tatsumaru

While this might be true for a lot of people I don't agree that this is a universal truth about power. Power is just power. Sadhguru is pretty powerful - is he a coward? Power is just one aspect of duality and the degree to which smth is powerful is dependent on what it is being compared to. A business mogul could be powerful compared to an ant, but is he powerful compared to a supernova? What if one used their power to create an environment that is conducive to spiritual enlightenment - would that be an act of cowardice?

I've experienced this kind of peace when I decide that peace of mind is sufficient and that a peaceful life is a successful life. However the moment that I decide that I want to understand life the pain comes back. It's paradoxical because the thought cannot understand life only recycle what's already there, but at the same time there doesn't seem to be anything else that can understand life either or at least I haven't experienced any such sense or meta-sense. So I either have to accept that I don't have the capacity to uncover the secrets of life which kind of means I am just a peaceful waiting to die zombie or that there's someway of going further. Keep in mind that the great Taoists and Buddhists had great insights about the meta-principles governing life, universe and the beyond - so it seems they had some way of connecting with this supreme knowledge or as a fried called it gnowledge (from gnosis i.e. using the heart to know rather than the intellect). I just don't know how to open my heart to what life has to teach me.

I've listened to all Sadhguru videos multiple times. There is plenty of supernatural. In fact most of the cases I list in my opening post are taken out of Sadhguru's videos. He makes these claims - you change your genetics, you can heal yourself, you can manifest a goddess, you can read a book just by touching etc.

If observing nature is the best path, then what is the difference between science and spirituality?

Show me how it is when you are God. Are you just resting in your awareness escaping from the mystery of phenomenon or are you in control? I do not make any claims as to what is possible and what isn't. Other people are making those claims and don't have anything to show for it. You seem to be making them as well. You claim it can imagine healing its own leg. Is this in your experience or is it just a belief? Show me that it is possible. Naropa healed his whole body after he jumped from a cliff hundreds of years ago, so it doesn't seem to have anything to do with time. I am not interested in belief systems and religions.

Sorry, but this is not at all relevant to the question I am posing. Also it's just a fancy way of saying - creation unfolds slowly and is time dependent. If anything has changed in our society so far its because of science and technology it's not because of gurus learning to manifest more powerfully. There isn't a single guru who can manifest anything as far as I am concerned. In fact if spiritual legends are to be trusted there were way more buddhas and magicians back in the time of the buddha. I don't mean to be cynical but there's simply no evidence that anything of what you are saying is true. Sounds like wishful thinking.

I am referring to this video: I want to start out by saying that I am willing to entertain the notion that Leo's explanation of reality might be 100% true. However... I still have some objections to the video: 1. Am I in Leo's imagination, or is he in mine? Are we both in God's imagination? If so why is my awareness limited to my perceptions and experiences only? Why is Leo more spiritually advanced than me if we are being imagined by the same thing - what is the value in imagining less-spiritually developed beings? 2. If psychedelic hallucinations are real, then why is it that people on psychedelics who jump from their balconies to fly actually fall and die? Why do people return from a PCP trip to find they have killed their family and ate someone's finger? It doesn't seem plausible that one would imagine this upon coming down from their PCP trip. It also seems to happen on specific psychedelics as well suggesting that the psychedelic is more responsible for the end-result than the one taking them. 3. He says one is able to do anything as long as they are willing to let go of their current state/dimension/w/e . In other words if I am willing to be completely obliterated in this dimension with no trace of ever existing/complete suicide, then I should be able to imagine myself as a night elf in a mystical forest. How does this work? Why doesn't Leo prove that it's possible instead of just saying it? 4. All these ugly buildings in my city are too unsophisticated to be imagined by an artist like me. I don't see how I imagined these. If I had to imagine a city I would do a way prettier job, so it doesn't seem likely that I imagined this. 5. This might be obvious but why would I imagine cancer or aging? 6. If I am the one who's imagining everything the why are there people who know stuff that I don't know and why do I not know everything there's to know? 7. If god is eternal and has always been where he is as the foundation of everything else, then why does it exist. Why is there something rather than nothing? 8. Why is anything imagined in the psychedelic state gone once the chemical is cleared out of the system? 9. And last but not least - If I am in control then why is life so god damn hard? Why isn't it at least a bit more effortless and easy? What is the value of everything being so hard? Suffering 10 torments of hell for one brief moment of happiness. I know that probably I don't really get what Leo's saying and I also realize there's nothing in common between Ego and Awareness however the questions still stand - doesn't really matter whether I tatsumaru, or I awareness or I god imagined all this. For pain and suffering to exist I would have to imagine them in the first place - why would I imagine anything like that? Also consider this... When we are dreaming at night and especially if we learn to lucid dream it's not at all hard to manipulate your environment in any way shape or form. You don't need to spend decades unlearning your Ego or anything like that. When we are on psychedelics it's similar - the magic just happens. However in this so called "ordinary" state of mind nothing happens and no one ever anywhere seems to be able to do anything like that. So I am little doubtful that those are the exact mechanics of how reality works. But hey if it's true it's true, Leo please change something of epic proportions with your imagination then it will be obvious this is indeed the case and the whole world will want to become spiritual.

I am not sure how to let go or what letting go is at all. I've been taught to surrender many times but I don't know how.

Not necessarily a teaching but understanding and not of everything (e.g. I don't care about makeup) but rather of that which is beyond the world of duality and oneness (for example Tao). My greatest dream is not so much to accumulate stuff in life and experience pleasures (although I surely don't mind living a wonderful and fulfilling life even if it's an illusion) but rather to wake up from the dream and uncover something that is real and doesn't change. Something that is the fulcrum of everything else, the source, the Tao, Tathagatha, beyond coming and going etc. I can't be satisfied with just looking at how wonderful the birds and trees are and pretending I am omniscient. I want to uncover what is going on, why am I here, where I came from, how creation works, what other dimensions are there and I want to know with 100% certainty that it's the truth, not just some other simulation, matrix, dream, confusion, deeper level of illusion etc. I want clarity. Well I guess I am wondering if everyone has the chance to wake up within their lifetime or not. I don't get that. I've heard it before from many teachings but I've never been aware of any unconditional love in the relative. After all if it's unconditional it means it isn't relative either which means it can't be experience within the relativity. Also doesn't unconditional love mean that you should love the jihadists, torturers who skin people alive, nazis, dictators, the people who caused the incident at Chernobyl and etc. (insert other horrible scenarios). I think he liked to scare his students that unless they create their soul they will be lost forever in order to motivate them a little bit. Also the way I interpret it is that ignorance is bliss, enlightenment is bliss, but moving from ignorance to enlightenment is hell. I would like to be able to progress on the spiritual path more effortlessly, without so much friction and confusion wasting 10 years on one thought etc. The Buddha was complete at 35, I am not saying this to compare high scores, I just wish that there is a way to improve the efficiency of the spiritual process.

Well if there's no certainty, then how do you define Truth? What is real? It does seem possible that I am recreating it, but isn't this because there is some unresolved issue, like a festering wound that needs healing? What is the value of recreating these pains? I feel like I have an inherent need to find out what is going on, that I was born with, and that there are no answers anywhere, and this is driving me crazy... I went to India a couple years ago to seek some answers from a master, but I found the teaching incomplete. It was intended to show that THIS is the nature of reality (THIS being the experience of awareness) and while this was helpful I don't consider this any sort of enlightenment (even though many do) because it doesn't explain anything it just provides a sanctuary from Ego. How does one do this? Are you saying that it's only possible for certain generations to become enlightened? E.g. early hominids could not wake up? What about all of the sages, buddhas etc who lived during times of much turmoil and hardship etc. What is IT that allows us to trust spirit/intuition/sensation is it simply a choice that we make because we are to tired to suffer thinking or is there some light that is shining that dispels confusion and uncertainty and that you can rely upon to guide you in life? I watched a video from Sadhguru in which he explained that it's important to start with the realization that what you don't know you don't know and go back to your own experience which made a lot of sense. But then I was reading the crazy vajrayana buddhism stuff where they say that your six senses (the sixth one being the intellect) cannot be trusted at all and that life is not real and cannot show you who you are (and I became confused again). Thank you for the encouraging words. Gurdjieff once said: "Blessed is he who has a soul, blessed is he who has none, but woe and grief to him who has it in embryo."

Sometimes super negative thoughts arise in my mind for no reason. For example I would see a person on the street and a thought would arise of that person breaking their leg horribly or dying in a car accident. I don't hate these people at all nor do I dislike them for any reason so I can't explain where these thoughts are coming from. They just pop in my head as images so I really hope that thoughts aren't harmful to other people. Even if they aren't it's still bizzarre. In Tibetan lore there are demons who like to do such things and play with people. Sometimes it happens even when I am with people I really like - friends or family. I look at them and a thought of them getting cancer or other horrible disease arises. It's not a wish or anything like that just series of mental images which disgust even me. I've had this problem for some years now. Can't explain it. Feels like it's coming from the subconscious. I would really like to clear this negative energy from my system. Maybe I should try hypnosis or something like that. Any ideas?

I saw the video and I liked it. I will integrate this technique in my daily regimen, starting today. The way I understand this - it's some sort of brain fasting. In other words you stop using it so all the bullshit can be unloaded and clarity can be restored. I am not sure when I started having those. I did have an experience related to death - I saw a person die in a bathroom and it was rather ugly. I am not sure if I had the thoughts before. I have cut myself once and I was in a hospital for a few days, but it was not too gory. Oh, wait - As a kid I had a rather gory experience - I was playing in the bathtub and tried to stand on one of the porcelain shampoo holders for some reason (almost got a darwin award for that). Obviously the holder couldn't hold my weight, because it's designed for shampoos, not people, so it broke and some of the parts stabbed my back and my hand, and since the bathtub was full of hot water, blood got everywhere and it looked like a bathtub full of blood. There was some blood outside of the bathtub too. Maybe that's it I am not sure... Usually when my mood is down, my brain tends to default to imagining the worst things happening. When I am happier I "forget" to think the worse. Not always though, sometimes when I am happy they occur also, but much less often and I usually dismiss the quickly. In fact I have noticed a very weird brain response from myself - when things start going well in my life, my brain starts saying "soon it will be shit again, it will be suffering again." and I start getting the horrible images again. It's as if I won't allow myself to be free from it, like it's some law of physics.

What is the do nothing meditation? Is it sitting and spacing out?

So I decided to smoke a fattie today and I went on the balcony and stayed there for a while. And as I was watching the birds and the trees, suddenly I felt like a little boy again. Like that first day of your first summer vacation. I felt like as if problems couldn't exist. No past, no future, no vision, no struggling, no suffering, no fighting, no resistance, just pure life - fresh and transparent. And as I reflected on my life from that point of view, I realized how much rubbish we accumulate as we grow up. I felt like modern living is to liberation what the standard American diet (SAD) is to health. Which is quite obvious of course. No revelations here... And yet to experience the awareness of this fact is much more satisfying than simply rationalizing from observation. This seems to trigger a feeling of what I can only describe as appreciation. I thought about the Buddha describing the Tathagata, which is indestructible and eternally happy and so I wondered if what he's describing is in any way related to the way happiness felt to me when I was a kid. So... for a brief moment today, this happiness occurred, and I felt like sharing.

When you are accepting your death, what you are really accepting is some belief of what death is. I have seen a person die and I still have no idea what it is because I have no conscious information about it so there's nothing to accept or reject about it. If you are trying to reject it there's a problem of resistance, if you are trying to accept it there's a problem with beliefs. Thus neither reject it, nor accept it. As for suicide - it's really born out of belief. In India people don't like to commit suicide because they believe in reincarnation and feel that it will solve nothing. In the western world we believe that suicide will solve it all so we like to commit suicide when things get really tough. What if suicide makes it even worse? Get stuck is some hell dimension? LOL! I have considered suicide many times in the past so I can relate. Sometimes life can feel so dark and desperate or maybe you might have a tough mental or physical illness that turns you into a fucking vegetable and you just want to end it. As you realize that you will never reach all of your dreams and hopes the ego starts to suffer immensely, but don't run away from this feeling. Jed McKenna said "Your moments of blackest despair are really your most honest moments, your most lucid moments...". Why do you think that is? Because then you realize that your dreams and hopes are actually irrelevant. In fact they were always irrelevant - stuff born out of your beliefs. Tilopa said: "Investment in samsara is futile; it is the cause of every anxiety. Since worldly involvement is pointless, seek the heart of reality!" The real suicide is waking up, not killing your physical body. The price of waking up is everything. Let it all go - life, death, certainty, uncertainty, beliefs, knowledge, religion, hopes, dreams, fears, doubts, opinions, memories, esteem, aspirations, motivations, expectations, goals, enlightenment, non-enlightenment, meaning, meaninglessness, luck, fate, faith, destiny, identity, normalcy, craziness, fairness, unfairness, confusion, clarity, frustration, strategy, time, space, tactic, plot, cause, effect etc. (fill in the rest with whatever you identify with). See... All of the dream is nothing, it's empty. It doesn't mean anything. Let your beliefs go and with your beliefs you will go as well. Completely surrender. Even the process of surrendering you should surrender. It's not to go somewhere or to become a god. It's to disappear. If you can disappear then why not try it? That's probably the most interesting thing to try period. "Without the past, there would be nothing to think about, let alone someone to think it." - From the TV show Sens8 Tilopa said: "A tree spreads its branches and puts forth leaves, But when its root is cut its foliage withers; So too, when the root of the mind is severed, The branches of the tree of samsara die"

@Buba Did you notice what happened? Everyone in this thread has their own perspective of enlightenment and is replying according to their beliefs about what enlightenment is. From what I can see - most people here seem to equate enlightenment with Jed McKenna's idea of enlightenment or in other words "truth realization". Some "chop wood, carry water" thing. The way the Buddha described it - it goes much further than that. MUCH MUCH further. Did the Buddha or Tilopa had to chop wood and carry water? Did the Tathagata say that there's no self, or did he say that there's an eternal self that is indestructible like a diamond? Now, whether any of it it is true is irrelevant. The point is that you shouldn't chase after enlightenment because what you are really doing this way is going after someone's idea or description of it, which cannot be the real thing. A belief will never get you to the end. Finally, regarding your question: If enlightenment is our true nature, then we've always had it, like ALWAYS. With that said why are we in the situation to have to remember our home? Did we lose it? If we can lose it once, can't we lose it again? Who knows? You can always come up with some weird question like - "What if enlightenment is just part of a computer simulation and we are test rats?". No point in trying to overreach with your intellect. Time to go further than asking questions. The intellect is only useful to let go of the intellect. Keep going further.

@jse So basically you are saying - pain is like the red lamp on the car's dashboard, just an indication that something is wrong and we need to make the change. Sounds reasonable, but my understanding is that in most situations we have no idea how to fix what's wrong and this pain continues for too long and becomes the whole story. I've noticed how after a few really bad days I feel like life sucks and it can't ever be good, and how after a few great days I feel like life's really great and I should be appreciative and the bad isn't really that bad. So obviously both perspectives are equally false, however in this universe it's much easier to be in pain than not to be in pain. Consider sitting on your chair - after a while you will have to move your ass or it will start hurting, now you have to move around which after a while gets painful too so you have to rest again because you are tired. Consider survival - you can't just stop eating you will be in pain in a day or so and since food isn't guaranteed you have pain. You have chronic diseases which no one really knows how to fix (so what if you know that something is wrong?). @Shin Sounds like a speculation.

Greetings, This is my first post on the forum and I want to make it count. I have been on the spiritual path for as long as I can remember. Ever since I was a little kid I felt a calling towards the mystical. But there is something wrong with me… I noticed I was different when my mom signed me up for kindergarten for the first time. As her cab left for work I just couldn’t handle it. Nothing really happened on the outside but on the inside I was falling apart and I wasn’t sure why. I couldn’t speak to anyone at the kindergarten and I just cried myself to sleep every day. This happened every day until eventually my mom realized I wasn’t doing so well there and she removed me from kindergarten... The painful me-story I come from a dysfunctional and a chaotic family – My parents were divorced before I was born. Although I saw some screaming and fighting it definitely was not the worst story out there. I wasn’t abused or anything like that, however I realized that adults didn’t know what they were doing either and this confused me a lot and made me somewhat unstable. I didn’t see my father a lot - just a couple of times and then he died somewhere in Asia from unknown causes. My mother married another guy who was a decent fellow and I was brought up in that family. He died too (in front of me). For a while I became somewhat stable. I didn’t have too much problems in primary school but I reverted to deep depression in late high school again. The kind of depression where you wake up in the morning and just start crying after realizing you are still alive. I started doing drugs. Didn’t have friends so I didn’t have access to popular drugs but I did stuff which an unscrupulous pharmacist was willing to sell me. I was taking recreational drugs by myself in my room. I had my first panic attack during one of my first trips, thought I was dying. I called 911, but when the lady said “Hello” I hanged up. The thought of my mother finding out overwhelmed me. I thought I would take the risk and wait it out instead – if I die then so the fuck what? I didn’t die that day and it actually felt really good to disrespect death – I felt liberated. I felt like a god. I thought I could get away with anything, so I shifted from depressive to manic reckless behavior. Went to the gym, started taking steroids and all kinds of other substances. Quit after a few months since I ruined my digestion with a bizarre diet which my idiot trainer recommended. I did get huge stretch marks from all the water retention though. I went to depressed again and started taking mushrooms from time to time. I had a horrible trip which lead to a brutal panic attack and this time it was so bad that I couldn’t contain my fear and went to the ER. They kept me in the hospital for three days and my mom found out I was doing drugs, steroids and all that. Since that day I have been becoming more and more neurotic. Nowadays I have terrible social skills. I have never had sex. I have never had a real relationship. I am so neurotic that I have turned away girls who themselves offered to date me and who I wanted to date as well. I’ve had many offers from girls but I always turn them down, because deep down I feel that I am not good enough. I feel that because I haven’t had any sexual experience I will disappoint them and I don’t want to experience the shame from this situation. I know that because I have never kissed a girl in my life I don’t know how to kiss so I will disappoint. I feel that I am not ready to be in a relationship. I feel like I’m a product that’s not ready for market. We are talking pathological levels of insecurity here. I am sometimes afraid to say “Hi” to people - when they are about to look at me, I avert my gaze to avoid eye contact. I am so afraid of rejection that I sabotage my whole social life. That’s why I have spent most of my life in my room, in the dark, alone. I talk to myself because I have no one else to talk to. I have wondered whether I am autistic or something like that. I am so neurotic that my brain likes to generate horror thoughts all the time. Sometimes when I walk on the street and see an open hole I instantly imagine how I didn’t notice it and I stepped in and my foot broke in the worst possible way. When someone calls on the phone my initial reaction is to assume that they are about to tell me that someone has gone crazy or has died. I always assume the worst – I am not doing it on purpose it’s just the result of years of pain, suffering, loneliness and negativity. It’s probably programmed in my subconscious. But wait there’s more... At some point the health problems begun. All kinds of weird stuff – allergies, asthma, digestive issues, unexplained bruising and scratches on skin, insomnia, vertigo, headaches, fatigue. I read every wikipedia article about every symptom, I read hundreds of health and diet books, I’ve tried hundreds of supplements, I’ve spent thousands of dollars on blood tests. I am practically an expert on health and nutrition at this point, only I am not, because all of those diets (paleo, gaps, fodmap, autoimmune paleo etc.) and supplements, and gluten/sugar avoidance and all kinds of modifications which seem to solve other people’s health issues and result in success-transformation stories have done nothing or very little for me. I’ve been to so many doctors – some of them have plain stated they have no idea what’s wrong with me. When I had my health meltdown everyone was either telling me that I am fine or that I need psychiatric help (didn’t know that skin bruising or copper deficiency or abnormal TSH levels were treated by psychiatrists) or that there’s something wrong but they are not sure what. I am starting to think that my health problems are caused by something else entirely. Maybe my deep negativity is destroying my body. Maybe there’s bad feng shui in my room. Maybe my sexlessness is ruining my energies. Maybe holding my sperm when I ejaculate is actually harmful (I read that in a Mantak Chia book, but the author later said that this was actually bad advice, I don’t know why I am still doing that). Maybe it’s just fucking karma and I have to accept my nightmare and wait it out... Let me just say that maintaining my sanity is becoming harder every day. I’ve considered suicide many times. I know it would destroy my mother and I just can’t do that to her. Who wants to play “am I tired of this shit”. My spiritual journey My deep suffering forced me to seek relief in spirituality. I have never had a teacher or a guru, but I did found a person on a forum who mentored me for a while and taught me to let go of beliefs and to seek free thinking and authenticity. I also read some Jed McKenna, some Chogyam Trungpa, some Osho, some Sam Harris, some U.G. Krishnamurti (the most depressing shit ever), some Buddha, some Lao Tzu, some Eckhart Tolle. Listened to thousands of hours of video from spiritual masters. I even went to India for a “radical” satsang. Don’t say I am not committed. I am committed AF. After a while this shedding of beliefs started to suffocate me because I realized that everything is a belief and everything can be questioned. I realized that every concept is just someone’s opinion or perception. If you think about it even the notion of truth is questionable. People say that truth is just the way things are, but that’s based on the belief that logic is meaningful. Maybe there is no “the way things are” - it doesn’t make sense, but then it doesn’t have to make sense, just because I want it to make sense. You know I hear all these teachers making big claims such as “consciousness is real and eternal”, “there is no death”, “there is no self”, “there is a self”, “jesus was enlightened”, “buddha was enlightened”, “tao is union of the opposites”, “tao is not the union of opposites” - doesn’t it seem to you that all of this is BS? I mean how do you really confirm that your consciousness is real and eternal? What if all of this is just some simulation and these insights are worthless or even worse - force-fed as a part of an experiment (remember the Matrix)? What if I am just a brain in a vat? What if existence collapses after a second and we get stuck in blackness for eternity? I get it – most or all of these scenarios are just brain generated fiction. The intellect desperately tries to fill the void of uncertainty with some story, but sooner or later I will have to let go of the idea of certainty as well. So what’s left? More beliefs? More neurosis? Is the goal simply to be peaceful regardless of circumstances (Eckhart Tolle)? Sounds good but what if I become a schizophrenic and lose control over my peace too? Start hearing voices that tell me to eat brains? My uncle just became a schizophrenic a few days ago and he’s already tried to commit suicide. I’ve known and loved this person for decades and suddenly he’s all fucked up talking about conspiracies against our family reputation. How do you make sense of this, how do you accept and integrate this? What the fuck is going on? Anyway... Don’t get me wrong. I’ve learned a lot too. I am super stubborn and I tend to play the victim card a bit too often, but I am actually quite open-minded as well. I don’t claim wrong or right, although I prefer ease over dis-ease. I am becoming too lazy to suffer. I am still afraid of losing my mind, but there is some peace in not taking myself too seriously. Definitely not heaven, more like giving up, but still better than crying myself to sleep (insomnia). I want peace. I want clarity. I want effortless existence. I want to live in the mountains and play my dizi flute. That’s pretty much it. Not sure what to do. Nothing at all to hold on to. I would love to hear back from you. Don’t need consolation, need a way out. All of your advice is welcome and appreciated.

So what's the point of pain if it doesn't matter?

Are you talking about "mind over matter"?

Hmm, that sounds interesting. You may be on to something valuable. I think we identify with our painful thoughts because we are able to feel our pains while we aren't able to feel other people's pains so clearly and therefore it's very hard for us to conclude that our pains are just as irrelevant as those of the rest of the people. It doesn't feel right, it feels like some sort of escapism.

@jse If that was the case, then why do people cry when watching sad movies about other people?

@Shin Osho once said - "Madness is not really losing your mind, it is instead getting lost in your mind." Is that what you mean? Shin you told me a few days ago that "I just had a sad past" and that has had a profound impact on me. As I am saying this "I just had a sad past." it suddenly removes all the weight from my story. The attachment to the painful me story dissolves into thin air like the morning mist. Where there was a feeling of darkness and despair now there's a feeling of lightness and freshness. Eternal gratitude. @Nahm I will watch this movie. I literally love the buddha, I cry every time when I hear or read his story. Truth or fiction it doesn't matter to me. It just touches me so deeply that it produces a certain state of appreciation/ecstasy.

It has been suggested by some that Clear Light is observable through the pineal gland during the practice of the Yoga of Clear Light (ösel). Has anyone experienced anything like that?

Naropa claimed that learning to recognize Clear Light is the most important thing. He even invented the Yoga of Clear Light. It has been suggested that Clear Light cannot be comprehended through the 6 senses, but through uncovering the meta-senses. What is Clear Light? If it's the most important thing isn't it prudent to get there as soon as possible?