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I’ve been realizing that I have spent my entire self-help “career” taking on others’ teachings blindly. My parents have always kinda been into this sort of stuff and I just took it on without thinking twice about it. Im at a sort of cross roads now, actually. Realizing this recently, I’m second guessing if I even want to be doing this work, as I’m suffering so much and I’m tired of not fitting in and everything is just horrible. I guess in a way I feel I’ve seen too much, and now there’s no going back. But I’ve been having inkings that maybe I do want to give up, and live a normal life, no more of this seeking. Ignorance is bliss, I guess.

Trauma, experience; event unfolds, that I am; not stories I’ve told. I must be that - this surely is this, I weave that hat; ‘right’ of the bliss. Never once more, never such pain, unbreakable vow; again and again. World full of fools, heads in the clouds, lucky, unscathed; fortunate clowns. Yet that feeling - it won’t seem to let go, this here will numb it, this much I know! That feeling is gone; safe - it is best, fall into line; sleep like the rest. Why do you hurt me, why persist? Notions of grandeur, of slitting of wrists. I can not take it, that feeling is wrong! Drowning as birds, choking on song. I’ll build my castle, no entry you’ll see, send every monster, witch, demon, & being. None shall enter, none penetrate, and I will be happy; and I will be great. Built ever sturdy, concrete and bricks, high above mountains, my heaven exists. King of my kingdom, I need not a one, nothing can touch me; thus - I have won. Yet, ever so sweetly, a breeze between trees, whispers profusely, my love and my dreams. Wind of a stranger, yet one that is known, my castle it crumbles, like sand it is blown. Again is this feeling, I can not escape! It’s power my healing; it’s strength is my gate. Within every meaning; it’s kindness my fate, ever revealing; this love was my hate.

When the ego bound me is all alone that is loneliness. When the infinite I am all alone that is pure Bliss.

@MusicalPotato Assuming that I am infinite everything and nothing, I should be able to identify with what I choose or with nothing. If I won't identify with let's say love or bliss or well being or peace or rest as nothing, then why would I identify as loneliness or despair or powerlessness. Is it easier to identify as lonely than as whole, complete love? Am I pure love that knows no loneliness or am I bound to seek love? What other is loneliness than a desire for more love Why must I seek love instead of being it? What keeps me from being it?

There are times when power flows through you strongly. They are judged by the mind as either intense joy, bliss states or intense pain, depression or anger. The mind perpetuates the state but if you can surrender right there (literally feels like you're going to die and you will watch the mind come up with all kinds of objections), take a belly breath, go into the body and feel the energy as just that, energy, something amazing happens. It's a kind of alchemy. Suffering is an opportunity, but it's always a missed opportunity because as soon as you take it it's not suffering anymore.

I mean almost everyone here seems to appreciate hardcore spirituality no matter the cost, of course you could say this is a naive way of thinking or that I should take things seriously, but let's not jump to conclusions here. We've all heard Eckhart Tolle's awakening story and how he had to go through years of excruciating suffering in order to finally awaken right before he kills himself, most of us would agree that that level of suffering is unnecessary awaken (and consequently live in bliss). So I was thinking what if the same applies to current hardcore spiritual paths? That the inevitable suffering that you have to go through in that path, is not really necessary. I think I have heard something similar in one of Matt Kahn's videos, that there is the hellish path and the heavenly path to awakening. Now if you're like me and you appreciate this limited time you have here as a limited human form and want to make the best of it, then you value living your life to the fullest and being the happiest you can be. After all you're gonna die one day and probably totally awaken, so there's no rush. Many of you here have had awakenings and great spiritual progress, each following their own path, if you know of a possibility of an alternative way I would like to hear abt it

I use this as well, since I don't really have any mobility to do the half lotus. I have a question: can different people have their chakras in different locations ? In most of the books and videos about chakra locations they depict the solar plexus chakra as being in the level of the navel but I feel that mine is way above the navel, as in for the sacral I still can't locate it cause i keep trying to feel at the base of my spine but I feel nothing there. Also do any of you know of any practices that will improve mental pranayama (enjoying the bliss of feeling into each chakra), it's the part of kriya that I used to enjoy the most when I first started but now it doesn't feel like it used to, as in I can't reallyyy feel into the chakras anymore

Ignorance is bliss

@Harikrishnan the way i see it. There are degrees of realization... To him. His was such a total annihilation that initially he did not take care of his body and it was rotting as he sat in bliss. The larger dream always unfolds on it's own... He had let go totally, not even Caring about what happens or not. So his cancer was just what happened... He maybe could have gotten treatment for it as the primary concern and it would have been likely healed fully. Anyhow, one can be Enlightened and still care how their haircut looks and one can also not care about their haircut.

Hello there fellow seekers of the Absolute. Sorry for the click-bait guys, but there is no shortcut to absolute truth . Instead of giving you false perceptions I will be giving a summary of my journey to absolute truth, not for approval, but to help making you more aware of the false reality you are living in due to lower consciousness. Along the way I will hopefully be triggering your subconscious soul-memory. So DO NOT dismiss or judge this story, for the Source/God has given each and everyone of us life to seek the absolute truth and when found to live and expand this greater understanding onto the seekers. Of course this knowledge cannot be understood by the believer through words or concepts, (it can only be communicated and understood by the knowers, because only they will find the deeper understanding/meaning behind the words or concepts) let alone through a thread on a forum. That's why you have to seek yourself and if you truly, from the depths of your existence, SEEK for absolute truth and intensely want it, that's when you will arrive at your (next) truth (keep in mind truth can change, not the absolute, but rather your truth). That is how the Light will eventually sprout inside of you by experience and sensation, it is not something you can link together like connecting the dots. (Seek and you shall find). So If you wish to trigger this absolute truth unto yourself I advise you not to fast forward scroll through this thread, but rather to read everything with intend. I also tend to share some more personal things to help give you an understanding about the individual (me). My personal self Up until the 19th year of my life, It wasn't really great, I had a hard chilhood and had to leave the house with no contact when I was 16. I started facing the world alone without having any Idea where I was headed or where I would stay, standing with my back against the wall trying to survive day to day. Also I did what I wanted to do because I was living my own life, when I reached rock bottom at 19 I started smoking weed (Funny since I always told myself that I wouldn't ). That is when I truly started to know my worldy self, also my personal horizon on everything expanded greatly. This was an uplift to my emotions and my life overall. I came from a spiritual family with a spiritual mother and aunt that had a bond that even twins can't connect like. Also, they were so far ahead of me spiritually, my worldy self couldn't even comprehend the deeper understanding behind their doings/sayings, and just thought of them as my slightly strange but o so loving and giving family (Oh how I was the strange one in the end). My aunt was like a mother to me, that taught me things my actual mother didn't or couldn't, but she passed away a couple of years ago due to lung cancer, this was a fallback for me with lots of emotions up until my Awakening. The start of the journey This journey began in approximately 2017 when my muslim friend Adam who I met in elementary school came to me with tears in his eyes (we're both 25 now and stayed friends) and said that he had a vivid dream about us and everyone standing at judgement day. He saw me getting taken into Hell while he was going to Heaven (probably because he still lived at home with dinner being served every day and living according to his religion). He also cried in the dream because there was nothing he could do to help me. Keep in mind my friend grew up in a muslim household and everything other than that what he believes in is complete false, simply because Islam is 'the truth'. I don't even judge him now because we've all hold false perceptions of reality at first, I didn't even believe in the Source/God and was a total Atheist, who used logic and science for truth. He practically begged me to learn about Islam because he believed it was a sign from 'Allah'. However, back then I didn't know much about the details of this religion, but he showed me some things in this book and compared it to science, which seemed pretty convincing and made me think, but I still didn't believe there was a God. So there is a God ? This was until I started scientifically looking for mistakes in the evolution theory and I found out how complicated our DNA actually is. This can't just come from nothing. But the biggest switch was when I learned about the formula that came into existence when the Big Bang happened called 1.618, better known as the Golden Ratio or the Spiral of life. I thought if I take apart my phone and throw it into the cosmos we could wait a million years, but it would never be a complete phone in the end. Or I could smash my keyboard for a bazillion years and in the end I wouldn't all of a sudden get a quantum code designed to create new universes or something, so basically you could say that I found out life doesn't just happen to be. This was a definite eye opener that there was indeed an intelligent designer behind our existence. So I began to inquire into Islam, because if this was the truth I wanted it! But if it wasn't then I wanted to save my friend from this false perception! At first they show you all these 'miracles' of the Q'uran that are so convincing, because you are still thinking in concepts and words to comprehend this so called 'truth'. Soon I found out how this cult actually worked and how these so called 'scholars' of Islam are changing words in the translations of the Q'uran/Hadiths in the benefit of Islam. Then I found out (as they (muslims) all say) you can only really understand this book if you read it in the original Arabic language, but my friend didn't even know how to read Arabic. I looked for someone who could help me with translations and it turned out to be even worse than I thought (not going into further details because this truth doesn't even matter). This couldn't be the word of God, this couldn't be Absolute truth, I refused to accept this tyranny, never the less Adam asked me to come to the musk one time just for the experience, so I went. There I found their Imam totally working on the emotions of these people, on the fears and desires (otherworldy desires), He told us to fear Allah! He said to be scared of Allah, how Allah would punish you if you didn't live according to the Q'uran or the Prophet, this went on for about 20 minutes. Before I decided to come with Adam to the musk I found a giant scientific mistake in their scripture. I decided to confront him with it after the gathering ended, to see what his reaction would be. After I showed the imam the error in their scriptures, they were all looking flabbergasted as if they had never heard about this before. After 45 minutes of the Imam browsing through their scriptures, he came to the conclusion that this wasn't a mistake,. It was just me who was an idiot basically and didn't understand their scriptures. That's when I was sure.. These were NOT the scriptures of the Divine. Of course Adam also refused to see this as a mistake, but I knew that it was a done deal for me, even though he still tried to make me see his truth. Emptiness So there I was, knowing evolution wasn't the answer and religions weren't the answer. I was aware that I knew exactly nothing of our existence, the things I was so sure of most likely weren't true as well. I deeply asked myself these questions over and over again, why are we here ? Were we just born to die ? What happens after 'death'? After a month of being pointblank and still seeking for Absolute truth, I came across a book called The Universal One by Walter Russel (http://educate-yourself.org/cn/TheUniversalOne1926WalterRussell.pdf) If you haven't awakened yet, or even if you have, I advise you to read this book even if it takes you 2 days to understand 1 page. This book is full of true knowledge about our universe and will benefit YOU, the reader, greatly. Of course you don't have to believe me! Just open the book and look for yourself. With some of this knowledge inside my head and actually starting over with everything I thought was truth I had some sort of a different view of the world. I still wanted Absolute truth, but I knew that I knew nothing. SPIRITUAL AWAKENING! My girlfriend was having a small party with some friends, in the end (about 5 hours later) only 2 friends of mine stayed. My girlfriend was sleeping and we smoked some blunts while talking about divinity and such. We put on some chill music, started filling balloons with Nitrous Oxide and began inhaling them (It's a thing here in the Netherlands). This wasn't the first time, so it wasn't a big deal or anything. A couple of rounds later my friend put on ASAP Rocky - L$D, as I inhaled my filled balloon again, I started to flow away further and further. I focused on my breathing and thought of nothing (unintentionally), I felt I went further away from my individual self yet I was still there in the Now. Then IT happened. It was as if my humanity got taken off layer by layer, The Ego, my Desires, My Fears, my Emotions. For once I was able to completely let go of the past and was fully in the present, It really felt like I was dying, as I was thinking that I was dying It was as if the universe downloaded data inside my head, because all of a sudden I felt and experienced (NOT HEAR) someone giving me a feeling that it's okay to let go and that reincarnation was a fact, so I would come back, Then finally all my attachments in the world were gone and I was aware that all that was left over was consciousness. THEN I REALIZED all I am IS consciousness. After that, I felt a LOVE which was so BIG and SO POWERFUL, I've never felt anything like this before in my life. This love could only be from the Source/God (what I knew the moment I felt it), and it kept on going, After this great sensation of love I was given this sense of UNITY with everyone and everything that's in this universe. I quickly became aware that I am you, you are me, I am the trees, the trees are me, we are ALL ONE. We are not in nature, we ARE nature, we are not in the universe, we ARE the universe. Then I was given the knowledge that RELIGION WAS NOT THE ANSWER INDEED and that NOTHING TRULY MATTERS EXCEPT CONSCIOUSNESS! I felt this deeply intense feeling of happiness and bliss, like I've never felt before. Soon after I came back, I stood up shocked/surprised and said "GUYS NOTHING MATTERS IN THE WORLD, ONLY CONSCIOUSNESS and leveling that truly matters" and they were looking at me all weird, I still see their faces haha . My perception of reality got changed to Absolute Truth for good! The day after, I wanted to find out what happened that caused this great but weird experience, that's when I found out it happened because the brain always needs and gets oxygen every second of the day. The Nitrous Oxide causes 'Cerebral hypoxia', this occurs when not enough oxygen can get to the brain, that gave me a Near Death Experience. So, my mind thought it was actually dying, that's when enough Dymethyltryptamine was released to cause my Spiritual Awakening. Even the day after this experience I was still feeling this insane love and empathy towards other people, also this feeling of unity just kept hanging by and the thought that all I am is consciousness. I felt I couldn't talk to anyone about this, because they would think I was crazy, but I knew there was one person who would listen without prejudice for sure, that was my mother. I called her and told her; "Mom there's something really weird that happened to me", she replied with "What happened !?", thinking something bad happened. That's when I started explaining my experience to her, when I was halfway she just stopped me and said "Really honey ? Congratulations, I'm so intensely proud of you!" SHE KNEW! SHE KNEW about Absolute Truth all along, she knew this would happen one day, and as she told me "Congratulations", all of a sudden a memory came back to me. When I was 12/13, she told me that when I was 3 years old she closed my 3rd eye, because I was bothered by entities (positive though), but I couldn't sleep because of it. Then I remembered she also said it would open when I would be 24 years old............. This awakening happened 2 months prior to my 25th year old birthday, believe it or not. I started crying because I was happy, for the first time in my life I cried because I was happy and because of everything that was changing around me. All of a sudden I didn't just care about myself, but I started to care about all beings in the world, even animals and even strangers, My whole world got filled with light and I started to feel this bliss and happiness throughout the whole day, even a week later still. Even up until now, moments of happiness and bliss come and go. I know now what my task is in this world, to become more aware live in constant awareness of Absolute truth and to help others planting seeds for their awakening. To the reader Please try to understand that the key to peace on earth is inner peace (self-realization). Be conscious and conscious about consciousness. Awaken your true self (your spiritual self) in order to obtain enlightenment. You may stop trying to fill the whole with earthly desires, because you are the one you've been searching for all along. Meaning, this eternal sense of bliss and happiness cannot be found when you reach outward, but rather reach inward. Don't look external, look internal. While I'm talking about knowledge, that is beyond this phenomenal world, please don't try to understand absolute truth through worldy/earthly concepts and words. Give up all these concepts and inquire into the nature of your being (the true self). Ask yourself the right questions: how did we all happen to be? And if you continue in the realm of intellect (trying to understand the divine through these concepts and words) you will become entangled and lost in more and more concepts. We must all give love in order to receive love, Hell is on earth and it's a state of mind that's why the world is so desperately in need of love. We must all enter into the kingdom of the one infinite source which is heaven and you enter that kingdom once you have become enlightened by the divine itself, I say this once more, the Absolute truth must stumble upon you, you cannot stumble upon it. I've added a diagram for the believers to give a deeper understanding of the surfaces of consciousness. I'm giving you all love and peace into your journeys, if anyone has any questions i'd be happy to answer them

If you want the answers to the universe you must first silence the mind. Meditation is very important and one of the most used words among spiritual and conscious communities for a reason. This will also help you be more present during experiences in life so the more present and "in the moment" you are the more you will feel, experience, enjoy things because when you are busy in mind, you miss out on the beauty, the bliss, the orgasm of life itself. Affirmations help but you have to really believe, feel, embody them to make them work properly and with a busy mind it won't be easy.

This is a sign of growth, a paradigm shift. It means you really felt deeply these existential insights and of course your ego is going to battle against these things. These raw emotional energies being released is you processing what you know and beginning to integrate it. Beyond the fear of difficult experiences like these is bliss and the next chapter of your life beginning to unfold.

@ShaunDuring some awakenings - for me - there was a window after awakening or a non-dual state in which i lingered between perspectives. Between your Egos perspective and the universal or God's perspective. I drifted between a non-dual state and duality for a few days because consciousness was elevated through the roof. It did feel like i was going insane for a while. I had to really work to focus on something of form because i would still be between states and defaulting to a formless or non-dual state. (Which was complete bliss) So for me there was a window or period of time like this. Also following days of total bliss there was some depression. The ego has died and was reborn so to speak so there is some backlash. Mysticism is serious business. But i will say that it completely passes. At least for me. Consciousness returns to a human level after a time. That time may be different for everyone. I wouldn't trade being awake for anything. Some people may not experience these things at all i can only speak from direct experience.

@Maximus Sounds like kundalini arousal. Bliss states come and go, it’s best not to be attached to them. Some people are determined (meaning, you can’t avoid it) to experience the darkness at certain points in their journey. This is completely normal, don’t be afraid of it. However, the light will return when you continue to meditate and seek higher truths. When it does, you realize it had been there all along, you just couldn’t detect it.

This is what I am going through at the moment. But fuck what they think, they like to indulge in the shallower aspects of life. They don't care about depth, they care about fitting in and surviving. That is perfectly fine. Each to their own. You do you, enjoy what you do, let the passion of life flow through you. Follow your bliss, my passions are spirituality and wildlife medicine, I have other hobbies but generally, my focus' are limited. I have this as a grounding and in generall it allows me to connect with people more. Every person has a unique story to tell, be interested in what they have to say. You don't have to dismay other perspectives because yours is so different. Also, surround yourself by people who have similar values, this means you don't feel like the odd one out. Sometimes you can feel very isolated when you only interact with people as stage orange or below in spiral dynamics. Find people who are at your level and above so you have some ideal to work towards and that can guide you. Maybe get a new girlfriend/friends

So I've been meditating very consistently for the past two months and a half. An hour every single day, mostly alternating between focusing on my breath and "Do Nothing". Some really strange things have started to happen, and although I think they're good, it's kind of confusing. These are the changes I've been noticing: No sex drive whatsoever: I used to be addicted to fapping, all I would think about was sex. I used to masturbate around twice a day on average. Since at least the past month and a half, I have had no sexual cravings whatsoever, I don't feel motivated at all to pursue sex, and the times I have masturbated (like 3 times in the past 50 days) have been merely to "remember" how it felt, and it felt kind of forced to do it when I didn't feel like it... I know it sounds really weird. I've started noticing how messed up the people whose attention and validation I so much craved before really are. I used to be so invested into going out, hanging out with "cool people", meeting girls and hooking up, etc. Now I see how screwed up and unhappy many of those people are behind the shining facade of superficial happiness. I still care about my appearance and how other people perceive me, but my concern for this has decreased very noticeably. This point relates to unhappiness more broadly. I have come to look at the world through this very bleak outlook. Noticing how unsatisfied and miserable people are in every facet of life. Disconnected from their jobs and what they do, unable to sustain even unconscious relationships, living paycheck to paycheck, needing someone to "complete them", being carried away by advertisements, meaningless fads, and trivial trends like a leaf in the wind, having corporations dictate their interests (e.g. "OMG did you look at the new Iphone?!" "Did you watch the new movie that came out? It was awesome!") etc... Feeling at times so inspired by life that tears are almost dripping down my face, and also, at other times, hopeless at the utter meaningless of existence. As arrogant as this may sound, I say it with complete honesty- I've just started noticing how low the lowest common denominator really is. How mediocre the average person is, how much failure is the norm. And deep inside myself, I've noticed a fear of becoming this way, and a growing negative motivation to work hard to not end up divorced, overweight, with an alienating job, etc. Feeling very lonely, like no one really gets me or shares my vision for life. Things that haven't changed My Neuroticism has pretty much remained the same. Although I have episodes of satisfying emotional stillness and bliss more frequently, I am still pretty anxious and stressed a lot of the time, and I still get triggered by pretty much the same things. I haven't lost ambition in the least. It just seems to be that the objects towards which I channel my ambition have changed. I contemplate with more frequency the impact I want to have on the world, unprecedented and extended discipline in fitness and nutrition, contemplation on my life purpose, etc. So my question is, are these things normal? Are these feelings and shifts of attitudes a sign that Im on the right path, or mere delusions and rationalizations?

When I merge with reality it feels SO fucking weird. To literally not be a human. The confusion was what worried me at the start, always trying to make sense of things, work it out, understand it. I'm only now starting to see with authentic seeing, that I am what witnesses confusion and clarity. I am that which witnesses the mind and thoughts. It's such a bizarre sensation, it feels like I get pulled out of my body and warped into what I'm looking at. I become Everything. For the first time ever today I felt my suffering release for about an hour and I entered into bliss it was after I heard a girl singing beautifully. Then i felt like all floaty and stuff and heard the word "awaken" in my mind. So coooooooooollllll haha

I attended an Ayahuasca ceremony last weekend, which was my second time drinking Ayahuasca tea. It was a religious ceremony so there was some chanting and question/answers periods, but I was so totally absorbed in my trip that I wasn’t able to pay attention to any of those. This trip was a TOTAL MIND FUCK. I was so mind-fucked I do not even know where to begin, or how to put anything in words. I remember during the peak of the trip, I kept repeating in my head: what was seen cannot be unseen, and ignorance is bliss. I had a bad trip last April during which I was sent to the hospital. In that trip, I was not sure whether I was alive or not. I felt that I was everyone and anyone at the same time. It took me months to overcome that bad trip. The reason that I am mentioning that is because as I began to feel the effect of the tea, it connected right with the last trip. The two trips merged and became one. It made so much sense how it connected and how this is the obvious path down the road. I felt stuck in this loop, the loop of trying to pursue the truth. I was then hit with the feeling that EVERYTHING MAKES SENSE. I cannot even tell you what made sense exactly, but I just kept repeating of course, of course.. But of course… of course I drank the tea to experience this, of course I had the bad trip, of course! I understood everything, EVERYTHING. Or so it felt. I understood what Leo has been saying all along. I understood every awakened trip reports I have read. I felt the circular nature of life. I realized that I HAVE NEVER lived. The realizing felt SO REAL, so convincing and life as I knew felt like a joke. I thought of my boyfriend and my parents and how they did not really exist. There really is only me. I saw it SO CLEAR that I can only repeat: but why, what ? Why? How? Ok but why? I wished I did not know. I wished that I did not take that tea. I also felt clairvoyant. I knew I wouldn’t believe what I experienced once I "come back" and I would be posting on the forum and asking questions but the answers seemed so obvious to me at the moment. And I knew there was NO WAY to explain this to anyone. That’s what I have been doing all my life, and that’s what ill keep doing, and that’s what everyone will keep doing, one way or another : pursue the truth. Once I was "convinced" that It has been me all along and all will merge with truth eventually, I saw life as no point. I felt that there was no point in doing anything at all. Nothing matters in this game called life, it literally , truthfully did not matter. Theres no point in asking any questions because I have all the answers in that moment, no point in judging, no point in hating or helping. The comedown was surprisingly smooth. However, I had this intense burn/hot/warm/energetic sensation in the perineum that was slightly uncomfortable. As expected, as the trip subsided, my life felt more real than that "experience". I only remember how convincing those realizations were, but they did not stick, and I am already doubting if that was just a dream. I did not feel being one with the universe or awakened. I think I was mindfucked more than anything. My main questionning is: how do I know if those realizations are absolute truth (as they undoubtingly were during the trip) or another belief/idea? Because it seems like they are highly influenced by what I have been fed such as "this is all imaginary" or "life is a loop" or "I never lived".. How come they felt SO REAL , and now I can barely remember it? any other pointers for me ? Thank you all for your help.

So, I woke up with INTENSE energy in my brain and restlessness - racing thoughts Ran, took a nap and almost fainted in my dream and then woke up in complete access concentration. Yet when I took a walk and everything was HD I was contemplating what is God or what is Truth and I get nowhere. Also, I get kind of attached to the bliss of no thinking and dont want to do thinking contemplation. Is there a way to reach absolute by just no thought and not doing self-inquiry? It takes away the peace and feels like I am just thinking more Now that I crashed from the peace, great suffering came and I just don't know how to discover that PERMAMENT joy in between the two states of joy and depression. Help, please

@Mo Grand If ignorance is bliss then to each his own.

@Michael Paul I didn't read your thread last night as I was too distressed, but I read it just now and it gave some perspective. I followed the link you gave to lovebliss.eu/kundalini and what I read there makes me think the energy was absorbed at a blockage at the 3rd knot at the base of the skull. While the energy was very intense, I didn't feel orgasmic bliss, more like a trance-like disorientation similar to a fainting feeling but with a metaphysical flavor to it. My heart has really begun to open this year, so the kundalini seems to have had little trouble passing up through the heart towards the brain. When this happened, I was holding on for dear life. You asked if I feel kundalini awakening symptoms in the head now and the answer is no. At worst, there is a slight dull pressure left over at the base of my skull/highest vertebra and a slight ringing in my ears (maybe just tinitus, but the ringing became very intense during the 2 waves of my experience last night.) I'll take my foot off the gas completely for a while to integrate the experience and find stability again. Thanks so much for reaching out, I'll send you a DM if something serious happens regarding all this. @khalifa Hey man, thanks for your kind words and describing your experience. You're right, I'm going to do my best to not worry. No matter what happens, it helps to know that "This too shall pass." Just like you suggested, I decided to spend time over the next few days grounding myself by connecting to the people and things that I love and that make me feel like who I am. Good luck on your path, you got this! @cetus56 Thanks, this is sage advice. Sometimes, any amount of a thing is too much and that may be where I am for now. But I'm going to be more gentle with the work going forward, and I'm looking forward to shorter daily meditations as the first thing that I pick up when I feel I'm ready again. Hopefully that will be soon. @Red-White-Light As it turns out, Kundalini works just like the jukebox in Happy Days. All it needs is a good hard slap to get going! Thanks again everyone, this was quite the challenging experience and I'm so grateful for everyone's assistance.

The Many Facets Of Awakening - List of Top 30 Enlightenment Insights //posted from youtube comments List 4:44 Mystical Experience - Not enlightenment - Its a state of consciousness -feeling that all is One 6:16 No Self - No such thing as body - Deep Insight - Distinct from Mystical - Can be combined 8:10 I AM - Deepest Truth, The Self - A deep feeling of I AM - Universe 11:40 OMnipresent - You are everything everywhere - Not located anywhere 13:13 Realizing what consciousness is - Real Consciousness - Experience required - It's everything - No external reality 14:35 Realizing what is awakening - it's not WOKE AF - Life is a Dream - Shatters reality - Satori 17:00 Oneness or non-duality -Everything is truly One - You don't understand what Oneness really mean - Literally All One 19:00 Everything is Relative - Taco and human is the same 19:35- Realizing what is Truth, Truth with capital T - Truth and consciousness is One - You know what Truth really means - You have to awaken first 20:40 Realizing what is the Absolute - To be Absolute - 99.999 of people have no reference for it - True under all events - You have to awaken first 21:40 Absolute Infinity - Not a number - Actual Infinity - Everything is absolute infinity - No end to it 23:57 Absolute Nothingness - Nothing ever happened - Identical to infinity - You can experience both or separate 24:25 - Knowing why is there something rather than nothing 25:55 Knowing what is God - What God is pointing to - 99.999 No idea what it means - Godhead 27:15 Realizing You are God - God is You - Very important - You are the creator - May take multiple awakening to achieve this 29:52 Self= Other Other= Self -It's just your imagination - You as God are all alone - Come face to face that there's no one but You - Very shocking - You might feel your insane - Everything you do is with yourself 32:54 Realizing what is Love - Emotional Insight - Consciousness is Love - Love is the fabric of the Universe - All Evil is Love - You spend most of your life hating people fighting evil - A bitter pill for ego - Truth and Love are identical 35:50 Realizing everything is imaginary - Everything is Mind - Infinite Mind - It's your Mind - It's all imaginary 38:40 Self-Design - You are creating yourself - Every hair is as though I planted it myself with Infinite Mind - You designed the Universe 40:50 Realizing what your birth really is - You were here forever - You never were born - You imagined you were born 42:45 Eternity / No-Time / Absolute Now - No past or future - Everything is in the Now - Eternal is outside of time - Even your body is eternal 44:23 Realization of what is Death and Immortality - There is no past or future - Death is imaginary, a story, and ego created. - You're immortal 46:25 Paradise / Heaven / Perfection - Heaven is right here - Heaven and Hell are not physical locations - When you realize your immortal you'll be in heaven 48:00 Bliss / Ecstasy - Not just extreme pleasure - It's infinitely good - Cosmic orgasm 49:33 Infinite intelligence - It's not high IQ Its Being -Everything is intelligence - Its all the Mind of God 53:32 Goodness - Everything is Absolute Good 54:35 Realizing what is Will (Infinite Will of God) - Everything is though the Will of God - Manifests everything Now - Not mechanical - The human will is a tiny sliver of Gods Will 56:47 Unlimited Power - Create whatever no Laws - Human is God in a limited form 58:13 Omniscience - Incredible experience 59:20 Divinity / Magic / Mystery - The human experience is divinity - You walk down the street an everything glows at you - A deep and profound mystery - You don't know anything 1:01:00 Realizing what is Being - Substance of reality 1:02:15 Realizing Universe is an Infinite Fractal - You can zoom in and out 1:02:44 Realizing what is Perception - Infinite resolution 1:03:18 Realizing what is Life - Universe is Alive - Any form is alive 1:04:32 Realizing the point of Existence. - Love Bonus: 1:05:30 Communicating with God 1:06:07 Healing 1:06:46 Collective Consciousness 1:07:15 Universe Collapse 1:07:46 Paranormal 1:08:22 Alien Entities

@LaucherJunge meditative, third person perspective state is a key easy to say, but you can train that - just start to ignore emotions that you don't like to experience and follow the ones you do like and consciously decide that you want to go after and experience these if you feel like getting hurt - just take a break, don't tell her that, it's a sign that you are pushing too much, your emotions are like a feedback mechanism from Universe, you should always follow love, bliss and joy give yourself some time with getting more into "feeling" what to do and going with the flow, push-pull energy dynamic in relationship and after some time and training you will perfect your game and it will just become natural to you

@lukej Great post thank you. You've described very well the perils of this path, but also the beauty and bliss that comes from shedding layers of ego and psyche. Some teachers like Rupert Spira & Shinzen Young are also very good guides for when things get tough. For those alone times I think it's really important to reach out to others, particularly at retreats, workshops or meditation centres. This is why it is key to look to the community, not just online, for support.

Yeah it is better than a heroin high so it is said.. (I have not done heroin but i have felt the bliss of Pure Being and it is awesome. You can feel it fill your entire body and also when it leaves. @Nahm maybe the term Kundalini is a write off - but the phenomena is real - i call it Being.