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@Viking thats not true you will enjoy it because what comes out of you is peace and bliss thats the point of doing it removing suffering

Hey. I would like to say a few things before I start this topic. Enlightenment is not one thing as most believe. There are two types of non dual experience, with a various depths and stages. The types? Void stages and God stages. Void stages include diving deep into the great unknown self. The faceless god, Without quality. God stages include experiences of the face of god. Bliss, love, compassion and etc. Void and god stages also come at varying depths. Mooji for example is in a void stage yet he definitely does not have the same depth that sadhguru or Ramana maharshi have. How do I know this. Asides from experiencing many of these states. I can read energies. All these experiences and states happen due to energetic changes. Normally ones energy becomes more and more subtle, more refined, and dives into pure stillness and then nothingness. There is a qualitative change. A rebirth. Another stage. This process then repeats. How do psychedelics relate to any of this? As I said I am an energy sensitive, and very familiar with these changes and processes. Psychedelics have extremely coarse energies. The consumption of said coarse energies can indeed greatly alter ones experience. Even permanently. These experiences might even be mistaken for true non dual states. They are not. They are static filled simulations. Loud simulations. That although are very flashy. Lack the depth. The maturity, and the clarity of the real things. This is because psychedelics (which I have done a lot of) overpower the system. Damage it. Damage the Nadis or energetic system. Halt the refinement process that leads to true enlightenment. If that was it though. Who cares. Go for it, but that is not it. When psychedelics damage your system and your auric field. They create literal holes in your energetic self. These holes then make you vulnerable to negative energies. Once cognized by mystics as demons and entities. These. Entities then latch onto you, and if you don’t stop. More will come, more will come. Eventually you become so fucked up. You won’t even know what hit you. Deluded. Thinking you are in a non dual states. Because of a psychedelically induced altered state. Some flashy simulation that lacks depth. While bark like a dog and act like a moron like martin ball. You can destroy your life and system. Beyond repair, and gain a ton of karma by doing this shit. Especially in short intervals. Please listen. I say this for no one else will. Nor do they know about he amount of damage these drugs can do. The damage can be undone, however, good luck

I use Colloidal Silver and is life changing. Plannig to buy Ormus that is Colloidal Gold or make it myself. Precious metals in the system are life changing, full of bliss.

@Applejuice You seem overexcited. First of all, stop chasing states. Awakening is not a state or any kind of form including the feeling of bliss (however, it could be accompanied by it). Based on what you are saying I would say you are on the first stage. Neti Neti process is essential starting point and maybe you already learned what you are not from it. However, this is not even a halfway. Now you need to become conscious who you are! And noone can tell you how long may it take. You will need lots of self inquiry and presence as awareness. You need to become conscious of your unlimited nature. You will need to empty your mind. You are trying to achieve smth while meditating instead of being still. Work on that...

Everything you said above was the most honest words I've heard in a while. That was your heart saying all of that, for you to hear, as we start to heal all of this together We are here to love and support you through all of this. Just wanted to say also thank you for writing this, because that is a step closer to living a life of never ending joy and bliss. I know it's hard, but there is good people here to reflect back to you the love that you are destined to give to yourself any time you desire, so that your heart knows it's safe. Sometimes self-love is giving your heart a voice to blame, judge and persecute anybody that has hurt you in your life as much as possible in your head. Allow yourself to be as angry as possible, and as fearful as you can! Let the gates of hell open for all those that ignored, rejected, or overlooked you. This really helped when I was having intense emotions arise in my body after a break up. Once you have "let yourself loose" in this way, take the next step (when the intensity has died down, and this is only optional) and just continue to feel any emotion that arises while realizing that what you are feeling you are healing not only out of yourself, but also others in each moment you are alive, and in each breathe you take. You are healing an entire planet. Then keep repeating it until you feel peaceful, notice how much better you feel if you try. Have a lovely day.

@Slade Follow your heart and follow your bliss. Do whatever makes your heart sing, but don’t indulge in low-consciousness pleasures. You’ll know the difference by how you feel.

exactly, it's eternal (hard to grasp that now, but right there I just felt the infinity) but what brought me to heaven was accepting it for eternity. it was like oh, ok, I'll just be here forever. I'll suffer this pain of death infinitively. this will never end. that's when it went full circle for me and turned back around into infinite bliss

No. I use the stress and convert it into bliss. Depressed people are just people stuck in their minds with a huge opportunity for growth.

I have panic attacks almost everyday. But when you know you grow and re-consolidate your ego frequently you enter that panic attack and bliss arise. Don't run from it, embrace.

Contemplating your own death is such a powerful thing. I have been thinking about my own death for almost every day for some time now. Most of the population lives in a state of unaware denial, and I don't blame them: contemplating your own death is not enforced in our culture, more like the opposite. Death is everywhere: in the news, in movies, TV, books... the "light must win darkness" theme is all over global culture, and for a good reason but STILL people take their lives completely for granted. Every moment when you are not thinking about your death, you are by definition unaware of it. You walk around as you are immortal, death does not touch you and for you it even does not exist. But then you remember.... shit :S. Yeah people die in stories (movies, tv etc.) all the time but thats not death, thats a... thing that happens in stories, it is a mere plot device. I'm lucky to live a life so far where no one that I have a real emotional connection has died. I can only imagine when eventually that happens... man, that will hit home. That will sting BAD and that will be like a lightning of reality right into my guts. I recently had an LSD trip where I remembered "oh yeah, I will die, this crazy joke of life will end and thats it for this body" and at first I kinda laughed at the mystery and weirdness of the whole thing... but then I got serious. VERY serious. I asked myself "What if a doctor told me RIGHT NOW that I have only one year to live" and as I asked that, because I was tripping, that scenario hit me REALLY hard and it felt really, REALLY real (Im under 25 years old btw). My hands started shaking, it felt like my insides made a subtle backflip and had to sit down. I was afraid, I was sad and yeah... just afraid. I already tasted the denial in that scenario: "No, you must be wrong, it cant be, do the tests again" etc. Yeah the soul wont die and it is eternal, but the body is limited and will perish and that is something everyone will have to deal with. Think about it. Just think about what it means. Think about your childhood, of utter ignorant bliss. Think about old age. Think about how you will feel when you know there cant be more than 20, 10, 5 or a few years of your life left. Death is the ultimate perspective check up tool.

@Shin I look forward to the new minimal forum you, have a lovely technology respite I am moving away from wifi/ net soon too.....but I will have to find a way to check in & still see Leo videos, etc... I am happy for you and your clarity (and I will miss you)... wishing you freedom ...and insights ....and adventures in bliss....

Nah,this wasn't logic at work,lol. Apologies. It was a feeble attempt at bad humor. However,many people do turn to spirituality to relieve suffering. The Buddha's primary motivation to seek enlightenment was to end the suffering he and the many others that were also having to endure suffering. To anyone in a suffering state,attaining the bliss and joy that enlightenment promises,is one hell of incentive to consider taking on the endeavor.

@Charlotte Yeah. An example might be, I am aware I get frustrated when someone cuts me off in traffic (keepin it simple here). The falsity is that someone cut you off. They cut some nameless, faceless person in some car off, because they suffer from overinflated self importance. They believe they’re more important than the person they cut off. So, they’re in a hurry, cause their ‘shit to get done’ is more important than others. They’re in a hurry because they have not learned to be present in the now. They have not learned this because their ego is running rampant. They are afraid to self inquire through the false perspective of reality and of self they adopted when something happened in their past. The truth is, no one cut me off. That was just some guy who is looking for love. He believes being important and hurrying will make him feel better. Bliss is inside him, and he doesn’t have a clue. Now, how will you feel the next time this event takes place?

it depends on our definitions of enlightenment, all these gurus and teachers that have praised enlightenment to be a state of bliss and peace will have you believe that 99% of humanity so far have failed their lives, utterly that is their darkness, and that's fine teach what to whom? see failure, be failure enlightenment is both light and dark, the darkness is part of life as much as the light, casting away half of ourselves we come to these silly conclusions we are gods beyond imagination, we can have a miserable life and enjoy the hell out of it,or a life without a single hurdle, this life is but a nanosecond in the breeze of eternal becoming,and yet it is infinitely long "But I dont want to feel negative emotions" what happens now is ok, otherwise it wouldnt happen, you cannot be at ease if you do not accept what happens now I am certainly not in bliss, my negative emotions have gained depths as intensely and vividly as my positive emotions negative emotions start to become an exploration on their own about you being unenlightened or not can you communicate to me how you experience time?how you experience space?how you experience love, failure? as far as I know you could be an enlightened being that enjoys having an ego that struggles to 'enlighten' see the acceptance of darkness is the acceptance of the ego as a playtool how do I know if you're enlightened and you're playing with your ego, or you're not enlightened and you're identified with your ego? there's no telling for me

Let us proceed slowly through your description of your experience and try to explore it more thoroughly: You say: “When you contemplate on your perceptions and sensations, you feel them and understand that concepts just translate what you feel and these concepts are not real.” Like you say, you feel there is a wall between reality and your perceptions of it. It is true that, as you say, thought translates or interprets these sensations and perceptions and forms a new concept out of them. These concepts are considered to be accurate descriptions of the reality of our experience in case of majority of people lives, including you a few days before (the sensation or the perception) but, in fact, they are not, as you have clearly seen now in your own experience. The concept simply abstracts an object such as a body, a person or a world from our experience and, as a natural corollary to this, abstracts a personal subject as the knower of the object. The object known and the subject that supposedly knows it are, in fact, both abstract superimpositions upon the reality of our experience. Neither are ever in fact experienced. The reality is something completely different. Although you are right in saying that these concepts are not real, in the sense that they do not describe the reality of our experience. However, thoughts, like sensations and perceptions have a reality to them. The reality of thought is the same as the reality of sensation and perception, and the reality of you and the reality of everything that is, it is the same infinite Consciousness, ever present, always knowing itself. You feel that you are that which sees through the eyes of this body, hears through the ears of this body. It is true that you are that which sees, hears etc. However, you, Awareness, don’t see or hear through a body. In other words, Awareness is not located in a body, looking out through the eyes, or behind the ears hearing. The idea that we see through the eyes or hear through the ears is simply another mistaken interpretation by thought superimposed upon the reality of our experience. Let us take the experience of hearing. Normally thought conceptualises a ‘me’ inside the head hearing a sound that is considered to be outside the head. Take a sound that you are hearing now, for instance, the traffic. And take the experience of the head, in which hearing is supposedly taking place. Our only experience of the head is a tingling mass of vibration. Now is it your actual experience that the sound of the traffic is taking place inside the tingling vibration we call ‘the head?’ I would say Go directly to the experience. Or rather is it your experience that the tingling vibration called the ‘sound of traffic’ and the tingling vibration call the ‘head’ both appear in Awareness? Or we can ask ourselves, do we experience the Awareness that is hearing the sound of the traffic as being located in the tingling mass of vibration called ‘the head?’ In other words do we experience Awareness inside a sensation but outside a perception? In order to find the answer try to look at this Awareness…..do you know where to look for it, can you see it or find it? No! Whilst Awareness is undeniably present, it cannot be located anywhere. Therefore it is our simple, direct experience that Awareness is not located in the sensation we call the head and therefore it is also our simple experience that hearing, which takes place in Awareness, is also not located in the head. Our only experience of the head is through sensing and our only experience of the sound of the traffic is through hearing, and sensing and hearing both take place in the same place, that is, in the placeless place of Awareness. In fact, it is not even true to say that hearing and sensing take place in Awareness. Rather, Awareness as it were, takes the shape of sensing and hearing from time to time. Awareness then takes the shape of a thought which conjures up a fairy tale about an individual entity that lives inside the head which hears a sound which supposedly takes place in an imagined space outside the head. However, this fairy tale doesn’t change the fact of our experience which is that there is only Awareness, which sometimes takes the shape of thinking, sensing and perceiving, thereby giving birth to the appearance of the mind, body and world. so basically I am what I'm aware of or maybe the awareness itself which includes everything else so all there is, is awareness . am I in the right path here? Is this what's described as being one with everything else ? Whatever it is that is seeing these words and experiencing whatever else is being experienced is what we refer to as Consciousness or Awareness. That is what we intimately know ourselves to be. First of all ask yourself if you can see, feel or touch the Consciousness that you know yourself to be and that is seeing these words? And if the answer is no, then how do you know that it is located inside your body. After all, your body is just a cluster of sensations and perceptions with a concept attached to it. Do you find Consciousness inside this cluster of sensations or perceptions, or inside a concept? Don’t be too quick to answer with a yes or no. Go deeply into your experience. Take each sensation as it appears and see if you can locate Consciousness in it. Now take this sensation that you call ‘me’ the body and compare it with a perception that you call ‘not me,’ for instance the sound of the traffic. Ask yourself whether the sensation is closer to that which knows it, that is, to Consciousness, than the perception. See that both take place equally close to Consciousness, that neither is closer to or further from Consciousness than the other. If you go even more deeply into each of these experiences you will see that the sensation called ‘me,’ ‘my body,’ is made only out of sensing and the sound of ‘the traffic’ is made only out of hearing. And if you go deeply into the experience of sensing and hearing you will find no substance there other than Consciousness. Therefore it will be your own direct, intimate and immediate experience that sensing (the body), which we call ‘me,’ and hearing (the sound of traffic) which we call ‘not me,’ are in fact made out of exactly the same ‘stuff,’ that is, they are made out of Awareness, myself. Explore your experience very deeply in this way, taking time with everything that seems to be both ‘me’ and ‘not me,’ and you will find that there is and has always only ever been one substance in your experience, Consciousness, and that one substance is simultaneously that which knows and that which is known. In other words to know something and to be that thing are the same experience. It is not enough to understand this intellectually. We have to explore our sensations and perceptions as well as our thoughts if we want to FEEL this rather than just KNOW this. It is the patient, detailed exploration of our actual experience that makes this understanding come into life. All negative feelings associated with the separate self such as boredom, anxiety, fear , etc. comprise of a bodily sensation plus a psychological element, i.e a thought in which the separate ‘I’ entity is always present as a belief, either implicitly or explicitly. These two elements, the ‘I’ thought in the mind and the ‘I’ feeling in the body, are the two aspects of ignorance….the belief that I am separate and the feeling that I am separate. Of these two, the feeling that I am separate is by far the larger component. It manifests as uncomfortable feelings and, more subtly, as the apparently innocuous sense of being located here in and/or as a body, sitting in a chair, looking out through the eyes etc. So you have to investigate the beliefs, both at the level of the mind, that we harbour about being a separate individual and also explore the feelings at the level of the body, that seem to confirm and substantiate such beliefs, which is basically what true meditation is all about. Once it is clear both in the realm of our thoughts and in the realm of our feelings, all that remains is to live this experiential understanding from moment to moment. Live as the Consciousness or Awareness that you know yourself to be. Take your stand as that. Think as that, feel as that and act as that. In so far as you feel you choose or decide anything, do so on behalf of this impersonal, unlocated presence of Awareness. As much as possible, before thinking, feeling or doing anything, take your stand first as this Awareness. BE it knowingly and then think, feel and act as that. Live this understanding. And you wouldn’t want anything else in life. Just this understanding. And the bliss and contentment that comes with this. No material desire can even begin to compare with the happiness and love that is in the knowing of - Our Own Being - Our Own Swaroop. It takes time though. And a little effort as well. It's not a matter of time. It doesn't matter how much time it will take. It all depends on your doings - what you have done in the past, how you are doing now and what your nature is. It all depends upon that. How much pure and natural you are from inside, that much faster it will come to you. This is because only your false identity and your false ego are stopping you from understanding your true self. This is so deep in you that even while you are saying that this is false, still you are in the false state. Reality is something very different and people don't know how to handle it. Meditation helps. So does contemplations like these on a forum. With love, Joshua @sarapr @sarapr

Just sounds like ego backlash, which is normal. I would just keep doing what your doing, don't try to find bliss, let that go.

Hello warriors.I am experiencing a higher consciousness reality this time after some lsd trips especially after I saw what exactly god is.After the trip of the god my consciousness became a laser beam really powerful...now it is way less but still it is powerful I can meditate really good my concentration is great.But my first enlightenment experience was different.I was experiencing bliss love fearless freedom wisdom away from everything that causes attachment...now I experience some wisdom and some crazy insights but I am nervous, paranoid fearful and lonely.I think it is because I had heavy insights without being prepared properly.I meditate the same way I was meditating in my first experience trying to find my bliss again.Any suggestions and opinions?

A couple of important notes with regard to the "pdf". The document is extensive, and I've only been practicing the main Kriya, labeled FIRST LESSON:Technique of Kriya Pranayama as it was explained by Sri Mukherjee I have not began practicing the quite extensive "preparatory " techniques he discusses along with it. That is of course aside from the Nadi Shodana, Yoni Mudra Kambhaka, and Maha Mudra that is a natural part of doing Kriya. YMK and Maha Mudra are powerful,so it's best to proceed with caution. My practice (if interested) is: 1. 5-10 minute preliminary asana set. Two Maha Mudra's, as part of the set. 2.Nadi Shodana for 8-12 rounds. 3. Main technique of Kriya (described in PDF). Usually 15-20 minutes or so, or until "profound peace and stillness" or "the peace and the bliss originating from the practice of Kriya" manifests. 4. One YMK, after doing the main Kriya. 5.Awareness japa meditation for 25-40 minutes. The effortless awareness meditation is probably,and just imo, the best stand alone meditation technique I've practiced,outside of doing Kriya. After trying various meditation techniques for years,including mindfulness,breath and "object" based "hard" concentration techniques, It has been, from my experience, the most powerful stand alone meditation technique I've done. Kriya works on the "ecstatic energy/kudalini" as well as producing the stillness. The awareness japa meditation continues to carry one from that stillness, deep into different samahdi states, Kevalya samahdi being where awakening or "self realization" happens. Sahaja samahdi, is the permanent abiding of that self realized natural state. It needs to be said,at least in my experience,that the samahdi states don't necessarily happen only during meditation. I awakened, Kevalya samadhi, when I was wide awake. While grocery shopping no less, lol. I never quite understood the bible verse "the lord will come like a thief in the night" until this,then it was perfectly understood. And from talking to many others who have awakened/self realized, it came upon them suddenly as well. This is of course through doing months or even years of doing spiritual work ,and not the use of psychedelics. I've never tried psychedelics,so I'm not sure how effectively abiding, the awakening shift is on the nervous system.

The wanting a constant state of bliss implies that you dont already have it. You feel you don’t have that now and that the future will offer it to you. Your inviting conflict by accepting the illusion of psychological time. You have invited time to capture that which is timeless. You have invited the illusion to satisfy an illusion which leads to perpetual illusion and conflict. Thought/ego seeks psychological security. So if you are seeking/maintaining this movement to self secure you are inventing insecurity as the result. To seek in any direction brings the other possibility ‘it’s opposite’ into being. Seeking ‘the good’ creates the possibility of ‘the bad’ coming into being. Just like seeking pleasure implies the pain of not maintaining that pleasure or never even getting it. When we seek an illusion we inevitably suffer the consequences. You create the very consequences. Your seeking security and bringing about insecurity as the result.

why shouldnt one want to achieve a constant state of bliss? how does one accept any state whether it be bad or good? if accepting this moment is not wanting this moment to be different, how is accepting this moment even possible, because well always want this moment to be better.

According to advaita vedanta, we are eternal bliss consiousness. My questions are, How does this eternal bliss consiousness create our physcial reality. And, why was there need of evolution? Survival of the fittest, ego protecting itself, basically our engineering that lead to behaivour of harming others. Lastly, why we commit evil? Like rape or murder? As well as What are negative vibrations? Do they lead to destruction?

@Galyna It’s like there was one brownie left on earth, and you were the one lucky enough to get to eat it, and it’s insane how delicious it is. You find it’s a brownie that was perfectly made for you, fudgy level delicious. Unreal. So good, you want to share it with everyone, cause at the root of things, you love em (brownies & people). Just enjoy the brownie! (Insights/path). When loneliness reveals the deeper peace & bliss of being alone, every person you encounter is revealed to be perfectly on their path already. When you go full circle on this, everyone is the brownie! @Galyna That’s a deep truth that can be so liberating. Whoever comes to mind as “that one”, the one who can’t take constructive criticism, they’re your teacher right now. They’re a compass which only points to our own continued liberation. So, what is that closed minded idiot showing you? (Lol) (love & light)

This is all fine and good, but do not confuse emotional mastery or lack of suffering or bliss with enlightenment. They are separate things. This is not to say you shouldn't do "The Work" if it appeals to you. Enlightenment is about realizing what reality is.

LWAM, Season 1, episode 4 Disclaimer: the following story is a result of phenomena called purging on steroids. Symptoms include: shrieking, violent shaking, shifts of energy in the body and the sweet relief that comes after it. This is a full ( it's looong) version of Danielle's story. My first memories of being alive were connected to hatred and violence. My parents fought a lot and their fights weren't one of those minor quarrels that married people have, they fought with the intent to kill one another. I had this vivid image of my brother crying because of them for years playing in my head. I found peace in church of all places. Looking back, I had these weird experiences where I didn't know who I was and something about those moments intrigued me and I kept going there. I went there so often that everyone thought I'd become a nun. I spent most of my days playing on the street or in the mud. All my friends were boys and that effected my self image as a girl later on. My parents would buy me dolls and I'd tear them up beyond recognition. I might have looked like a girl, but inside I was a dude. Then middle school came. I could easily understand all my classmates, but very few understood me. Then that got me questioning: Why don't they get me? Maybe there's something wrong with me. It's like there's constant disconnect between me and most people. I began asking existential questions very early on, wondering about the nature of existence and myself and yet, nobody seemed interested in it.I couldn't understand why things seemed so crazy and everyone considered it to be normal. Why do they keep repeating actions that don't work? Am I really suppose to believe that this is normal? Everything they found meaningful, I found stupid and vice versa. The 'odd one out' narrative resulted in repression – I shouldn't think what I'm thinking, feel what I'm feeling and be so weird. My father was very emotionally abusive and my mother did the opposite – she killed me with love. My sister got married when I was 12 and I saw it as betrayal – she was my protector and i felt like she left me all alone to parent my parents. What was even worse, I saw her get into a shitty dysfunctional marriage like the one our parents had. Throughout all these years I felt like I knew too much, felt too much, was unworthy of love and not good enough to live. The belief in abnormality increased when i got deep into pubrety and realized I was attracted to girls as much as I liked boys. You can imagine how quickly my faith eradicated. From there, further repression and denial, hiding away of who I was from everyone while simultaneously soaking up people's emotions like a sponge and blaming myself for all of it. I was in so much pain all the time – I thought I deserved to suffer. I couldn't relate to my peers - felt too mature. It was like a cruel joke – i was born in the wrong family with reversed roles, in the wrong country whose medieval ideologies I could never buy, with a clearly abnormal personality which no one will ever understand. It always felt like I was backwards. I could have talked to my best friend, but he was so deep into gays are not okay paradigm, I didn't dare to talk to him about it until years later. At this point, I'm 14 and I just find out I'm bisexual, I lost all faith, I feel lonely and misunderstood and the pain is never ending. That was the first time I thought about suicide. It seemed like the most rational thing to do – I don't belong anywhere, I can't trust people and I'm uncapable of living, and the key thing - I can't fix everyone and everything, no matter how hard I try, I can't do anything besides feel their pain. Somehow I got through that year and found people who were like me in high school. Still, there was always this tendency to self destruct - to find a way to prevent what I want from happening. My logic was, I failed at being normal so I might as well try to succeed at being a misfit. I became a hardcore atheist and a social warrior, spending my time getting high, smoking and drinking. 2 edgy 4 u. How do you like that, mom and dad? When that failed, I tried couple of identities for size- the punk one, the nihilist one, the misanthrope one, the commie, the emo, the stoner, the liberal, the clown. Needless to say, none of them worked. And here comes the turn. After I've broken off a toxic relationship and went through that horrific healing period that only teenage heartbreak can bring about, hating people more than ever, I got tired of feeling so hopeless and I got into Buddhist philosophy. Still, reading about peace and compassion for mankind felt a bit dry until I stumbled upon the big E word, the promise land – to die without dropping the body – the thing I wanted to do for years. The quest began, or so I thought. My grandfather died and for the first time ever, I realized the significance of this work, it wasn't about being blissed out , it was about death. All those years of on and off depression was only a preparation for this death. Meditation brought back that peace I felt at church and I began to open up again. My personaliy is pretty much all or nothing, so when I heard about E, I got obsessed. I tried to create a new identity out of it so I can have all the peace and love without having to face my shit, but couldn't do it. It was too late - ups, the Pandora's box has been opened. For every release, dark night followed, up and down, from bliss to depression, from confusion to clearity. until I hit that breaking point. That breaking point build up over the years. And just when I thought that the pain couldn't get more unbearable, it got even worse and worse. I woke up one day, rather recently, realizing I'm going to die as a 19 year old and all of the things I i thought were true held no reality whatsoever. All I ever did was renew my story every step of the way, new layer of delusion, new ways to resist and to suffer. And that trauma and extreme suffering I endured for years was a perfect way to get me to surrender. To say: you know what? I can't do this anymore. I give up. I surrender. If I need to go through a this pain for another 10 lifetimes, I'll do it. I won't try to escape. From then on, it's like someone took off this enourmous baggage of my shoulders and dissolved the suffering. My body has been going crazy these last few weeks and that's when this trauma came to the surface. I was in a way protecting myself from those memories and feelings that were deeply burried for years and now they are free to come because I have no resistance. Most importantly, it's not only on a mind level, but on a body level. My family came to visit me the other day and the the first thing I noticed was the lack of tension in my body- it's amazing how I used to tremble when my father would touch me and now I feel open and welcoming. There's no need to protect anything anymore. Just a couple of months ago I wouldn't have even allowed myself to think about these things and now I fully accept them. If you're still reading this, good for you! Sorry I didn't make a dramatic coming out video like everyone else, guess i'm simply old- fashioned. End credits: And when darkness comes let it inside you. Directed by Bigger, Longer & Uncut.

It's a huge, vast difference. Study Ramana's life and you'll begin to see the depth of the enlightenment journey, maybe. Ultimately you'll have to experience it for yourself. Just a glimpse of the Absolute totally shatters everything you knew and throws all prior experiences out the window. Many states of nonduality can be similar in description, for instances, there are many void states which seem absolute, but people stagnate and fail to go deeper. They still have karma and aren't really free from bondage--they retain their vasanas, don't see the whole of reality, and never know Sat Chit Ananda. When Ramana talks about the Bliss of the Self, it's not some fancy, roundabout way of saying you become happy when you're enlightened. He's describing the nature of reality.