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This is the mortal dream and all the nonsense going on will keep us dreaming longer and longer. The foolishness that´s going on, the fighting, the anger, and all the nonsense going on with every day, keep us bound to this mortal dream. • In other words, when you're sleeping, you're dreaming, and dreams seem real to you, then you awaken. So it is with this world. You're dreaming the mortal dream. You think it's real. You get involved in it, and you're caught up in it, and it gets worse and worse. You just have to realize it's a dream and wake up. And what happens when you wake up? You do not find yourself in a place called heaven, in a strange land. You'll be as you are. When you awaken, you will function as you do now. Except you'll know you're playing a part. That's the only difference.The only difference between you and an awakened person is that you figure the part you're playing is real. And to an awakened person it's a play, a show, a dream. Does an awakened person take a part in the dream? He plays the part that was given to him or her. But he is always happy, always peaceful. For it's all an act on the stage. He's playing a part. So why get angry, why get upset? As you get angry and upset, you know it's a part you are playing, it's a part that you choose. To be an angry person, an upset person, as long as you know the part that you're playing is not real, it's okay to be upset, it doesn't matter. For again you know it's only a part you're playing. But when you think it's real, then you get pulled back into the mire, and you have to start all over again. In other words if you want to become free and liberated in this life, you don't have anything to do with the part, the play, the movie. It’s all good indeed. But when you get caught up in it, then you have to play the part again and again and again. It is called karma and reincarnation. As long as you feel the world is real, people are real, things are real, you have to keep playing your part over and over again. But when you get to the point where you give up, and just focus on reality. You focus on reality when you realize it's all a dream. Then you become free and liberated. So freedom and liberation, it's not something foreign. It’s not far away from you. It’s right where you are, and where you see life. That's all awakening is. So you observe the life. How do you see your life right now? If what you can say about yourself, you feel bad, you feel limited, slighted, upset, then you have to turn around by realizing that you have chosen this world of play. You have chosen this world. It’s your play, and accept it. But do not react to it. It's reaction that causes the problem. We´ll keep on dreaming until we let go. Stop fighting. Become non-attached, then we´ll awaken and be free. Robert Adams, T245: Consciousness Is The Silence

Someone has asked me to speak about the dream state versus the waking state. So I'll mumble a few words about those things: First of all, to a Jnani, to a Sage, there's no dream state and there's no waking state. None of those exists for the Sage. But for the ajnani there appears to be a dream state and a waking state. And the remarks that are made is this: "The waking state appears to be long. It appears to go on forever. But the dream state ends." And as a matter of fact, you have about eight, nine dreams a night. You usually only remember the last one. So how can I say that the waking state is a dream state also? Well, let's look at it this way. In what you call the dream state, you were born, you go to school, you get older, time passes, you get married, you have a job, you grow older, you're eighty-five years old and you start declining. This is the dream that you're having. Now, if I came into your dream state and I told you, "You're dreaming. You're not really eighty-five years old and you were never born and none of this has ever happened." You would throw rocks at me. And you'd say, "What are you talking about? A century has nearly gone by. I remember when I was a little boy or a little girl and now I'm an old lady or an old man and I've got cancer. And you're telling me, this is a dream?" You wouldn't believe me. I tell you, do not concern yourself with your cancer or your state of eighty-five years old. Do not concern yourself with what's going on in your life. Rather, look within yourself for reality. Find reality and everything will take care of itself. Again you'll throw rocks at me. You don't want to hear anything like this. You say, "I've gone through all kinds of experiences in my life. And you're trying to tell me it's a dream? You can't fool me, this is not a dream, this is real!" Look I could even pinch you and you'll say, "Ow!" But then I say, "Remember, this is a dream pinch! It's all a dream." But you still won’t believe me. Then when I leave, you awaken. You awaken to this dream state. This state, what you call the waking state. And the dream is all gone, it's all finished, like it never existed. And you laugh. You were never born in the dream, you never went to school in the dream. You never got married in the dream. You never became eighty-five years old in the dream. You never had cancer in the dream. You've awakened to this state! Yet you say, "This state is longer." It's longer because you're having the dream, that's all! Remember when I was in your dream, when you were eighty-five years old? To you it was a long dream. You went through many experiences. You went through eighty-five years of experiences and they all seemed very valid to you. Yet it happened in a split second. It happened in a split second, all the years, the experi-ences, the cancer. It happened in a split second and you awake, you awaken to this state. This state is the same thing. This is also a dream state. Not any different than the dream state that you dream at night. Same thing! It's only another dream. And you will only understand this when you awaken! A person is no longer in the dream state, no longer in the waking state, they're in a state of sahaja samadhi between the waking and dream state. There is really no state for a person like that. But to the ajnani, he believes that a Sage is in the waking state like they are. How do you get out of this, the dream business? How do you transcend those both states? Simply by going beyond them, you go beyond the dream state by realizing that when you react to conditions, to person, place or thing, you are perpetuating the dream. You can tell where you are by the way you react to life. If you believe that your body's getting older, that you're a person, that you have problems, you react to life's conditionings, then you're caught up in the dream, just like any dream at night. All kinds of conditions befall you and you believe it's real and you react to them. As long as you react to them you will never get out of it. You feel angry, you feel fear, you believe something is wrong some place. Then you can never get out of the dream. In other words, you'll go from one dream to the next. This is called reincarnation. It's one dream after the other dream. It never ends. You take on body after body after body, always dreaming, always reacting, always believing something is wrong, something is right, something is good, something is bad. And again, as long as you believe this, you'll never get out of it. So the way to get out of it completely is to realize that there is an observer who observes both states. The observer observes both states, the dream state and the so called, waking state. Now remember this is for the ajnani. For the Sage nothing like this exists. For the ajnani, you have to think to yourself, "Who is the observer? Who created this?" in other words, "Who made all this up? Who created the so called dream state and the waking state?" And if you think real carefully, it's our old friend Ishvara, the god of karma. Ishvara has been playing with his leela again. You tell Ishvara to stop playing with his leela and he won't listen. He's feeling these states. Ishvara, for some of you who don't know who he is, he's a personal god that you have created out of your mind. When you believe that you are a body, then you created god in your own image, and we call this god, Ishvara, the god of karma. It is he who dictates all these things, what's going to happen, what karma you're going through, how many lives you're going to live. Now, here's the secret, if you get rid of Ishvara, it'll be finished. You'll be free!You've got to kill Ishvara. Ishvara has to be removed, totally and completely then you'll be totally and completely free! How do you kill Ishvara? By laughing in his face "Who are you? Where do you come from? You can't frighten me any longer. I no longer accept you. You're part of my mind, my imagination. You're part of my false imagination! You do not exist!"Now, I bet some of you here are afraid to do something like this because you think you are insulting god. What kind of god are you insulting? A god that you made up your-self! You created this god. Where else would he come from? Is there a god up in the sky looking down at you throwing lightening bolts, saying, "You're a good boy, you're a bad girl! I'm going to punish you. I'm going to reward you." Do you know some of you really believe this? Yes, while I'm talking to you, some of you really accept this. And you're afraid to get rid of this God. But can't you see this very god is keeping you in bondage! It's this very god that makes you take on new bodies, makes you believe that you're a person, with problems. It is this very god that makes you worry about your body or about your finances, concern yourself with the world situation. And this god laughs while you cry! You're concerned about this. You're concerned about that. You're concerned about everything. Only when the god is removed will you become free It's up to you to remove this god. You've got to do it, nobody can do it but you. This is not blasphemy. Blasphemy is when you're believ-ing that the Self that can hurt you. When you believe in problems, when you believe some-thing is wrong, that's blasphemy!But it is virtually impossible for anything to be wrong for this whole universe the whole world is consciousness. The whole universe is consciousness. It has absolutely noth-ing to do with gods or goddesses, or karma or reincarnation or dreams. These things are part of human thinking. When you realize you're no longer human, they disappear. You must become inhuman. It is up to you to do this.You have to ask yourself the right questions. Many of you are afraid to question yourself. You're afraid that god is watching you and you'll be punished. Yet, some of you actually believe this. But I say to you from direct experience, there's no god at all any-where in the universe that can punish you or wants to punish you or has tried to punish you. If there's a god that exists, he's too busy screwing up the world to think of you! (laughter) What big egos some of us have, we think god is looking at us, judging us. We're so important, we're being judged, by an anthropomorphic God some place up in the sky. We're so important, aren't we? That this mighty god is punishing us personally for being bad little boys and girls. Get rid of all this, once and for all! Remove it from your mind! Empty your mind totally of this kind of thinking.There is only pure awareness, absolute reality and that is you right now! Right this moment! Don't think about it, just be it! Do not attempt to analyze what I'm saying or try to figure it out in any way, just be it! What I'm talking about you can only be. You can't think about it. When you begin to think about it, the truth about the matter disappears. Then you get caught in the body, in a thinking body. Yet, there's no time or space for any thoughts to exist. For time and space themselves do not exist. So where can you think? There's no place for you to think. For the thoughts have to move. And there is no room for thoughts. But what I'm telling you is that you're absolutely free right now. Absolutely liberated right this minute. You are. You are the entire universe right now. You who was never born, can never die. You are the one, right now! This very moment! Feel it! There is nothing else. How wonderful it is to be totally free. Free of praying to gods for your salvation. Free of thinking of a body that needs care or you have lack or limitation some place in your life. Be free of this kind of thinking. I know some of you are saying, "Well, it's okay for him to say that. But the doctor told me I got cancer. I got AIDS. And I have no funds in the bank. My wife or husband left me." Who are you talking about? You're not talking about the real Self, that you are! You're talking about somebody who doesn't exist! You're speaking of a dream person! That's here today and gone tomorrow! You're not speaking of the Self. Wake up! Try to understand what I'm saying to you. You are the god! You are the Brahman. You are the Self. Stop thinking of yourself as a mortal being, once and for all. Stop it! Cut it out! Behave yourself! Wake Up! Know who you are. Change your mind. Lift it up from this nonsensical thinking, and allow the mind to think in the heart. The heart will open up as a rose does with its calyx to the sun. And you will begin to laugh in joy and ecstasy, that you are the one. The one that is beyond time and space The one that is beyond reality, beyond causation. You are that one. Awaken to it, now. Wake up! Don't just sit there like a lump of manure, wake up! Who do you think you are? You are the god, remember this always. The only god that exists! There is no other god but you. Robert Adams, T235: Get Out Of The Dream Business

Everything you just said, was said within Oneness. And now everything I'm going to say will happen within Oneness...within YOU...because YOU are it...there is not TWO its only YOU!!❤ There is only Oneness... Nothing happens outside of Oneness.. You are the very Oneness in which you are trying to create a duality out of... you can pull out A ying yang symbol pretzels, popcorn, candy this or that light, dark, polar opposites, anything you desire and it's STILL all happening within Oneness...within THIS.... Even if you tried to create Duality which YOU are...it would still just be happening within Oneness. Absolute Infinity doesn't stand up in the court of enlightenment. There are no purple dragons, flying unicorns and pink fairies floating around somewhere.... that's an illusion in your mind, a figment of your imagination just like Duality. There NEVER was ten thousand waves in the ocean it was only the ocean the whole time...you were just bamboozled.. Back to the drawing board youngster as you get older you will be more stuck in your Illusions so you might as well snap out of the Matrix NOW... You're an intelligent guy but don't get smart with me my deep samadhi experience will stomp your absolute Infinity into the ground every time... A samadhi beats an orgasm every time unknown but it was actually me.... I am the spiral wizard of wizardry...get it.. The yin-yang symbol is meant for the dream. Non-duality is meant for the awakened. If you want to stumble around in the dream go ahead I'm just here waking people up.. I love you as well this is out of love but you need to wake up BUD ❤

Lose a front tooth and immediately experience being marginalized by the majority of people you encounter. I also saw this in myself, as the one who judged others for such things. For appearances. I saw some of my automatic judgements. Afterward I was a little bit freer. It's ok to have preferences. It doesn't matter. Cuture endorses acquired Conscience which changes from Culture to Culture. Inner quiet and peace is experienced with Awakened Conscience. Which is universal. It's in the language of the smile. Nobody seems to really want this.

Matt think about who is trying to become awakened... The character otherwise known as the false self cannot awaken. It doesn't have the ability to awaken because this character is a fictional entity created by the ego construct. Yes there is a real human body/mind but there is NOT a character named Matt which you are trying to awaken. Do you see the problem? You are trying to awaken an illusory sense of self. The person you described as inadequate and plagued by addictions and emotions is an illusion. Your true self is what does not change its what is always here it's the pure conscious awareness that you need to notice and realize as your true self. Here is a video called the illusion of "I" and I would also like you to watch the movie: Samadhi (Maya the illusion of self) on YouTube okay...... trust me on this one...❤ Good luck Oneness!! Become aware ? ❤

@VeganAwake funny how much attention we give to something that does not exist. I'd never even know there's such a thing as an ego if someone did not tell me in one of those spiritual videos. Perhaps awakened folks should spend less time on youtube and do more actual exploration.

@NormanN Because it has transformed my existential experience, like @Angelite says even being in the presence of Anada for 45 mins helped so much as she is an awakened being. You also get to ask questions related yo YOUR process, not some random guy at a retreats process, that's the biggest difference for me, your sticking points will be so different to mine etc, the presence helps but it's not the full picture ofc. And they don't control you're awakening you do, you finish when YOU say you do, you will know in your own direct experience when the seeking is over, and whether you have awakened and are living in non duality. Are they perfect? Of course not. Like you said they merely support the awakening. All I can say is try RASA for yourself I was skeptical and held off for 4 months or so before pulling the plug, and boy am I glad I did, life is very different now than it was in February.

Ok i'll give you a normal answer. To sit face to face with a sage for a moment, is better than other practices (done for a very long time). They can do anything, speaking, just sitting, teaching, or simply you visiting them for a short while. It doesn't really matter. The chance is, if you've come across a sage, it will likely be that you'll get slightly awakened. Just being in the same space will do.

Yes 100%, the whole teacher and the flower model really doesn't work that well imo, most teachers awakened spontaneously or through working closely with a teacher- Rupert Spira, Francis Lucille etc etc. I personally work with a teacher 1-1 ad have done since February and it has spearheaded my growth to depths I never believed possible, and without it honestly I think it still be stuck as a hardcore seeker. Think of it like this in Sporting terms, lts say for Football (Soccer wrong word but hey) if you have a coach try and teach the whole team each individual is going to get much less out of it, they'll of course get some value, however if the coach works 1-1 with specific players they can work on their individual weak spots and strengths. It's no different spiritually, even with Leo I feel for him he has 1000s of seekers here each with their own questions and problems, one man can only do so much, if he was to work 1-1 regularly with say 10 students at a time, he'd actually have much greater chance of these people awakening, the same with Rupert, Francis etc. Ramaji and Ananda Devi do just that and honestly they've helped to awaken so many people in a short period of time using 1-1 teaching and RASA, without it I wouldn't have awakened, maybe some experiences from Psyches, but nothing compared to what my existential experience is now!

Non-Duality when embodied will show you and you will live as the Self, as the Absolute and know yourself and everything to be that,it's pretty fucking awesome. Unless you wanna go live in a cave and meditate forever, you still have the Human realm to live through, after all, you're still a Human with a body and a mind until the day you die, so personally I also want the best human experience, it's as simple as that really. To me, there's no point being awakened if I'm living on the streets begging for food, extreme I know.

Sadhguru said in this video that if we have but a drop of the intelligence of the body in our lives, health isn't even an issue. You will live magically, he said. I think Sadhguru means that we already have fourth density intelligence inside the body waiting to become awakened.

@LfcCharlie4 I sense that you're missing my whole point and that you are an instructor of sorts explains much. Thank you none the less... I have no interest in psychics. Nor do I have a desire for money collectors. After I read "Awakened Empath" and "Old Souls" by Luna, Lonerwolf.com and realized that there are many out there who seemingly share information under the guise of being Enlightened in order to promote a business, though they don't necessarily start out this way, I became detoured. Maybe a person truly wants to help but then greed sneaks in and all is lost, literally. I can have one Spiritual Awakening and then run with and never have another though you couldn't tell me anything because ego has the ability to deceive.

@moon777light Everybody can become awakened if they choose to. We are all enlightened we are just not aware of it. Let go of doubts and be. Everything is the way they are due to infinite love, enlightened or not. Much love.

what you did was just referring to a dead meat not an awakened person. awakened person doesn't always in all cases take the middle point, he or she can take one side to defeat the other. there's a way big difference between realizing that all problems are imaginary versus taking approach to solve the problem. if you're damn enlightened and you see that blood gushing out of your vein, if you don't care to put a bandage on it, it's your own problem, not non-duality's

You can create many justifications or reasons for continuing to do what you are doing. Just remember the cost and the price. Consider this hypothetical - if enough people awakened and didn't need any of this, you + many others would be out of business. Truth is prior to life purpose. Yes certainly you can't give universal advice to everybody, hence why I suggested to create sub-categories of the "enlightenment/meditation" section.

@Matt23 Yeah no offence mate, to me that's like teaching someone to cook without ever cooking yourself, but you've read cookbooks. I don't mean to shoot you down and by all means, introduce people to this, but I don't think you should really begin teaching until you're at least enlightened yourself, also, 2 years is a long time to be at this with little results in my opinion. Psychedelics could give you insights but in my opinion, there's much more 'efficient' ways to help you grow spiritually and actually permanently embody awakenings. I've worked 1-1 with a teacher since February and my growth has been amazing, the Spiritual Transmissions have been amazing. Good luck on your journey, but please don't teach until you are actually awakened yourself.

When you awaken you're free to be who you truly are and do what you want so of course, however once people open the heart fully they are HIGHLY unlilely to engage in things that cause harm to other people etc, so won't round cheating or sexually assaulting people etc. Bentinho is certainly awakened, I wouldn't say he is fully awakened or finished though. Also, I'd recommend doing some research on these kind of guys: https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/wjmxvm/the-controversial-guru-who-wants-to-upgrade-civilization-bentinho-massaro-video

Keep in mind that the Absolute is distinct from the structures of the mind/brain/self. Which means it's possible to awaken but still have addictions. Because addictions are baked into the structure of the mind/brain/self. Awakening itself does not necessarily change the mind/self. Which is why an awakened person can still smoke cigs, have a porn addiction, etc. You can think of it this way: awakening disidentifies you from your mind. But the mind still continues to fire according to its lifetime of karma. If you spent a lifetime watching porn, your mind has been programmed with that habit, and awakening will not automatically remove all that. You will have to retrain your mind. This is why many awakened people are still flawed and still have bad habits and cravings. The mistaken assumption is that awakening will perfect the mind. This is simply untrue in practice. What perfects the mind is deliberate training, which many people neglect to do, especially after an awakening or two. Perfecting the mind is harder than awakening. In practice you could get many awakened people hooked on heroin. Because in truth they ain't that awake.

What are examples or ways in which western science can be used to increase consciousness? How can western science actually help you awaken? Honestly, the more I delve into western science, the more I see it as a survival mechanism at heart - rather than something that increases consciousness. Of course science can be used to explain metaphysical phenomena like the entire universe is one big brain, but that only makes sense to people who are already awakened, defeating the purpose. The scientific method just seems to be a process of gas lighting what's actually going on, having profound insights, but then distorting them by projecting a false sense of logic and patterns for the sake of upholding the scientific method itself, rather than just being happy with actuality. I find the liberal arts - like post modernism to be a more effective academic stream for understanding and increasing consciousness then any of the science fields.

Well first off, I don't think enlightenment is something that is definitive that can be delineated. People often think there's some kind of 'finish line'. I don't think that's true. I think it's more of a spectrum than a light switch. I think awakening is an ongoing and possibly even neverending process. I don't think the expansion of consciousness will reach a final point on the earthly plane, at the very least. So I don't think there's even a duality of 'being enlightened' as opposed to 'not being enlightened'. If you think you or someone else is enlightened, how do you know this person can't even get more enlightened? So that's the first thing. Secondly, even if there was such a thing as definitive enlightenment, then the hallmark of someone who has reached it is the person for whom asking the question whether he or she is enlightened would be absolutely meaningless. Not that it can't be questioned, but it's just meaningless. Someone who has reached really high levels of consciousness has gone past the paradigm of introspection and reflection; Gone past the paradigm of thinking altogether, really. Not that the person can't think, but the need for existential contemplation has disappeared. The need has disappeared because the faculty of introspective thinking has been exhausted and thereby deflated. Post-yellow stages in Spiral Dynamics are not attached and usually not even interested in thinking anymore. Not to mention, the awakened person sees that the whole game of enlightenment is just a silly and possibly even stupid notion anyway. I'm not talking about the hardcore inner work, but I'm talking about the constant evaluation, judgement and comparison that goes like: "How close am I to enlightenment? Am I enlightened? Is that person enlightened? Will this or that make me enlightened? How do I recognize someone to be enlightened? Is this person more enlightened than that person?". All these questions seem just utterly meaningless and even silly to an ACTUAL enlightened person, were there to be such a thing as an 'enlightened person' to begin with, which I don't think there is as part of a duality of 'enlightened vs non-enlightened' In fact, I would encourage people here to just do the goddamn inner work and drop the whole enlightenment game they're playing with themselves. I see it here way too much. The enlightenment-game is just another game that the ego-mind likes to play. The game that gets played in the mind about the topic of enlightenment is way different than doing the actual inner work that will facilitate the growth of your consciousness. The game that the mind likes to play of evaluation, comparison and judgement is simply just a sheer wastage of energy and time.

@Matt23 firstly, are you enlightened before teaching? One of the biggest worries for me in the Non-Dual community is the blind leading the blind. Basically people who aren’t even awakened/ fully awakened teaching people which brings with it a lot of risks. also, a lot of teachers tend to then lose focus on their own development and “crystallise” where they’re at often, so that’s something to consider. Most people will need some sort of theoretical Non-Dual understanding etc Things that helped me most- 1) Working 1-1 with a “Fully” awakened teacher (I class this as LOC 1000) 2) Spiritual Transmissions/ RASA 3) Enneagram work to learn my biggest pitfalls in awakening 4) Foundational Meditation/ Self-Inquiry work of course 5) Guided presence meditations, hard to explain mind of like walking through your true nature as presence There’s a lot more that helps on the path, but this has helped the most in my own awakening process. Good luck!

Ultimately I don't know enough enlightened heroin addicts to give a reliable answer but thought I'd play with the question a bit. If the addict declined the heroin, would it prove that they weren't addicted in the first place? Similarly, if the enlightened person took it, would it prove that they weren't enlightened in the first place? Maybe it depends on our definitions. If we define addiction as "inability to avoid something" and enlightenment as "awakened but might still have some addictions", then maybe we get one answer. If we define addiction as "tendency not to avoid something but might still be able to avoid it if lucky/determined etc." and enlightenment as "grasps the true self to the extent that extreme desire and physical needs are largely mastered" then maybe we get another answer. A key part seems to be "in the room" as I assume most people who successfully cease heroin consumption aren't locked in a room with it. I thought it was a nice question by the way. I hope the mods don't get a hold of it and lock it because it's not directly relevant to the average person's immediate personal development. Half the fun of learning is getting to ponder the unusual and quirky things that most people don't normally consider or pay attention to. This is partly why I like Actualized.org.

Your understanding of awakening is limited. Depending on how deeply craving is extinguished, an awakened person can not only say no to heroin but also deal with heroin withdrawal symptoms. I think people don't understand what the elimination of craving actually is. Also, remember that heroin addiction is overcome by people who have NEVER meditated. Just over time, with a lot of resistance, ordinary people do give up this substance. So we are not talking about a level of addiction so high that no ordinary person even has a chance of giving up. All 'addictive' substances (like heroin) has been overcome by ordinary people at some point in their lives. A deeply awakened person can give up any substance (including heroin) without suffering (or if unskilled with minimum suffering). This doesn't mean they wouldn't experience pain. They would. But they would momentarily ease into the experience of pain knowing that sensate reality is impermanent, occurring to no-self, and resistance to this sensation resulting in craving and suffering. If you couldn't deal with extreme cases like heroin addiction, then why even pursue awakening? The end of suffering is not a simple statement. It is a radical statement. A skilled meditator would also experience as much equanimity as possible with meditative joy as well depending on the severity of the pain. And again, depending on your skills, you can experience joy and happiness in spite of great physical and emotional pain. If I've done this with low levels of pain, then someone who is actually awake can do this with great pain. They would also have vastly improved skills in stable attention, mindful awareness, sensory clarity and equanimity than I do. Therefore, skillful practice even in heroin addiction (which has one of the most painful drug withdrawal symptoms out of all drugs) is possible for a deeply awake person.

It’s possible to become liberated anywhere. Some attain it through isolated circumstances while others attain it through interaction with others. From the Absolute “perspective”, circumstance is more of a correlation rather than a causation. This is why there’s no such thing as one objectively right way to become awakened.

@Red-White-Light By the sounds of it you haven't actually shattered your materialist paradigm. You may have had glimpses but to want to go back to duality as you describe, then somewhere along the way you have got confused. How did you shatter it, what practices did you do and/or are doing? You can't undo what you have seen. Perhaps you are oscillating between being awakened and being a human within the materialist paradigm. Keep going, dont give up, you'll see the light soon. ?