Gonda

Be aware though that you don't use cold showers as an escape from inner emotions though. I have been feeling shitty because I was not fully present and I coped with that through taking cold showers and getting present again. Go deep into WHY you are feeling shitty and remember that even Cold Showers or say Meditation can be used as an escape.

@Cosmic The problem is though, that it's like the moment I look any beautiful girl in the eyes (to note, this should only be an example!), my consciousness shuts off, I go about my routine and even if I would be anxious, I would not be aware enough to know in the moment. @Aimblack Seems reasonable.. hmm

Hey, I hope that this topic hasn't been started yet, but I wasn't able to find anything similar through google search, so I hope you forgive me. What is my observation? Previously, I only had triggers which triggered me in an emotional way and have thrown me out of being in unawareness for a specific amount of time at least. But then, the more conscious I got, the more I realized that there aren't only just Emotional triggers for me, but also unawareness triggers. There are moments, in which, even if I am pretty aware, I get "triggered" through little cues to get into unawareness. Examples/Clarification: One practical example which illustrates what I am struggling with is like: Imagine you are fully aware, just meditated and in public transport. You feel inspired to talk to a girl. Then you say something to gain her attention, still being fully present. But then when she looks you in the eyes, that moment you lose all consciousness and you go into autopilot mode only to later realize that you have been unaware the whole time. One might think that this is just a social anxiety thing (that's what I thought too), but then I realized that this wasn't just happening in social situations directly. Another example was like when you go into a classroom (still in school) and then you dive into autopilot the moment you go through the door frame. Or the moment you go through the door frame of the kitchen to get some food. Or if you stand up to hold a speech (the moment you stand up, not the moment you are on the stage). Even if we would attribute some of it to social anxiety, for me, learning something in social situation is only done by being fully present, and as such, this would indirectly hindering my progress. I am aware that in general, unawareness tends to creep in all the time steadily, but for it to come in so quickly and radically through those kinds of triggers is new for me. The point of this post: Do you experience similar things? How do you handle them? For me, trying to get to change them is REALLY hard, as I only realize that I was unaware, AFTER some time after I got triggered. Have you found a way to (at least slowly) fight this?

@Cosmic How are you able to tell yourself to focus on your breathing if you are unaware of the fact that you are anxious?