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What is enlightenment? Enlightenment is the realization that you are not an entity within reality, but rather reality itself. How to be enlightened? You are already enlightened, however you have chosen to pretend not to be. Ignorance (as opposed to enlightenment) is mostly a distraction. It is fueled by the strength of your worldly attachments for the most part. Regardless, the only thing you have to do to be enlightened is to simply *be* enlightened. How has one chosen to be ignorant? Ignorance is mostly taught by society. Since birth, a particular region in reality (the body you are currently inhabiting) is singled out and said to be you (John for example, or Sarah, or whatnot). How can one shed this ignorance? By realizing that you are not this specific region within reality, but reality itself. To use an analogy, you are not the figure depicted in a photograph. You are the photograph itself. What is the nature of reality? It cannot be put to words. Were it so, it would be limited. Words divide. Reality is integrated and whole. However, all these Isms we are attaching to reality can never capture the truth. Regardless, sages have tried to do so. Reality is therefore described with words such as: Infinity Omnipotence Omniscience Existence Intelligence Consciousness Bliss Pure limitless potential God Etc. What is the Self? The self is just another word used to describe reality. However it is a good one at that, because it carries the connotation that reality is in fact, you. What is the world? The world, or Maya, is a holographic projection off of reality, created by the individual’s mind. Simply put, the mind interprets raw reality (pure potential) to look a certain way, and that appears to the Self as the world. What is the ego? The ego is a collection of emotionally charged thoughts and memories, often mistaken as the true self. The ego has a fascination with imitating reality and that often causes quite a bit of confusion. What is “I”? The “I” is a like a flagpole around which the ego assembles. It is the first division of reality. “I versus the rest.” You can trace back reality in this direction: Ego -> I -> The Self What is God? God only exists in relation to the lowly ego who has found itself alone and powerless in the world. Both God and Ego are the Self, pretending to be something else other than itself. If "I" attain "enlightenment" will I become like superman? No. But..? You do not "attain" enlightenment. You already are enlightened. F$%K you Misagh! Who are you to tell me all these things you ignorant, egoic, etc. etc. *gently flips the table and floats away.

There’s nothing else than bliss. Suffering belongs to the fals (ego) ??

I started doing it to obtain peace of mind, i dealt my whole life with depression, on and off, and the first time i tried meditation it was like magic, it was total and absolute bliss. It shifted my whole life towards meditation and self actualization, i grew in 3 months more than i could ever dream off. But as you can imagine from this post it all fell apart. My intuition told me that it was time for a shift, i had to abandon the current family situation im living in, and commit to leading someone trough life, the way i myselve believe to be the right way. My father is a narcissist and im pretty sure a sociopath, but he has got money and gets away with every manipulation, emotional abuse and fucking slavery hes making us do. So the thing i gotta do is move away from my family, and take my mother with me, to save her from this hell, cause she wants to leave too. I get realy close, i manage to bring myselve back up, but every time its time to leave i fail, not the leaving part but the taking my mother with me part. I know i gotta do it but something is holding me back, if its confort, or fear of sheading my old selve, or both.

Hey, so, while searching and browsing a bit through the forum I did not find a post related to a zen retreat. Before writing this post I was not sure if it would be beneficial or interesting for other people to view this. Yet, I tend to write (post) mostly because I enjoy writing and feedback, also it is a healthy way for me to express myself. So, this is going to be story based since I can recollect most of the things what I wanted to express in an arbitiary manner. So , a word of caution for being unsystematic / not orderly. This year I did my first real retreat in flesh and blood for two weeks at a soto zen tempel in France. I did a couple of online retreats now with the home pratice programm from Shinzen Young and was quite excited to see a zen master for the first time in real life. To compare their teachings and see their similarities since I am now following Shinzens "teaching" now actively for 1 year instead of testing technique over technique, which I still do to a degree. When I arrived at the monastery I was like so often to late. Thus, missing the introduction and the welcome dinner (literally it was in the evening..). Consequentially, I did not do much that day and went to bed walking around the tempel a bit and unpacking my luggage, taking care of small necessities, things I forgot and making sure I have them. The following day we had Zazen so I will describe the life at the zen tempel first, for the total of the two weeks to present an overview: First week: 2 times zazen 1,30h each session including walking meditation (kinhin) for 20 min. Second week for approx 3 days. : 3 times zazen same procedure Second week the last approx. 4 days: 4 times zazen same procedure Each day was structured as follows: -> Waking up at 6 am -> Zazen following chanting of some prayers -> breakfast in silence + small break (Genmai japanese rice soup, each morning which was tasty) -> Samu (community work / joint work in case that makes more sense) -> Lunch -> Samu -> Dinner -> Lunch -> bed rest / bed time In total the retreat was not that meditation intensive, yet you are supposed to pratice while doing samu which a few people tried, yet there was still an air of meditativeness around since the monks there worked too and had to check if people do their work correctly. What suprised me the most was that the whole monastary was autonomous, they planted their own food, vegetables and herbs. So, the work around the monastery included mostly working outside in the area of the monastary. Cleaning, gatherhing herbs, or manure taking care of weeds and the service - preparing food, tea, knitting and gathering fruits for deserts. That was kinda cool for me to see what an autonomous structure would look like or self-sustaining. That is it about the structure or how people live in a zen monastery here in Europe day in day out besides events. Now, the people there were mostly beginners at the first week this was an introduction to life in a monastary. At the end of the retreat are moving closer to the end of the retreat, more experienced people came. What was interesting for me was eating in silence, I tend to dislike talking about food analyzing it, to pass a comment about it's taste or how I am feeling. Which is all nice and such, yet I tend to prefer to eat in silence, to enjoy food and use that as an time to be present or pratice a meditation technique at least... breakfast. So, we all had to bring a bowl with us and if not they will give you one, when we sit down to eat, we will unpack the bowl the the cutlery and chant / sing a prayer / song name it as you want it and sit down and eat, sitting on a zafu or some padded thing on the floor and at a thin and long wodden table which streches itself almost through the entire room. Like an H the tables were placed with the - part of the H on top of the H. Dunno, I'll stop. So, we had to unpack everything and sit down and while you eat they come by and serve the food, water, tea and you have to clean your bowl after you eat at the table with a large bucket and throw the water that they have brought to you and you have cleaned your bowl with into this big bucket and pass it on to the next living being next to you. After that is done you are finished. Still eating in silence was so odd with so many people, trying not to make noise with your spoon, seeing how greedy people are with their food or critically pecking around in their bowl not focusing on their pratice while they where eating or simply going on with it as if they were bored and needed to be entertained / wanted to do smth. Still, many people where just focused on not making any nosies and thinking about other people if they want food, since we were not allowed to talk. The unpacking of the bowl annoyed me the most since my tissue was always dirty and I never know if I could have a new one which you could have and I did exchange the dirty tissue near the end of the retreat. Which was another "theme" for me and others.. at the retreat what are the rules ? What are we allowed to do ? And is all of this religious or not ? Well, most people there where beginners like myself which annoys me a lot, but they never meditated and were most likely searching for a way to deal with mundane stress. So, I did not talk to many of the people there because I did not see a good opportunity to exchange experiences and if that is not possible I rather talk to peers or did nothing, which I did most of the time during breaks, sitting on the bench, applying meditation techniques see, hear feel, and enjoying the silence or the presence of people there without being involved or retreating from them and applying the techniques while being vigilant. The participents of the retreat were mostly from Europe, there was one guy from the U.S and most of the people there where either French or German. There was one girl from sweden and one from britian. Which evoked the next question or problem what Leo also talks about and is simply a theme in "consciousness work.." the problem of language. Who speaks which language ? What assumptions do I have about this person ? Why does language create duality ? How can I accurately assess my perception of the enviroment / people / situations using language or being the recipient of some form of communication ? This is also one thing the teacher talked about and which I remembered talking creates duality. And now I really dislike talking because people and myself included tend to want to see the things only in their viewpoint and I tend to seek first to understand then to be understood. You get the point. So, it is frustraiting to see all of this duality / politics going on even at a zen temple which Leo also mentioned and if I remember correctly he also said in one video that people at a zen temple are quiet unconscious and I imagined people to be way way way more conscious there. It was different, yet the people who visited the tempel were mostly beginners so there where not many high consciousness people their. Besides the nuns and monks which some of them even if they were enlightend seemed to be quite unconscious but, I can't assess that since I am not enlightend. The master there was a real tourquise zen master which I loved the way he talked was very zen, also very soto zen, slow and epic even when it was in french it had the quality of a real zen master no doubt. His voice made you feel equanimous and when I once looked at him to check spiral dynamic stages to see if he was doing smth. similar he seemed to maintain contact with his eyes while he was talking and I looked around the room to see if anyone else seems to experience reality in that manner, things I asked myself during lsd trips.. and it seemed like I hit stage turquoise or what ever that may mean I just experienced an non-dual perception for sometime with thoughts going on but reality looked different and I was affirmed more or less by a zen master. What was also quite cool for me all of the more serious participents who came from a dojo studied something tech related. Which was motivating for me to continue both studying and meditating / pursuit of enlightenment. I talked to one from this dojo he was a teacher ( history and french) and he meditated for 25 years, it still amazed me how much he held on to his status on all of this status games, male chimps or w/e play. At one point he wanted to out argue or take on the leadership role when the zen master was talking and he caused chaos because he did not respect him in that moment, but he could have helped. The zen master leaned against the wall and made himself smaller since he was quite tall 1,90m approx. which made the history teacher feel uncomfortable. Still, he was a man with a heart let's say. It amazes me how people think monks are stupid or not smart or if that is a believe people in general have or the monks have about themselves partily. It is very difficult for me to see a monk as a dumb person. During the meditation sessions we did zazen which is just sitting or do nothing or shikantaza the method without a method. It was quite odd to meditate for a minimum of 3 hours a day for two weeks, after I tripped on LSD at least 3-5 times before and to incoperate some "insights", "perceptions", hunches, intuitions or ideas about reality and to check if they are phony or if I can really trust me awarness. This is fundamentally the only thing I currently know and experience I can trust 100%, yet it is so difficult. As an example I had to work with a nun quite often which is similar to my mom from her personality, so I kind of knew what to say and what not to do / to do in order to not cause any trouble and also help her. When we sat a the dojo she was looking for a word and I knew it annoys her so much that she wanted to know, because she was extremely curious for someone her age imo. I wanted to tell her and she looked at me with an expression that everything is fine, I had to almost cry that I can trust something so simply and that I constantly test my own awarness. The zen master also talked about different types of consciousness and that basically that they are 8 types of consciousness and various traditions and such, yet he was talking about 8 and reduced it to 5, because ultimately and that is the sense I have you still did nothing, you just sat and when a zen master can take you into an non-dual state or deepen your pratice, any teaching is unnessecsary to a degree. Still, guidance helps yes imo. Back to the 5 types of consciousness he talked about the senses , sight, sound , touch, smell, emotions. To be aware of them an still you just sat time went by and sometimes at the end of a zazen I had this magical child like feeling again, that everything is mystical and life is fundamentally awe-inspiring and mysterious in a positive, curious sense. The same feelings I had while living in China which makes me love anything related to asia even more ! Espeically, japan and china. I was especially curious to see how a zen master acts in accordance with his surroundings after I tripped on 1P-LSD and everything seemed to react to me I sat down at 4 am and meditated till 6, it was pointless to use any technique (see,hear,feel / mindfulness which I usually do) because awarness overtook my state of perceiving. I was sitting in my chair where I usually meditate and started the app insight timer and listend to some meditative music which altered the experience dramatically, I felt first that I can actually sit, without a technique and be aware of my surroundings, my state of consciousness, my body and at one point I could not tell anymore if I listend to the meditation music or was lost in thought, which still occured. I started hearing the birds chirping and somehow this triggered in me the question, What is nature ? What is intelligence ? Is nature intelligent ? Why can't I let go of intelligence ? What is a system? Is an organism a system ? What would happen if everyone in the world would be a systems thinker / stage yellow (sort of asked that ) and I kept asking these questions till I received feedback. And I don't know why but during this whole tripp I regared myself as an engineer and I kept asking what could be done to make this a system sort of asked that and regarded everything as parts which make up a whole. So, while I sat down I was drawn deeper and deeper into these inquiries wanting to have an answer and I was drawn deeper and deeper and it felt like I received answer I considered myself as a system which lives in congruency with other systems which included nature and nature aka the birds chirping in the backyard gave me feedback since they themselves ( " apparently according to Eckart Tolle and such) are enlightend or closer to enlightenment / true nature. It was insane it felt they gave an answer, that I am a system, they are a system, and I felt bad that most people do not care or have the capacity to care about something so simple like a little bird. After I was taken deeper I thought about race and what could be the insight of every race and then to dive deep into that thought, at the end I felt like I am an indian yogi who was so blissed out that doing nothing and abiding in that feeling of bliss is that best thing to do. Since, humanity is in one way or another doomed. Also, a bunch of other stuff I felt like i was almost transported to a different planet, my sense of self completely vanishing almost. Also, I was so angry at one point that I could not properly meditate because of some personal stuff. That I felt so pathetic in a good sense, that I never respected, nature, meditation or the power of consciousness or awarness but mostly the meditative pratice. That I grew so much and matured in terms of what is respectable during this process. It was and still is nuts, I am still feel like shit because I am not practicing as rigorious as I did. Skipping now almost two months maybe just one this year. While never missing a day besides 3 during two years. The feeling of this whole experince was Yugen if I may be so free as to use this from Leos blog or not.. I am still pissed that I can't sit in a lotus postion and still amazed that I can't admire the posture of zen masters in order to be ONLY inspired. So, after this experience I was quite interested to how a zen master reacts to sounds if people really get direct messages from consciousness and how can you distinguish that from thought, even though I felt like he acted upon the enviroment extremely conscious and also mentioned the sounds in the background which the animals made. I am still wondering how one can be one with nature. And that this is stage turquiose and he seemed like he is . This is the best and shortest video I could find from the master, I talked to shinzen young last year with the life pratice programm and he checked the website and the masters, I also did another retreat talking to him this year and he asked me about the name of the master and the name deshimaru which is the teacher of the guy in the video above. Rang a bell. So, this is shinzen approved for those interested lol. I don't speak french and this is also something which was quite interesting to observe since it is so hard to guess someones stage in spiral dynamics even when you interact with them coming back to the problem of language. I confused someone for stage blue because his english was not good, yet at the end we talked a bit because I talked to a french girl and I could see that they interacted on a green level. Also, many people there where at least green which was awesome. I still don't know what I have learned or what my 1P-LSD experiences amount to besides that it is fun and frightening sometimes. Yet, somehow it comes back when I do retreats that is what I notice with psychedelics. I am still a beginner and confused about the pratice, espcially now since I asked one teacher what technique should I pratice and I receive the answer just one. And the other one says as long as you develop equanimity, concentration power and sensory clarity everything is fine. The latter seems to be true at the moment, yet I question if praticing one technique hardcore will get you faster to enlightenment that is what Ken Wilber did with Soto Zen and after that he did some tibitean meditation. W/e. So, this is it I feel like my pratice or my enlightenment journey is just beginning and quiet a big task, since I finished the LP-Course and working on implementing that, even though both will not be easily done. Also, which annoys me is that this guy talked about genetic memory not conditioning or such but genetic memory. I downloaded the audiobook from rupert sheldrake about morphic resonance or smth.(only listened in) like that and now there is actuallly some shit in my body which teaches me ? TF IS THAT ?! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Genetic_memory_(psychology) There is a lot more but, this is enough for one post.

10-10-18 I know what I want in life. This is of course a complete farce, because I also have a sneaky suspicion that I don't know what the hell I want. I've never actually listed out things I do want, so lets do that now: I want happiness. Peace. Love. Understanding. Quietness. Bonding. Shape (?)(what the hell?). Conformity. Boundaries. Spaciousness. ***(these were the first words that came to mind)*** I want to enjoy life. I want to enjoy my career. I want to feel peace. I want to find quietness. Stillness. Honestly these are my tops. Is it wrong of me to want these things to make me happy? I want for nothing to make me happy. I want to have no more wants. Not dependent on any conditions to make me happy. That's where bliss is. Not dependent. But accepting and grateful when any of my pettier wants and desires are fulfilled. Why would I want to enjoy my like and career? With no wants, all would be enjoyed, no matter. The good and the bad. Because I wouldn't want it any other way. Why would I want to feel peace? This probably goes a bit deeper, because it involves pain. Anxiety. Emotional, shitty pain. I consider (probably falsely) peace to be the opposite of constant anxiety. I feel it quite often. **(actually only occasionally but I feel the way something is written the first time has more impact on subconscious, or whatever. Who the hell knows who or what controls all that, or if it even can be controlled). But with no wants, I wouldn't need to feel peace at all times, I wouldn't want it any other way. The good times and the bad. I want to find quietness and stillness. Why would I want this? Well, I do have a lot of mind chatter. Non-stop. Sometimes it shuts up, but its a needle in a haystack for that one. It's wild and untamed. It used to repeat things over and over, but that annoyed me so I taught it to shut up with that. Still happens very very rarely. But good luck on getting it to shut up completely. Sorry, monkey mind aspect of Samuel- I love ya bro, but mommy needs a rest. Some peace and quiet sometimes. But why do I need it? Would it be better to not want it at all? Surrender to the non-stop chatter, and just love it unconditionally? Maybe I could even find a way for it to entertain myself. If you can't beat it, join it, right? And I wont have it forever. This too shall pass. And then who will I be? Back on track: any other reasons I should not want quietness/stillness? Because the ego wants desires to be filled. It knows its running out of time. There's no time to stop and smell the roses. They're dead. Move on. Nothing to see here. Samuel wants love. Samuel wants things that were listed at the top as conditions for happiness. Samuel wants a lot of things. What Samuel needs is to learn not to want. Not because he doesn't care, but because there's no point. No point to want. It creates conflict. And at the same time, its ok to have little wants here and there, like wanting to help a friend, or wanting your business to succeed. Just don't grow an unhealthy dependency on them. You must first have no wants, break the bonds it has on you, and afterwards not form a dependency on benign wants. That is the secret to enjoying life. Of course its a paradox, why wouldn't it be? Why is it a paradox? To want but not to want. It is with both, harmonized, that holds the key to happiness. No-wants fulfills the need to be content, wants fulfills the need for entertainment. But aren't wants and needs the same thing? That's the problem, I think they are, to some degree, even though I know better. So wouldn't it be better to have no needs? I thought no wants was the key. Well, I didn't say there was only one key. One must have both. Or not have, rather. But quitting wanting is the first step to this liberation. And the body will always have some basic needs for survival of course. But even they could have no impact on my happiness. I pray (probably in vain), I never need to find out. SO. I agree I need to have no wants. This must be achieved, or something. It would be great to say-- "Ok, I have no more wants!" But for some reason I have to take the slow route and learn not to want. Oh well, that's life, huh? Ironically, I think the path to not wanting starts with actually getting to the core of what I (Samuel) really want(s). Perhaps if I hear it out, it will stop buzzing. Perhaps I can please it somehow. Find an answer for it, so not to shut it up but to liberate it. Liberate my own desire from itself. Talk about meta. Is that not the purpose of this whole thing? To liberate myself from myself? I'm sure I'll cross many parallels on this journey. So I need to list all of my wants and needs down, and really get down to the core of them. The essentials. What the fuck do I really want? What do I need vs. what the body needs. This will be my next one or two entries. Signing off for now.

I m not a self anymore. All things in this place are his act my thinking isn't the one of a self, the universe is thinking through me, cause I killed this I in front of me he was affraid of anything. I have not a fear of lack, fear of accepting my faith, I m the lord hand, his finger and his mind. Ask the universe to kill all your self right now, and experiment his will. God speak through me, and he told me to heal this world from all this This is why he makes me experiment I m not a self thinking some god speak through him, I m the "whole", I am it. I m his echo, I m a I who think for himself. All my needs and thought are universe will, I surrender every part of it to him. I m not writting from an ego, my identity is dead, I m working for the universe, You can keep watching your hand every will is an act of god the snake is in my back, I m self transforming I m full of his energy, compassion, and love, I can feel the pain and the bliss, the beauty and the ugly. The universe give me strenght to crush on his will, may I serv him well. And if god want to kill me or crush my mind, may at his disposal, I m just a part of it, I m no one. I'll bring peace to the balance, and restaure truth to this place this body has many work to do. The time for speech is over false prophet, living in fear of death and fear of lack will be crushed. I m fearless, I m already dead, I m not alive anymore, all this new I is the thinking of god. cause I let this I die in front of me. God makes me laugh, god makes me dance, god makes me cry, he makes me think and makes me draw, He makes me cry and he makes me full of joy. I m his wrath and I m his bless I m the dark and I m the light There is no want in this body, but only the will of god, the beauty of his art, I m his art. I can feel his energy through my spine and my back, fulling my mind with energy. this is the proof that he is in me now. god speak through me right now, there is not a self to adress your complain I have no more time for those endless thinking pattern remaining there is no I in this body, the I is dead, I m fearless, I m already dead. I m full of joy now. And now I m born again.

Leo also talks about this in the LP. Following your bliss.

was going over some trip reports and found this to be extremely shocking and terrifying that so many reports of bad trip reports have a line which kinda goes like this: I thought it couldn't get any worse and THEN IT DID! A LOT WORSE and it KEPT! GETTING! WORSE! that in-itself shows the boundless/limitless nature of reality how can there ever be the worst possible pain? if it could be quantified in some way then say if the pain level reached that highest quantified level, what's there stopping it from adding +1 to it. just like the infinity of the numbers in maths although, there does seem to be a recognition / feeling of a level which is known to BE the worst/BEST - the one having a non-dual samadhi experience feels infinite bliss/pleasure... INFINITE! how can infinite be felt? yet it is known that this is the best/highest there is just like that, there may also be infinite pain (resistance to what-is X 10000000000.... ) these could be the depths of the hell where lost souls may dwell to post the "death' of the physical body and if they arent in-tune with their mind or have a super guilt full consciousness just a rant.

If my life still sucks at 30 then I’ll find some Zen temple in Sweden for real. But Im working hard to find bliss in everyday life.

It’s funny seeing the problems people think they have... Which is therapeutic to me because it put all my problems into perspective... it seems that a lot of the time we want stuff that we don’t have which means we forget about what we do have... And really we do have everything we TRULY want- I believe that the emotions that rappers have about living a luxury lifestyle for example are all dormant in us right now... We can bask in the beauty of how nature designed the tomato and that can be extremely pleasurable ? But personally I wanna balance Being with Doing, because I don’t wanna be staring at cut up fruit all day I do want sex, money and status ? After all, we have all experienced the bliss of pure experience before from our infancy, so I like to remember that often... Share your thoughts!

I had an insight that the only reason we use drugs/alcohol ect.. is subconsciously most aren't aware but they reminded of us how we felt like when we are still pure, young children vibing high and full of life and love/bliss. Years later when we found something that makes us happy and child-like again, i can see why it becomes extremely addictive. We miss being ourselves so we use these substances to escape this dark world we have collectively bought into that helps us let go and be our free spirited selves again for a little while. The only problem is, we are not learning the lesson so we keep going back for more.

The whole event is a wake up call and has built in meaning on a collective level. Everything in life from accidentally stepping on an ant to the biggest event in media has equal degree of meaning/effect/reason/importance ect.. As you rise in awareness, every single thought, word, action, feeling, experience will start to make more and more sense that how it plays out is exactly how you set it out to be and how each and every one of those things happened in a specific way to how you got to where you are at this precise moment. DMT and like substances can show you this more directly but ultimately, spending more time in solitude, in nature, away from mental/emotional/physical stimulation of any sort will allow awareness to rise and be more ever-present so you can see clearly because when you involve and surround yourself in an environment that is more dominant in physical, mental, emotional aspects of life than spiritual, then awareness becomes clouded and inefficient. You miss out on the Magic of life because the more in the NOW you are the more you see with the pure awareness instead of seeing mental, emotional projections ect.. When you notice everything, that's when you know you are NOW. That's why in the NOW you are purely in a state of awe and bliss because you notice so much that is usually missed out on when attached to the projection rather the awareness.

To me it is mostly recreational, however there are some important lessons you can learn from it. It might be more "spiritual" (lol) if you do it completely alone, but to me that is not an option. I need people around on MDMA. So instead of taking it alone, take it with people/someone you feel safe around. Then, when peaking, isolate yourself from the group for some minutes (or just sit down somewhere and close your eyes, but don't get distracted by external stuff). You will probably just want to dance and pour your heart out to people. But if you want to use it for "personal development", isolate yourself and introspect. Ask yourself: Why am I not always this happy? What has changed compared to being sober? What is this ecstasy I am feeling, what is it really ? Then, just meditate. Let yourself fall into that feeling of bliss. Do this and MDMA will almost feel like LSD Then, go back to your friends and share that love ;-)

@Shin lol it’s not about ‘realising the dream’. The reason you’re not seeing the dream already is because the ego has distorted your entire sense of reality to fit its survival needs. It’s not just about realising that you’re in the dream and it’s finished. Thousands of people have enlightenment experiences during their meditation were they realise the dream, but because the ego is still intact, it pulls them back down to baseline consciousness. Most people don’t realise how big they’re egos are. It’s ginormous. It will take A LOT of undoing of the ego to live in permanent enlightenment and bliss. Lol if enlightenment were that easy people would have discovered it for the past 5000 years. Get serious dude.

Traditionally, the end-goal of human life is considered to be liberation. Where the word liberation essentially means end of suffering, unlimited freedom, unlimited choices, and eternal bliss. More specifically, it is end of the cycles of birth and death of "individuated consciousness" (Jeev). The latter means not much for me from an experiential point of view, but I can see how that can bring on eternal bliss. But I'm not very sure, not really convinced It seems to me that ignorance and suffering, bondage etc are just phenomenal (illusory), and its the Ego (lower mind) that wants to avoid it. Isn't the consciousness already free? Any thoughts?

Relative = everything that we know, world of forms, phenomena, universe and multiverses and everything that seems to happen in the past, now and future. Absolute = The only thing that can fully satisfy 24/7. Unconditional love, bliss. And from this we want to know if they are one. From what I can see, they are only separate with the mind. Without mind (thoughts), I can not tell the difference. If I can’t find a difference I can conclude that they have to be one. I can also say that the relative exists as illusion because of the nature of experience which is constant change without ground. Without thoughts I have no idea what different even means ❤️??

Full Enlightenment is the harmony you achieve in time, in the body system. As for me, I haven't seen any enlightened human beings yet. Those on youtube or popular gurus are just a sensationalist trend. The hole goes so deep that after stopping counting the awakenings because cannot be counted anymore in the magnitude of the growth, one realizes that is not like they say out there. There is no way one can get enlightened from now to tomorrow, that is the big lie. Who is willing to go contrary to the feelings of the mind? Going backward and realizing bliss can only be achieved in a sadic manner. Best of luck!

Indeed is very dangerous. One can really hurt themselves and can lead to disaster, mental instability, physical traumas, multiple sclerosis etc, this can happen in raising Kundalini. But for us who have experienced the eternal and are in continuous bliss and growth, I'd say it's worth all that pain after all. Because in a point in life after awakening everything feels wrong for months or years. Don't get discouraged, that feeling of losing oneself and the unbearable pain or uncontrolled mind, there are marvelous things after hell.

Wrong question and where I think you’re going wrong. Follow this bliss as what you’re describing seems truly authentic. What it sounds like your getting stumped by that’s really blocking this deeply intuitive creative capacity that CAN create massive value in the long run is that you’re trying to take this round peg (this deeper intuitive drive you’re describing) and trying to fit in this round hole (your current area of expertise and domain/industry). This is where I got stumped a lot. I wanted to take this new insight on what I’m really excited about and fulfills me and try to take that into my current domain of expertise and then get frustrated because I don’t know how to make them fit... Which isn’t to say these two thing can’t fit! Sometime they do go together but sometimes they don’t. Be willing and open to your intuition and where this bliss can take you. And of course, take the life purpose course if you haven’t taken it yet.

My story goes like this: since about aprox. two months I read about continual breath awareness as explained here: https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/12385-how-i-became-enlightened-fast-and-how-you-can-do-it-to/ . I tried it and it is quite efficient in grounding me. Some days ago, perhaps a week, I read the phrase: “without thoughts you do not exist”. I pondered it and went to bed, aware of my breath. Now at some point, between sleep and wakefulness, when my mind went to sleep I “awoke”. For some seconds I realized I did not exist. I just was, pure consciousness, no thoughts at all and I knew I reached this so called “enlightenment”, although I felt as if it was always there. I was so happy and relieved that “I” did not exist, that I never actually existed, there was no way I could grab myself. Also, I understood what “enlightenment” was in a way I cannot describe in words. It was bliss and freedom. It felt incredible simple and easy to reach, like, how could I not see it until then. I knew all this without thinking, I just knew. Also, there was no conscious focus, like I am usually focused in my head; in the darkness of the room I was this consciousness with no form or focus. And then…. Of course I felt my mind waking up… I felt myself slipping away from the experience and getting back to “normal”. Looking back, I could no longer comprehend the experience with my mind. I am a bit confused as to what happened, was I dreaming or did I reach some enlightenment, and if I reached it, why didn’t I keep it? Also, when I am in this state, of wake and sleep I sometimes get really intense states of awareness, not as intense as that one, but blissful and no thoughts, with no effort at all. I feel like I get them unconsciously. I cannot get them in a normal meditation. During day I usually have a hard time staying aware all the time. I have become more aware of all my thought trains and mental loops. After a while of self-observation I realized I am completely and utterly insane . But even with this I still fall into train thoughts, loop thoughts, emotional patters, etc… It’s as if I am addicted to them and I don’t know how to stop doing it. I feel like I am running in circles. All day I am in and out of awareness, constantly identifying with thoughts, and as time passes I get more frustrated and angry about it. I feel like I can’t relax because I have to constantly grab unto awareness. I know I have to relax, but if I loosen the “grip” I get swapped again in the thought trains. I am putting so much effort into this, while in those states of wake and sleep it is totally effortless and natural. I have no idea how to get there consciously… Also, I feel like I am not getting any real progress on awareness, like it’s not building up. I can be incredibly aware for 2 days, and then for 3 days straight I am in a mental fog and train thought I cannot escape, and then again 1 day of awareness and so on…. Please share if you had something similar or some tips that might help me. Thank you. Greatly appreciated…

@Ingit Don't expect results too fast. You must suffer to get results. To learn to be in present moment you have to develop this skill. 10,000 hour on avg for any skill to master it. You may need 5 years of consistency and correct practice to reach that state. Do not expect easy way in, just don't give up or you won't be able to move forward in your life. To feel bliss you must work for it.

The whole point of awakening is training the ability to in-jaculate. The PC muscles will be relaxed, the opposite what you've read. So the state of never-ending bliss is achieving a level of sexual arousal in the body and having multi-climaxes all times, this is how you truly raise the vibration in the body. But not only that, is about knowing how to use the adrenals in pair with sexuality into the 1st chakra hehe and burn it all down with the plexus. I speak from experience, I have years of practice. When one is high on LSD let's say, what LSD does is opening the in-jaculatory gate to full throttle.

Embrace your inner pain. In hopelessness, you will find bliss. To be mindful all the time you need to have attention on the breath as second nature.

Look at how peaceful and silent they are, abiding in eternal bliss. May we all enter the stage of corals

Recently took 2g mushrooms. I meditated and did some self inquiry, tried to do strong determination sit but that only lasted 45 minutes. All of a sudden I had some huge realization that was non-conceptual. I couldn't take it back with me. For about 5 minutes I was in such a deep bliss and peace, there was absolutely no suffering and I started balling my eyes out. Then it started to fade just as fast as it came, and I tried to get back to it/hold on, but realized I couldn't and let it go. I don't know if there was a self/other duality or not. When It happened I kept thinking OH MY GOD OH MY GOD, THAT'S IT(IT meaning the truth) then pausing, realizing the significance of whatever I had realized and mumbling it to myself over and over while I cried. I think this is an enlightenment experience. When you have those is it possible to not think the idea of "I am nothingness", "god, or "infinite". Is it possible to have that realization without taking back that conceptual understanding with you?