Carl-Richard

Any side effects?

Does your autocorrect on your phone have an ego or think for itself? Does Google think for itself? That is essentially what you're saying.

I've noticed a weird phenomena that I think most people can relate to in some way. So we all probably have experienced something like this: you watch a YouTube video and you have the thought "ah, I should show this to this person". Then as you keep watching the video, you start taking the perspective of the person you were thinking about and trying to understand the video as if you were them. If this is say your little brother, your understanding is probably contracted and limited down to some point, and you will be watching the video from that contracted level of understanding until you snap out of it, because you don't have the processing capacity to watch the video simultaenously from both perspectives (your own level of understanding and his level of understanding). So, I've noticed something similar happen when I took a statistics class in university, and it was very annoying, because it was of course interfering with my ability to learn. Here is how it usually worked: some student would ask a question about something they didn't understand in the lecture, and I would tune in to that level of understanding and sort of construct their perspective based on the question and how much I knew about this person from before, etc., and then I would keep watching the lecture from that contracted perspective for no reason, and I would have to consciously snap myself out of it to return to my own level of understanding. This is very annoying, and I can't really control when it happens. The worst part is that I don't even need any concrete external cues to get into that contracted mode of understanding, because I used to have this belief like many people have that "math is difficult, I don't understand math", and it's like I can sometimes connect to this mental archetype spontaneously during a lecture and it will interfere with my understanding in a similar way. Said more simply, I can sometimes have intrusive thoughts that destroys my confidence and puts me in a bad mental frame Other times, it's just a general vibe I will pick up on, an infectious cloud of incompetence floating across the room. Anyways, I also see connections with this and the autism-psychosis spectrum (see my previous thread). As a person "on the spectrum" (the psychotic end), If you're very used to creating elaborate mental frames based on subtle cues, that is what mentalizing is, that is what conspiratorial thinking is, what paranoid persecutory delusions are, what perspective-taking is, hence "compulsive perspective-taking syndrome"

I guess that is one aspect of psychotics or artists: their identity is fluid and constantly changing. I had severe problems figuring out what I wanted to "be" in life. Took me a while to even get a clue. I guess this is what actors feel when they lose themselves in a role. Bryan Cranston and Heisenberg? He said it changed him. Heath Ledger and The Joker? No need to say anything. Jim Carrey said that Jim Carrey was his best role

It doesn't happen very often. It's like a mode I can get into. Have you seriously never done that though (watching a YouTube video from somebody else's perspective)? It has to be something decently intellectually challenging, like one of Leo's videos, and preferably a person you know pretty well. In fact, I remember watching almost the entire video on SD stage purple once from my little brother's perspective (he said he listened to it at work once, and I wanted to see how he would've experienced it).

@Thought Art The thread is 1.5 years old. There is a reason why there is a message discouraging you to revive old threads. I lock old threads that display a significant lack of continuity and are not recurring threads or mega-threads. Some examples of discontinuity are when a large chunk of the posters are inactive members, or the posts contain information about real life events that are outdated. Quoting inactive members or echoing outdated information creates unnecessary clutter and confusion. I can start asking people to start a new thread when I lock it.

MDMA is very unique. You will struggle to find synthetic alternatives, let alone natural ones.

Nothing beats the feeling of smashing out a heavy set at the gym. Plus there are usually saunas there and free soap There are limitations to bodyweight exercises. There is a difference between doing 30 reps of push-ups and 6-12 reps of a bench press for example. The more reps you do per set, the more it turns into an endurance exercise and less a strength/muscle-building exercise. Endurance training is quite systemically taxing, and it causes a different physiological response than maximizing the recruitment of muscle fibers, and frankly, I generally prefer the latter over the former by how it makes me feel. It's probably because heavy weight training increases testosterone levels while heavy endurance training increases cortisol levels (which is inversely associated with testosterone levels). Some people prefer endurance training though, so you have to find what you like. You can go very far without a gym membership if you're smart and use things that are available (like this clay pebble brick thing I found at our family cabin), but the gym is both more optimal and more convenient for achieving the best results when it comes to strength/muscle training. Besides, gym girls

My lowest point was probably when I dressed up as Heisenberg at a Halloween party and drank so much vodka that I couldn't stand upright. I fell over the railing halfway down a set of stairs and luckily only bruised my back. The cops were called because of noise complaints (there were like 50 people in a 4-story apartment). My friends ordered a taxi for me while I was laying on the ground, threw me inside and basically teleported me to my house. I kept saying the wrong address, and I had to pay the equivalent of 300$ the day after for puking in the taxi. I wasn't able to enter the pin to pay the taxi driver, and I emptied all the contents of my wallet all across the neighborhood. I wasn't able to enter the code for the front door, so I banged on the door and screamed like some cave troll until one of my roommates opened up. My brain was completely wrecked for the whole week after that. Literally the day after, we were dissecting pig intestines in some laboratory class in university. It was truly disgusting and I was definitely the useless member of the group. I probably lost a few brain cells that night.

One of the three. There was the needle phase, then the abyss phase, then the serene phase. Interesting. Seems to map on pretty well: contractions causing poking sensations, moving down the birth canal feeling like entering the abyss with organ-like structures, and being born feeling like coming out into the light

Because the ego is not in control.

Lol. Who knows? My dad knew a shaman once. It was so oddly specific: three phases with different types of pain, progressing in the same order every time. I wonder what a dream specialist would say about it. I also had a very significant awe experience that is imprinted into my memory. I was watching the stars when I was maybe 3-4 years old, and it was like I became the night sky and traveled among the stars. It's a really faint memory, but at the same time rich, and sometimes I can connect to that same headspace. I don't remember if it was a spatial-temporal out-of-body experience, or a vision in my imagination, or an expanded sense of perception.

Hallucinations are more common in the transition between waking and sleep. As for the nightmares I had in childhood, they were otherworldly, contradictory and demonic, but still they had a structure to them. I would dream that I was an infinitely thin needle that was stretched infinitely far in both directions, for some reason in my living room suspended in mid-air together with other needles, feeling the sensations of being poked by these needles; pure horror and agony. Then, the dream would progress to a dark underground world of what I can only describe as infinitely large, meaty and organ-like round structures, and they were kind of fractal in nature, like one of those Mandelbrot set zooms. They were infinitely heavy, and it felt like I was being squeezed and choked by the pressure of these things on top of me. I would need to become a painter to really describe these things. Then, the dream would progress to a peaceful and serene bright space without any defined boundaries with a tiny translucent chair sitting next to a single translucent wall with a window in it, with a wind gently blowing amidst white angelic curtains. I would have a sort of dissociated calm-after-the-storm feeling, sort of numb and shook by the previous parts of the dream, but it was very calming. At the same time, I would sometimes be struck by a supreme feeling of wrongness, that everything was upside down but still acting like gravity was holding things in place. This dream would repeat many times during my childhood.

This video is a good example of being on the more psychotic side of the spectrum: hyper-social, witty, conspiratorial and a bit weird. I see myself so much in John Zherka when he starts talking about the weirdest things and everybody else is like "oh cmon, stop".

There exists a very reliable test for autism created by Simon Baron-Cohen, the cousin of none other than Sasha Baron-Cohen (creator of Borat). It involves reading people's emotions by only looking at their eyes. Reading the mind in the eyes test: https://s3.amazonaws.com/he-assets-prod/interactives/233_reading_the_mind_through_eyes/Launch.html My score was surprisingly high (34/36), meaning I can read emotions pretty well. This only adds evidence to the idea that autism exists on a spectrum with psychosis, as I would generally place myself on the more psychotic side of that spectrum. According to this theory, psychosis is associated with picking up social cues and making abstract inferences based on those (which is required for reading emotions and understanding what other people are thinking, a.k.a. "mentalizing"). Psychosis can be thought of as when these mechanisms go into hyper-drive and you become very paranoid about every slightest detail and spin grand narratives and conspiracy theories out of thin air ("she looked at me weird -> she is working for the government -> they're coming for me"). Meanwhile, an autistic person will need very concrete information to make any sort of conclusion, which might keep them more grounded in some ways, but which might also hinder social interactions. So there are pros and cons for both. Regardless, we're all unique individuals

Alan Touring was an alien? ?

Heaviest classical piece performed on electric guitar.

Mmm, Fi and Te

What about the meta-worldview of holism? You need to integrate all sides and become whole

"He is playing a character, guys" ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Getting nazi vibes (not because you're German ?). If you can write in English, you're Western enough to stay here It's good that you're progressing on integrating your inner Satan, but you need to keep it under control sometimes

Leo is a Westerner, his content is Western, his forum sections are Western, etc.

This forum is practically Western. If you're on here, you're immersed in Western thinking. Also, because we're a Western forum, we don't exclude people from discussions based on their background

Nah. I didn't live 10 000 years ago, but I sometimes like to discuss how life was like back then. Nobody is gate-keeping me about that.