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Just had this thought at 4 am in the morning. Through all the pain and desperation I have felt in my life there were 3 possible paths I could have taken. Obviously I now say that from a birds view having left my most of my troubles behind. 1. Commit Suicide 2. Become a Monster 3. Become Conscious. I put becoming conscious on position 3 on purpose. Because that’s, funny enough, what I have been doing unconsciously for the last 5 years without ever realising or articulating it like that. 12 years of my life was spent emotionally void and suicidal. But now I feel on top of the world. Out of anyone I am the last person who would have expected that outcome. Man. This life will take me places.

I wish I felt otherwise though it is quite crippling - I'll be stuck dating older women like 24 above which aren't all that attractive imo - The younger the better; been that way throughout histroy; Ancient babylon the riches men bought the first woman on sale as the most beautiful, and then the poorest gets the ugglies - Richer you are the more likely your marriage will last - Throughout histry the rich and wealthy were priveledged to women and marriage. I think the gorvenment should offer services for assisted suicide if this crippling anxiety continues manifesting in the infinite Quantum field deeper levels of unwanted - I mean what if with this depression I kill myself and then I return as someone ugly - Like death is a LOA launchpad and your energy will manifest into something near to the energy you died at - Or as divine source energy do we get to come back as whatever we please; somewhat like Alan Watt's teachings, Abraham Hicks, David R Hawkins, Teal Swan ... probably a few other great teachers to list ... Leo, too ... - Because the latter I mean my mind can only handle so much and I'm okay giving in the flag and quitting this unnecessary pressure to survive with an insatiable tormenting immense lonliness sexual desire for nothing.@Jannes Dude - I am 27 what is my dating range? I want 19 years olds dude who are virgins bro - That is what I want - 24 years above they should be married at that stage imo - I missed teen romance and now I'm probably creepy if to approach 19 year olds? Unless I was rich and clubbing - But idk - The moment it starts to get creepy and I have to date 30 year olds dude I am going to go fucking mad - I will go fucking crazy - Fuck that - Hence I ask Leo if suicde has what preprecussions??? I want an answer - Because I will go fucking mad - I will not fucking handle it or go fucking zen about or fucking mindful about I can not tell my sex energy to fucking stop - You are a fucking dude you know I am not making this up - You can agree with me about this on some level??

I felt suicidal before, but really counsciously contemplated suicide only once. When i was 17/18 my suffering was unbearable and i tought why not just end it ? My conclusion was purely pragmatic: Even if it is going to be only suffering my whole life, im going to live only this one time and then it is going to be over... so i should just let it happen and see the end of it. My next tought was i'll be breathing my whole life so im just going to focus on that and let everything else go.

Destiny is unhinged. This isn't something new or controversial. He moves like a sociopath. There is something fundamentally wrong with how he can be so unkind, cruel, and devoid of sympathy or feelings towards others. He has laughed about the suicide of his best (?) friend before. Found the whole thing funny. Didn't care to persuade his friend away from it. To him, it was whatever. That guy is not normal in the head.

I don't know if this is against forum guidelines, but I need help. I can't hang myself and need a good idea for how to die. Please help. I should and I simply need to. My life cannot work anymore. I lost everything and am not in circumstances that allow me to be mentally healthy. All ways for how to do that are gone.

Bellow I explain a bit more above, the dysmorphia is that murder is wrong when you are fundamentally born to murder. Let’s use sex as an example if someone is demonizing sex when their hormones and biology are fighting them and saying the opposite they are completely out of alignment with reality, with their biology, with life, and because they’re out of alignment they cannot experience any kind of harmony, they have resistance to reality which is a lack of love. If you’re fighting everything because of some ideology because of some morality because of some anything then you’re resisting reality itself and functioning in the dysmorphic state. it’s the same reason depression and suicide is a different dysmorphic state with the body because the body does not want to die and your body and mind are doing everything to stop you from dying yet you’re aligned with suicide which is disfunction and a type of body dysmorphia. suicide is body dysmorphia because it’s resisting the body, which is designed and has its own specific type of intelligence but the bodies intelligence is not in alignment with the persons identity/Intelligence, so that’s dysmorphic. If at higher stages of consciousness you view suicide as a natural process of death then that would be a healthy and aligned body identity. Because death is natural and now your identity accepted it. Identity is now in harmony with reality. You’re not a floating mind in a vacuum, identity has to align itself in everyway to reality or else you have disfunction.

I want to provide some more value to this community before I inevitably leave. I was thinking about what threads I could create. What do I say that others would get value from? So pointless. The harder I try, the less I succeed. I figured the best contribution I can make is simply share my experience. Someone who relates should find my words valuable. I don't need to make threads explaining my techniques, insights or any of that shit. Who gives a fuck? People relate to stories, not words of convincing. I am in unprecedented territory. After my suicide "attempt" (nothing would happen anyway, it was failed from the start, I was just being dramatic) I repressed the memory. But I knew I had to tell my closest one since otherwise I was emotionally blocked from her. And so after 2 weeks I told my girlfriend. ... A lot of crying. Anger. No faith. The most humiliating day of my life. I seriously didn't know how to continue living. I felt like I destroyed everything. But we're getting through it. I have the greatest girlfriend in the world. My literal hot witch girlfriend. My dream come true. I love her so much. I'm becoming a real man with her by my side. Anyways we're moving out together in less than a month. I got us an awesome fucking flat for rent in a beautiful location. I'm really happy about that. So much is happening. Almost too much. But right now I feel quite well. Today I watched my live awakening video that I posted to the forum in May last year. Gosh, this was only a year ago...? I was so different. That's not me on that video. I wonder what would happen if I took LSD now. I don't know why... I run away.

The primary reason why you are suffering is most likely not because of the lack of female companionship, but simply because you perceive yourself as having failed to meet societal standards. You view yourself as a failure, as unworthy, as unlovable. That is the fundamental issue. If you were stranded on an island, with the rest of the world destroyed in nuclear fallout, and all you had was a group of men to keep you company, you might experience less psychological torment than you are right now, because whether or not you have a woman would no longer matter in whether or not you perceive yourself as a failure. You could adapt and live out the life the best you could on an island like this. Not having a woman would be frustrating, but if it was a universally shared experience, it would not cause you the same psychological anguish as it relates to your self-identity, what you consider to be the worth you have as a human being. What you must realize is that you have fallen prey to a perverse game. You have bound your self-love to the contemporary societal values and norms. In other words, you have bound yourself to a society that has not yet transcended the dark-ages, a depraved, sick, undeveloped and blind society. This society will not give you unconditional love, because everyone is starving and scrambling for every bit of love they can get. People are so lacking that nobody can freely share it, lest they would carry the burden of everyone else. In such a scenario, the solution is not to attempt to find your piece of love, to play the game as everyone else is playing it, destined to succeed for some and fail for others. The solution is to become a beacon of love yourself. To become the one who gives love, not who takes it. Suicide is silly in this case, because all of this is in your head. And you are far from the only one, there are countless lost souls who are seeping through the gaping cracks in society. You could become someone who can find joy in eleviating their suffering, and to bring true love to them. To not give them love, but to teach them how to become beacons themselves. Next time you see an overweight, ugly woman, think of how much she must suffer, and how much her condition is because the society we live in today. Think about how different her life could be, including her health, if our societal had a more sophisticated relationship between self-love and societal norms. You have been been raised on ignorance, and so has she.

If suicidal is a solution then it may end this inner torment - nor do I want to go to therapy - Like my inner world is a raging bull sometimes in a labrynth of complex conceptializing idk if thanks to Acid for example - But if suicide ends this horror film, that might be a solution, right? Seriously, I want an answer to this, and Leo you're the most enlightened intellectual I can reach out to for an answer, as youtube is limited, or even your subsribers too, thanks. Like why don't I just end it, this rage sometimes could do it if with the right means Like once a week I call suicide hotline almost regularly to get it off my chest otherwise I could maybe go mad dude

@Rafael Thundercat They say some 20-30% or even more of the population is dealing with Mental Health issues, I was thinking about this awhile ago, in Canada there are about 40million ppl, if 25% of the population has mental health problems, that's 10mil ppl, there are not near that # of therapist or counsellors to help, so its gone out of control imo, I wish it wasn't this way... I think we have to offer ppl programs that are not about Enlightenment, Absolute and such grand things, but just basic stuff, how to be Healthy, How to be Happy, How to Think Right, Eat Right, Breath Right, Sit Right, stuff like this should be taught in schools from day 1, the other stuff like math and geography means nothing if Your mental health is rotten, so there are ways to deal with it for the next generations, this gen will have to suffer thru it and deal with the consequences of it Unfortunately! @An young being Yes Agreed, that is why for me I keep telling these Absolutist, Non Dualist types and they know who they are, that there are levels and progressions to everything, Living and Promoting the Absolute or Solipsism as the only way or thing existing is rubbish, tell that too the Parents that just lost their child to Cancer, the Solipsist will say its all Imagination and will fluff it off and say bla bla bla, but its a reality for those Parents, so we have to Start from where we are At, not where the End Goal/Destination is, this is Compassion and Realization of what is the Reality, as it encompasses it all, not just one aspect of it... My Nephew died by Suicide in 2006. it devastated our Family, he was only 27, had tons of friends and family and potential, but mental health was very poor, addiction too, it runs in the family, but its a Cultural problem too, we don't teach our kids how to live and just Be Fulfilled naturally, it was Sad...

How I want to approach this topic is sort of like how El Salvador solved their gang crime issue. They did massive sweep putting gangs in jail. However, unfortunately some people who may not have been in gangs were jailed too. People judge El Salvador for this. However, life is harsh and when it comes to saving a country sacrifices also results for the greater good of everyone. My point is, I am aware I can’t serve everyone. But, I can with my growing understanding help many. When I provide some of the most powerful practices, concepts and ideas for living a joyful life for most people some people won’t be able to take the advice. That doesn’t mean I will just cower down and be like “oh someone disagrees with me” well, maybe they have some truth but I went and studied this for a decade and I will continue to. I can’t help everyone but my Qigong is helping people. Recently my Qigong video was shared on the suicide anonymous UK Website. https://www.suicideanonymous.co.uk/heal-your-body/ My Qigong video is at the bottom. Try it out and see how Qigong can be a useful tool in your life.

Letting go means accepting yourself as God. Suicide and all.

I should have some good input on this issue. I have been struggling with suicidal thoughts for about 13 years. I have been diagnosed with a combination of depression, anxiety, ptsd, autism, and ocd. There were many factors fueling my suicidal thoughts and actualized.org has helped me address some of these problems. First of all, I have been reading the book list. I became well educated on emotional mastery and used trauma release exercises like forgiveness to help with suicidal thoughts. I combined this with self reflection with a journal and I tried therapy with mixed results. I tried anti depressants with disastrous consequences. I would say that the emotional mastery I learned from this site has helped to ease my suffering. Therefore Leo's teachings can prevent suicide. Secondly, existential problems were causing me some anxiety. I had been thinking deeply about life since I was a child, and it was obvious that I put more thought into this than normal people. My family followed Christianity, but I was skeptical of religion. I used a lot of self reflection and the teachings from many spiritual books to help answer some existential questions. I found some good answers in surprising places like success and productivity books recommended on the book list. I struggled with nihilism especially for a long time, but this site helped me to find meaning and purpose. Therefore, Leo's teachings prevent suicide. Currently I am seeking a new type of therapy. My biggest weakness seems to be understanding relationships and social isolation. I had a very chaotic upbringing riddled with betrayal and illegal activity. It makes it hard to trust those closest to me. On top of that I have a hard time relating to people due to autism and my family is frustrated with me because of my autism. Misunderstanding social situations gets me into trouble on several occasions. Currently, actualized hasn't helped me with this particular issue, but maybe there will be relationship videos on the future. Sometimes my damaged family relationship triggers suicidal thoughts. My mind used to be very chaotic. Now my mind is much quieter than it used to be. Maybe there is a lot more I could say, but I don't know what else. @Leo Gura Thank you for your valuable work.

I am a Bachelor's graduate, studied psychology. Now i am struggling with my relationships with my family. They are total opposite from my philosophy and lifestyle. I leave my family and my hometown and now i am staying in Dubai. But here now i found that there is not a great scope of medical field especially psychology. Now i am struggling also feeling depressed. Cause i don't wanna go back to that home. Also if anybody is here from dubai. Contact me please to help me finding a job. My phone no: +917558159692 Also i spend a big amount on my visit to here. Now i am trapped here. I also applied for some odd jobs but not get even one response. I don't know what to do now?

One last dance Here at the end of the Empire Makes me cry Watching the moon on the ocean Well California here is the beat It's not half bad, but Spend half your life being sad, whoa Don't be scared, uh-uh Just chronically impaired, uh-uh Just take my hand, uh-uh Standing at the end of the American Empire One last song Here at the end of the movie They seemed so sure At least that's the way I remember the war What New York used to be It's not half bad, no Spend half your life being sad, whoa Don't you eat, uh-uh Half your life fast asleep, uh-uh Feeling uninspired, uh-uh Standing at the end of the American Empire And we know that it's time to go Heard the news on the radio One last round before we go Through the pain and the searing glow And the oxygen is getting low Sing a song that we used to know One last round before we go One last round before we go So we slide Didn't use to get high Didn't use to drink any Didn't use to think I Could ever dream about losing you Didn't use to get low This time of night And I didn't use to walk home In the morning light without you Without you Didn't use to get high Didn't use to drink didn't use to think I Could ever dream about losing you You, but I do It's you and I, it's do or die Suicide mission, baby by my side We got one life, and half of it's gone You know I can't sleep with the television on Didn't use to get high With you by my side Leave the light on

The problem is that human dynamics are very powerful, have enormous evolutionary inertia, and many triggers that force compulsive action. would you be happy sitting in misery under that bridge if the cause was that your wife denounced you for rape to steal all your assets and spend it on your best friend, and you just came out of serving an 8-year sentence in prison, during which your daughter commit suicide because of the abuse suffered by your friend? This, on a cosmic scale, is nothing, it is just another movement of life. Could you let it go and be in perfect harmony? In theory yes, but in practice it is extremely difficult. For example, if you were a crocodile and all your babies had been hunted to make ugly shoes for drug dealers, yes you could. You would be in the sun in total harmony and you would not care about all that even for a second. but being human is different

As far as amount of money goes, i said don't quote me on that, i read that article long time ago so i don't remember. But you missed the point. Its not about how much they spent, the idea is, the western mentality has a concept where you need to be successful and rich, and since many people cannot achieve such a state they fall into depression and In would assume thats where the suicide stems from. See people in Japan I believe are more into Shintoism, where material happiness is not the most important and hence with that mentality you be less likely to commit a suicide. And to your other point which is outside the scope of this topic, of yeah, those pharmaceutical companies are super corrupted, I can vouch form first hand experience, long time ago I actually did lobbying at Capitol Hill, and there, inline you see bunch of pharma companies doing extensive lobby. This is not a conspiracy but something that I can vouch as I epxrienced it myself.

I lately wrote the topic " I woke to the GOD. Death is the only whey to forget?' (sorry for my English, i'm not a native speaker) Thank you so much for all your help there, and also i want to send all the love to : @Kksd74628 @Godishere @Tim R They helped me on priv, so much!! i don't know what would i do, without them. Background: i've had spiritual experience for over 2-3 years, 16-17 trips, (lsd,shrooms,dmt). I mediate every day, lately for 2h a day. Also, I've had some retreats, on which it was 7-8h meditation daily. Almost every tip, till last, was pretty easy, some were challenging, but overall it was rather calm. I've experienced pure nothingness, no-dual states, i've seen my reflection in face on my girlfriend, i had God experience on DMT, when everything and everyone dispreaded, there was no time, only infinity etc. It was all ok. Dosage: 3 days ago, i took 250 uq LSD. I had one trip on 400uq, and it was nothing like that. Trip: After 1h i went to the God state. To the point, I exactly saw God everywhere. The floor was made of God, air was pure God, walls were God, which obviously is all me. I knew that, there was no going back, cause even if i go to the hospital, i can't meet anyone other than God, which is me. If I take some pills, it's going to be only self-deception to forget. I was deceiving my-self all the time, that i'm not God, it was obvious to me. it was all fine, i knew it was the case. But then i went to the bedroom, to talk with my girlfriend, she took LSD too. She was in GOD-state as well. She told me, that "I'm God" i don't why, but i felt like God, which is me, perfectly designed every aspect of my life, from birth, to this moment, and now, it's speaking to me, by the mouth of my girlfriend. I sat down on the bed, to look outside the window.... and all the people in the next building were gone. All the lights in their flats went down. I said "what? Am i really GOD?" there's no-one else? , she said, "yes". Then all the buildings collapsed into me. Weather started to change pretty rapid. Time stopped. Out of my pure imagination. I was 100% sure, that my-small-self died, and i'm out of the dream and i can't go back. There was only face of my girlfriend left. So i said, " really? i was God all my life? i'm dead now?" And then something happened, which shocked me to the core. That was the moment i felt like i want to go back, and forget. That was the moment i regret that i was even alive. The horror: i looked at my girlfriend eyes. It was all sparky with life as always, but suddenly it was gone. I was looking to the dead eyes, completely without a life. The woman i love, was not only dead, but she was empty and shallow. Dark. Void. She was like a withered flower. Like empty costume. It was the most horrifying things i saw in all my life. I was all alone, staring into the empty void of my girlfriend's eyes. Every fucking horror is a joke compare to that. With tears i asked " are you there?" and then i saw like life is going back to her. Her eyes went sparky again. But at that point, all the solipsism horror was unbearable. I wanted to kill myself. I wanted only cease to exist. I don't want to live with knowledge like that. I don't want to be alive with costume-people. It was pure-fuckig-madness-hell. My post on forum: At this moment I tried to write a post here, on the forum. But i knew, i couldn't get any advice from no one, because even actualize.com and Leo Gura is pure fucking imagination, only to cheat me into thinking, that there are others. I'm here, alone, trapped in this empty-shallow-world, to the infinity. It's Only me. I can't die, i can't escape. I wrote every music there is, i wrote every book, it was always only me!! fuck! i wanted to know infinity, and it turned out to be fucking back-mirror-hell. I wrote this post anyway, but i knew, i was talking only to my-self, and my infinite imagination. After the trip: Next 48h i couldn't sleep. I was crying, and shacking on the floor. I couldn't eat. I wanted only to die, and forget. Right now: People on this forum helped me with going through this. Today, after 6-7h of sleep, i'm back to the "old-self" and i don't see imagination and God everywhere. Thank God! Any idea what went wrong, and how do i integrate this? You guys said God-realization it's all about love, and i got fucking horror X1000 to the infinity. Thank you, for all your support. Personally, i think my "ego" still corrupts this forum solipsism, and i feel it through an illusion of separated self. But i don't know.

Exactly, Leo's teaching is to avoid suicide at all cost, all his advises can be accepted technically by anyone, you don't need money, hot girls or fame. All you need is to be with yourself. A long time ago I read an interesting article about Pfizer's Prozac, an anti depression pill. It was selling very well, except Japan. There, people have a mentality that life is like a river, you must have good days and bad days. So if you have few good days you need to expect bad days. And they could not sell anti depressants. So they made an evil plan, invested 5 billion (dont quote me on the number) and introduced American Culture there, movies, shows, reality TV and so on. Basically the American pop culture is to have high paying job, live in a mansion, fuck the most beautiful girls and drive Lamborghinis. An average person, at best can have one or even half of the items, so after I believe five years, the experiment worked and people started to fall into depression and the Prozac started to go fast. So if Leo was teaching that, I can understand people be suicidal, but its the other way around. And one more thing, I just started a small topic, but even on this thread, I feel like the idea of suicide is not new phenomena for some people here when it comes to personal level. Interesting how intimate this topic can be.

Reading your words, I conclude that the major flaws in your reasoning are that you are confusing pears with apples and operating from false data. When I think about Third World theocracies, the countries that come to mind are primarily Middle Eastern or Arabic nations. These nations aren't much competing with western nations when it comes to the labour market. They are mostly relying on natural ressources (oil), agriculture, tourism, and some manufacturing while noways western nations are more focused on the service industries. Western industries have been delocalized for production mostly in Asia, which except for a couple south eastern countries aren't even close to being theocracies. And actually, one of these country is China, and they've had until very recently the one child policy. So your assessment of the situation is straight out absurd. Western nations aren't very interested in people immigrating from Third World theocracies. Instead, they seek skilled intellectual labor. In the EU and the UK, most social dumping and industry delocalization have occurred by placing Western EU nations in economic competition with Eastern EU nations through free immigration policies within the EU and the free circulation of capital. This was one of the reasons why the UK ended up leaving the EU, as economically strong regions experienced a large influx of immigrants from all over the EU. Japan and South Korea are neither theocratic nor subject to a mass influx of immigration from these types of countries. In fact, they are quite protectionist nations with strong anti-immigration policies. Both countries have also struggled with declining birth rates due to an extremely competitive labor market, high inflation, and high living costs. They also have a quite high suicide rate.

@Rafael Thundercat I feel similarly. Spirituality both made suicide less taboo for me than before but also more pointless. Might as well enjoy the experience and learn to integrate the suffering. Been suicidal lately as life got hard and I'd say spirituality has helped more me than not. I would say specifically stuff like the power of now and the meditation habit that I got from you Leo have been very helpful.

Thanks for the math, so that was my real point, meaning people still commit suicide, its not that Actualized.org indirectly drives them (of course you state many times for those who are suicidal they should stop watching), or its somehow the context that makes them suicidal. I get the statistics, and its like saying there is a certain percentage of thievery in USA, so statistically those who watch, probability wise have to be at least few thieves, but that is just a probable cause and its not like when hearing awaking an individual is driven to steal stuff.

@lostingenosmaze Based on developmental factors, facts, statistics and logic are from more stage orange values. The function of logic and facts/statistics is to use numbers and numeric value and disassociate yourself from the situation. Numbers and data can be used to distance ourselves, make it more impersonal and less personal, especially when one event was so traumatic that depression, derealization, and disassociation is one way to cope with it. Having said all that, stats and data have their uses as well. Averaging the information and numbers, finding the aggregate of other variables, it's good to have data and statistics for an objective consensus reality. Statistics and data on suicide for example is good because it tells us, approximately, just how many suffer from suicide attempts, suicidation, and suicide deaths per years. Mr. Girl actually had a great video on this, about BLM, and his take on Neil De Gray Tyson on twitter bringing stats, and Mr. Girl saying that him doing that is him trying to distance himself from those events with a wall of logic and numbers, triggering apathy for yourself to protect yourself from the overload of empathy and emotions that'll wave and crush your mind. Yeah that was his communication style then.

If you think suicide is wrong, don't kill yourself.

But it is. It doesn't matter whether they are close or aren't. Suicide can happen either way. Just because someone is close to my teachings does not magically make them immune to suicide or mental illness. If you want to demonstrate that my teachings cause people to commit suicide then you have to show that people who follow my teachings commit suicide at higher rates than the general population. But even that would not be enough because you would also have to take into account that people drawn to psychological and spiritual work could have a higher rate of mental illness than the general population. Soonhei was not mentally well. His posts on this forum do not read like the posts on a well-adjusted mind. I know because I was deliberating about whether to ban him because the stuff he was posting was frequently weird and nonsensical and just felt off. I decided to be kind and let him stay because I didn't want him to feel bad. Exactly. Because you're looking to blame my teachings.