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@Leo Gura When you enter non duality and let’s say the conscious defilements are removed. There remains many, many parts of you that refuse to buy into your seeing. That are self involved. Many control mechanisms, tendencies and vasanas remain. This causes a high degree of cognitive dissonance in the newly awakened person. Which can be solved by clinging onto one’s seeing and refusing to acknowledge one’s cognitive dissonance. Merely dismissing it as mind and “remaining as you are”. Which stunts further growth and does not allow for further development or you acknowledge the cognitive dissonance and the underlying issues that cause it. By doing so the first step towards embodiment begins. To simplify what I said. A being who is main aim is survival. Once he sees the dimension of nothingness and that dimension becomes a part of his experience can alleviate his survival issues merely through that seeing. By claiming I am everything. I am eternal. In a rather dishonest fashion or Going against his cravings and the easy way out he can acknowledge that which is hard to look at. That the seeing is one component. A very muddied one due to layers and layers of tension fighting it for lack of a better term.

I only had one experience of when I had a glimpse of God, it was when I took 30mg of 4aco-dmt(not sure maybe there was much more). I was dying in 10000 ways, I was trying to grasp something that I thought was me, until everything went away. It was lasting for 2 hours, but in my head I was there for eternity, my life flashed before my eyes again and again, random pictures were piercing my mind every second tons and tons of pictures in just a few seconds, I was trying with my whole might to return back to life, vomiting, crying, screaming. When I opened my eyes it was the same as when I close my eyes. I wasn't aware that all that nothingness that I was trying to get away from was me, I was everything, but it was so hard to accept that I died, and another eternity passed, until I heard a song that my friend played on the speaker, what is love by haddaway. And after several eternities I finally was like, I can't resist anymore, I just let go for the first time in my life I truly let go of something and that nothingness in which I was started to become a white light and I could feel that I was never that little me, I was everything all this time for eternity. I was getting back to seeing again with my eyes, I was in a room with no light, but when I first entered the room it was a bright day, and I was lying under the bed, I don't know how I got there. And I left the little shack in which I was for 2.5 hours. I was thinking this it, I'm going to afterlife, heaven. But I had no physical body, no limits, I was everything. And when I entered the house in which 10 of my friends who I know 15 years, were all sitting around being weird because of psychedelics. I was for sure that this is the afterlife, I hugged everyone, even though in the eyes of some I could see fear that controls their life, all I saw was beauty and love masked as fear. Everything was love, everything. I called my mom said I love her. I understood everything that can be understood, it was love, absolute.For the next two days I was enlightened, First time I felt peace of mind. That was two years ago, that was the worst and the best experience of my liffe.

Leo doesn't recommend dissociatives due to safety reasons but he has confirmed it can be used for this work too. I was a big experimenter of dxm doing 1g doses at times. 3rd and 4th plateau doses can directly make you realize God. It helps you see through the veil that is form into the formless. It's habit forming though so proceed with caution with this substance but I think it has incredible spiritual potential. My awakening happened with 300mg dxm and 500ug lsd in which I was shown and understood consciousness and nothingness. I could see the universe arising from the formless. It was beautiful. Mind shattering. This was before I even knew of Leo and I was saying many of the stuff he said. Dxm is the vast infinite formless sea, while the lsd navigates the formed sail. Form and formless of both substances harmonizing to show the grand paradox.

Yes sure, but what will exactly happen the day your human story ends, even if it is not called death, but your story will end anyway, and what then? Nothingness, pure love, bardos with imageries that lead to another story based on the consciousnesslevel?

Mind and reality are the same thing, yet is infinite but neither exist. Nothingness, Absolute Truth, The Self, Godhead, Emptiness, etc. is infinite. Leo is not the only one saying this. Every esoteric tradition and enlightened person says the same thing. Maybe slightly different language but it’s essence is the same. This is no something Leo is just telling you.

The mind is infinite, not being. Being has no quality. The reason why the ‘whom’ question is so effective, is because it takes the mind with it. What you’re left with is nothingness.

When I first heard Leo say this, it did frighten me. This is especially the case since I deal with anxiety and depression. Ultimately, this is nothing to be concerned or confused about, and here’s why. All my life I’ve been searching for a feeling of belonging and approval. All those times have failed, because I was not being my true self. I created an ego that always felt incomplete, always needed a sense of security from “others”, always had to please them (and my ego at the same time ). I had to constantly search for that feeling of completeness from the external world. The more I couldn’t find that, the more my life went downhill. It’s impossible for the ego to ever be fully satisfied. It needs a feeling of separation and a neediness to be in control of what’s happening for it to thrive. The ego works in very sneaky ways; it’s a trickster and will confuse you far more than the statement of “you are alone in the universe”. What changed my life, so to speak, is having a few glimpses of being “alone”. That’s when I realized that what I’ve been searching for was here all along. To fully understand what Leo means by “you are alone in the universe”, you must surrender to the Truth (which is You!). Not some of your ego, not 99.999% of it, but the entire damn thing! There’s no mental answer that will satisfy this question. All questions about “you are alone in the universe” will drop into nothingness. Until then, keep on searching until you are complete and there’s no doubt that you are alone in the universe. Being alone is actually freedom, not confinement. (Btw I’m not saying that I’m enlightened at all, but it is certainly possible to get a glimpse of what he’s talking about. This on its own will motivate and inspire you.)

Rumi talks about the universal soul, about emptiness nothingness and the final reunion of the soul with its true nature which is pure love. He talks about how we were cut off from our real home just out of love for god, and gods desire to explore away of home, and that we intoxicated by his love, were so passive that we accepted the journey. The quran talks about one god that is forbidden to make a picture of, one prophet that is also forbidden to make a picture of, and thisprophet had more than 20-30 wives, even though in the quran men are "only" allowed to have 4 and women only 1. Furthermore there is alot of talk about war in the quran, about killing infidels, jews and taking their wives and so on. Islam came from the arabian peninsula and Rumi was an Iranian or Persian that at his time had almost 600 years of forced islamic rule imposed by the arab invaders. So even if Rumi is identified with Islam, at that time exactly like this time the people of Iran had no other choice than adhering to the imposed religion. And surely did Rumi not see god as anything separate from him, that is stated in the quran. The quran has a lot of laws and rules which are different from Women to Men and finally if you dont follow the book to the letter you may end up burning in hell for eternity. This is not what Rumi describes in his poems. So even if he was an Islamic mystic he surely had his own visions, and I remember he called Theologans even Hypocrites. I don't want to offend any religion, I am just stating the facts here :)))

@ardacigin I realized nothingness and just sat there and suddenly i realized that i was not looking at my feat and that i never existed. I realized no-self. I had a big panic attack. It was not permanent. Unfortunately i got back to my ego self in some few minutes. It did not stick.

Medicine 200 ug of 1P-LSD Intention I have been contemplating my fears during the last weeks, because I realized I couldn't let go completely during some previous trips and I wanted to investigate more about this and see how far I could go this time. The Trip So I prepared some food and ginger tea and took the medicine around 9 am, then I listened some music while drinking the ginger tea and then made some bilateral symmetric movements. After an hour or so, I started to feel the effects and get some visuals so I laid down on a mat, with the arms and feet fully extended. This time I used a blindfold to cover my eyes from the light, and listened to music a great part of the trip. And it got very wild pretty quick, as I started to feel the effects more strongly, I started to repeat in thoughts, I want to be your vehicle. First, I became aware how my body started vibrating, as if waves of energy were emanating out of my body and then I started to feel a lot of love, love pouring through me, expanding very fast. I can remember some thoughts I had during these moments, "I love everything and every one", "I am love", as if I could tap into the mind of God. The experience just became marvelous, I was captivated of how much love I was feeling and made me cry. I also started to ask, please show me the a way to help other beings, please help me find a path to better support this cause and the answers started to hit me very quickly, as I realized how easily some little actions from myself would help people, family, and friends in need enormously. I also realized how unconscious I am, always spending money on things I don't really need, instead of using it for the greater good of other beings. I realized how the ego just cares of its own agenda and I became very clear to me how I am doing this every moment. I also realized how incredible life is, how incredible and sacred is every moment, every instant of my life, regardless of how banal/superficial the ego wants to make me believe it is. Understanding this made me feel a some how sad, as I realized that most of my daily activities are very unconscious and I got the feeling that I have been wasting my life most of the time. And as these realizations started to come to me, I started to cry, I cried a lot, and purged a lot of pain. It is as if I was overwhelmed from some much beauty and such a great feeling of love, it also felt very sacred. At some point, I felt I wanted to let all the suffering stuck in the universe flow through my body, like the suffering from all those beings that have died in great pain without being able to express it, to let it go. There are some parts of the trips that I find hard to recall, specially during the first hours of the trip, when the effect of the medicine is very intense, and although during that moment everything appears to make perfectly sense, I also know that once I come down from this hyper-consciousness state I will have remembering/understanding what I have been experiencing. There was a moment when I was going through an infinite process of dying and being reborn, like a purification process. As this happened, I started to connect all the suffering that was flowing through me with my own personal history, some very old pain and memories I had buried very deep in my body and unconscious. I could remember some moments when I was two or three years old and I just wanted to spend some time with my father but during this period he had to work a lot, so sometimes I could only see him for some minutes during the day before he had to go to work again. Realizing and accepting that I could not bring back this time anymore, regardless of what I have always tried to do was very painful. Allowing myself to feel this pain was so hard that I ended up crying in a fetal position. There was a moment when I started to feel a lot of physical pain/sore in my body, and doing some Hatha Yoga helped me clear the soreness. This very intense process lasted around six-seven hours but for me it felt like an infinity. After the ego started to reassemble, I started to get hungry. As I was eating something I also started to understand how I could convert this suffering and pain into love. Later during the day I spoke with my parents and had a great talk with them, I could express a lot of feelings and talk with them about situations that until now I had not been able to do, it was so nice and emotive that for some moments we cried together. As I become more and more conscious I also enjoy more to talk and spend time with them. My guess is that I able to see them and accept them for who they truly are. I then finished the day with a long walk in the forest, which help me start recalling the trip and all the realizations I had. As I become more aware I also enjoy to be in more in contact with nature, it feels so satisfying just being there. By the end of the day I was in a very blissful and peaceful state, my body felt very relaxed, as if I had released a very big load. I also had some interesting experiences that I just can not understand: One was, as I was looking on the mat look at the ceiling, I could literally see how the reality was being created in front of me in real time, as if some blocks where continuously assembling the room where I was, and in some parts there was just nothing at all. Another one is as I am looking at my hand looks, which seems to be created by very high vibrations, I lose the sensation that I am seeing at my hand, I lose al the boundaries of myself and it appears to be as if I where seeing just an image on a TV screen and then everything dissolves into nothingness. As I was writing some notes, it felt as if somebody else was writing through my body and I was just watching and then something/someone whispers me into the ear how to finish the sentence and then everything melts down, into nothingness. Conclusions I really enjoyed listening to music during the trip, it was as if the music was made exactly for the moment and it gives me the impression that it helped me let go easier into the experience and kept me on track, but I am not so sure about the blindfold, maybe I could have gone deeper without it. There are so many things that one experiences during a trip that are impossible to put in words. I wish I really could tell you the magnitude of the awakening I had, it felt several orders of magnitude greater than the previous trips. Now I can understand how each awakening always feels to be the greatest one. During this process of dying and being reborn I feel that I my consciousness grew a lot. I can not remember when was the last time I cried so much and could let go of so many pain. I could understand that love is the cause of everything, of every intention in every thing and that we are always looking for love. This gave me so much clarity, which led me to understand how my parents always tried to give me as much love as they could, from their own perspective. I could understand how the present moment is all we have, and how powerful it is to bring purpose into reality. I definitively see the benefit of contemplating, something I have not done for the previous trips. I see how powerful it is combined with the psychedelic experience and the daily practice of Kriya Yoga and meditation, which are bringing me some great gains. Questions I wish I could retain more clearly all the experience/insights I get during the trip. As I am tripping sometimes I write/record some brief notes but I find it very hard just to write or say something and I prefer not to do it a lot to get too distracted. I guess there are no special recipes but any advice is welcomed. Could it be the nature of the psychedelic (LSD)? Thanks a lot if you made it so far, I always try to write the report as brief as I can but it always ends up being long Thank you for your comments, I appreciate all of them and of course, thanks to Leo for his awesome work and the great community of Actualized.org!

@Vagos as someone who got off 6 different psych meds all at once - DONT DO THAT! I seriously got lucky and don’t know how that time around I had no withdrawal - I really do commend your plan. Honestly similar to me. Granted, it’s only been 4 months so I imagine you haven’t built any sort of long term tolerance. Get off them while you can and in whatever way works best for you. I was on 17 years of Adderall and also a whole lot of different SSRIs, mood stabilizers, and even some tranquilizers. Speaking from experience, side effects and downsides of these drugs tend to happen through long term prescription. In the beginning, it can honestly be scary how well certain psych meds work. You think your life is transformed from here on out. It’s kinda like how one feels when having a very cosmic nondual seeming experience (I use “experience” deliberately). You could never fathom how you could possibly fall back. The problem is when time passes by. You will (likely) fall back into old tendencies but now you will have a physiological addiction that can be very hard to not only break but recover from. Honesty, since getting off Adderall, my body, energy levels, cognition, is not the same at all. It’s kinda like a woman after pregnancy. Once she liked sushi. Now she barfs at the smell of it. As far as enlightenment goes, I will tell you, as Ive had glimpses of truth (or as you term it - enlightement experiences) happen to me while on 6 different meds at the same time while even being a total state of utter depression. Granted, once I let go I wasn’t upset (not that I had any context for what I realized) but understand, enlightenment is true and you are actually aware of it in a certain sense right now already. Be careful with how you interpret this but in certain senseX and maybe this is just me, I’ve found mental health issues drive me further and further into disidentification because you are in sense disassociating with everthing that’s arising and is seemingly being experienced including the very sense of being a self or a perceived or a witness or an ego. Enlightenment is true regardless of the condition or state of experience. Nothingness doesn’t change.

Good to hear, you agree. I was kind of worried about bashing the ego too much of trying to make sense and meaning out of a dream. So what is your stance about it when someone says, it is just the ego trying to hold on to a "belief" or a concept and that it all collapses into nothingness anyway. Maybe nothingness is the Fundamental, but the beliefs our egos have, they surely are trying to solve the mystery of life on earth after all or is this also just a concept and narrrative the ego creates? At the end the ego and the mind are also not separate of God, they are god too and God would need an ego to solve its own mysteries? Can it be that God is so mysterious and doesn't even know its own mysteries and needs to go and find out? And how does this mysterous force (be it god creating mysteries) create the mystery of each specific life and the whole world, in our case the earth now? Does god want to learn something in addition to its infinite knowledge? If god incarnates itself into an innocent young boy that is raised by an abusive alcoholic father in a ghetto, surely god cannot just pretend to simply "be" but he is having a challenging life whixh could be a mystery in why such situation occured. Maybe its for god to learn something in addition. Another good mystery to be solved indeed is the origins of the human beings. How did we come here on earth? Ancient texts say it was through ET inteligence. I mean why? What did God think of this mysterious mixture of Et and why do these ET not have contact with us. The darwin theory was so much more smooth to believe and not mysterious at all

@mandyjw I use different terminology but I have basically first done the heroes journey (awakening to nothingness) and now am making the grail path (perhaps you could call it a chakra cleansing or bodily awakening). I have heard about people doing it the other way around so I think it's legit. What has your path looked like?

For me liberation is staying as Nothingness forever with no distinctions. Who needs maya filled with devils. Devils rewarded Angels fucked up and destroyed.

@ajasatya Some Clarification. You as person do not die it only appears that way. Since you Are Conciousness it only change apparent state from Awareness/Dream of how it is not to be God/Vacation/me and world that Thing collapses into Pure Void/Nothingness/Infinite Potential Vortex/Infinite Love. So very much God realization/Enlightenment is death before death. Do not wish to lie People, For enlightenment you will experence death of your Awareness and it feels that way.

What I mean by that comparison isn’t so much related to the paranormal stuff he can do, although you can read accounts of the miracles he’s worked that equate to the stories of Christ and Buddha (and many others - those are just mainstream examples) - and yes I mean the ones people may think are impossible. I leave that out because you can meet many other yogis in India who can perform those sorts of miracles (and that doesn’t make them enlightened - siddhis have nothing to do with enlightenment nor are they only possible from enlightenment). When I make a statement saying he is a modern equivalent to Buddha or Christ, what I’m saying is the level of mastery it takes (and it took 3 lifetimes for him) to take these teachings to the world in the way that he’s doing and with the responsibility and integrity that he’s doing it with. When I say “the level of mastery”, don’t confuse that to “levels of enlightenment” because enlightenment is devoid of levels. The Truth, God, or Godhead, Emptiness, The Self, Nothingness, etc. is devoid of any qualities, much less conceptual levels or stages. As said by Zen masters “there are no masters of Zen.” The question is how much purification is done on the person on an emotional level, energetic level, moral level, etc. The way he is as a person and what he’s doing is just a more cognitively, conceptually, intellectually advanced version of those like Muhammad, Buddha, Christ, Mahavira, etc. Again, you can meet people today who can do the things Buddha, Christ, etc. did and even are similar as a person. But how developed are they in their cognition, values, etc.? Not that developed relative to the modern day believe it or not.

So there is no such thing as causation, merely that universal consciousness decided to make it look that way? Each moment, Willed into being from scratch, not building on previous occurrence but always deciding anew to Be? 'Exist' as defined by the way we use it to describe the existence of other people in other countries we aren't in right now. I was debating this with my dad who has had mystical experiences himself and he cant wrap his mind around the fact that there is only now. He keeps saying but what about the scars I have on my arm? And he loves to disagree with the idea of nothingness too lol. @Nahm If you made a reality out of magic, the only thing you would not be able to isolate, is magic. (thanks, love this)

If you're just stuck in a mental loop of thoughts and going exponentially exhausted/crazy, you could try to "lose yourself" in some videos. Unlike video games, which are interactive, watching something requires very little input, interaction and energy from you, but at the same time it can catch all of your attention. - And yes, I get why you want to come back, this "mundane" physical reality might not seem as colorful as a successful deep DMT trip in the beginning. But physicality, consistency, limitations and the illusion of time are a few of the greatest aspects of creation. In "DMT-land" you are shown raw pure creation coming out of nothingness with infinite potential to be anything, constantly flowing into infinite new possibilities. But the consistency of this universe is one of the most magical and beautiful parts of it, it gives creation an opportunity to make tiny stories with meaning for deeper entertainment. You can see a tree on a hill, take your time to walk over, have even more time to touch and feel every single leaf. Have children and watch them grow and experience with the story of them being the same being. Create worlds with trillions of cogs and beings interacting with each other. Existence being a gallery, the limitations of this universe gives us the opportunity to create a type of art only possible through this separation and limitation. Hopefully you are not so out of your mind from exhaustion that you can't finish reading a sentence without forgetting what the beginning of it was

What i seemed to notice once on an LSD trip was that my sense of self was being created directly out of fear, and that fear had a tension within the physical body that was associated with it. As i came down i noticed how, like an onion, from an experience of almost nothingness, layers of tension stacked on to one another. First came the fear of death, which became the self, then i noticed another wave of tension be created which created desire. What I'm now having trouble doing is letting go of all the tension that is associated with those things, because it seemed that just being able to rid the tension associated physically would allow it to contract and disappear. How can i effectively reduce all tensions within sensory experience and the physical body?

The true question is not whether there is choice, the true question is what choice is. Choice must be causeless and thus choice must originate from a causeless cause. The causeless cause is god, the nothingness, or infinite potential, which manifests potentiality/nothigness into actuality/limitation. The ego is a cause, caused by the causeless cause. There is no control in choice, there can be no control in choice, because to control would be to limit, and to limit would be to not be a choice. Choice is free will, and free will is not controlled by anyone, certainly not what you call the structure of identification operating in mind. Free will is defined by it's freedom, it is defined by the causeless cause. So the answer is no. You do not make choices, because the making of choice would mean the causing of a cause. Choice is causeless, it directly connected to Nothingness. Therefore, choices are not made, choices are the nature of the way actuality manifests itself into limited being. A choice is the opposite of control, the opposite of ego, the opposite of limitation. A choice is love. All of manifestation has it's root in choice, and thus a root in love. All this non-sense of making choices are egos claiming to be the cause of existence itself. The cause of existence is pure love, not ego. If you make a choice, you are the cause of the choice. The reality is that it is the other way around. You are caused by the choice! The choice has no cause. Don't believe me, just look at it. It's utterly obvious.

I am going to ape Leo here, so Leo said in a few videos actually that God made Himself and you can become conscious of it. That is how powerful infinite intelligence is and is one of God's or the absolutes facets. Nothing is what made God or there is nothing before God as i understand it, so nothingness is God but not the nothingness that you think of.

I think both perspectives may be correct. The Absolute as absolute nothingness, from which all concepts arise, including love. The Truth prior to all concepts. Or the other perspective, the Absolute as nothing and everything at once, creation as Love. "Wisdom is knowing I am nothing, Love is knowing I am everything, and between the two my life moves."

@Mikael89 nothingness is like 20% of the truth. So i mean yeah he's 100% of that 20% truth is the most radical thing because of self-deception.

Basically its inescapable, nothingness still resides inside of the real truth because it need it's own molecule to run reality. Hence all positions are relative, however, they're false equivalencies. so realistically there is no difference between nothingness and something -ness. Its what ever reality you design for yourself. Not as an individual, you are existing among other individuals, who also belong to the same design. you can only understand "god" through understanding paradox's. The only possible truths that exist for all of us. Which includes nothingness and somethingness as one of them. Which can only be done after becoming nothingness, in some enlightenment experience. its total for all of us. the fact its total in our whole reality makes it believable that it's completely total. and so forth. so why is there still a difference in totality for some enlightened beings and not other the answer is: paradox's. creating a frame work for paradox's puts us all in the same place. because it equalises our direct experiences, to then do scientific research for subjective experiences. interesting lol. because absolutes are true under all circumstances, its tricky, countering self-deception with self-deception

That's right, enlightenment is generally not useful. Enlightenment is the transcendence of survival, value, right/wrong, meaning, usefulness, etc. That's also right. Love is ultimately where all this no-self business leads. Absolute Self Love is the end result of profound enlightenment. If you were truly able to Self-Love, you'd conquer every demon in the world. - - - - - - - - - The realization of no-self is very important. It doesn't contradict Self Love. These are two sides of the same coin. So don't turn this into a false choice. Realize no-self. Realize The Self. Realize God. Realize Love. Realize Infinity. Realize Nothingness. Then you will be ready to save the world.