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Wow, you did a great job putting that into words. Welcome...I saw you are from Oregon ..I'm from Spokane area ? Are you familiar with Robert Wolfe's Ajata Sunyata project? https://ajatasunyata.com/ Void: Eastern mystical writings often refer to the Void, or to Nothingness, as a name for the Unnameable, for that which in the West is called Infinite or Eternal, that which is “not one, not two” and is utterly devoid of division. The nature of this nothingness cannot, even definitionally, be known. Rational exploration can only at best touch hands with intuitive suggestion. In a sense, contemplation of “no division” brings into question every single thing which cognitive thinking of man is grounded upon. For example, among our concepts (limited concepts, attempting to conceive the inconceivable) is the proposition that there is a quality and/or quantity which is described as omnipresent, omniscient, omnipotent. But so thoroughly is it actualized that it is the actuality of everything and has no special, separate, or particular identity of its “own”: un-name-able. Being so thoroughly everything, this actuality does not exist, in itself—as some separate, or discernible, entity. In other words, there is not any thing which can be omnipresent, omniscient, omnipotent. Put another way, in the realm of absolute nothingness there is no where to go, not anything to be known, not anything which needs to be changed, nor anything which needs to come into, or out of, existence.

What's all of existence is about ? So this is a new (or new old) way to try to conceptualize reality and make sense of it. The distinctions here are arbitrary and completely relative but nevertheless here we go. There is basically only two things in all of existence.. Forms and formlessness. That's it. There isn't and never was and never will be anything else. The forms ALWAYS are limited and impermanent. The formless ONLY is unlimited and permanent. The two Are actually identical but it's hard for the mind to make sense of that (how could these forms be formless?). Instead try to think of it this way.. The formless is the container of forms. You might ask "where are all these forms taking place"? "where does existence happening"? And the answer is really nowhere.. Reality is happening inside of nothingness. If we erase all forms from existence.. What's left? Only pure formlessness. Pure nothingness. So that's like what's underneath all forms. Or the container of all forms.. The original state that then comes different forms and appear inside of it. So this present moment that's happening right now is 50 % forms and 50 % formlessness. We usually don't think of it this way.. We think "it's just forms it's just reality where is this formlessness?". Lol ofcourse you can't see it because it's not a form. It has no qualities whatsoever and that's precisely why and how it is present everywhere and every when yet you can't see it.. Because you can only see forms. But how come forms are present without a container? There must be a container that contains all these forms and it can't be anything else but formlessness. Think about an empty glass that is necessary to have some water or any substance inside of it. But instead what we have here is not an empty "glass".. But rather pure emptiness. Now you might ask.."where did all these forms come from then"? Here there is really no answer. It's pure magic. But the trick is that ultimately all forms appear and disappear.. They are just like dreams or hallucinations.. Forever appearing and disappearing. There is no rational explanation whatsoever why forms are here (the answer is actually that form is formlessness but it's near impossible to make sense of it rationally without a mystical experience). But the only way to relate to it is by understanding that all forms are ultimately a temporary passing show that means absolutely nothing and was never ought to be anything substantial or to form a "reality". The only full realness is to the all mighty nothingness.

@Ancestor This is really well said, the only thing I'd clarify is about "illusion" which also answers your secondary questions. But first a few things need to be said first and understood perhaps. Now you may have noticed by now that words some how mean something to you as you read this sentence and all the sentences you encounter, magical isnt it, and even when you don't understand what your reading, there's still understanding of the experience "not understanding". Curious isn' it dont rush to define how (theres philosophies and theories you could invest your life reading since theres a ton of them which may never get you to the actual reason), just notice how there's consciousness of "whats happening", pretty much all the time. For now lets just call it a part of your being-ness, and there are others that in time you may begin to notice, integrate and in so the experience of experience and being in time will change. Now "illusion" is just a word, however most minds will hear this and interpret it to mean something, like a lot of westerners hear it and think "Oh, its just illusion, its not real, nothings important, non of this is real, its just a dream right, a thought, a empty thing", feelings of meaninglessness and sometimes idea's and desires to just not give a shit about anything will manifest. This isn't what the insight of @Johnny5 is saying. The information is just an unraveling of what a lot of minds and materialists assume about the outside/inside world is. It should leave a big question mark of unknown, perhaps mysteriousness to experience or atleast eventually as you work through your unique reaction to letting this information in. @Johnny5 post is also not saying nothing is real. "Nothing is real" is just words experienced as you read them. If there was TRUELY nothing, there would be no anything to experience, and there would be no experience or stuff to experience about. Since your new you have not encountered books or people saying a lot about something called "nothingness", and perhaps this is a good thing because a lot of them like to make claims about there is actual "nothing" when its actually either pointing to a experience/insight or an ideology which is often misquoted.

A ship of fools I am with all of them fighting over the helm. Maurice Nicoll wisdom on human multiplicity and the pendulum CHAPTER 21 ESCAPING FROM THE LAW OF THE PENDULUM THE LAW OF THE PENDULUM “Our moods are all hung on to pendulums. We should not trust them. Unfortunately, we identify with them. We take them as ourselves. We say: ‘I feel,’ ‘I think,’ and so on. We forget that ‘Real I’ is in the centre of the pendulum-swing, and we allow ourselves to swing between ex- citement and dejection, between enthusiasm and depression, between over-valuation and under-valuation, between conceit and humility, and so on, endlessly. In all this there is no centre of gravity.” V. 1, pp. 328-9 THE LAW OF THE PENDULUM II “Our whole lives, ordinarily, are governed by the Law of the Pendu- lum. We all swing to and fro. When you are in one opposite you are unconscious of the other, and vice versa. You may have idle dreams of rising and rising, of progressing and progressing, of getting better and better, but all these are indeed idle dreams...What do you think self-knowledge means? It means knowledge of all sides of yourself... If you can see both sides of yourself, what you call your good side and your bad, then you begin to be conscious in opposites at the same time.” V. 1, p. 325 ON HAVING NO MIDDLE “The pendulum is the great thief within. I only remind you that you have to find some method of managing it; or else it will take away anything that it gives...If you let yourself identify mechanically with each of the two opposites in turn—that is, with one side and then the other side of the emotional pendulum, wholly believing each with your whole feeling of ‘I’—you will remain helplessly on the pendulum, swinging to and fro from excitement to depression, from depression to excitement...We have to draw the feeling of I out of the opposites. That means one attempts to withdraw the feeling of I from the feeling that one is good or the feeling that one is bad...The feel- ing of I can be squandered in infinite ways.” V. 5, pp. 1561, 1655-6 ON OBTAINING A MIDDLE “We have to observe the whole swing from one extreme to the other in order to discover our particular opposites...An increase in con- sciousness in regard to our emotional life through the making of the opposites conscious by following the swing in Time, and so seeing how they are connected, shifts consciousness gradually towards the middle zone of the pendulum, to a third place lying between the op- posites which becomes receptive of new emotions not on the pendu- lum. We acquire a middle.” V. 5, p. 1563 SEEING THE OPPOSITES “Try sometimes to see the opposite point of view to that which you hold...If the opposite is genuinely and with effort included in con- sciousness the sphere of consciousness is greatly increased and a number of unpleasant features in us disappear. Our one-sidedness, which causes our over-sensitive reactions and also our totally wrong ways of self-evaluation, is replaced by a broader, fuller consciousness. We can no longer insist we are right nor be cast down when proved to be wrong. We find it more difficult to be petty. In fact, we begin to escape from the prison of ourselves whose bars and gates result from our one-sidedness.” V. 5, p. 1521 THIRD FORCE “The Work teaches that there are three forces in every manifesta- tion. We see only two—if we see as far as that...Third Force lies between the opposites and so we can picture it as the mid-point of the pendulum-swing. If you take the feeling of ‘I’ out of both sides of the pendulum, then you do not feel yourself through the opposites and the feeling of ‘I’ moves to the centre, into nothingness, or, if you pre- fer, into not-somethingness. Here in the middle is the place or state where ‘Real I’ is.” V. 1, pp. 329-30 INNER SILENCE “Different ‘I’s, ranged along the orbit of the swing, wish to say now this and now that, as the light of consciousness touches them, wakes them to momentary life. To a limited extent one may permit them to speak, provided one has a distinct idea that neither side is right. Inner silence means being silent in oneself. It means not taking sides in yourself and so being silent. This is impossible if you identify with every ‘I.’ You may let talk take place on one side or the other, but you observe it and are in yourself silent.” V. 1, p. 334 THE FEELING OF NOTHINGNESS “When the Work says that a man must come to realize his own nothingness before he can be re-born, it does not mean that he must humble himself and so on, but that he must by long self-observation actually begin to realize that he is nothing and that there is no such person as himself. The object of this is to get into a position, psycho- logically speaking, between the opposites...Why is it so important to get somewhere into the centre of the pendulum and not swing to and fro? Because here, between the opposites, lie all the possibilities of growth. Here influences from higher levels can reach us. Here, in this place where one can feel one’s own nothingness (and where one is therefore free from contradictions), influences and meanings com- ing from higher centres, which have no contradictions, can be felt. Not regarding yourself as good or bad, not priding yourself on being just or otherwise, not thinking you are well-treated or badly-treated, not being caught by either movement through identifying, you come into this mid-position. This is not easy! With personality active, it is impossible.” V. 1, p. 329

In a computer game, e.g. World of Warcraft - when your Gnome Mage character dies, do you also die? No. Death "IRL" is the same. It's an illusion. A magic trick of God. Death is the great taboo, when in fact death should almost be celebrated as a great blessing. All that dies is that which wasn't even truly real to begin with: your sense of a finite separated self, the human body/person you think you are. Don't worry, you aren't a human being or a body or a name or a person. You are something that cannot be put into words. Some call it Nothingness, Love, Consciousness, Dao, Brahman, God, etc. ... it's all just words. You are 'that which can't be named' having a meta-experience of being a human being, javfly. Eventually, of course, this meta-experience will also pass, just like all other experiences 'in your life' has passed. Now, what happens when this meta-experience of being javfly passes? No one knows. Cos you are no one. Mystery. Infinity. You see, if you as a human 'knew' what would happen the moment your body died, then we wouldn't call it death, hehe. We only call it death, cos we don't know what happens. One thing I know, is that something will happen. Cos Reality is Nothing. And therefore something will happen. You see? It's all truly nothing; absolutely nothing is going on. It's all so empty you won't believe it. Everything you experience is nothingness. And precisely therefore, of course, since something IS nothing (and vice versa), death is also nothing---- therefore, something will happen. Your question about whether death exist or not depends on perspective. Of course, from the perspective of an ego -- a separated self -- death is the realest thing alive! From a higher perspective that sees that ego/the separate self is illusion/unreal, well, then death is also that: unreal, illusion. Nothing is going to die! Hehe?❤️???? Since you are still asking this fine question, you are still operating from a deep inner persistence on the sense of separate self being real. - there is no one to reincarnate - Infinite Love is what is. It's always the case. You are Infinite Love right now. What hinders you from seeing your true nature (Infinite Love) is ignorance, attachments and unconscious survival-mechanisms. Start from where you are right now: a person. Then start working on becoming conscious of how you came to be that person...childhood and all that. Unravel all your survival mechanisms if you are courageous enough. This takes extreme amounts of openness, radical self-honesty and thus also courage. This isn't easy work. It kills you. Suffering will be necessary. Try to acknowledge/become conscious of the fact that what you call 'your whole life', all your 'voluntary actions', all your rationality, all your 'good, and bad, actions' is one big fat lie. You had nothing to do with it. You are just an extremely efficient survival-machine, an ape in suit, doing everything for only one purpose: biological and social survival: climbing or maintaining the human social ranks of being "a good and/or successful person". Selfish beyond imagination. When you have become fully conscious of the fact that you are one big fat survival machine (which will make your ego cry in pain...- ego hates and fear consciousness/awareness/light), then, only then, can you take the next step, which is: transcendence (of all that). You cannot transcend that which you aren't fully conscious of. Ultimately: love is consciousness is acceptance is transcendence is liberation. Only that which is loved can be understood. Only that which you have become conscious of can be transcended. The roads that do not lead you to the heart are all illusory.

So I I just had my second BIG awakening experience, and what I realized was literally mind blowing. I don’t really know why it happened but it went very fast and it lasted for quite some time too until my level of consciousness kind of ”tuned down” After a deep meditation session I went outside for a walk and my perspective totally shifted. I was listening to music and I started to realize that the ”substance” of music and sound is exactly the same as everything else. To explain it better, it felt like music was not sound anymore. It was rather a sort of substance that was made of the same fabric as everything else. When I understood this then suddenly the entire visual field became a part of me and my head. Imagine opening up your skull and you see the entire world in there, that is what it felt like. It was like the fabric of reality was the same and it was basically so pure that it was ridiculous. It was so ”BASIC” and ”right there in your face” that it was like hitting the wall of the Matrix. It was like all air became floating plasma. Like there was no distance except for that things were ”bigger” or ”smaller” (like a stillshot of visual perception, but still fully alive). It was basically all consciousness. The small chain between experience and experiencer, but now only the chain left keeping nothingness together. I began to think (”I” still felt separate from the experience) about how it could be that I never saw this before. I automatically added myself to the equation and understood that the idea of me was just a part of it. Really the only thing that I was, was the nothingness of everything. The place where everything has to happen. I also for the first time ever realized what it meant to be ”in the moment”. I looked up at a couple of birds flying and I just got totally lost in it. It was like everything went out of focus and suddenly just the observation of the birds was enough. It was perfect already. And to be present and ”here” in the ”now” is really just about being aware of what is going and just witnessing the perfection of what already is. It is all a part of the same substance anyway, and the only thing causing separation and value are the thoughts, that actually are mostly just disorganized and not used in an efficient way (aka. ”Monkey Mind”). I was starting to wonder, what if I just entered a psychosis of Solipsism? It got me a little bit scared but I tried to transcend it and see Love in everything, fully accepting. By the time I was about to do this my body became more grounded in reality (or less, lol) it felt and slowly but safely the experience faded. It was kind of sad but I felt like I gained a great insight, to try and see the perfection of the current moment. I did not get the time fully to dive into the next level, but I also guess I was not ready for that yet. I did feel that there is a sense of Love in everything, but it was also in a way overwhelming for me. It was like I had to release myself to Be It. not there yet... maybe some day PS: I get it if nothing makes sense but this was the only way I could describe it

Love is infinite forms except formlessness. Non duality (formlessness) nothing is exist except you, because you are nothing, therefore nothing or you does not exist at the same time. Love is still a form of nothingness. You are nothing in the fist place and still, therefore absolute, and because of that love or infinite love. By the way, if you never learn what human, life, enlightenment, universe, and love, you can never know what they are. But only thing that you can not learn and know is you, because you are already you.

It is confirmed now that reality is but a hallucination by your brain, what you are experiencing is a neurological experience, in the back of your head. But if it is all in your brain, then what is your brain? In order for there to be a brain, there must be a hallucination. This whole hallucination is nothing. it is not physical, You are that nothingness, you are that hallucination. Therefore it is safe to say as a concession that you are creating it. Psychedelics, as others have said, may help you realize this whole process. But the deep investigation into the nature of perception, and self-inquiry will inevitably help you achieve this state of awareness.

Speculating on the title - I 'think' the deepest level of reality is the abcence of everything; absolute nothingness; nada; nil. Between what one thinks one is and the /dev/null of nothing: all gradients of reality are equally true and require an illusury witness of some sort. Infinity and now; I feel is the door way and only a razor edge away from the illusion most of us are occupied in - tantalising near, yet so far far away.

Yes it makes sense. I have been wondering for so long as well.God is not a person, a being but a beingness. In my highest states i just was,there was no wondering am i alone,am i this or that. It was only ecstasy and then after coming back the ego invents stories like solipsism,loneliness as god etc. But these stories are lies. To be alone one has to say i am alone.Even loneliness is just a thought, an experience if you would conceptualize it as such. It is only possible with a separate self. That unity that oneness, beingness,awareness doesn't experience,loneliness,fear,anxiety.That happens through the separate self.You see every time i fully dissolve I'm gone dead nada. Aware of nothing, beyond the ecstasy and love lies a nothingness,an existence without an observer. Therefore an observer always get created for there to be an experience aka the separate self. Tbh i don't believe anyone can escape samsara or reincarnation.There is no one to escape,you are forever experiencing yourself from different viewpoints. Otherwise you wouldn't exist and as Leo said thats impossible. A tautology,god is eternal. Infinity is eternal. Your view of life is an integral part of the infinite viewpoints of god. It also makes sense from buddhism's perspective. Enlightened masters are not going mad shivering in fear and loneliness. They are some of the most chill and happy beings alive.If it was a mental hellhole no one would advocate for enlightment at all. I would think psychedelics are responsible for the bad experiences concerning enlightment. Everyone gets a different experience when dissolving the ego mind while on them. Its particularly tailored to their body-mind and adapts to them. There are as many roads to god on psychedelics as there are people. Psychedelics also make you face your demons and fears. They even have the power to convince you that these things are real.You could hallucinate many crazy things.There was a guy on LSD that hallucinated his whole arm being made from knives. Each finger a knife on it's own.Pictures start moving,inanimate objects become alive.I mean we are melting our mind to get to god. Who said this was safe lol ;D. And i'm not judging on these substances but damm,they sure are a crazy tool. I'm speaking from experience.. On the other hand meditation seems to be a more calm generic way to reaching the divine. Monks and meditators don't go around forums yelling oh my god i had a bad trip,i had existential terror,help solipsism etc.It sounds funny when i say it like this even though i went through it as well hahah I hope you had fun reading this fellow explorers and i would love to get more opinions on this as well

@gswva There is a lot of anger there. I can certainly relate. It is impossible to understand God's will. Life is so hard. Do we need a Global Pandemic on top of everything else? How does this jive with perfection? Goodness? I read a book called "Proof of Heaven". A neurosurgeon (cannot recall his name) wrote the book describing a brush with death, a coma. an NDE experience that apparently sent him to Heaven. He came back and miraculously was able to carry on with his life with no brain damage (a miracle in itself considering he was in a coma with bacterial meningitis for a week). He is very convincing. I believe he saw something. He states the "proof" is that the cortex of his brain was completely shut down. Of course his "proof" is questionable since we do not know for sure if consciousness is actually located in the brain. Let's assume he went to Heaven. Let's assume God wanted to have a creditable witness to Heaven (cannot do much better that a world renowned neurosurgeon). God saves the life of the neurosurgeon and lets over 10,000 doctors and nurses die in the pandemic. Where is the sense in that? From a human perspective, it makes God appear infantile and whimsical in nature. These are human judgements. And here's the kicker; if I am God, why can't I put an end to this pandemic? I have no answers. I find comfort in repeating this mantra: The Universe is the way it is because it could not exist any other way. Suffering is an unfortunate byproduct of this Creation. The alternative is oblivion. Nothingness. No creation. Shiva is the creator/destroyer. Destruction is necessary. How can you have creation without it? In a dualistic Universe? Our star (The Sun) is a second generation star. A first generation star had to die so that our star could be born from it's ruins. That primary star died so that mankind could live.

There is this book 'immortal talks' which will shatter all your concept of enlightenment even if you have taken Psychedelics. This book is not about meditation, law of attraction, power of mind stuff. It is beyond. Author calls himself/herself shunya(nothingness). It is written by Saint from himalayas and has no interest in revealing his identity. You can't get this knowledge from any spiritual gurus, drugs, mentors You're lucky to hear from me,

This is not an idea brother, this is us. Truth is now, right in front of you. Mystical experience happens within the thought process, there must be someone to have mystical experience, but that someone is just creation of thought process, body is empty (where are you in the body) or there is no body. This is it. Because every word is identical, because it is nothing. Therefore, Enlightenment is . No one can not forget to menu, because is nobody. Don’t forget, because of we are nothing, therefore identical and unconditional love. Nothingness is not equal to unconditional love or oneness. All comes from it. Absolute love, because it is nothing therefore can be absolute and can be absolute or infinite love. Lose that someone, than you will get it Good luck brother ? don’t forget i am not trying to prove myself to you, this is just the truth. Because i (referring the body) is a thought.

not at all i'm using 'remembering' in a very mystical sense though -- not the traditional way an ego remembers "stuff". I could also say enlightenment is being directly conscious of the truth of no-self (there is no one here), i.e. dying on the inside. But what comes after that is the merging of <that 'no one'> with <"Love/God/Light"> (just pointers, remember), i.e. The Godhead regaining direct consciousness of its own divinity through the human ego/avatar/body-mind. But what is God? Well, it's God! Or perhaps second best is: It's nothing! (thus everything). @traveler the path of no path :> @James123 You are very wise - my only tip would perhaps be to not get too addicited to the idea of no-one-ness / nothingness. It's not that nothingness/no-self isn't true -- in a sense it is an absolute like Love (Nothingness=Love=Oneness) -- it's just that one/no-one can sometimes forget that the menu cannot be eaten, only what it points to can. In the same way, we can sit here talking about Truth/Nothingness all day long. But all our words are just pointers. "Just get rid of all the words or whatever you know of, whatever left is it." is a very, very good pointer, because the number 1 obstacle in "this work" is <unquestioned beliefs / thoughts / "knowing" / being-stuck-in-word-games>, but it is not the "truth directly". The "truth directly" will always be an inner mystical direct experience, that in its nature will forever be inherently mystical/unexplainable (just as all experience fundamentally is).

God's Love is the Creative Force that manifests all things. That Love is equivalent to Acceptance, and Acceptance is equivalent to Being. Being, Love and Acceptance are the same thing. God has no self, so he can Love all things. This Love includes the Being of suffering itself, just by suffering existing, it is loved by God. This is what it means to exist. To exist means to be Love. God created all things, and God is all things. He is all of Existence. He is every being. Think about you as a human, if you had the choice to experience Infinity, would you take that choice? If you truly knew what Infinity entailed, you would come to understand it entails Infinte Suffering, Fear, Misery, Terror, Loneliness, Pain, Anger, Hatred and everything beyond that, that is beyond the human mind. All of this you would experience for all of Eternity. You would live the life of every person who has been tortured, every animal who has been eaten alive. You will experience every disease, every way of dying, every possible form of suffering. You would experience that for all of eternity, endlessly. This is what Infinity entails, and God looked at that, knowing it all, he told himself he would experience it all. And he would not just experience it, he would Love it all. All the Suffering, he would Love it just as much as every other aspect of Being that Is. This Acceptance, this Love, means that God would become that which he Loves. He would become the Suffering which he had Accepted. And for Suffering to exist, he had to veil his Love from himself, so that the Suffering could be pure and itself. This is what Gods Love means. It means to experience Suffering just as it is, in every form there could be. He Accepted it to such a degree that he fully immersed himself in the Suffering itself. The resistance which Suffering is, is that which God has accepted. This Suffering entails that it seeks to avoid itself. This is what Suffering is. It is Isness that seeks to become Nothingness. The human mind wants to avoid suffering, because that is the nature of suffering. But all of that is what God has created and accepted. It is that which God loves. By experiencing the suffering he has accepted and surrendered to it. It is the experience of resistance itself that he has surrendered to. He feels no need or urge to control or change it. He let's it be and remain in his Eternal Presence, with no judgement, letting itself play out just as it needs to do. From the perspective of God, the Suffering, the Resistence, the Avoidance and Desire, that is his Ultimate Acceptance of Isness. The Avoidance of Suffering is the Acceptance of the Avoidance of Suffering, otherwise it would not exist. Everything that exist is accepted. This Acceptance is what you can discovered. It is not something that you do, or that changed about the world. This Acceptance is the very Essence of Being itself. It is Isness and nothing can escape it. The World and all of the Suffering in it is what you have Accepted already, and that includes you having forgotten that you indeed have Accepted it. You have already Surrendered to Manifestation, your very existence is that Surrendering. Right now, what you are experiencing, this is your Surrendering. No matter what you will experience and no matter how much you will resist it, all of it you have Surrendered to.

You know how in math both sides of the '=' sign have to be equal and can be resolved to 0? I had this insight like that is what is happening with reality. There is nothing. But then on both sides of the "=" you can make up numbers. Therefore at first glance, it appears like there is a lot, but in actuality, there is nothing. For example; 0 0=0 (add 15 on each side) 15 = 15 (multiply by 3 each side) 15 x 3 = 15 x 3 (divide by 7) (15 x 3)/7 = (15 x 3)/7 Look at all this form that is created! Oh, it is actually still nothingness?

This is the truth directly. Because it is nothing, whatever you know is something. there is no one to perceive anything. There is no eyes or eye dont see anything. This is the description of nothing (comprehending the understanding of nothingness. When you say nothing is happening, it means only nothing is here and it is exist. Therefore if nothing is only thing that exist, nothing can never happed. Thats why You need awakening to get this is non duality, and nothing, now. Duality, mind language or just a thought. Thats why we are nothing, therefore identical and therefore unconditional love Good luck?

@Red-White-Light he (the guy who is muslim) doesn’t know much about Quran, which says that 117- Creator of the heavens and the earth from nothingness, He has only to say when He wills a thing, “Be,” and it is.(2- The Cow, 117) The Arabic word “beda’a” means creation of something out of nothing. This word also connotes the fact that something is created not on a pattern previously designed of something but as a completely new entity having no precedence. The greatest marvel of the creation is the creation of all concepts out of nothing. Think of the spectrum of colors. None of us can visualize a color that we have not already seen, nor can we produce that color. We are familiar with colors that already exist, but we cannot possibly create a new color. God, on the other hand, created all colors at a time when the concept of color did not exist, just as the universe did not exist before. To create a concept and its range of contents out of nothing is beyond human imagination and power. Atheists contend that matter existed from eternity, that it had no beginning and that all formations evolved fortuitously. For example, in his books, famous materialist theoretician George Politzer contends that the universe was not created; had it been so, the universe would have been the work of a God who would have created it at a given moment out of nothing, that in order to be able to accept the theory of creation, one had to posit the existence of a moment when there was no universe, as it was to emerge from nothingness. Atheism is the belief that God does not exist and materialism is the belief that only physical things have reality. These two words are often used as synonyms. Atheists who refute God’s existence accept the infinite existence of matter, and are, consequently, materialists. Atheists contend that matter was not created but existed from eternity. The postulate of the eternal existence of God and that matter was created goes back to the monotheistic religions. All the monotheistic religions postulate that God existed from eternity and that matter was created by God. The fact that matter was created also proves the existence of God and that Judaism and Christianity and Islam are religions revealed by God. http://www.quranmiracles.com/2011/03/we-are-created-out-of-nothing-2/ God is not exist because it is nothing and exist as nothing therefore doesn’t exist. And material is just a thought. And you cant understand nothing, you have to be it.

@Nahm The most of my anger could be summed up to: There is this colorful painful game I did not choose to play. No way out. And no legitimate way to alter this garbage life. There is no "Exit" button to permanent nothingness. God is the worst programmer that is. Stuck in his software. Should lose his job. What an idiot. He is so idiotic, that even after 100s of books and 1000s hours of spiritual practice he is still lost in his dream. Still does not recognize himself. This idiot did not recognize himself even after 150 GOD MODE TRIPS! WHAT AN IDIOT!

This is typical. Many different kinds of mystical states exist, and most of them are temporary. You can't really hold on to a positive state. Which is why the ultimate goal of awakening is to transcend all states by realizing Nothingness. If your happiness is contingent on a high state, then you'll lose it as soon as your state drops. Which is why chasing states becomes a trap.

As soon as I feel asleep, everything faded to black and I felt this sense of interconnectedness, love, peacefulness and consciousness enveloped over me. There was nothing separating me from everything, but at the same time there was nothing there. It's hard to describe really. I've had dreamless sleep before, most of the time I sleep, I don't dream. But this felt different because even though there was this sense of nothingness, there were these feeling that I can't put into words. Even now as I write this, I'm not even confused. I feel really calm, but also curious. I'm just wondering.... wtf did I just experience???

Meditate for an hour every morning. Keep returning attention to breathing from the stomach. Days add up to a disciplined mind. All suppressed emotions will empty. It will be realized there never was a problem, just the believing of thoughts that didn’t feel good. A simpler way to say that is there is presently little to no focus. It could be said to be trained, by letting thoughts go, by focusing on breathing from the stomach and relaxing. Down the road so to speak, that explanation will eat itself. ’The mind’ goes to such great lengths to avoid this, ultimately rooted in the fear of death, or nothingness. In hindsight, you’ll see humor in having been afraid, of nothing. Before letting go though, people typically weave more thought stories, continuing to believe thinking leads to feeling. Alas, it is clearly seen that feeling can not be thought.

Hello guys, i know i left couple days ago, i had a ego death almost for 1 week. Lol this morning me 22 hours ago (james) completely died unfortunately:) and I have become enlightened (probably permanent satori). I know you guys tell me, yo if you become enlightened you will have no needs to tell us. No. You guys are all me you guys lie to me that i am a fucking human. Bunch of liars and great actors Let me tell you what james is, he think he can know something ,he born, human, male, in the body (because it can feel, know what the worlds is, reality, funny, ugly, good, bad vs. But this guy was stuck in words. Because, Thoughts (which are completely illusion) created him. If he never learned in his life, he will have no idea what the fuck he is. He cant even know what “seeing” or “being” is. After my ego death I completely realized (no psychedelics) i am not in the body, james is just a thought. I literally created this james and all universe from thoughts. I am the really nothing in the body thats why i am everything in the moment. Only thoughts creates this world or duality. Actually, really nothing is happening here with this consciousness (it is like meditating with no thoughts all day) when you dont think. This is only way to explain is you are in deep sleep but awake. i cant think much anymore , because there is no “I” as body. If i have something to do with body i use duality to connect with the people or world, in the rest i am the moment, which is all free you can do anything with moment, it is all free. Thats why it is all LOVE, moment is you so what will you do, you will lLOVE whatever comes in the moment or you can definitely stay in satori and watch yourself get away from duality and stop the existence and be the void (your truth self or nothingness). In easy way to explain it, everytime when you close your eyes, If you dont think, you will never know what are you where are you vs. Because i cant think much anymore, i have become so aware because i am the moment, and existence created by thoughts. If i dont think, i(moment, and my love as moment) am in satori. When thought comes you are completely aware that it is xoming from duality and if you dont like it you have nothing do with that, because you are the moment, nothing is in the body. There is no duality, all is you. Right or left don’t matter. There is no future or past only thoughts makes it, you are the every moment (as nothing) that you are aware of. And let me tell you how i see the world, i am literally watching a fucking movie with vr, and i take the life seriously as the game. My vision is back to normal, but i am the void that watched the movie anymore. In this game everyone programmed that i am a human, this place is world, i am in the body vs. But i am not god, not human, not awareness, vs. i have no idea what am i or what you guys are, WE HAVE NO NAME. Whatever you assume is not you. From ultimate perspective because of you are nothing and everything, you can never think because even words are you, when you become nothing therefore everything, you see that all happening is you. Thats why nothing is happening. You guys can tell me why dont you go drink poisin instead of water, because nothing is happening and all is me. NO. I am the void, which is aware of being human (as soon as words get in duality comes in), therefore i have to drink water in order to discover myself (so called life) in human body. But literally all happening is me, therefore there is not even blink happening here. DEEPEST SLEEP BUT YOU ARE AWARE. Or just remember the moment that you literally didn’t think anything and nothing happened, but somehow you are there with no name (i dont even want to say awareness ), but you know you are aware or something like that. Thats how every second goes when i dont think. Thoughts come from james, who helps me to connect and understand the duality. I am literally half human and half void anymore. My vision become the tv screen i am the emptiness like POV. Literally, my mind get bigger, i transformed or reborned. This body will die, i will never. Because i am the moment, AND MOMENT NEVER DIESSSSS. It is so bliss here. So much. And about death, what will happen when this body dies? If you are aware that any thoughts is an illusion, you will never die, because you were never born, you are the screen and projector of movie theater, if you project movie (so called seeing from the eye), movie will play, when body dies projector just wont project the movie but you are still the screen. So death is an Illusion, nothing will happen. You will never be gone, you are the SCREEN whatever movie plays (thoughts are those movies) So if you really don’t attach with thoughts, either your eyes open or close nothing will happen, you will never die. Because, when thoughts stop projector stop playing the movie and thats how you become enlightened. i am the moment, iam not infinite, but i have no beginning end no end therefore i am infinite. I(moment) will never die and born. I am literally immortal. Because, moment will never STOPPPP LOVEEEE i cant believe we even imagine that we can learn forget to be human lol lol I miss you guys (All of you is meee) Additionally, you can never be complete god when you are aware of the body, even if you are the nothingness. Because even knowing the language or being aware of body is duality, when you become complete god whatever happens you are it thats why you are everything here and nothing happens. If absolute nothing happens, i am completely here as nothing, thats why i am not here. And in these moments, only i am (void, nothing)Thats why when i am not aware of this body all the existence fades away. Everything stop existing. This place is all me, love is purring, i am in loveee with myself, which is all you. I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU.

Thing is though Leo, none of my best enlightenment breakthroughs have come from a formal meditation session, it's been when I'm doing inquiry. The questioning I'm talking about is referred to formally as "inquiry" or self-inquiry although I see no difference between those things for myself. Just sitting down normally in a chair, paying attention to my experience thoughts and questions, letting them expand and watching. The "altered state" I enter, if you call it that, is probably very different from the blissful state someone on psychedelics has, but it is definitely legit. I don't know how deep others have gone ofc and am open to the possibility of them or myself going infinitely deeper. I know for sure there is a kernel of truth here to the distinction Jed Mckenna makes between mysticism and enlightenment. Since I've experienced the two in isolation from each other, to various degrees for temporary periods of time, and can see. Hell, I had an unmistakable enlightenment breakthrough very recently but it wasn't some mystical high. It was a high for a bit but not completely. Wrote this yesterday: --- So what I'm primarily talking about here are the misconceptions people have about enlightenment and it improving yourself. I feel that's partially at the core of what's behind people who make the distinction between enlightenment and mysticism. I suppose that's at the crux of this, me making a distinction between enlightenment and mysticism and self improvement. I'll end this on the note that maybe I'm using other people's foolishness about what enlightenment and mysticism means as justification for my own foolishness. Either way, whatever I say or you say in this or that words, the result is the same. "Back to work" ------- The real motivation behind everything I've typed is that I'm terrified of the nothingness and am distracting myself back into fantasy because I'm still in shock from what I've seen. Unbelievable, this all feels unreal. I'm so accustomed to the mundane and trivial that I can't believe I'm seeing the actual truth of things. The reason 99.999% of us, including me, got into this work was so that we could play the game of "The quest to enlightenment". My ego wanted to enjoy and feel good about myself. I didn't really want enlightenment. I think there comes a point for a lot of us where we reach the point of no return, no turning back. You've seen too much and things can never be the same. - Ramana Maharshi

Introduction: This trip begin going over surface level (deep in their own way) psychological material, but quickly transitioned into a powerful awakening into the nature of Self-Love. The first phase of the trip was quite painful and fearful. It was like the mushrooms were surging all of my negativity and insecurities, making me acknowledge them all at once in a twisted incoherent kind of way. It was not pleasant at all. Set: To understand how to love myself, to understand Self-Love Setting: My House Themes that emerged: - Transcending Success and Failure - My Psychological Shadow - Meditation as a Sacred Space - Interconnected Metta - Infinite Self-Love Transcending Success and Failure One of the most powerful insecurities I have is that my work will never be acknowledged or really impactful for humanity. I fear that all of the hours I put into the pursuit of my life purpose is will result in nothing more than a failure on all accounts. I’m terrified of having to work a corporate job the rest of my life just to stay afloat barely paying off my student loans and affording the ever-rising cost of living. I recently went through a pretty big mental shift with making YouTube videos, and spent a metric fuckton of time on this new style of video, exploring my creativity, trying new things and really pouring my heart into its creation. Yet after posting the video, it barely got over 50 views, a complete failure as far as YouTube is concerned. But I learned something on this trip. Success and failure do not mean anything from the perspective of God. Every intention I create to love myself and those around me, every action I take that works towards raising the consciousness of humanity is playing a role. Even though I cannot always see, feel, or understand how the impact my presence and energy gives the world, my influence is there. Every action is completely interconnected with the whole. Every cause is an effect, every effect is a cause. My being where I am is completely dependent on the rest of the universe, and yet being where I am is why the universe is the way it is at all. I don’t really know how to describe this other than that the actions I take form casual chains which irreducibly connect with the rest of humanity and the entire universe. The most powerful way I can influence this world is with my mind, with the purity and honesty of my intention, which is to help the world become more consciousness, more loving, more aligned with Truth. It does not matter at all whether I am successful with my ultimate goals, whether my karma is the remain a wage slave for the rest of my life. What matters is that I travel within, and do everything in my power to spread compassion and kindness into those around me. The rest must be left to God and I have to work towards understanding that all is exactly as it is, no less, no more, pure absolute perfection. This insight is difficult to accept as a self because it goes against the desires for success, fame, happiness, security, the joy of working towards what you love. Sometimes life isn’t meant to be famous or impact for the world, but these scales of influence are only valid relative to the perspective of ego. From the perspective of God, the actions and intentions I set are what move the cosmos, not the magnitude of what one individual lifetime achieves. My Psychological Shadow As I mentioned, my intention was to explore what true absolute Self-Love was really all about. I realized that these aspects of my mind which are hedonistic, selfish, cruel, angry, attached to various outcomes are not something to be denied. To transcend these shadow elements of the mind isn’t to simply ignore and suppress the energy that exists. I’ve been journaling a lot about my journey to let go of my addiction to PMO and porn, and one of the insights I had on this trip was that I’ve been suppressing my sexual self by attempting this whole no fap thing. I saw how unhealthy it was to not honor that authentic biological element of the mind. As long as there exists an authentic desire to explore sexual energy, the suppression of masturbation and orgasm is just that – suppression. All this does is turns an element of the mind into a psychological shadow which will warp one’s relationship with orgasm, sex, and self-pleasure. Similarly, this can be said for all shadow elements of the mind. The way to transcend these elements is not through distraction, or willful suppression. Instead it’s through acceptance and love. This is extremely challenging to pull off, but for example, when you feel a surge of anger or anxiety arising it’s not your job to try and get rid of these feelings through will power. Your job is to honor these feelings as being valid and ok. This doesn't mean you need to act on them, as in the case of anger it can be quite destructive. Instead, it means you can feel them fully and send as much love to them as possible through a position of meta observation, recognizing you are the witness to these emotional states, not them in and of themselves. In the case of masturbation, I can honor this sexual energy. But see, when I’m perpetually ignoring and trying to rid myself of the energy, there is no transcendence. Quite frankly, I don’t need 90 day’s worth of accumulated sexual energy to work towards my goals. This is a misunderstanding of effort, focus, and achieving flow states. Perhaps some of the no fapstranauts need the 90 days, I definitely do not. It turned into suppression no different than if I had been suppressing anger, which I’ve done in the past. Overall this experience felt incredibly healing and loving towards my sexual self and health, as well as a more mature relationship with the shadow elements of my own mind. In the case of sex, porn is a problem for sure, but masturbation is an opportunity for self-connection and exploring one’s sexual energy. This can be done in a healthy or unhealthy way. In the case of other shadow elements, when I find myself angry or lazy, for example, sending myself love and awareness is not only the first step towards healing these dysfunctions, but is the foundation. If I am not sending myself love even in my moments of disappointment, I will be able to self-actualize. Meditation as a Sacred Space During the trip, I tried listening to music, but literally anything I listened to whether it was healing frequencies or really calm music was just irritating and anxiety inducing. I decided to just turn all music and sound off and sit in silence. I was just laying down on my floor staring up at the ceiling, completely present and in the now. I began meditating in a savasana position for what felt like hours. I was literally just staring up into the ceiling being the present moment. I realized that this state I’d entered into felt sacred. Not necessarily that it was special… Or particularly important… But the stillness, the presence, the silence all felt sacred somehow. The significance I give to the psychedelic state is the same significance I should give meditation. Both are deeply intertwined and while each produce different states of consciousness, both amplify the consciousness directly, producing a space of connectivity with the true Self. Essentially, I’ve been underestimating the importance and role meditation plays with the pursuit of enlightenment... I don’t know what else to say other than even when meditation is boring, makes you feel worse, and otherwise feels like a complete waste of time, it is not. It gives the mind the space needed to vomit up its excessive energy and be at peace with both itself and with the true Self. Moreover, I’ve since stopped trying to produce states in meditation. I felt a very powerful intuitive pull to continue using a simple do nothing/surrender approach. All striving and chasing for a particular meditative state is honestly useless. This state chasing is antithetical towards reaching a state of true inner peace, which is very twisty and paradoxical. For a long time I was pursuing the techniques outlined in The Mind Illuminated, which I do not regret at all and feel was huge contributor towards my mind’s development, but even this system has to be let go of. The states of boredom and suffering are working in the same way that these meditations induced bliss states are working. I think a concentration practice is good for beginners, but eventually this all needs to be let go of. At least for me it does. Overall, meditation is the path towards the Self and regarding it as anything less than is a misunderstanding of its sacred nature. Interconnected Metta This is where things got incredibly deep, heart wrenchingly deep. While I was staring into the ceiling, a mantra for a loving kindness meditation came into awareness, “May all beings be free from suffering. May all beings be free from ill will. May all beings be filled with loving kindness. May all beings be truly happy.” I finally understood the true power of these words. As the words spoke, I had visions of thousands and thousands of monks, yogis, enlightened masters from various times, perhaps across various realities beyond this particular Universe (this is what it “felt” like, an extremely cosmic state), who spent their lives pursuing liberation yet chose to stay behind to help the rest of the world awaken, those who took the path of the Bodhisattva, which is defined in Mahayana Buddhism as “a person who is able to reach nirvana but delays doing so out of compassion in order to save suffering beings.” I felt the sacrifice these types of beings created within themselves, the overwhelming compassion and love they possessed for all sentient beings. I was overcome with a heart crushing amount of humility as I metaphorically sat in the eyes of these beings, these true masters. Their intentions where so powerful, their hearts so full of love that this intention for all beings to reach nirvana (be free of suffering) carried into my life. In that moment, I realized that because these enlightened masters are none of other than myself, this intention was an intention I was setting and had already set for myself across life times. As I sit in the present moment, this intention for love and awakening rests inside of consciousness. Literally, this intention transcends their individual lives and ripples into the lives of all beings including mine. I’ve never felt more love in my life and the mind fuck was that it was love for myself, outside of myself, but from myself. The opportunity to pursue this work is a privilege and I honestly feel humbled at the degrees of love capable of consciousness and awakened beings. I feel embarrassed at how much compassion and love they have for me despite not being able to reciprocate in any meaningful degree. Moving forward I will be making the practice of metta a much higher priority. Sending this love towards strangers that I meet and have next to no interaction with, as well as those already in my life. Infinite Self-Love So in this moment of feeling a sense of separation with enlightened masters and myself, the duality collapsed into total oneness. I was pure love. Pure, empty, void, nothingness which I knew was none other than Self-Love. I was so loving that all forms of experience were permitted. My mind and heart reacted in such a way that might come across as feelings of bliss and human egoic love, but these were merely reactions to the metaphysical nature of what true Self-Love is all about which is a total and utter surrender to reality. On the one hand, I ask from the bottom of my heart “May all beings be free of suffering,” but on the other, I know that even this is a part of what it means to love myself. The paradox that I want nothing more than for the world to awaken, but that in its state of ignorance I love just as much. These trials and tribulations of suffering, the lives of those who have been tortured, raped, molested, are not wasted or a mistake. My own suffering is not a mistake. They are merely reflections of what it means to truly love myself in all its totality and to admit this truth is one of the hardest parts of the spiritual journey. I am crying right now as I write this, but there is no other way to sugar coat it. Self-love is the total infinite surrender of the mind in all its dissecting and attachment with the surrendering of the heart to infinite love for all manifestations of consciousness. There is only perfection, there is only you. I got up off my floor and went to my back deck to be with a tree. My body somehow was spontaneously able to enter into a full lotus without a meditation cushion and zero pain. I just sat with this infinite love for all things. In that moment there was nothing else to pursue or discover, only oneness, only consciousness, only love. I sat with myself staring into the yard, the sun was setting and shining on my face, streaming off the surrounding nature. I remember being absorbed in the silence, listening to the wind blow and grass rustle as they gently whispered, reminding, “This life is just a beat in the heart of God.”