Charlotte

Thank you. Me too! I've tried everything with regards to the pain and I'm turning to holistic treatment now. Fingers crossed! Will update xx

Brilliant post. I can totally resonate with what your saying @thehero. I've been told I'm following a cult and all sorts. Been called weird etc. Thank god my own dad loves self actualising! Someone so close to me I can talk to about it ❤️ I'm also struggling to find friends into self actualisation, they all want to drink and party and I'm like "Naaaaar" ?

@Nahm...You have me in creases ?? @LiakosN I feel sorry for you, I've been there and done that. It's awkward AF! How to tell somebody something without offending them? How I'd approach it... After sex I'd say something like "did you smell something then during sex then?" (Look bemused) and then start to smell around yourself (so then she is also curious about her own smell and doesn't think your directly blaming her) and then you could say something like "it smelt like shit, oh god I hope I wiped properly!" (Have a stark look in your eye but look at her as your saying it). Then head off to the bathroom and just pretend your going to investigate. Come back and say "It isn't me", then look reaaaallyyy shocked as if your pointing the smell to her but not directly if you know what I mean. That's how I'd do it anyway. Good luck! ❤️

When you find any in the UK, be sure to inform me please

I'm starting this Saturday, so excited

If I've dedicated my life to helping animal welfare, am I also turquoise? Just asking ??

@Nathan Very true! Taken your advice on board... Thank you @Nadosa Well, I thought it contained very very low amounts of THC (the stuff that actually gets you high in cannabis), so low in fact that I wouldn't feel anything whatsoever. Well after consulting the 'friend' that sold this to me turns out it was riddled with THC, well I haven't touched drugs since I was like 15 (I'm 27 now) so obviously my tolerance is EXTREMELY low so it hit me in the face like a ton of bricks ?. Yes definitely agree they are caused on by thoughts. I've been retracing my steps in my mind and wondering how the hell I ended up where I did! @Faceless Exactly what I've been doing, thank you. My mind did wonder though if I had brain damaged myself, damaged my amygdala or something. Lol! "Your not alone friend" bless you! Thanks ❤️

Last night I had my first ever experience of a severe Panic Attack, it lasted 2 and half hours and I felt like I stared death in the face. I accept what happened. The thing is today I feel numb, flat, emotional less, wanting to be on my own and just very introverted. How do I come back to myself? I feel like I've been emotionally rattled or something, very disorientated.

@Max_V Thank you for your reassuring words. I am a very emotional, happy feeling type personality so to feel 'numb' is very strange for me. Thank you for your well wishes, you too ??

Yep! Me ISFP, -A/-T)

@Shin Yes, I suffer with chronic pain (majority of my life) and have been looking at alternative ways to control the pain, my aim this year was to be free of morphine. So, I done my research online and noticed a pattern of people claiming that CBD oil is miraculously helping their pain. I contacted my family friend who I knew was taking CBD oil. I met up with her, talked about it for hours and she made it very clear that this would not produce any 'high' whatsoever. I repeated myself over and over making sure she knew that I didn't want any 'high' feeling at all, she reassured me. I explained I don't drink or smoke or do drugs at all (apart from my medication) and I'd like to stay as internally pure as possible. You can imagine what happened next can't you, I took the tiniest amount (a dots worth) on my finger and watched for any chronic pain subsiding. Next minute I'm high as a kite. I started to feel anger because this is not what I wanted, I contacted my mum and she said "Just go with it Charlotte, don't resist it, it's happening now and there's nothing you can do about it", so I did. Over the next few hours it became worse, I felt as if I was losing my mind, my partner looking at me worried, which added to the fear inside me! What if it had reacted with my morphine, I thought. I just had no idea what was going on. My behaviour started to scare him which then I fed off because I was thinking the same. I felt myself going into another reality but this reality was like the most strongest most negative emotion you could ever imagine. It was genuinely like I was staring my own death in the face. I called my mum and begged her to ring an ambulance but she knew what it was, THANK GOD! She arrived at my house and talked me through it. So yeah, that's basically it. Sorry it turned out so long. @Nahm That's EXACTLY what I did. I kept talking, noticing my surroundings, listening, begging my mum to keep talking. Your poor son ? I'm so sorry he has been through these ❤️ Thing is though for the past 2 days I've felt emotional less. I am completely numb and I've felt as if I've left myself somewhere back in Monday. It's absolutely awful. I watched 'Walk with me' (documentary film) last night with hope that it would trigger 'me' again, it did for the duration but then it came back.

I'm from Rochdale in Greater Manchester. Nice to know there's e fellow northerner on here UK

Where has this been all my life? Why am I in floods of tears? Wow!! I don't use social media but I have literally just shared this with everyone I know

Plan a visit to the UK and I'd happily contribute £100 to your trip and also an admission fee... *Hopeful face* ? *bribe* *More hopeful face*

@Leo-Tzu ?

Play on the snes and go walking with the dogs in nature.

Ok, over the Christmas holidays I learnt a lot about myself via arguments with my partner. I also feel this is a grey area in my life (my emotional reactions). This is what I have learnt... What I feel are negative: I have a strong sense of ego (becoming very hurt and offended). This is what has stood out to me the most I cry (a lot) due to what feels like internal confusion and pain I dislike conflict Anxiety arrises and can stay prominent throughout the whole argument and for the rest of the day I raise my voice (not in anger but in a passion sense) It affects me emotionally and physically and I'm knackered I feel I'm totally sucked in by the disagreement and my awareness goes out the window What I feel is positive: I'm able to be open minded with regards to the other person's perspective I'm able to apologise where I feel I have done wrong I'm brutally honest with myself I genuinely want opinions and advice on how I could develop myself in these situations. I'd also like some insights on how the rest of you deal with personal relationship arguments please.

@YaNanNallari I've completely taken what you said on board, this could be (for me) a whole new perspective on arguments. Not a fight but rather a problem that requires a solution from both of us. Amazing! Thank you for taking the time to post @Angelo John Gage Thank you for your response. I love your computer metaphor! I have to be honest, although I dislike conflict I'm quite outspoken and do confront someone if I feel it needs addressed. I NEVER EVER blame anybody/anything external for my emotions. I take FULL responsibility for all my actions and for myself. This is actually something I've been talking to my partner about, he can say things such as "well I wouldn't of reacted xyz way if you hadn't of done xyz", I inform him that anything I do or say I am not responsible for, same goes for myself. When I met him he blamed external circumstances for his behaviour, he is slowly starting to change his perspective. Thank you again for your response, very valuable.

@Spiral that's my problem, I sit and stew and I hate the atmosphere it causes, I feel I NEED to resolve it asap so I do struggle to give myself space and my partner. @Shin thank you as always @Kimasxi thank you also for your input.

Had anybody ever been to Plum village? It's quite pricey but I'm contemplating the price to the benefits I could gain. https://plumvillage.org

So you start a Meditation habit. Around how long into it, with daily practice would you start seeing beneficial results? What would the results be? I have googled the benefits of meditation but I'm also interested in other people's personal opinions...

@Privet believe me I've self inquired maaaaany times. I actually had an enlightenment experience and ever since that day, the ego has been unbelievably stubborn, trying to pull me away from what I am seeking, I've persevered but it's 10x as hard. I can literally feel the resistance in my mind. Yes it does, it feels amazing. @phoenix666 your welcome

I've been on the path of PD work solidly for around 3 month's. In this time I've managed to come a hell of a long way. The one thing I cannot seem to get a grip off is my obsessive thoughts, they have turned into an OCD disorder. I've suffered with insecurities for as long as I've been conscious of my thoughts. These insecurities stem mostly around my personal relationships (boyfriend). I've had an assessment from a therapist and they have agreed I need high intensity CBT. The waiting list is a loooong wait and in the meantime I'm suffering... Suffering bad. I won't go into too much detail about the thoughts per se because I feel they are unnecessary. The fact they arise and I feel I have zero control over them is what matters. Does anybody have any self help tips or techniques I can try? I've tried most things with minimal results. Any help would be greatly appreciated. Charlotte X

Thank you @Marks199 appreciate the link and the time you've taken to help me. @ajasatya @The White Belt @Light Lover I'm on page 19 of this book, I see and feel the powerfulness of it already. Thank you for the recommendation ?

@Michael569 thank you! Will research all mentioned, same goes to @pluto and @InfinitePotential. Thank you all so much ??