peanutspathtotruth

Honestly I was just confused what you were trying to say as I am now

@Mada_ Maybe take it slow, read both and integrate into your practice what helps you right now. Yes it's a tricky one because it's not what most people tell you. Even those who heard Ramana speak misunderstood him. And most explanations didn't really do it for me honestly. I think Ruper Spira is one of the most down-to-earth guiding points you can find for what Self Inquiry really means. Inquiry implies an active approach. But that can mislead quickly. It's more of a resting in Silence really, and the question "Who Am I" has to be understood correctly to do anything. Either way, I think as long as you explore for yourself, one hour is a solid practice!! By the way, focus is always great as a side practice, can help greatly!

What are you trying to say? Also: Is there no room for honest feedback without getting told that one is triggered? Maybe I am, maybe not. Why does it matter? Why is there always this tendency to not take seriously when someone is critiqued? It's really tiring...

That's why I feel quite skeptical and distanced about you lately, and it's sad to see how strongly you defend your perspectives. Don't you see that to think to be God is STILL duality? The moment you make it anything, it's too much. What you are knows nothing of being this or that. It is Knowing and yet it doesn't know anything about itself. What is an Absolute that has to know itself to be itself? That's duality. You start with the assumption that you can know what you are, that is a belief. You believe you're so very conscious and we are not - don't you see that this is a trap in itself? The very fact that you claim the truth is already showing that you're not getting it. You try to dig deeper and deeper and you don't see that this very trying is making you blind to the simplicity of what You are. And the ways in which you're responding - belittling the insights of others, not even once taking into consideration that there is something you might not understand - is just another sign of your confusion. But you try to portray an act of knowing it all. Now I expect the classic "You're not conscious enough." Maybe for once you're willing to see how you're fooling yourself this way. This is not meant as a personal attack, but as a feedback to your teaching. Only incrementally did your way of teaching become more and more arrogant and I'm just pointing it out. That's how I view it. I tried it before, but you seem to block anything that challenges you.

That's what I have been experiencing for a while now as well. I always think it must be the light source that's flickering but as soon as I stop the "empty gaze" to look around, nothing is flickering at all. But hadn't had these further experiences you're describing. I don't worry about it or anything, but I'm also not really making any story out of that or interpret anything into it. It's all just showing that things are changing.

Yes and even the unlearning is not a doing of someone. Very good point, of course easy to misinterpret. Even consciousness itself is duality. Where conscious and unconscious are not to be found and nobody to understand anything, that's where "one has to go", or rather - that's what one IS, what I AM. And it can be dark and scary as you say. More so than one could ever imagine.

Damn that's a shame. But even in Germany I'm super nervous having ordered mimosa over the internet Gonna do my first extraction this month, really excited

@arlin Whoever claims he has or knows the truth is still ignorant in duality. In Truth, there is no one who can have or know anything. And this is not a word game, it's the underlying kicker of the whole pursuit. Whoever has to teach something still has to learn something. And yet, I think it would be worthwhile for you to see what they are pointing to. BE what you are. Do the practices and drop all mental marathon about who's right or wrong.

@Swagala I also had this thought sometimes that by getting into this work I only started to see my own misery. Many people seem happy, not knowing about their ignorance etc. But that's the point - it seems like that. It's a surface interpretation of what you see. But remember the time you were not at all conscious about these things. It's quite a shallow form of contentment, because it rests on the assurance that the ego structure is nicely perpetuated. And this is not to categorize "others". It's to see things as they are. And still I do think there are people, especially living very close to nature, that intuitively move towards peace despite never having heard of non duality. And yes, of course it's what happens in all of us, for all of us are That. But modern city life greatly distracts most of us from naturally evolving in that direction. Which is exactly as it needs to be right now.

So there's this colleague of mine whom I have been knowing for 5 years now. Around a year ago he started talking to me about star constellations and how he can foresee the future and stuff, so I was already worried. Then, about 7 months ago he quit his job at our company and a short time after that he sent me vocal messages that made clear to me that a psychosis did break out. As I understood it, he took DMT and the latent psychosis broke out. He thinks he knows everything about the world, he is the savior and the apocalypse lies before us. He says his body is made of crystals, he has contact to the nation's presidents and he is writing a book where he adds to Tesla's explorations to explain the whole world. And much more - he is very hysterical about it and he wants us all to believe him. He sleeps with a knife in his hands because he's scared his neighbours would rape him, he recently jumped out of a window on LSD and had to go to the hospital. He was allowed to come back to his old job and he brought this behaviour into work - I had to intervene because we all felt threatened, so he's out again. He doesn't want to see that he needs help. His best friends are trying to convince him for months now. The parents don't know what to do. A psychological emergency was alarmed, the police as well, but somehow they didn't find it necessary to get him into a mental hospital. Here in Germany, you can't force someone into a mental hospital, only they themselves can have themselves commited. Only if he threatens someone can you do something. And although I'm not close to him, I'm worrying about him. He could kill himself. He could hurt others. The psychosis could become unhealable, if it isn't already. Everyone who knows him is worried. We don't know what to do. We want to help but we don't know how. Does anyone have any idea what could be done?

Self Inquiry is not focus work. I like how Rupert Spira says you could also call it "Self-Abidance". You may have to start with focus to see where you're not seeing things clearly. But then, it's just a relaxation, a sinking back into your Self. Every focusing or doing of any kind is already getting you away from it. And I would not say going into your heart centre is the "same" as self inquiry - although it really depends, it is too subtle to discuss here. But at least it is really helpful to get out of the ever-doing mind. To feel into the heart always "helps me" to surrender.

The confusion comes from saying "YOU" are God. No, you are not God. That's just more duality. Take away the you and see what's left. I know what the words are pointing to, but to add anything to I AM is too much. Even I AM is too much.

@outlandish Yes, we all try to be there and watch what happens. I'm a little worried the storm won't pass. It's been 6 months or so and it's getting worse. He's still taking drugs which doesn't make it any better. I'm really scared it's going to be permanent which is really possible. @Manjushri Yes I know, you're right... The thing is, we can't do anything. I have no idea how to handle even a communication with him. I'm telling him I believe anything he says because I don't know what happens if I don't believe him. His friends try to tell him he needs help. But he says he can handle it with tea and detox.... You know, I just have this hope that a professional could help him. I don't know, probably nature and physical work and complete withdrawal from media and the city would be a great start. I just don't know what to do...

@AleksM You're doing the exact same thing, just saying. There are so many people who say they can astral project who have no clue about real spiritual insight. Easily recognizable in the new age overflow right now. I'm not saying you're wrong, but I'm very very skeptical about your conclusions.

@PenguinPablo Yes, it's a theme always coming back for me. This is a great starting point for inquiring even deeper. At one point, you see that everything - your thoghts, your visual perception, your aural perception, your body sensations etc. - all you're experiencing is basically the same. Without interpreting it's just " " (THIS). That's where it also gets really practical because you see that suffering during one experience and not during another is a blindness to that fact.

"The Tree of Life"! My favorite of all time!

I followed the advice I was given here in this forum to get into psychotherapy as a help for this work. Today I had my first pre-session where the focus was to assess what is the appropriate direction of therapy I should get into. And somehow this experience crushed me a bit. Let me explain: The therapist wanted me to just tell her "what's going on". I honestly told her all that I thought might be relevant for her to know to get a picture of me. I tried to get across as clear as possible that I'm actually pretty happy and there's no acute problem - it's more like I would like to get help working on my shadow. I didn't hold back on anything. I told her about the spiritual work I do, what this means, how it changed me and how I fear she wouldn't even understand. I told her about my psychedelic use, how much it helped me and how and why I use them. I told her openly about past addictions, current addictions. I was being as precise and honest as I could possibly be while trying to take into account that she might have no idea about consciousness work. She made several guesses of what's going on. Things like "I feel like you're running away from the 'normal life' and you seem to have problems in normal conversations with people." And while trying to see her point, I felt that she always tried to categorize me in her mind. All guesses she made were a miss. I still tried to see the truth in what she said. In the end, she repeatedly said that it is a problem that I do 'so much drugs'. The formulation and the way she said that clearly gave me the feeling of a generalized idea of drugs in her head. When I left, I felt very disconnected from myself. I felt misplaced, not understood despite opening myself up completely. I was totally transparent. And I was asking myself "might she be right?". But my innermost feeling still tells me that there's just a way too big discrepancy of consciousness between her and me, as well as a lack of consciousness in the practice of therapy in general. I feel like therapy and consciousness work can only go hand in hand when the therapist him/her-self has a clear understanding of spirituality and how it transcends and interacts with classic psychological systems. Let's take the topic of psychedelics for example. I'm open to the possibility that I might use them too often. And I might take a break for integration. But from which standpoint does the therapist evaluate the situation? Just yesterday, I read the new MAPS newsletter. I'm up to date on psychedelic research. In addition, there is the first person experimentation I do myself and that of this community here. When a therapist doesn't even know the current state of research on this subject, how could she possibly assess this correctly? That was a very sobering experience. I don't think therapy might actually have a benefit in this work for me personally, I even feel it would rather confuse me. Yes, a transpersonal therapist who is fitting might be a possibility. But that's sadly not an option. Every talk with my best friends who are on the same path are extremely helpful in understanding myself. My best friend can tell me: "You know, you're someone who likes to start things, but you're alway skipping at some point. And you know that. You gotta pull it through and don't let yourself lose your vision." That was so helpful. This community here is helpful. Reading is helpful. Meditation, journaling, psychedelics, inquiry, contemplation, it's highly beneficial. Is psychotherapy really that valuable? I have to say I'm doubting that. I would love your opinions on this. This is of course a highly personal view.

@Scholar Thank you for this, I found it profoundly beautiful and inspiring. I'm not sure I'm "as far" as you seem to be when it comes to transcending certain things, but there's this strong feeling in me... When you say "fairytaleness" and "magic", my heart starts to glow. For I know what you mean. And sometimes I'm so confused by all the theory that makes it seem(!) so cold, that I'm not sure if I feel drawn to the magic because my ego likes a colorful play. But then there are moments when I see so clearly that it's the universe that likes a colorful, beautiful, magical, mysterious exploration of itself. It's kind of the point. First I turned away from art, for all seemed meaningless, delusional, a mere distraction. Now, I appreciate way more art than before, for the exploration of even one single emotion in a story for example holds so much beauty. Everey facet of this world becomes so meaningful. Dance. Music. Art. Movement. Stillness. A conversation. A sip of tea. As a concept "those are all just experiences" etc. Yes, but they are all the magic of life/god unfolding. And it's fucking beautiful. Thank you for making me more aware of that ??

@Smurfinstein I'd recommend as an "experiment" to try 30 or even 60 minutes. Do that a couple of times and 30 will feel like 5. I went from 1 hour to 2 and it was one of the best things I could do. It was challenging but sometimes you gotta commit to see why you're struggling.

Totally with you here, but what has that to do with "ignoring" fear? It's the opposite in my experience. To stand as your Self despite fear includes recognizing and acknowledging the fear fully. Ignoring it would be the same as resisting it. So I'm not sure you really meant ignorance the way I'm understanding it?

I'm not sure ignoring fear is a smart way to deal with it

I had the same thought when I watched the first video of Roger two days ago. I just took a look in the book "1000" by Ramaji. Ramesh has been Ramaji's guru/teacher. And Ramaji assesses him somewhere in the 700's. In other words: He's not gone all the way. Of course this is just a number. But the takeaway should be: Look closely at how deep the teacher in front of you has really gone. For pointers that get you to "no-self", they can still be helpful. But beyond that, they might not.

Read my statement again, but realize that when I say "You", I'm actually talking about myself. When I say "you realize what a wreck you really are" I'm talking about how that happened for myself and how that is generally the case for most seekers. Maybe you will get more out of it that way, it was not in any way a solution, it was to share with you how I see it. And to expand: Yes, this journey so far has greatly improved my life and made me way happier, but not in the slightes the way I expected it to. I didn't know what I really wanted before I went in. So in a sense, I'm really tapping into true happiness for the first time. As I said, pain and pleasure have nothing to do with it though. Would never go back.

@khalifa Did you already try the Yoga Nidra I recommended you? I tell you, it really helps

@arlin You should never forget that to be happy and peaceful in this life is one of the things we want to investigate here. Why am I not happy? Why am I suffering so much? This work is like a magnifying glass and you see what a wreck you really are. You see the incredible pain of living in the illusion of separation, the pain of resistance. So in a sense, you uncover your suffering and feel it fully for the first time. This can seem like a step back. But as you might know, truth is much more powerful than ignorance, so when you keep going and fearlessly investigate this suffering, there comes a contentment despite pain. The objective is not to make pain go away. That will never happen. It's a reorientation towards whatever is experienced. And this happens to be deeply connected to seeing and surrendering to what is true.