peanutspathtotruth

I'm gonna play devil here and confront what you're saying. How can you know that it is not working just because you "feel" like it doesn't? How would you know what you're missing out on if you're not giving this technique a true shot, not for a few weeks or months, but for a few years? (Or have you actually done this? Doesn't sound like it) What if the true reason for doing this only reveals itself far down the road, when you have kept AND transmuted the energy for a very long time? Of course I completely respect your opinion, and I'm not saying you're wrong, but, saying this in a kind and constructive manner - it feels to me like you're only justifying an already hardened position, and your reasoning seems not very strong or convincing to me.

@Nani Hey, I'm sorry for the pain you're feeling, I know it can be difficult. Regarding your question - this can be very confusing, I agree. I think it doesn't make sense to apply a realization from higher consciousness to the ego level of functioning. This quickly turns into an ignorance of responsibility. What you might have to realize instead for now is that you are 10000% responsible to handle your life. And you are more than capable This is not coming from outside or because you should. It's because it's the only way you will be able to draw the power to break addictions, pursue what you value and work towards higher consciousness. This might help you as well:

@martins name First experience directly after waking up was amazing, cleared the fog and silenced all negative self talk, as well as infusing my body with joy and love. Will come back when I tried it for a few days ??

@Nahm @Forestluv You two always give the kindest, most practical advice Very inspiring! @Forestluv When you talk about Breathwork, do you refer to shamanic breathing/holotropic Breathwork?

The most authentic and powerful metta meditation in my experience is just focusing and surrendering to the "feeling" of love in the heart, which at some point consumes everything. As such, it's an amazing entry point for inquiry and do nothing meditation. I'm not sure about this, but might the thinking about loving others and oneself just be a way to trigger this spark? To me at least directed love feels quite limited compared to the essence of the love itself, in which one can simply bathe ?

I see where you were going now, I fully agree! Bit of a word game, what I labeled pain you label the sensation of pain, what you label pain I usually call suffering. I read the book and remember the dentist story, pretty cool ??

The purification process will be even more intense, way more intense probably. Just be sure you feel ready to handle that. Maybe start very carefully with your doses.

Very true. I think an important point to add is that especially with vaped psychs like DMT or 5, it is crucial to keep going when the fear is not completely dissolved on the first or second hit. Martin Ball really emphasized this point - to complete the arc to a final point of release. No matter how much terror, when it is resolved in the end and seen to be false, the mind easily flushes it out. But if one stops there and doesn't go all the way, it can be traumatizing. I think that's also how trauma in general works, you go through a process but don't reach the point of resolving the pain, so it stays and gets suppressed.

@4201 I see what you mean, thank you for sharing your thoughts. Of course it's important not to fall into clinging to the idea of being awake. I'm not sure if that was directly connected to what I was pointing at, because I didn't really imply any of that. While pain can be self generated and surrendering is always the best option, I don't see what you mean by saying that pain being unavoidable would be ridiculous. There is pain that won't go away, no matter how surrendered one is. Why would it be directly connected to believing one is awake? And why would it automatically mean that one is unawakened. You can be completely enlightened and feel intense pain having no correlation to your level of consciousness whatsoever. The difference is of course how the pain is related to then. I hope that makes sense. Just want to clear up confusions about what was said before if I understood you right

@martins name Thank you for sharing this, I feel like that's exactly what I need. I just got the book and am looking forward to try her methods out. ♥️

@4201 It's so interesting to read this - I experience these headaches as well, especially when a lot of purification is involved, but I also had been having them being sober for a very long time. I found it so fascinating, but also frustrating that I could never make out if it was physical or energetical and/or both in its nature. I spent a whole meditation retreat almost exclusively inquiring into this pain. I now think that it is mostly energetical and has to do with blockages in the third eye. That's what it feels like, even without believing in chakras or anything. It feels like something can't flow. And I also tend to think that the physical pain is part of it as well, but that it is caused by the energetic blockage. That's amazing If they do come back though - I don't think it is accurate or helpful to think that a headache is telling you you're doing something wrong or lost the realization or whatever. Please don't feel bad when it happens

@levani To address your question, there are many points to consider, but overall it seems that when one is free of psychological barriers and especially free of wrong identifications, addictions are way easier to handle. For me personally, every addiction seems to be linked to one or more specific shadow sides. With porn for example I can see guilt, shame and insecurity to be a big factor. Working through these, it's easier to tackle the addiction. Addictions are still physical, so it will be uncomfortable either way. It's just that when one can see through why the addiction formed in the first place, it is much less powerful to convince you to go back to it.

Not sure where you have this generalized idea from, but as far as I have understood it, grace plays a major role in many eastern spiritual traditions. It is precisely the understanding that at one point there is no action that you can perform that brings you to awakening. It is the un-doing of all manipulation, the surrender of all thought. When one had a true glimpse into Truth, there is no need for faith. There can be real trust, coming from direct experience. I find trust in reality, in God, in grace to be extremely important.

@Chimera I was so confused when these spasms started happening. They did go to an exorcism level on psychedelics at one point. It's a sign of energetic release and purification, so don't worry Energy is moving.

Never say never Isn't that what we want to help prepare? The road to a world that lives in 100% truth? Maybe it takes a few million years, but I do think it's where it all might lead to.

"When I don't know what I am, I serve you. When I know what I am, I am you. No matter what, I love you."

It's the same question asked here so many times before. I was in doubt many times, because some people like Sadhguru say that psychedelics fuck with your energy system. In a sense that's true - so does intense meditation though. It's gonna be tough at times either way. No retreat will be IT. No trip will be IT. Neither will daily meditation be IT. I think all of them are tools, every meditation, every trip, every retreat etc is purifying one's system, sharpening one's mind, raising one's consciousness. They all can contribute, but also they all can possibly be misused or become irrelevant.

In a sense yes, but you can't really prepare for a breakthrough. It's either full surrender or not. The substance itself, also in small doses, feels very very nice. I also experienced panic a few times, mainly due to being scared to stop breathing. Many people report this same fear, it's quite common. To me, it was the last barrier - to be okay with actually dying, while simultaneously trusting that the body will breath by itself (albeit very slowly) when you do reasonable, safe doses. On the other side it is very clear then that fear is nothing without thought, so all thought needs to be surrendered. When you're really unsure about your breathing, maybe sit somewhere instead of lying down, it helped me once. I haven't gone in nearly enough - I'm still scared of my own panic. Loving and trusting is the way.

Fuck, this somehow really strucks a chord. It's such a beautiful understanding and way to perceive, and it makes a certain coldness that is surrounding this whole "do it on your own" thought completely disappear. It truly feels like a step forward into love and embodiment. That's what commUnity can be.

@Shiva99 I feel you! I'm also on my way out of this, but I learned this much: It is an addiction. And it most probably is connected to some suppressed feelings - as you said, maybe suppressing sexual desire, but could also be guilt, shame, etc. Of course these are tied to the act, and when you relapse - there you go. I really think it's immature and myopic of people to be skeptical about why you feel this way after three months. You do feel this way, so penetrate the feelings and learn what they are telling you. I doubt an addiction is worked through in such a short timeframe. Depends on how long one has been primed. I feel like the only way is to confront and welcome the feeling of horniness, not giving in to thinking and fantasizing as best one can, and indeed transmuting the energy, using it for spiritual practice, exercise, relationships, creativity etc. You got this

This is so damn true. I recently read in a classic personal development book that we go from dependence to independence to interdependence. This really hit me, even in the spiritual sense. You could see it from many angles, but to me it stood out to see that: yeah it's actually amazing not to be independent of anything else. Being the oneness of everything, how could a part of it be independent? This also greatly applies to relationships. Having the foundation of being independent, being whole and in harmony in oneself, only then is true interdependence possible. And it's beautiful, not weak. Ram Dass talks about this is in "Going Home" on Netflix. Very touching. Quite a new angle for me.

I once took 2CB because I was a bit scared of DMT but still wanted to inquire into reality. Had a great time and came to this classic point of feeling immensely confident to go DEEP. So I quickly looked up the cross effects of 2CB and DMT - very safe to use and synergetic effect, okay cool! So I took a hit out of the GVG and while looking at my lamp, I just casually became the lamp. The lamp (or rather: my whole experience) was the whole universe. Just silent witnessing of myself being this visual field, focusing on my lamp, nothing else. Did this a few times. At one point I took another hit and knowingly prepared myself for the DMT to rush in. Nothing happened. I was a bit perplexed and waited a few minutes. I thought: probably that was enough and somehow the 2CB inhibited the DMT or something. About 30-60 minutes in, I felt increasingly euphoric. Like a cosmic clown, I became so happy and joked around with myself. Then I realized what might have happened, so I quickly checked the receptacles where I stored the substances. "Oh no.... I smoked MDMA." While being at peace and super conscious, I almost had not realized that I was tripping balls all the time. There just were hardly any thoughts, so I kind of missed that and took the wrong receptacle. I was terrified because I knew MDMA can lead to serotonine syndrome. I quickly made an online search and was relieved the three substances were cool together. While being very funny in a sense, I took it to the heart. This could have been a disaster, it could have been my death. If it would have been 5-MeO instead of MDMA (or in fact any other substance which would not have interacted well with the other two), it could have gone very serious very quickly. Since then I'm super careful, especially when I'm redosing when already tripping. Labeling the receptacles is another good idea I came up with just then.

This is incredible... I mean, did you just energetically feel how you are transmitting something to her? I know this insanely clear feeling of being able to channel energy and realization. Was that what you did? Or did you talk to her or whatever? When this was actually what triggered here, that's so magical isn't it? Of course it's also dangerous (obviously) to fuck around with another being's energy system.

Only season 1 when it came out, I loved it! Gonna restart now, thanks for the recommendation. And @Nahm, gonna check out Evil as well