martin_malin

I used to be a miserable online poker player (from 20 to 27). Today, I speak about LP to high school and college students.

Five years ago, after another dreadful day at work, I asked Google: ‘’How to find your life purpose’’. Being the reliable friend that he is, Google lead me do a bunch of exercises about my passions, skills, values etc. I lost the journal that I used that night but I remember writing furiously for a solid hour. As I kept writing, I started to feel some palpitations in my chest. It’s hard to describe, but I got the sense that something important was about to happen. And boy was I right! No later than couple minutes later, I had a vision! I saw myself giving a powerful talk to a crowd of high school students. The image was immediately followed by an intense electric shock that ran down my spine. HOLY SHIT!!! Trusting the vision was coming from the sacred, I dropped out of Uni not long after to work on the project full-time. Keep in mind that I was a pretty nihilistic guy before that experience…Today, my speaking business is going really well but I feel another change coming soon. I regret not being able to fully speak my mind in a school setting. If I were to do it, I don’t think principals would keep writing me checks. I don't think they would like it either if I told you that I just bought my first bag of mushrooms lol.

I'm taking the LP course atm and I've just found out that my number one value in life is freedom. Problem is, it's negatively motivated. I've always hated school and every job I've ever had made me feel like a slave, unhuman. I just can't stand doing shit I don't care about. In the past, I've even told friends that I would rather die than continue being a slave for someone or some corporation. That desperate need to break free from limitations lead me to quit a well paying job and build a business around my passions. Four years later, I now do meaningful work and earn a nice living do it. Can negative motivation ever be good?

@Leo Gura I love freedom because it allows me to build my own schedule. It allows me to do personnal developement work, to work on my LP, to go on a Vipassana retreat if I want to (I'm contemplating a first one). Freedom is the doorway to my higherself. Ok, I'm beggining to feel grateful for the freedom I now enjoy Last night, I felt very resistant to come up with positive elements. In fact, I even felt justified to hold grudges towards the system. Who am I if I'm not resentful? That ''up your ass'' attitude had served me after all. I think I'm starting to get it. Thx Leo!