Carl-Richard

It's the other way around. If you're scared that you will lose it, you'll never get it.

The most consistent fact about experience is that it always is and that it always changes.

I'll vouch for that suggestion.

LOL

@Forestluv Déjà vu hahahaha

and also don't forget that just because you're entertaining that idea, it doesn't make you immune to various self-deception mechanisms . Ideas are much more sticky than they might seem from your perspective. I learned that one the hard way.

@Origins A little wordy, but alright. I'm sorry if I offended you.

You should be able to spread your wings but also flap them around.

That pretty much sums it up.

Have you totally lost the plot?: Please go ahead and define these terms. I shouldn't have to repeat myself like this.

Witness the definition of structure without content. Are you actually going to give some definitions soon or are you just going to keep talking about doing it?

Yes, it does sound nice on paper. But get this: transcending your mind is nothing short of losing your mind

What is even more scary is being alone without your thoughts.

How so?

But you're not saying anything!

Because you're essentially trying to get through your day while constantly getting bombarded by intrusive thoughts about staying aware. There is nothing spiritual about it.

I call it neurosis, but yeah, once you are able to let go, the momentum you've built up can catapult you into an awakening. By the way, just to clarify: when I say I stopped smoking cannabis for a week, I meant that I was sober (or in withdrawal rather) during my awakening, not that I was resetting my tolerance in order to get really high. Infact, I stopped smoking for a month after that. Now it's been 2-3 years since I've smoked.

How... am I that psychic??

I stopped smoking weed for a week. I was smoking more cannabis in a day than you should probably ever smoke. Apparently, cannabis withdrawal has an interesting effect on attention. It also probably helped that I spent that week prior being totally obsessed about "staying aware".

I had an awakening on my 3rd ever meditation and I thought I was going to disappear forever.

Not only that, but I have a tiny suspicion that we might be talking about a very specific form of clouding here...

Annihilation. It's the most accurate representation of a bad trip that I've ever come across. I literally have PTSD from some of the scenes.

Yes please give a concrete definition of these otherwise extremely relative terms. Something tells me that is not going to happen... but sure, I'm not going to stop you.

But I'm seriously saying that you didn't say anything about what capacity means, or what you mean by integration, or the distinction between "this environment" and "any environment". I just didn't expect to read this amount of text without taking anything away from it.

If I have to be completely honest, you didn't actually say anything.