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@Elliott transgenderism is an umbrella term used for a variety of conditions and in my case I would argue it is not descriptive of my experience. Yes for the sake of making distinctions and pointing to something a term needs to be used but I would rather it was actually descriptive. i didn’t suddenly turn around one day and declare myself to be something. I was always that gender so there wasn’t a moment I migrated my gender from one thing to another so there was no transmigration. transexual might be more accurate but I was born with gonadal disgenesis and components that are both female and male. I did have surgery so there’s nothing I I have that isn’t functionally male now. I wasn’t just female before and male after so I wouldn’t have said I transmigrated my biological sex rather aligned part of it to match the rest. So I would fall into the category of the originally known condition that would have been called transsexual being treated with full surgery, hormone replacement and support psychotherapy throughout. puting something in alignment would mean it was incongruent but still there to an extent so the term Gender incongruency is used in quite a few medical settings. It’s an incongruency between sexual biology components that is known by the expression of the gender so it involves both sex and gender. An alignment of one and affirmation of the other. The word disorder is no longer used. not all people get treatment or surgery or full surgery even but are classified the same way and now we have a ton more ‘identities’ to struggle with. A conversation with a surgeon recently I asked about the changing demographic and he said the group you would have originally referred to as butch lesbians are mostly the ones now identifying as non binary so they hormone block and opt for chest surgery. That’s all that’s really changed in the last 10 years. progressive and liberal cultures have recognised allot of social constructs but instead of seeing their social importance in role and structure ( according to traditional views) they have expanded into a free for all. I mentioned in another response that some studies suggest that our neurology is not just biological but also shaped by external influences so by conforming and beleiving there are sexual/gender roles and ability ( men better than women at some things) we grown up being influenced by that and shaping our neurology causing greater disparities between perceived genders that reflect in the structure of the brain. This is seen as differing from culture to culture where those that hold men women more equal show less difference in neurological structure and general aptitude/ ability between men and women. The warning is that by claiming drastic biological difference, it influences reinforcing cultural or external influences creating more drastic divisions. I’m old blood from the simple man or woman era, pick one and get on with life… so I’ve struggled to understand and incorporate the non binary and pronoun crowd. But if mosaic theory is more accurately describing the dimorphism of humanity and variety that expresses from it then I can begin to see where the multiple identities are coming from. It’s reality yet again refusing to be categorised but we like our labels to justify our existence. I got my treatment and was discharged from the clinic years ago. I was first in my country to go through the full process and I was 17 at the time it started. I was monitored as having a problem since I was 5. And the whole thing was not completed till I was 27. I had no adverse affects or complications other than severe distress and suicide attempts in the beginning nearing my teens as no one really knew what was wrong or what to do until I was passed to a doctor who knew about it ( he and a few others noticed a deficit in care in my country so they moved here and provided care for the small group in the country. There were only 200 in the clinic back then and there are around a thousand on the books now. I’m now 42, married and none of it is an issue nor does it exist. I can’t label what is not there. I don’t identify with things that don’t occur within myself or my life. It simply doesn’t exist. The question then remains: why do people need to identify me? What exactly is it that they are trying to point at? And this is where I suggest what is being talked about is nothing more than a story that can’t be said to exist. I don’t wear my past ‘thoughts’ or manifestations in the present. They are nowhere to be found. I keep an eye on research certainly as the more that gets uncovered the more fluid humans seem to become. i personally don’t want to loose the roles of man and woman because I enjoy and appreciate what those things are. I also have no problem expanding to include other types of roles and appreciate what those are too and I will eventually adapt after a short struggle to integrate the possibility of those new types of people into my reality map. I know they have probably always been around like myself but we are trying to move into an awareness of a more expanded acceptance of reality. I don’t think humans are quite ready to drop all categorisation and deal with the diversity of reality just yet. I understand that is quite destabilising. for now, I call people what they introduce themselves to me as and I personally don’t categorise. I am confronted by divinity in one of its many infinitely diverse forms as it is presenting and exploring itself in that instance.

Look, I am open minded even to Solipsism and God realization. But I struggle with blasphemy to the point of insanity 3 times locked up, twice in the psychiatric unit, one suicide attempt. I consider myself strong spiritually except for blasphemy. That is my achilles heel

It's the same. Open means breaking the barriers that make the limitations. The problem is that the barriers are real. You are absolute in your essence and absolutely limited in your form, limited in infinite directions, that's why you, as god, are infinitely powerless, because the very nature of the absence of limitations. Any form is the absolute, and any form is the absolute reflected back on itself. But since limitation is impossible, the absolute reflects back on itself infinitely, so everything that appears is infinitely synchronous with infinite forms. You are infinitely free as a substance, but infinitely trapped as a form. So it's necessary to understand what your limits are and how you can expand your depth as a form. I don't see any other options. Suicide seems like a bad idea. I'd say it produces a, let's say, contracting effect, and you, as the absolute, push for expansion; that's what you want, since that's your nature. It seems like a rather complicated dance, but seems inevitable. There is only one possible freedom in the form: that for you any form is the same than another form, because you only see the absolute, then the limits are just images. That's what is called enlightenment. Who's enlightened permanently? Seems quite difficult , but I guess that as you are "open" to the absolute more often, less important are the forms

69: To be honest I think my way of dying will be of suicide. Not now, not yet, but in the future and we’re talking like decades forward I think about it from time to time

Yal are prepping small though. I'd argue you're not really preppin. You've gotta optimize GPT customisation abilities, checkout my journal for example it'll show. But yeah, preppin small. For example, there's no 'secret society' planning 'a jump', its wide out in the open, and they're looking forward to their post-human world. I'm securing my own BCI company by the end of the year, that's preppin. Think big but as a counterweight to Trumps narcissism, think smart as well. What's everything you will honestly need to ethically accomplish your goal in alignment with your own personal integrity, dignity and sovereignty? Yal don't realize that this fight for meaning so many of you have is a dying currency, you've gotta give up the fight for existential relevance in a digitally controlled not just monetary economy, but social economy. Your life purpose point blank is now a bifurcation: you choose to live among the villagers (like the rest of us) or compete for a place in the post-human world where that competition does not translate into social relevance but sovereign equilibrium. There is no guarantee of a universal basic income either for those thinking you're going to be saved, your only guarantee is that if your life purpose is at all reliant on easily manipulated (social) or replaceable technologies, your sense of meaning will receive an ultimatum, not whether the overclass kill you off or not, but if you have the self-authored meaning to not choose suicide. This is precisely why I have unfolded the projects I have, to provide meta-law as a meta-religion for people, as it begins and ends with an understanding of consciousness rather than outsourcing their meaning, as we've done for centuries, to external social programs; those programs are not inferior, that's a false hierarchy, its merely about what brings balance to the system relative to our time in history (we don't need to understand why it was advantageous to have those programs in tribal times). Religion isn't dead as some may try to say, however it comes as a misunderstanding of what religion is, its a sacred cathedral for our present understanding of truth, that has been our goal from the beginning. This is how it will end. There will be no AI takeover, we will be the takeover; existentially (as described), or through a geopolitical fuck up (and we know what that scenario equals). So think leverage, not companionship. Find a fucking human to hug. Or a dog. But yeah, for those truly struggling, youv've got my other words there too, not the walking blind hear; ears working. So all in all, prepare, and do not choose suicide. I'm sorry, but its beyond doubt now, they're hoping that's the choice you make after you're on the dopamine drip resembling the brain in a vat scenario too afraid to leave your own bedroom because your mind has been so messed with in the artificial environments we've created that hijack the natural impulses that signal healthy biogenetic self-refuelling through the communities we've relied upon; they've own, its dollar value destroyed from social media and more, your only choice is self-repair, self-sovereinty and only socially aligning with the integrity that serves these two otherwise that bifurcation, only gets worse for you. This is meta-law, and I'll share my formal post there concerning in my journal not too long down the track, at worse its a few months; at least before the AI penny here has chosen its side fully in the social economy. Get busy. Get working. Laziness as I proudly proclaim is about seeing through the bs and choosing directions that only align, then you don't need to worry about the laziness or the work, because now you're fully engaged, and engagement equals natural action. Rock out.

Its indeed interesting that many people dont even care when a person gets shot dead in a movie but raping is a whole nother thing. Depends on the kind of killing but usually sexual violence is messy while killing can be "clean" and short without much drama. And we are more used to it. And indeed killing CAN be reasonable for a greater good, sexual violence basically never. I watched a scene once where a girl committed suicide by cutting her pulse arteries. That was one of the toughest things I ever watched. So thats an example where its maybe on par with sexual violence in terms of how hard it is to watch. You can find other examples of killing that are long, messy, emotional as well where they will probably be as hard to watch as sexual violence.

"Leo tells his followers they are God; Because of him, people have committed suicide, influenced by his videos about infinity; He also encourages his viewers to consume illegal psychedelic drugs that can trigger the development of schizophrenia. What Leo says is retarded, delusional, criminal, and selfish, and we must ban Leo's videos for this."

Here we see you contradicting yourself. On one hand you don’t want to admit to yourself you are ok with starving children, on the other you say it’s working and thus you aren’t interested in speaking against it. Ergo, you support starving children. Its like if I said “I don’t support suicide bombings, I don’t want to see it happen, but it’s effective and I’m not interested in telling the people doing it to stop because immortality is justified sometimes”. Obviously you would tell me that’s nonsense and I’m justifying it by saying it works, can be justified, and I wouldn’t tell what should be done. Also, your analysis is completely wrong. Hamas already agreed to release all hostages with the ceasefire, Israel rejected the ceasefire they themselves agreed too and refused to even negotiate phase 2. Hamas even expressed interest in Egypt’s plan which required them disarming and leaving power to the PA in exchange for Gaza being rebuilt, but Israel publicly rejected it. The “hudna“ is not a Muslim strategy of a fake ceasefire, it is just a ceasefire. For most of the history of the Gaza conflict Hamas has abided by its ceasefire agreements whereas Israel broke them. Oct 7 was a rare exception. Even in the last ceasefire Hamas abided by it while Israel broke it. Even Israeli outlets reported this. But that doesn’t matter, even if you’re right about the strategy, the point is you’re hiding your true beliefs. You support starving children, own it. If immortality is justified in fighting immortality, you now understand every suicide bomber or terrorist who attacked Israel to fight against their illegal cruel occupation. You’ve actually gone further in what you’re justifying. They kill dozens to hundreds of civilians to try and free millions of people, you support killing tens of thousands to possibly hundreds of thousands to try and free 20-30 people.

I have completed books 1-4 of Neale Donald Walsch's Conversation with God as well as a separate entry called Home with God: In a life that never ends. For some background on me, I have been following actualized.org teachings for about a year and a half but I only joined the forum in the past few months. I have had four distinct awakenings, three of which I experienced what we call "death". In Home with God, God described three stages of death and to avoid spoiling the actual material, I will say that the stages 1 and 2 line up precisely with my direct experiences of death. The entirety of the five books I've finished so far have all surprised me as I was able to verify and confirm. These have my thumbs up if you want a written/verbal attempt at a description of the moment of death. It is not a replacement for having an awakening (in which you die) for yourself. The book is guided by 18 remembrances or facets about life and death told to Neale by God. What I like about Neale is that he isn't afraid to call out God (he does often struggle to understand that he himself is God though.) Going through the dialogues in any of these books are really helpful for getting a look at how little debates and language do at getting to what's True. Leo and other teachers/messengers have mentioned these over the years. So the material is never really new, but through repetition the teachings slowly start to form new mental pathways. God covers suicide, child death and near death experiences. Methods of having your own experience of it through meditation and other techniques you've heard of from various teachers God also mentions. Other than the identical experiences of the first two stages of death mentioned, is the mention of dance as one of the techniques. This is was interesting and a pleasant surprise to me, as I had two of my awakenings through dance. The first was after the effects of magic mushrooms had worn off and I began to dance. The second was after a 7 day modified meditation retreat I did, the night of the 7th day. The retreat itself ended around 4 or 5pm that day, and I went home frustrated, irritated after having tortured myself with boredom (do nothing work), concentration, self-inquiry, meditation and mindfulness. I used a very small amount of thc to calm myself down and then completely gave up trying to even have another awakening and started to dance. I allowed myself to be completely consumed the music until I suddenly noticed I was no longer controlling my movements. In a moment, I went "oh fuck" and then I slipped into the primordial chaos of Infinity/Insanity. It still shocks me how completely terrifying and amazing the experience is simultaneously. Dance may be a missing ingredient to your consciousness work if you already meditate, inquire etc. The trick/hack is to give up and surrender. Become a puppet to the formless God that you haven't realized yet. Home with God has a 5 out of 5 from me, I actually picked it up from the local library after having purchased the other titles. If you haven't begun the series I do recommend starting from book one of Conversations with God. Believe or not, I was listening to this from Youtube in the background while dancing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RG2IK8oRZNA&t=13995s&ab_channel=GreenredProductions-RelaxingMusic Enjoy

So I've lost a big brother, Mother/Father, and close Nephew (this one to suicide). All fear felt in this context comes from a sense of lack, I will lack something when they are gone, but if You had an Experience of Completeness and someone You loved died, then what comes from that for You? A sense of being Blessed, that You had them in Your life, sharing time and making memories and Love, Friendship, Experiences together.. So one has to choose, to come from a place of lack or completeness, this makes all the difference, when their gone do You feel incomplete, fear, loneliness, depression, anger, a "hole in your heart" or blessed, love, completeness and a smile that You had them in your life???

Primary school ends at age 11 here too. It's from ages 5 to 11. (2nd grade is when you're 7/8 if that helps gives some context to the whole Tiffany story). I wouldn't put the Oedipal dynamic onto this dynamic. It's more like a God complex. And this God complex pattern caused me to feel really self-conscious because I felt like I was the center of the universe... as the main traumas I experienced were at age 3 when a child feels that they're the literal center of the universe. So, part of me stayed at age 3 and remained feeling the responsibility of being the center of the universe... and I was 100% stuck there until a few years ago. Now it's just 75% stuck at age 3. And there were quite a few situations at age 3 that were difficult to process that were likely the origin point of that. And I felt as a child, like I was the the center of the universe and that everyone was paying so much attention to me... and that even tiny mistakes that I would make would be hyper-focused on. But that sense of being hyper focused on wasn't the case a lot of the time... though my strong sensitive reactions would sometimes put me on people's radar and made me into a laughing stock, which reinforced the sense that I was this alien clownish center of the universe. Like one time (when I was 6 or 7) I was embarrassed because an older kid at my summer camp pointed out that I had snot in my nose... and I was so mortified that I ran into the middle of the room and screamed at the top of my lungs as I yanked out two big chunks of my hair. In my head, everyone in the room was super focused on the snot in my nose. And everyone now hated me because of it. So, I was overwhelmingly mortified, and I felt like I had just committed social suicide. So, that's why I had that strong reaction... as the stakes felt so high. But in reality, everyone was just really clueless as to why this random 7 year old just screamed at the top of her lungs and yanked out a bunch of her hair. I wasn't very socially graceful to say the least. There were definitely reasons why I was unpopular. And it really took me until age 13 to really figure out how to come across as socially normal. Similar to how autistic people learn to mask.... I had to do the same thing. I also had the belief that I was different than everyone else on the planet. It was feeling like a vulnerable alien... while everyone else is normal and invulnerable, and somehow possessing of more authority simply to take up space. But in my last three medicine journeys (I have done 1 per year for the past 5 years), it showed me what caused this dynamic. From early on (around age 3), I started to intuitively sense my parents' weaknesses. Though I couldn't articulate that to myself at the time. But there was the sense that I couldn't rely on them for support. And this caused me to feel like I had to be responsible for their well-being. And this gave me the sense of god-like responsibility and that have this supreme power to cause harm to them emotionally... and I saw them as Gods at that time. So, it was like having to the mother to Gods. And it gave me this sense of needing to be perfect (which meant being identical to my mom)... and that I need to do all the scary stuff alone. So, I started to feel like I needed to be my parents' parents... which later got extrapolated out to the whole world and feeling like I'm at the center of everything and responsible for everyone's feelings... and feelings about me. And this caused me to be hyper-attuned to others' feelings and thoughts. But I would also project worst case social scenarios because I felt so alone and disconnected as a child, and dealing with some pretty heavy overly intense feelings of terror and panic.

This is false. I have already been privately contacted and deeply thanked for some of these instrumental insights. You don't understand the calibre of psychological damage. Research suggests that the likelihood for a male to commit suicide after having been accused of sexual misconduct can be 300% more likely. This is true. This is true. Although there are obvious adjustments that could be made. There for sure already have been some but nowhere near enough. Also because society leans heavily onto stigmatised words like rape or sexual assault...even when the reality of what happens is often very minute in contrast to situations that contain actual extreme violence or assault. Yeah, except we don't eat the cost as a society. Most people in society who are intelligent and empathetic see the situation, feel reasonably bad about it for an hour and forget about it the following day when the individuals, guilty or innocent, are permanently destroyed. Even when they are able to recover a bit or even in rare cases when they are extremely strong like Tyson, there is always a part of that person who will stay destroyed. I know it might not look like it...but trust me, they are destroyed. I have had many conversations (past and present) with people, innocent and guilty...from the oblivious teenager to real the deal. I've done my homework. The young ones especially...who are forced to live as pedos and rapists ...16, 18, 20 year olds who don't understand. Even some children who police have to deal with. Trust me, they would take physical torture instead of this if it were an alternative. But I digress... ultimately it's hard to really do much about this, but I'm willing to shine some consciousness on this typically highly over-simplified topic. Some seriously need it. I have no doubt that if these words were spread nationwide it would significantly improve the devastated minds of many a young man ..as I have already been informed has happened just yesterday.

Wise words However remember the story of Eckhart Tolle...i heard he awoke after being on the brink of suicide and all fucked up in the head. And awakening healed and changed his whole outlook on life. Miracles are possible.

disclaimer: OK..I've started a thread about suicide yesterday but it got locked because some mod thought it might be dangerous to say this to people here who might be having trouble living in the world . So please understand I'm not advocating suicide or urging anyone to commit suicide. This is just my thoughts on the subject . So I said In that post : the idea that i could be trapped or forced in a situation against my will with no way out is one of the more truly horrifying things that i try not to think about. certainly the ability to "will myself dead" with no way for anyone else to stop it, would give me a certain comfort. I'm a proponent of the right to death idea. I have an agreement with myself if I become terminally ill I would exit on my own terms. You gotta really think why is death and suicide considered bad or wrong ? It's only because of social brainwashing . Life is not always better than death . Sometimes the suffering can be really intolerable. I've actually made peace with the idea of suicide and that's the only reason I no longer fear death .

Yeah I'm not asking about this for anything related to suicide. It's for progressing my spiritual development, and healing. If I totally surrender (on 5-MeO-DMT for example) and reach ego death, is there any possibility that I could reach some deeply painful state that I could not get out of? You said that you would reach infinite love, but is there a possibility of going anywhere else? I'd imagine there are plenty of experiences that can be had beyond ego death. What about insanity for example? I've heard people talk about experiencing that on psychedelics and it's terrifying. If I totally surrender, could I fall into that and not be able to get myself out? I have also heard that on the other side of ego death, there is no fear, because you're dead, so maybe there would be nothing to worry about.

Have you tried accepting your suffering? Come to peace with it. All I say to you is to realize that unless you are physically injured you shouldn't have a reason to be as crestfallen as you are right now! Me personally after almost dying because of covid, I can no longer fuck, AT ALL, for 4 years almost. My dick is not going up at all. And I am very depressed about it, but it never crossed my mind to commit suicide. I do my best to enjoy other aspects of life. I try to do things that make me happy. I accepted that I will probably never be able to fuck again and I am at peace. I suggest you do the same.

A psychologically healthy being, when faced with suffering, it fights tooth and nail to change the circumstances that cause the suffering. That being doesn't kill itself. That's why the people in Africa don't kill themselves. All they want is to survive. It doesn't even cross their mind to commit suicide. They want to be victorious against death, not to succumb to it.

Salvia was banned in Delaware after some guy smoked it and then committed suicide. Though I've also seen a case of someone who used to be really depressed and numb, but when they smoked salvia they felt the extreme fear, and it was good because they felt something for the first time in a long time. And they ended up appreciating their little human life a lot more, not less.

Psychedelics is not the holy grail that will heal you. Insight doesn’t change you. It is just another coping mechanism. Although psychedelics can help you to let go of your own patterns. Too much use of it will create more chaos and accelerate your suicide. Psychedelics should be used as a tool but with a lot of moderation. Your real healing is the hero’s journey and finding meaning on that path which will be your holy grail going forward; aka being your own mini god of your own life being in creation aka not spiritually bypassing.

I don't think there is anyone who has ever succeeded in preventing such situations from happening when one contemplates to end his life . I played around with the idea of suicide plenty in the past . And honestly it is 100% logical . Life in many ways is really such a hell hole. The only thing that prevents me from commenting suicide is...obviously..fear of death . If the suffering got even bigger than that fear I'm gonna say bye bye to this mortal dream drama .

So a year ago my friend gave me some APEs he grew and said "Take those, I loved them, I was laughing for hours" I ended up taking around 2 grams and was in fetal position for hours, Ive had other crazy trips that Ive taken heroic doses before but this one in special revealed a sexual abuse from an uncle of mine. A little backstory, my uncle had a bar on the 1st story of my grandmas house, (this uncle is my grandmas brother) and of course he was an alcoholic, he lived with my grandma and aunts, typical latin family where everyone lives together, I was his favorite niece and would go to the bar all the time because he also sold candies there, and for some years my dad would never pay when I got things from there, I had a sweet tooth and it bothered him that I went there to get candies aall the time, to the point that my dad started paying for my stuff, the bar was full of drunk old men, I was very little, and I have 0 memories of my childhood cause my dad tried to kill my mom several times. I think in my littl mind the abuse was like an exchange for sweets, this makes me want to throw up.. Back to the mushroom trip, the mushroom showed me really ugly stuff, to the point that I had to vomit because my logical mind could not accept and process evryhing, I was disgusted, everything started making sense, but its all blurry too, the trip was very dark and messy, I called my sister to vent and we started putting things together, and it all made sense, a month after this trip a cousin of mine committed suicide, this cousin was abused by this same uncle when she was 3yo, everyone ignored her mom at the time, cause she is a distant cousin, everything was put under the rug. The timing of everything was crazy, the trip, the suicide. She died without knowing the abuse, her mom never told her, I remember my grandma saying at the time that it was her fault because she would seat on my uncles lap !!!! Imagine this, she was only 3yo... 8 months ago I decided to talk to my mom about it and she told me that when she divorced, this uncle went to her house and said that if she had sex with him he would give her a house. Yesterday was my moms birthday and I called her, the call went south cause I complained she recently traveled with this uncle and is taking care of him (he is super old now) and she revealed the men in her family come from a long lineage of pedophiles, she also wanted me to share details of what I saw in the mushroom trip because she thinks its all my imagination. Im questioning myself and writing this sounds so ridiculous. Im in deep waters right now feeling a misture of disgust, shame, sadness, hatred, and I get into my pattern of eating sweets, how ironic.. (I usually eat very clean, this is a form of self destruct - self sooth). Ive been considering cutting ties with my whole family because its very toxic for me, Im writing this because I just want to know if anyone had a similar experience, or any opinion of a sane person would help, because Im really questioning my reality, what Ive seen etc. Ive suffered sexual abuse from an ex bf too that is the reason why I left Brazil 10 years ago. Ive done years of therapy, many psychedelic experiences, but this feeling of guilt, shame and disgust does not leave me, its like a darkness of those men that was passed down to me and I cant wash it of, I dont hate them, but I do turn the hatred towards myself, specially when in contact with my patriarchal family. I work with women and all that has happened to me became keys to my work, like a curriculum that I needed to go through so I could do my work better. Its all a piece of the big puzzle and Im nothing but a humble apprentice of this divine orchestrated puzzle but what the fuckkkk

The UK doesn't have freedom of speech but freedom of expression technically, which is just a more broad definition. The UDHR recognizes that freedom of speech has limitations and need to be restricted. This law aims to curbs online harassment and abuse by regulating social media providers to better safeguard users, which is a good thing on paper in the absence of any kind of regulation. I do agree however that the stipulations around what is considered harmful is too vague currently. In practice it could result in social media platforms over censoring stuff to cover their asses but that is already kind of the case, with people self-censor to avoid getting flagged by saying stuff like "unaliving" instead of died/suicide. The UK still scores higher on freedom of expression than the US according to the Global Expression report (33th VS 88th). https://www.globalexpressionreport.org/

How can anybody get bored in this dramatic masterpiece called life. I know how. Bored of the dramatic masterpiece. It becomes the same ole, same ole masterpiece. Brilliant how the mind creates itself over and over again to make everything seem different and appear to be different. Imagine eating an orange everyday to infinity. Only an orange. Or watching the same one movie for eternity over and over. Imagine if we lived forever in this body/form. Imagine if suicide could never be accomplished and we had no choice but to be here in the same form forever. If you think you're depressed now, imagine that. Everyone would go insane. Life is just creating itself over and over and over again but with different content. That's where the mind comes in. Without that there wouldn't be any activity or movement. The mind is all that. The mind didn't create all that, the mind is activity and movement itself. It loves drama and creates it when it's bored. Bored with the same dance.

i know theres people who, they just are what they are, like... there are really trump-like-people out here making decisions based on pure blood lust and venegence tryina draw blood (and trust me i have first hand exp 10 years, for 24-7 hours) Tates just a little boy still playin with his toy cars or watever... anyway my points like, its not like im retarded, i see things, and i give them a chance, but i know that its like hey... there are real live ppl out here tryina bulldoze shit without any rhyme or reason, and it has nothin to do w/ america, and perhaps nothin' to do w/ their own well being either (more of like a suicide mission if you ask me). but if your like 78 years old tryina make moves like its the summer of 79', like... thats where im like, "timeout"... This is a 78—goin on 80 now in a couple years... what kindve like animalistic thing is, like, some 80 year old guy got to prove out in these streets. Like, its not like he's on crack otherwise he would be weighin in at 100 pounds, looking like unusually fit out-of-the-blue...it is very much true that—if no one has ever thought of just close-lining someone, then they might just go on as if they are unstoppable. but if your 80, youve surely been out here and have nothin to prove, or the chances should be so slim that its like ("yes, thank god. now im 80 years old, time to get to work tearin sh-- up!") that then implies orchestrating this unusual gutting of the government, etc, etc.. (etcetera etcetera, fading into infinity, because it continues to make less and less sense to me) and thats where im at. i know that this like, mid-life crisis attitude can go up to the 60's... but now we are talkin bout people 70—80 (its like a mid-life crisis, cause their sense of purpose is wrapped around the illusion that they are dominating in whatever field therein) Usually by 80 youve done lost enough to wake up. And of course, theres always some very slim chance that there is some purpose behind it, but its unlikely. If there was we would know what it was. the people that are his age are the ones who likely know how to untangle him, and the weird pride syndrome hes wrapped up in like, since they have been here long enough, they know what language hes speakin.

To children you tell necessary fiction so they mature and grow and only when they are mature enough you tell certain truths depending on the age and depending on the truth that needs to be delivered. God and his children (humanity) are no different. Christianity is necessary fiction for humanity to evolve and only when it reaches a certain maturation in the spiral dynamics it can be exposed to the naked truth. Just imagine your teachings becoming mainstream and pre-teens or teens using 5 MeO on massive scale. The amount of people committing suicide would be staggering if you extrapolate the amount of people who already committed suicide or going apeshit like that youtube fitness guy. Most people go to religion because they have problems. Giving 5 MeO to them is like putting a fire cracker in their ears. You are not doing God's work here. People like Jordan Peterson do God's work by keeping people alive and giving them meaning to fight to good fight. And after they healed themselves they could possible move to a higher truth. I hope you and Jordan Peterson should do a podcast together. It would be a blast to see. But probably you won't. And you should contemplate why.