RickyFitts

Oh wow, Tristan, this is so beautiful. Just keep surrendering to love.

I think what probably helped the most for me was simply recognising that I wasn't the person I'd imagined myself to be, which came as a huge relief (mind you, it was very disorienting,too, because then it was like, 'Okay, if I'm not that, what am I?' I still haven't figured that one out, ten years later ). Low self-esteem was something I suffered with for most of my llife, I'd come to believe a lot of very negative things about myself: 'I'm stupid', 'I'm ugly', 'I can't do anything right', 'I'm useless'. This was mostly due to a combination of me just being a very sensitive, troubled kid anyway (stress and depression run in my family, largely on my mum's side), and my relationship with my dad, who could be incredibly insensitive and tactless, and it left me with the following core belief, which was what really ultimately broke my heart: 'I am inherently unworthy of love'. Because I think the thing we humans long for the most, when you get right down to it, is love, and acceptance, and so to feel yourself fundamentally unworthy of these things is so painful that it feels utterly, unfaceably painful. So you end up doing everything in your power to not feel that pain. But the cure for the poison is IN the poison, as they say; you really have to allow yourself to feel that pain in order to heal it. But that's easier said than done, mostly because we build up so much unconscious resistance against it, and so you have to become conscious of that inner resistance first, and allow it to release. Then everything you'd been repressing can surface, which is good, ultimately, but it can be a very challenging, very painful process. Developing presence in my body has been most helpful for me personally, because it's in our bodies that we store these traumas and emotional wounds - this is where practices like yoga and meditation are so important I think.

Love this perspective.?

Thought and feeling are intertwined, they're two sides of the same coin. So maybe try inquiring into what's driving your thoughts on an emotional level, and just allow those emotions to fully emerge and be felt.

Oh you should definitely do this, I only wish I could be there to see it because I'd absolutely piss my sides at their puzzled expressions! ? Oh I'm mean sometimes...

Shadows settle on the place that you left Our minds are troubled by the emptiness Destroy the middle, it's a waste of time From the perfect start to the finish line And if you're still breathing, you're the lucky ones 'Cause most of us are heaving through corrupted lungs Setting fire to our insides for fun Collecting names of the lovers that went wrong The lovers that went wrong We are the reckless, we are the wild youth Chasing visions of our futures One day we'll reveal the truth That one will die before he gets there And if you're still bleeding, you're the lucky ones 'Cause most of our feelings, they are dead and they are gone We're setting fire to our insides for fun Collecting pictures from a flood that wrecked our home It was a flood that wrecked this And you caused it And you caused it And you caused it Well, I've lost it all, I'm just a silhouette I'm a lifeless face that you'll soon forget My eyes are damp from the words you left Ringing in my head, when you broke my chest Ringing in my head, when you broke my chest And if you're in love, then you are the lucky one 'Cause most of us are bitter over someone Setting fire to our insides for fun To distract our hearts from ever missing them But I'm forever missing him And you caused it And you caused it And you caused it

I've posted this one before, but oh, I just love it so much...

@Batman Absolutely, great post.

@Preety_India Ahh, makes sense, Pisces is a highly passionate sign.

Gemini, what's yours?

Anything that dulls the senses and hardens the heart, I'd say. Ideally you want to be engaging in things that make you feel more enlivened and conscious. But there aren't hard-and-fast rules about these things, I don't think - follow your passion, that's all.

Hehehe, I love ya Preets! You just need a man who matches your passion!

Any time, Preets ?

Whether you've had a lot of sex or you're still a virgin, the ultimate truth is these things don't define what you are - 'slut' and 'virgin', they're just empty labels ultimately. It doesn't matter how much sex you've had, you're equally worthy of love either way. Nothing will ever change that. ?

I used to be rather dubious about the notion, but I've since experienced deep connections with women and I'm now in no doubt that yeah, soulmates really do exist - they just stand out from the crowd when you cross paths with them, you can't help but be drawn to them. And you can't help but love them, too, it's like it's just in your nature to, you couldn't not love them.

I love your passion, Preets. Unfettered female sexuality's a wonderful thing.

Love that. I feel like emotional connection is the key for me personally, without that it just feels kind of empty. Of course you do need to have physical attraction too, it goes without saying.

Sexual repression's such a tough one, because sexuality is simply a part of who we are - so when we repress our sexual energy, we're repressing ourselves, ultimately. I think the key thing is just accepting and integrating your own sexuality - it's a beautiful, intoxicating part of who you are, and repressing that aspect of yourself just isn't good for your well-being. I get it, though, it's something I've struggled with a lot in my own life - sexual repression goes hand-in-hand with emotional repression, it seems to me, I notice how aggressive my sexual expression tends to be when it's coming from an emotionally-repressed place. And, ugh, it's just not very pleasurable or loving, I fell madly in love with a woman recently and I couldn't imagine touching her with that sort of sexual aggression.

I remember a few years back when I was wrestling with thought, a question arose in my mind: What would it be like if I couldn't think? It was an interesting question to contemplate, to notice what sorts of emotions arose in response to the question - helped me to better-understand the role of thought in my life.

Notice what is preventing expansion.

Do practices like yoga and meditation that bring attention into the body. Intuition is something you feel rather than a mental process, so body-awareness is key to it I think.

Become intimate with that feeling of discomfort - notice exactly what it feels like in the body, and where exactly you feel it. If you notice pockets of tension in certain places in your body, allow those areas to relax and breathe. Notice any emotions that might also arise as you do this, and just allow them to be felt. The key is to feel.