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Hello, everyone. Congratulations for creating this kind of rare greenhouse for metaphysics, which I found after stumbling across Leo Gura´s videos in the net several months ago. I honestly consider them some of the best descriptions of the mystical experience ever. As this is my first post, I´ll say that I am from Spain, and although I´m older than most here (46 years old) , I suppose I share the basics with all of you: natural tendency to introspection, early age insights with no proper context, obsessive search, and finally getting that context through life-changing readings (Nisargadatta mainly, but also most of Vedanta, Kashmir Shaivism, Christian Mysticism, Dzogchen, etc.) that seemed to explain previous awakenings and paved the way for future ones. OK. Although I obviously would like to have a response from Leo, since he´s the most experienced person here and somehow the pioneer, I would greatly appreciate any opinion/help regarding something that has been around my mind for some time, after reading some experiences that I would not say "contradict", but at least are not totally consistent with mine. Which, mind you, is solid, with some total certainties, but not spectacular, since I never resorted to psychedelics. Let´s go: My experience is simple (and astonishing at the same time): there is something like a translucent, absolutely impersonal bubble "in front of me", which does not belong to any "body", or particular time or space, within which everything (the Universe, my body included, and my inner world of thought) appears, with the exception of the Awareness inside which the bubble itself arises. And, paradoxically, I am that Unmanifest Witness or Aware Space... I already don´t feel like I am human. I see a human body and a human thoughts playing a game within me. And about the Bubble I should add that, as an unlimited canvas, any being or image can be created there. The dough is the same. John Wren Lewis, after his exceptional NDE put it best: "Absolute Consciouness focuses down into this body-mind perspective, playing something like a game called John Wren Lewesing, and it is the Absolute that watches, not John" Everything about my spiritual awakenings relate to the fact that we already are the Aware Space to which any experience appear. No spiritual practice could make me become more "Aware Space" than what I actually feel that I am. Spiritual practice can, however, radically affect the subtlety of what I perceive, affect the contents of the particular perspective that the Absolute (Aware Space) is conscious of while this incarnation exists. So my question is based on the fact that this is as far as meditation and introspection have taken me. I am very well aware that the psychedelics are a much more powerful path, and I also know that there are insights that are veiled to me for my resistence to use them. And I am surprised when I read experiences about the Godhead as being something "out there". In some of them you depict the Absolute Godhead as something with an outer flavour, like a distant light to reach or an external Mind to decrypt. In my (limited) experience, however, the Godhead is precisely that which perceives, The Aware Space where common daylife or colourful insights happen. The Watcher/Subject of "my" particular perspective and my true nature. ce. I know one of the usual posters in this forum agrees ( I asked him in another platform), but I feel like this is the last obstacle I have to sort out, and I want to be sure and have the roots in the right place, so I´d greatly appreciate opinions on this paradox and a psychedelic perspective that I lack. Thanks in advance:)

Phew, this is a vast and deceitful topic - I think some distinctions are called for. Selfishness, to me, implies being or doing with own gains in mind, usually on behalf/cost of others. True selflessness, to me, implies doing good deeds without any motif, without agenda, without underlying selfish needs. For true selflessness to exist, you would probably have to have gone through complete dis-identification with ego, to such a degree that you don't even care if you live. That leaves the uncomfortable realization that when we think we do selfless acts, they are actually selfish and there is something in us that we are gaining by doing that "selfless" act. Meeting that need in us, if only for a temporary moment, is what gives the deep pleasure, and that's what makes us come back for more. Yes, ouch, this is a painful realization, but it's not a bad or harmful realization, on the contrary, it's seeing a bit more clearly. My interpretation of this is that you don't want to be more selfish, and instead you want to become more responsible, responsible towards self. By becoming responsible, you will need to face that which has broken down, or prevented self-esteem and self-worth to emerge, and rebuild these traits as they are the foundational building block of our experience of being. In this process you will have to face some shadows of the past, and also aspects of the current that you are avoiding or not able to see. Pursuing a spiritual journey without facing one's shadows is spiritual bypassing, using spirituality as a solution to avoid having to deal with the psychological issues that we've accumulated throughout our lives. We need to own back these disowned aspects. This means that we need to stop and see what it is that is weighing us down. We need to become aware of our dogma and our self-created defense and control mechanisms which sole purpose has been to build a tough shell, or wall, around those sensitivities in our lives, so that we don't have to, or have to fully experience the related pain and suffering. One of the most common problems, or distractions with personal development is that we turn outwards and try to solve external problems. We identify problems with our work, with our families, with our partners and with all and everything that is around us that rub us the wrong way. What we need to do is to shift focus from that external world and shift focus towards ourselves and start figuring out where we have gotten ourselves stuck and how we need to get ourselves unstuck. This could be interpreted as what you say "becoming selfish", but I want to call call this "becoming responsible" for self and the world that we create for ourselves. This is where we are have the power and freedom to create whatever changes, within ourselves, that contributes towards creating the kind of world that we want. This doesn't mean that we can change what is, since that which is, just is. But it allows us to make more complex sense of what is happening around us, and shift our own perspective in such ways that we relieve the excessive suffering that we call upon ourselves, by not being able to flow with what is. For example, bad parents become nothing more than themselves products of circumstances, cultures, their own parents. What they do, or have done, isn't coming from being evil, or wanting to do evil. They simple wasn't capable of doing otherwise, based on their own shadows and suffering. Becoming able to shift towards a more complex, more holistic perspective is inevitably followed with emotional detachment, as a long-going process. Gaining more complex and impersonal perspectives also makes it easy to forgive others and ourselves, building a strong foundation for cultivating self-compassion. Sometimes you have to slow down, really slow down, to be able to speed up. That slowing down is the inward turning phase needed to accelerate growth. This is somewhat like driving your car with the handbreak halfway engaged, it slows you down, it causes friction, it gets heated, and it will break you down from time to time. Slow down, figure our how to disengage your build-in breaks, and someday probably sooner than later, you will be able to go fast without that friction. @Preety_India I guess this boils down to one question - are you willing and able to slow down, let go of outwards distraction, and turn inwards to relieve yourself from your inner demons/shadows? This is the single most difficult obstacle to overcome on the developmental journey.

Different music has different effects on me. This track always makes the hairs stand up on the back of my neck. There's always strange mix of emotions. It's hard to describe why it resonates so much with me. Maybe a deep part of my Shadow is that I don't feel at home. I'm constantly restless, feeling lost and disconnected. I'm in need of a place to call home; wherever I look it's not there. What does home even feel like? I'm forever waging war against the injustice of feeling like I abandoned myself long ago. Everything is impersonal and un-familiar. I'm propelled forward only by the changing of the days and the whims of sea of change around me. If not for that I would cease to be as I'm unable to find true North and impel myself that way. There is no ground or earth to root to and claim as mine - nothing that will guide me when I'm unsure, comfort me when I'm uneasy, or return to after a long time away.

What has to be understood is that male sexuality is both personal and impersonal in the same way that female sexuality is both personal and impersonal. It is the same thing as any animal. Let’s take a cat for example. All cats will be fundamentally similar to one another. But if you’ve ever had a cat as a pet, you will know that their personalities are unique. So, male sexuality (as a general instinct) is two-fold. On one hand, you have the more reptilian brain stuff. This includes the desire for dominance and variety. It is most interested in seeking sex with as many fertile women as possible. And this makes a man most attuned to young women who he can claim as his own and impregnate to spread his genetic material as widely as possible. This part competes with other men hierarchically to impregnate as many women as possible. And to this part of him women are 100% interchangeable. On the other hand, you have the prefrontal cortex stuff. This is the part of the man that is pro-social that is interested in building community around himself. This is the part of him that is interested in love and friendship with a woman. And it is interesting in caring for and supporting his partner and family. This drive isn’t as spicy as the other drive but it is deeper and more gratifying... as long as his other drive is not being squelched. But of course, every man is unique. Some men are naturally geared towards one more than the other. And some men are repressed relative to one or the other. But every man has a lion and a lion tamer in him. No two lions are exactly the same. No two lion tamers are exactly the same. But all lions share similarities with other lions. And all lion tamers have a similar function to other lion tamers.

Contemplate on how you've always been constructing & projecting *self-referential meanings* while deriving your sense of self from being the ego. Now think about the most triggering, judgemental & hurtful self-referential thought you ever had as a child. It really hurt, right? Why does that thought not hurt you anymore while recalling it now that you are an adult? Well, it's because you are not identified with being that child anymore. It's like, now that you're no longer identified with the 'child ego-mind', thinking that thought feels as 'impersonal' as hearing about other's opinions & judgements they have about themselves. Your ego-mind morphed into another version of itself now. In the initial stages of awakenings, one of the facets of the process is You basically realizing that you are That which is aware of the ego, you realize the personhood have been dreamed up by You all along. As you awaken deeper and deeper, there will come a point when there will be no difference between admiring your 'human face' in the mirror & watching the sunset. No difference between what you call 'other people's eyes' & 'your eyes'. Up & down. And so on. And I mean recognizing the substance of all form & ideas. Pure divinity. Just ISness Clear Direct As the *ego dissolution* starts getting 'deeper' and 'deeper', Awareness/You recognizes that you've never been an individual/human self/ego-mind. It's pure imagination. You see Yourself in everything & everyone. You stop getting things personally. You become Love.

Just continue to share you views, and simply observe. More people will be sharing their stories as time unfolds. Like his God realization video, and he Exercise for realizing you are God video... Either it's really just ME. JUST THIS BUBBLE EXPERIENCE PRETENDING YOU BE ON A FORUM. Or, he is dangerously talking people into solipsism where it is like, just you and Leo because you 'Created Leo'... No. Sure, as God the universal me created and allowed all things. But, not you or me. We are part of this impersonal process. But, if it was just YOU, or just ME... Why would I create this forum? Where there is seemingly other people interacting. I mean, think supply chains, populations, politics, survival etc... All of this is because there are many beings here on this planet. I think there are many times when he has not made it clear this difference between maybe what is ABSOLUTE, and what is Relatively TRUE. But, for the sake of your life what is relatively true it far more important to your well being. People have no fucking idea what is true already... People are so uneducated, self deceived, ego centric, immature. Look at both myself in some context and people like Connor Murphy. I am sure for every 1 famous Connor Murphy there have been 1000's of other fools no one knows about because they have no platforms for us to know. Hey, maybe going insane is part of your process. But, if it can be avoided we all as a community need to ask more powerful questions and take more collective responsibility (as Leo loves to pout... but his embodiment is not complete in any regard). I personally think the world needs an Actualized.org. So, I am here to support Leo as well as anyone. We need to seriously look out for each other. I am here for you guys as long as I am welcome in this space. We are all fail-able. This is serious shit.

You have more work to do. There is nobody to claim consciousness. Consciousness is sovereign, and you are speaking as a human being. "You" as javfly did not make a single thing. If you think your mind is real and everyone else is a figment of your mind, you're delusional, not awakened. Consciousness is impersonal—it created you as well as everything else. One wave does not make the entire ocean around it.

death is the boundary between personal consciousness and impersonal consciousness; death ends the dream and releases consciousness back to the absolute... true or false when the absolute manifested and objectified into the universe, it split consciousness in two, a subject and a object ... this was the only way for god to love itself the subject consciousness depends on and is housed by this body but will quit projecting this universe once the subject perishes

@spinderella "MY consciousness" is not a thing. Consciousness is impersonal. It is the thing from which personhood (and everything else) arises. However, "MY awareness" is more accurate (but still untrue). Awareness is a perspective that occurs within consciousness. Awareness is the ability to focus and differentiate "things" out of consciousness. "Your" body is a form of awareness, as it allows for seeing, hearing, breathing, etc. In a sense, it is a contraction of consciousness that you experience as a perspective. I am putting pronouns in quotation marks, as awareness is actually the reason for the illusion of separateness. Because you are aware, reality appears as if you were the center of it. Therefore, it is the precondition of the appearance of the separate self ("mine", "yours", etc). Awareness is not "yours", because awareness precedes "you".

@flume I actually did not know that Leo made such a video until this thread, and even then I haven't watched it. Apparently, my reasoning for cheating is quite different from the video. I agree with you here. In my view, it doesn't matter how good the sex is or how beautiful, great, smart, and funny the woman is. When a man cheats on his woman, it's almost always about him, not about her. Male sexuality is very impersonal. Even if she's the world's most beautiful woman and the world's greatest mother and all the great things in the world, at some point his attraction towards her will decrease and then he will start seeking other women even if they're "less" than her. And "less" here is his own rational judgement. So, he actually knows and understands and even appreciates all the good things that she is, but he will still seek another sexual partner, regardless. So, yes, you shouldn't seek to keep your man loyal. Good sex for men is not the same thing as good sex for women. Good sex for men is mostly physical and perceptive (has to do with the senses, sights, sounds, etc...). Emotional connection is not a prerequisite for good sex for men, even though it's definitely appreciated. You needn't get triggered here, it's just practical advice. However, bad sex is very different from no sex at all. No sex at all is his responsibility, while bad sex is her responsibility. Easy for you to say these things when you don't have the same urges. And they are indeed powerful urges. No kidding. It's not necessarily "bad" or a "problem", but I see your point. And "cheating" doesn't necessarily break that commitment. Of course, that assumes there aren't already huge problems existing within the relationship, like lack of trust and communication. If there are already huge problems, then cheating is not really the actual problem, but really a scapegoat for and a doubling-down on the lack of communication. Either way, I would inquire into why people take it so seriously and consider it very threatening to the relationship. Agreed.

Projecting happens in every stage, more so in Orange, Blue and below. What is so specific for Green? What Green topics are impersonal?

? Or: You’re always letting go... However in either case there isn’t actually someone doing it. It’s the letting-go that nobody can do. It’s a totally impersonal play.

I believe that the impersonal, attributeless, formless witness Consciousness "moves around inside different forms."

Method I did a 1h 30min session of kriya supreme fire once on every chakra, and then I alternated between the 2nd, 4th, 6th and 7th. After every breath hold of kriya supreme fire, as I was waiting to recover my breath, I did a chakra opening exercise on the same chakra. Kriya Supreme Fire The general Idea for this exercise is to focus on a chakra while holding breath and doing the 3 main bandhas. The area of focus for the 2nd chakra is over the hip bone on the stomach, the heart space for 4th chakra, third eye for the 6th chakra and top of head for the 7th. This fills the chakra with energy. For instructions read Kundalini Exposed by SantataGamana. The energetic increase from this exercise can saturate dysfunctions of your chakras and manifest in various ways, it could be dangerous, especially for people new to energy work. Do at your own risk. I'm not trying to avoid spelling out the technique here it just takes too much explaining to go into in a forum post, better read it directly from the source. Chakra Opening On every out-breath you gently relax the chakra, fill it with bliss and tap into its positive expression. This synergizes with kriya supreme fire as it gives more energy to work with. The positive expression of the 2nd chakra is pleasure, 4th is love, 6th is presence, 7th is energetically melting together with the kosmos. There are many ways to do this. Here is an example for the 2nd chakra. I recommend Enlightenment through the Path of Kundalini by Tara Springett for more general instructions and Wheels of Life to better understand the chakra system. It was very energetically intense. When I had finished and opened my eyes I saw the word in a way I never had before. It was a way of perceiving, cognizing, behaving and experiencing myself, a totally new way of being that I realized was turquoise. The Anatomy of Turquoise The 2nd, 4th, 6th and 7th chakra make up the inner workings of turquoise. Everything I witnessed fell into an open heart(4th chakra). My open 6th chakra made the love indiscriminate, totally compassionate for even the darkest side of a being. That ability to see someone in their totality, without judging its ugly sides, is what gives turquoise it's famed holism. A 2nd chakra bond was then formed with being entered my awareness, could be a part of my subtle body, psyche or could be another living being. The indiscriminate love then worked through that bond to create the desire to heal the being. Healing means making happy, as happiness is the psyche's way of signaling health. It's then perceived that the being has bonds with other beings that in turn has more bonds. These bonds continue out to a whole network encompassing every being on this planet, aka, the web of life. The open 7th chakra made this cognition cosmic rather than personal, giving a 3rd person perspective required for the impersonal nature of the 2nd tier. Conclusions That state of mind requires a high degree of energy and purity. If I were to sustain that level, I would have to purify lower traumas and impurities that are keeping my energy down. Cleaning up is so important for vertical growth. I had never experienced yellow even close to this strongly before. It almost seemed like I had skipped that stage in many aspects. Just like rationality is the way of knowing for orange, intuition and empathy was a way of knowing for turquoise. Yellow systems thinking gave context for that intuition to give structure to the web of life. Turquoise is in essence a holistic healer. Leo has portrayed turquoise as spiritual in essence, which I now think is wrong. The ego transcendence achieved by spirituality is one aspect of turquoise, but turquoise is not complete without the involvement of the 2nd chakra in the way I described. I have ~2 years of energy work under my belt. I was meditating quite a lot around the time I had the experience. Normally I'm pretty orange but with a yellow worldview. But I also have a high amount of trauma and undeveloped sides of my psyche, so if my spiral development could skyrocket like that, then anyone could do it.

Ironically I had no plans of continuing this journal. I started a new journal and it got deleted with the data loss. Lately I've been so busy and so energetic that I haven't been writing that much. The daylight hours are so long it's hard to sleep and there's so much to DO. It felt great until a couple days ago when I started to feel like I'd been on vacation too long and was starting to get homesick. Funny that our vacations are mostly full of activity. I listened to the beginning of an Eckhart Tolle video that autoplayed while I was working and someone asked how they could reconcile what he teaches with Abraham Hicks (without naming her). He said that there's the inward and outward movements, the creating and dying back. As an explanation within duality, I equate this with seasons, I generally feel great about the busy, energetic seasons and then loathe the winter, yet understand one depends on the other. This turned into such a huge pattern of suffering over the years, that seems so silly and impersonal. Before the shift I had I almost got stuck in idolizing the spiritual winter stage, then discovering the law of attraction resulted in huge experiential understandings which in turn after the fact may have flipped the balance. The belief that happiness comes from conditions, that happiness comes from events, circumstances and things and is something that someone can have and something someone can lose or secure is so sneaky. You actually create best when you aren't expecting anything from it, this is the essence of creation. I guess that's why I like journaling. I like the amount of focus that trying to explain something in a way that someone else might understand helps me find me on a certain subject. When I'm journaling on my own, it's often lazy and lacks flow and intention. Yet, I also don't really expect anyone to read it or get anything from it, it's for me. So it tricks me into finding a good balance. I got stuck in this really self centered perspective that I was the chosen one. Years ago I adored and kept contemplating this line from the Sia song, "I'm still fighting for peace." And I want it, I want my life so bad I'm doing everything I can Then another one bites the dust It's hard to lose a chosen one You did not break me I'm still fighting for peace Funny when you put the song lyrics together with this video I made. "It's hard to lose a chosen one." How strong this narrative has been of the chosen one. Jesus Christ. Harry Potter. The hero's journey. Essentially you are your own chosen one. You are your perspective. And so much more, you are all the possibilities and the choosing. In the narrative anyone who chooses himself is a narcissistic asshole. "I volunteer as tribute." Because if I don't I loose lose someone I love, someone weaker than I. Jesus Christ. I must do this only as a sacrifice, to save others. I make myself infamous, I make myself eternal in the story, eternally heroic and loved by sacrificing myself for others. 12 This is My commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. You're telling me now, that this as an ideal is suffering? This is all bullshit? Jesus, is co-dependence love? Hello? Hello? C-can you hear me? I can be your China doll, if you like to see me fall Boy, you're so dope, your love is deadly Tell me life is beautiful They think that I have it all I've nothing without you All my dreams and all the lights mean Nothing without you All my dreams and all the lights mean Nothing, if I can't have you

Detachment feels like a forced action. It's a word that implies there is a separate individual which can attach or detach from something. Awakening is recognizing the individual that seems to attach to certain things or outcomes never actually existed. Apparent happenings become impersonal sort of speak.

Doesn’t being identified usually precede desiring? Also, is all suffering the same? I’ve copied and pasted the following several times in the forum. No one has ever really commented on it one way or another. Four types of suffering For whatever it’s worth,,, Intentional suffering is sometimes referred to as Conscious suffering in the Fourth Way. In Talks on Beelzebub's Tales, Bennett distinguishes four types of suffering - Unnecessary Suffering, Unavoidable Suffering, Voluntary Suffering and Intentional Suffering. Lets have a look at each of these to see if they can help our understanding: The first is Unnecessary Suffering. This would be the type of suffering that we incur because of our unreasonable attitudes and expectations towards others, from our ill-will, hatred and rejection of others, from doubt, possessiveness, arrogance and self pity. In other words, suffering arising from our self-importance. The second is Unavoidable Suffering. This would be the type of suffering that comes to us by accident or from events beyond our control, such as interpersonal conflicts, war, disaster, disease or death. Third, we have Voluntary Suffering. This would be the type of suffering that we take upon ourselves in order to accomplish a personal aim, such as an athlete who disciplines himself to win a race, or a student who labours to get good grades. And finally we have Intentional Suffering. According to Bennett, this would be the kind of suffering that we take upon ourselves in order to accomplish an impersonal or altruistic goal, one that is directed more towards service to others or to the Work, and not for any personal gain. Bennett assumes that this is what Gurdjieff meant by Intentional Suffering. From an article on the second Conscious Shock https://www.endlesssearch.co.uk/philo_is_talk_ae2005.htm

The desire for a new future order of things, substantially different from the present, is religious conviction at its core - the awaiting for the eventual coming of the Kingdom of God - in the external outside world rather than the internal personal sphere. Anti-capitalist sentiment, void of a precise and substantiated scientific analysis backed by empirical fact, becomes a religion in itself, a religion of opposition against an imagined external Other cause of evil and suffering seeking to rationalize and explain inner suffering within and caused by the self. It serves, paradoxically, as the opium for explaining to oneself the causes of his or her one's pervasive feeling of alienation from thy self, thy labor, and other's by numbing the actual inner and experiential alienation with a hyper-abstract extrapolation that sees the cause in an imagined imposed order of capitalism, in its perceived and imagined historical, societal and current economic form, while not being aware that it's a system you wilfully participate in everyday life via participation in capitalist exchange - as the author, Mark Fisher poignantly points out: ''accepting our insertion at the level of desire in the remorseless meat-grinder of Capital. What is being disavowed in the abjection of evil and ignorance onto fantasmatic Others is our own complicity in the planetary networks of oppression. What needs to be kept in mind is both that capitalism is a hyper-abstract impersonal structure and that it would be nothing without our cooperation.'' ''The most Gothic description of Capital is also the most accurate. Capital is an abstract parasite, an insatiable vampire and zombie-maker; but the living flesh it converts into dead labor is ours, and the zombies it makes are us." Capitalist realism, as the author Mark Fisher notes, in his book of the same title, is very far from precluding a certain anti-capitalism. As Zizek has provocatively pointed out, anti-capitalism is widely disseminated in capitalism. Far from undermining capitalist realism, this gestural anti-capitalism actually reinforces it. What we have here is a vision of control and communication much as Jean Baudrillard understood it, in which subjugation no longer takes the form of subordination to an extrinsic spectacle, but rather invites us to interact and participate. But this kind of irony feeds rather than challenges capitalist realism. A film like Wall-E exemplifies what Robert Pfaller has called "interpassivity": the film performs our anti-capitalism for us, allowing us to continue to consume with impunity. "The role of capitalist ideology is not to make an explicit case for something in the way that propaganda does, but to conceal the fact that the operations of capital do not depend on any sort of subjectively assumed belief." "Capitalist ideology", in general, Zizek maintains, "consists precisely in the overvaluing of belief - in the sense of the inner subjective attitude - at the expense of the beliefs we exhibit and externalize in our behavior. So long as we believe (in our hearts) that capitalism is bad, we are free to continue to participate in capitalist exchange." According to Zizek, "capitalism, in general, relies on this structure of disavowal." "We believe money is only a meaningless token of no intrinsic worth, yet we act as if it has a holy value. Moreover, this behavior precisely depends upon the prior disavowal - we are able to fetishize money in our actions only because we have already taken an ironic distance towards money in our heads. Corporate anti-capitalism wouldn't matter if it could be differentiated from an authentic anti-capitalist movement. The so-called anti-capitalist movement seemed also to have conceded too much to capitalist realism Since it was unable to posit a coherent alternative political-economic model to capitalism, the suspicion was that the actual aim was not to replace capitalism but to mitigate its worst excesses; and, since the form of its activities tended to be the staging of protests rather than a political organization, there's a sense that the anti-capitalism movement consisted of making a series of hysterical demands which it didn't expect to be met. Protests have formed a kind of carnivalesque background noise to capitalist realism."

the idea of death is a great meditation tool. nothing is more contrary to the ego than death. everything you say about fear of getting old, wasting your life, etc., is pure ego. There is nothing like a good or bad life, only the present moment, free of judgment. if you stick in the present and free the mind of thoughts, the fear of death disappears, because it is seen that the impersonal amplitude that you are cannot die. it is the same for any being, and if your body disappears, there are still countless other bodies existing. But of course, forget about your ego, there will be nothing left of it. that's why you have to die before you die. generously surrender the i. Or not so generously, i surrender it to gain the permanence and the beauty, maybe that's why each time i do i have a big ego reaction. The no ego is full of beauty , but empty of content. The ego hates that emptiness

Exactly. If you look at yourself from the point of view of death, you will see that your "I", your sense of yourself, never existed. it was a mirage. but being, existence, cannot not be. what happens is that it is impersonal, empty.

Four types of suffering For whatever it’s worth,,, I copied this from the thread on George Gurdjieff. A legitimate swatter of hornets nests,,,, Intentional suffering is sometimes referred to as Conscious suffering in the Fourth Way. In Talks on Beelzebub's Tales, Bennett distinguishes four types of suffering - Unnecessary Suffering, Unavoidable Suffering, Voluntary Suffering and Intentional Suffering. Lets have a look at each of these to see if they can help our understanding: The first is Unnecessary Suffering. This would be the type of suffering that we incur because of our unreasonable attitudes and expectations towards others, from our ill-will, hatred and rejection of others, from doubt, possessiveness, arrogance and self pity. In other words, suffering arising from our self-importance. The second is Unavoidable Suffering. This would be the type of suffering that comes to us by accident or from events beyond our control, such as interpersonal conflicts, war, disaster, disease or death. Third, we have Voluntary Suffering. This would be the type of suffering that we take upon ourselves in order to accomplish a personal aim, such as an athlete who disciplines himself to win a race, or a student who labours to get good grades. And finally we have Intentional Suffering. According to Bennett, this would be the kind of suffering that we take upon ourselves in order to accomplish an impersonal or altruistic goal, one that is directed more towards service to others or to the Work, and not for any personal gain. Bennett assumes that this is what Gurdjieff meant by Intentional Suffering. From an article on the second Conscious Shock https://www.endlesssearch.co.uk/philo_is_talk_ae2005.htm

but to what extent can you be enlightened? I guess quite deeply. I see reality as about to dissolve, a screen of color, like a set behind what is emptiness. I talk to people and I see their emptiness, they are just forms ... like me! but what is behind, that void, seems unknowable . it is nothing, it is completely impersonal, not human, but somehow it has to be intelligent, it is enough to observe the apparent reality to deduce the intelligence of the absolute. But how can the absolute be intelligent if it is nothing? because obviously, it is not "something". We are the absolute right now, and it's impersonal. Is impossible to understand that there is void, nothing, like an abyss. Think about that is insane, maybe that's why the mistics always says that it's uncognwable. Except Leo, of course

Think about it this way... You are not *perceiving* other people, so what is happening is that you're having a conscious direct experience of infinity manifesting itself in different ways. Where is 'your' Consciousness located? Where is the present moment occuring? The present moment is in fact impersonal consciousness/God experiencing whatever you're conscious of in the 'Now', because 'in the now' you are conscious, so everything is happening in your awareness, since you're Consciousness itself. ❤ So when you say "imagining infinite dreams symultaneously', "experiencing them separately" etc, you assume the present moment is separate from consciousness. Which is not the case. The present moment is You being conscious. Time is imaginary.

Impersonal Consciousness cannot feel alone. The ego-mind does.

Im here to help! You can unlock levels of imagination that are unimaginable! Kind of like your dreams, you have way more imagination when you are impersonal. Don't try to imagine things, but rather see what your imagination has in store, you just be the observer of it. If you can see black only, thats a great start. You have the canvas. Now you can imagine a white dot on it? Try enlarging the dot. Imagine it in another colour. Imagine the black only as another colour too. Zoom in, zoom out, play around that plane of imagination. Start small. In my opinion if you start imagining dots, lines, circles, triangles, basic shapes, then your mind will get the building blocks to imagine more complex things further. Or get more tuned with the imaginative part of yourself. You can try a visualisation technique I like which is to go to the edge of your experience now and "see" what is beyond there. You might get an impression of seeing something from your imagination. Even if not, just do not identify with what you saw and centre as the empty (or otherwise very small) being that is able to see that space of imagination beyond the edge of your visual perception. Then keep watching for what that empty being sees, and keep grounding as that being - which is not hard as it is the one who sees. Tell me if you get any visualisations from this. Its basically self inquiry using the imaginary plane.