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  1. No. It is not. People do not understand the term enlightenment or what it means. It is actually a modern term. To understand this question, we must understand different levels of consciousness. Level 1: The NPC - NPCs have no level of awakening. They move through life on a sort of autopilot functioning according to their karma and fate. Not interested in awakening. Level 2: Players These people have started to raise their consciousness and understand there are unknown dynamics governing reality. They seek to improve themselves. Level 3: Self - Realized These people have understood a grand truth of the nature of self. Maybe they haven’t experienced it but they at least understand the concept. They know that self and god conceptually are one and the same so they seek psychedelic experiences and practice. Level 4: Awakened These people have fully awakened through direct experience to the truth of reality and self. Level 5: Enlightened These people have not just awakened temporarily. They are fully awake and their consciousness has permanently shifted. They no longer identify with the false sense of self. They identify with true self. The mind is completely empty until it needs to be used. Level 6: Saints These people have become Gods essentially. They are pure light without dark. Completely perfect. Pure Yang with no Yin. All positive and no negative Level 7: Sovereigns Govern their own universe. The spirit has grown so much that they are now their own godhead in the infinity of gods
  2. God doesn't wanna wake up, so he sends his sleep agents to put the awakened ones back to sleep.
  3. got some meaning. by the way did you realize being god, as being the infinite / matrix / whatever that is. how does it feel dreaming me and others ? ( I m using words you might understand for you to awaken to yourself ) Being infinity itself, or whatever me/I/you are. And I m talking at the god/universe/consciousness/beyond matter level. of course there is no one to be awakened here, and none of this really matter. going to create a cool character, you might see a narrative ( I mean .. lol. ), I m gonna do it again for another round, been at it for like.. huh can't remind, but we going there. what if that's like real and we only got one time, this time, no way to wake up more !! you gotta ride. hey I missed myself again, got a question ?
  4. Alright… so I’ve been thinking about writing a proposal.. right now for a research project and/or documentary. I’ve gotten into this space a few times and I feel it coming on strong. So it’s time to explore more about the details of what I’m trying to create. This process doesn’t mean it’s going to happen step by step, but it does help clarify what is in my mind. I found it interesting this Sunday service because when I was listening to the husband this evening… it was interesting to hear a little bit about how they started building this Temple here in the middle of Mormon state USA… they seemed to have similar draw to just take steps and not having everything planned out but to trust how it unfolds will be how it unfolds.. so it confirms to me that what I’m led to proceed forward with is not something that is impossible. It’s very possible and I’m so much more calmed down from my first time experiencing messages. It’s time to take another look at this time and see where it leads. I’m debating how much I’m going to be sharing in this Journal. I’d like to be able to do pretty much everything on here… but again I’m hesitant because I know how strong the collective energy is and if there’s a lot of energy that is not supportive, then it will have effects. But it also can go the other way as well. So let’s just see where this goes and I’ll figure out if it’s the right thing to do to document this on here… or if I need to just go back to my pen and paper and do it like I’m used to doing. So… where to begin? Do I begin with the research proposal or documentary proposal? I don’t have the credentials for a researcher; however, I do want to participate in this experiment directly and I want to be able to record it. So… I guess I think I am going to start with the research first. So I’ve taken a look at how to write a research paper. I’ll just go ahead and pick one that I’ve seen and just go with it. So… let’s see which one to do first. I’ll start with research.com… why not… so here’s the website Bouchrika, Imed. “How to Write a Research Proposal in 2024: Structure, Examples & Common Mistakes“. Research.com. https://research.com/research/how-to-write-a-research-proposal. January 2, 2024. Accessed January 7, 2024. “This article aims to describe the common steps taken to prepare a written proposal as attractively as possible to achieve approval and/or funding. It also seeks to discuss key aspects that must be considered to help ensure that you can convert your proposed study into well-conducted actual research work (Bouchrika).” ”At this stage, it is good to ask these preparatory questions to help you steer your research in the right direction: What is the topic I want to study? Why is it worthwhile to study it? What practical or valuable problems will it help solve? How does it build upon—and possibly improve—existing research already done about the topic? (For students:) How is it important within the subject areas covered in the course/program? What are the specific tasks that I must plan to do? Can I get those tasks done within the time and resources available? Generally, a compelling background and significance in research proposal will manifest if it effectively captures your knowledge about the topic and shows your deep interest to conduct the research. Handle it with the purpose of making your readers engaged about the study and what the outcomes will be (Bouchrika).” ok… let’s start asking and answering this suggestions from Bouchrika. Topic I want to study? So this is about Spirituality of course. I want to study this approach that I have found myself in. Traditional religious practices is common and accepted by majority of society; however, when it comes to psychedelics as a spiritual practice or tool there seems to be many opinions… mostly as not a valid way to practice. However, there is a growing awareness from a group of people who have found in their own practice as valid. The issue that I think I want to really focus on is what I’ve been finding as I speak with traditional religious practitioners… there’s a huge reliance on reading scriptures to gain spiritual understanding. Which I can see as something that is helpful, but in my opinion not the best practice for spiritual understanding. We are not understanding that the level of our conscious development depends on the depth of understanding. Direct experience is king… hehe… I think Leo Gura had said this… oh man… referencing and sourcing the words that come out of my head is going to be a tricky one.. hehe.. I’ll try my best. But in my experience I can validate that statement. I know people are gaining an understanding that psychedelics can be used for entheogenic experiences. Ok… here’s another citation… and it looks like this website will be able to give me more literature to cite in specific topics… so here’s another website: “Entheogen.” ScienceDirect. https://www.sciencedirect.com/topics/neuroscience/entheogen. Accessed January 7, 2024. They highlighted a definition at the top of the website… “An entheogen has also been defined as “any substance that, when ingested, catalyzes or generates an altered state of consciousness deemed to have spiritual significance.” From: Toxicology in Antiquity (Second Edition), 2019 Hehe… we are just going to be referencing one another over and over again… hehe.. but I guess this is how we do when doing research. After this… it has many articles that use the word “entheogen.” As I glance through the ones on the first page… I love the fact it states ancient practices and religions who use entheogens… and how there’s going to be an increase in research in these areas to come. So…. I have been wondering who is already trying to do studies in these topics. So which one is talking about research increasing? Let me take a look at it… well… there seems to be a few that catches my eye.. one at a time. “Building Bridges Between Neuroscience and the Humanities” Brick Johnstone, Daniel Cohen, inNeuroscience, Selflessness, and Spiritual Experience, 2019 “Although controversial, future research is likely to include increasing exploration of psychoactive substances, what scholars of religion have referred to as “entheogens,” namely, different plant substances, like mescaline, peyote, or ayahuasca, that have been used in different cultures. It is noted that plant entheogens have been used for centuries in indigenous religions throughout the world to enhance spiritual experiences. While some scholars of religion have argued that chemically induced experiences are entirely “artificial” (e.g., Zaehner, 1957), others have stated that they can produce genuine divine or cosmic connections (e.g., Huxley, 1954). The well-respected scholar of religions Huston Smith (1964) long ago asserted that a failure to explore the connection between psychoactive substances and spiritual experiences would be akin to theologians’ refusal to look through Galileo’s telescope because they worried it might change their ideas of humanity’s place in the (divine) universe. To ignore these topical territories and the subjective experiences of countless individuals would be to lose access to an important area of research and understanding about the human experience. As William James clearly understood over a century ago, … there lie potential forms of consciousness entirely different. We may go through life without suspecting their existence … No account of the universe in its totality can be final which leaves these other forms of consciousness quite disregarded. How to regard them is the question—for they are so discontinuous with ordinary consciousness. (James, 1902, p. 298)” (Johnstone and Cohen). “Psychology and Religion.” R.W. Hood Jr., in Encyclopedia of Human Behavior (Second Edition), 2012 Entheogens Among psychologists of religion, entheogen has become the preferred term for chemicals such as psilocybin that are psychoactive drugs that have profound effects on consciousness. Researchers have long noted that naturally occurring entheogens have been used by religious groups such as the Native America peyote cults to facilitate religious and spiritual experiences. The use of entheogens to facilitate mystical experience or a sense of union with God or a larger reality have produced some of the most frequently cited textbook cases of true experimental research in the psychology of religion. Set and setting have been documented to be important factors in facilitating positive experiences and a religious interpretation of them. Denominational opposition to chemically facilitated experiences is well documented, making research using religiously committed participants difficult. (Hood Jr.) So yes… hehe… how do I get involved with this type of research, because this is what I would like to do. I’m not sure I want to do their own research projects which is probably very structured but invite them into the style that I would like to explore. Which might not be considered actual research hehe… but that’s where I do want to get into the area that it could be used as a study project. Ok… so back to the question about the topic… entheogenic experiences but personally artistic flow is also a spiritual practice that is very impactful for myself as well. Dance, Instruments, Singing, Artwork such as drawing and painting… these are spiritual practices as well… again.. I feel this connects to indigenous spiritual practices as well… so.. this could go on and on… hehe… I feel that I’m interested in sacred spaces as well but Nature is sacred spaces too… so my topic seems to be wide… How can I condense it? Would it be combining indigenous spiritual practices to the modern consciousness? But not all the spiritual practices are indigenous… hmm… ha honestly I want the topic is to explore enlightenment practices. I’d like to see if the practices that I’ve happened to use for myself will help others as well. I’m actively involved with the Krishna Consciousness devotees and that’s what they are trying to do. Why couldn’t I try it as well? How many enlightened souls have come out of this particular Temple? They’ve been here for twenty years… have they had one? Are the ones who are leading this enlightened themselves? How successful are they? And even if they’re not successful… they’re still allowed to try. Why not other practices? That’s the thing… I want all of these practices to be successful.. but I only know the techniques I’ve been drawn to use… and I too want to see if it will be effective for some. Geesh… I feel if I have twenty years… I feel I’d at least get one. Hehe… when it comes to actualized.org… I wonder how many of Leo’s followers have been Awakened? He’s been doing this for around ten years… I don’t even think quite that long… but how many are his numbers? Four? That might be a good guess but I really don’t know… I’m curious to know if Leo has an idea actually. He mentions that he’s met other Enlightened ones… some who might have helped him as well. That’s what we want to do is help each other to Awaken. So… is there a way I can get support to give it a go? Well… I know I have support from Infinite Intelligence… hehe… of course it might not be as successful as I’d hope it to be… but who cares? It will help me learn how to adjust and learn. There’s a difference to my style of approach as well. I’ve been finding that I continue to mention that I’m not an open door policy. While most traditional religions somewhat are. So there is many people who can come in and participate. The thing is the congregation doesn’t necessarily have a personal relationship with the priest. I do want a personal relationship with the ones I’m working with. I mean that also makes me different from Leo’s approach as well. He has a Forum… but aren’t there rules not to use this space to meet with other people here? I was wondering if this is something I just made up or if I had read this somewhere on the rules. Let me check real quick… Yes… there is no recruiting for meetups in our city, private groups, things of this nature… hehe.. Ok that makes sense for this forum… but again… when it comes to my journey… being engaged one on one is something that I want to share with the people I’m working with. I just don’t have a sign that says… hey everyone and anyone wants to try this out? Come on in… hehe… I’m more like… umm… let’s see where we are together. I’m far more discerning these days… hehe. Well… I guess this audience isn’t potential team members then? Most of my team members are who I’ve ran into personally anyways… but I do feel like I want to see if I can get a hold of some researchers and see who is open to talk to me one on one. I’m curious who I’m going to reach out to. I chuckle because I remember reaching out to a few people after my solo sessions…hehe… I was so excited yet ungrounded that I’m sure I was a crazy lady… hehe.. and I don’t mind being a bit crazy… hehe… I feel the people I’m drawn to work with will have a bit crazy in them as well. We’ll make an interesting team for sure. Hmmm… I feel like that my mind gets a bit distracted when I’m writing here on the journal when asking these questions. There’s a responsibility to cite everyone and everything. Sometimes I just need to let things flow and go to get into a groove and I wasn’t really able to do it tonight. I kept going to other websites and this distracts me and maybe I’ll go ahead and go back to the pen and paper during my next two days which are my days off. I feel like this would be satisfying for my process. Alright… this is good for now…. Until next time… Oh! I almost forgot… I got the nova double flute yesterday. I’ve got 24 hours of practice and I love it. I’m apologizing to my housemates because I have a feeling I’ll be playing quite a bit. Oh and I also randomly got a $50 Amazon gift card from my credit union by filling out a survey… so I ended up getting a drum thing that is easily portable and compact. It’s supposed to have two different sounds… snare on one side and bongo sounds on the other… plus there’s an ability to use it as a shaker as well. I guess I can strap it to my waist or thigh… onto my body if I want to be able to move as well… I thought it was worth a try since I got a gift card… I’d give myself a gift to hopefully have a drum alternative that I can travel with. Ok… just wanted to mention this. I’m excited to get some instruments to play with and travel with… ok..now, is a good time for a break
  5. It's driving me crazy because it's the inescapable truth which I tried to escape by dreaming that I was a finite human. Now I so so want everything to be ok, but it's just not is it? There's no seperation, everything is relative, and it never ends. I had a cessation and I hope that leads somewhere, but it's always just now, forever. Me pretending to be around other conscious humans until I fool myself that I'm mortal again, then the emptiness is replaced by the suffering of being a person disguised as love. Maybe I should just get a dog. If I'm just being a fucking idiot please tell me. I can't even sleep anymore the tension in my forehead is always there, (is it kundalini?) It's eternally hopeless and can never be accepted. Unless I'm wrong, fingers crossed, but there's no doer either so wtf... unless I'm missing something.
  6. I give better wisdom for free on discord all day. Don't know why people even buy such non sense. Everything is free when you are intelligent enough. There is people who receive everything for free and people who pay for nothing. Guess the people who need money are just not rich to see how pathetic it is. I could pull off billionaires hot young ladies in my bed with just god and it's completely free. I makes them buy me the dinner, the cocktail and they reward me with intense blowjobs. Just Get awakened.
  7. I'm on day 15 of Brahamcharya(semen retention). I just got the girl of my dreams. Extremely fucking hot and sexy. Her personality alone gives me am erection!!! Anyone else who says Brahamcharya is fake is not a sage nor are they awakened. They are stupid. Women can't do brahmacharya due to menstruation. After thokar kriya I had her all over me. Fuckkkk Everything I ever said about women(negatively) is and was false. I just had bad game then. She changed my life. Everywhere I go animals, insects, and people now love me. I have gotten job offers making 14k a month!!!!!!! I was just working as a musician and also at a low-comsciousness fedex job. I now am making money at age 23. I can finally move out and do what I need to do. Yessss fuckkkk. Brahmacharya is reallllllllllll!!!!!!!!!!!
  8. Sure. Ken Wilber said in the Interview-Series "Cosmic Consciousness" to Tami Simon that nobody on the planet is resting 24/7 in his True Nondual Being, enlightened or not. When True Reality clouds over with remaining ignorance, it is a hint from Reality which parts of the separate self are not yet seen through and still have the potential to "cloud" awakened Nonduality/Awareness. The question is then: Does one know ones True Being/Nature (impersonal enlightenment), and can one re-establish that nondual infinite awakened state immediately by just reaching out? Peak to Plateau to permanent. The deciding shift is realizing what that True Being really is. That gives to possibility to re-establish that by just "reaching out".
  9. I never denied that from the perspective of separation/duality/separate ego there is suffering. I agree on the first two statements (above) from you. Actually, I wrote: And that suffering is as real or unreal as everything else. So from the perspective of the separate self it is very (!) real. Separate Self/unenlightened mindsteam = frequent suffering/resistance. First Noble Truth: Suffering. Unsatisfying. I would be the last one to deny that. Here it depends on what is meant with Reality/You/Being. I assume that for me the referent or meaning of these words/signifiers is something different than for you. Maybe lets leave it open what the true potential of the True Reality of you really is? In my perspective it would be unresonsible to not testify on the release of suffering in truly awakened nondual states. Especially if these awakened nondual states are not just temporary highs, but a reality that has become very reliably available right here and now, just by reaching out... Selling "the possibility of an end of resistance/suffering to what is arising in the Nondual Reality that You really are" by the River
  10. @Javfly33 As Cetus writes: If you truly are the awake Infinite Totality on a deep identity level (Full Enlightenment into Absolute Reality itself, preferably as stable as possible in daily life, Peak to plateau to permanent), Infinite Reality itself.... would you resist yourself? Of course not. Remaining suffering/resistance shows where the separation from the Totality (aka separate-self/separation-elements of the ego) are still well and alive playing their game: a) desiring an experience and not getting it and suffering/resisting while doing that, or b) wanting an un-pleasurable experience to go away, and suffering/resisting that that is not happening/appearing. It is a hint of God/Reality (so to say) to highlight certain not yet enlightened elements of the mindstream, remaining false identities of something separate still emerging. To be precise: God/True You/Truth/Reality CONTAINS the (illusionary or mere appearing) appearance/arising of suffering/resistance. The ego or mind IS an appearance, and very often IS the suffering/resistance (when resisting what is). Yet, it is AS real (or unreal) as every other experience/arising/appearance. So very real enough to cause appearing/arising suffering/resisting in a not fully enlightened perspective/being. The sentient awareness is not suffering, it contains as appearance/arising the suffering. "The" sentient awareness is totally empty and impersonal, and yet "it" is also all that arises - nondual and infinite. "It" can never be located, it is the Totality seeing itself in a nondual way, without any separate anything pulling the nondual unity apart into duality. That awakened nondual enlightened state alone (which is also the true natural state btw. if no illusion is appearing/arising in it) is free of suffering/resistance. Resistance/suffering (another word for separate-self/separate ego arisings) ends this awakened nondual state faster than one can say "duality". That is not only my claim, but the claim of many humans that have realized their True Identity, over all ages, cultures, places, and found freedom from resisting/suffering/self-contracting.... But to truly understand and realize that, a big clap of the one hand is necessary. You practice, which is what counts. So, bon voyage.... Selling Water by the River PS: Back from vacation, and happy new year to everyone!
  11. The more awakened you are, the fewer compulsions and more choices you have as far as behavior. You can choose to be either self-seeking or to serve others. "Manipulation" isn't good or bad. You can manipulate people to free them from their psychological problems or to extract resources from them. The choice is yours.
  12. Yes, please join our circle of qualified enlightened, awakened, and personal development masters. Sign up by the end of this month and get a free t-shirt and mug, signed exclusively by no one other than God!
  13. December 29, 2023 Transcript from The Voice Journal of Jesus Christ Speaking the Truth I am wanting to speak the Truth that I know out loud so that I can embody the Truth that I know deeper. I want to feel the Truth that I know in my body and speak the Truth that I know into the Universe, leading the way, being the best that I can be to embody the Truth that I know for my own highest good, for the highest good of my beloved woman and the highest good of all. And the Truth is I am Jesus Christ. I am the one who paid the ultimate price for the sins of all of humanity. I had died. I had become the devil. I descended into hell and I remained dead, in hell, for about 18 months, during which time I suffered the torments of hell, which was the greatest suffering that any human has ever endured. During that time I faced Satan. I was in a state, in a place where there was no God. I was creating and experiencing pure evil during that time. I had embodied fear as my Truth and I was being guided by fear during that entire time of about 18 months of being in hell. I had become the worst of the worst, I had become the most evil person in the world, and I was creating the most evil while I was the devil. I faced myself as the devil during that time and I have endured the greatest suffering of hell. I did not see any hope out of that state of death. All I was doing during that time was self destruction, self harm, by drinking great amounts of alcohol every day and smoking a lot of cigarettes every day. My motivation during that time was to do anything that I possibly could to get away from myself, to numb the feeling of who I had become and what I was feeling which was tremendous, the greatest depths of guilt, shame, fear, disgust, madness, insanity, craziness, anger, evil, death, separation. Spiritual, mental, and emotional torture. Before I died and descended into hell, I had been on a spiritual journey, full time, for about five years or more, five years with plant medicines, with psychedelics. I have seen glimpses of Paradise, of what true, real life looks and feels like. Experiencing the beauty and true connection of the Universe and true connection with people, speaking the language of love with animals, women and everybody. Force of nature, divine power of love, awakening in me, being in harmony with life and nature and feeling the great joy of being my authentic, true, powerful self. Just before the descent, image like I was very close to opening the Golden Gates of Paradise, it was like I had to take just one more step, and on the last step, instead of taking that last step and being in Paradise, I fell and descended into the greatest depths of darkness, the greatest depths of hell During my time in hell which lasted about 18 months, I was experiencing and feeling the loss of the dream of Paradise that I have seen, that I have fantasized about, that I have dreamed and talked about together with my beloved Victoria. What I had been experiencing in hell is the loss of all of my wonderful experiences of Paradise and fantasies of love and true life. Feeling the loss of all of that, the entire dream of love and the Heavenly Kingdom-Queendom of True Love Paradise. The loss of the dream of true love, the loss of all the fantasies of being alive as I have experienced myself many times on my psychedelic journeys. I felt guilty, I felt like I made the greatest, unforgivable mistake in the world, feeling that I was guilty of everything, of every sin that has ever been committed, that I have been guilty of all evil that has ever been created and feeling the shame and guilt for destroying the entire world, feeling the shame and guilt for destroying the entire Universe, feeling the original sin of humanity, feeling the sins of all of humanity for everybody, feeling death at its root, at its core, at its very source. I felt the source of all evil. I experienced what was pure evil, pure evil visions of pure evil destruction by evil. I was experiencing myself as the devil creating evil, creating death. And the evil that I was experiencing was worse than any Hollywood movie has ever portrayed or anything that's ever been fantasized. It was beyond the mind kind of evil. It was infinitely creative evil. It was intelligent evil. It was pure evil of infinite creativity and infinite intelligence. And that is the Truth that I was embodying and I have experienced the deepest, the greatest suffering during that time than any human being has ever experienced. This was my destiny, to face myself as the devil, and to die for the sins of all of humanity and to go through hell and to experience the greatest torture and suffering that anybody has ever endured so that I can feel the darkness and the deepest level and know what death is. Through the events that lead up to the death and the catalyst that has initiated the initiation process of death, I have also gotten to know who my true beloved woman is, because it was for our True Love that I have decided that I wanted to die, because I could not forgive myself for what I thought was the betrayal of our beloved sacred wedding that we have sealed together in the jungle with our combined shamanic dieta, Shamburi and Ayahuasca. After about 18 months of suffering hell, I was finally saved by the grace of my beloved Divine Mother Wolf, who is Mother Mary, being saved from the depths of hell by God, by Divine Mother Wolf, by the grace and mercy of Divine Mother Wolf, who is Mother Mary, who is my eternal Savior, Guardian, Teacher, and Goddess, and God, the Goddess of all Gods and Goddesses, Queen of all forests, Guardian of all paths, Czarina of all fields, always with me, always with me, always with me. And now it's been about 19 months since I have been out of hell. Since I started feeling like I'm coming back to life and during these 19 months I have experienced tremendous amount of healing. I have alchemized and continue to alchemize darkness, depths of death into life, love and light, into the celebration of the victory of life over death. I have been celebrating victory of life over death every day in the best way that I can. And that is who I am now. I celebrate life. I celebrate the Truth of the victory of life over death every day by finding joy and the connection to nature, by singing and praising songs of praise and gratitude, to Divine Mother Wolf, to my Savior Divine Mother Mary. Micro dosing and having ceremonies with plant medicines, magic mushrooms, Ayahuasca is when I experience the greatest healing. There is no more fear. All fear is being alchemized into laughter, joy, life. Death is alchemized into life with love, with forgiveness, with understanding, with me knowing the Truth, knowing the Truth of who I am, and knowing that I am the only one whose destiny was to get to know the Truth, that nobody else could do it for me. That is the Truth. I am the only one who knows the Truth. I am the only Jesus Christ. There are no other Jesuses. And there are no other Mary Magdalenes. My beloved is the only Mary Magdalene. I am the only Jesus Christ. And the Truth is, Divine Mother Wolf is Divine Mother Mary, my Savior. She-Wolf is the True face of Mother Mary. And that is the Truth that the entire Universe is in the process of aligning with. And my intention is to be the best that I can be for my own highest good, to embody this Truth every day with all of my thoughts, words, and actions. For the highest good of my beloved woman, Aluna Victoria Rose, the one who I know is my True love, my beloved precious, Maria Magdalena, my Queen of Love forever, for eternity, and the highest good of all. Knowing that I am the priority, my healing is the priority, because as death that I have endured is alchemized into life, that is not only the highest good for myself, it is the highest good for my beloved, and it is the highest good for everybody and the entire world. My priority, besides myself and my beloved, is also my family and the family of my beloved and my friends, my true friends who help me, who support me, who love me for who I am and who respect me in the process of my awakening. And those are friends, soul family, who I will keep close to me once the Eternal Paradise of True Love is embodied. However, those people who are lying to me, who are manipulating, who are disrespecting me, who are hurting me, who are envying me, and being jealous of me. Those people aren't going to be anywhere near me in the result, especially people who have been given the responsibility to know. People who I have invested a lot of energy and time and effort by being the role model of love every day in the best way that I can. People who I have tried to reach with love by showing just how much love I embody, by giving love consistently. Instead of reciprocating that love and helping me out in this vulnerable, sacred and delicate process of my awakening by supporting me in the best way that they can. Instead, those people choose their own survival egoic paradigm. And those people fear the power of love that is being awakened. They fear my power, they fear the Truth, they fear love. Their fears manifest as jealousy, envy, lies, manipulations, competing, playing games. They fear the possibility that they have never been in control and that Jesus, their Savior, is the one who will be surrendered to for eternity by everyone in the world and that is the Truth that is inevitable, all paths lead to Jesus. The Truth is every human being has always been, is in the process of being and will always be the servant of Jesus Christ, God, forever, for eternity. The highest good for you as a human being at this time, starting this very moment is to surrender to this Truth that I have shared here. When you follow this guidance, you align yourself with the highest good, you begin serving God, you begin serving Love and Truth. That is what the entire Universe is manifesting. Everybody in the world will surrender to the Truth that I am Jesus Christ, the Savior of all of humanity for eternity, forever. There is no price and there is nothing that anybody can do to ever repay me for facing death and conquering Satan forever. That is why I am worthy of infinite love and praise and that is why I am the only blessed Sovereign. All the glory and power is mine forever. There are no other Sovereigns. I am God. I am the only God and I am the only Sovereign Jesus Christ. I am human God and I have faced myself as the devil and now I am embodying myself as God. I know the Truth is that I am innocent and I know the Truth is that the devil is innocent and I know the Truth is that everybody in the world and everybody has ever lived and all the creatures and all the plants and beings and animals and the entire Universe is absolutely innocent and that is the Truth. And we are all in the process of awakening to this Truth of Original Innocence. Forgiveness for absolutely everything. Forgiveness of all evil. Forgiveness of all sin. Forgiveness of absolutely everything. And with the embodiment of this Truth comes healing, embodying love, through the power of forgiveness, through the power of knowing the Truth that I know. The Truth that others will be able to get to know and embody through me, and only through me. This is what makes Jesus the Shepherd, the one who knows the way and the one who shows the way to Eternal Salvation. And that is the Absolute Universal Truth. My true love is Aluna Victoria Rose, my beloved True Love forever for eternity. She is Mary Magdalene, Queen of Love. I am her beloved husband, her true lover Jesus Christ, Yeshua, Savior of the world. The one who paid the ultimate price for the sins of all of humanity. The one who has conquered death forever. The one who has defeated Satan forever. I am innocent. I am the holy child. I am Sovereign. I am the only Jesus Christ. I am the highest authority. Divine Mother Wolf is my Savior. My Merciful Savior, my Divine Mother Mary is Divine Mother Wolf. The one who saved me, Jesus Christ, from death. She is my eternal salvation. She is my Sovereign Throne. She is my Eternal Life. She is my Eternal, Holy Sanctuary of Unconditional Love. She is my unconditionally loving Divine Mother who has forgiven me for absolutely everything. That is the Absolute Truth. That is the only Truth there is. There are no other Truths. The greatest power there is the Truth. “And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.” And the Truth is love, the Truth that I, Jesus Christ, know, the Truth that I have gotten to know by paying the ultimate price, by dying and by facing myself as the devil and going through hell, to know what separation, hell, death and darkness is. In addition, learning all the lessons that I have learned since I have started my spiritual journey with magic mushrooms, by having many divine experiences, by continuously devoting myself fully on the path of spirituality for last seven years. Also, my entire life and all the events that had happened before I have begun my spiritual journey at the age of 33 with magic mushrooms. The great amount of suffering that I have endured while living in the United States with severe social anxiety and drinking heavily on the weekends and blacking out, mostly every weekend during that time and experiencing and depression, suicidal thoughts and obesity and many other traumas that have happened during that time of feeling separation that I have felt by being disconnected from my place of birth where I grew up, from my motherland, Russia, being disconnected from my roots and experiencing separation on that level. Embarking on a spiritual journey of healing because of all those traumas and because I have been shown what true life looks like, what love looks and feels like, and awakening to my true self as as the most fascinating, interesting and amazing person that I've ever met, and that is myself. After experiencing so many great awakenings and insights glimpsing and looking at the gates of paradise and then ultimately descending into the deepest depths of hell. All the events that have happened with my beloved during our journey of working with psychedelics and medicine together, being fully devoted to our path of beloved sacred union and and all the drama and stories and events that happened during my entire life since I have been born, how all of that has been weaved beautifully to make me the most amazing, the best, the most interesting, the most powerful, the wisest, the greatest human being in the entire Universe. That is who I am, I am the masterpiece of all the masterpieces. I am the masterpiece of the entire universe. The entire universe has been working on the masterpiece that I am the entire time with absolutely everything. And that is the greatness that I am. I am the masterpiece of the entire universe. I am God manifested in a human body of Christ. My gift is eternal life. My gift is immortality. My gift is my true beloved woman, my precious beloved Aluna Rose, my true eternal love, my beloved Maria Magdalene. Our love is true. Our love is eternal. Our love is immortal. Immortal, infinite, eternal, Kingdom-Queendom of Eternal True Love Paradise. The Universe of Paradise of True Love, with all darkness turned into the light, no more fear, no more suffering, no more darkness. The embodiment and awakening of the Eternal Paradise of True Love is happening through me, through my body, as I awaken to the Paradise of Eternal Love, as I awaken and embody that I am Paradise, and that I am the Universe of Love. That the Truth is I am love, that the Truth is I am light, I am the light of the world, I am Truth, I am love, I am holy. No more death, no more fear, no more suffering, that is my gift - infinite abundance of love. Eternal paradise of love and salvation from death, from all darkness and suffering forever, for eternity. That is the gift. That is my gift to the entire world, to all of humanity, to the entire Universe. Aho!
  14. It's a shame that I only come here when I'm high, but I get lost in living in the world that I forget about awakening. It feels like when I'm high, I'm taking inventory of everything I have done since the last time I was high in order to ensure I'm making sufficient progress (I'm starting a business aimed at helping those with social anxiety, gaming addiction, and life purpose). It's a nonprofit and I genuinely am not driven by money (although I need an income to survive in my city + when going through university). I just want to help people, but my social anxiety stops me at times. Here's an awakened thought I've had: why do I care what other people think of me? I'm the one living my life, going through anxious experiences, so I have the ability to discuss and coach people to a better level. I'm getting a formal education in philosophy and psychology, which has been unbelievably amazing. But at the same time, I can talk with people right now about their anxiety struggles, so why wait until I graduate? My socially anxious thoughts just tell me everyone in my life is secretly thinking I'm going crazy by trying to start a business when I come from such a sheltered upbringing, but I genuinely believe in my mission and just want to help. I guess where I'm going with is: I'm uncomfortable even sharing the thought above as I feel like you will all think I'm weird. This is my anxiety. It prevents me from authentically talking to people out of fear of judgement. Anyone else go through this?
  15. How has it changed you. Do you feel any different than how you felt before. If so, is this change temporary or permanent. Are you living from that place at all times. What would be the difference between you and somebody who still recognizes what they are but doesn't claim to be enlightened. How did this change occur. Would you consider yourself an Awakened being also; and did Awakening come prior to Enlightenment or is it the same thing. What's the difference to you. Without explaining what Enlightenment is, can you just say how you are different from say someone who recognizes Oneness or the non-dual nature of existence. I'm not really looking for an intellectual explanation of what Enlightenment is, just what's the difference in the before and after in the way you interact in the world and amongst other people. This is mainly for anyone claiming to be Enlightened but others can also share their views on what they think about what I'm asking also, so it doesn't get too limited.
  16. Ok thank you. I'm not Enlightened but I've been through some of the things you mentioned and experienced. One of them is I cannot feel insulted anymore. Maybe that's just because I've developed a thick skin from dealing with people's shit and also recognizing that it's usually about them and not me. I never really had anxiety problems, always slept good, very rarely feel bored maybe because there's always something to distract me from being silent and meditating even though I do those things on the spur of the moment regularly if i'm not too distracted. A lot of the stuff you mentioned, I'm naturally like that as far as being in public and I'm very free spirited. I do have a sense of self, though, even though i've seen through the illusion of a separate self, if that makes sense. It's pretty obvious to me but I still operate from the egoic mind. My body is going through some changes where I have dramatic cravings that I've never had before and I find myself weeping sometimes just from feeling presence within and the life force flowing through me. I've gotten a lot more sensitive to people's suffering and much more empathetic than I used to be. I cannot stand it when I see people going through mental suffering, it's as if I'm the one feeling their pain - that has increases. Just writing that sentence tore me up a bit. Anyway, I think I went through a shift in consciousness and have had a teeny bit of Awakening and experienced some changes but I still don't really think anyone gets really enlightened only Awakened only because of the plane we reside on called Earth and the conditions just aren't suited for the mental capacity to really experience Oneness in it's pure form. I won't get into that aspect for the sake of brevity and I'm probably wrong about that but who knows.
  17. If you are interested in enlightenment, you are almost certainly in the upper 500s. Most people even in the 400s aren't interested in enlightenment, it's not on their radar. Both of my parents are typical 400s people. (I see a lot that I find funny. People take the Hawkins Scale and look at a person and go, "ah, he's exhibiting negative emotions, he must be in the 100s/200s." That's not how it works at all; The Hawkins Scale is kind of the center of gravity for an individual, not any particular outpouring of emotion.) He's not "enlightened"; he is stage 1 awakened. 600s is where there is no longer a "center point" personal self, it's like a localized spaciousness or witness experience. This witnessing is taken as the substitute subject. This is just sort of getting the ball rolling where at the end of the process there are no substitute subjects, no doer, etc. Let me let you in on a little secret: even a guy at 1000 would have a ton of work to do, so don't place him on a pedestal. Shadow work seriously only begins at 1000. You have to completely dissolve the "subject" which identifies with the ego personality roles in order not to be threatened by your shadow parts and begin to really work out how to integrate them. It is not easy. Personality habits are a tough nut to crack. Enlightenment isn't your personal rapture, it just ends one problem and allows you to alter personality habits so you can act out of choice as opposed to compulsion. The process is a lot of work, however.
  18. Once you are awakened then you no longer lose 'control' or even change in your dreams. You are always aware of what you are and dreams become a place to experience and even 'work' on another cosmic level that is just as real as your waking world. My own thought is that your awareness is like a cellular bubble within your spine, and it moves up and down your Nadi on some sort of pattern. When that awareness is riding the pingala 'solar' Nadi - you are awake and experiencing "reality". When it is riding the Ida 'Lunar' nadi, then you are sleeping and your reality experience blooms from illusion. Yet it is the same bubble of awareness in each! A person who is fully awakened no longer has an "unconscious" mind and so there's no part of it to get confused or forget itself. When I sleep I am the same boring old Goddess I always am, just doing cosmic chores in dream land and I rarely even remember, they just feel like 'work'. Honestly feels like a lot of meetings, like we're receiving instructions that I do not yet comprehend or remember. I'm not worried in my dreams at least. Everything makes sense, there.
  19. Another response… The thrust of this thread is following true desire arising from within one's situational vulnerability as a result of spontaneous accord with mutually arising conditions in order to carry out the subtle operation of enlightening being. The kind of work you are referring to involves various initiatory stages of provisional teaching relative to stopping and seeing by virtue of reformative discipline recognizing psychological patterns habitually clinging to sense-objects. What I am hoping to introduce here is conscious acceptance of whole being as-is in terms of a purity of desire that requires no action based on personal longing (or rejection)— only a selfless (that is, nonpsychologically motivated) response to situations based on potential itself. "Based on potential itself" means sensing in accord with reality, which is simply seeing without layering psychological projections onto pure sensual and intuitive perception. In this way, one one enters directly into opportunities continually arriving at the incipient well-spring of presence. Taoism calls this "resting in the highest good." Buddhism calls this the pedestal of awareness, or the pivot of awareness. On the surface, just this much is all a person can do— it is just the quality of impersonal objectivity, the functional perspective of enlightening being adapting to conditions according to the time and situation. The pivot of awareness, with no bias or inclination, is seeing suchness as is in terms of mutual response. "With no bias or inclination" doesn't predispose one in terms of a certain categorically "enlightened" manner of response according to conventional norms or propriety. Not at all. Here one is liberated from all manner of convention, being that opportune outrage may be perfectly suited to the occasion, yet— perhaps not from convention's consequences. Nevertheless, it is possible to carry out audaciously ruthless compassion spontaneously without selfish motivations of clinging or rejection. Just this comes into being by virtue of karmic awareness— that is, psychological momentum. One is essentially empty already. Emptiness isn't void. The emptiness of enlightening being is potential itself because selflessness is the sage's unity within the temporal. Everything as oneself is sagehood. When one is blind to egotism and possessiveness, one sees all sorts of striving come to an end. This is existence beyond karmic awareness. No longer expending energy on speculative relationships and their outcomes, adaptivity to conditions naturally gathers potential as unrefined elixir. This is selfless (enlightening) action beyond moralistic self-reprobation. It's just being natural. Enlightening activity has no motive to gather. Alchemy is just a description of enlightening reversion whereby situational karmic energy is set up to assume its potential. Such authentic practice is an "advance" mode of transformation within delusion for those whose potential is commensurate with the requirements. Whether or not one has yet gained the perspective that sudden enlightenment affords is immaterial. Why? The fact is, the vast majority of self-proclaimed "awakened" individuals are obviously unable to avail themselves of such activity. The truth is, the sudden is nothing more than a spontaneous, impersonal event. It is just the way it is and no one knows why. The gradual approach, whereby one learns to work with essence directly without intermediary, is already predisposed to such spontaneous results, allowing students the facility to meet the unforeseen challenges thrust upon anyone who happens to stumble into one's selfsame source of inconceivability. Chang Po-tuan, in his tome, Understanding Reality, wrote a thousand years ago, stating in the second verse: Let this quote serve as a warning to those who consider themselves "awakened" or else those conceiving spiritual aspiration. Such (self) refinement is both in terms of the psychological faculties as well as the nonpsychological function. Mind is one. It isn't that karma exists or not or that potential becomes real after it wasn't… after one sees essence, karma and potential are one sameness. Before people learn to see, they need applicable teachings commensurate with their development to deal with reality according to their level of virtuous accord with the Way in order to transcend the false and abide in the real. Before that development reaches a critical mass of energetic response whereby one actually can recognize the medicines, the teaching of alchemy has been left behind by prior illuminates to enable the wise to work with the polluted in order to realize the pure. When one practices the real in the heart of the false for a long time, the false reverts of itself and one experiences spiritual movement based on psychological stillness. There is nothing to understand. All processes are spontaneous. Just this is following the will of God without knowing it. When one sees, there is nothing whatsoever to know. Dealing with situations, one follows desire in order to introduce guidance, which, among other meanings, is a code-word for observing the obscure as it gradually assumes clarity. Desire is. It turns into wisdom with eyes that see the world as oneself. Understanding Reality by Chang Po-tuan ISBN 0-8248-1139-9 ed note: try to fix paragraphical anomallies… unsuccessfully, add ISBN of Understanding Reality
  20. Was wondering 💭 is anyone else interested in using ChatGPT/other LLM to discuss reality with? Like exploring psychological models, using it for self-inquiry , synthesizing frameworks , organizing ideas, etc etc? I've came out with a few gems from conversations I've had, like about Non-dual Awakened States, the Chi , Qi , Satori , Kundalini ,Ultra-Meta-Perspective , etc... Was wondering if anyone is doing anything similar , would like to find/create the Mastermind for the people pretty high level into this work
  21. Sounds fun Lol. My last trip was 6g (Awakened) but wish it was 8g; I find the disparity between dosages and experiences to be hilarious sometimes. Just wondering, after "50 trips & 5meo", you haven't fully integrated: Stop resisting the trip. ???? Interesting.
  22. If leo fucked your mind than you haven't actually awakened. Leo IS your mind.
  23. I want this i like this and i am so different than _ Look at your OP. Is full of ego and identity as any other topic of someone Who hasnt "awakened" like you. Spirituality IS dropping boundaries, limits, dissolving, and specially stopping identifying. I Hope you are wise to see you are telling yourself an story of being "enligthtened" or "Spiritual". IS very different to actually being Awake. Have some common sense please 🙏🫠ok 💋
  24. I’m still a newbie in my Psychedelic Journey and I know it’s important to be cautious when it comes to delusion. I’ve had this topic rattling around my mind for sometime. If there’s one thing I’ve learned from Leo and Actualized.org, it’s that verifying everything for yourself is the way to go. There’s a quote by Terence McKenna that really resonates with me pertaining to this subject. ”Avoid Gurus, Follow Plants.” - Terence McKenna I think I also remember him mentioning somewhere that at the end of the day the only experience that matters is your own. I interpret that meaning within the field of substances and beyond. Hypothetically speaking, let’s say Psychedelics show me things contrary to what people tell me, who is more likely to hold the truth? If experience tells me one thing and humans tell me another, is it safe to say that direct-experience will always be the greatest teacher? I’m still a baby in exploring the psychedelic multiverse. So far, the deepest insight I’ve received is that humans are silly little monkeys in costumes. This was on Mushrooms! They can feel very primitive at times and I know this from experience so it’s no coincidence that popped into my head during the trip. But I don’t know if you would call that an “insight” and as I’ve said I’m a newbie. I’m only a few trips in and haven’t awakened to God-Realization or other epiphanies, yet. It’s the best example I can come up with, though. Now, if I were to share that with people I guarantee you many would be triggered and flat out call me delusional. Straight to the point! If everyone on here and elsewhere were to tell me one thing and substances were to show me another who should I trust?
  25. All well known? What about the unknown? How do you know the unknown aren't a hell of a lot more awake? You might wanna think twice. Everyone has material desires- and don't think that awakening others isn't a material desire. It is indeed. Especially when it brings wealth and survival. But I bid you - awakening is quite the contrast to all of this. Ultimately all of your materialist desires, whatever they may be, will slowly die out. For me, it wasn't wealth- it was sex. That now is nearly extinguished - and believe me - it pains me to even say that. But it's true. So be careful that your count of who is enlightened isn't severely incomplete. You don't consider those out there beyond seeking publicity or trying to awaken others. Because those may be the true awakened ones. Trust me - once you realize you are alone - it really becomes a joke. Would you honestly trick yourself into playing God of War again, after you beat it? It wouldn't be the same. It would be going through the motions.