Clay Basket

I started an unpublished wordpress blog just as a note taking device, I can have a video open in one window and the blog in another. If I hear something that resonates with me I make it the title of a new blog, write a couple bullet points, then close it and come back later. Plus then I can access it on a different device and I don't have to worry about files getting lost or somebody I don't want looking at it. I'm taking 3 or 4 bullet points from his videos and then I can use them as writing prompts from which to add my own reflections. The last one I listened to was "You're Not Happy Because You Don't Really Want To Be" so that stimulated a lot of thoughts in my head about ways that might be true for me, but I need to flesh it out. I am finding that there is a lot to digest. I don't try to take notes on everything, because there are some topics that I feel don't apply to my current life situation, but if I listen to one that really describes where I'm at, then I like to make some notes.

Hello I'm new here, this is a great site. I did a search on nightmares and found several different threads so decided to make my first post here, since all of my demon encounters have been in dreams. I had some intense dreams the past few nights, and in the middle of a scary one, I actually remembered something I read on this site about bad trips and how they can be good learning experiences, so I thought maybe that's true of dreams also. So I kind of made myself stay in the dream for a bit longer than usual. Then last night I had a really scary one, and instead of looking away from the monster in the dream, I just stared at its face and then I became the monster. Usually I wake up terrified, or I just cower in fear till the dream ends, so this time I noticed that I took different attitude during the dream. I don't know if this qualifies as "lucid dreaming" or not. I wasn't in total control, the only thing I remember being in control of was that I chose not to try to look away from the monster's face. I didn't feel as though the demon possessed me, it felt more like I possessed the demon. If indeed I did become possessed, I would say that it wasn't totally horrible; there was a pleasurable aspect to it as well. Then I did all kinds of horrible things as the monster, which I prefer not to go into, and kind of exulted in the evilness of it all, it was as though I was Saruman after having joined the side of Sauron in Lord of the Rings. I might have then awakened and felt like I was a terrible person for indulging in that way, but again I recalled Leo's Rant Against Morality video about not automatically labeling things good or evil. And then I felt less guilty, and now I chalk it up to a super realistic kind of role play, or like if you play a video game and you choose to be the villain character. Although I'd prefer not to have these kinds of dreams on a regular basis, LOL.