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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-QCCz4mtd0E I'm not sure if the artist was going for this, I read briefly the song was written about someone with addiction. But doesn't it sound like he's talking nonduality?

So I was that excellent A grader back in primary and secondary school. I was polite, I was nice and I had poor social skills. And I had this complex that my head is too big. I mean it was huge but nothing to be shy about. But back then it was a real deal. And everyone was laughing at me. They called me the TV-guy, Square-guy, Huge-Head and so on. In high school this complex gone away as I healed myself a little bit. But it was still a present to certain extent and some people still made laugh at me. And the moment it stopped bothering me, people stopped making laugh of me. That's such an example of nonduality it shocks and terrifies me. Wow. It was all in me. My head haven't suddenly shrink. It was the same for years, since secondary school. Crazy. Do you have some other proofs?

Spiritual Autolysis - Journal Entry #45 - Wed Sep 6th '23 - 8:50 AM 13.*Look around and say to yourself* A meaningless world engenders fear. *Close your eyes.* A meaningless world engenders fear because I think I am in competition with God. "To move forward, you must figure out exactly what is obstructing you. Whatever it is, it isn’t really there; it has no reality, no substance. It’s your own creation, a phantom lurking in the shadows of your mind, a shadow demon. Your obstructions are your demons, and your demons are shadow dwellers. They live and thrive in the half-light of ignorance, so the way to slay a demon is by illuminating it with the full force and power of your focused attention; by looking at it, hard. Banish shadow with light and see for yourself that no obstruction exists, nor ever did. We create our demons and we feed them. To awaken we must slay them. That’s really the whole process: Slay one demon, take one step. Repeat." ~ from Spiritually Incorrect Enlightenment by Jed McKenna Higher self: Lets take this duality conversation one step further. If duality does not exist, what else does that mean? We established that the thought of two things being opposites is an illusion, according to this insight, what else is an illusion? Lower self: Everything. Everything is an illusion. Higher self: Okay... Give me an example. Lower self: My entire life story is an illusion. Everything about it. My past is an illusion. My friends are an illusion. My cat .. an illusion. The people that I love... Illusion. Higher self: How do you know they are an illusion? I feel like you're just saying these things with no way of backing it up or proving it. You don't truly understand the magnitude of these statements. And what does this have to do with nonduality? Lower self: Nonduality is "all is one." That's literally what it means to be nondual. That means that there is nothing outside of it, which means that anything that is finite or separate, such as my puny little body and my memories and thoughts and family and circle of friends, they are all nondual. Everything is nondual. Higher self: Hmmm. Okay that's interesting, but there are still finite things, you must admit. The chair has a different makeup than the table and than a physical human body. Lower self: Not in the absolute sense, there is no difference between the two, not really. The difference between the two has been constructed in our own minds. The chair and the human are one and the same. Higher self: Hmmm... Interesting.. but you care about the survival of the human body more than the chair that you are sitting on. Lower self: Yes of course because I want to live. I don't want to die. I don't care about that chair because I don't live through the chair, I live through this physical body. I am selfish, we all must be in order to survive. Higher self: Can you transcend survival? Lower self: Yeah probably, but I think that we are all scared to because then we will literally be okay with dieing. Higher self: Well that's where you're headed if you continue down this path... Is that a demon that you are willing to face... Lower self: Errrrrr... Yes, I think so.

I saw there was no post about the actual list of worksheets and home assignments so i made one (maybe there already is one but anyway) Here it is (not including, websites, and links to articles and papers): Paradoxes Of Personal Development: Curing Perfectionism - How To Stop Being A Perfectionist: The Mechanics Of Belief: How To Harness Your Intuition: The Trap Of Projection, Especially Onto Teachers & Mentors: A Rant Against Culture: Money Psychology - The Inner Game of Mastering Money: Mystical Traditions Around The World - Nonduality Goes Cosmopolitan!: Uncovering Your Childhood Vows - Unwire Your Neurotic Personality: The Pre-mortem Technique - The Trick To Avoiding Project Failure: Dropping The Roles You Play: Build Your Infrastructure For Success: Understanding How Paradigms Work; What Is Love? - Part 2 - The Brutal Nature Of Love How Fear Works - Part 2 - The Ultimate Guide To Dealing With Fear How Corruption Works What Is Insight? - How To Become More Insightful:

nonduality reduces God down to a primordial consciousness. it's bottom-up. nonduality wants to transcend the individual self. absolute solipsism recognizes the individual self as an eternal fact. God is top-down, not bottom-up. Therefore God is never fully realized. God is infinitely mysterious because the self can never be transcended. The self excludes all other self's. totally inescapable. imagine a ball of yarn. every string is an individual stream of consciousness. the individual stream is infinite, eternal and absolute. God does not split itself into individuals. individuals are, always have been, and always will be. Oversimplification and obsession with parsimony at all costs is a fool's errand. there is nothing simple about God.

@Razard86 I haven’t got to the point of nonduality but I’ve realised that as a relative truth, you have the power to create anything you see fit or there are synchronicities with the things you ask for, as long as they are, for lack of a explanatory way of saying this, in alignment. These powerful thoughts come from the Self rather than the ego, if we are using Jungian language. It’s more of an intention, rather than a want. Also, your words and actions have a connection with what is going to come next, but, you may be not realising how far it goes. Then again, everything’s predetermined, but, I think it’s better to think of it as I have power.

Spiritual Autolysis - Journal Entry #44 - Mon Sep 4th '23 - 1:56 PM Lower self: The statement nonduality is true is in itself a paradox. It's a paradox because for nonduality to be true, the duality of true and false must not be true.How about the statement duality is false? Higher self: How about this, what does it mean to be false? Lower self: To be false is to be not true. Something that is false... Well actually for something to be false. Someone must have thought that it was true at one point and then realized that it was false afterwards. For example, the earth is flat, this is a false statement. We know that the earth is round, but humans used to think that the earth was flat, then we realized that this is false. Then maybe one day we will realize that the earth isn't round and it's actually square shaped (idk). The point I'm trying to make is that these things are relative. In truth work, we are not looking for relative truths, we are looking for absolute truths. What is the difference between relative and absolute truths? Higher self: An absolute truth is something that without a doubt, cannot be questioned, it knows itself is true, it doesn't need anything else to validate that it is true. That is what we are after here, so let's not get stuck on all of these relative truths, such as the nature of the duality of truth vs falsehood. Lower self: But isn't this an important distinction to make? Why does absolute truth fall outside of the realm of duality?? Higher self: Because there is no absolute falsehood. For there to be falsehood, there must be truth, and that's just not what we're after here. We could find falsehood if we wanted to, absolute falsehood. Is that what you want to find? Lower self: Not particularly. But while we're in the subject, what does absolute falsehood look like? Higher self: Why does it matter? True and false are not opposites. Haven't we established this? That is what we mean by the statement dualities are an illusion. Falsehood still exists and absolute truth still exists, so what are we even talking about here? You are not using the duality of truth and falsehood in the work that you are doing. The duality between the two is the illusion, or the relationship between the two is the illusion. You are simply finding out what's true. That is it. Something being false has nothing to do with it. Lower self: Okay but if something is false, then it is not true, correct? Higher self: No! They're not opposites! That's the problem that you keep running into! Lower self: But can something be true and false at the same time? Nuh uh... I don't think so... Higher self: On the relative scale, something can be true to one person and false to another person. For example, one person thinks that God is real, that is his truth, another thinks God is not real, that is his truth. Who's right? Who's truth is correct? Neither! Neither is, they are just opinions. Lower self: Yes but if there is an absolute truth and an absolute falsehood and in this perfect example, we are speaking about God, one of these people is absolutely true and the other is absolutely false. Higher self: No! You are still using the duality! Lower self: What do you mean? Higher self: The duality of truth and false does not exist, correct? Lower self: Yes.. Higher self: That means that there is no difference between truth and false in the absolute sense, they are one and the same... Lower self: Then what the fuck are we doing?? What is the point of this work? Higher self: It's to get you to that point, where you actually understand what we're talking about here! You don't understand it, do you? Lower self: No! How could I?! It makes no sense! Higher self: Okay, let's back up here for a moment, do you understand what I am saying when I say that the duality of truth and false is not real? Do you understand how significant this is. Every time truth pops into your head, you are thinking of its opposite, falsehood. I am trying to get you to stop doing that. The reason for this is because we have already established the duality between truth and falsehood is imaginary, it is not real. That means that there is NO RELATIONSHIP between the two. Are you starting to understand that? Lower self: Yes.. yes.. I understand now.. Higher self: And that means that the word false does not belong here, there is no point in using it. We are looking for TRUTH. That is it, no attachments, no return engagements, no encore. TRUTH. Lower self: Yes, I understand..

This is my first topic. I did a book review already but am not counting that really. This is the first time I've taken the plunge and worked up the courage to ask a question "in front of the class". I'm not expecting long answers from people. In the context of this ramble, how would you describe the possible benefits of nonduality philosophy to me Is it correct to call it a philosophy? I'm not looking for people to do my work for me. I'm not being lazy. I'm just stuck in my current level of understanding. I'm not sure if I should try and understand nonduality or just let that sleeping dog lie for now. I can't work out whether it's something I should have as a foundation (such as deciding if I buy into it or not), or whether it's something that I should consider later on. I really didn't want to ask this. I honestly have tried to read around and use the search function on here. I've read what Nahm has written (via his signature) but I do need to watch the video's in his link. However, from everything I've read online and listened to via YouTube I still can't ascertain what's the benefit to me of (a) understanding nonduality and then possibly (b) buying into it. I get like this with self-development. I can obsess a bit too much on things that might be small detail or not relevant to my needs. I fear if I don't try and understand something I am missing out somehow. Not sure if you need to know some basics about me, or whether it's irrelevant what my little plans and dreams are..... For the last few months I've been getting my feet wet with basic Buddhist teachings. I'm also finding parts of the Bible incredibly uplifting, and much more practical than I thought the Bible would be. I don't know what I think about God. I'm not sure who God is or how God works. I (think) I believe at the minimum there is some Higher Power relevant and active in my life. I feel like I am looked after and that I am supposed to follow a path. With the thoughts I am conscious of, my immediate and primary goal is to manage my general fear, insecurities, to be able to better handle uncertainty, to better manage resentments I hold against people, and to move away from my ego (as I understand my ego to be). To move away from animal instinct behaviour. I want to be cool, calm, and collected. Kind to others. Forget myself. Get outside my own head. My most cherished values at the moment seem to be around openmindedness and humility. If I can get these right I think other good stuff can manifest, such as compassion, forgiveness, gratitude and resilience. I have all these qualities to a degree, but I want more, and better still, I want these values to be better reflected in my behaviour.

Spiritual Autolysis - Journal Entry #43 - Mon Sep 4th '23 - 9:39 AM Higher self: Okay so we have realized that nonduality is closer to truth than duality. But why? Why is that? Lower self: Well the other day we were dissecting these paradoxes, in which a statement can be right and wrong at the same time, which got us thinking about all of the dualities in the world, ie all of the seemingly opposite things.. such as boy vs girl, positive vs negative, right vs wrong, right vs left, good vs evil. What we discovered is that it is really all one thing, everything is enveloped into one thing. Now what is that thing that everything is enveloped into... That is what we are here to find out.. to summarize, all dualities are an illusion that the human mind has made up in order to categorize things for its own survival needs. Okay now what is next after finding out about nonduality. I feel as though I am missing something there, I don't feel true clarity on the subject. Higher self: Why don't you feel clarity? Lower self: I don't know.. I feel as though I still don't understand what a paradox is.. Higher self: Okay.. then let's go through one.. non-existence exists. Two seemingly opposite statements yet somehow the statement is true, it's true and false at the same time (seemingly) Lower self: This is a paradox. It doesn't make sense to the human brain because we live in a world where we think dualities exist when they really do not. Dualities are not real, the world is non dual. These sorts of statements prove this. Higher self: How and why do these paradoxical statements prove that nonduality is more true than duality? Lower self: Because for a statement to have two polar opposites elements within it and also make sense or be accurate, that means that there must be an issue with the duality of the two opposite elements. If non existence and existence are actually the same thing at its core, then the statement "non-existence exists" would make sense because they do not contradict each other. Us humans have defined these two things as opposites, but in reality they are not. Higher self: Existence does not exist. Is this statement true? Lower self: Not true. Existence does exist. Existence is the existing of something, it is there, it is present, therefore "Existence does not exist" is a false statement. Higher self: What about true and false, isn't that a duality that, according to you, is "just an illusion?" Here lies the problem, you are saying that nonduality is true or at least more true than duality, but at the same time you are using the duality of true and false in the work that you are doing right now. Isn't that contradictory? If duality is made up or false then what is the difference between true and false? There shouldn't be any difference if there are no opposites, which means that there shouldn't be any difference between what is true and what is false, correct? Yet you are sitting over there saying this statement is true and that statement is false. Lower self: Hmmm...

Here is my attempt to integrate nonduality and evolution. I came to think that nonduality means that reality is changeless. Because if there is some process or entity being able to change reality then that is something changing something else and therefore duality. And if reality changes itself then "what is" turns into "what is not" which again is duality. Leo said in some video that reality is not all possibilities. Reality is all the BEST possibilities, he said. And that I think explains both nonduality and evolution. The process of evolution is necessary as a part of the best possibilities in order to produce beings such as us humans growing and learning and becoming unique creators with more and more power. So the suffering and evil we experience in our little world at the moment is just a temporary learning, development and growth "tool". The content of reality can be modeled as an infinite string of information containing all the best possibilities including the process of evolution. That string of information is changeless! And timeless! And time appears as a result of experiencing the entire string of information in a single instant, which is this present moment we live in. This experience will go on forever since the string of information is infinite. What is nondual is the whole infinite string of information as a whole. The string just is, and it's simply one out of all possible strings of information. For example a binary string like 01010101010101010... wouldn't produce any universe or evolution, but out of the set of all possible infinite strings at least one is able to produce the universe we live in.

Lol, I don't want to accept? Says fucking who? Of course I didn't pull any of this out of thin air. Neither did you (or anyone else, for that matter). Where would you be without Leo's videos, this forum, Sadguru's teachings? Where would Leo be without all of the stuff he's been studying over the past decade? Where would Sadguru be without his Indian upbringing and studies of Yogic traditions? See, that's the magic of duality: All things are interconnected in an endless divine dance, touching, nudging and influencing each other, passing along the torch and sharing the common energy. Where do you draw the line between "your" wisdom and someone else's? Between "your" life story and that of other people? And yet there is the appearance of otherness that makes life so endlessly entertaining and fascinating; and yet there is "me" over here and "you" over there! THAT is the paradoxical beauty of existence! And yet you use the persona to get ahead in life and have an absolute ball along the way. I mean, just look at us two jokers, pretending to be two different people, arguing and bickering for the sheer glorious heck of it! THIS is what puts all beauty and spice into life, for heaven's sake! Don't you see it? Duality is the greatest gift that God has ever created for itself. Without it, you could not have any experience of any kind whatsoever, so learn to appreciate it, my friend. Like I said in the previous post: The fact that there are black letters on a white screen in front of me is proof of duality (aka. form). Sure, duality is "just an appearance", but that appearance itself is an undeniable aspect of reality. But guess what, duality and nonduality are not really opposed to each other; they are nothing but two sides of the exact same coin, two complementary facets of the oneness of existence. Look at this picture: What do you see? My guess is that you see a circle with black and white shapes inside. Right? But wait... how can this be? Isn't all just one? Then how can there possibly be black on the one side and white on the other? Shouldn't it just be one uniformous blob of... nothing? Well, here's the divine joke of existence: Black and white are different from each other (because otherwise you could not perceive/experience them), and yet they form one big whole which is all one. They are different, and yet the are same! Just like two dance partners who perform different moves and yet dance the same dance. And the big paradoxical mindfuck is that without the appearance of non-unity, the unity of the whole would not be visible! As I said, it's a giant paradox. Don't even try to understand it intellectually... just put on your dancing shoes and join the fun.

Again... "I am a man, not a woman". Your words, not mine. Being a man vs. being a woman = duality. The relative aspect of existence. Being Consciousness/All That Is = nonduality. The absolute aspect of existence. When you are referring to yourself as "Javier" during your day-to-day interactions with other people, you are paying tribute to the relative aspect of existence. When you come to this subforum and put on your Mr. Awakened Guy persona, you are also immersed in the game of relativity/duality... you just don't (seem to) realize it. Are you interested in keeping this body alive? If so, why? If the body is a tool, then what are you using it for? These are all questions that pertain to the relative domain. You are both the form and that which is aware of it. AT ALL TIMES. You are literally EVERYTHING, don't you see? Or rather, consciousness is everything... the dream as well as the dreamer. Is this paradoxical? Yes. But that doesn't mean that it isn't true.

reposting from my journal: how monadology /absolute solipsism differs from nonduality The Mind At Large in Bernardo Kastrup’s theory, the mind at large divides itself into multiple perspectives. Kastrup doesn’t believe mind at large is particularly intelligent, as it is a simple primordial consciousness. upon death the individual’s consciousness becomes one with the mind at large Absole Solipsism in contrast, absolute solipsism recognizes that the Self is absolutely exclusive. there is no merging with the mind at large because the Self IS a mind at large, one of an infinite number of minds at large. Therefore God, the totality, is not a simple primordial consciousness but the totality of infinite soverign Selfs or Monads. in other words, God is not a simple substance, God is infinite complexity of infinite souls interrelating with one another. the individual “I” is not a temporary dissociation from the mind at large, it’s an absolute.

how monadology /absolute solipsism differs from nonduality The Mind At Large in Bernardo Kastrup’s theory, the mind at large divides itself into multiple perspectives. Kastrup doesn’t believe mind at large is particularly intelligent, as it is a simple primordial consciousness. upon death the individual’s consciousness becomes one with the mind at large Absole Solipsism in contrast, absolute solipsism recognizes that the Self is absolutely exclusive. there is no merging with the mind at large because the Self IS a mind at large, one of an infinite number of minds at large. Therefore God, the totality, is not a simple primordial consciousness but the totality of infinite soverign Selfs or Monads. in other words, God is not a simple substance, God is infinite complexity of infinite souls interrelating with one another. the individual “I” is not a temporary dissociation from the mind at large, it’s an absolute.

Reality is not non-dual Reality is dual Reality is fragmented Fragmented into so many tiny pieces Pieces, things made up of things, and more things That can not be explained, or known, or understand All forming one reality But reality is dual so there is many uncounted things in Existance Since reality is only many things, Reality does not exist, it is only the sum, the total of all that exists. And there are many totals. So a total does not exist. Reality is an illusion Existance, is an illusion For what existed formally does not appear now or enter our senses. Concuousness, is just a mechanical system done by your brain. However, no one can say that Existance or non existance exists or does not exist. It can only be known through concuousness. And you cannot say you exist or not as a body because you cannot say if anything is a thing or not a thing. Because it could exist or it can not exist. It can only be known through concuousness You can not know if concuousness exists, or not But you are conceous. Yet concuousness is the only one thing to be known to exist. Nothing else Yet everything exists So what's the difference between concuousness and non concuousness And who's to say that anything contrasts with Existance. There is not a thing that contests Existance So it is eternal it is infinate It is one, it is all It is whole and the sum of the parts In what it is. And who's to say that there is a distinction between the reader or me The typer and you Anything and you Not and you It is all I I

Just wondering if anyone else has experienced this... Since I started to realise that perhaps not everything is what is seems (we are not the body, and probably don't exist etc) I've noticed that my sex drive has completely disappeared... Like, I still sort of find the form of a woman appealing... but not like I used to... I mean, we are not the body. It's just a bunch of particles, isn't it? What's attractive about a bunch of carbon particles and molecules? I went from having a ridiculous sex drive to next to nothing really.. I have no desire to make love to my 'Self'... just seems a bit weird. Anyone else experienced the same?

life is automatic and Being is just percieving whatever this body is doing without controling it, as if it was watching a movie and coudn't change the script? (help me if doesn't make any sense) I'm also noticing the paralels beetween the awake and lucid dream states relating to the way my mind fear to surrender and desire to control the situation, in the context of lucid dreaming, I don't get very far, I feel like I am not in control, that obviously scares the ego and ends the experience. In those lucid dreams, I get deeply involved to the surroudings, as if there is no "me", and everything is just rolling like a movie, and if I ever try to manipulate the dream (ego fear/ general thinking), it will end. Also, is it legit to achieve nonduality through lucid dreaming? Or nonduality cannot exist within a dream

There are many women mystical people but female spirituality is different in style. They are more like witches, fortune tellers, Reiki people. Example: Teal Swan. Strict nonduality/awakening has a masculine bias baked into it. Most women will not find it appealing. However they will find stuff like yoga or witchcraft appealing.

So it is Wednesday and tonight I got drunk again yay. (It has been a week). Now on the spiritual path many people preach "addictions" and "bad shit" and "alcohol" and "carbs" and how all things have to be avoided to be "enlightened". Lol. But nondoership. You see, at some point, you become aware there is no you and you don't have control over what you do. You are just along for the ride! Well I am drunk, so should I be feeling guilty for drinking? If so...how do I feel guilty for being drunk when I am not a doer, I didn't get drunk as there is no I to get drunk. Consciousness used to to get drunk to experience this moment, as a drunk. Do you see the problem here? On one hand these teacher preach nonduality and nondoership. On the same hand, they preach how you gotta give up all of lifes pleasures to become enlightened. MAKES. NO. SENSE. Therefore, is a teacher can't even distinguish the hypocrasy in that, how can you trust them at all?

@Danioover9000 Glad you found it interesting. I don’t see exactly how the video relates to this thread or if it’s meant to, but sure. I didn’t listen to the whole thing, they covered a lot subjects in a short time so I don’t have the full context for the conversation but I can comment on some things I heard them talk about in the first third of the video. He was talking about these spiritual communities and satsangs and I agree with some of his criticism as I have seen it in person myself. I’m not really that interested in these spiritual communities anymore, if it’s zen, buddhism, nonduality or whatever. Besides other problems, like abuses from the guru that might occur in some cases, from my own observation people usually stop thinking for themselves once they have found a group they connect with and have someone with a certain vibe they like, telling them what to think. Not that some aspects of it couldn’t be valuable and very much could help people, it’s just not how I roll. I’ll share a personal example. Some years ago I went to a Rupert Spira retreat in the Netherlands and I met another swede there who was also into nonduality, so when we both were back in Sweden again we continued to meet and talk about this stuff but after awhile it became clear to me that he was mostly re-iterating stuff that I’ve heard Rupert say a million times, but in swedish. To the point that I could take some typical Rupert phrase and put it in a translator and that word for word translation would be something he could say or write to me. He didn’t even have his own words to describe it, just being a parrot. At the same time he didn’t really want to engage in discussing things seriously while also becoming more smug about the whole thing. I called bullshit and haven’t seen him since. It’s easy to repeat words and play with semantics but if they don’t lead to an actual tangible re-contextualization then it’s not really that interesting. The guy in the video also talked a bit about his own experience of first reaching a conceptual understanding before a direct experience and yeah, I definitely think there is a difference between understanding something through logic or conclusions rather than a direct experience but I wouldn’t say there is a need to pick a side and dismissing the other, both have importance in my opinion. Some of us are more conceptual and like to play along with concepts and some of us don’t. It’s interesting when you do both. I’ve experienced some spiritual people using shame tactics against me when I’m using logical reasoning. And then when I go and talk to my normie buddies they call it all woo and says it all goes against science lol. Quite a predicament to be in. I think it also depends on where you are on the spiral dynamics scale and that we can’t exclude psychology from this. This might tie back to the criticism of the spiritual communities. I think some people who are in the pre-rational stage of cognitive development might hear spiritual concepts and because their mind doesn’t feel like it needs evidence for anything they rely on gut feeling or the vibe of the guru that’s telling them stuff and might just ”accept” spiritual concepts right away without even digging or thinking for themselves. And then to strengthen their newly formed belief-system that haven’t really been validated in direct experience they instead group together to feel more right about their self-perceived to be superior spiritual ideology and perhaps even demonize some other group. I mean, that sums up a lot of religion. And then the rational people instead misunderstands what it’s all about and lumps it all together with those religions and people who are in that pre-rational stage. For me growing up in a highly secularized community with atheistic, or at most agnostic, parents and being mostly stage green my primary challenge has been to overcome skeptical arguments that came up as I was having experiences I couldn’t explain. So I tried to make sense of it from my materialistic worldview, which I couldn’t really. Stuff like psychedelics really doesn’t make sense under the materialistic paradigm, the explanations given very fast becomes incoherent, which was the point of discussing the AI, to see how it would react when it's shown its incoherencies. So I don't see it as constructing something new, rather a discovery that what was thought of as reality is something constructed. If there is a model that I’m deconstructing the deconstructing of it isn't itself more construction, unless I make it so. It depends on what’s left after the deconstructing business is done. Maybe I’m making it into something else, very possible so gotta watch out always. It would be similar to those who make a big deal out of being skeptics. Being skeptical and viewed as being skeptical becomes more important itself than using skepticism as a tool in the pursuit of truth so they in many cases cynically just dismiss things which could be true because their identity is tied to looking like a skeptic, which also in mainstream society is associated with intelligence so they are trying to remain on their high horses. I see it with a lot of scientists and public intellectuals right now with this whole UFO thing going on lol Anyway, sorry to ramble on but that’s my thoughts so far.

I'm curious if all concepts of dualism can be attributed to Nonduality? In any sense of the word. I also feel like certain occult mysticism that talks about the dual nature of things infers to Nonduality, but tries to stick to it's nature of not speaking for it.

I remember feeling this way when attending youth group in high school. I was, admittedly, an undercover Buddhist at the time. I even joined in their nondenominational worship group, as the backup singer and lead guitarist. That was very cringe. Those Protestant Christian songs suck. Hopefully I'll sing in this Gregorian Chant choir soon. Here's a thought experiment. Does "Domine" as the Latin form, or even "Deo" make you equally cringe? If it doesn't, possibly consider that the word associations constructed out of this upbringing of yours has tainted the sounds and utterances of your life. I remember, more recently, attending different Latin Masses and finding some priests whine the Latin Mass in an uncomforting timbre. I also remember a distinct LSD experience where I felt the "nonduality talk" as equally cringe. Nowadays, I still get nauseated at the vocal phrase "we are one" because it invites a deep level of psychological ingratiation in social situations. If I say it to somebody walking down the street, I will feel the cursed detriment of the Most High God. Too "on the nose" perhaps. Yet, I don't find such cringe when saying "we are one in Christ." Might a spiritual-but-not-religious identity make you cringe, or is it more a deep piety that causes ick? In other words, do you think it may have to do with an unsubstantiated understanding of God? Or, rather a deeply conformed knowledge?

right. nonduality doesn't fit with experience, it's just a fancy theory. everything is the same substance, but there's an infinity of minds. widowless monads - Leibniz

Beautiful! IT (what you describe, bold markings by me) is always right here, and can not be gone. Just temporarily clouded with containing/giving arising to the illusion-arisings of the self-contraction (certain I-thoughts and I-feelings). One can do perfectly fine without them, because most of them are just suffering. I am happy for you that you had this Awakening, insight and experience. That is a wonderful "place" to live ones life from. Water by the River PS: Just some further musings, not specifically intented as answer for you/your post, but also for others that maybe are a bit put off (or just dont really know what I mean by that) by my frequent mentioning of the Impersonal/Nonpersonal [or empty] Nature of Reality/Pure Primary Consciousness/Infinite Consciousness. I certainly would have been a few years ago. [IT/Infinite Reality (what you describe, bold markings by me) is always right here, and can not be gone. Just temporarily clouded with containing/giving arising to the illusion-arisings of the self-contraction (certain I-thoughts and I-feelings). One can do perfectly fine without them, because most of them are just suffering.] Yet, after waking up, the personal individuality/soul stays, though no longer being a separate-self, but an enlightened being in nondual unity with existence itself. Impersonal or non-personal is not bad at all (although it can sound scary in the beginning), but on the opposite: It allows for the full expression of ones individuality or soul-qualities, that now can finally flourish in nonduality, and are no in a contracted separate-ness, hampeing its flow and expression with suffering and other not so nice experiences. But instead expressing itself fully in the Infinite Existence/Reality that one really is then, containing in this perspective (of Indras Net/Reality itself) this individual soul and its expressions. It is like: Unenlightened Being/perspective = Absolute Reality + Individuality/soul + and separate-self arisings cutting Nonduality/Reality into two, creating suffering and/or boredom. Enlightened Being/perspective (or better woken up perspective in Indras Net, since the separate being has been transcended and replaced with Infinite Reality itself) = Absolute Reality + Individuality/soul (each perspective/being is different, have different traits and capacities and inclinations, even enlightened ones) + and no more separate-self arisings cutting Nonduality/Reality into two, but instead True Identity= Impersonal/Nonpersonal Infinite Reality + containing (transcended and intergrated) Individuality/soul, evolving further in this non-contracted state of being. Enlightenment is not the final end of the caterpillar-being (only of certain aspects of it (clouding mechanisms, separate-self-illusions), preventing it from being a butterfly), but just the beginning of the unique butterfly and its path, this life and the next...

Thanks for describing your experience. I do agree with that, based on my own experience. And thousands of others in all cultures and centuries described it like you do. That is a very important element of the path. It probably sounds quite a bit nuts, boring and strange. At least I would have interpreted it like that a few years ago... But that is exactly how the Impersonal (Silent/Pure/Empty) Infinite Consciousness perceives all of its manifestation in certain awakened nondual states, watching itself, perceiving itself, being itself and the world, by itself, for itself. (1) That starts to happen when the self-contraction/separate-self is seen through, transcended and cut off either with high enough speed & proficiency, or with some more energetic state-change techniques. So the resulting flow of bliss makes it no longer possible for any grasping/contracting thought/feeling-arising to grip & contract the focus/attention (and cut the nondual field into two, or duality), and create bad emotions/stop the flow of bliss. And motivating the separate-self with that resulting suffering again for searching or avoiding certain experiences to eradicate the suffering, and relax the contraction again. That process you describe is the natural way that leads the transition to the deep identity level change to ones True Nature, the Infinite Silent and peaceful/blissful Abyss of Pure Consciousness without location or any kind of objective appearance... When not finding IT (or Consciousness, or oneself), at some point the localization of consciousness dissolves, making every appearance (thought, feeling, cloud, tree, the whole world including ones "small self") just an appearance arising in the Infinite, silent & empty and not-personal Eternal Reality of Ones True Being, Infinite Consciousness, or Reality itself. (2) And when it is seen that even the "Understander" of this Nondual and Awake Realization is nothing more than a bundle of "understanding"-thoughts arising WITHIN THAT, then Full Enlightenment is finally seeing that there never was a separate-self besides an illusion, and nobody (besides) an Illusion actually woke up. Pure Infinite Consciousness/Being was there throughout, undisturbed, just containing some illusion-arisings. And yet, that Realization or waking up of that perspective of Indras Net makes all the difference in the dream of that perspective, finally dissolving the self-contraction/separate-self illusion even of the "Understander" of all of that for good. Selling Water by the River PS: (1) are the stages of dissolving the separate-self into nonduality, and (2) is going from Nonduality/Unity towards even relaxing/dissolving the "Understander"-separate-self-illusion of that into Infinite Consciousness/Reality itself. More on that in this post: PS PS: For Infinite Reality to create a separate-self/self-contraction/ego and to maintain it, there are just two emotions needed that have to regularly occur in cycles (not permanently, that would also kill the separate-self) : 1) suffering (in the meaning of non-satisfied-ness, or "non-bliss" , and 2) boredom. That starts all of the projects for getting back again the bliss via certain experiences (whatever that may be varies a lot). A bliss that would be there if not the separate-self-contraction would stop its flow via contracting. Of course, that can only be seen after having touched the natural bliss of ones True Being, because if that would be seen earlier the whole process would be shut off immediately. But if there is no technique available to just cut off the contraction/suffering, one has to stick to grasping for certain experiences, because that is then all one has...