molosku

@egoless my first breaktrough was on a low'ish dose. It's an affair of the spirit world, mere mortals cant access the knowledge of faith.

Its not strange at all. Non-duality is common sense after all, if you are open minded enough.

It will only show you this The reason why you cannot die, ever The reason why you are not even alive in the first place What reality is What you are (your body is not you, that body both is and is in you) Really think what I just said. Read that list again. Look at your golf club. It's only literally you. It really is. The ball is also. Also they both are nothing. Just like you. Right now you are fooling yourself big time, so ridiculously big, that your entire existence depends on it. Now look around you, everyone else is in a state of subtle or non subtle panic and avoidance over not knowing any of those things, their entire lives primary motivation is to NOT realize. It's the ultimate glitch in the matrix. NOTHING compares, absokutely nothing. And Im only speaking from two experiences, where I realized only a few aspects of the truth.

@Leo Gura theres lots of talk on 5-LeO, but what about your regular old n, n DMT? Any experiences with that? And yeah, out of all psychedelics especially mushrooms should be respected truly. There is no end to the horror and insanity that potentiates inside every milligram of psilocybin. Its all fun and games when one reads trip reports, but when its happening to you... Oh man

@BestSelf Glad I could help Meditate every day. Dont beat yourself up if you miss a day here and there, you can always practise doing the dishes-zen, going to work-zen, eating-zen etc. Gradually increase your meditation duration, something like 1 minute increase a day will very quickly add up. Dont try to stretch your homeostasis too quickly, it will bounce you back surely if you try. In my practise, I usually experience most peacefullness around 20-40 minute mark, after that it starts to fade into strong determination sitting, that is more intense and challenging, eventhough I still place no expectations on my mindstate. SDT is about frying the the monkey mind, it really hurts lol Find a teacher if that is what your instinct tells you, its your path after all. So give what I suggested a shot. If you do and it works, you probably will eventually gravitate towards practising other techniques also that are a bit more concentration orientated, like vipassana or zazen.

I would not recommend a break. Your anxiety is related to you overthinking, overachieving over grasping mind. You are always present, always in the now and that you cannot escape as that is what you are. What can happen however, is that you have a mind, and that mind is constantly commenting things, connecting dots and and doing its mind stuff and that is all great, one should appreciate the mind, not demonize it. Your mind is going crazy because you have lots of resistance. In your mind you have an idea of the present moment and how it is supposed to feel like and you are trying to live up to it. So doing that, you are actually resisting the actual present moment. There are certain properties that your mind assigns to the concept of the now, one of them is probably that there are no thoughts in the present moment and another might be that being in the now is supposed to be peacefull. The now is what it is, and what ever is in it when it is itself. So when you are sitting, you start a practise of resistance and acceptance. To be more accurate, there is ONLY resistance because acceptance always implies something to be favored instead of something else. What ever moment happens in between thoughts you accept (or subtly feel "yes yes yes more of this! How do i keep it?") , and other things you resist. What I invite you to do is practise do nothing meditation, but I would rename it uniquely to you as "not giving a fuck meditation" Sit down, what ever happens, let it happen. Monkeymind, no-mind, concentration, distraction, results, no results, peace, war, whatever. Just sit and be. Now comes the fun part. Your mind will say "sounds great, how do I do being?" And the answer is you dont! If you notice your mind trying to grasp being, you just notice and dont do anything. Then, as you over time practise, you will naturally start to experience peace, because it comes to you, you dont go to it. "Meditation is consciousness saying yes to all experience" - Rubert Spira

Like others suggested, read Tolle. Depression, anxiety, low confidence, confusion, sadness live and breathe psychological time. They can never be in the now. Well said, could also replace "personal developement" with "happiness". If you make happiness a goal that is in the future, you begin a chase. Its right there with you at all times, the issue is how to realize it. Words are tricky, because my previous sentence will easily lead one to think "well what i need to do to realize it?" its the same paradox as "what i need to DO to be my true self" its a ridiculous question, but also an important one. The critical link is to tranform the "thinker of thoughts" to "perciever of thoughts". When you are unaware that you are actively identifying as the "thinker" suddenly your thought are very important and true and private, and that then transforms itself as your painbody, the subtle or not so subtle physical suffering you are experiencing. When you transform, and become more and more the "perciever" of thoughts, the inner talk loses its grip and importance and it becomes like the feeling of your breath: its there but its not hostile or friendly, its just there. Negativity cannot survive in the light consciousness. All this comes from personal experience, I once were in a very similar place as you describe yourself to be in. I trancended it by just being alone, watching my emotions and thoughts until my depression just gradually faded. It just did not hold power anymore, it just could not withstand being looked at so much. Ultimately what is to be done is to collapse the "perciever/percieved" dualism, but until then it helps very much to make that shift in persepctive. Read tolle! If you already have, read it again! Ps. First find happiness in yourself, then focus on women if you want. If one happens to comes into your life before that, so be it.

Yeah, keep meditating. Leo has a great video about being patient with results.

@iamme your answer is invalid as you didn't answer the trial question. NEXT!

But in order to tell the noobs from the advanced guys, there must be a trial! How else can you know that the answer comes from a deep, ultra spirtual place? I'll save you some trouble and initiate the trial here. In order to answer OPs questions, first answer this question: "what is the sound of one hand clapping?" And only THEN, post no need to thank me @MarkusSweden

Good point, I'm not too emotional of a person But yeah, thats just my perspective

@Mikael89 But why, really? All he could say is "Hi guys, my path is pulling me away from actualized.org, also as an advice, don't blindly believe everything Leo says okay bye" Completely understandable. All this ranting...

Working on more oblivion mods?

So I guess the question is, how do you find the courage to surrender your ego when you’re at this point? What do you do when you’ve reached the edge of this cliff and are too afraid to jump into the void? Is there a person on here who can realate? Has anyone delivered the fatal blow to their ego? What ever your true self is, it's charecteristics must be these: being it must be more effortless than anything you have ever done, anything beyond it requires effort It must be the most simplest thing there is (you dont have to struggle your way into existence right now, do you?) It must be the first thing there is to you Even if you insist there is an enlightenment to be had, I ask you this: why you insist there is this leap that is so difficult to make? What are you trying to gain? Actualized.org is all about giving you the tools to find out and they have their place, but also ask: what happens if I put all these tools away? What is left? What question is unanswered? What is here? (notice how what I just described is another tool ) Walk the path, but remember to undercut the whole path itself. It's a tasty paradox. I know Im walking the path of the great fool, and sometimes I can hear faint laughter in the distance, though sometimes it eerily feels like Im the one laughing. Whats up with that

Less thinking about it, more pursuing of an direct experience of it. Your mind cant grasp it, yet it will try and that is the source of that "neurosis". Your ideas are not IT. Cat is cat. That is that.

Hold on there. Are the suicides actually confirmed? Is the only proof the posts that those users posted?

How dramatic indeed.

INTERMITTENT FASTING is the shit when it comes to stubborn fat. Ive used is very succesfully: lost all the fat annoying ive carried for years while going to the gym and kept most of my strenght and muscle, took only a couple of months. No hunger, lots of energy. Research it, try it. Even a moderate fast cycle like 14/10 or 16/8 works wonders. I just could not lose that fat with regular dieting, I was so hungry all the time. Tri IF

Yeah seems so. MOOODS!!

1) My advice: after you get off work, do what ever you feel like doing, like watch youtube videos aallll night long, but dont neglect the necessery things (eating, washing etc) do this a while and your higher conscious intuition and desire will gradually guide you to more authentic activities. Sometimes there is so much stuff going on that you need to "reset" your habits to rediscover what is most meaningfull, and then you will naturally gravitate towards them from a much better place than before B) ouch, thats a mean comment. Most people are completely unaware of their projections and how they interract with other people, and dont know consepts like higher and lower self, and thusly they just say what ever pops in their mind. Other people might be completely absorbed in the game, you have the upper hand to participate in the game while being aware its a game, so you dont judge judging or yourself or others. Easier said than done ofc.

As I understand stoic principles, its about living according to nature, virtue, justice and what is good and right, developing ones charecter, determination and prevailing. Not so much manlines as masculinity, but leaning towards higher conscious values that as a by product make a balanced and thus masculine man AND a feminine woman. When people talk about someone acting very stoic, they usually just mean one suppresses emotions, is untouched by events and such. Stoicism is much more richer philosophy than that. @Kyle H

You cant know untill you try

Now it renders and works yeah rendering for bunch of devices is a bitch. Very cool idea btw, hope it'll catch some downloads.

Cant find it. Maybe its not rendering? Actualizedoverflow.com

I dont understand what you mean by that. Can you elaborate? But very cool! Crashed a few times when playing around with the frequency but that is to be expeted, keep developing Android 7.0, huawei 8 lite