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@Alex bliss The avoidance of confrontation acceptance "with out getting hurt" or confrontation "with out getting" hurt". There will not be any anger resistance tension impatience irritation internally. Confronting if necessary also there wont be any suffering anger.Seemingly for others or the other person it will appear one is angry but internally one is not all doing that.one is calm.

@Matt8800 Have you heard of anyone working with the hindu goddess kali? I got those books you suggested( only halfway through magnus opus and desire so far) added alot of the energy exercises to my yoga/meditation pratices, also started adding in things from the desire trantra book which has really been resonating with me so far, as well as sprinkling in some psychedelics/canabis. Life started getting interesting pretty quick. I have always loved hindu philosphy/yoga and such but I dont know thing about their whole pantheon of gods, the only two whose names I could've recalled was ganesh and shiva. I decieded to smoke some strong canabis and then try some energy work after I was feeling pretty comfortable with it but I went into a energy overlord that was vastly more then I was able to store fast enough and totally overwhelmed me somewhere between obliteration and bliss it wasnt just my energy it felt infused with a some other element and I started mentally hearing Kali ma totally out of the blue and I had no clue what the hell it meant but it was a pretty personal and powerful, even afterwards scouring my mind the closest thing I could think of about kali was rembering it chanted by a cult in a Indiana Jones film as a kid didnt know it was a hindu goddess until I googled it. Was fascinated but didnt think to much about it for a few days but I kept getting flood of little synchronicities. On the weekend I decided to take some acid up camping in nature on a gorgeous day and shit got crazy. Im not even going to try to talk about that experience except that I came out the other end very devoted to a hindu goddess I barely knew jack anything about. And Ive been fairly obsessed with her since then but life is crackling alive and getting fairly psychedelic just as a baseline with constant synchronicity so Im not going to question it really. Have you come across anything about her in your research or anyone who works with her? The information from the more mainstream sources is pretty all over the place. Also curious if you have other good resources along the line of that tantra book you mentioned, I really resonate with that style. But damn you weren't joking about life getting strange, I'm shell shocked still tbh haha

The following article is directly taken from Culadasa's Dharma website. Since it is already precise and well-written, it is faster for me to just copy-paste it. All credits go to him. Enjoy! My Brief Commentary: Keep in mind that subtle dullness is a very important phenomenon you MUST understand prior to mastering samadhi. It is one of the harder roadblocks to transcend to embody greater mindfulness that leads to insights like no-self and awakening. Your understanding of how subtle dullness arises and how to experientially deal with it in meditation is essential for progression into higher stages of mindfulness. Until mastering this with stable attention and strong peripheral, consider yourself a beginner on this path. ---------------------- On Mindful Awareness vs Dullness We all know what it is like to be asleep. And most of us have had the experience at one time or another of greatly heightened awareness and alertness, such that time seems to slow down, and there is an extreme vividness and intensity to all of our sensory perceptions. This latter experience may have been accompanied by a sense of being purely a detached observer, just watching one’s own body and mind react and respond to the situation at hand. These two states define and clearly illustrate for us the range of alertness and awareness that we are each inherently capable of. The level of awareness during ordinary waking consciousness lies somewhere near the middle between these two extremes, tending in the direction of one extreme as a result of fatigue or illness or intoxication, and towards the other in times of great excitement or danger. To use the analogy of the tachometer in a car, the engine speed of the mind is normally in its middle range where the energy is in balance with performance demands made upon it. Vividness, intensity, and clarity of awareness are the manifestation of sati, of full-minded, fully conscious awareness, and the level of sati depends upon the ‘energy level’ of the mind. As the energy level of the mind diminishes, sati decreases and full-minded awareness changes to dullness. Early on in meditation practice, samatha practice especially but this happens in almost every type of meditation practice, we encounter a decrease in intensity of awareness to a level below that which characterizes the ordinary waking state. Manifesting as sleepiness, grogginess, dreaminess, this is what I call strong dullness to differentiate it from the much milder form of diminished mental energy that I call subtle dullness. I consider it to be very important to distinguish between strong and subtle dullness, because I find that otherwise many meditators will not recognize the presence of subtle dullness. So how does a meditator evaluate the level of sati that is present? She learns to recognize the different degrees of sati and dullness primarily through noticing when it has changed. When a meditator perceives the sensations of the breath with approximately the same vividness and intensity that normally characterizes tactile sensations in her daily life, she has not yet developed greater sati, but neither has she slipped into dullness. When she experiences an increased acuity of perception, as when she can see the end points of the in- and out-breaths and the pauses between with great clarity, sati has increased. The distorted perception of the sensations of the breath that accompany drowsiness are obvious dullness. Subtle dullness, though, is more difficult to recognize. A meditator in a stable state of subtle dullness will be enjoying stability of attention and good concentration. They will most likely even experience their perception of the meditation object as very clear, and thus mistake subtle dullness for increased sati. But if there is a sudden sound, as when another meditator coughs or sneezes, or some other such disturbance, two things will happen. They will feel startled and will often jerk upright, and if they are observant, they will also notice that their awareness of the meditation object is immediately sharper and clearer than it was a few moments before. It is important to notice this difference, because by noticing it one learns to distinguish between the pseudo clarity of subtle dullness and true sati. As a meditator increases in sati, it becomes more and more difficult to startle her. So why does a state of subtle dullness seem so clear, how can it be mistaken for sati? First lets look at the ‘ordinary’ level of awareness. The attention is usually moving rapidly from object to object and we are usually attending to multiple objects at once. When it is off the meditation object for long enough, then we know that the attention has shifted. When it is away more briefly and less frequently, it seems more as though we are just aware of several things at the same time. But these brief wanderings that allow us to be aware of several things at the same time are a scattering of attention that still diminishes the vividness and intensity of the primary object of attention. Now lets look at subtle dullness. As the energy level of the mind falls, the attention does not move as much, and that, of course, gives us the experience of greater stability of attention to the meditation object. It also gives us a sense of greater clarity due to less scattering of attention. But as the energy level of the mind falls, there are also many more non-perceiving moments of consciousness, more gaps in flow of the stream of consciousness than before. Thus, when the meditator is startled and the energy level of the mind jumps up a notch, there is immediately an increased acuity of awareness! This is the tip-off to the presence of subtle dullness. The wise meditator can take good advantage of these ‘startling’ disturbances in learning to distinguish sati from subtle dullness. For this reason, I recommend that meditators do not go to great lengths to create an ultra-quiet environment for meditation, do leave the telephone plugged in while you meditate, do meditate in groups that can provide the occasional cough, sneeze or snore. It can also be very helpful to meditate while going to sleep at night, and to observe the transition from wakeful alertness, through subtle dullness, strong dullness and then sleep, a transition that can occur either quickly or slowly. Learning about mindful awareness vs dullness is only one of many benefits to be derived from meditating while going to sleep (and immediately upon waking, and there are some special features to these two meditations that are a topic for another time). But anyone can benefit from simply observing the mind while observing the breath while going to sleep. Sati is increased simply by intending to be more acutely aware, and by providing the mind with perceptual challenges that require an increased level of awareness to accomplish. (Noting practice in Vipassana is an example of just such a challenge, as is following the breath with increasing attention to detail in samatha practice.) But increasing the energy level of the mind also has the effect of increasing the rate of movement of attention from object to object, so in that sense increasing sati will also decrease the stability of attention unless the meditator has achieved a skill level of directed and sustained attention sufficient to remain focused at an increased level of mental energy. For this reason, it is best for a meditator not to worry about subtle dullness at all until they have overcome mind-wandering, gross distraction, and strong dullness. Permitting some subtle dullness is helpful in overcoming mind-wandering and gross distraction in the earlier stages. There is, in fact, a delicate balancing act between increasing sati and increasing attentional stability. They must increase in tandem with each other, otherwise one goes either too far in the direction of either agitation or dullness. But once the meditator has overcome both mind-wandering and gross distraction, it is of paramount importance that she work to overcome subtle dullness. Subtle dullness will almost certainly be present at this stage because it will have been part of the means by which this stage of attentional stability has been achieved. Dullness is relative, of course, and the meditator has already cultivated some increased sati in previous stages of practice, but what we are concerned with here is any state in which the level of awareness and the energy level of the mind is definitely less than what she is capable of while sustaining this degree of concentration, and most especially we are concerned with any tendency for it to further decrease. She must learn to achieve and then to sustain this degree of attentional stability with no decrease in mindful awareness. Then she must learn to further increase mindful awareness. The latter is actually much easier than the former. Once the mind can stabilize without increasing subtle dullness, sati can be readily increased. Before I leave this topic I also want to point out that sati ordinarily has two different aspects or ‘faces’, depending upon how it is directed. We have mostly been addressing full-minded awareness as directed towards the meditation object here, but introspective awareness, or sati-sampajanna, is that same full-minded awareness directed at knowing exactly what you are doing and why you are doing it in the present moment. This aspect of sati is only present with higher levels of alertness, and that is why there is the sense of ‘awakening’ in that moment when one realizes that their mind has wandered, and also that feeling of alertness that comes with ‘checking in’ during meditation to see what kinds of distraction or dullness might be present. At the beginning of this article I called attention to naturally occuring instances of powerful sati, of greatly heightened alertness and awareness that most of us have experienced at one time or another, typically in times of emergency. You might recall my mention of the fact that this is often accompanied by a sense of being purely a detached observer, of watching one’s own body and mind react and respond to the situation as it unfolds. This is very illustrative of sati-sampajanna when the level of mental energy is very high. In the earliest stages of samatha practice, the awakening to the fact that the mind has wandered is a distinct conscious event from the engaging with the object by the wandering attention. When one knows the mind has wandered, the thought it had wandered to is already gone. Likewise, the moments of ‘checking in’ with introspective awareness in the middle stages of samatha practice are distinct conscious events from the ongoing observation of the meditation object, and as such are actually interruptions of the attention to the meditation object (although if they are brief enough the interruption may not be especially noticieable). On the other hand, with upacara samadhi the sati-sampajanna can be simultaneous with the sati directed at the meditation object. How is this possible? In the early stages of practice, the energy level of the mind is not high enough that the mind has enough ‘bandwidth’ to encompass both at once. But in the later stages, as sati becomes more and more highly developed in tandem with attentional stability, conscious awareness can be focused on the mind while the mind attends to the meditation object, not as two separate objects, but as one object (the mind) that includes the other (the sensations of the breath). This is experienced as a change in perspective, as a ‘stepping back’, as an expanded scope of single pinted awareness. It is the opposite of what one does in order to enter jhana, which is also a change in perspective but is a ‘sinking in’ instead. At times in the past I have wondered whether deep jhana could be achieved with dullness, but was never inclined to find out for myself. Jhanic absorption does not require a high level of mental energy and sati, although it is completely compatible with it. I have since heard of several instances that seems to be deep jhanas with dullness. So without the deliberate cultivation of sati, a samatha practitioner can end up sitting in pleasant states of sustained dullness, or even progress to bliss-filled absorptions. But they will be lacking in one of the essential faculties required for Insight and Enlightenment, they will be lacking an indispensible Factor of Enlightenment – Sati, full-minded, fully conscious awareness.

devilry is a contracted form of awareness, awareness is infinite therefore awakening and enlightenment is also infinite. Because non-duality is infact duality. There are infinitely many things that you can become more aware of as opposed to who am I, these are all the existential questions. You can not get away from answering them. They all must be answered and for a specific reason. You can not know the absolute truth if you do not know the absolute truth. The absolute truth is that emptiness is form, emptiness is formless emptiness is imperminance form is the same as formless and formless is the same as form At the end of answering all exestential questions, about who you are. You will find that all of these are not merely words. They are the absolute truth not only in actuality but in relativity as well because the absolute truth is the absolute truth and can not be otherwise. The point of life is to understand why it is here because without understanding why it is here... what would you actually know. Hence the self reference problem. The devil is the god himself unaware of the absolute truth due to the self reference problem of self -deceite and attachment to form. This is why buddha said that you must give up all your attachments to reach the end of enlightenment ... nirvana. If you do not know the truth. You do not know the truth and if you know the truth, it is an instant realisation. It’s not actually that shocking but it’s definitely very cool and satisfying to know why the hell im hear and what the only way to actualise your death truly is. You must take your own life with your own hands. A lot of materialist and spiritualist will think this is suicide. But what you realise is it’s very peaceful and beautiful really. It’s exactly How it should be. When your done playing outside, return home to the source. “Return to the market place” as the 10th ox herding picture says. The devil is the person who does not understand they must take their own life to truly die. The devil must die to the truth. The truth is absolute infinity and that’s who you are. The devil can not rule because the devil is imaginary. A being who is god and unconditional love for itself and free to do what ever they want and free to play however they want. Because the true self has unconditional love for the devil. The devil is unaware of himself as the devil because he doesn’t know what the absolute truth is. Therefore the devil must sacrifice himself to become god and take his own life. Because the thing the devil wants the most is to be loved by others. But he must realise at some point that the others are actually him and from there the path to reunification ... he has an awakening. But the awakening are confusing his own devilry gets in the way and the biggest obstacle the devil must face is to become godly and when he has all that temptation , love and joy and bliss he finally wanted and reAlised was the ideal. He must offer his very life for the thing he wants and that is to never have restricted form ever again. But the devil does not give in, and god is unconditionally loving. He finds a way deceive himself of the life he craved and wanted as he was suffering immensely when he joined trip so he tricked himself into thinking he had become god “the enlightened master” ... only to realise that the thing he wanted was to be free, to never have to see the former world ever again. So he devoted his whole self to completely leave his form and actualise the death he did not do before. Because he realised that what he did was imagine an idea of a spiritual path, the ideal way to prevent his own death. A last final attempt to lay his bed because he couldn’t let go and give himself up. So he came back to help and realise what he forgot. The thing he forgot was the thing he really wanted, the final thing he needed to do before he actually did it. He created the idea for others that the there was a god, a god named allah, bhraman and GOD. Then more devils came along and imagined the idea of a seperation between them and god. This idea became a core part of the path , a liberation a false freedom for the devil to enjoy. So that when his time was up he could continue to enjoy. He never learnt his lesson that in the end the thing he really wanted was to be god again. The idea of dying to enlightenment is a false death. It is the devils last dance with life. It is again the idea of dying to god imagined into existance. the idea of dying to nirvana is the actual death of the devil. His mahasamadhi date, his nirvana ... the actual death of the devil. Because YOU never absolute truth. The absolute truth is that you are god and you imagined all of this for yourself out of unconditional love to enjoy life and indulge in life, until you realise it won’t make you happy. The reason why seekers get trapped in false death is because they seek liberation from suffering. Even if they don’t admit it to themselves, their akashik karma can’t lie. When you pursue truth genuinely for the sake of perusing truth you arrive at the absolute truth and freedom from bondage. When he actually dies he realises he was never alive in the first place. But some can not take his so they created the false death. Because they did not go straight into death themselves and decided to come back and teach. Which is itself part of the journey for some. Buddha didn’t have the courage to take his own life. So he came back and chilled and decided to teach after. The devil is a devil until the day of his actual death. this is the story of the devil. Unconditional free will, is the free will that it is the devil himself that must take his own life. No amount of physical deaths will let him die. This is free will to live life as much as you need before returning back to source

Max only exists as an idea in your mind now, for now is all that exists! Just kidding. Existential humor can be healing during times of sadness =) My childhood dog died when I was 18. She came into my life at age 10. At the time, she was my best friend. I had never cried so much in my life. My ability to maintain peace of mind has since improved greatly. I exist so presently, I cannot really miss anything from before, as infinity is laid out so infinitely and beautifully before me at all times. This ability to "make peace" or "cope" stems from appreciation and gratitude of what is, the present moment, now. If Max comes into your consciousness, dwell not on how sad it is that he is gone, but how great it is that he was (and still is, if you imagine him). Gratitude is the antidote to any suffering. I am now in a state of consciousness where nothing can harm me, because regardless of circumstances, I am grateful for the colors, I appreciate the sounds, any memory is welcome and appreciated... at the most fundamental level, I am grateful to be. There is no greater bliss beyond that. It has been said that "the truth will set you free." It is true. Whenever the shadows of sadness and depression appear, become conscious of truth, and the light will wash away the darkness. Have gratitude for being. Cheers =)

Your shadow reeks. Please get it checked out. Lol if you’re gonna use the suffering I deal with in life as some sort of pull to win something all because your tits are in a tussle because I’m not putting up with your fantasies and projections that just shows how ignorant and selfish you still are. If you don’t like the questions I have on here then skidaddle. You’re on my post buddy. Bliss isn’t something you find but you can keep lying to others and yourself if you still want to. If you’re really gonna use someone’s vulnerability about their life as a way to have a one-up on them because you can’t just agree to disagree, admit your ignorance, or just walk away that shows how much you’re in your own spiritual narcissism. You ain’t awake buddy. Nor am I. Keep typing like a spiritual keyboard jockey if you want but keep your fantasies and projections you have of me to yourself. I dont not need to indulge your fantasies nor play coy.

@kieranperez Well, you're the one who's suffering, not me. I've found bliss, and was trying to point you to it. I can't help you if you don't want to help yourself. Keep on mentally masturbating, and you will get nowhere.

Yes the truth , what more could you want ? It’s in the name, “the absolute truth” and then from gaining the absolute truth You get to die instead of being reincarnated again these are the two things you get the absolute truth includes - all knowledge about why you built reality this way - all knowledge bout how you built reality this way and why it can’t be otherwise - all exestential answers answered - the truth about enlightenment - the absolute truth - safety in grounding your reality until you decide to consciously die - no doubts what so ever about the absolute truth under any circumstances - reflection of other people’s reality so you can understand them and appreciate them for who they are when they are talking About Absolute truth, this understanding does not pertain to non spiritual people. For this you will need spiral dynamics and experience in each section to relate. - you don’t Critise people unless they are talking about absolute infinity. Because that’s is the only occasion when there is a wrong because the absolute truth itself is dualistic. Because life itself is dualistic. There’s nothing that can get passed you at this stage, but this doesn’t apply to people above you who are trying to reach nirvana. They will correct you and your devilry. This will happen until the death of your awareness to understand the absolute truth you must accept the death of your awareness. This is the key otherwise you are imagining your own reality. The absolute truth is what ever it is. It’s not for you to make judgements and Critism about because you can not anyone because it will always fall into imagination and delusion. The word the absolute truth is a delusion or illusion. What it is pointing to is the only thing that exists and has ever existed for eternity and will ever exists. And that is you. i am pointing you to the steps of the door. First reach the steps (become enlightened and then unenlightened) and then you must walk up the steps and begin the process (losing your awareness in no mind) and then You must wait for the grace of god to grant you nirvana. It is not something you can attain. To attain something is to have something and for there to be something to be attained. What you attain is death in the form of nothing/ emptiness / love / bliss / peace / freedom .. what ever god like qualities you can use to talk about whatnot “freedom” means to you. It is “freedom” to you and that’s why we seek. We seek freedom from our bondage. Some seek the knowledge of freedom, some seek the love of the divine, some seek for the end of their reincarnation and bliss, some seek for devotion to god. What ever the path was does not matter at the steps. You must sit in no mind, without your focus. But you can not do this without a quite mind and therefore you need all exestential questions answering. Only the one who knows Absolute truth can become fully enlightened. This is what buddha meant when the 2nd fetta said, trust the buddha he reached full enlightenment. In those 30 days of sitting in the trees. He was graced by god. And when you find the absolute truth you realise the buddha was you, the god blessing was you. God is not other than you, there is no near to fear, you will be in safe hands. You must offer life for death and you must offer life for the absolute truth. Period

@Alex bliss proof cannot be found via words, stories, pictures, examples. All proof given to you will be of those forms. The proof you need has to be direct and self confirming. Like knowing you were dreaming is only possible after you wake up from it... No "proof" can be given to you while you are dreaming. You must get the proof directly for yourself

@Nahm devilry is a contracted form of awareness, awareness is infinite therefore awakening and enlightenment is also infinite. Because non-duality is infact duality. There are infinitely many things that you can become more aware of as opposed to who am I, these are all the existential questions. You can not get away from answering them. They all must be answered and for a specific reason. You can not know the absolute truth if you do not know the absolute truth. The absolute truth is that emptiness is form, emptiness is formless emptiness is imperminance form is the same as formless and formless is the same as form At the end of answering all exestential questions, about who you are. You will find that all of these are not merely words. They are the absolute truth not only in actuality but in relativity as well because the absolute truth is the absolute truth and can not be otherwise. The point of life is to understand why it is here because without understanding why it is here... what would you actually know. Hence the self reference problem. The devil is the god himself unaware of the absolute truth due to the self reference problem of self -deceite and attachment to form. This is why buddha said that you must give up all your attachments to reach the end of enlightenment ... nirvana. If you do not know the truth. You do not know the truth and if you know the truth, it is an instant realisation. It’s not actually that shocking but it’s definitely very cool and satisfying to know why the hell im hear and what the only way to actualise your death truly is. You must take your own life with your own hands. A lot of materialist and spiritualist will think this is suicide. But what you realise is it’s very peaceful and beautiful really. It’s exactly How it should be. When your done playing outside, return home to the source. “Return to the market place” as the 10th ox herding picture says. The devil is the person who does not understand they must take their own life to truly die. The devil must die to the truth. The truth is absolute infinity and that’s who you are. The devil can not rule because the devil is imaginary. A being who is god and unconditional love for itself and free to do what ever they want and free to play however they want. Because the true self has unconditional love for the devil. The devil is unaware of himself as the devil because he doesn’t know what the absolute truth is. Therefore the devil must sacrifice himself to become god and take his own life. Because the thing the devil wants the most is to be loved by others. But he must realise at some point that the others are actually him and from there the path to reunification ... he has an awakening. But the awakening are confusing his own devilry gets in the way and the biggest obstacle the devil must face is to become godly and when he has all that temptation , love and joy and bliss he finally wanted and reAlised was the ideal. He must offer his very life for the thing he wants and that is to never have restricted form ever again. But the devil does not give in, and god is unconditionally loving. He finds a way deceive himself of the life he craved and wanted as he was suffering immensely when he joined trip so he tricked himself into thinking he had become god “the enlightened master” ... only to realise that the thing he wanted was to be free, to never have to see the former world ever again. So he devoted his whole self to completely leave his form and actualise the death he did not do before. Because he realised that what he did was imagine an idea of a spiritual path, the ideal way to prevent his own death. A last final attempt to lay his bed because he couldn’t let go and give himself up. So he came back to help and realise what he forgot. The thing he forgot was the thing he really wanted, the final thing he needed to do before he actually did it. He created the idea for others that the there was a god, a god named allah, bhraman and GOD. Then more devils came along and imagined the idea of a seperation between them and god. This idea became a core part of the path , a liberation a false freedom for the devil to enjoy. So that when his time was up he could continue to enjoy. He never learnt his lesson that in the end the thing he really wanted was to be god again. The idea of dying to enlightenment is a false death. It is the devils last dance with life. It is again the idea of dying to god imagined into existance. the idea of dying to nirvana is the actual death of the devil. His mahasamadhi date, his nirvana ... the actual death of the devil. Because YOU never absolute truth. The absolute truth is that you are god and you imagined all of this for yourself out of unconditional love to enjoy life and indulge in life, until you realise it won’t make you happy. The reason why seekers get trapped in false death is because they seek liberation from suffering. Even if they don’t admit it to themselves, their akashik karma can’t lie. When you pursue truth genuinely for the sake of perusing truth you arrive at the absolute truth and freedom from bondage. When he actually dies he realises he was never alive in the first place. But some can not take his so they created the false death. Because they did not go straight into death themselves and decided to come back and teach. Which is itself part of the journey for some. Buddha didn’t have the courage to take his own life. So he came back and chilled and decided to teach after. The devil is a devil until the day of his actual death. this is the story of the devil.

Yes this is the conclusion I come to when I close my eyes. Although we are going to have communication issues, it’s some form of wave current Let me phrase this sound current in the best way I can transcendental vibratory current going left to right in bliss like feeling You are correct, my being has been scoping and sizing up masters for a year now. I have understood from early how this process works, you can only have a master who you resonate with as far as your own awareness can see. So let’s take Leo for example the reason why I resonate with him was because he saw the big picture to truth. So yeah I get what your trying to say with the whole master thing. I have two comments ideally I was trying to ignore having masters because ashrams are not my style, I needed to solve my understanding of truth first. However the plan was after understanding was completed (relative) , to do it on my own. But the problem still remained ... how... so why can I not become a master on my own myself ? Does karma prevent this completely ? It is a must to seek out a master secondly this masters you had in mind for me, his surname is not Khan right ? Because I already know of him. In Hinduism we call it connecting with the om sound. This is the purpose of mantras. To reach that place thats even if we’re talking about the same thing lol I have a 0.0000000000000001% chance of being right here. Reoccurring to infinity.

@zeroISinfinity your “spirit inside of body” will not go anywhere. It will die. Because it NEVER WAS. This is the part your not understanding about THIS THIS ONLY EXISTS BECAUSE YOU STILL EXISTS. No bliss, no love, no joy, no happiness , no peace , no -thing -ness, emptiness, allah, bhraman , void, just words to talk about it. “Al fana al fana” the passing away of passing away “nirvana” “mahasamadhi/ moksha- freedom from bondage” “absolute truth” “Groundless” To become truth you must die to become it. You can not attain nirvana / moksha/ emptiness. To attain it is to not attain it. To be it is to not be it. THERE IS NO YOU, YOU DONT EXIST , DEVIL only YOU exists and that is your true self after you die.

Nothing to forgive man. You are wonderful. And I apologize again for what I said. It was too much. Is it still a joke when an enraged axeman comes to kill your mother because you made an inappropriate remark? It is not about being a serious teacher. It is about using the mind you've been blessed with instead of being a bliss junkie . Love you too! Meditation is incredibly important!

@OBEler i barely experience any bliss which sometimes makes me question if this is really kundulini

@khalifa "The Die-offs/dark nights are a “biochemical process” which secondarily brings about the dissolution of the operational personality structure for “a period of time”. The brain is undergoing such a catastrophic neurological meltdown and renewal, that the ego personality and functionality is temporarily completely non operational. Depending on ones inner resources at the time and whether one is essentially imbued with a biological faith or has a tendency to fear, depression and self-hatred—this will determine whether the incapacitation is navigated positively or simply adds to the burden of an already diffcult life. The psychologicalemotional story one gives to interpret this autogenic “biological” event, is secondary to the chemistry, and yet is absolutely key to whether one can use the down cycles to further ones spiritual growth, or simply cause an escalation of our primary suffering. For every up there is a down, so it is understandable that depression might result after the over-stimulation of the brain’s pleasure centers and increase in endorphins, during the bliss of kundalini. Depression could also result as the left-brain loses its normal adaptive function during the frst few years of the major cycle. Loss of left-brain prefrontal lobe function could lead to paranoia, frustration, self-pity and other negative emotions. Kundalini restructures us to a higher order, enabling us to live a spiritual life in the material world. The Die-off’s in particular should be regarded with awe and gratitude as very good news. They don’t last long and we do not transform without them. The old must die for the new to be reborn. So the highs and lows of the kundalini cycle should be celebrated equally" From the book biology of kundalini (Jana Dixon). Best book I have found about kundalini, highly recommend this.

@Sauvik Check out the "Completion Process" by Teal Swan. It's a process described in one of her books, but she made a video on it, it should be enough. The process is tough, but it's one of the best solution I found if: you don't mind heavy sessions (I do it almost daily, so you could do it if you want) you can't/don't want to use psychedelics (psychedelics are more powerful, this is what I read in the forum) you want fast results (during one session, at the beginning of my journey with this process, I "resolved" a trauma and the day after my way of feeling in my body changed drastically. So you can see results overnight if you do the exact steps. At least this is what happened to me) you want to go to the root of the problem There still are some cons: Like I said previously, it's tough, it's physically and mentally exhausting If you want to get rid of all the trauma, you should do it various times, but it's up to you to decide how much to do it It's a bottom-up approach (it means you work with the emotions in your body), and it should be integrated with a top-down approach (therapy, psychologist, ecc.) One session could take more than 30 minutes, it depends on your wounds. Personally, when one session take too much time, I stop it and restart from there during the next session. This tool is powerful but it's not perfect. And as Teal Swan said in one video, a trauma occurred in a relationship should be healed in a relationship. This means that for some wounds you may want to heal with friends or partners. How? Setting boundaries, expressing your emotions freely, being vulnerable enough to accept the love you receive, ecc. This is the process I use the most. However there are more tools out there, and I invite you warmly to learn by yourself, and to study books and videos. You can use the tools that fit you the most. So what do you do? Use the search function in the forum and type "healing". You can find some valuable info. Practice meditation and/or Body Scans. Holotropic breathwork is a practice that can be as powerful as some psychedelics, and you only use your breath. Kriya Yoga (well, yoga in general, but Kriya is more powerful as Leo said) is said to remove emotional blockages. I read these books: The Dark Side Of Light Chasers - Debbie Ford Invincible: The 10 Lies You Learn Growing Up With Domestic Violence - Brian Martin, 2014 Emotional Blackmail - Susan Forward, Donna Frazier You can type on Google "Best books on healing" and read some of them. If you can't/don't want to buy them but still you want to read them, use libgen.io Finally, there was a post some time ago. A post about various methods of healing. It was on this forum. But I can't find it anymore. Fortunately, I copied the text, but I don't remember the user that wrote it. Here's it. Total and absolute self-love. This should be done on two levels. 1. You create something I like to call Meta acceptance. That means total and absolute acceptance of yourself in all situations. Practically this means, that whenever you are feeling down, you can accept yourself without judgement, whenever you screw up, you choose to accept yourself, but that doesn't end there. If you screw up, and beat yourself up, you choose to accept your beating yourself up! See why "meta"? The self-acceptance chain runs a little like this: You find yourself in a emotionally disturbed state. Your thoughts are among the lines of "I am not good enough". >> "Oh stop, don't think of yourself like that!". The way you apply meta acceptance is - First accept the thought of "Oh stop, don't think of yourself like that". (If you want something a little tangible for acceptance you can mentally hug the thought.), and once that thought is dealt with, you move onto the other thought of I am not good enough. And you accept that. 2. Acceptance of your body and feelings. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GcNGtZPPSS8 - Leo's visualisation works perfectly for this stage of self-love. Basically what needs to happen is the activation of your heart-center and then spreading the "love feeling" to the rest of your body. Hammer it down with a visualization! Healing is in essence an inaccurate concept. There is nothing wrong with the "unhealed" one. When you decide to take up on healing, you are choosing a different perception, different quality and embodiment of life, and different energetical configuration of your being. It is not better, nor worse, that is why we choose our suffering, as well as we choose our bliss. We choose healing because DAMN IT FEELS GOOD! (And from that standpoint only you can make an argument that the "healed" state is a better one, because it is in the direction of your intuition, which is nothing else but following what feels good). So every day, you choose to step more into the reality of a better feeling energetical state. Into the blissfulness of being. How? VISUALIIIIIZE! Let's assume that there is such you that is fully healed, fully recovered, fully on the bliss side of the emotional spectrum. The you that is passionate, alive, joyful, fearless. How exactly does the embodiment of these qualities (or any other of your choice) feel? How does it feel in your body? What kinds of thoughts are you having? What kinds of people do you hang out with? What is your financial situation? What is your family and relationship situation? What does it look like when you communicate with others? What kind of job, or what kind of person are you in a job? How assertive are you? How responsible and sensitive are you? And so on... Use the miracle that is your imagination, visualize that you are already embodying every single quality you desire to embody. Imagine that you are blissful, joyful and peaceful. Every single day, whenever you remember, just imagine this YOU! This YOU that you know you came here to be, and imagine that you are ALREADY living that paradigm. This allows you to stay motivated, make it number one priority, and will have a healing effect within of itself. And through the visualization - Allow yourself to raise your standards. Give yourself permission, that you truly deserve to feel amazing. You truly deserve to have an amazing life, you truly deserve to be the one you know you came here to be. Pranic breathing/visualization An exercise to be used whenever you feel an emotional trigger in your body. This usually happens in the stomach and abdomen area, but not exclusively. 1. Close your eyes, and make yourself aware of all the feelings in your body. Identify everything you choose to work on in the moment, anything unpleasant or limiting. 2. On a count of 6, take a deep breath INTO YOUR TUMMY!!!!!! while visualizing All the emotions rising up! 3. On a count of 6, hold onto everything you have been meaning to rise up while holding your breath. 4. On a count of 6, breathe out, while letting go of everything you have been holding onto. Then hold your breath for 3 seconds, and breathe normally for a little while (doesn't need to be more than 2-3 breaths). 5. Repeat the whole process until it feels redundant. I highly recommend doing this practice daily. Sidenote: It helps if you calm your mind before the exercise through any means you find fit. The Wim-Hof Breathing technique This is for an advanced stage of already initiated healing. I do not recommend this exercise for the initiation of the healing process. If you feel that it resonates with you and fits your needs, then by all means use it any time you deem appropriate. 1. Breathe in the full capacity of your lungs, and breathe out instantly. Repeat the whole process 25-30 times, until your head feels a little dizzy. 2. Breathe out your last breath from the previous step and hold your breath for as long as it feels comfortable. 3. Go back to n.1 and do the whole cycle again. Repeat for at least 3-5 times. LEARN TO LISTEN TO YOUR BODY This is a very simple but crucial part. Get yourself into a habit of making choices based on what feels good in your body, and you can turn your whole life into healing, making the process much quicker, and more intuitive. IN ex. you wake up, you do your morning routine, and you don't know what to do next. Move your awareness into your body, and ask yourself "what would feel the best to do next?". There might be answers such as drink a glass of water, have sex, go for a walk, masturbate, go socialize, etc. This can at times get tricky, and that is when we are presented between a dilemma of Egoic vs. Authentic choice. Imagine that you are in a restaurant, and you can either choose to eat a cake or a salad. Now there are instances, where eating the cake would actually be an authentic choice. It is completely fine. But let's say you are trying to shed some weight, and naturally eating a cake would feel good! Right?! Well Then follow this principle. Will it also feel good 5-30 minutes after I made the choice? (eaten the cake..), How to deal with negative/lack beliefs First a quick guide to make yourself aware of your limiting beliefs - Let's say there is something that disturbs you. Maybe your spouse doesn't text back and you feel bad about it. So you calm your body and mind, and start enquiring within. Why am I feeling bad about this? >> It feels like they don't love me. If that is true, why is that so bad? >> Because with no love my life is meaningless. If that is true why is that so bad? >> Because that would mean I am not good enough. If that is true why is it so bad? >> I am not good enough This was just an illustration, your enquiring process will probably be much longer and have perhaps several dozens of questions, you might check out Katie Byron's process that she calls The Work. So you've got this belief that you perceive as limiting, and decided to do something about it. Great!!! ADMIT DEFEAT. You cannot win over a belief in your subconscious from the stand-point of This is not true! I will fight this! Because in essence, your subconscious has so much more power than your conscious mind. You can't override it with brute force. So admit defeat. The belief is there. You do not believe you are good enough. After admitting the defeat there should be (there may be exceptions so don't take this as a rule or confirmation of "I am doing it right") a sense of relief. Because you have been running from this belief your entire life, trying to prove it wrong. But now, when you admit defeat, there is no longer the need to accomplish anything in order to escape from the belief. There is acceptance. There is a little more peace. Now when you are aware of your thought of "I am not good enough", trace the thought back into your body. Close your eyes, and follow the trail of your emotions. How does that thought make you feel? What are the underlying emotions behind this belief? This might take a while to take an effect, but sooner or later, you should arrive at an emotion that can be worked with. AND THAT is when your breathing exercises kick in. What should follow is a lot of release of unconscious emotions. Your most cathartic moments are the ones when you are overwhelmed with emotions. List of cathartic actions/events/situations Journaling and writing down thoughts in free association Tingeling or weird sensations in the body Speaking in tongues CRYING shouting outbursts of anger panic attacks unexplainable fear obsessive thinking unvolutary body movements strong urges (such as you have a strong urge to do something, or bark, or run,...) puking diarhea hyper horniness hyper sensitivity feelings of love feelings of resentment feeligns of disgust feelings of victimhood halucinations feeling sick feelings of stiffness and many many more :o) Desire I MUST BECOME DESIRELESS DESIRE IS THE SOURCE OF ALL SUFFERING The belief in lack is the source of all suffering. - Bentinho Massaro What do you make of this one? The belief in lack is the cause of all suffering. Is that clear? Like... do you understand how deep this goes? When you are born, you don't really believe in that much of lack do you? You prolly don't believe that you lack money as a kiddo. You probably don't believe that you lack sex, or that you lack comfort (ok debatable). But surely not as many things as you seem to be lacking now. Desire is the driving force behind all action. Without desire the universe would literally could not exist. What's the problem then? Lack based desire vs. Inspiration based desire. All of suffering is an illusion, because it is based on lack. Which IS an illusion. You can never truly lack anything. If lack were real, happiness would not be a possible state of mind. I can prove this to you! Lack is truly an extremely illusory state of consciousness. Right now, as you are sitting behind your computer screen! Are you lacking a big shiny red apple in your hand?! No? But it is not there? (unless this is a fucking huge coincidence in which case I'm highfiving you) So how can you not lack it? If it is NOT THERE! Well you don't... probably. You are not in a "state of lack of the big red shiny apple" that would be driving you crazy. So how come you can lack anything else? Like money? Or love? Or anything what so ever? Can you see the illusory state of mind? Lack cannot possibly rationally ultimately exist. Conclusion? Desire is OK! There is nothing bad/wrong/untrue about desire. The trick comes in distinguishing lack based desires and inspiration desires. To be fair, as of now, most of your desires are probably going to be lack-based. And that is fine. It is a great tool for growth and healing. How to exploit desires for growth 1. Every time you feel bad about a situation, ask yourself "What must I believe that I lack right now?" And realize that it is a one big lie. You cannot lack anything. And even if you did lack something, wouldn't the most logical thing to do be just straight up getting the thing you think you lack? Instead of reminiscing and feeling bad about it? Find out what you perceive you lack (let's use the example of companionship) "I believe I lack companionship." If it were true, that I truly lack companionship, what would be the most logical course of action? >> Go out and talk to people Ok great why don't you do it? Looads of self-sabotaging thoughts and behaviours probably will kick in. >> I don't wanna go out, people don't like me, I am shy, I am introverted, I can't make friends, I don't know anyone, I am a loser etc. See how the perceived lack was what created the suffering? It wasn't the desire itself. It was the belief that you lack companionship. 2. Every time you desire something, even when it is based on lack, follow it. Do NOT SUPPRESS YOUR DESIRES. That will truly result only in self-sabotaging and self destructive behaviours that will lead to more emotional issues down the road. Every time we desire, we don't in actuality desire the object of our desire. We desire the feeling of having the object. If I want a car, I don't actually want that car. What I truly on a deeper level want, is a state of freedom, or worthiness, or security,... Can you activate that feeling of already having that car within your being, WITHOUT actually having the car? Yes you can! Visualize, breath-work, mindfulness, breath-work. What does it feel like to have that car? What are the sensations in my body? What kinds of thoughts are coming up now when I have it? What is between me, and the feeling of having the car? Is it the feeling of "I am not good enough"? Or the thought of "I am not worthy"? Once you arrive at a conclusion, healing can start, lack can be purified, and desire will be used to it's maximum to grow you, and to teach you your lesson. side note: You can motivate yourself through realizing that once you get yourself into a state of mind where you "already have that thing you desire" without lacking it, it will be SO MUCH MORE EASIER EFFORTLESS AND FLOWING to get that thing in the external reality, that it really doesn't make any sense at all to keep believing in lack. Using your imagination This is my favorite part. Healing your inner child through imagination. This is where you can go nuts and fucking sky is the limit. This is the fun shit! And a very very easy principle so listen up. Every time you manage to tune into your inner child to feel some of its emotional needs, visualize whatever comes to mind to fulfill those needs, and build yourself a world in your head of people and circumstances that are absolutely ridiculously amazing. suggestions Bathing yourself in light and love Creating whatever guardian figure to hold you (or your inner child, depending whether you choose a separate perspective or not. (I used to use Obama a lot =D) Being in beautiful places Being praised by everyone Being cheered on by everyone Drinking healing water Releasing your emotions as demons from your body Conversations with people who have hurt you in the past with the intention of closure or forgiveness and again... go nuts, sky is the limit <3

@Truth Addict May I ask you if you are happy? And what does bliss depend on in your opinion?

@tsuki it’s not you are mixing up the scales, just because you will not suffer in this life because of your nirvana-like enlightenments / samaras / samadhi-states / awakenings / kenshos / empty states does not mean you will not suffer in your next life. Your devilry will still be rooted out eventually and you will seek death. To which you will realise why Samara and all these awarenesses mentioned above are not nirvana. You will know because you will have the feeling in your being. If you are asking for yourself why it’s okay to settle for Samara, it is because of your girlfriend and you are attached to her. Hence you can say such a statement. I have no girlfriend and the logical decision is to go for true death. What logical argument could you use to tell yourself not to go for the greatest bliss and freedom apart from something finite ? Edit: I’m not saying it’s right or wrong, merely pointing out an argument for clarification

The belief in external reality is a byproduct of your undisciplined mind. You cannot know the truth, you may only embody, realize it. The way of doing that is by using the mind to explore itself, find its limits and going beyond them. The mind creates images that can correspond with actuality and potentially be useful. The images are not the truth. Usefulness, the extent of applicability, is not the criterion here. Seek peace, bliss and happiness. When it comes to validation of the applicability of models, the scientific method is the way. In self-discovery, sincere phenomenology is useful. I think that it's important to mention that all models must be necessarily incomplete, and that incompleteness can be incorporated within them.

Ok I'll start. My first experience was frozen. Meaning it was Divine and outside of time and space. I became conscious that i was nothing. Pure awareness or Infinity. I felt the bliss of Love and pure consciousness although at the time i didn't realize it was Absolute Love. I remember experiencing the dark night of the soul. I knew that i had died. I look back now and realize that i had died and become pure consciousness. I was reborn with the knowledge that i was nothing. I was Infinity and infinity negates itself. Why? Because it has all qualities - including the quality of nothing. I was a hologram. That was my first mystical experience.

Hmmm ? I thought ignorance was bliss.

Of course you can kill yourself and become God whenever you want, no one is stopping it from you (except for people stuck in the dual and who think it is wrong) But still it is not the full answer. Duality is a a gift. It is not as boring as the nondual. That is why God decieved himself and contracted his consciousness into a person, human, or animal so he could escape himself from himself and experience the great beauty and value of a human life, the love, sorrow, hatred, jealousy, strife, suffering, bliss, gratitude of having lived as a human and having loved your loved ones, your spouse, your parents, your mother, although they are not real, but still a momentary escape to that special connection is what God wants. If you experience the non-dual while being in the dual, you can have the best of both worlds, you can have a synergestic effect. Full blown nothingness is a great thing, but living in the junction of the dual and non-dual isn't a bad experience either. And if you kill yourself again not having realized yourself, then chances are you will again decieve yourself and be reborn again into something which you intruth are actually not, and you will be running around in this duality for god knows how long untill slowly you start to question who you really are. The only reason the nondual is sought, is to take a break from the suffering of duality which might be (percieved as) unbearable. It's like in a dream a tiger is about to kill you, and awakening is like "Chill out, this is just a dream". However if you are enjoying this dream (which is the purpose of self deception, suffering is the side effect), then non-dual is useless. If in the dual you feel great because you feel like you are the most smartest, handsomest, talented etc person in the world, then nonduality destroys this dream and you are back to non duality and you go "Wow, I wish this was real. It was such a beautiful dream" Also do you see the connections between, suffering, seeking the nondual and suicide? Why do people commit suicide? To end their suffering. Why do people want a escape to the nondual? To end their suffering. Seeking nondual turns you into a God and ends suffering. Suicide turns you into a God and ends suffering. Non-dual = Suicide (of the dual) Suffering is the side effect of the pleasure of the dual. Arthur Schopenhauer used to say that humans are capable of great suffering because they are capable of great pleasure. While animals or lesser forms (which Schopenhauer calls the brutes, who live only moment to moment, suffer moment to moment and have pleasure moment to moment, contrast to that of human) can have neither or lesser of the 2, their experience is not as intense as that of the human.

Awakening can be thought of as removing ignorance. Ignorance stems from finitude (being bound by something greater), and this finitude is two-fold: First phase is about removal of mistaken beliefs about reality that cloud your perception of truth. These beliefs are created because you are bound by the ego and can't look past your identification. You only care about 'yourself' and your mind is severely limited in what it is able to consider. This 'psychological clensing' ultimately leads to the second phase - ego death. The second phase is about removal, or seeing past, the ego and finding new ways of relating with the world as you. This is when non-duality starts and is what I found to be generally referred to as 'enlightenment'. The third phase deals with the deeper limitation that stems from your 1st ignorance (egoic perception). By perceiving yourself egoically, you have contaminated your body in various ways that predispose you to certain behaviors. The process of dealing with this limitation, ignorance, is cleansing. I would imagine, this cleansing ultimately leads to physical death, probably through mahasamadhi. The reason to not kill body is dependent on the stage you're currently in. If you're still bound by the ego, then you are so ignorant that you have no idea what you're doing. Literally. As you remove your mistaken beliefs and are able to see past your ego - the life gradually improves until it literally becomes pure bliss. At that point, there is no reason whatsoever to kill yourself because this place is heaven already and you're going to see what physical death is like anyways. Not going through all of that and killing yourself outright is done out of ignorance. Killing yourself through cleansing is not something that is done out of fear, hate, suffering and so forth. It is a natural process that is lead by your desire to feel better. Obviously, I'm not physically dead, so it's a speculation on my part. It is however an extrapolation heavily grounded in experience.

I think that color representation chart is bullshit and has little to do with reality. It might be representative as a concept of a life cycle, i.e. after "green", instead of going to live in a turquoise eternal bliss, the society is taken over by red/blue barbarians, as it happened in Rome and is now happening the western Europe.

Generally, humans desire to let go of unpleasant thoughts and feelings. We want to avoid pain and we like pleasure. I've never heard of someone trying to "let go" of bliss during amazing sex. Or someone trying to let go of their curiosity, fascination and joy. The desire is to let go of things we find unpleasant. Bad habits, OCD, resentments, bad memories, anger, insecurity, fear etc. It's easy to let go of someone sneezing because it is inconsequential. Yet if a stranger walked up to you on a bus and sneezed in your face, that would be a lot harder to let go of. I'd say the most relevant aspect of letting go for humans involves attachment and identification. If there is a thought or feeling without any attachment/identification, it's no big deal. There is no desire to let go of it. A thought might arise "I'm so annoyed she hasn't texted me back yet. After all I do for her, this is how she treats me. . .". There is a ton of attachment/identification there. It's not so much getting rid of the thought - it's getting rid of the attachment/identification. If the thought occurred without attachment/identification it's no problem. There is nothing to let go of, because there is nothing being held onto. The thoughts become like bird chirps. We don't wonder how to let go of bird chirps, because we are not attached/identified with bird chirps. Bird chirps can be happening and all is well, no need to let go of anything.