The Don

Yes. I can how "nihilism" is a story that I'm creating. Thank you for reminding me that.

Yes. I see that if I'm considering nihilism to be of no use, I'm getting better. Right now I'm OK. Last night I wasn't. Last night, just before the bed, I was lost in a wave of depression and I was thinking about how to get out of that wave. I tried to embrace the depression and it didn't work for a while. I was still depressed. Then I started to focus on my breath and I got better; I was using a technique described in this video. It really worked. Today, I just finished a meditation session and I feel like I'm getting better. Maybe these mood swings will come back but I really don't care. I'm practicing how to get out of them and in the future, I'll find a way to consider nihilism of no use in a logical manner. Maybe Stoicism is helping me. I need to read more of the Stoics. I was an idealist all my life. I wanted the world to get better and I wanted people to live consciously, in the sense that they had to have a family for maintaining Western Civilization and all that's good in society (medicine, science, technology, automotive, etc.). I was bothered by the thoughts of people having fewer and fewer relationships; I was bothered by the fact that Western Civilization is imploding because people refuse to get married and have more kids. So yeah, I was an idealist. I think I'm not anymore. I need to embrace reality as it is and be a good person. A person that has the will to help others.

I must admit I'm scared of this too. But the only thing I can do is to let it be as it is without getting attached to it. I must be OK with whatever pops out into my mind. This video is very interesting: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KxUPSRgLIGE

Alright. I'll focus on love, truth, compassion and the present moment. Moreover, I would like to know what @Leo Gura thinks about nihilism and what can people do to escape from it; he definitely has been nihilistic and found his own way to escape from it.

Well, thank you! How about starting a family and having kids?

Okay. I understand. So I should drop the concept of meaning and meaninglessness. I'm creating the struggle, right?

Thank you. I'm really grateful for your words. This is a great insight for me. Wow, this is also a great insight. I'll come back here and read it again. Alright then. I won't associate meaning with the meaninglessness of the world. Sorry to hear that but I'm glad you got over it. Family is a great value. What's confusing is the fact that right now I'm OK but tomorrow I won't be OK. I'm experiencing lots of mood swings.

First of all, thank you for advising me. I'm really grateful for your words. I'm doing exactly what you just said; not taking thoughts seriously. I was at work today and had some thoughts about the meaninglessness of life. I constantly tried to ascribe meaning to life but I couldn't. I had thoughts like "even if I overcome this awful state of depression I'll still be demotivated for life" or "after I'll get over this sh*tty depression, I won't be satisfied by self-actualization work or reading books because life is meaningless so doing the work is in vain". Reading books and self-actualization kept me happy until I reached this point where they don't motivate me anymore. It's so frustrating. I'm also confused right now but I'll do my best to get through this.

I can live without having the right perspective of sanity or how you'd wanna call it. The problem is demotivation for life. That's what I wanna overcome. Sure. I'll take a look at Eckhart Tolle's talks and videos.

Hello. Yesterday I was hit by a shockwave of depression. It came out of nowhere. At the moment I'm OK and I just don't want the depression to come back. I'm really scared because I don't want to experience my life being depressed. The feeling of depression is so unpleasant and discouraging... I don't have words to describe it. Why is this happening to me as I'm becoming a very good meditator? I'm mindful most of the time and sometimes I can stay in the present moment for hours, without having a single thought. Meditation is making me more conscious which is why I shouldn't get depressed! On the other hand, as I'm realizing God and finding out what reality is, life becomes meaningless. Sometimes I'm scared of the fact that God is eternal. It's so confusing. I just want to have a normal life, without depression.

@Nahm , thank you. I'll do my best to keep going.

Moreover, even if I'm trying intentionally to get my mind to wander, it doesn't work. My psyche is pulling me back in a conscious (mindful) state; effortlessly. When I notice this I'm having this though: "Holy f-cking sh...". It's unbelievable. Only if I knew how to keep depression away...

@Proactive , thank you. Sometimes I'm blown away by my capacity to stay in the present moment. I can be conscious for longer periods of time without having thoughts; effortlessly. Something popped in my own psyche. Something clicked in my mind. I'm feeling different as meditation changed my way of thinking and how I see the world. It's bizzare and beautiful at the same time. I forced myself to reach this point where I can meditate properly, without thoughts. It was painful but if you keep doing it (meditating with consciousness), it will transform you to the point where you can be conscious and mindful all the time. The problem is this: if I keep doing it I'm becoming depressed. I wish I knew how to avoid depression but it seems that it won't work. I'm not well.

Yes, Trump is doing that. Proof: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n1Notlc9s7U

@Leo Gura, with all due respect, Trump has done nothing wrong. And mark my words: Trump will never be removed from office as he's going to be reelected. Trump is not a problem. The left is. Please remember this article: https://www.wnd.com/2019/01/democrats-and-the-dark-art-of-projection/ On the other hand, we live in America which is a free society. It really is free. You can do whatever you want. Western Civilization gave us human rights and Trump is fighting for that; for your human rights and freedoms. If Trump would be a problem, you couldn't speak freely. So please! Enough with this rage against Trump. Everyone should take full responsibility for their own lives. As long as your God-given rights are protected, you shouldn't worry about the man in the White House.

Hello. After 18 months of self-actualization which includes meditation on a daily basis, reading, writing, mindfulness and so forth, I still have a deep inner resistance when it comes to studying and trying to memorize facts. What I find strange is the fact that I can meditate pretty well and I can stay in the present moment for a long time without resistance. I have to admit that it was hard to reach this point where I can meditate everywhere, even at my work which is a pretty randy place. What bothers me is the feeling that I'll never be able to achieve a pleasant state (meaning a state of flow) when I'm studying the things that seem interesting to me. I want to be able to enjoy studying without resistance because it's very important for me to be a life-long learner. How can I become a good communicator if I'm not able to process and assimilate information very well? How many of you do have this inner resistance when studying? How many of you lack motivation when it comes to learning new stuff? I'm almost at a point of desperation and I mean that. Any suggestions to achieve a state of flow when I need to learn new information?

I agree with you @Leo Gura. Meditation is very difficult in the beginning. If you practice meditation the right way and make an effort to keep your mind in the present moment, eventually the hardness of meditation will subside. I promise you that. Anyway, this will happen after a year of meditation. You can't get the benefits of meditation in the first months. You have to meditate on a daily basis until you find yourself in a position where you can be present without having your mind wandering. I'm able to keep myself in the present moment and be conscious at the same time with little or no effort at all. It's an amazing experience as I'm feeling my brain rewiring itself for the better. Sometimes I'm asking myself what will happen when I'll be able to be present all the time and experiencing reality without thoughts and just a pure, lucid mind. The good news is that I'm heading towards that experience. I wish you luck.

Thank you @Leo Gura. I'm so glad that you've responded to my uncertainty. I will get rid of all my "shoulds" when it comes to learning. I can identify the fact that I push myself all the time to memorize facts as I'm telling myself that it's very important to memorize all that I read. When I fail to do that, which happens, I become discouraged. Of course, this is bad. I can also identify the fact that I'm a very fast learner in the sense that I don't stop and contemplate a paragraph or a phrase. It's all going very fast. So yeah, this is bad as well. I always tell myself that I need to read the whole book in a certain amount of time which is, of course, bad. All of these mechanical rules must be identified and I'm pretty sure I have more awful rules but I'm at a point where I'm doing my best to identify them. Thank you for opening my mind to all those facts. Maybe an episode on YouTube related to learning in a less structured way would be useful to people.

Not too often. I like watching @Leo Gura's videos on YouTube instead of playing video games. I watch a lot of them.

Only Piracetam but I don't know if it's safe in the long run... Piracetam works but I don't want the side effects of it.

Nonetheless, I've been watching some videos about mindfulness and the suggestions were that mindfulness can solve any problem. I don't believe it's that easy. That's why it's important for anyone to know how to separate bad and good information.

On the other hand, I find many topics interesting and I'm very happy to discuss them with my friends. I'm getting excited when I stumble upon something new like Psychedelics, nutrition, spirituality and so forth but when I become conscious of the fact that it's necessary to study a subject more and for a longer period of time, the feeling of resistance kicks in and the process of studying becomes frustrating. It's so annoying. Do I have an emotional problem that it's hard for me to identify? I'm asking because I suspect that I have an emotional problem that I need to solve but identifying it seems hard. Or maybe I need to reprogram my subconscious mind but I'm not sure of it since I don't know to identify my problem. This is a challenge for me and I'm willing to do anything to overcome it.

Hello. This is a spiritual topic and it might be very interesting if we get to the bottom of it. I've watched this video about dying which is very interesting and captivating at the same time. It made me think about death. I can say that I think of death on a daily basis. Memento mori is one of my favorite mottos. Anyway, what do you guys think about death? What happens after we die? What comes next? Is there a similar state like experiencing 5-MeO-DMT after we're clinically dead? Is it pure consciousness or deep dreamless sleep after we end up dead?

I recommend this interview: It is very captivating.

Even if there's no 'Don', there's the body of Don or at least, there is a body. That body will cease to exist. The body doesn't want to die. The body wants to be able to think, move, eat and so forth. Basically, the body wants to survive. When the body is gone, what remains? And if it remains something like consciousness, that consciousness doesn't operate like a mind. That consciousness doesn't have awareness as the body does.