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I studied the etymology of the word and i'm convinced it means "One's own self". I don't believe in God as an all powerful entity that stands outside of consciousness and lords over it. Short answer: No. Thank you. I won't be here for long though 1. 25 2. Surrender. Just consume yourself with the desire to awaken. 3. I don't know fore certain. A few years, but I do believe I've put in the work in a past life. 4. A symptom of depression or deep dissatisfaction with life. Don't waste your time on nonsense. The point behind these Koans are to get your brain to be quiet, not finding and actual answer to them. Well someone told me how they had realized how everything they feel and sense happens within their space of consciousness and that flicked the switch in my brain. It's as if it was an activation phrase. Mind you, I had several spiritual experiences before this and so I had already begun to "get it" so to speak, but hearing that from another person just started a wholly automatic process. What happened was that my sense of being a person collapsed, and the consciousness which I thought was trapped in my head prior revealed itself to actually be infinite. The part about teachers being incapable of pointing it out to you is a bit of a lie. At the very least its exaggerated. That thing that they are pointing out is "you", literally ie. your direct experience. You don't need a sign to show you your direct experience. You are already keenly aware (for example your direct experience right now is one of reading these words). So then you need to get a sense of what you identify as yourself vs. not yourself (which for a typical person is defined by the boundaries of their body). Once you have that sense of what you believe is yourself vs. other, try this practice: Imagine that all around your body is an invisible field of peace and bliss. Try and surrender to that by giving in. Imagine you are expanding out of your skin to merge with that field. The obstacle will be the thoughts in your head trying to bring you back in your body. Whenever that happens, just kill the thought from the get go (clear your head) and resume. The intensity of your desire will determine your chance of success. They are all appearances within consciousness. They lose their edge so to speak. They won't bother you anymore. Yes there is. I am aware of my own past lives. When an ignorant person dies, their memories and tendencies construct a new "life" to be experienced anew. It's different for an enlightened person. For some people who awaken there is a deep desire to share the extreme joy they feel inside with others. The language used (the enlightened master vs ignorant pupil) is completely retarded from the master's point of view, but they usually roll with it due to various reasons - mostly convenience. There is quality control but it's not available to a student outside of how peaceful they feel in presence of a teacher, but even that is not good enough because people with expertise at making you feel at lease exist who have evil intentions. If you can see auras, a guru will have a pure white or blue colored-aura. There is really no such thing as partial awakening. You either get it or you don't. You might have many different realizations, but if it's not self-realization then it's not. After awakening your consciousness continues to expand infinitely. Some people also begin to develop certain abilities and powers. None of that means that new steps have been made in "deepening" one's enlightenment, though the experience becomes nicer as time passes. The actual next-step for an enlightened person happens at the moment of the body's death. The above also relates to you. The liberation you'll feel from the moment of self-realization until your death is already satisfactory enough. You won't go yearn for more, but "moksha" happens when the body dies and consciousness manages to not lose itself. When that occurs you evolve from having to need bodily incarnation to experience or enact changes to something beyond. The crossing point is the losing of one's belief that they exist inside a body, experiencing the outside world as an individual. The experience is always internal (it happens to you, by you, for you, and to you). There is no outside or inside.

Great and amazing - yes sometimes. Other times life is just a pain when I'm resisting what needs to be done. But I'm in a place where I can feel the deeper sense of ease, effortlessness, a gentle bliss beneath my surface layer of turbulence (amazing and horrible). You're right there's wisdom in changing what needs to be changed. Also wisdom in not changing anything, infinite acceptance. Relative truth is just as important as absolute truth.

Set and Setting I meditated for two hours that day. I had two good sessions: very focused and quiet mind. I entered the mushroom session with a clear intent: Contemplating about what I can do to heal or strengthen my body – I have to deal with a very rare genetic disease called FSHD 1, which causes muscle loss mainly in the upper body and is uncurable from the perspective of western medicine. Right before the mushroom session I did some breathing exercises. Before a trip I’m always nervous and this helps me to get the right focus. I did the session at a friend’s house, who also took 2,5 gr. He made sort of a tea with homegrown psilocybe cubensis. Upcoming Normally when I consume mushrooms as a tea, they kick in like hell. I had a 3,5 gr. trip, where after 10 minutes my head was so quiet, that I thought time had stopped – after 15 minutes everything was covered with strange patterns. But this time the upcoming was a lot slower, the mushrooms started to kick in after 50 minutes. I felt a lot of energy, my mind going quieter and a broadening of my perspective. I had some trouble to focus on my contemplation object, but somehow I got along. Darkness I was lying on a couch looking at the ceiling. Suddenly the ceiling turned into a dark moving substance, that seemed to move towards me. This is where the trip gets a bit creepy. I saw that a black tube is attached to my body going up to the dark substance. My first ‘thought’ was, that this is some kind of a spirit attack, because it felt like the dark substance is sucking energy out of my body. My second ‘thought’ was, that this dark spirit/being is stealing my energy and causing my disease. Strangely I felt rather strong in that situation and commanded the darkness to leave. A second later I was amazed that the dark substance actually withdrew. A few moments after the withdrawal I had the epiphany, that what I saw and felt wasn’t some kind of an attack, but rather a prenatal memory: me in the womb of my mother. However as far as I can remember I had also some ‘insights’ about my ancestors being haunted by dark spirits. Unfortunately I can’t remember a lot I experienced in this part of the trip – or maybe I just repressed it. Light After the darkness vanished, the light began to rise. I was ‘called’ by this light or beings of light. I got up from the couch and sat on the floor folding my hand as you do when praying and stayed in this position for over half an hour – normally I never pray. At some point my friend asked me, if everything is good and I replied yes, it is just too good. I don’t like the word ‘god’, I prefer universe, consciousness, infinity etc., but what I felt during this time, can best be described as being ‘touched by the love/grace of god’. A bath in an infinite sea of pure bliss and ecstasy. I remember being shocked and irritated because of the intensity, but at the same time I knew that there is a LOT more. Conclusion As much as I appreciated the second part of the trip, I am confused about the first one. Was the dark substance a visualization of my disease – a metaphor –, a prenatal memory or indeed some kind of a spirit attack – is an attack under these circumstances possible at all? During the trip my intuition told me that the spirit attack was real, but after the come down this seems like a big delusion and my mind making up a strange story. Have you experienced similar things while taking psychedelics? What would be your Interpretation?

This is an important part of my spiritual training where my experiential understandings of these elements on this path are rapidly improving. All 4 of these elements - equanimity, tranquility, happiness and joy - are inter-related but highly distinct lines of development. A meditator eventually needs to develop these skills to a very high level and integrate all of them to their lives deeply before insights into different facets of awakening can arise. Especially love = consciousness will be 100 times easier if you develop these Samatha factors. To do that, you need to understand what skills you need to develop. Let's define these terms first. Happiness: This is a specific feeling of physical and mental pleasure in the mind-body. It can arise with zero meditation experience if 'things' are going your way. This is the usual dopamine high non-meditators experience. Happiness can also be trained to access all the time with stability in the higher stages of meditation. Happiness can also arise independently of joy. Joy: Joy is a comprehensive positive mental state. In the context of meditation, it usually arises with happiness in dependent of external circumstances in an internal manner due to unification of mind. It also can arise without any pleasurable feelings and happiness in the mind. Joy skews your awareness, emotional health and cognitive interpretations towards what is wholesome and loving effortlessly. In a joyful mind, the following will occur: Something that usually creates a lot of suffering and negative feelings in a non-meditator will only produce mild-unpleasantness. Something that produces mild-unpleasantness will only produce neutral feelings. Something that produces neutral feelings (like sitting down and breathing) will produce mildly pleasurable sensations. Something that produces a lot of pleasurable feelings will produce ECSTATIC levels of bliss. The combination of joy and happiness in meditation directly reduces craving and suffering in a significant manner. Tranquility: This is basically calm abiding contentment. Contentment is the keyword here. We tend to think that someone who is tranquil is dull and neutral. This has negative connotations. It is also inaccurate in the context of meditation. Tranquility induces a calm and serene state of mind. That is true but it does so with energy. So if you are dull, that is not true tranquility. Also, the feeling of neutrality is a misconception as well. Equanimity and neutrality are not the same things in the slightest. This is important because any lack of clarification here can result in a meditator wasting years of their lives getting deeper into sustained states of dullness thinking that they are developing tranquility. So watch out! You can have crazy levels of equanimity with joy and happiness. In fact, that is what you are developing with Samatha. The point is not to develop sustained dullness and emotional neutrality with equanimity. That means you've developed equanimity without happiness and joy. You still need to go back and develop these wholesome emotional states for optimal insight investigation. Back to tranquility! So tranquility means calmness and serenity. That is only 1 side of it. It actually means practicing contentment with calmness. Contentment is different from equanimity. It is extremely important in reducing craving. This one distinction helps you to develop and deepen meditative joy and happiness into daily life. Contentment will enable you to glean more satisfaction from the already existing joy and happiness. It will also reduce craving even more radically than just happiness and joy. If you've thought that high degrees of meditative joy and happiness you experience in meditation has already reduced a lot of craving already, think again! Contentment + meditative joy enables you to see how much suffering resides even in crazy high states of happiness and mental pleasure. This is 3rd jhana practice. But you deepen that practice further with Samatha factors and bring all of those qualities into daily life with TMI. This tranquility aspect of development naturally comes after fully developed meditative joy. Here is how it occurs in a nutshell: 1- Wow! I'm experiencing a lot of happiness and joy internally. This is fucking amazing. I can support this mental state with smiling as well. 2- Wow! This is extremely resilient. I can maintain this in stressful situations. 3- Hmmm...I sometimes experience a reduction in meditative joy when I get really tired and sleepy. Let me try to understand what leads to this experience. 4- I guess there is subliminal craving and suffering attached to meditative joy. I also fear that I might lose this in the future. The overall craving gets overwhelming when I get tired so happiness and joy go away. I don't really know how to combat this issue... 5- I also can't quite maintain joy and happiness in daily life when I'm moving around and doing stuff. It is still very stable but I don't momentarily taste the joy and happiness in evey microscopic movement of my body in movement. I think I need to work on this more. Because, meditative joy in movement results in craving and suffering. I guess I have developed a decades-long habit of urgency and movement with craving. I tend to move fast and speak fast. I lose a lot of mindfulness in these states. I need to add more contentment, tranquility and body awareness to every microscopic body movement, otherwise joy and and happiness can't be maintained on a momentary basis. I might get the illusion that it is stable but it actually isn't. And I'm still suffering quite a bit. 6- WOW! When I bring tranquility, joy and happiness are dominating my conscious experience with more stability in a state of contentment. I also experience more reduction in craving and therefore suffering less when I'm doing stuff in the world, talking to people and planning stuff. 7- This basically means that I can wake up in the morning - get the joy and happiness with tranquilty- pay EXTRA attention to maintaining this in movement with contentment and re-train the nervous system to stay in the present moment without craving. This is the next level after meditative joy development. Your entire life truly turns into high-quality meditation at this point. At this mastery, you are a stage 9 TMI meditator if you've also developed metacognitive awareness and stable attention sufficiently. The next step is adding the equanimity aspect of development. This is very challenging and is the final step in developing samatha. Equanimity: This is sublime non-reactivity to pleasure and pain. The nervous system shuts down its 'craving' operating system and activates equanimity. Your body and mind stop interfering with the present moment experience. This leads to the complete elimination of suffering at the HIGHEST level of mastery. But in its developing stages, it results in significant reductions in craving and suffering. As a stage 10 TMI meditator, you will have a highly developed equanimity. But it won't be high enough to result in full elimination of suffering permanently. That requires deeper and deeper awakenings, not just advanced Samatha development. So once you have meditative joy + tranquil contentment, you already have some degree of equanimity. But it is not enough to do advanced insight practices. You can probably get to profound equanimity occasionally in formal sits, the game plan is to get there every day. Then every sit. Then to get that equanimity in daily life. And then to start an adventure into insight development. At this point, you'll have the following skills applied both in formal sits and daily life: 1- Stable Attention & Momentary Attention (consistent upacara and kannika levels of samadhi) 2- Joy and Happiness (piti and sukha) 3- Powerful Metacognitive Awareness (satisampajanna ) 4- Tranquility and Contentment (passaddhi) 5- Profound Equanimity (upekkha) This is the end of stage 10 TMI practice. You can do many things at this point. Self-enquiry in no-mind? Go for it! You have the skills to do it. Dependent origination practice? Go for it! You have the skills to do it. Craving reduction? Go for it! You have the skills to do it. Mahamudra? Go for it! You have the skills to do it. Infinity and love? Go for it! You have the skills to do it. Compassion and Shadow work? Go for it! You have the skills to do it. Emptiness and Impermanence? Go for it! You have the skills to do it.

Even before getting into spirituality I realized the joy of being alone, and this cured me of any feelings of loneliness, while also making deliberate socializing for the sake of socializing seem pointless. I rarely make plans to get together with friends, but I end up having some really good interactions with people at the yoga center I go to, and other times when encountering familiar faces while out and about. Other times I barely talk to anyone all day, and that's perfectly fine. When I feel really in my bliss is while I get to be home alone by myself, or out on a walk outside with no one else around. A very positive side effect of being very comfortable alone, one which I am developing more of, is I don't need to talk about myself when I do interact with friends. And so I have learned to be genuinely interested in people and be a good listener, which actually makes me more likable. The old way was using an opportunity to talk to someone to meet my own perceived social needs, and from that angle I ended up stuck in my own head blurting out things just to fill any silence and hope I am being a good enough talker.

What potential actions and paths offer the most value to yourself and your community? Have you gone through Leo's Life Purpose Course? If not, I highly recommend it. What would Love do now? --- Fruitful. Fertile. Generative. Valuable. Arable. Abundance. Value. Help. All In. Giving. Efflux. Acceptance. Patience. Beauty. Assistance. Peace. Joy. Cooperation. Creation. Intelligence. Efficiency. Grace. Passion. Vibrance. Contribution. Focus. Care. Gentle. Soothing. Inspiration. Growth. Mastery. Vision. --- “There is nothing I have to do, nowhere I have to go, and no way I have to be except exactly the way I am being right now. My happiness is knowing this, my joy is expressing it, my bliss is experiencing it.” How can I serve myself in the highest creation? How can I serve humanity today? How can I spread love to others today? How can I help others grow today? What would Love do now?

@thetrut11 You are correct about relative love. From a relative perspective, everything you say is true and I don't think anyone on the forum would disagree with you regarding relative love. You are missing something about unconditional Love. Yet you don't seem more interested in protecting your relative view as absolute, than to expand. Here is the key question for you. . . Which people should we tell it is relative? If we tell non-cannibals that cannibalism is beautiful, they will be disgusted. If we tell cannibals that cannibalism is beautiful it will resonate with them. Watch how the cannibal talks about human arms and legs in the first video. Watch interview with Jeffrey Dahmer. He was very open open about his cannibalistic nature. From their perspective, human limbs are beautiful. Observe how the man talks about human limbs in the first video, he has a deep appreciation and he is in bliss. This is undeniable. You can observe it for yourself. Obviously, the disgusting nature of cannibalism is not universal - if it was universally disgusting, there wouldn't be any cannibals! The nature of cannibalism is relative. Personally, I have the genetics and social conditioning to perceive cannibalism as being disgusting. The idea of eating another human is repulsive to me. As well, I would help protect someone from a cannibal. However, there is transcendence that is aware my orientation is relative and that a cannibal has a different relative orientation. Importantly, no one is saying the opposite to your view is universally true. Your view is that cannibalism is disgusting. No one is saying that you are wrong and that cannibalism is not disgusting - rather that it is beautiful. The point is that cannibalism is beautiful to a cannibal. This is a half-step to realizing absolute. Yet it is an important half-step. Without this half-step, a person will conflate relative and absolute - just as you are doing here.

I relate with what you said, I've lived most of my days in the solitary bliss of my room But but there's a catch. I realized that I 'need' to be alone for long periods of time after socializing. And that means that people are draining my energy. Why are they able to drain my energy? Because it is not in my control. I find superficial discussions on general life and politics very uninteresting and whenever someone starts discussing these topics, my mind wanders off into some other place, a.k.a. I lose my presence and awareness, which causes the loss of energy. If I can figure out a way to remain present equally in all scenarios, with or without people, company would be as blissful as solitude and better still, there wouldn't be much distinction between what I find interesting and what I don't find interesting. And I have a long way to go. (Do you notice how enlightened people have no need to be alone nor do they need to be around people all the time? They do whatever is necessary for whatever work they are doing.)

Okay, it has been a few years, same phantom pain but its irregular, sometimes its just pure bliss but when its there there is almost bo way getting rid of it. Sometimes there comes a deep sense of resistance to meditation that you almost makes you want to move the body psychologically. However there are some other techniques that kinda reverses the strong determination sitting principle like working with fear and completion also listening to existential truths works. Thanks!

Hm. I don't know what to say really. But I can totally see how the spiritual path of dissolving the ego gradually would bring bliss and reduce any suffering.

In the Garden of Eden we were in bliss as we lived in ALIGNMENT with the structure of reality. But we also had NO AWARENESS of it. As consciousness wanted to know itself, the fall happened. Humanity started to OPPOSE the structure of reality and friction was created. This friction is what we call pain and suffering. And so pain and suffering have divine purpose as it informs consciousness where opposition of the structure of reality is happening. Thus consciousness learns about itself by learning about what it is NOT. And so as you start your quest of UNDERSTANDING the strcuture of reality you will WELCOME pain more than anything, as without you would be lost. And as you realign your interpretation of reality with the truth, you will be able to correctly predict the outcome of an action. Thus your ability to create your desires will merely be the reflection of the accuracy of your understanding of truth.

If it comes suddenly, it is most likely also bound to go suddenly. Sometimes this happens without us really knowing why. You can try to go and figure it out and maybe you'll find some nice answers, but this is not the essential. Be prepared for this too change. The best preparation for that shift is not to start fearing or mentally bulking yourself up or whatever, but to actually detach from the positive and pleasant sensations you're having right now. Just don't give it any special attention. Enjoy it, but when I say enjoying it I don't mean that you need to grab onto it. Just allow it to go through you and stay neutral towards it. People are all enthousiastic about the notion of detachment when things are going bad, but when things are going good they forget all about that notion and then completely lose themselves in the positive duality. This is how most people with bipolar disorder experience their life. They get depressed and then life gets all terrible and they may even start contemplating suicide, and then sometime later enter their manic phase in which they get all energetic and happy, and this depressive phase that they had loses all their meaning, and they get completely lose in the impulsive mania and start acting really stupid, because their thinking process is: "What does it matter? I'm completely happy anyway!". And then they have to deal with the shit they created in this manic phase when they enter their depressive phase again. And so the cycle goes on. You can't detach from the negative if you aren't willing to detach from the positive. Right now is your best opportunity. You may not feel like you're very interested right now because you're happy and nothing else really seems to matter because you're happy and peaceful anyways, but when you would get to a phase in which things would start to get much worse, then the notion of detachment will probably seem a whole lot more attractive to you, but then its in some sense too late because when you're low, you have much less energy and space for you to be able to detach yourself. When you're high, it's much easier to detach in a sense because the detachment won't come out of a struggle, which will be the tendency when you're on the low side of things. True freedom isn't what you're experiencing right now. True freedom is the detachment from this positive, pleasant experience too. Freedom is detachment from all. Good or bad, comfortable or uncomfortable. True and total freedom is to be aloof under any circumstances. That's what most people don't understand. They think that experiencing a high is the Ultimate. It's not the ultimate; it's just a high. It may be a existential melting with God and divine unity and infinite bliss or whatever, but once we get back in our normal state of mind and in the relative world, all it would have been was a high. Maybe such an experience is part of the Ultimate. But i feel that without the quality of the witness, of a detached Being, of what we could call "the fourth eye", I still feel like something is missing. If you come to get addicted or attached to such experiences, however divine and total it may be, then still you are not free. Seek freedom, not experiences nor insights.

I am sorry Tsuki for not replying before. Did you send me Synchronicity? I have never participated in a forum anywhere before and was having a bit of trouble figuring it out. Still am I am sure. So I have been commenting on Leo's videos and writing in One Note. Like I think I am replying to you but wondering if I am replying to Ethan. I'm not really thrilled to hear what it is like for Ethan. I see no reason to doubt him but it's a dirty job and I'm glad that I don't have to do it. Yet. Oh shit. I hope he gets to the bliss part pretty quick if I Follow him. And if I am him. And I'm not going to check my bank account until tomorrow but I will split the million with you if this Rebecca of my infinite selves is the one that got lucky. That "if" part pretty much kills it for us though. Suddenly God as Nothing is looking better and better. So maybe God as Ethan wanted to try being Humanity without forgetting the infinity part. Man, I don't even like filing and sorting my stuff! He is kind of nailing it in terms of what I got a glimpse of with infinite possible lives and only one now. I wish he hadn't brought in the pets and the phone though.

I've been struggling with this for the past few years after taking the LP course. There is a bit of a conflict between some of the top career authors out there: Follow your Bliss ala Joseph Campbell, or Master your Profession via Cal Newport. I struggle with this because I have just graduated from an expensive chiropractic school that has taken quite a bit of time and energy to get through. I generally dislike the career path I've found myself on, wishing instead to focus on art. Still, I understand the art field is littered with bullshit as well. So, the question I have for you all is, how important do you see medium in life purpose? Should I suck it up and plow through to master chiropractic (where I have established power and skills) or will I be wasting my time by not building skills in a more artistic medium? Thanks in advance for all the advice and opinions!

seeking a mystical experience is kind of a trap in this work, which i myself sometimes fall into. Because once you become Infinite, and once you get past any backlash you might have, you want to become it again. The best thing i would say to do is continue your meditation practices, or yoga, etc. But do not go in seeking a mystical experience, simply do the practices and dwell in Being or the present moment. Because seeking or desiring a mystical experience is paradoxically moving you away from it because it is the ego co-opting it for itself. This work is very paradoxical and counter-intuitive. Ultimately you can discover that there is no difference between this (duality) and a mystical experience (non-duality). You are in bliss now, you just aren't conscious of it At that point there is no more need to seek anything.

@Annoynymous A mystical experience, which is direct experience of pure Being / Infinite Love / Formlessness / Infnity, will remove all anxiety, worry, depression, suffering, etc and replace it with Divine Absolute Bliss - but alas, only for a time. Essentially you die before you die, and when you come back, you still flee this bliss but for a short period of time. However, as you integrate back into your ego, these things will slowly creep back into your life. That is why it is said that this is where the real work begins. Your level of consciousness as a result of the experience has gone up - and you now are armed with the realizations that you took away from the mystical experience. With these realizations you can begin the work of mastering your ego, through understanding yourself and reality better, and using the skill of going meta. For example, if you have the realization that death is infinite Love, then what is there really to be anxious about, or worry about, or fear? With this understanding you can slowly transcend fear itself, which is rooted in the fear of death - because you've already died! It is easier said than done because survival skills kick in and fear is necessary for the survival of the self. But ultimately the more awakenings you have and the deeper you go the easier it will be and the more conscious you become. This will result in less and less suffering. More consciousness = less suffering. So through integrating these realizations you will greatly reduce suffering in your life - because you are able to see through the root of suffering itself now. That is why it is said that liberation is ultimately the end of all suffering. Because you have become Infinite, but then returned to a finite form - though this time different - and able to see the illusion of form, and that in order for there to be form there must be deception. That is how it helps. But it is a process of integration and embodiment in your everyday life.

Mystical Traditions have methods of semen retention which is said to facilitate awakening of kundalini/central channel and offer other benefits. In my experience I have never gone more than like 5 weeks in one run. After orgasming I notice a substantial drop in energy, motivation, concentration, clarity, I feel more anxiety, less mood stability, even. I notice that my meditation goes deeper and my one pointedness is stronger after like 2 to 3 days of abstinence. I feel more confident, music sounds better, I feel more alive, etc. However, it is difficult/impossible to maintain the semen retention for longer periods of time. How do people do this? I have cut down huge from how I sexually active I used to be. Like 5 years I used to masturbate nearly daily and sometimes multiple times per day. I don't know if I just did not notice "side effects" back then because I did it so often whereas as now as of lately I will do once a week on average with sometimes being twice a week but I don't like to do it too often. I get a biological urge for orgasm after so many days but I feel much better not being compulsive/addicted/habituated from a period of abstinence. The benefits I listed above became apparent after I experimented with semen retention. I noticed that if I take a psychedelic after like 4 or 5 days or more abstinence I have more lucidity, more bliss, more stability, can go deeper into the experience, what I experience has more staying power, etc with my trips. Can people share their input and/or own experiences with this? There are more moments of such joy and freedom from compulsion that I glimpse after semen retention streaks that I wish I could not have the biological need to orgasm/have sex/masturbate. It's a fulfillment that beats fiending for a biological release but I can't maintain indefinitely and I wish it would not return really because of the moments of such fulfillment

@Commodent Thank you, too much of this transcendence BS going on here, no idea why, and it shows the immaturity of a lot of the people here imo. It's fine to fucking feel sad if you feel sad! I honestly don't get what people expect true awakening/ enlightenment is. @zeroISinfinity As I keep saying Leo isn't the only teacher in the world lol, and imo from various people I've spoken to is certainly not at the highest stage of realization, maybe he's had insights from his multitude of trips but it's pretty evident he isn't embodied there. I'm talking from direct experience which everyone seems to love here except when it goes against there agendas. You will still have emotions, you're a human, I don't get what you expect. BEfore you go into some rant on how we are awareness existentially, yes I get that and if you want to go there All there is the Self, there is no other, the Self is literally ALL, the world doesn't even exist as all there is is this Self, when you arrive here you realize an unbreakable silence. I'm really trying to help you, so many teachers preach transcendence of humanity and if I'm honest it's fucking dangerous, you are not a rock, you are a human who will experience an array of emotion. Yes there is a background of permanent peace that never leaves, but there is still emotion, a small example is an artist I listen to passed away suddenly yesterday and I felt an incredible rush of sadness, you know why? Because no longer do I suppress my emotions, instead I fully feel them with all my body, good or bad, as there is no resistance left, emotion is to be felt. I wish you luck if you think awakening is all sunshine and rainbows and you're round the corner from permanent bliss, of course there's states of bliss and love etc, but you can get that from Psyches, a true genuine awakening is learning to feel absolutely everything without resistance and living life FULLY in the now, whatever life throws at us. About destroying the mind, I have done that, the Mind doesn't actually exist, all that exists are thoughts that simply rise in The Self/ Awareness whatever you want to call it, do their thing and pass, no such thing as a mind ever existed, thoughts are always 1 thought at a time no matter how entangled they can become due to the I-Thought. You are not telling me the truth, because not one word can be uttered about the truth, the absolute can not be put into words, hence why all words are merely pointers. The Truth can only be experienced and lived, in reality EVERYONE is the truth, yet very few know it, very few consciously live as The Self. But, please, be careful when thinking enlightenment will lead to you somehow transcending this world, when this very world is the Buddha, the laptop I'm writing this on is the Buddha, EVERYTHING is and This is it, this very moment is it.

@zeroISinfinity Sorry but that's complete BS, and a total fantasy in my eyes, and is part of the issue. I promise I'm not meaning to be rude but this is a HUGEEE trap I constantly see, and one I fell for. You're telling me Self-Realized beings wouldn't get sad/ cry when a family member passes away, or they see injustice in the world? If anything I've noticed the opposite, you feel your emotions 1000x stronger as there's no longer any resistance, at the same time there's also nothing but space/awareness etc at the 'centre' of these thoughts and emotions therefore they are no longer sticky so to speak. Maybe for some Yogi's meditating in a cave 24/7 with no real responsibilities or traditional life you could stay in a bliss state 24/7, but in the real world it's very naive to think that. This sort of thinking promotes transcendence of the human condition rather than embodying and embracing your humanity, which is a KEY part of the work that is usually missed out on. @Haumea2018 used a great term for this 'PsychoSpiritual' learning who you are on a personality level is key, the term 'different strokes for different folks' is a great representation of this. Except without knowing about yourself, you won't learn your personal pitfalls and how to move past them. This is not a one size fits all teaching as many Neo-Advaitans would have you believe. Again, not at all meaning to be rude, but this can really hinder progress.

Because adults fear for them. Adults handle most of the child's survival needs (if the adults are good), which affords the child the luxury of play and being. Of course a child has less to fear because they don't know how dangerous the world is yet. In this case ignorance is bliss. But it cannot last.

If you were spontaneous and live in the eternal present, the eternal now, forget about the past, don't worry about the future but live in this particular second, in this second there are no problems. If you can only stay in this split second, noone is hungry, noone is ill, noone is in need, noone is suffering. As you begin to stay in that split second, this split second expands into a minute, into two minutes, into ten minutes and as you abide in it, it turns into eternity. You are always in that split second where nothing is happening. Where no thing is taking place. That split second is bliss, pure intelligence, absolute reality and you are that. […] It begins when you get up in the morning. You observe the I. You watch yourself thinking I got up, I just woke up. But now here's the catch, do not allow the I to go any further. As soon as you watch yourself saying, "I just woke up." Try to catch yourself and ask yourself the question, "Who is the I that just woke up?" For in that split second prior to awakening you were in bliss, no thoughts. But as soon as you begin to think of the I, the world comes into play. In that split second before I came along you were awake. Yet there was no world, there were no people, there was no universe, there were no problems. In that split second. But as soon as you began to think of I your troubles began. Because you're thinking about the day, I'm hungry, I have to take a shower. I have to get dressed and I begins to do its mischief. That is why it's very important to observe the I coming out. If you can really observe it you will see that the I is coming out of your spiritual heart on the right side of your chest. But a funny thing will happen. As you observe it, it will go back, isn't that interesting? As you observe the I or as you question it, "Where did the I come from?" It will stop. It will stop its procedure, it will stop its journey to the brain where you become body conscious. All these things happen in a split second. So you have to be aware, you have to be alert, you have to watch for it. I admit it takes some effort in the beginning but it's well worth it. Think about this again. Just before you awaken to the I, you are already awake in that split second. In that split second there is no world but you are awake, you are conscious, you're totally happy, you're totally self-realized in that split second. But then the I begins its journey from the heart to the brain. Now if you can observe the I and question its authority, it will lose its momentum and slow down. And begin to return to the heart. If you can get it to return to the heart, you will be conscious but you will be liberated. You will go about your business like you always do. You will take your shower, you will eat your breakfast, it will all happen spontaneously. There will be no thoughts. The only experience you will have is total bliss. Total happiness, total joy and yet your body will go about it's business. It can happen all at once or it can take time. But it's worth the effort, isn't it? Even if it takes you a lifetime, at least you will be free at that time. What is more important than this? Can anything be more important than this? This guarantees that you do not return to this earth. It guarantees that while you are alive in your body, so-to-speak, you will be a jivan-mukta, self-realized in the body. This is your only salvation. But you've got to do it. These teachings used to be handed out by the Rishis from mouth to mouth to explain it. It is most difficult to comprehend the books. Even though some of them are very clear ... (tape break then Robert continues) ... something within that knows what to do to make it happen. But if you try to understand with your brain, with your head, you will forget. And when tomorrow morning comes you will get up and your I will take over immediately. You will say I'm late for work, I'm in a hurry, I'm this and I'm that and you will forget everything we're talking about this evening. But if you are listening with your heart, when tomorrow morning comes you will spontaneously be able to catch yourself. I will repeat again how to do this. When you first open your eyes, in that split second you are conscious. The I has not risen yet, but remember it's all happening in a second. So you've got to be aware, you've got to be awake, intelligent. Watch and you will notice that the I begins very faintly and becomes stronger. You can shout out, "Who are you?" That's the same as saying, "Who am I?" Who gave you permission to awaken? Observe, watch. The I will begin to lose momentum. The I will become weaker and weaker. The way it usually happens with people, with most people, is they're able to catch it for maybe a few seconds and then the I will take over completely. Do not be disappointed, that is the worst thing you can do. It has taken most people years, centuries perhaps to go all the way. Be happy with what you've got. But as you begin to do this practice diligently, everyday, that split second where you observe the I, will expand into a full second, into two seconds, into three seconds. In other words for those three seconds you will be self-realized to an extent. You will be conscious, period. You will not be conscious of this or that, you will be conscious. And you will feel something you never felt before, a joy. You will know you're on the right track. Then when the I takes over completely you can get up and go about your business and ask yourself, "Who am I? What is the source of the I?" During the day as the thoughts come to you, be receptive, be alert, question, "To whom do these thoughts come?" They come to me, "Who's me? Who am I? What is the source of the I?" Practice that all day. […] May you all experience bliss and your true Self. Robert Adams, T63: How Bad Do You Want To Awaken?

LETTING GO ISN’T SOMETHING “I” DO BUT JUST SOMETHING THAT APPEARS TO NATURALLY HAPPEN Letting go is often implied to be something we can do when one is experiencing circumstances that bother us. Letting go, however, isn’t something we do, nor is it done just when something seems to bother us. In fact, letting go is meditation of the Self on the Self by observing the non-self. It’s not just a letting go of things that seem to bother “us” but also the letting go of what doesn’t bother you as well. Letting go of even that which you seem to enjoy. Letting go of the experiences and the experiencer altogether. It’s the letting go of the person. Letting go of the “you” that is only a self-image in the mind, this separate self individual that doesn’t have an independent reality and is entirely relative to thoughts. This is liberation, this is true meditation. The person who doesn’t even exist isn’t who meditates. Just observe the one who appears to have cravings but do not identify with the mind’s creating yet another image of identity in the thoughts of “I am not the person but the observer observing the person,” or “I am now this witness witnessing the individual.” Notice how all desires always arise with this individual who appears in the mind as the I-thought. If you observe this supposed entity that really isn’t any entity at all and don’t identify with it then the “letting go” just happens effortlessly and spontaneously. If you abide here in this function of detached witnessing the desire/craving will subside and disappear on its own. Only the natural bliss of being will remain which desires only seem to veil and make seem like a temporary transient experience that really isn’t temporary, transient, nor experience. It just is. There is no Doer who can make the craving come or go away. There is no Doer that can do “letting go.” There is no Doer that can make change of the wanted or unwanted feeling or do the allowing of a negative feeling. It just happens, and if you abide in the witnessing non-identity you’ll soon realize there is no Doer. What appears to be happening just appears to be happening to absolutely no one. -iZuhm

So I rent a room in this house now. There is only one person staying in the same building to look after the place. He apparently like talking to me and taking every opportunity. Yesterday we've been talking in the kitchen while I was cooking and somehow we went onto his story when he had a surgery and he had his third heart stroke. He said that things became black and white and for a few seconds he was watching on that machine his heart beat turned into this straight line... And he suddenly felt s lot of bliss and became very peaceful. Welcome home, I thought. Another story. Yesterday I felt really wrong somehow I couldn't get up in the morning and also I couldn't focus and generally do anything. I went for a walk to meditate in the forest nearby which is noisy anyway. But on the way there was this dog really unfriendly and even attacky towards me. I have been just standing there watching him running around me and his owner couldn't take control of him. He said it's first time he behave like this. Must be something in me, I've replied. And indeed very different experience with the dog compared to my previous one when all I felt was love and peace.

There had been a strong craving for this one boy from past one month. But the boy seemed cool with and without distance. And when there was negligence it was killing me. For the first time I felt of full submission to someone, even a touch of him will make my whole body full of acetylcholine and dopamine. And he too admitted things like me being one in million and I m his very own Sun. Moment seem to cease with him, world use to shut dwn and the feeling of being one without constraints was realized and then followed...let me use the term "bliss". But all of a sudden due to some constraints he start ignoring me as if never heard of me. And my heart start feeling heavy and a constant pain was there. So rather than going into darkness of victim state I started asking positive questions. I asked myself, pain was for what, he being neglecting me or loosing him. Turns out to be both and former being more. I cried out most of the time and flushed my whole energy out on craving. I texted him like anything and told him how helpless I was feeling. I used to watch some inspirational vedioes and get fresh energetic but Bam with one picture of him all knowledge get swayed away and again craving. But following points made me out of this situation forever?: 1. Start looking for Self Love as mentioned by our Leo. Truely saying I raised my hand and asked universe to help me, mentioning how I m born and got every vitality because of this unknown natural force. And that we are the Source. We human are such a natural manifestor. Claririty start manifesting inside me. 2. Let all you have be out in the most elaborated form. Dont keep it to just yourself let your lover know this. It will slowly help in either realize your energy worth better or make him/her realize what he has done or what he gonna miss in life. 3. Somehow make communication with him and get things clear, i.e. concious uncoupling. 4. Rather than isolating yourself forever after a while of crying and shouting and long silence get in touch with friends you like to hang with. 5. Spend some lone time with yourself. And try to be observer. Meditate. Initially it may kill you more but magically it will take over...have faith. 6. Start taking care of yourself more than ever, exercise or long jogging are great. Guys, finally that pain is out of my heart and I m feeling so free... And the best part begin...not only He started communicating back but almost every corner is bouncing with amazing people and above all I feel myself no string attached situation and at the same time grounded. Cheers to life...cheers to SELF Love.

@Alex bliss Do you know you are you?