Search the Community

When I started experiencing bliss states out on runs by fields of flowers, the only expression that came to mind was "FUCK!" over and over. You bewilder us with your grace. All evils transform into goodness. You are the master alchemist. You light the fire of love in earth and sky in heart and soul of every being. Through your love existence and nonexistence merge. All opposites unite. All that is profane becomes sacred again. -Rumi

@tsuki When I wrote the first journal I made here, I made so many assumptions about the part you took in it. The law of attraction explained why, at first it wasn't an assumption, it was a complete and total knowing of an aspect, or a blindness to everything that didn't matter from the perspective of Source. You helped me to focus, and it grew bigger and bigger until it took over. I saw through the veil, I was seeing the glimpses into how perfectly planned my past was, how perfectly it had been designed (or creatively written) to lead me to that very moment. Remember the book theme? When it ended I was back to my human perspective and even though the feeling of bliss stuck around and my reality was shattered, coming back from that state was an awkward transition because my normal thought patterns were left to make sense of it and they made a lot of assumptions without discerning. It's just like now, I can see flaws in my upbringing, I can see flaws in people and situations but I've had this experience of complete and total altered perception, and I know that I am creating the flaws through the filter of mind, and I know through focus they will cease to exist in my experience, and that my focus and experience is the creation of my reality itself. When I was writing the journal I assumed that your state of mind the entire time was the same as mine throughout and that's why everything that has happened since has been such a mind fuck. One assumption I made is that you had already had and fully understood the exact experience I was having then. I know now that neither of the realities I experience can be assumed. I am left without ground, trying to navigate a world where I must make and be ready to throw away assumptions. By the way, I'm sorry about all the assumptions and misunderstandings. Anyway, that's why it's very interesting to me that you are reading this particular book and starting with the Old Testament God the Father. Just remember who (you) wrote it and that the book is not the book. Selfish is a good thing, at least it is when it's focused and without its assumptions about others.

Why does the mood change after enhanced enlightenment? Because you are back at where you started, just screaming Oh My God in your mind. Have you noticed that your value system is changing with Actualization? So thats what will happen again, but very radically. ENLIGHTENMENT IS RADICAL. If you are caring about your mood dude... I have no words for such sloppyness.. You said: "I honestly would prefer to be a ignorant and having the bliss that Leo had in his beginnings" There is a great cost to spirituality, but Leo mentioned this a lot of times already now, so you should become aware. Ignorance and Bliss are nice for the moment but not sustainable, and if you are a true seeker, you cant stop but find. From your comment, I dont think you are, so dont worry about not being ignorant anymore

Today I watched one of my fave videos of Actualized, the one where Leo goes on a solo meditational retreat in the forest of Arizona. He appears with goods and food packed in his car before starting his new adventure. But there's one thing that catched my attention: Leo looks one of the most optimistic and happy person in the world. He looks so excited about his trip and his eyes are full of JOY. It contrasts with the post psychedellic era, where he started to wear the white shirt and full beard. After the mythical video where he became God, and the absolute infinity, he started to look sad, kinda burned out. Maybe something happened in the other side, or maybe he catched a parasite entity in the other dimension like newage woos theorise. Or maybe is the post enlightenment dowfall. What i feel that after the DMT era the "gap" between the master and the subscriber has become too big. Back in time Leo used a language and explained things the way he reassured that his public would understand everything. Today (maybe due excess of people asking him questions) his answers are like: This would take you years of practise and intricate self-inquiry to understand that (spiritual ego dismissed the questioner,its not worth to spend effort to explain things to plebs). Whats left is accept without questioning his dogmas about his new topics about politics, religion, epistemolgy, and trust Leo blindly (faith)because we cannot understand his meta stuff. Very cult-like attitude. This lack of effort to translate his spiritual epiphanies and finding about the nature of reality in "words" and he resolving the problem by saying: "This cannot be explained by language and concepts" has costed him lot of misinterpretations and critiques in internet. At least he could have tried to create metaphores like christians did to make some acute minds grasp the message behind, or conceptualize in the form of rules like the hermetic principles, or describes visually like the movie Dr Strange. The misinterpretation of Leo's revelations to plain people calling him solipsist, taking out of contexts bits of his videos, all come down due the main problem.. The GAP If I try hard to understand Leos viewpoint I can. It would take time, but I can. He cannot say: you dont exist, everything is mind... out of context. It need to be shown the contects the viewpoint, the paradigms... The correct way is to explain, contextualize, put the viewer in your viewpoint: You dont exist the way that society told you, you are not a physical body, you are not a ego, but the things is deeper because I start from the premise that everything is imaginated by a mind. Also i thing that nothing exist, all its hallucinated by a great mind. Viewer: ah I start to grasp your point, thanks for the explanation dude! Back to the topic, I dont want Leo explain us why his happy mood has changed during his spiritual path, because its his personal life. But Id like to know if this is gonna happen to us if we dive deeper to the rabbit hole. Is there a kind of toll or cost we must pay to devote out time to spiritual practise? I honestly would prefer to be a ignorant and having the bliss that Leo had in his beginnings. His positive attitude was contagious.

I've struggled with my fair share of addiction over time, maybe I can be of use. What Leo said in the video is that all addiction is ultimately caused by a lack of emotional maturity- in other words, the inability to sit by yourself, in a room, and not have neurotic compulsions. Neuroses is in essence the inability to let something go. I've found that to be true in my personal experience. The other thing which I noticed was that I simultaneously held 2 conflicting beliefs in my mind. The first belief was that I wanted to stop my compulsion. The other belief was that I found immense pleasure in my compulsion and that I wanted to do it. Can you see why that might cause problems? As long as you are attached to the desire to indulge in your compulsion- you will continue to be an addict. Notice what I said there. I didn't say, "as long as you have the desire to indulge in your compulsion- you will continue to be an addict." I said "As long as you are attached to the desire to indulge in your compulsion- you will continue to be an addict." This is a critical distinction. Our thoughts only have as much power over us as we allow them to. What you feed grows and what you starve dies. What I would recommend to you my friend is that you take up a daily meditation habit- one to two hours in the morning and 15 minutes in the evening. If you want maximum results you will go into a state of meditation immediately upon waking- before checking your phone, before eating breakfast, maybe after taking a piss. And you will meditate yourself to sleep in the evenings. This will do wonders for rewiring the neurons in your brain. You don't have to do that. Then again if you don't it's likely going to be much more difficult to break your addiction. As for the specific meditation you should partake in? Let me leave you a quick description of one that might be of use- luckily for you I just typed this out for another member of the forum on direct message a couple of hours ago. Make sure you are in an environment conducive to what you want to achieve. Turn the lights off, lay in bed, and play some light music. If you are doing this first thing in the morning- a seated meditation is ideal so you don't fall back asleep. Here is a link to the playlist which I created for my personal meditation sessions- https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLjckAW85ACTUqMtt_chUf-ksdiT1VoyP_ - I'd recommend clicking on the video titled "The new butterfly effect," that is a very peaceful tune as are the videos next up, but experiment with what speaks to you. Definitely do one of the either 417hz, 432hz, or 528hz. Butterfly is 432hz. If you are living in a shared environment, use headphones, otherwise, play the music softly. If you are having serious trouble completing this meditation, put on a pair of headphones and utilize the first video in the playlist, a theta binural beats session. Trust yourself. Stay on each part of this meditation until you feel it is proper to move on to the next part. Take your time. This is all for you. Begin by relaxing your body. Take deep breaths, in for 5 seconds, out for 5 seconds. Move your awareness to your toes, and relax them. Move your awareness the soles of your feet, and relax them. Do this for each individual part of your body, releasing all tension, all the way to the scalp. Next, move your awareness to your heart center, and start to visualize a ball of energy, it can be any color you like, spinning in a circle counterclockwise. The longer your awareness is on this ball of energy the larger it grows, until it eventually surrounds your body, and then fills the entire room. Take your time with this. Feel the gratitude provided to you from your generous heart. Realize that it wants nothing more than to see you in a state of love. As you maintain your awareness on the energy around your heart center, release any attachment you hold to your thoughts- good, bad, these are all simply labels we create in our minds. Accept, and love every thought which passes through your mind, and do so from a state of total detachment from them, without judgement. If you catch yourself getting carried away by a thought, that's okay, just bring your awareness back to your breath, to your heart, to the present moment. Now you are in the operating system of your brain- the subconscious mind. Your analytical mind should be powerless- it truly only has the power parallel to the level of attachment you hold. While keeping your awareness in the space around your heart center, cultivate gratitude. What are you grateful for? You are alive. You are breathing. Look at the beautiful mechanism by which all of this is happening. Truly you need no reason to feel gratitude. Reason is a limitation provided to you by your ego. You can simply choose to feel gratitude. Set the intention. Notice the difference between desire and intention. Feel the desire to move your arm up. Now actually move your arm up. Notice that difference? The second one was intention. Become familiar with this energy and that is what you will use to cultivate the emotions you seek. From gratitude set the clear intention to cultivate love and appreciation. From love and appreciation cultivate joy and bliss. From joy and bliss cultivate freedom and the feeling of being unlimited. Notice how I do not say try to do these things. Just do them. They exist within you right now. The next thing that you're going to do is bless your energy centers, starting with the root chakra. As you're doing this, maintain the elevated emotions you just cultivated. What emotion is your choice. Bliss, freedom, infinity, gratitude, appreciation, joy, all good choices. Begin by placing your awareness, your focus, inside of your perineum, and hold it there for as long as you please, whatever feels proper to you. Next, you will move your awareness to the space around the perineum, and, same as before, hold it there as long as you please. Both pieces of this meditation, the internal focus on the energy center and then the focus on the space around it, are essential, as is the elevated emotion. Once you have finished with your root chakra, repeat that same process for the space right below and behind your bellybutton. From there, repeat the process for the space in the pit of your gut. From there, to inside your chest, behind the center of the breastbone. Next, to the center of the throat. Next, to the space between your throat and the back of your head, inside your head of course. From there, to the space in the center of your head. And finally, to the space approximately 16 inches above your head. Now, maintain that practice for as long as you'd like. The longer you are cultivating these elevated emotions the better. Once you feel grounded in these emotions, I want you to do a breathing technique that will work wonders in tandem with that portion of the meditation, and this breath is something you can truly do any time you feel energy getting locked in the lower energy centers, and it will elevate your state of being. Your breath should still be very relaxed. To perform this breathing technique, begin by ensuring you're in a position where your spine is straight, as it most likely already is. Begin to take a long, deep breath in through your nose, to the base of your spine. When you feel your breath apply pressure to the pelvic floor, contract your perineum- maintain the contraction and inhalation. Follow your breath, and when it fills your lower abdomen, begin to contract that as well. Same thing for your upper abdomen. Now, you should have the area of your body from your perineum to upper abdomen contracted. Inhale as full as you can while maintaining those contractions, and move your awareness to the very top of your head. Hold your breath for as long as comfortable, while maintaining your contractions and awareness of the head. As you exhale, release the contractions. You can perform that breath as many times as you'd like, it should assist with the meditation session. Now, simply meditate. Remain detached from your thoughts. Maintain elevated emotions. Do this for as long as you please. The longer you do it the more grounded you will make this state of being throughout the rest of the day, especially if you begin your day with this meditation. My friend, you have the power to win this battle. But it will not be a battle won in arms or in strength- it will be a battle of peace. A test of your ability to remain calm in the face of adversity. To simply say- "you know what, I don't even have to entertain that thought!" Remain detached. You got this. I'd also recommend Leo's videos on how to overcome a victim's mentality, it could be very beneficial. Godspeed My friend, medicine and meditation are not mutually exclusive domains. Medical professionals have a multitude of flaws in their own right. And "New Age" ahhahahaahha I wish I had the laughing emoji This stuff has been taught for multiple millennia It is you who knows not of what they speak of May you find peace

The ego loves to take credit. I can look back on the portion of my journey when I first started having mystical experiences and awakenings. Many were sporadic, and inevitably the feeling was temporary. I remember experiencing bouts of depression and suffering where all I wanted to do was get back to that state of bliss. The only problem? The ego can't induce those experiences! I thought I had it all figured out- "OK, I did it once, I can do it again!" No... Because you didn't do it! The ego loves to take credit.

Its been over a month after the awaking, the extremely high level of consciousness has died down a little, but it is by choice. When you are truly free to be whatever you want, everyone has a different response. Some want to permanently stay in god consciousness, or be in a high state of being/bliss at all times. Some want to become aware of more things and deepen their understanding of god/infinite love. Some start to teach others and become a guru or sage. And everyone's path is so brilliantly unique and divinely chosen. There are infinite things to be aware of and awaken to. For me, I just want to live and be, and love. The ego or sense of separation can come back, but it doesn't matter because it is all love. It is like before awakening, you were a radio without the control over its frequency, but after awakening, you can tune the frequency to whatever you want. The whole radio becomes somewhat irrelevant because you are all the frequencies. However, suffering is still gone. Not in the sense that I can't feel pain or get hurt. But in the sense that I am the pain and the hurt. You can still experience suffering, but when you do, you are experiencing it in the perspective of infinite love, so you accept it, and thank it, and love it. Being separated is also infinite love; it is all part of the plan to maximize love. I can change my state of being at any time, but it doesn't really matter. You can experience being the ego and god at the same time, they are one. I just live with the flow of life and do whatever my intuition/infinite love tells me, and enjoy the experience of existence. The void of infinite love is always present in the background of your awareness. Feel it now, be it. I love you all.

@Gneh Onebar haha I know what you mean, but even 2-3 years was like hell to me, also didn’t help I had a B12 deficiency through part of it which added to the depression ? Youll eventually drop all the minds stories, along with the I-thought, which is at the centre of the entanglement of the mind. And, then, when you realize there’s no mind, thoughts and emotions and sensations will happen, but not to anyone as such, just in THIS, I mean it’ll feel like it’s happening to someone, but when you investigate the centre of these thoughts and emotions all that is there is Natural Pure Awareness. And, as you accept everything that arises, thoughts or emotions are no longer a problem to you, just clouds in the beautiful Sky of awareness, and guess what? Since all is The Absolute, thoughts and emotions are part of that too? @VeganAwake Exactly, no I-thought left, just THIS as it is, in all of its glory and perfection. Ignorance is bliss as a seeker, but I wouldn’t trade this in for the world if it meant going back to the old way of being Pre-Awakening, nothing can beat the spontaneous joy of being.

I will teach you how to enjoy The ways I employ: Remove you and me, That should come first, And then secondly How quenching your thirst No longer concerns you, Statement of bliss! No nothing quite so impressive as this, Then it is simple, Here's how it goes, The third part which everyone knows: Love, love, love, love, love, love ...

The big Cosmic joke is, when you reach LOC 1000 there won't even be a you left to enjoy it....lol Yay welcome to enlightenment.. are you sure...are you really sure...is this the mission you signed up for. If it happens it happens otherwise ignorance is bliss enjoy it while you have it..?

@VeganAwake you completely missed my points, Desire will continue. are you telling me you no longer have any desire in life? without it you’d be dead and if you use spirituality as a reason to not workout, eat healthy, improve your finances, develop your career etc then that that merely seems like a form of spiritual bypassing. i never once said something NEEDS to be done or be different, everything is perfect as it is. Yet, if you’re overweight, on a RELATIVE level yes you should probably go workout and eat healthier, just because you have now awakened does not change that. This is nothing to do with doing this stuff = happiness, as you said when you realise Non Duality = Duality, and the distinction is shattered you are free to play the game how you like. If you don’t want to do any of these things, nobody is saying you have to, you can just coast through life, have a simple existence and be happy, again like I said this is very dependent on the person and their personality/ enneagram type. Maybe you’re a 9, if you just want to rest in bliss/ peace forever, that is fine you do you. However, just because someone is active in the world, does not for one second mean they suddenly aren’t awakened. Rupert Spira often talked about the inner and outer understanding. Inner is pretty self explanatory, but outer is bringing your understanding of The Self into all realms of life, such as work, sex, etc. It does not mean you’re doing these things to BECOME happy, you’re simply doing them as you WANT to and for the fun of it, to EXPRESs happiness so to speak, do you get the difference? desire also evolves as I pointed out in the last post, im Not gonna go over it again. You can’t and never will stop desire, otherwise you will die, if you have zero desires you would never feed yourself, drink, go to work, meditate, do literally anything, there is a common misunderstanding of desire in spiritual communities, a lot relating back to the Buddha being falsely translated. Please don’t try and remove desire from your life, it is beautiful to express desire that comes from love and The Self, and is beautiful to experience life in all its forms. Not everything that isn’t watching Non duality videos, meditating or talking about Awakening is Ego, it’s okay to do other things, when you go full circle you realize spontaneous joy of ordinary life is absolutely beautiful.

Actually, if you believed that the suffering is imaginary, it would stop being real. Not only that, you can turn things upside down. You can believe that the suffering is a good thing, and that it will pay off in the future, and it will certainly become as you imagined. You will literally turn the suffering into bliss. You just need to truly believe. Belief is a shortcut for consciousness. That's how powerful imagination is. Imagination is a superpower. God creates through imagination.

A couple of months ago I thought about making this Journal a part of my last Will and testament. That's on the condition that I keep making a Journal entries for a good while and Actualized.org stays online in the future. A link to my Journal won't amount to very much if the electrical grids around the world collapse in the next 50 years along with a large percentage of the human population. I would rather not be on this planet if that were to happen. No electricity would leave the world full of hungry, starving, and desperate people. A recipe for violence. I had typed the above into my browser last night but didn't enter it into my journal Been reading a little more in Jana Dixon's Biology of Kundalini today. Kundalini follows its own course through the body that is specific to each person, but it is definitely not a linear path "up" the body. Except during the conjunction experiences when enormous energy pours upwards through the body with the force of a concord. Since my awakenings I am adverse to saying that the lower plexuses (charkas) or centers open prior to the higher. In my experience they all open simultaneous to varying degrees. And since the linear body is all holographically represented in the brain, and it's activity in the brain that is expressed at various regions of the body, it is hard to say what is top and what is tail. Thus kundalini moving "upwards" is a misnoma--it doesn't start out at the base of the spine and eventually "reach the brain." It is happening in the brain from the start. Even the activation of the root chakra, and the tingling in the left foot is occurring in the brain. The brain is a hologram of the body and the body is represented holographically in the brain. The body and brain are nottwo. Whatever is going on in the body is simultaneously represented in the brain and vice versa. Kundalini cycles round and round, up and down, down and up and basically all over the chakra map. For example in childhood sexual development, there probably has to be a certain level of development of the prefrontal lobes before the genitals become energetically activated. The higher in-forms the lower. So say you want to work on opening your sex center, well you don't do this directly, you work on the solar plexus-(power) and heart-(love) centers. And if you want to evolve sex even further you work on the throat-(honesty), third eye-(psychic) and crown-(integrated whole) centers. Similarly if you want to open up the crown you need to simultaneously work on freeing the pelvis. There are the fundamentals and the panultimates but it's all basically just one flow of energy. Kink the hose at any point and you interrupt the flow to all parts. We cannot divide and distinguish the difference in bodymind, subtle and causal effects because they are part of the same thing. However there are grosser autonomic body reactions such as panic states, grounding, heart expansions, heat, tingles etc...and then there are the subjective experiences such as illumination, devotion, insight, telepathy, precognition, visions, profound dreams, eurekas etc.. There are lower periods say during a die-off where voices may occur without higher-spiritual content (hallucination), and other periods where the energy is cycling much higher in which the voices have something profound to say (illumination). Kundalini flows in different episodes; sometimes panic will force exercise and breathing, sometimes bliss and grounding will force lying down. If we understand the forces at play with the various autonomic (sympathetic/parasympathetic) responses we are not confused, resistant or fearful over what is happening. With an informed perspective we know beforehand that if we are down, we are going to go up, and if we are up we are going to go down. We know how to work-with the on/off switches, to not to suppress either, but to raise the energy of each into a healthy conscious embrace of whatever is happening now. The Perspective of Whole-Seeing--The key to mastery of kundalini is that when the bliss is acute it is imperative to draw energy up the spine or otherwise we find ourselves trying to run from it and push it away. If we wimp out and try to resist the bliss and energy rather than embrace it, then this will lead to inevitable compulsivity, addiction and regression. The radical amplification of normal sensory and emotional perception and of consciousness itself will inevitably draw us into fixation with whatever part of the hyperbolic curve of experience we might be on at the time. However there is a vantage point from which Whole-Seeing is made possible. From the Mind's Eye we can view the changing phenomena of kundalini without being carried away by it. The Mind's Eye is the connective current between the brainstem and the third eye. We obtain the seat of the Mind's Eye by the felt-sense of pulling energy up the body and into this inner connection in the head. This along with deep breathing, helps to keep our experience of kundalini conscious rather than being seduced by its ecstatic fires into a narcotic sleep. I also must relate the importance of the solar plexus in keeping the balance between the two sides of the nervous system. We can prevent morbid overextension of both the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous systems by conscious breathing into the largest plexus of the body--the solar plexus. If we find ourselves in either a high or a slump, then long walks while focusing on solar plexus breathing will help to integrate and balance the energy. This continues to be important for years after an awakening as an aid to integration and establishment of the spiritual will. Otherwise we may go through the entire ordeal of an awakening for no benefit to ourselves or others and actually be worse off than we were before. The Solar Plexus responds instantaneously to the brain. Every minute contraction and expansion of the solar-center of Life is in obedience to the brain. The Solar Plexus lies exactly behind the pit of the stomach. It may be energized by practicing a "drawing in" of the abdominal muscles. Draw the abdominal muscles "inward and upward" several times at each exercise. The closest parallel in normal human experience to mystic ecstasy of kundalini activation is sex sensations. One could look at the spiral of the growth in consciousness in terms of sex energy and its use, and see the pathological, conservative, post conservative and enlightened uses of sex energy. The body is a template of our conscious-proactive-love-Self-expansion VS. our unconscious-reactive-fear-Narcissus-contraction. Looking at the body we can see where we are at in our relationship to Self and our relationship to the world, for the body doesn’t lie. From: http://biologyofkundalini.com/article.php@story=DownisUp.html

@actualizing25 Many start at that place of wanting out. Eternal bliss and all that. That has to be dropped as all other delusions.

Why is it that you think the AL LAD is friendlier at lower doses but paradoxically is more out of control in higher doses? Maybe its missing a key element that makes it seem friendlier at first (whereas with a classic one would get into uncomfortable territory) but then that same mechanism is what puts you into bliss with the classical one at higher doses?

Saw a post by @Gneh Onebar on his RASA experience so thought I'd make a thread for those out there who are still hardcore seekers, don't fancy the psychedelics path and want to work with a teacher 1-1. I started working with Ananda Devi in April after reading 1000 (from Leo's book list) last November time, I at first thought RASA was BS and overpriced, I basically became a Rupert Spira fanboy for about 4-5 months beforehand (I saw he was at 1000 from the book) and it was an incredible step up in understanding from being an Eckhart fanboy loool, however despite being addicted to his videos and books for 4 months or so, I didn't make tremendous progress, was considering his retreats, and may go on one eventually just for fun, but I personally think $1000 on working 1-1 with a teacher > $1000+ on 1 7 day Rupert Retreat. So, I can't remember exactly but my original LOC was like 580 or so, but LOC is just a model and isn't that important really, like all concepts must be dropped eventually, however, it's a great tool for evaluating your own awakenings and/or teachers etc. I also learned a lot about the Enneagram and my own humanity, it explained a lot of how I act and I recommend everynone doing Enneagram work. I have been receiving RASA since April roughly 1-2 times a month, usually every fortnight, and for me it has basically acted as a gradual 'Clearing' of any blockages, issues, problems I had in my own unique awakening process, as well as facilitating several awakenings in the days after, often subtly realizing certain things. It started with an awakening into 'No Self' and there being 'No-Doer' this is similar to what good old Eckhart/ Fred Davis etc teach, the whole 'there's nobody there' 'you are the one who's aware' it's awesome opening yourself to Non-Duality and this was a drastic change in my direct experience of reality, however, the 'problem' of other and world is certainly not solved here, and a true full awakening can't use negations such as 'No' the heart yearns for fulfilment and love, we will get to that. I then had an awakening into 'Being Everything/ God/ All, this is an expansion from 'No Self' into EVERYTHING being me, honestly it's very blissy and this was like a honeymoon stage for me, I was lost in life and the bliss of this awakening, to be honest, this was incredibly fun and it's easy to see why many don't move past this, as you also gain incredible 'Cosmic' knowledge, you could call it a 'Cosmic Self' as such, the space of presence in this awakening was incredible. You become the Universe. However, it isn't the end, as there is still an indentity as 'Everything/ Universe' etc, Nisgardatta wrote this awakening as the 'First Big Step.' However, this stage is not the Absolute, it goes beyond that. Next, was my awakening into Love, and this is also amazing. Realizing all is Love and Love is the substance of everything is fucking amazing, this is the next 'step' beyond being ALL and explains why teachers such as Mooji and Bentino Massano have so many scandals, as an awakening into this love has not happened, so while awakened, scandals are still possible at that stage. This awakening also made me kinda obsessed with my teachers, my love for them and those around me deepened beyond words, even for random people in the street, I was also starting to show and feel emotions much more, a simple move about the injustice of 0 hour contracts in the UK made me ball, as a 7 this was a key step to my journey as I was so keen to avoid and escape negative emotions instead of embrace and feel them. However, in modern times, traditional paths are not followed as much so it's easy to not get caught up here like many mystics of the past who couldn't let God or their Guru go. 'If you see Buddha in the street, kill him' fits well here. A surrender into the unknown is essential though, a deep unthinkable surrender, but the love you experience is beyond amazing, and is of course worth surrendering the 'Cosmic Knowledge' for, this can be especially hard for us westerners. Look at Ken Wilber for example as the perfect example of a guy who has not done this, he loves his models and cosmic knowledge, I love his work and am by no means shitting on him, just to illustrate what I mean by 'cosmic knowledge.' My next awakening was incredibly fun to say the least, a realization of the absolute. I won't lie I became a bit of a hermit for a while as realization of the absolute is so god damn beautiful and astounding it can be easy to get lost here, you realize ALl is The Self, the mind is completely dropped, knowledge is dropped, the 'other' is seen through, however it's like putting a slight protective cave between yourself and the world, instead of embracing THIS as it is, you want to control your environment to suit the bliss, the peace etc and as a result subtly reject the world, there is one final step to make. Common theme here is Monks who go off and live alone, or those who create a perfect environment for peace, although these don't always mean one is here, they are common markers. And, then we arrive to now, my most recent awakening into the true absolute, into true Self-Realisation in all it's glory. THIS IS IT, means THIS IS IT, this moment as it is is perfect beyond words, the ordinary is the very extraordinary you are after, what more could there be than THIS. This very planet is the Buddha planet, is heaven, is Nirvana, not some special space you can attain when you gain your enlightenment wings and fly off. The absolute includes absolutely everything, it is beyond enlightenment and non-duality, all concepts are washed away and the World is seen to be The Supreme Self. everyone is seen to be the Self and The Absolute is all there is. There is NO enlightened person, no other, no mind, no knowledge and of course no world just The Self. This resolves the issue of Duality and Non-Duality, as ALL is the Self, ALL can be embraced and enjoyed, it embraces both non-duality and duality, hence the ordinary becoming the extraordinary, 'duality' embodies truth as much as anything else, EVERYTHING is included, go embrace the world as it is. It is impossible to put into words as everything has become so 'ordinary' again, yet it will never be the same, the best phrase I have seen is 'Transcendental Duality' but that just adds concepts and can be confusing, it is basically pointing to THIS right now. Seeking is over. This as it is is perfect, the Ego will try hard to fight this of course, as will the mind, but resistance leaves you, you go beyond any form of concepts around this work, whatever arises now will be embraced and enjoyed. I am unlikely to do it justice with words, but that explains my 8 month journey working with Ananda so far, it's been fucking amazing to say the least, if you have any questions about RASA drop them below, I get they'll be a LOT of skepticism and thinking wtf is this guy on about, but I'm used to that by now. In terms of what's next? Just go enjoy life. Do what you love, and love what you do. Whether that's starting a business (a conscious one of course ) or becoming a Spiritual teacher, or even going to work in starbucks, just do whatever you want. You will be free and Happy, the seeking is over and all that is left is to enjoy the game of life, for me Happiness, fun and enjoyment are always at the top of my to do lists, if I don't love what I do, I see no need to carry on doing it, of course you have to be practical about this. Oh, and of course, whatever you do at this stage will always come from Love, therefore, desire as big as you well please, with Love as your driving force you have the world at your fingertips, it doesn't mean you become passive at all. Personally, I am in the process of growing my businesses, playing sports, having fun with friends, deepening my relationships, helping people grow their businesses and more importantly Living NOW. In the future, I wish to become someone to help facilitate awakening, not just a teacher, but a 'finisher' who actually helps awaken people to the Absolute, however I'll only be waking up myself, time after time Happy new year everyone!

Glad to see some more fellow RASA recipients on here... Looks like @LfcCharlie4 has done a good job getting the message through! @wavydude Evaluating my own experience and putting on my ultra sceptic hat, I could possibly say that the relaxation and tingling I feel on my head, hands and feet whilst receiving the transmission could be placebo, but I wouldn't know how to explain away the moments of expansion I felt in the 700s. I wouldn't be able to say that the Divine Love that reduced me to tears on multiple occasions in the 800s was placebo. It'd be tough to argue that the Spiritual Heart on the Right awakening, along with the bliss that comes with Being in it, is placebo, or the natural dropping away of a lot of my desires. @Gneh Onebar the purging face is definitely no joke... The transition from the high 500s to the 600s absolutely kicked my ass. Well done for running the test guys!

Transmissions are far far from bullshit. Once you've received enough of it you will notice almost every true Master is transmitting high energy. These days i can get completely high on bliss by viewing gangaji and mooji on youtube. The highest teachings are transmitted through silence. The words don't mean anything.

Yes,...recently downloaded the book,...and reviewed much of it,...as some were bringing it up in dialogue, and wanted to see if it had any relevance for Conscious Awareness,...concluding that it doesn't. Agree,... many love this neo-advaita stuff,...very Wow! stuff for those transitioning away from Western Absolutist beliefs,...and yet, neo-advaita is itself Absolutist. As for myself, my background in books was in Mahamudra,...which did not contradict my own experiences,...that both duality and Oneness are illusory. Thus it could be said that I'm non-dual and non-One. “He who thinks of mind in terms of One or Many casts away the light and enters delusion” - Saraha Oneness is as an old Aristotelian construct,...and along with the meme of monotheism was for centuries imprinted upon the Collective. Look what they did to Hippasus for his blasphemy of the Greeks universal view by suggesting irrationals,...they killed him. Pythagoreans killed anyone who discussed any numbers other than rational numbers, for their universe was governed by ratios that arise from One. An absolute truth is,...if duality ceases its motion, the One Lever upon which it effects its motion also ceases. This is why Lao-tzu and Buddha considered Advaita concepts as useless. "The Tao gives birth to One. One gives birth to yin and yang. Yin and yang give birth to all things....The Tao gives rise to all form, yet it has no form of its own." Lao-tzu Oneness is akin to being stuck in a paradigm,...an energy Loop,...with the loss of individual Conscious Awareness after death. This is why Naropa taught that "By learning to recognize Clear Light during one's lifetime, an adept may return to it without difficulty when the shock of death threatens to disorient them.” - Naropa. To retain one's Conscious Awareness after death. The Advaitist cannot realize that,...because of their belief in Oneness. The Great Juncture is uncover the Fulcrum, upon which the One Lever and Duality moves,...I call it Undivided Light. Imagine joining me for a trip in an amazing LightCraft, a vehicle that can reach the speed of light. We are about to accelerate to so called light speed, that is 299,792 kilometers per second (186,282 mps). If you are unfamiliar with Einstein’s theory of relativity, as we approach 299,792 kps, time slows to zero, space no longer exists, and mass cancels itself out. You do not enter a new dimension, but a dimensionlessness within the Still Bliss of undivided light. For those who have already ventured there, an immediate inner inquiry comes to our attention if we allow it: "How did we reach a velocity of 299,792 kilometers per second and arrive at stillness?" You just stepped into light’s shoes, connecting with light’s own point of view, a view, to paraphrase Peter Russell, that light travels no distance in no time, and thus it has no need for speed. In fact, undivided, clear light has not traveled a meter in all eternity. Don’t worry if you don’t grasp this yet; it took Tilopa nearly three years to grasp the dakini secrets through grinding sesame seeds. Our duality reality of divided, projected, simulated light is 299,792 kilometers per second slower than the Stillness of what Mahamudra calls the Clear Light of Vajra (and Gabrielle Roth pointed to through the Silver Desert). When you realize that, you begin to gnow Who you are because you directly understand When you are. In duality, everything is in the past. All divided light, the whole electromagnetic field is in the past. It makes no difference how fast energy equal mass square divided light (E=mc²) is moving, for even at 299,791 kilometers per second, undivided light is perceived as moving 299,792 kilometers per second faster. That’s why Einstein called it relativity,...not Absolute. Energy–mass is relative, conditional, and in the past (mc² < c). Buddhism has stories of this,...for example,...Shakyamuni Buddha and Angulimala, the wearer of a garland of fingers. Angulimala was a notorious bandit who cut off a finger from each of his victims and wore them all around his neck. Although there are several variations of the story, the punch line is nearly the same. One day, Buddha, the light of Asia, was walking calmly along a road in the Kingdom of Kosala, where Angulimala was seeking his next victim. Seeing Buddha, Angulimala ran up to bash him from behind, yet he could not get close enough, and the faster he went, the Awakened One seemed to go that much faster. Infuriated and bewildered at not being able to catch him, Angulimala shouted for Buddha to stop. The light of Asia replied, “But I’m standing still. If you desire to catch me, you too must be still.” This is where oral traditions, especially Theravada ones, go off into different invented morals. The true pearl in the tale is that no matter how fast you move to catch light, light will always be 299,792 kilometers per second faster. Undivided light can only be caught through stillness,...it cannot be realized through non-duality. And what does Oneness look like? There’s a story in the Kevatta Sutta of a talented monk who wanted to find out the answer to the question, “Where do the four elements cease without remainder?” Through meditation he reached the Heaven of the Four Great Kings, who did not know the answer. Next he went to the thirty three gods in a higher Desire Realm heaven, but none of these rulers knew either. He then asked King Sakka (Indra), the king of these gods, but Sakka did not know the answer. Up and up he went asking all sorts of gods at each and every higher level. Finally he came to Great Brahma, the Creator, the One Uncreated, Knower of All. When the monk finally achieved an audience with Great Brahma, Brahma appeared in all his majesty and glory announcing, "I am Great Brahma, the Conqueror, the Unconquered, the All-Seeing, All-Powerful, the Lord, the Maker and Creator, the Ruler, Appointer and Orderer, Father of All That Have Been and Shall Be." The monk then humbly and respectfully asked his question, but all Great Brahma did was repeat, "I am Great Brahma, the Conqueror, the Unconquered, the All-Seeing, All-Powerful, the Lord, the Maker and Creator, the Ruler, Appointer and Orderer, Father of All That Have Been and Shall Be. The monk eventually got frustrated and said, “I know you are "Great Brahma, the Conqueror, the Unconquered, the All-Seeing, All-Powerful, the Lord, the Maker and Creator, the Ruler, Appointer and Orderer, Father of All That Have Been and Shall Be," but I asked you a question about where the four elements cease without remainder. The Great Brahma replied, “Listen little monk, don’t embarrass me. All these other gods are listening and think I know everything. If you want to know the answer to a question like that, don’t ask me. I don’t know the answer. For a question like that, you have to go ask the Buddha. Buddhists have a saying,..."Contradictions in perspective among those Seeing the profound do not occur" – Taranatha. The differences between Prajnaparamita and neo-Advaita are irreconcilable. Even Ramaji's kinesiological divination cannot bring them into harmony.

2g Psilocybe Cubensis Trip Insights: -all fear is imaginary -insanity/sanity is just a groundless distinction -language is extremely limited -the inner child is still inside of you at all times, the innocence and bliss is still there and has never left -the human form is a representation of duality (symmetry-right eye, left eye, nostrils, ears, limbs. ect) -I asked about my emotional baggage and I got an answer saying that I already have healed a lot of traumas, I need to take a higher dose to go deeper next time. Felt like I was on the brink of interacting with entities but couldn't quite channel them, although the whole time it really felt like I was only with myself, except my ego took a huge backseat and all neurosis were gone.

I have had very similar life decision like yours 2 years ago. I'm also a psychonaut, so here is a little technique of my liking. I'd say, try to think thid stuff through, be strategic about this decision. Literally reserve an hour a day for a week, where you will close everything off, be alone, take pen and paper and start writing stuff down - ask yourself a question regarding to this decision and try to answer it to yourself, use illustrations if you feel like. Some examples would be: Why am I currently studying the course I'm studying? Why did I start? What future opportunities does the knowledge I gain during the course ooen up for me? Am I satisfied with the university environment? Do I feel like I have already gained the basic understanding of this profession, so swapping to a different course won't necessarily be a waste (you wont get a diploma, but your mind has been expanded)? What could be better in the different course? Where do I see myself in 10 years, if I make the decision to swap? Watch Leo's videos on questioning and you will know, how powerful this exercise can be. Come up with your own questions (that is perhaps the most essential part) tailored towards your very own situation. To close this week of being strategic motherfucker. You can plan another psychedelic trip of low-medium intensity (for me this would be 2-2.5g of shrooms). Stay alone, just like you have been doing each hour every day and even in the same room if possible - to bring out that thoughtfulness you have built up. Now the intention for the trip will be to conclude your week, connect to your intuition and/or infinite intelligence, ask some deeper concluding questions and see, where the trance takes you. I have smoked nndmt in this way also and it is out of this world, how clear of an answer your can get. So simple yet so profound. Sometimes you might need more trips so it is ok, but space them out - dont rush this. Then make sure to act on that answer and don't let your monkey mind distract you. You will be given gold, so make it into a piece of beauty and don't let the monkey shit on it! Follow your bliss. Trust the Universe, Trust the process. When I now look back, it feels like a Hollywood movie for when I made these meaningful life decisions and I'm incredibly thankful for it. Take care and good luck!

@VeganAwake I am not talking about Ego, I am talking about Human integration, maybe it will help if I explain in terms of Psyches? You have an insight say that you are God, but then you need to integrate this insight into your life and way of being, there can be habits that have unreal momentum from years of reinforcement, this is more about the Human side of things than existential. I know you're just going to say this is Ego, but yes while when you have thoughts, feelings, sensations there is NOBODY at the centre just pure awareness, it will still FEEL as if there is someone and unless you go live in a diaper and want to actually participate in the world, being 'detahced' from relationships, people, if you have children etc is a very dangerous thing imo, almost a numb state. What 1000 represents is complete self realization, the END of seeking, I have arrived home in the kingdom of heaven, and know myself to be The Self alone. However, this is a key point of going full circle, I know while in this body I will still be human, have a personality and interests and still be 'Charlie' which in my opinion is beautiful, unique expressions of awareness as our individuals is to be embraced and enjoyed, what fun would life be if we were all blank canvasses? As much as you won't want to admit you still have a personality, things you like, girls/ boys (idk you and don't want to offend) you are attracted to more than others, hobbies you enjoy more, however yes you no longer IDENTIFY as just that, but individuality will continue after awakening. It is nothing to do with seeking spiritually speaking. I can guarantee you, you have a shadow to integrate especially as your awakening is fresh, I can't say what lies in your sub/ unconscious but there will be 'shit' you as a Human need to deal with to fully integrate your awakening. Maybe you don't get what I mean by integration I'm not sure, but it is NOT seeking, it is more of an inner clearing of all everyone has suppressed over the years, WinterKnight touched on this with his talk on PsychoTherapy. I myself was lucky in terms of my childhood, however, there could be past lives Karma to deal with idk yet, I'm still in a honeymoon phase. As I said 1000 is a complete end to the journey of seeking. I feel completely stabilized in happiness and peace, compared to this time last year was constant overthinking and low level of depression. But is only the beginning of the journey of life and deepening, that never ends, to me life truly begins at 1000, as you are now free, as any resistance to life has evaporated, and all there is is the spontaneous joy of living life moment to moment, I have no idea what the next moment will bring, but all I know is there will be complete acceptance and enjoyment whatever arises. This article could help, only decent one I could find aside from paid Satsangs that I cannot legally share. https://www.scienceandnonduality.com/article/integrating-the-shadow-in-awakening @WelcometoReality During earlier awakenings integration of the shadow happened slowly, such as integrating deeper love into my personal relationships, and treating everyone as The Self, as me. In terms of my shadow, I still have a fair amount of work to do, 1000 represents home existentially, seeking is over. There then arrives a 'clearing' period, often Enlightenment is called destructive and I can see why. @Haumea2018 can shed more light on this as he has actually been through the process. @zeroISinfinity It's merely limits of language, you're right there is no 'I' to be enlightened. If you know of a better way to say it please inform me, I am not meaning to say my 'self' has awakened, it is merely awareness becoming aware of itself. However, I feel saying things like that just adds concepts and confusion to many. The Self has realized itself and has now taken center stage. @Nahm I don't think I'm ready just yet, this thread is exposing how poor I am at articulating in words these things, I would need to become much more concise and direct, as I can hardly explain basic Maths concisely to people when they ask, let alone the Absolute lol. I would also want to be able to give a form of transmission, ideally RASA, and would like a deeper understanding of the Enneagram, as each human has a unique path to awakening, and personality type plays a huge role in this. For example, a 7 (me) hates negativity and being bored, therefore, I would constantly read and watch instead of facing my feelings and the silence. Whereas, a 9 (Tolle, Ramana) is addicted to peace and bliss, therefore can become lazy and just bliss out all day long, so instead needs to and meet people and socialize and stop using their bliss or peace as a way out to face their fears. Hopfully you get what I mean & How are you finding coaching so far?

@Florian It resonated with me a lot, and I wasn't sure if it could help you. I am seeking a "better' life. Happiness, love, bliss, etc. Not sure if you're a "seeker" too, just thought i would share the resource.

Apportioning blame for suffering to God is analogous to the characters in a film blaming the screen for their misfortunes. There is a difference between the content and the medium which conveys it. The medium in our cases is consciousness (a.k.a. God). Consciousness is resolutely neutral, in fact it is outside all suffering and it is meta to its content. In my opinion to be enlightened is to be at one with the meta-nature of consciousness and hence above all suffering, but also above all ecstasy. In this context to say that being enlightened is this or that experience is to miss the point or more accurately to be still caught up in the content of consciousness. The meta-nature of consciousness is without description or attributes, but it is directly knowable. The analogy with film characters is that the characters can get to understand their screen. Consciousness can know itself - that is its nature. But it is also powerful enough to indulge itself and to get caught up in its own content. How does the content then differ from the medium? This is like the difference between the knot and the string that makes it. Because consciousness is reflective or recursive (it knows itself) it can tie a knot in itself – like a string that is able to tie itself into a knot. Why is suffering in the content and not the medium? The first clue is the transitory nature of suffering. Suffering has a characteristic ebb and flow and so suffering is by nature impermanent. Any experience which is transitory must be unreal or imaginary because it happens on the knife-edge of the present moment. No sooner has it happened than it becomes “lost” to us again. In other words the entire content of consciousness is transitory and ephemeral – it is all “appearances” never again to be repeated in exactly the same way – yesterday’s suffering is not today’s suffering. Suffering is an appearance like a knot in consciousness. The meta-nature of consciousness is on the other hand not impermanent, because it has no attributes to change. Because it has no attributes it is indifferent to suffering and not the cause of it. The screen of the film does not care about the suffering of the characters playing out on it. God does not directly cause suffering or cause bliss.

Follow your bliss