Iksander

Q. Are you being Self- Responsible? Are you putting yourself through hell? There is no other hell than yourself. Let's examine fear for a minute, please sit and go through this with me for a moment. The Nature Of Fear Crime is committed by Men and Women who have fear inside them, fear of life. They don't understand it. Crimes are committed to try to get a feeling other other than fear, but it never works. The object of fear is to keep you under fear so that other human beings who are passing it onto you can try to feel relief from anxiety and insecurity (which never happens) A Bold Move See that the purpose of fear is to intimidate you. To make you think you are necessarily under it's all power, but it isn't all power. It seems to be because you haven't achieved a certain insight yet. That means you must get rid of your fear, and that is the solution to the whole business. You are going to have to be spiritually unique. You're going to have to be a Truly noble human being. Through the nobility of Reality itself NOT of your own self. You're going to have to break the pattern that has kept your insecurity in place. And you can do it right NOW. Relief Is No Relief When you choose relief from your tension, from your worry, when you choose to relieve it, it always comes back. What are you doing to relieve your fear of life? What are you doing to escape the fact that you have no idea who you are? Some go into alcoholism, others become workaholics, others invent a variety of escapes. Be Audacious! Why don't you be very audacious right now and never again relieve your anxiety. No matter who is pursuing you down those dark foggy streets, no matter what is after you, REFUSE to try and escape from it to find relief. Imagination, false concepts about yourself (e.g. I am unlovable). When you have a false concept about yourself you are afraid because you are apart from reality. You feel unreal, and that is fear, then you create all these fears because it has become your solidified life! Most people never escape a certain horror which is this; They alternate between being the scared girl and the hooded figure stalking the scared girl in the foggy streets.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHe0bXAIuk0&ab_channel=PrinciplesbyRayDalio

@Breakingthewall

@Mason Riggle Ah, I don't mean independent like this.. I have trouble using words

@Inliytened1 I see that the only way to move in the right direction is to be directly conscious now. For example being 'unattached' as a mental strategy is not the same of being directly conscious of yourself, therefore becoming emotionally independent through awareness of what is, or Truth.

Then, there's nothing to be gained or lost here, isn't it? Chasing things in the material world becomes a waste of time. The question becomes how deeply this experience of life can be enjoyed

@Mason Riggle This exercise makes me realize that 'I' am awareness

I had just now, a glimpse of awareness into the possible nature of non-duality. I have been in great pain over the last few days, replaying different situations that hurt me over and over in my mind in order to learn from them, exploring them as deeply as I can. After entertaining a few different perspectives and coming up with solutions, I became open to the possibility that I created all of the problems, including the people who "wronged" me. When I analyze where people have hurt me I see that I would've also hurt another the same way. Is it possible that I am creating experiences unconsciously so that I may wake myself up? That those people in my life are actually me, and I them? That the inner world and the outer world, perceived in my mind as separate, are actually one and the same?

When appearing as agents of social morality, they solemnly insist it is your moral duty to help others, then when you are betrayed by others, they sit back and laugh at your stupidity and gullibility. They give you bad advice for helping yourself, then when you take it, they accuse you of stupidity and claim you will never 'make it' -Vernon Howard

@Mason Riggle What a beast of a laugh that was

I am currently laughing like a maniac for no reason. I feel like I just took a drug (I didn't) I sat down to meditate and became conscious of how utterly ridiculous and wonderful life is. ITS ALL EXPERIENCE. IT DOESN'T MEAN ANYTHING AND THAT IS THE MOST FREEING AND WONDERFUL THING ABOUT IT! I feel a tremendous weight off my shoulders, I feel light, I want to play. There's an art to living life, you know? I have small human goals, ambitions ect and they are fun, but that's all they are. It's all about the approach to them. One thing I Know for sure is that I am going to enjoy this ride and squeeze every last juicy drop out of it that I can. It's so fucking beautiful.

One does not become tired of a self image, the self image makes one tired like carrying around a heavy weight. Hopefully tired enough to such point where they give it all up

Insight that helped me see through the imaginary self. Who takes a break? This is illusory, what is really happening is you have become tired of carrying your imaginary self around all the time. God takes no breaks.

Experienced this in meditation yesterday. My face contorted and animalistic faces and tension poured out of me, felt like a mini-death. I hope that happens again and again until there is nothing left

All the ways that you are afraid of being hurt by someone are ways that you would hurt others. -Vernon Howard