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The human experience of emotion and timing. . . Last month, a student entered my office. I immediately could tell she was in turmoil. A mixture of self-doubt and frustration. She had failed the first two exams, yet was putting in a lot of effort. She pulled out notebooks full of notes - color-coded with many colors. She was spending hours a day studying was still failing. She didn't know whether to drop the course, change her career or what. She oscillated back and forth between frustration and tears. We decided to have private tutoring, just the two of us. My role was to tailor-fit teaching to her optimal learning style. And to recognize any blocks she had. Her role was to show up every week on time and be fully present (she has ADD issues). We both played our roles. Last Friday was the next exam and . . . drumroll. . . she scored a 96%!!!! I have never seen a turn-around like that in my teaching career. This morning she came to my office to pick up her exam. I had been looking forward to giving it to her. She was super nervous. Whether or not she would drop this course came down to this exam. The stakes were high and I knew the result. I couldn't resist letting the suspense grow (since I already knew she aced the last exam), so I played it cool and took an extra minute or two to find the exam to let the anticipation build. . . As I handed her the exam, she reached out and I noticed her hand shaking as she reached for the exam. It was like she was radiating nervous energy. As I handed it to her, I smiled - a little bit at first then a big smile. She looked at her grade and there was a complete energy shift. . . there was a wave of relief and joy. I loved watching this. There was a moment in which there was no "her", there was no "exam", no "career", no "being good enough", no "what this means". There was a moment of nonduality in which simply joy existed. A few seconds past and then I blew it. . . I said "see what you are capable of?". Now, I meant this in the most empowering, loving, supportive way possible - yet it pulled her out of that beautiful nondual moment of pure joy into the story of "her". She popped back into the story line and the energy completely changed. I knew right away, that I spoke to soon. . . What I learned was to let that nondual magic just be. Flow with it. Let it swirl around the room like beautiful colors. Wait until her character reappears - and it would have. Eventually she would have popped back into character and said something like "Does this mean I could get a "B" in the course?" Or something like that. Then, I can play my role again and be supportive and empowering to her.

@NoSelfSelf You will. It will be from first quieting the mind. Say, 95% emptiness, the 5% of “remaining thought” would not be the same ‘thoughts’ you’ve been experiencing. The feel, the view, perspectives, openness, vulnerability...will be different. (Just pointing, words can’t really explain it). Once the mind has quieted, there is no narrative, no thought stories anymore. Then self inquire. When the emotions start spewing (and it can be very overwhelming) the most important thing is to know what to do: Write it out on paper. Write emotionally and honestly, be as vulnerable as you can. Understand, that from the entirely false view of reality, physical / separations / identities, etc...everything you have ever experienced included the body’s emotional reactions. Pretty much all of the emotional reactions were suppressed. They didn’t make perfect sense because of the ‘physical / separate perspective’, but the brain covered it. It’s like it protected the body, innocently. Not with an intention of harm, or falsity, but protection. When our understanding is false, thought protects the mind from the suffering of emotion, but making up thought stories to make the experiences make sense. When you write out the emotions on paper, you can see it. The mind can see what’s written. Consider, the mind has been ‘cut off’ from the emotions (90%) your entire life, and now you are looking at them, tapping into their power - now you desire to understand the sensations. So, it’ll take a while. Might have to self inquire and write it out 10 to 100 times. Each time it get less severe, and the occurrences get fewer and farther between. The main point of this, is “clearing”, so when you then return to self inquiry, you naturally, effortlessly go deeper and deeper over time. Through this process there is a highly counter intuitive thing to be aware of. It may seem like you’ve opened Pandora’s box, and basically screwed yourself (suffering). Don’t be foolish though, be vulnerable. Cry it out. Let Big Love wash you out. The mantra is TRUST. Trust yourself, trust God, trust the universe, trust your pet hamster, doesn’t matter, just make TRUST a mantra in those difficult days. Don’t try to ‘hold ground’ emotionally speaking. Don’t think “I’ll be fine”, don’t believe “I’ll be fine” - understand the overall process, and know “I will be fine”. You can let go, you’ll be totally fine. There is a study you could find online, revealing how decision transpires in the brain 6 seconds before the person experiences “making the decision”. If that doesn’t scream “It’s safe to trust & surrender!”, then what does? @Serotoninluv ?? What you’ll find, is the more you barf the emotions up onto the paper and see it / understand it...... At first, thought / thinking will go NUTS. Just keep returning to writing about it, and breathing from your stomach, and trusting. Over time, the thinking will begin to dramatically reduce. Eventually (depending on how much you personally need to barf out) you will reach this 95% emptied, and the mind is barely even there anymore. It is delightful - but make sure to be patient with your tasks, and with your relationships, and with yourself. It might seem like you’re screwed, because like, “how will I get on in life without my thinking?!” If / when that stage occurs - do the same thing - write emotionally about it. See it, read it, TRUST. This is a very key breakthrough at this particular point. If you surrender & trust, eventually your entire “mental experience” will shift / change entirely. Instead of linear monkey mind thinking, there is delicious, spacious, no mind. You will certainly then readily see how thinking used to be driven from suppressed emotions rooted in false perspectives of experiences. Thoughts, the experience of “thoughts” flips, and whereas before you experienced linear one at a time thoughts, now you don’t experience thoughts - only spacious quiet no mind ness, and insights. One after another. It is quite glorious. It comes and goes at first. Don’t desire it when it goes. Return to the practices, trust them. No more desiring “growth” at this point. Only surrendering to the moment, as it is. You can certainly still pursue whatever you want in your life, but surrender to the moment, the now - actually notice and enjoy it. It is highly likely that most your chakras will have unified by this point, and that your crown chakra / third eye has opened. (Enlightenment) Psychedelics can be very helpful at this stage. Theeeeennnnnnn......you will be in close proximation of Siddhi’s. You will likely have some minor Siddhi-like experiences, like knowing what someone is going to say before they say it knowing the next song on the radio before it plays, etc. Likely to be facinating, but also fleeting. As great as that will be, you will begin to sense you are not “fully enlightened”. It is not “em-body-ed”. The odds of you going deeper at this point are slim to none, as it is so wonderful and satisfying. Here, “going deeper”, is a “level” of Trust & Surrender that is unimaginable until you “get there”. If you do keep going with that ‘practices proccess’, you’re going to stir up that old thinking, the kind you just got rid of. Everyone and everything you love will surface in thought and appear to be a loss if you were to keep going. I would bet you anything you’ll stop there. Nothing wrong with that at all. But if you do keep going, you’re basically handing your heart over to God. And he’ll take it too. You might thinking I’m joking or putting it lightly. I’m not at all. Your finite perspectives will basically disappear as if you never even had them. The memories sort of go along with the perspective, in a way. Keep going at this point, and your heart chakra, third eye, and crown chakra blast open in a unification of Self. Then it becomes readily clear to you, that the power of Siddhi’s, is God’s Infinite Love. But you’ll actually experience it, unexplainable, miraculously - as your own. I know that makes some sense to you now, nonduality and all, but just wait. It will make ZERO sense later, at this point. No sense at all. Completely impossible. Yet, happening. -After having rambled on all that....meditation (attention held on relaxed stomach breathing initially on the cushion, eventually 24/7) is to clear the mind of “today’s” concerns, so you can do that overall self inquiry / write it out proccess. If you are hitting walls (have a lot tucked away emotionally) then yoga is very good to open the body / emotions, and learn to maintain focus and concentration while the emotion is released. Ultimately though, the keeper of the gateless gate - is the finite mind. -And get your diet as clean as possible along the way. Healthy eating is HUGE.

@noselfnofun I think that is a very good question and I think it depends on several variables - such as the nature of the substance itself, your physiology, energetics etc. Similar to what you describe, I would say psychedelics temporarily reveal “something” and that something can be difficult to integrate into daily life. I often have an afterglow in which I am fully connected and insights are so clear and obvious. Yet, like a dream it can wear off - I find reflecting and writing down the “dream” to be helpful. Yet there are also aspects of a trip that stick. It’s like once I see something, I can’t unsee it. For example, the first time I experienced “ego death” and “rebirth”. That fundamentally changed my awareness and it has never left me. I may forget time to time, but it’s always right back there. For me, each psychedelic often shows an aspect of truth, awareness, enlightenment, nonduality - whatever one wants to call it. There is often a “lesson” and some type of theme. I would say 5-meo has similarities - yet it is special in a way. It is like a crystal. It is clear and contains everything and nothing. For me, aspects of it do wear off. Afterwards, it’s like I’m my higher Self - yet that sense wears off. Yet there are other aspects that are lasting. For example, 5-meo took me to “Mu” in which I was shown all distinctions dissolve to nothing and then reassemble into distinctions again. This had a profoundly deep impact on me that has lasted. I cannot unsee what I was shown, even if I tried. It was crystal clear and very little effort was needed to “integrate” it. I just wrote out the experience in the 5-meo thread and Leo gave some input that it was one side of a coin, that the other side was still missing, that it was important to get grounded in the side I was shown and how I could integrate/stabilize it. It didn’t take much work. Yet I may have gotten “lucky” and was in the “right place at the right time”. Yet I also think there are many variables at play. Overall, I wouldn’t say that 5-meo is any easier to integrate or has mor abiding effects than other psychedelics. It’s more the nature of the substance. For me, it’s the most lucid and clear. And I agree with what you wrote about psychedelics and how advanced a person is in their practice. I had practiced over 20 years before utilizing psychedelics. I had stable job and life. I was fairly mature and well grounded spirituality. If I had tried to use psychs in my younger years, the impact would have been very different. I think this is one key to understanding psychs - they can have very different impacts depending on the person, their level of development and where they are in life. When I was living in the mountains of Peru, I noticed people refer to Aya as “medicine”. Most people in the towns and villages didn’t see the Aya medicine as being good or bad. Rather, it was beneficial or nonbeneficial depending on a person’s condition.

Well, I guess I fell into that trap a while ago. I have some issues related to self-confidence and self-esteem (they stem from my childhood and my teenage years). When I discovered this whole personal development stuff, I started working on my problems but I quickly switched to meditation, consciousness work, self-inquiry, etc without solving the core issues. Now, I realized this and I "went back" to the main issues, but I still like to read about nonduality, practise Kriya yoga, do daily meditations. I guess I can do both, but I need to find some middle ground. What do you think?

Do you think the future of spirituality is going to become more integral, specifically on this point? Where certain spiritual masters will be adept and well versed across the board from Zen - Shamanism - Yoga - Occult/Paranormal Practices (like in the yogic or shaman schools) - Psychedelics - and do on? I feel like we’re already starting to see at least a theoretical convergence of all this with conferences like Science & Nonduality. This way their teachings and theoretical understanding can apply and serve a wider variety of people who have different weaknesses in their path towards awakening but also their strong points. Personally I think Shinzen Young is a great example of a Buddhist master whose open minded enough to look into even neuroscience, not to mention other meditative traditions. Shunyamurti I think is a good example too, although I have a lot of skepticism over some of his ideologies.

@Cocolove Dreams relate to suppression of desire due to self doubt patterns of thought. Ultimately dreams are pointing to nonduality and the dreamlike nature of reality - in terms of our mental acceptance or nonacceptance. What we are not yet willing to be aware of about ourselves gets categorized by thinking as ‘unconscious’. But it’s more like ‘what we are unwilling to be conscious of’. Trips are not like dreams. Trips are like a dose of Truth to the “unconscious” we created with fear / self doubt. Psychedelics push you into what you’ve been suppressing, and ideally, straight through it. There is a very linear predictable theme to not only trips, but the reemergence / recreation of the ego afterwards.

That's a bad way to frame it. The whole distinction between conscious and unconscious is bogus. There is only consciousness at various levels. Trips are super-conscious. Freud and Jung are not good teachings. They did not understand nonduality. Jung has some redeeeming quilities, but still not good enough for our purposes.

They are one and the same, but they are simultaneously distinct. Just like how a coffee table is located in space, yet it is distinct from space. You can have space without a coffee table. Or space with a coffee table. Phenomena occur inside the witness (we could say). Phenomena are also identical to the witness. And the witness is also distinct from all phenomena. These are various aspects of nonduality which you will have to realize individually, and also together all at once. A good order of progression is first to realize the witness as distinct from phenomena. Then to realize that since the witness is nothing and nowhere, it is everywhere and everything, including all phenomena. Something which is nothing and nowhere is also everything and everywhere. That's what you're missing. The witness is not a point in space, it is omnipresent, sort of like how a vacuum is omnipresent.

That's general advice for all psychs. Our goal here is to recognize nonduality in everyday life. You need to realize what perceptions are. You need to experience your room and your body as God. So that when you arr sober still know that form and formlessness are one. It's SO critical to realize that form and formlessness are identical. Otherwise you're still in duality. Plugging is gonna be a very different experience. Very gentle yet strong and lasting for 60 mins.

@Truth Addict It doesn't matter. Both groups are within nonduality and both groups are God. This is an Apsolute Truth. You can say I'm not God, that would be God. I can say I'm God, that would be God too. It all just depends on if you are the fish who is conscious that it's in an ocean or not. It doesn't matter if the fish is conscious of It or not, the Truth is that it is in a ocean nevertheless.

They didn't look like anything. It was a purely formless understanding. It's just one of the many consequences of nonduality. If you are conscious that everything is nondual, then you realize that you were the dinosuars. Seeing the dinosuars is not necessary to realize this.

@Angelo John Gage You’ve got a sincerity I appreciate. Awakened beings often have a similar feel to me. It can feel polished, shiny and spiritually. There’s a genuine rawness I like about your video. Perhaps due to your life history. Plus I’ve never seen a guy that feels like NJ to me awakening and speak like you. I sensed it immediately. I think it’s really cool and that you can connect within certain crowds that many nonduality teachers can’t. And not just the nonduality, also personal growth and living a good life.

@Angelo John Gage I think this is an awesome video. I think you can resonate with a specific audience better than any nonduality teacher I've seen. I grew up in N.J. and I now live in the Midwest. There is a big population of guys I think you could connect with really well. I'm not making any value judgement here, yet this is the general description: guys that have strong masculine traits and intellect. . . guys that tend to enjoy stuff like trucks, beer, barbques, fishing, hunting, camping, grew up Christian, home-improvement, football, shooting pool etc. It's hard to describe, yet you have the "IT" factor in this "genre". I cannot connect with guys in this genre. I come across as too emotional, yoga-loving, academically arrogant, soft, woo woo etc. I can connect with people in other areas, yet not here. It's like seeing one of the guys I went to high school with in N.J. awaken and come back to help the other guys awaken. I think it is totally awesome. A few comments on the content: -- I love how you framed it as "the real red pill". That is totally what it is. I have tried to use this frame and guys dismiss me because I have zero cred. in this area. But I think you totally pull it off because you've got that cred. with this group. -- I like how you discussed opposites of good and evil as being two sides of the same coin. Going from nonduality back to duality is very difficult to transmit. I particularly like your analogy that life is one giant movie and everyone is playing their role - yet since One Everything is Everything, both good and evil is within Everything. --I think the part about how "you can experience God" could be a bit confusing because it includes both the little dualistic "you" and the One nondual "You". I would have stressed this a bit by saying something like "you can experience God, which is the Ulitmate You - the ultimate You is within Everything. -- I think a lot of terms used to help people learn nonduality can be used essentially as synonyms. Words like Everything, Nothing, Reality, ISness, Oneness, God etc. I would have grouped them all together and maybe say that they are essentially the same. When I was learning nonduality I didn't know that the words are essentially the same and got confused. I noticed at times you would say something like "The One Everything is God". I would have added a bit more to highlight all the words that collapse into one when we enter nonduality. -- I like how you spoke that Christianity teaches the God within. Again, you have the "IT" cred. with guys in this genre. There is no way I could pull that off. I went through a long hardcore atheist scientist stretch and guys in this genre smell it out - they just know that I was not a real Christian that awakened. -- I didn't sense any intellectual arrogance in you. Yet you were confident and intellectual. Again, I think that is hard to do for a lot of intellectuals - I have this academic intellectualism vibe that masculine guys interpret as being arrogant. They can sense I was never part of their group. As hard as I try not to do it, I often come across as talking down to them. -- I like how you used a lot of masculine traits at the end when describing the biggest Red Pill - stoic, leadership, confidence, power - Marcus Aurelius and how he could have had all the power and sex he wanted, but he went for the biggest red pill. The underlying sense for me was "this is a man". I would have lost this audience as I talked about "surrender", getting in touch with one's emotions, like their inner vulnerability etc. Yet you described it as "gaining control of your emotions" - strength. I think there are a lot of people that can benefit from your style and vibe. In particular, I think you can reach a large segment of guys like few other nonduality teachers can. It is awesome to see and I totally wish you the best.

Interesting video. What I always get confused about though is the illusion of free will. We have a choice to believe in nonduality etc. We have a choice to identify with our mind etc. There's good evidence to suggest that we simply do not have free will. Which also makes sense with what you're saying. Everything just happens. So how much influence do we actually have? Think of any thing. Anything at all. An object anything. Where did that thought come from? You can't think a thought before you have thought it...

@mandyjw “Losing the finite mind” and realizing the mind is the entirety of ‘experience’ is a ‘real thing’. Intelligence is not happening in a brain / person, it is every nuance of everything. The birds, computers, the floor, etc, etc, everything is your actual intelligence. It seems ridiculous but it’s true. Roughly worded...it’s a realization there never was a finite mind. Acceptance you create your own reality isn’t understood from a finite perspective. There it gets lumped into a thinking itself, that it is a comment relative to making choices. It’s not. Intelligence of the entirety of your being being ustilized is an actuality. The actuality of this is the opening / bridge / precursor (whatever word works for ya) to clairvoyance, clairaudience, precognition, remote viewing, siddhis, etc. There is one heck of a full circle to spirit guides, etc realized which initially does not jive with finite mind-nonduality. From the finite perspective those seem like ‘abilities’, from the infinite perspective there was an ‘ego’ / limiting mind at play. The aura, via ordinary changes in ordinary habits of food and thought patterns enables the aura as a ‘communictor’, much like someone would say their brain / finite mind enables their communication. Of course the basis of all of this, what makes any of it “possible’ is complete “dream” acceptance / surrender...or Love / the Beauty of life & being.

That’s a metaphor for you. Before you came into this embodied perspective, aka your self or ego, you were one with God (Nothingness). Then you split from God confusing yourself for this separate character. Confusing the true nature of everything that is nonduality with duality. Of course you’ve been God this whole time. Just unknowingly. Start learning to read in between the lines with these very apt metaphors.

@Paul92 I've found that relaxing the mind-body is really helpful. Spending time in nature, yoga, relaxation exercises, listening to heart-centered nonduality speakers etc. Also, I've found direct experience is key. Too much analysis and conceptualization just made things worse for me. The practices and direct experience were helpful.

I don't want to speak for Leo. All I will say is I think this Forum is best when we have a free flow of ideas, even if those ideas are hostile or critical to our own ideas. I think we need to be less defensive and less protective and less controlling and allow this Forum to be an open place where a wide variety of contrasting ideas are considered and debated. Lately, I have had some concerns which I have expressed already and don't want to re-iterate here. The bottom line is I think the Forum is best when it's as free and open as possible. And that means that we get to hear ideas and perspectives that challenge our own. That means that we allow in more than we omit. It's that crucible of many ideas where the magic is allowed to brew and happen. (A) I would like some clarification from Leo as to what constitutes "Nonduality wars". We need to be able to discuss ideas and hash out ideas on here. This issue needs to be clarified. I would like Leo to look at this issue and give us some clearer guidance and leadership here. If the moderators are interpreting "Nonduality wars" in a way that deviates from the intention that Leo has for the Forum, and it might also cause people to be punished in way that Leo doesn't intend for the Forum. Or maybe the vagueness of the rule sets up a space of capriciousness where some people can be selectively punished while others are not. This is why we need clarification as to what "Nonduality wars" includes and does not include straight from Leo, straight from the top. (B) I also think we need clarification of what "trolling" means. I've received warning points by a moderator for trolling whereas I never thought of myself as a troll on here, at least that was never my intention. Please clarify what trolling means and includes Leo. That's another one that's rife for abuse and capricious application if it's not carefully defined. I'm sure all of us can be accused of trolling on occasion, so we need to tighten up when that rule has in fact been violated and when it has not. (C) I also think there needs to be an appeal system in place to Leo for review any decision to award warning points or to issue suspensions by any moderator -- that are appealed to Leo by a member of the Forum. Moderation can be abused and capriciously applied without proper oversight. This is the same reason courts are nested within an appeal framework. This is the same reason why there are checks and balances in government. Unchecked power can be a problem and lead to injustices within the system. And that just taints the whole system, like a bad workplace environment for those of you who know what I'm talking about. We're all human beings, subject to human limitations. That's why we need checks and balances for human beings. I've seen some bias, and I'll leave it at that. Leo knows. I'm pretty sure Leo understands everything I've said here regarding improving the Forum. Now it's on him to decide. I've done my job as I see it by raising some issues that I see are relevant to improving the Forum for the Future. But this is his baby and he's the leader ultimately. I think Leo and I have always had a respectful sharing of ideas, and that's all this is. (D) I see an issue where critical thinking may not be encouraged enough on the Forum . I think part of our work is taking a critical review of your teachings too Leo. And that includes critically examining all teachings, including Leo's teachings. A person can do two things at once: (1) critically examine yourself and (2) you critically examine all teachings too. I don't understand why this is even being resisted on the Forum. This is basic critical thinking. I'm wondering if critical thinking is being valued enough on here now. Video on point to watch for (D):

When opened minded free form exchange of ideas become "Hostile" that is Nonduality Wars. Just leave out the hostility and let the rest remain.

@Paul92 I've found that relaxing the mind-body is really helpful. Spending time in nature, yoga, meditation, hot baths, relaxation exercises, listening to heart-centered nonduality speakers etc. Also, I've found direct experience is key. Too much analysis and conceptualization just made things worse for me. The practices and direct experience were helpful.

@Joseph MaynorThat's "Nonduality Wars" when you put it in that context.

Or maybe I didn't have Kundalini anything. The problem with "masters of one" is that they cannot see, nor can they accept, anything other than their own belief. Also Jan required RASA to take him forward on his path, he was crystalized in the 900's (Rasa scale) and obsessed with the "blue being" he speaks of. Some of the people in the group I was in were visiting Jan for shaktipat (in person) whom were already stable in Self-realization and nonduality; again the things he claims are not present without Kundalini fully awake.

But the translation of that is really "my mind wants to embody enlightenment and it wants enlightenment to stick with me forever" because YOU, outside but including your mind, is already enlightened. All the path to enlightenment is, (in a way the mind can understand) is a deletion of "not required" to get to true nature. Think about it. You are already Self. You are just living from the mind instead of pure Self. In this image, you are both 9, 3 and 6, but the mind in unawakened people only sees 3, in people like us who understand nonduality but are not enlightened, we only see 3 and 6. But the WHOLE TIME we have been either 3 or 3 and 6, we have been 9. 9 not only represents the entire circle but everything outside of the circle. Now, I KNOW this and I understand it, but I only get glimpses of it experientally. Therefore I am not enlightened. One day, hopefully in this lifetime, 3 and 6 will merge into 9 and that's how life will occur to me. I've done all the work already, just gotta wait. And I have noticed the changes. The path to nothing is not all fun!

That's the biggest problem, nonduality becomes just like religion with all its different ideas and interpretations. You can get out of this hole, it is possible for you. It has taken me over two months from waking up in the morning in terror to more or less normalcy. Please do not go and watch Leo's god videos until you are really ready as they will do you a lot of harm. You can watch the Rupert Spira video about solipsism and that helped me a lot. Hell, even go and watch videos of Bob Ross painting, they aren't even about spirituality yet are very calming. I hope it all works out for you.

First of all, nonduality is unprovable. Period. If science were to realize nonduality, it would first have to become self-conscious. This self-consciousness, would be a branch of science that studies science as a whole. This meta-science would have to create a theory of science. Its centralized identity. Then, newly-created branches would have to conform to this identity until stagnation. Then, a question would arise - is science that studies itself conforming to the identity that it created? After a long turmoil - it would have to admit that science does not exist and it has never existed to begin with.