ceases to exist, what remains is only beginningless, infinite and undivided sat-cit-ānanda However, what he means by ‘everything’ in this context is all phenomena, and when the ego and all phenomena cease to exist what remains is only ourself as we actually are, which is anādi (beginningless), ananta (endless, limitless or infinite), akhaṇḍa (unbroken or undivided) sat-cit-ānanda (being-awareness-bliss), as he says in verse 28 of Upadēśa Undiyār: தனாதியல் யாதெனத் தான்றெரி கிற்பின் னனாதி யனந்தசத் துந்தீபற வகண்ட சிதானந்த முந்தீபற. taṉādiyal yādeṉat tāṉḏṟeri hiṯpiṉ ṉaṉādi yaṉantasat tundīpaṟa vakhaṇḍa cidāṉanda mundīpaṟa. பதச்சேதம்: தனாது இயல் யாது என தான் தெரிகில், பின் அனாதி அனந்த சத்து அகண்ட சித் ஆனந்தம். Padacchēdam (word-separation): taṉādu iyal yādu eṉa tāṉ terihil, piṉ aṉādi aṉanta sattu akhaṇḍa cit āṉandam. அன்வயம்: தான் தனாது இயல் யாது என தெரிகில், பின் அனாதி அனந்த அகண்ட சத்து சித் ஆனந்தம். Anvayam (words rearranged in natural prose order): tāṉ taṉādu iyal yādu eṉa terihil, piṉ aṉādi aṉanta akhaṇḍa sattu cit āṉandam. English translation: If one knows what the nature of oneself is, then [what will exist and shine is only] beginningless, endless [or infinite] and undivided sat-cit-ānanda [being-awareness-bliss]. Therefore what remains when everything ceases to exist is not nothingness but the infinite fullness of sat-cit-ānanda, which is what we actually are and what alone is real, even when other things seem to exist. 4. Uḷḷadu Nāṟpadu verse 12: we are not nothingness but pure awareness This is why Bhagavan says in verse 12 of Uḷḷadu Nāṟpadu: அறிவறி யாமையு மற்றதறி வாமே யறியும துண்மையறி வாகா — தறிதற் கறிவித்தற் கன்னியமின் றாயவிர்வ தாற்றா னறிவாகும் பாழன் றறி. aṟivaṟi yāmaiyu maṯṟadaṟi vāmē yaṟiyuma duṇmaiyaṟi vāhā — daṟitaṟ kaṟivittaṟ kaṉṉiyamiṉ ḏṟāyavirva dāṯṟā ṉaṟivāhum pāṙaṉ ṟaṟi. பதச்சேதம்: அறிவு அறியாமையும் அற்றது அறிவு ஆமே. அறியும் அது உண்மை அறிவு ஆகாது. அறிதற்கு அறிவித்தற்கு அன்னியம் இன்றாய் அவிர்வதால், தான் அறிவு ஆகும். பாழ் அன்று. அறி. Padacchēdam (word-separation): aṟivu aṟiyāmaiyum aṯṟadu aṟivu āmē. aṟiyum adu uṇmai aṟivu āhādu. aṟidaṟku aṟivittaṟku aṉṉiyam iṉḏṟāy avirvadāl, tāṉ aṟivu āhum. pāṙ aṉḏṟu. aṟi. English translation: What is devoid of knowledge and ignorance [about anything other than oneself] is actually knowledge [or awareness]. That which knows [anything other than oneself] is not real knowledge [or awareness]. Since it shines without another for knowing or for causing to know [or causing to be known], oneself is [real] knowledge [or awareness]. It is not a void [or nothingness]. Know [or be aware]. Therefore you need not have any fear about ‘total and complete nothingness’, because no such thing exists, and because when the ego ceases to exist there will be no one left to experience even a seeming nothingness, since what remains then is only what we actually are, which is pure and infinite self-awareness (awareness that is not aware of anything other than itself). (In this connection you may find it useful to read a more detailed article I wrote on this subject: Self-knowledge is not a void (śūnya).) 5. Uḷḷadu Nāṟpadu verse 31: the jñāni is aware of nothing other than itself, so our mind cannot grasp its perspective Regarding your question about my remark that in the view of the jñāni he alone exists, though we mistake the jñāni to be a person, it is not actually any such thing. As Bhagavan often used to say, jñāna alone is the jñāni, which means that pure self-awareness (ātma-jñāna) alone is what is aware of itself. Since nothing other than pure self-awareness exists in its view, our outward-facing mind is unable to comprehend it adequately, which is why Bhagavan says in verse 31 of Uḷḷadu Nāṟpadu: தன்னை யழித்தெழுந்த தன்மயா னந்தருக் கென்னை யுளதொன் றியற்றுதற்குத் — தன்னையலா தன்னிய மொன்று மறியா ரவர்நிலைமை யின்னதென் றுன்ன லெவன். taṉṉai yaṙitteṙunda taṉmayā ṉandaruk keṉṉai yuḷadoṉ ḏṟiyaṯṟudaṟkut — taṉṉaiyalā taṉṉiya moṉḏṟu maṟiyā ravarnilaimai yiṉṉadeṉ ḏṟuṉṉa levaṉ. பதச்சேதம்: தன்னை அழித்து எழுந்த தன்மயானந்தருக்கு என்னை உளது ஒன்று இயற்றுதற்கு? தன்னை அலாது அன்னியம் ஒன்றும் அறியார்; அவர் நிலைமை இன்னது என்று உன்னல் எவன்? Padacchēdam (word-separation): taṉṉai aṙittu eṙunda taṉmaya-āṉandarukku eṉṉai uḷadu oṉḏṟu iyaṯṟudaṟku? taṉṉai alādu aṉṉiyam oṉḏṟum aṟiyār; avar nilaimai iṉṉadu eṉḏṟu uṉṉal evaṉ? அன்வயம்: தன்னை அழித்து எழுந்த தன்மயானந்தருக்கு இயற்றுதற்கு என்னை ஒன்று உளது? தன்னை அலாது அன்னியம் ஒன்றும் அறியார்; அவர் நிலைமை இன்னது என்று உன்னல் எவன்? Anvayam (words rearranged in natural prose order): taṉṉai aṙittu eṙunda taṉmaya-āṉandarukku iyaṯṟudaṟku eṉṉai oṉḏṟu uḷadu? taṉṉai alādu aṉṉiyam oṉḏṟum aṟiyār; avar nilaimai iṉṉadu eṉḏṟu uṉṉal evaṉ? English translation: For those who are [blissfully immersed in and as] tanmayānanda [‘happiness composed of that’, namely our real self], which rose [as ‘I am I’] destroying themself [the ego], what one [action] exists for doing? They do not know [or experience] anything other than themself; [so] who can [or how to] conceive their state as ‘it is such’? As you rightly point out, there is no person remaining there to say what the perspective of the jñāni is, so if we want to know what its perspective actually is, we must turn within to see ourself and thereby to merge in and as the pure self-awareness (ātma-jñāna) that we actually are. 6. Uḷḷadu Nāṟpadu verse 33: the ‘I’ that rises to say ‘I have seen’ has seen nothing Regarding the people whom David Godman interviewed in some of his videos, who you say ‘were smiling and talking about their wonderful experiences as when their ego was destroyed’, there is a saying in Tamil, ‘கண்டவர் விண்டில்லை; விண்டவர் கண்டில்லை’ (kaṇḍavar viṇḍillai; viṇḍavar kaṇḍillai), which means ‘those who have seen do not say [or open their mouth]; those who say [or open their mouth] have not seen’. And as Bhagavan says in verse 33 of Uḷḷadu Nāṟpadu: என்னை யறியேனா னென்னை யறிந்தேனா னென்ன னகைப்புக் கிடனாகு — மென்னை தனைவிடய மாக்கவிரு தானுண்டோ வொன்றா யனைவரனு பூதியுண்மை யால். eṉṉai yaṟiyēṉā ṉeṉṉai yaṟindēṉā ṉeṉṉa ṉahaippuk kiḍaṉāhu — meṉṉai taṉaiviḍaya mākkaviru tāṉuṇḍō voṉḏṟā yaṉaivaraṉu bhūtiyuṇmai yāl. பதச்சேதம்: ‘என்னை அறியேன் நான்’, ‘என்னை அறிந்தேன் நான்’ என்னல் நகைப்புக்கு இடன் ஆகும். என்னை? தனை விடயம் ஆக்க இரு தான் உண்டோ? ஒன்று ஆய் அனைவர் அனுபூதி உண்மை ஆல். Padacchēdam (word-separation): ‘eṉṉai aṟiyēṉ nāṉ’, ‘eṉṉai aṟindēṉ nāṉ’ eṉṉal nahaippukku iḍaṉ āhum. eṉṉai? taṉai viḍayam ākka iru tāṉ uṇḍō? oṉḏṟu āy aṉaivar aṉubhūti uṇmai āl. அன்வயம்: ‘நான் என்னை அறியேன்’, ‘நான் என்னை அறிந்தேன்’ என்னல் நகைப்புக்கு இடன் ஆகும். என்னை? தனை விடயம் ஆக்க இரு தான் உண்டோ? அனைவர் அனுபூதி உண்மை ஒன்றாய்; ஆல். Anvayam (words rearranged in natural prose order): ‘nāṉ eṉṉai aṟiyēṉ’, ‘nāṉ eṉṉai aṟindēṉ’ eṉṉal nahaippukku iḍaṉ āhum. eṉṉai? taṉai viḍayam ākka iru tāṉ uṇḍō? aṉaivar aṉubhūti uṇmai oṉḏṟu āy; āl. English translation: Saying ‘I do not know myself’ [or] ‘I have known myself’ is ground for ridicule. Why? To make oneself an object known, are there two selves? Because being one is the truth of everyone’s experience. Therefore we should be very sceptical about anyone who claims ‘I have known myself’ or ‘I have experienced what remains after the ego is annihilated’. As you rightly point out, if the ego has been eradicated, who remains there to say ‘I’ have experienced anything? Whatever ‘I’ makes such claims can only be the ego, because what we actually are is infinite self-awareness, other than which nothing actually exists, so how could it make any such claims, and to whom could it make them? Therefore as Bhagavan says, all such claims are ‘ground for ridicule’. However, we need not concern ourself with the seeming self-ignorance or egotism of others, because those others seem to exist only in the outward-turned view of ourself as this ego, so all we need be concerned with is investigating ourself in order to find out what we ourself actually are and thereby free ourself from the clutches of this self-ignorant ego that we now seem to be.

@PurpleTree so you are forced by nothingness..., so be it. If you ok with that I am ok as well😊. Good night (it's late here)😘.

seemingly appearing via the nothingness of seem less appearances in a desire to have a "separate" forum. For reasons of nothingness sharing's thru the seemingly appearing of words that describing nothing as it goes on and on thru the vastness of seemingly endless loops of appearances disappearing as we scrolling endlessly sharing nothingness.Oh God I'm Lost!

Non-duality is something that can latch on to the egoic mind identity and turn it into another theory, idea and concept. Another religion. I try not to focus on the stuff that can make way for the egoic mind to make an identity out of it. Would be cool though, so we can have a place where all the non-dualists can be ridiculed for our no one, illusion and nothingness talk. The Absolute sub-forum for non-dualists.

"If you only knew the magnificence of the 3, 6, and 9, then you would have a key to the universe." – Nikola Tesla What’s the deal with numbers like 3, 6, and 9—or any other spiritual numbers that seem to hold some kind of hidden magic? People often talk about how certain frequencies or number combinations keep showing up in the universe. Consider the ubiquitous triangle, for instance, the Sierpiński Triangle, a fractal geometry that continuously replicates itself. Triangular forms seem to possess a profound resonance with the structural logic of the universe, appearing not as mere coincidence but as an intrinsic component of its design. Do these numbers and shapes embody some deeper cosmic order? Does anyone have further elucidation on the nature of these recurring numerical and geometric phenomena? Does it have any meaning or magnificence? 0 – Nothingness: The void, the primordial absence, the potential of all that could be, yet undisturbed, untouched by existence. 1 – The Self: The singular entity, the individuated fragment, the first point of awareness, a being unto itself, the "I" that perceives. 2 – Duality: The birth of contrast, the division of self and other. In this split, a space is created—a dynamic tension where connection, relationship, and love are possible, as two opposites seek harmony. 3 – The Child: The synthesis, the creation born from duality. A portal to dimensions—space, time, and reality itself. The emergence of distinction, the beginning of structure, and the interplay of forces that shape our world.

@Princess Arabia Yes, I know all this. I don't however want to write long posts trying to explain or justify God as Nothingness (even though even this is not accurate). So I explain it quickly but some people misunderstand that. It's been stated again and again, God is the infinite void from which everything arises. We know this, so I'd rather not go into this again and again when trying to write a quick post.

When moment of dying comes remember my words. Thought create fear and time. There is nothing else. If at moment of death you are conscious of this and you are able to not generate fear you Will stay in Yourself and attain mukti/Nirvana/nothingness permanently. If you are not able then you Will reincarnate and Will have to suffer another cycle like most suckers 🤣😅 So heres a Gift of me for you 👑Take advantage of it that Im Still embodied and sharing exclusive wisdom. This Will not be forever. I have a departure date so take the train before its gone. Because The point of a Guru like me is that you dont have to do any of the soul grueling sadhana he has done. He does It for you. The Only thing you have to do is to tie Yourself to him like there is no other thing worthwhile getting tied to. When moment is aproppiate I will cut the cord for you. You dont have to worry about that.

No, it's because you are not ready to let go the self. That's why Leo can do 1000 times 5 meo and he says: you are god dreaming the reality for love. Because he open himself to the unlimited but the self is still there. No drug can dissolve the self, it's absolutely impossible. Only the self can be ready for dropping itself in the nothingness. Usually the self is going to use any trick to preserve itself, becoming god or anything else

It doesn't matter if you realize no self and nothingness you still need to survive as the human you are dreaming yourself to be. That's if you care about survival at least. If you go without food for days your stomach isn't going to care if you're enlightened.