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Tate is not a good example to emulate. His success is not possible to replicate for most people so you can say he got lucky. Such people become traps. People want to be them but never become like them. As a result they waste their time chasing empty dreams and losing sight of practical achievable goals. Some folks are inspired by Tate to get out of bed. Haha. I get that. Do you really need Tate to motivate you when there are other coaches and guides and sports personalities, motivational speakers who can do the same. Why Tate? Here is the crux. Tate appeals to masses of people who have a certain shadow in them, who think like him. They want someone relatable. Others are too sophisticated to be relatable. What are the consequences? Well. If it's not visible yet, to begin with, you could find yourself in a puddle of gigantic trouble if the circumstances of Tate were replicated, he has money, fame, lawyers, his immorality might not be a big thorn, this cannot be an ideal path for most, both socially and conscience-wise. Because either of them will get to you first. You would end up spending decades in prison, he is quite privileged, literally every famous person is obviously. That's why emulating Tate is more of a trap and less of a gift. He is an illusion that will either stay an illusion, or disappear into nothingness in a fraction of time. Only future will tell. Till then it's best to follow someone who is risk free and conscience friendly.

Awakening comes from not knowing, because there is no you to know anything. Your birth, enlightenment, entire duality comes from knowing. But you are nothing, nothing can never be known, can just be. Therefore, anything that you know is something, but nothing can never be learn, can just be. Therefore you are already awake. Only when you not know, you can be. If you know “nothing” (that doesn’t mean you dont know because of ignorance), you are before birth. Fully not knowing is being nothing. And these all words, sounds, visuals, entire duality are nothing. Therefore whatever you do is awakening, because of that you are already awake. Therefore enlightenment is . Therefore enlightenment is ahahdjduaizjncosmajan. Both sentences are identical, because both sentences are nothing, appears within nothingness therefore identical, as your body and chair. Dont forget you learn what is body and chair, which is still comes from knowing. If you not know what is chair and body, they are identical. Whatever happens, it happens within nothingness. Nothing is pure consciousness. Nothing is nothing, therefore absolute. Peace!

Hi! After having powerful experiences on heroic doses of psilocybin mushrooms, weed has gotten seriously psychedelic for me. As long as I take a moderate dose and not a really low one, I can get into fractal energetic yoga, and I realize that everything are just appearances and stories that are timeless and non-existent. It feels like insanity, but it's an insanity that realizes that the sanity it contradicts was just an illusion that never occured in the first place, which led me to start calling it Insanity with a capital I. In my day to day consciousness I don't feel all too enlightened which is why I find it remarkable that a little bit of sativa can get me so far. Is anybody else having seriously spiritual awakenings from moderate doses of marijuana? Some links: This is the thread about my heroic dose that I think opened me up to reach these stages: This is what I mean when I say fractal energetic yoga:

Poor guy is stuck in nothingness void I can tell by his profile

It has been a lot of time now, since I have discontinued from this forum. Leo's teaching has influenced me a lot in every phase of my life since I have started following him first time around 2015. After more than a year just watching his different videos which had the knowledge and deep understanding of about almost everything.. I have started being a part of this forum. Whenever I had time, I used to very curiously read the new posts in almost all sections of the forum and read the answers Leo gives or any other person. Being an introvert initially, I was not good at expressing myself and it was more about following the content and listening to different voices. At one point of time, it felt like I was following him too much that I was saying the same words that Leo says in his videos.. And It was just too much so gradually I found other great masters to listen to, and that also gave me a new perspective of Leo's work, Now I could see deeper layer of his work. I started writing my journal of this forum and made a lot of posts there, I was trying to express intense emotions I felt while on meditations. One day I found a person who felt like my own part in a feminine body and It has never been boring with her since then. After she came to my life, everything has been completely transformed.. Who I was then and who I am now is complete different, She has grown me not just spiritually but also helped me push through scores of barriers in my emotional and material growth. I really thought this forum to be not useful for me anymore, so I discontinues. I also had to learn through experience about my orange and green phase of spiral dynamics. At that time I strongly associated myself with orange values and since most people on this forum seems like green stage, got into conflicts with me just for the ideology and ego. I also had a lot of ego. I had a little spur of enlightenment before her, but now I constantly live in an enlightened flow experience. I constantly get out of these experiences, yet again find it soon, It's like i know that place of nothingness, where I can rest in calm of solitude, or sometimes even remain alert in the crowded noises. Everything feels so new and a lucid sense of experience starts to touch you, where you feel completely accomplished, and there is complete bliss. But even after seated in such an experience, My mind still returns to its castle and still sometimes can demand like a child, my mind certainly has not been a very disciplined one. Sooner or later it starts to feel pain for desiring one thing or another, things that it has experienced and which were more addictive to any drugs. When you are experiencing bliss at all times, when you pursue a new pleasure, it also mixes in this bliss, making this intensely more pleasing and addictive. that's why it become harder and harder for an enlightened person to push their boundaries. Everything starts giving a new experience, body has a different kind of energy and mind has already found its most natural state of bliss.

5meo dmt shoots me into nothingness, it crushes me into full submission, then I reborn, then I cry and laugh, then I feel one with the world and I love life. 5meomalt doesn’t do any of that to me: it feels like MDMA on steroids, a feeling of love that is so overwhelming that I want to cry, but also, if you allow it to let it be erotic, it’s extremely powerful and arousing. I’d have to mention that I smoke 5meoDmT (100mg freebase of the real toad venom) whereas I do 5meomalt sublingual (50mg salt). I’ve done the toad 6 times, malt 10 times. 2 very, very different chemicals for me, which is why I don’t understand why people often describe Malt as a feminine version of toad.

Relative to my understanding today, yes. I still had moments way beyond nonduality back then. But I had not fully deconstructed nonduality yet. My comprehension of what Consciousness is has increased by orders of magnitude. You cannot grasp what Consciousness is by reducing it via nonduality. Your reduction of Consciousness to Nothingness or Emptiness is not really what Consciousness is. That's yet another trick that Consciousness plays. Consciousnes is imagining that that reduction is the end of understanding Consciousness. But that's just a clever trick. You have to be smart enough not to fall for it.

Hyper idealistic solipsism is wrong. This is the main theme of this post. Before we get to that, I see some people on the forum getting surprised or confused about leo's recent remarks on Aliens consciousnesess. Him 'opening a portal inside his skull to a colorful Infinite Cartoon landscape full of striped and polka-dotted sentient Alien creatures doing cartwheeels, backflips, and helicoptering around.' then claming 'I have Awoken to an Infinite dreamscape of pure fun and Love!' This is nothing to be surprised about. Leo already made clear his 'complete awakening' is subscribing to the notion of 'mind only' sect of non duality. His psychedelic sessions make one thing clear: Non duality. But what it confused him is that 'MY mind is the only thing I can be sure of and reality is ONLY composed of the concoction of my mind. The figments of imagination are all there is and the same is true for every other imaginary human mind. There is no 'ultimate reality' DIFFERENT from what I see, observe, touch, feel, generate in my experience' See, all of this hyper idealistic solipsism arises out of the mistaken assumption he made at the start of his psychedelic explorations years ago. 'Nothing exists but MY mind' - He makes it sure that there is no ultimate reality OUTSIDE of 'my mind' and everyone is responsible for 'their' minds. You guys are 'stuck in yout own dreams' while 'I' have broken through alien levels of awakening AND no human on this earth could ever possibly conceive of. I guess not even when said people spend 20 years using 10x more 5 Meo Dmts Leo does. He must have this 'special' intuition skills very few people on this earth is even capable of. This is the current paradigm and worldview of Leo in the way that I can see and understand.Feel free to make it more accurate. I do know what he is talking about tho as someone who has ACTUAL meditation skills and has had many experiences with different psychedelics. --- The fact of the matter is actually even more profound than what Leo make it sound like. There is an ultimate reality BEYOND your human consciousness can EVER comprehend. I'm not talking about 'using psychedelics and attaining transhuman levels of understanding' like Leo. All the alien and mickey mouse and portal into my head sorta experiences are concoctions of your brain and mind. Just like this mainstream everyday reality of chairs and tables and couches are concoctions of one's mind as well. YOU CAN'T EXPERIENCE AND DIRECTLY COMPREHEND THE ULTIMATE REALITY (which is NOT only your personal solipsistic concoction) WITH YOUR EXISTING BRAIN AND PSYCHEDELICS AND MEDITATION TECHNIQUES. Full stop. Ever. What we do as spiritual practitioners with our psychedelics, meditations and whatnot is to get INSIGHTS and understandings INDIRECTLY (via inference and demolisihing of our mind created illusions) to get the MOST accurate and closest approximation to what Ultimate reality is like. Of course, Leo would object here and say 'There is no ultimate reality 'outside' of your personal mind' Of course, he would. But the problem is that just because you CAN'T access any reality DIRECTLY, DOESNT mean that that reality outside of your 'personal' mind and conscious experiences DOESNT exist. Leo's positions is akin to how someone would say 'This Eros planet doesnt exist. We can observe this earth, moon, venus etc but this eros planet you are talking about is a complete fiction of your mind. Why do you assume this Eros planet's existece. I don't observe such planet via telescopes' Well just because you 'dont observe' it doesnt mean it doesnt exist. We don't make an 'assumption' of an ultimate reality beyond our personal 'mind', Spiritual insights of emptiness, no self, impermanence and nothingness PROVIDES said inference necessary to know with absolute certainty that the reality that 'YOUR' personal mind is an absolute illusion and is your brain's 'best guess' at what this ultimate reality (which impinges on your mind and your mind is an intimately part of) might actually be like. But it is a complete farce. Your alien awakenings, mickey mouses and portals in to your head are fun little creations of your personal mind. But NOT what is ultimately true. Actually your human brain and your psychedelics CANT hope to directly perceive ultimate reality and 'Truth' Due to your strongly entrenched solipsistic way of perceiving reality, it will be challenging to accept what you value as 'complete awakening of aliens' is actually nonsensical but I do understand why you feel that way if you have such a solipsistic tendency within 'mind only' school of non duality. ---- You need to make actual arguments as to WHY for instance if a car (which is construct of your personal mind, right?) hits you with and your body flies away to god knows where. Or how you can't walk though walls. Those set of rules of consistency is NOT just how this 'dream' operates. It is a set of rules THAT IMPINGES on your personal mind and body. Those limitations are hard wired VIA the ultimate reality which is outside of your mind. If you assert no such limitations actually exists and you simply need to be 'more awake' to control the gravity and 'walking through walls' and whatnot, feel free to spend the rest of your life consuming 10.000 psychedelics in the hopes of actually making these work. You'll fail miserably and come to know the limitations of your mind only sect of non duality. --- Anyways, I can continue on but this is, in my opinion, where Leo is going the wrong path. There is no particular reason to be surprised or shocked as the signals of such a transformation to alien awakening and portals into my mind and 'I'm the most awakened being' on this planet were there prior to this transformation. Feel free to provide your arguments but this is not a criticism post actually. I just wanted to share how I view things. Much love,

So lately i been noticing each time trying to browser the forum that Leo doesn't like Buddhism anymore as far as i remember he used to speak highly about non duality and Buddhist teaching and so on, am i right ? am i miss remembering, when was the turning point, what did happen, is non duality at the core of god realization, and if we are all nothingness why Solipsism is a thing, if enlightenment is not awakening, wtf is this lol like seriously how can you be enlighten but not awake, i just hope to get an explanation of what is going on well ultimately all ideas collapse why there is a controversy and when is leo's awakening course coming ? and does leo think the budda was awake now lol and why leo language became too harsh with his vlogs ? i understand that leo taking the work to being truth to people very seriously but i dont see that he is communicating that in the right way my journey to self actualization have shifted me as a person and the more i meditate and do yoga there more i can see how am nothingness and reality is non dual what is wrong with that , and in my personality am healing more am becoming more understanding and empathetic in my day to day life i would love to know if am doing anything wrong or there are even better ways to live and self actualized

@Ash55 Buddhism is obsessed with peace and nothingness so it is quite limited and shallow. Traditional Nonduality is not deep and direct enough but it is still way better than buddhim.

lol lol but i really feel like leo have changed,i bet most of us here love him and care about truth i dont think there is a need for harsh language, and no need for bashing on Buddhism and non duality since all of ideas and thoughts and worlds are ultimately nothingness, and any system has it it own limitation

God is not a guy who is watching reality, it is the reality. what exist is nothingness organizing itself into complex patterns of existence. a miracle. God is the subatomic particles that form atoms, it is the hydrogen nebulae that organize the stellar systems, and it is life, the extreme complexity. God is, and the fact of being is perfect joy. for god to be those hungry children is absolute perfection. the complexity of what a human is is unimaginable. we see everything according to what we like and dislike, this for existence is nothing, suffering has nothing negative, it is pure love, like rot, or a supernova, or cutting your nails. existence of infinite depth and absolutely perfect. We just have to realize it.

Yes. But Mary if she meditates a lot inside the dream and takes psychedelic inside the dream she can expande her small personal mind so much that it becomes the Dream-Generating Dream, she can realize that here limited mind is a facade but when she gets rid of personal ego and expands her consciousness via meditation and psychedelics she can realize the nature of a dream, that it is totally imagined by her. She can grasp how all the possibilities possible are within her Grand Mind (not her personal mind) as a potential, and that out of this Nothingness/Grand Mind everything is generated. Yes, all the experiences and all the coffee tables inside the dream of Mary are just imaginations/figments of her Mind. And she can realize that all the potentials that can be generated by her Mind is the Ultimate Reality. Yes, all the concoctions of personal mind of Mary are illusions, but her realized Grand Mind that is generating a dream is The Ultimate Reality. Yes, Mary can train herself via meditation and psychedelics inside the dream so that she sees at all time that this is a dream generated by her Mind, at which point she is Awakened and the dream becomes a lucid dream. But all of the above do not contradict Absolute Solipsism, and only make it even more probable/elegant. Leo's claim is not that there is nothing outside Mary's personal mind inside the dream. The claim is that when Mary becomes lucid during her dream, she knows for sure that her Grand Mind is the only Mind there is. That there is no other Mind generating this dream other than her own.

Okay I understand, thanks for clarifying. The issue is that lets say again that Lucy goes to sleep at night and has a dream that she is Mary. Now Mary inside the dream realizes that it is a only a nightly dream and that she creates this dream landscape in a dream with her mind. Inside the dream she meets @ardacigin and he says to her that "there is other reality, Ultimate Reality beyond this dream, the world of Lucy". But inside the dream when Mary realizes that she is Lucy and that there is a normal reality when she would wake up that is A BELIEF. That is not a direct experience. The direct experience of Mary is that this nightly dream is all there is and that currently no normal reality is "waiting for her" until she wakes up. I understand what you are saying, and I still am not sure of those insights because I need more 5meo deep trips, but if I were to steelman a Leo's position, I would say that when I sleep at night, the landscape that I generate is all there is and that for some time, this normal reality is not existing. And I don't see how you can escape that. The sovereignty of you direct experience is inescapable. Even when you have an intuitive insight/experience of this Ultimate Reality, that is still inside your mind. You can not have any experience or insight that is outside of your mind. The Nothingness is The Mind that everything is generated inside.

@HojoEasier said then done, like i never want to go back to the void again but i think that's because my ego was fighting it. In the void you're like some form of god but i think it's not the max level, in the void you instantly get all the insights about basically everything. But i remember i had a pov of this infinite being in the void that reached its limit about its existence, and also a pov from infinite "blackness/nothingness". So i had both povs. Even though i was the only one there, i feel like there is more and somebody else was still in control as when i stopped my heart i was lead through these experiences. And even in david Hawkins books void calibrates around 850, so i think even if you're in the void god is still in control. I also felt like this infinite being in the void was fully automatic that kept pushing itself into different dreams. While being this infinite red colored being, this vibrations were extremely slow and powerful. Oh now i just remembered what it represented, it represented the vein just like in your brain. Basically you were inside your own "brain" seeing that red vein vibrating and nothingness/blackness, it's like your body that you have right now is GOD but i don't know why i got pushed/shown that i was this vein/vibration in the void. It was like i was everything and everything was inside me. It's like you're a mind in nothingness that studies itself here. Yeah i think that's what void is, it's god giving you more control over your body and you are becoming this vein/vibration/energy in nothingness but it is actually somewhere in your own body. Perhaps call Leo or other members to discuss the void, and if they have any more information on that.

@Arthogaan I can only talk from my experience and understanding, i think there is only "one" in the dream which is you who will start waking up and becoming more and more conscious towards your death. All your life experiences and karma that you set yourself up with, are set for you to experience yourself and understand yourself from lower levels as gods/your thoughts only become materialized at these levels. You set it up in a way that eventually you will wake up from your dream and go back to (source) , from the source you will go back to astral. The astral is a place where the source projects itself for like 99.9% and this is where you get your own astral form, this is where you start creating things with your "original" thought. In the astral form you're nothing more then an energy creating whatever it wants in nothingness. When you become more and more conscious in the physical form is when you start judging your past actions of your previous unconscious self, and you're the only one that does the judging of yourself. But you also understand that it wasn't entirely your fault, and this is also the point where you should drastically start to improve as you start realizing that others are yourself. Jesus quotes - In Matthew 5:42 “Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you.” - love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. and so on. From my understanding the way you will leave to source is you will just be catapulted with the energy of billions nukes until you're everything and you will be floating in the source in incredible ecstasy. How do i know? I actually experienced something similar 2 days ago which might be connected to your post. I was close to falling asleep when suddenly, you know how the psychedelics comeup comes when you're laying in bed? Like suddenly alot of energy get projected into you? Well i was close to falling asleep sober when suddenly i experienced a force of like 100 nukes take over my body and i thought i would be catapulted out, which felt really great. But then i stayed in my body and i got a picture shown from the movie "martyrs" it's like a tunnel that represented the source at the end. After that my body had a nice loving energy all over my body and i fell asleep. The only thing we can do, is surrender and trust in god with everything that we have. I think this is the only way.

"When a piece of seemingly solid matter like a human hand is placed under a microscope, we can see that it is made up of molecules. As we move closer, we see atoms, the tiny shadowy balls dancing around their fixed locations. And now we focus on one of the atoms; its interior is lightly veiled by a cloud of electrons. We come closer, increasing the magnification. The shell dissolves and we look on the inside to find… nothing. Somewhere within that emptiness, we know is a nucleus. We scan the space, and there it is, a tiny dot. At last, we have discovered something hard and solid, a reference point. But no! as we move closer to the nucleus, it too begins to dissolve. It too is nothing more than an oscillating field, waves of rhythm. Inside the nucleus are other organized fields: protons, neutrons, even smaller “particles.” Each of these, upon our approach, also dissolve into pure rhythm." - George Leonard, The Silent Pulse

Do you think it doesn't work like that because once you realize you're god you turn into nothingness and merge with the infinite divine will? So anything less then infinite power is however possible, right? Like for example God dreaming up Jesus, he won't have infinite power because he's the dream of god but because god dreams itself as all powerfull in manifestation that is however possible, right?

So i finally decided to take 100mg of mdma which was half the pill, and i laid on some cushions in my computer room. After 1hour i started to notice some slight effects just like on "lsd" but without the transition comeup. I tried as hard as possible to surrender while listening to music, some slight loving bodily sensation was felt for couple of minutes just like on low dose lsd and that was it. After that no matter how hard i tried to surrender, it didn't do much... I felt like this 100mg dose wasn't far from my baseline consciousness so i decided to take 200mg or a whole pill more. After taking it i decided to move to my bedroom and lay on the bed, after around 30-45min i said to myself "it doesn't work", and just when i said that the comeup came even harder then on the highest dose of lsd i ever had. The comeup was god's presence or extreme energy of becoming more conscious that sent me to another consciousness level. When this comeup came and lasted for like 10 seconds, my thoughts tell me to put on my clothes and go outside because i'm in a different timeline/consciousness right now. So i put on my clothes and look outside through every window in my house, i don't see anyone outside or hear a noise. I go to my backyard really fast and put my scooter helm on so i could drive on my scooter, i turn the scooter on and the engine starts running but when i turn the gas handle to drive forward on my scooter it doesn't work.... It's like god is preventing me to drive it, then in my thoughts i say "wtf" how is this possible and when i said that the gas handle started working again. I drive like 10meters in my backyard, and my thoughts keep preventing me from driving further. So i put the scooter back and put off my helm. I went outside and started walking, walking didn't take any effort or energy it's like i could walk forever and my body felt light or like nothingness. It was like i was an ascended master, not putting out any energy on walking. So while i was walking people appeared again, and i was witnessing how all these people and the things they were doing are god's constructs. I was the only conscious being alive, and others are me. While walking a car drove by, the car sounded extremely realistic almost like it was an imaginary construct. So i walked for like 1km/1mile not far from my parents house and suddenly out of nowhere i felt like i was dieng from extreme thirst and was about to pass out, the thrist was so extreme that i couldn't do anything anymore and i felt like running into peoples house to drink some water. While that was happening, god was showing that i could die and he can setup my death anyway he wanted. And i realized i couldn't get help because it's all god around me. I knew why god did this, and i told him please make it stop i'm dieng from thirst, i swear i'm gonna go to my parents and apologise if you make it stop. Just when i said it, suddenly the extreme thirst was gone and i felt again like an ascended master and walked towards my parents house. While walking to my parents house, i see how the things that have been said to me by others is gods doing. Like for example how my friend told me before my trip that had mdma before, that when you take it you will want to walk. Or how i've read if you take mdma you have to drink coconut water with elektrolytes because you might get thirsty. This was all god constructing reality all around me preparing me for this experience. So now i'm at my mothers house and my stepdad opens the door, then i started apologizing to him for everything that i did and then he called my mom. My mom came and i hugged her and started apologizing, while i was away for 1 year and didn't have any contact she lost all her teeth and had a heart infarct at work. My thoughts told me, that it was also her karma for the things that she did and now she is clean. We talked, and i decided to tell her what happend and how god made me come here again. Then she started talking and for the first time in my life i finally could see in her that her base consciousness was raised. She said that she went to church often and prayed that i would come back, she said that god told her that she was asking for too much. But her prayer was answered and i was forced by god to go to her house i think by making me thrist and asking me where i went. Then i started telling her about my life and the things that i experienced with god, she said that i was putting too much pressure on people with my talk because i knew so much. She said you should keep everything to yourself unless god gives you the right to teach others, she said everyone is on a different ladder of consciousness and you shouldn't interfere unless they are interested themselves. When she said that, i realized that she was right. Some people want to be where they're at, and interfering with their lives can actually put them in different situations but do they really want that? If i would force myself on my mother and show her a whole new world, that would change her life. But how would her life be after that? How would her relationship be with her stepdad? Perhaps her path would change and the relationship with her husband would change. Do i really want that? I guess god was talking through her, and i should listen to god. *Also when i was walking on mdma, i felt extreme peace every step i took. It was like i was liberated from any suffering and was just watching these people like they were part of me god and that i created them. There was 1 guy mowing his grass, i walked past him and didn't hear any sound. There were people talking to eachother and i didn't hear them, they just stared at me when i walked by. All the sound was only created when it was close to me or i allowed it to be created. Never felt such peace as i took every step. *also no teeth grinding or any other symptoms while i was on high dose of mdma, nothing... I was just myself in higher consciousness

Hi lonewanderer. I decided to take 5MeO ( Bufo) in 2020.age 37 I had never heard of psychedelics and drugs were a big no no at the time. I had embarked on finding out how to discern truth ( from the point of view about winning an argument about the non existence of god with a Christian). Ironically I ended up dissolving my reality during a meditation and came face to face with ‘infinity’. I had heard Leo talking about 5MeO on his videos while I was looking at them from a philosophy 101 perspective and so I went and read about what other people were saying about the drug. That it could induce the experience of no self and a state of awareness prior to reality. And so I tried it to make the comparison with my natural experience. With the exception of the intense energy, the experience was the same. Near death, no body, no perception, just a swirl of being nothingness. I had done a lot of contemplation and intellectual deconstruction before ever taking any psychedelic so I was able to observe without getting caught up in it. It is very intense especially for a first time psychedelic experience. In order to take it I had to go to an ayahuasca ceremony which I had no interest in. The ayahuasca didn’t really do anything for me but opened up a connection with other people. I’ve done 5MeO four times and I really don’t get anything from it other than this state. everyone’s preferred medicine or tool is different. I do a lot of my contemplation work with mushrooms and if I want to go further into the god head… strangely it is cannabis that does it for me ( only done it twice but most profound realisations have come from that) I can’t advise for or against other than to be careful as Bufo doses too high can be dangerous. if I’m talking to someone who’s curious about psychedelics I usually say to start with a low dose of mushrooms while being supervised by an experienced sitter just so you can learn to navigate the space comfortably.

(Manifest) Reality is also clearly biased: Despite the physical universe winding down towards more Entropy (or basically every energy/matter evenly mixed and distributed), on pretty much every other level it winds up: Evolution from atoms to molecules to bacteria to plants to animals to humans, from stoneage to larger neoltihic groups, to ancient states and empires, industrial age, information age, and onwards to a completely unforeseeable future. Upload to some subtle realms , infinite other dimensions to be explored, and all that stuff. We are not walking on a planet where there have been 500 civilizations that all failed, blown themselves up in nuclear war, and started again in stone age. Such a game is possible, in which we would dig out ruins that we know nothing about, since they are the 462 restart of 4 millions years ago, where no informations have survived what happened but only some stone ruins. No, this here is the first try, and its still running fine and progressing with incredible speed. Manifest Reality (from everything we see) is clearly biased to "winding up", towards evolution, more complexity, transcendence and love. Ken Wilber calls this drive/tendency of the Universe Eros. Reaching a level of complexity where it also can actually realize itself, happening a long time ago with the first Truly Nondual Realizers (Plotinus, Parmenidies, Nagarjuna, and so on). Infinity/Unmanifest/Nothingness, Big Bang/Involution (see Wilber for Involution), Evolution, trip back home, and once more. The big game of hide and seek. That (Eros, Evolution) is one aspect of reality. An other deep aspect is the unconditional love (Agape) that also runs through the fabric of reality, creating and sustaining all beings on every level. All of us, right here, right now, with incredible complexity. I agree that for example the Assyrians in their attempt to build one of the first really large empires that encompassed many kingdoms and tribes were sometimes very cruel. Reality can not intervene in a physical universe and send some guardian angel from the sky. That would break the game immediately. But is that cruelty still in fashion? It is mostly frowned upon by nearly all people nowadays. That cruelty is not the main tendency of reality. It is the complexity of evolution that sometimes goes sour, of separate beings sacrificing fellow beings for their "Atman-projects", building empires as surrogates for transcendence, as Ken Wilber calls it. And yet, as we see when we look back, these empires were necessary for a larger integration and unity, at least in certain ways. Wilber, Up from Eden: A Transpersonal View of Human Evolution. I think you would like the book. And you are also right in the following aspect: As we see, despite the Horror story, Absolute Reality didn't get broken. "IT" has no moving parts that could get broken. In that way, it didn't care, since it didn't suffer, only contained suffering. That is the Absolute perspective. But when we consider it from a relative perspective (which we do as soon as we think about these events), we can also consider that most aspects and mechanisms of relative reality on the manifest/relative level in fact do wind up (not down), and in a way do care a lot that winding up, evolution, growth/development towards more love, or in general the way home, happens. Water by the River

Pure effortless awareness is very important in everyday “meditation” (let’s call it self-remembering). As soon as “you” lose the awareness, the flow starts to construct “you” on autopilot. But if the awareness is there, five senses are drowning in the perception. “I” starts to dissolve. What do I mean here by “awareness”? When “you” acknowledge any mind activity within, any thought. “You” literally acknowledge how the mind creates and assigns “I”, “me”, “my” and/or “mine” to any activity at play. It always speaks in a possessive case, rather than subjective and objective. When “you” lose this effortless awareness, the thought process starts to create "you" as a separate individual. As soon as this happens, even right at this second, “you” cannot catch and notice it anymore. Now "you" have been formed as a human being. Human being is an illusion. Practice the following: total full relaxation. Thoughts come and go. Notice them and let them go before they start to construct a human being. Before they capture, curve this “I” and start to develop an individual with a story line within space and time. (None of these exist in actuality) You are a collection of thoughts, please notice it. You do not exist as a human without language and conceptual knowledge. Ultimately everything boils down to 5 senses. Remove language. Conceptual level forms you as a human being. All “you” have to do is to develop enough attention to notice this. There is no one at home, nothingness....and "you" do not exist.

You must really love your life if that worries you. I mean, yeah, you're gonna die at some point. Doesn't have to be negative, in fact, it is necessary... you don't want the hell that would be immortality in human form. Do you not look forward to death at all? I romanticize the idea of dying peacefully and becoming a gentle nothingness where I can sleep for eternity as the Universe disappears with me. Just typing it alone makes me feel warmness and love

In order to sustain ITSELF (illusion of body +time +space), conceptual thinking is necessary. Once it is seen as it is, it will fall apart, collapse and deconstruct. NOTHINGNESS. It will “exist” as unseen, unfathomed, infinite potential. IT WONT EXIST AT THE SAME TIME. Non-existence is impossible. It can not be registered. NON-EXISTANCE can only be fathomed in existence. THERE IS NO SUCH THING.

Let's think logically for a minute. IF! as you claim, God is NOTHINGNESS, why would it care to ascribe any meaning to what is? How can nothingness reclaim its power? if whatever you say is true, there is some entity within NOTHINGNESS which wants to reclaim its power. what is this entity? How can NOTHINGNESS contain or control rather than create EVERYTHING as IMAGINATION and ascribe meaning to what is and how it appears to ITSELF. Meaning is a byproduct of thinking.