Aquarius

Aww this whole post is so pleasant and made me smile. Thanks for sharing the knowledge with me! Right now I don't have the resources to work on my diet, but thanks so much and I will contemplate it in my meditation. Now I see your point and I am so grateful. Yes, our brethren and sisters need to be protected. Also do you think plants suffer if you eat them? Or are they unconscious of what is happening? Trees are quite smart btw. I read a book once about how they protect themselves from being eaten. The food chain is a real thing. I once entered a digital art contest about food chain. Wanna see my winning entry? I wasn't the winner but I got into the semi-finale.. I cannot find it right now but the whole thing was the animal food chain drawn with all animals normally living the ecosystem and eating each other.. and on the top the MAN with the crown and two bags of dollar being proud. The animals all cried. Thanks again for opening my mind. If my mind was more lucid I could walk you through the yin yang stuff I meant. But I don't wanna get into that because I'm on medication and might start more drama. I'm not as evil as I might seem. I just have shadows too. And ego.

I'm not trolling. Stop attacking me! You guys are full of hate! I wasn't blue, I just had blue stuff going on. I was yellow when I registered at 19 years old but I had blue shadow. Because of the upbringing. And yet again I don't care about your opinion but your skepticism stresses me out. How would you feel if I threw a label on you? A harsh one like "troll"? I remember when I wrote something in the relationships subforum I got the same response. That I'm not a girl, but a male troll.. very nice of you guys. I seriously was seeking help and if I was a troll, why would I even post such detail and there is an obvious suffering going on in me. Just read all the posts. And I don't even believe in the SD model right now anymore cause it's full of shit. Dramatic change is possible especially if one is working on oneself nonstop 24/7. I am not a troll. I suffer and seek genuine help. And I do not seek to change my family. Yes it's true, you cannot change someone. I just wish to live in harmony with their beliefs. They're not idiots. They need no change. They are perfect the way they are. I'm just discussing serious stuff with them. And they are great listeners. I had some blind spots and I opened my mind more to some stuff in these 4 months if that's what you mean.

Ideology? I'm open to change actually. Tell me what I did wrong and I will try to change myself into a better human! What do you think was ideological about my beliefs? Or the whole post? I agree that I tend to cling to my beliefs sometimes. I try to remain humble. Thanks for pointing that out to me. Sometimes I see the same comments about Leo's work. Nobody is immune to ideology it's true. I am patiently waiting for your insights. Who?

@Scholar Dude I'm sorry.. I had a higher perspective, that's not what I meant by ying and the yang. You didn't receive the message I had for you. I wasn't clear enough. Just forget everything I said cause that's not what I meant. Thanks for re-writing your message again, now I could understand. Your English is very good so sometimes I lose my connection to the concepts and only see words without meaning, I might be dislexic or something similar. Thank you for showing me my flaws. I will consider becoming vegan in the future. I was just having this ' i dont care' mood all day. I needed that wake up slap from you. Namaste and thank you again for opening my eyes and not letting go of me so easily. I'm hard to deal with, because I have sociopathic tendencies. I do suffer yes. I am open to your perspective. I was hoping you would open to mine. It's not like you say it is, the things. You interpreted my message the wrong way. I need to develop my English skills. I'm not a scholar. I hope we will have similar good convos in the future. Thank you.

Good info. Drew, you really Know what you talk about. Yes, I will try to be more receptive. I tend to be argumentative and defensive even, I agree. But my diet options are horrible. My family is killing me if I eat too little.. kills me if I eat too much. To each its own. Every plant requires different grooming methods and has different needs. Just like humans do.

@JosephKnecht Covid-19 is full of shit.

@Fkdel Aw thanks this made me feel good. But for me my family is not that bad. We had an ugly fight when I made the whole original post. I can tell them any nasty stuff about myself and they are not judging me. I might have distanced myself from them so my vision of their behaviors wasn't too clear, maybe was even a bit autistic. They are older and kinda naive, not made for life. All of them get money from government because of illness and cannot work. I need to differ from them. But I am helping them with models like maslow or spiral. I feel like a strong person now and they are not bothering me. If they say their crazy stuff I just laugh and mind my own business.

I skipped Orange. I am now integrating it, see my other posts and my journal about shadow work and alpha personality. I know you're not attacking me, I am an empath and attack feels differently. You actually had clear arguments which were valuable for me even if I didn't show it. I appreciated your posts! What if I don't want to? If you had those abilities do you think you would go around bragging and showing off? Do you know what danger that means? I don't even mention what kind of abilities I have. Because then I am asked to prove. It doesn't work that way. I don't want to prove anything. You guys can choose to believe me or not. I couldn't care less. Meh.

Hey thanks I really liked your post. The thing is.. whatever I write you guys dissect it and make it into something which might not be true. Just to prove me I have an ego. Which I know I do have. Cause I'm alive, im not dead. Survival is real, yes. I admit that I got an ego lashback when I saw the person attacking me, so my ego rose and fought back. It's true it's true. I am not deluded. The way I write is because I have a personality. I do have a personality and a sense of humour and all that baggage I refuse to let go of. I'm young. And even after ego death, you still have a personality and preferences. We are not robots, after all. You're welcome! Hope you enjoy subliminals. I don't identify with anything but then what should I say? Oh wait. I could just remain silent and ignore everyone. But then, oh wait. Everyone will think that I'm now angry. And giving the silent treatment like Aquarians do. haha You guys do assume a lot of things that might not be true about me. Anyway the thing is... I love my life. I am healthy now. My relationship is saved from my ugly shadow that I integrated quite nicely all by myself. I have friends. I have food and shelter. My love needs are met and I practice self love, which is the highest teaching, yes. I think this thread is just getting overcomplicated with mental masturbation. But I love a good argument sooo I am not offended i am calm while i write everything here. you guys might misunderstand me because well idk. I have a temper i do. Some see Leo as Turquoise and even he is sometimes laughing at stupid stuff that he usually ignores Honestly I start caring less and less about labels. I think this talk is helping me. Thanks dude, cheers

Psychological therapy, cognitive behavioral or humanistic psychologist. I was meaning that dogs are dangerous so in a way it is rational to fear them. So avoid them. And irrational animals because they lack thinking mind, they're instinctual unlike humans. Also, I'm sorry you're going through this. I've been attacked many times. Fearing a simple dog would make no sense if you can see that they are friendly. But fearing a hoard of dogs is rational cause they attack when in gangs. There is an exercise where you detach from your fear. Like instead of trying to worry about your fear of dogs, and struggling to avoid the fear of dogs, you let the fear wander freely in your mind, and view it as a cloud. Let yourself feel freely. You may cry and release emotions which is normal. Try 7 cups therapy. They have a cool chat bot and exercises and level up and all. Just google 7cups

This whole SD model is fun and cool and all. But it's quite simplistic. Everyone is so complex. There is no such thing as ordinary human beings. That notion needs to be gone! People are so complex and cannot be boxed in one group. SD model is a science. Sociological science. Science likes to measure and put things into boxes. I don't even feel like using it since it's only useful as a tool of showing you where you should end up. But everyone has their own rules and thinkings, and everyone is so unique. Even the simplest man has a complex life. And reality is mysterious and the mysteries are vast. I don't like how some of you just come to this forum to argue with each other. Why cannot we see the big picture?

What makes you think that? Where is your evidence? OR are you just parroting Leo's words? And again, this is just a model, and is a map, not the real world. Wake up to reality.

You guys were assuming I created an identity of myself being a Turquoise person who looks down on the Blue person who lives next to her. But this is not a hierarchy ladder, just a model of values. Like who appreciates what in life. Simple as that. You are not a better person if you are Turquoise. And 0.1% of society is still thousands of people. And those are still estimates. And old ones. Leo really made the whole values system seem like a hierarchy. Really? Cool have fun then Love to help a friend have a good laugh I'm also having fun arguing. I get your guys points of views though. And I think they are valid. I might have exaggerated a bit in some places. Also remember I was in an asylum for 1 month after kundalini awakening. So the first half of my post is not what I am right now. I am not the sum of my past mistakes. So no resentments whatsoever from my part. Keep enjoying.

That's exactly what I didn't do. I didn't create an identity around being turquoise. But this thing is just a model. I first thought it's just having those values like the stages. And yes thank you for formulating it differently than Raccoon. I understand what he meant now. Probably im not Turquoise, but I have supernatural abilities and friends who are supernatural. We have our small secret circles everywhere. And this is just a model. It's not perfect. Any secret underground occultist could be Coral. Coral are usually criminals who operate on global stage but you don't know their name. Rich guys. Zeta males and females. I wasn't taking the whole model seriously like you guys do. I don't care if I'm Turquoise or not. If I call myself Yellow with a pinch of supernatural, would you guys please stop attacking me? I just wanted to create a fun study of the behaviors between stages.

Not really. It all comes naturally. If you are trying hard, you're not allowing. Just keep allowing. Get in flow state. Enjoy love, blessing, life, infinity, God. It's more a state of BEING (god) rather than DOING+HAVING (ego). I'm not too good at explaining cause I never had the theory. I just have the experience. Some people get lost in theory while never getting to experience the eternal NOW. Which is the only thing that is and always was. There is no past or future. You always been here (now). tadaa That's a grounding exercise btw. Felt like you needed it.

Wow.

Look, I'm just human. The world needs the good and the bad, the light and the dark, the male and the female, and the beyond of those dualities. It's obvious that we are disagreeing on very fundamental stuff. I dropped the spiral dynamics stuff because I didn't wanna argue anymore. Seeking peace and no arguments. I assumed it bothered you so i didn't continue. I am honest. Agreed, good point on the S&M, but words and mental masturbation won't stop slavery. Did you do something today that stopped slavery? Other than speak up against it? I did do actions on the words I said before on the forum, like literally healing and enlightening people. And I did meet people who see the devil in I, in me, Aquarius user. I feel like you really hate me for some reason. Or maybe you just hate my ideas. So please, if you feel like attacking something, attack my ideas, not me. I am we. We are you. You do not have to do shadow work, only if you want to heal yourself. It was a mere suggestion, not a need. I am just simply everything right now and everything is Perfect and Love. Infinite Love. Maybe contemplate this gif for insights.. And this gif explains how your mind is working right now: I read the other half of your writings but my mind just doesn't compute. And I also don't understand good and evil. Because I'm thinking of non-dual terms. And idk your whole post feels like mental masturbation. Go out there and smell a rose. Would do better for your mind and spirit than trying to defeat me in an "argument" that doesn't even exist. Because I don't actually disagree with you. Just slightly differ in opinion. I never said you were wrong. I just showed the way I think. I think your perspective is interesting and valid. And I've been there before, maybe. Thank you for showing me your mind's content. Is interesting and maybe when I'm less tired I will have that "aha" moment you trying so hard to give me.

Today was a productive day. I achieved some minor stuff, but lots of them. Still got art stuff pending. My art business is on hold right now, cause I'm doing self-help, taking care of my self, pampering myself, enjoying myself. The astrals allow me a bit of that sensual pleasures.. yet.. I feel like I have no time for anything. I'm also lazy as fuck. and in the same time, I feel like I got too much free time on my hands. it's weird, really! I'm reading religious texts. I would not call that stage blue, the stuff I'm reading. Some religious people are stage yellow. rare occurence. Dr. R. C. Sprout for example is a systematic theologian. First time I heard the therm. I'm reading his book called: Does God Control Everything? It's really good for minor insights, cool stuff in there honestly. A light read. I drank two coffees but nothing. I am just lazy today, even if it seems I achieved tons of stuff... but those were minor stuff. I am too harsh with myself, but I need it because of my spoiled ego trap where I tend to be too lazy because I feel like I achieved a lot already. I think I might spend the rest of the day reading random short stuff. I just feel like letting loose today. I did have a serious talk with my family about the way they overdose me with psychiatric meds though. I am no lab rat or tester. I refuse to take this injection in high doses. Not higher than 25mg at least. Paliperidone.. (Xeplion) Anyone had issues with the medicine called Paliperidone? I only see bad reviews of it on YouTube but for me it helps just I feel I lose my creative vibe. I need to remind myself it is only a phase. This shall all pass.

We are living in a non-dual world, and evil is just the opposite of what the ego wants. Or with other words, evil is what ego fears. Okay, let's drop the spiral dynamics cause it doesn't help. And idk some people just enjoy being slaves. I had many people begging to be my slave so I have no response to that, I'm no encyclopedia haha. You're very defensive. Ego is defensive. Let go. Stop living in a bubble. All this new age vegan stuff is all nice but hard to implement. I would do it if I had the chance. You don't need to convince me to stop eating meat. You have serious shadow work to do my friend..

You should get therapy. It's irrational fear, but it has a base, and it's in your subconscious. Maybe if you work a bit on your self development and enlightenment you can achieve no-fear state. That's where I am now. But I have moments when I fear dogs as well. They are instinctual and irrational animals so yeah. Avoid them then?

hahahaha i dont honestly care about your opinion you just seem jealous why even make this post some of you guys are honestly toxic do you know me or what I do in real life? have you met me and experienced my supernatural abilities? Oh yeah, no? okay, then?

I've been like him at that age. I always felt lonely in my theories... I agree with Leo, spirituality is hardwired in some people. I'm an earth angel myself. That stuff is real. Good to hear this planet has people like him.

True! But maybe in two days cause I just got my medication and it creates fever from physical effort. I, however, might go for a walk. Not really feeling like it. I do cardio inside my home cause of huge halls. I lost a lot of water mass and built muscle since yesterday. Ate tons of meat and ran about 10 km. I look sweet.

Not selfish, just how nature works. Humans are part of nature. You have a strong stage green ego. Nothing wrong with eating meat. There is cruelty - free ways of slaughtering animals which is a bit better than the way most humans do. Life is cruel. Not all fluffy and pink rainbows.

My day is good so far. I finished more than I thought I would, and faster than I thought it's possible. I think I will take a break now and meditate and gain insight on life. Or just relax. I have all day still. Guys! Anything productive that I can do today? That is mildly difficult?