Forestluv

@Key Elements “Strangers / acquaintances, friends / good friends, best friends / BFFs” This seems like categories to me. Or a linear continuum. I guess it makes casual conversation more convinient, yet when we dig deeper, it breaks down for me.

It’s an acquired taste. After the “no free will” thing sank in, I spent a couple weeks pretty much in bed. There was no personal will to do anything.

@Key Elements To me, it seems like you are categorizing relationships. My mind doesn’t really work like that. For example, I was in a one year open relationship that went deeper and more intimate than an 11 year monogamous relationship I was in. Yet in some respects, the 11 year relationship was deeper and more intimate.

It gets even worse than that. There is no you. Now start exploring beyond the illusionary self.

@Thanatos13 To me, it seems like you are attached to forms of “right” or “wrong” thinking. The thing is, you are both right and wrong. You just can’t see it. You are in conflict with others as to who is right or wrong. Usually, there is internal conflict as well. Many people get stuck in an intense right/wrong trap for years, even decades. I suffered in it for years before I was ready to let go. There is great peace and freedom with this direct experience. That’s just my perspective. There are many other perspectives. Listen to your intuition and your authenticity- below all the chatter that is trying to figure it all out and prove to others you are right. The real you is sooo much beyond these contracted thoughts you are identifying with.

I think I've finally reached a solid stage green - both intellectually and emotionally. I visit yellow periodically, yet I don't feel grounded in yellow.

@Thanatos13 We create our own traps. Many people on the board have solved a similar trap to the one you are in now, yet only you can solve the trap you created. The good news is you left yourself a way out. Get through it and move on. . .

I've been there, my friend. I really have. You have no idea what you are missing.

@Elisabeth Thank you for sharing your insights Elisabeth!

Of course it does. You have a very limited scope of awareness. Anything outside your limited scope will seem odd, irrational, "whoo whoo", nonsense, over-complicated, egocentric etc. Argue for a contracted mind and it is yours. Identification with contracted thinking is like drinking gutter water. You now have an invitation to become aware of, and let go of, your attachments and drink juice more delicious than you can imagine. But hey, if you like drinking gutter water, have at it.

Here is an example of an ideological green vegan. Rather than view her as some "crazy bitch", see if you can view someone so empathetic to the suffering of others that she herself is suffering. One of the difficulties for the green stage is becoming extremely empathetic for those that are being oppressed or suffering. To the point it's crippling. I've had moments of being overcome with empathy - to the point I am internalizing and experiencing the pain and suffering of someone else.

I think I have a similar orientation. I'm more oriented to going deeper within a monogamous relationship, than multiple relationships. One of the hardest beliefs for me to overcome was that monogamy goes deeper with one person and poly is more surface level with multiple people. My perspective from the poly community: each person has a type of energy, characteristics, a type of attraction. Yet no one person can contain all forms. Consider different friends. No one friend can contain all the features you like in friends. So we have multiple friends. Each friend has a different personality and type of energy that we enjoy. We love each friend. . . For example, a woman may like intellectual conversations with a brilliant scientist, yet also like the creative space a brilliant musician takes her. The scientist fills her intellectual wants, while the musician fills her creative wants. It's a very different place and experience with each man. They each bring out a certain part of her. She doesn't want to limit herself to one type of experience. Now add sexuality to the mix. Things like Intellect, creativity, emotion, physical, sexual transcend and merge to collectively form a type of energy. Once I let my guard down, I was able to experience this form of love. It was very different than anything I have experienced. It passed through me intermittently, yet I couldn't maintain it. Overall, I see that healthy and unhealthy aspects exist in both monogamy and polyamory.

You are not seeing one of the facets regarding relative and absolute truths. Generally, psychedelics can expose it. Otherwise, lots of sitting on the cushion!

One of the hallmarks of a contracted mind is attachment to being "right" or "wrong". Another feature is defending a perspective as being "right". Please realize there are much more sophisticated views than the one you currently hold. Your view seems to be primarily based on a simple binary mode of thinking with an elementary understanding of spectrums - and lacking higher order relative perspectives. You just can't see it right now. On the spiral, you are transitioning from blue to orange. The reason the spiral looks like "nonsense" to you is that you are unable to comprehend the higher stages. If you want to evolve beyond what you can currently imagine. . . open your mind.

So then you realize you are both wrong and right? You speak truth as you lie.

From my point of view, you are attached to a limited perspective. I encourage you to keep exploring with an open mind. For me, admitting I knew very little and genuinely trying to understand other perspectives was the key to expanding my mind.

@Alphahedgehog Having a sense of security and freedom is very high on my value list as well. I intentionally chose a career that allowed me personal freedom to do the work I want - with freedom to choose hours and vacation. I make an average U.S. salary. I could easily double or triple my salary by entering corporate America. Yet, it isn't worth the loss of freedom to me. I would be careful with expectations. Most people I know with high incomes do not have a sense of freedom and security. They get a new house or save some money and temporarily feel more secure. Then, insecure again and they chase for more. Nothing is enough for them - they always need more. . . There is a freedom much deeper than anything material.

@Widdle Puppy A person can be intellectually centered in one stage and emotionally centered in another stage. When I evolved past orange, I lost the desire to debate oranges and blues. Rather than wanting to prove my point and be right, I became interested in sharing ideas and learning new perspectives. I now find it challenging to interact with solid orange / blues effectively.

Awesome report. I love seeing a fellow human doing the work and expanding the mind. So beautiful.

@WaveInTheOcean Yep. A centered, healthy green can easily spot orange, blue and fake green. JP is obviously orange / blue. IMO, Sam Harris is centered at a very high level orange. I hope he can transition through green and yellow. His orange foundation would be so strong - imagine him being at full-on yellow.

iTalki.com is a great place to meet natives and chat over skype

Teachers have seen many traps and can help a student through traps.

Why would you love to have a good financial future? What would that bring you? What would having a poor financial future look like?

You seem to be using "enlightenment" as if it is a process or a destination. Or, that enlightenment is some "thing". For me, direct experiences into what IS, blow away all conceptual constructs. Of course, my mind wants to make sense of the experience - yet the actual experience is waaay beyond my mental constructs. At times, it makes no rational sense. It is insane. Rather than pursuing rational answers to your questions for decades (As I did), I would turn the table and ask: "From what/where are these questions arising?". "From what/where is the seeking energy arising?". For my stage of development, I see ego/self/personality WITHIN consciousness.

Most teachers I consider to be awake use "awareness" and "consciousness" as pretty much the same. At my stage of development, trying to discern between the two creates an intellectual distraction. However, I am curious about the differences between concentration and awareness/consciousness.