Forestluv

Yes. Thanks for making this point. Yin yoga postures should only be held at about 70% max stretch. Some discomfort is ok and good. Yet it should not be forced or entered into pain zones or hands and feet getting numb and tingly. As well, in the beginning, poses should only be held for 2-3 minutes. Also, don’t force postures. For example, in the quad stretch posture in the above video, my hips were too tight to enter into the full posture, so I had to stay with my upper-body upright and it turned into a hip opener posture rather than a quad posture. It’s important to listen to the body. Also, when the mind enters into deep meditative states, the relationship with pain can be altered. I’ve entered zones in which I could transform pain into swirling energy of flairs and warm chocolate. Zones in which time stops and I go waaay too deep because I’ve lost sense of “pain” and “time”. A couple times, this led to over-stress which took me days to recover from. @Dutch guy Thanks for the links on Tai Chi. I’ve been feeling desire for energy flow and motion. I’ve got a bit through vinyasa, yet Tai Chi has been popping up recently. . . .

You mentioned body awareness. . .for me it takes practice of observation. To observe the mind and body. . . This isn’t easy for my mind as it often gets bored, wants to do something else or goes into la-la land. Yet when I can get into the zone, a lot about body awareness is revealed. . . For example, last night I was able to get in the zone and scanned my body of tightness and tensions. I breathed into areas and thought to let go within certain body areas. There was a “release” and the body sank a bit lower - almost like sand. . . I actually experienced “release”. I had thought release was ‘supposed’ to be a different way. Yet there it was releasing. It was amazing.. . . I also got insight into how my body stores negative inputs from my environment. As I observed, it was so clear how different stresses, judgements, criticisms are stored in my body. Some recent inputs and some that happened long ago. This is a different form of release. . . Physical, mental and emotional. . . So beautiful. . .

The discomfort might be due to prior conditioning, being vulnerable, not being reciprocated or not one’s style. I grew up in a very stoic environment - there were no heart-to-heart talks. Love was not expressed through words. It was most commonly expressed through gift-giving (which isn’t my ‘love language’). For me, saying “I love you” in words doesn’t carry much weight. Quality time together has much higher resonance. That means being fully present with each other, being interested in each other, sharing meaningful moments with each other. If I’m out in a cafe with a friend and they spend most of the time on their phone and I’m a distraction. . .that doesn’t feel like love to me. Even if they say “I love spending time with you”, it wouldn’t carry much weight. . . Yet, saying the words can feel uncomfortable or awkward to me. Perhaps a combination of prior conditioning and not resonating with that type of intimacy. If I wanted to express it words, I would probably write a heart-felt love poem. . .

I find Yin yoga to be great for meditative body awareness. I’ve enter some deep states. In the beginning, there is learning the postures, surrendering and letting go. . . It can be challenging, yet that is part of the breakthrough. I’ve found online instructors with a good vibe can be a helpful guide to get into the zone. . . I’ve recently discovered Bohobeautiful yoga. She has that “essence” I resonate with. Mind, body, spirit connection. Yet also connection to earth, wind, water, earth. . . Below is a session I did last night. It is a beginner series that incorporates some easy flow with yin. The postures are only held for 2min. each. For me, her guide helped me let go and release. . .

Sure. Desire can be associated with suffering. And desire can be associated with inspiration, creativity, motivation, motion and zest. And lack of desire can be associated with apathy. . . Let’s observe and consider different relationships with desire. . . Right now, it’s morning and I have a desire to go hiking in nature. What is the underlying energetics of this desire? Do I want to escape the present moment? Am I sitting in my house feeling like a loser, thinking about how much my life sucks and wishing I could hike in nature like the cool people I see on YouTube? . . . If so, that is a dynamic of suffering. . . . Let’s check in. . . Nope. I’m cool with the present moment. I’m drinking a delicious green tea, expressing my thoughts on actualized and feeling a desire to be in nature. . . This desire puts a smile on my face. This desire inspires imagination and curiosity. I feel excitement imagining which trails I may hike today. What animals will I see? How many birdsongs will I hear? What will I encounter that I cannot imagine now? My mind and body is not seeking to escape the feeling of desire Now, it is content experiencing it. That is the flow with what is. . . Let’s consider shifts in desires and unmet desires. . . Let’s say my desire to hike leads to a desire to share the experience with my friend Sally. I call Sally and ask if she would like to hike with me. Sally says she can’t because her son is sick. This is an unmet desire. How does my mind and body react? Do I go with the flow or get snagged? . . .Do I get upset and think Sally is lying to me because she doesn’t like me? Do I passive aggressively guilt trip Sally so I can get something in the future? Do I worry that Sally might ask me to help her sick son and I won’t get to go hiking? . . . These are dynamics of conflict and suffering. Let’s suppose I let go of Sally and pursue my desire to hike. I drive to the trail and the park is closed due to the Coronavirus shutdown. How do I respond? Do I go with the flow and say “Oh well, there’s lots of other things to do. Maybe I can do another trail”. Can I laugh at the silliness of the moment?. . . Or do I get snagged? Does my mind and body get frustrated by my unmet desire? Do I start thinking about how stupid the shutdown is and how I’m getting screwed? Do I throw a temper tantrum? . . . These are dynamics of suffering. It’s not the desire itself. Pure, innocent and genuine desire is beautiful. It is the attachment, grasping, personal agenda, escape and expectation dynamics associated with desire that fuel suffering. . . . Sometimes I watch birds expressing their desire to fly - it is so beautiful. . .

@Exystem Those are some nice exploratory descriptions. ? ?

@Danioover9000 Rather than trying to define “non-existence”, perhaps you could explore it’s essence. For example, walk in nature and observe. . . Observe things that “sorta exist”? Observe the non-existence in existence and the existence in non-existence.

Of course. Simply observe how truthful your delusions are. . .

@Artaemis The thoughts were not directed at you. They just appeared while reading the thread, in general.

I’m reminded of. . .

A couple years ago, I was living in Honduras taking Spanish classes. I was very motivated to speak properly - proper grammar and pronunciation. Yet I became so immersed in technicalities that I wasn’t making any progress. I was missing something. . . One day during class, I stopped the teacher (once again) to point out a technical inconsistency in the grammar she was teaching. She finally became exasperated and said “Yea, you are technically correct. But you aren’t learning to speak Spanish”. She then pointed to another student. We arrived on the same day as beginners. Yet there she was, speaking Spanish with others. They were cooking a meal and laughing together. I then realized what I was missing and my progress took off. Two weeks later, I was having conversations with locals. . . Laughing and enjoying our time together. Similarly, I can stand up and shout from the rooftop that “Unconditional Love includes raping children and murdering innocent people”. Technically, this is correct - yet I’m not learning how to ‘speak’ Love. . . There is an awakening of the intellect and there is an awakening of the heart. . .

Thanks for this prompt. Recently, I’ve been observing the dynamics of desire in my mind and body. In particular, how desirous thoughts, feelings, motion and manifestation are inter-related. In my current state, I would say ‘no’. For example, right now I want pain in my back to stop. This is the same as not wanting the pain to continue. Yet there is an absence of wanting/not wanting the dog across the street to stop barking (there is no dog across the street barking).

@JayG84 In regards to manifestation, I try to be mindful of gaming the system. For example, I might desire a gf and happy times together. This mindset may be oriented toward something positive, yet I’ve got to be mindful of using it as a short-cut. From a self-centered view I may think “I want a gf and happy times together” and expect the LOA to bring me a gf and happy times. If this doesn’t happen, I may get frustrated. However, the desire for a gf and happy times together might attract books and workshops about how to develop into a person that is capable of having a healthy relationship. The LOA may bring in resources to help me work through past baggage and karma. However, this might not be what the self had in mind. . . I find it insightful to closely observe feelings and imagery of desire and motion toward manifestation. For example, I’ve been doing Yoga everyday for about 50 days. Last night at 10pm I hadn’t done Yoga, yet I wanted to keep my streak going. So, I forced myself to start yoga. After 30min., I was not into it. I started thinking about how much time is left and what I will do when it’s over. My muscle starting aching and I started imagining sitting on the couch with a smoothie watching a video. It was so much more pleasurable than my current state. Rather than acting on it, I just observed. The impatience grew and the desire got stronger. The imagery got clearer. It was like the mind and body desired it so much that it created irresistible imagery and desire. How could I say no? . . . I continued observing and it got so strong and clear, I could almost taste the smoothie. I observed how thoughts, feelings and motion are interconnected as the body stood up, walked to the blender and prepared a smoothie. . . So yes, thoughts and feelings can manifest reality and it’s amazing to observe the process (rather than being immersed within the desire).

The add-in of ‘wanting’ creates such a subtle shift. . . Wanting is conditional since it is a want for one condition in contrast to another condition. Not wanting a thing is also conditional. There is not wanting of a particular condition. Wanting and not wanting exist together as contrast. If there is a wanting to kill the weeds in a garden, there is a not-wanting the weeds to live.

Another fragment recall from my lucid dream hike two days ago. When the thought stream (mentioned above) appeared, there was simply a thought stream. There was no difference from a thought stream in my own mind or a thought stream between two people. Similarly, there was no difference between hiking solo or hiking with someone else. It’s the clearest I’ve experienced that. Another thing. . . I’ve noticed how feelings are a better barometer of my relationship with reality than thoughts. I’ve heard this many different ways for years, yet there was a deeper “getting it” today. I’ve noticed how much more weight I’ve been giving to thinking, yet feelings are a better sensor. For example, the mind may have a realization that all perspectives are relative. There may be a sense of “Omigosh, reality is simply relative to the perceiver”. . . Then someone may say to me “That’s a low conscious idea. You still have a long way to go”. . . The mind may think “Well, that is their relative perception”. . .yet how does the body respond? Does the body still get annoyed? Will the body stay annoyed for hours afterwards? Will thoughts like “I should have said xyz. That would have shown them I’m at a high level”. These feelings would indicate that the realization is still at a surface level of intellectual thoughts and has not yet been embodied.

Sorry, you don’t get to write the rules. . .you still have a lot more surrender left to go. . .

I’d say this is best expressed through “I AM”. We could consider a series of stages. At first the mind is immersed into the personal identification of “I am”. . . “I am a 40 yr. old plumber who lives in California. I have three kids. I like eating pizza with Budweiser beer”. That kinda thing. The next stage is catching a glimpse of self-dissolution. For example brief moments such as: being in awe of a majestic sky, playing the trumpet, playing soccer, unified in bliss - in which the self and time briefly dissolve. There is only this majestic sky, the trumpet seems to be playing itself etc. Humans love this state and many spend considerable time and energy trying to reach these states. Yet they are just glimpses that don’t stick. They are contextualized into an experience. For example “Wow!! I totally got into the zone playing the trumpet just now. That was amazing. I want more of that”. This is still full-on identification to the self - it was an experience I had. The next “stage“ can be much more troublesome for the self construct. Rather than a simple dissolution of the self, there is realization of a higher “I AMness”. For example, there is awareness that I AM the soccer ball, goalie, crowd and grass. In the beginning, this is just a brief glimpse and there can be a range of impact. It can feel liberating and wonderful or it can feel scary and threatening. . . . If a mind sticks with it, awareness of a distinction can arise. . . There “me” yet also this “beyond me”. . . At an immature stage, this can be interpreted and experienced in all sorts of ways. For some minds, it may seem like a psychosis - like multiple selfs. For other minds, it may seem like an “observer” of “my self”. For other minds, a no-self state may serve as an escape from self identity. It can be very peaceful and blissful or there can be anxiety and resistance. One of the mind’s tendencies is to claim ownership. At early stages, it’s super common to hear things like “I need to work on my ego”. “My ego has been causing me problems, how can I tame it?” Here, a self construct has simply fragmented into “my good self and my bad ego”. . . A bit more advanced would be: “I’ve awakened and I am the observer of the self”. Yet this is still early on as there is ownership of being the “observer” or some “transcendent” awareness. Ime, this is where it gets tricky and subtle. One thing that can provide clarity of distinction is “I AM”. There is “I AM” and there is whatever comes after “I AM”. This is a super easy way to see self identification, yet it is unpalatable to the self as it threatens the existence of the self. If we can’t add anything to “I AM”, then there is no self construct. Yet this can get quite subtle such as “I am the observer”, “I am awakening”. It gets subtle and tricky because the mind often leaves off the “I am” part, it is an underlying assumption. . . A mature distinction between Self and self arises with repetitive and ongoing detachment and dis-identification - yet this is much easier thought than done. Ime and my observations, it takes a lot of practice. There can be major realizations, yet old patterns generally re-emerged. As well, there is a sense that “this is it”. It takes willingness, curiosity and (right) effort to go deeper and become aware of more subtle forms. At a more mature embodied stage, there is clearer awareness of “I AM” vs “I AM xyz”. For me, a couple easy ways to see where I’m at is to notice how attached I am to “me-ness”, how easily can I let go? For example, if Leo replied that this essay is a self-centered distraction and told me to get back to work, would there be an “I” that reacts? How would this “I” react? It may think “I’m not good enough” or “Leo doesn’t know what he’s talking about”. . . How would this feel? The body may feel defensive or embarrassed. What if Leo responded that this essay was pure enlightenment flowing from the Divine. . .would there be and “I” that reacts? It may think “Wow, I’ve made a lot of progress!!”. This may produce a good feeling of self-worth or pride. . . Yet the I AM is prior/transcendent to this. With practice, the distinction gets clearer and clearer. It becomes more obvious to the I AM (Self), when the i am (self) starts adding personal stuff in. Here, the mind may think “The essay that appeared is distractive hogwash from one perspective, yet also brilliant from another perspective.” There is no ownership or personal attachment/identification. Yet thinking this is a surface level. For me, feelings are a deeper indicator. For example, if someone replies that this essay is distractive hogwash, I can easily think “Yes, from one perspective it is”. Yet this is simply putting spiritual lipstick on the personalized idea of “That’s just your opinion”. A deeper indicator is the feeling response. If someone says this is distractive hogwash, does a feeling of defensiveness or unworthiness arise in my body? This would be indicative of personalization/identification/attachment. A more transcendent essence might be a curiosity of another view. Or perhaps laughter arises since the “other person” criticicizing me is actually me! We are both one and I am criticizing myself - which can feel quite comical. For me, these constructs helped provide a sense of grounding as I progressed. Yet as we go to deeper levels, both the constructs and progression are imaginations. Since the mind is no longer immersed into self, the mind is fluid and can now observe inter-relationships between Self and self as well as Self = self.

@WHO IS To me, you seem to construct a lot (as does my mind). I’ve found it helpful to pause and examine the underlying components of the construction. Your OP has months worth of observation, yet it’s tempting for the mind to skim over, ime. There are many forms and answers here. One way to look at it is impermanence. If something is impermanent, why engage? If my hike up the mountain will be over by tomorrow, why hike up the mountain? If my gf and I will one day be separated through breakup or death, why date? If my vision will be lost, why see? . . . The answer to this depends on the person. One person may answer that there is only Now and to live for the moment. Another person may answer that we have been conditioned through evolution and upbringing to behave as we do. Another person may answer that the idea of an ending is simply a thought and not actuality. Another person may answer that they work to give their children a better life. There is no single, objective, universal answer in a relative context. Personally, when this question arises in my mind I try to refrain from creating logical constructs. Rather, I prefer to sit in nature and observe, why. The answer is there if my mind becomes empty and clear. I observe the trees, river, wind and birds - they show me why. . . Yet that’s what I resonate with at this point in life. 20 years ago, I would have scoffed at what I write here. And I have no idea what I will resonate with in 20 years from now. There are three components here that are each worth months/years of experimentation, contemplation, realization, integration and embodiment. There could be a dramatic awakening of the whole she-bang, yet this is rare. . . The components are: God/me, Perfect/perfect, Now/timeline. Combining them all together creates at least eight combinations of construction. It’s possible to awaken to one singularity, yet again this seems to be quite rare. Setting aside the God/me aspect for a moment, let’s consider the other two components from a generic observer view. Here, I use the standard upper-case for Absolute and lower-case for relative: 1) Some things are imperfect now and some things are imperfect within a timeline of past and future. (This is were 99.9% of the population spend 90% of their mind state). 2) Some things are imperfect now and everything is perfect in a timeline. (This is the idea of “Things are rough now, yet everything will be OK”). 3) Everything is Perfect Now and some things are imperfect within a timeline. 4) Everything is Perfect Now and Everything is Perfect within a timeline. Each of these constructs are within Truth. They are not mutually exclusive and there are many more varieties, yet these are the basic building blocks. When the mind asks “why do anything if everything is already perfect?”, it is conflating multiple components - for example #1 and #4. If a mind is immersed within construct #1 and has not realized, integrated and embodied #s 2-4, perception will be distorted and cloudy. . . If a mind only knows a cup to be something to drink coffee out of, the mind will be confused when a boxing match is paused when one of the boxers has a broken cup. The mind would need to let go of it’s contraction and attachment to the meaning of “cup” to gain a broader view and clearer understanding. Otherwise, it makes no sense to pause the boxing match since neither boxer needs a cup to drink coffee. It makes no sense. Similarly, a mind would need to let go of meanings for “god” and “perfect” to gain a broader view and clearer understanding. I’m not sure if you mean “self contractionary” or “self contradictory” here. . . In terms of “self contractionary”, all constructs are a contraction of the whole (yet can be an expansion relative to a more contracted state). Life is an ongoing balance between contraction and expansion. During meditation or yoga, observe the breath. The out-breath is contraction and the in-breath is expansion. . . In terms of your statement, I suppose we could consider personal growth as expansion. Yet I wouldn’t consider loss of self or death as contraction. I would consider immersion into constructions as contraction. In terms of “self contradictory”, the mind creates contradictions. If the mind holds onto one side of an opposition, the reciprocal view will appear contradictory. For example: “The journey is the destination”. If we hold onto the idea of a destination as a separate point, how can the journey toward that destination be the destination? This is a contradiction the mind creates. Similarly, the mind can create a thing called a “self” that exists now, yet will not exist in the future. We could then ask “What’s the purpose of self improvement if my self will die?”. . . To me, a deeper question would be “Why create a self construct, that will die?”. This drops the assumption that a “self” is inherently a real thing. Here, the self is a creation. The realness of this self is negatively correlated to the awareness of it’s creation (i.e. as awareness of the self increases, the realness of the self decreases). . . This relates to the God/me component of your original three component question above. Here, I use the terms Self (God) and self (me). As awareness of Self increases, realness of self decreases. . . Confusion arises when there is conflation between Self and self. . . Of course at deeper levels, Self = self - yet I think that is a very big jump. Ime and what I’ve observed in others, it is helpful to first realize a distinction between Self and self. Not an intellectual distinction - a direct experience/realization/integration/embodiment distinction. . . With maturity, interconnections between the two arise and well as the merging as One.

It’s amazing how deep the human mind’s desire to determine right or wrong goes. To this end, the mind must create opposites and contradictions, which it finds intolerable.

Yes, this is were it gets tricky and thorny. And I can see how this appears. I spent many years immersed in evidence and rationale thinking. I loved watching the Atheist Experience, Street Epistemology and debates in which a rationale mind used evidence, logic and reason to overpower an irrational mind based on blind faith. A couple things I’ve learned. . . Transcendence is not one over another. It is not rejecting one for another, it is incorporation. For example, if we climb to a mountain top and look down on the city, we see the whole city. All the buildings, people, animals, trash etc. We see everything and nothing is rejected. Similarly, a view transcendent to logic does not accept faith rather than logic - it includes both. Rather than “Faith transcends evidence”, I think it would be more accurate to say “ISness is prior to evidence”. Notice how “Faith transcends evidence” is a contextualization, followed by a whole dogma of contextualization. We know bring in ideas of god, spiritual literature, morality etc. . . . Yet I would say “ISness is prior to evidence” is different. Here there is no more contextualization after the statement. ISness is what ISness is. It’s Everything / Nothing. That’s it. . . . Technically. . .evidence, proof, argumentation, thought stories etc are all within what IS. In this respect, a mind engaged in logical concept construction is no different than a mind engaged in classical music. They are both the ISness of Now. A transcendent view can see this, yet some minds are contracted within the thought constructs and become immersed within the thought stories that their reality and identification becomes the thought stories - and there can be immense attachment and desire to thoughts and beliefs because for the survival of a self construct and a sense of grounding.

@SoonHei Yea, the running and car combo is great. I cycle a lot in rural farm country. The bicycle and tractor combo is amazing. It’s not just a polite courtesy smile / wave. There is something deeper. It’s like two worlds crossing and we share humanness. It’s a moment transcendent to cyclist or farmer. There have been moments in which nothing mattered but that one shared moment. It’s hard to describe how beautiful it can be when it is spontaneous, genuine and free. It can be a reflection of myself and how I interact with the world. Simple things like how genuine I am, various essences of joy, humor, love, kindness - expressed through a window that lasts a moment, yet also an eternity.

I totally agree. I never considered my self creative or imaginative. I would have said they were my deficiencies. Yet with consciousness work, all sorts of creative and imaginative doors open. Rather than a glitch, perhaps this is a feature of consciousness work. To proceed through the gates, a mind must become more creative and imaginative. . .

I think your idea could make a pretty cool movie ?

@Harikrishnan There was a lot of concern in the U.S. during the 1990s and into 2000’s about potential negative impacts of rearing children in a same-sex household. And not just anti-LGBTQ people. There were people that were ok with others being homosexual, yet didn’t know if a child raised in a same-sex household would have any negative impacts. There have been many conservative groups that have tried to get social science studies to show such harmful impacts and nothing has come out of it. A few of my students were raised in same-sex households and are fine. Students routinely come to me with their problems. These are most often anxiety disorders and also learning blocks. Often, personal problems come out such as past trauma, drug or alcohol addictions, depression and various mental instabilities. I’ve also worked with at-risk teens in my community. However, I am not professionally trained as a social psychologist, social researcher or family counselor - these are not my areas of expertise. In terms of Their childhood upbringing, I would say the most common challenge is young adults feeling like they can’t express themselves. Quite often due to values that were imposed upon them about what it means to be a man, to be a woman, to be successful or to be of value. This was imposed upon them by their parents and society. I routinely meet students that are going into careers due to pressure from their parents. Their heart is in art, music, working with children - yet parental pressure says you must be a doctor, lawyer, businessman. Or students questioning their sexuality/gender and scared about coming out and exploring. In particular, backlash from their parents and peers. . . . As well, the conditioning of what “normal” is and not being “good enough”. So many young adults have anxiety and neuroses that stem from feeling they are “abnormal”, “there is something wrong with me”, or “not _____ enough”. Not smart enough, not good looking enough, not popular enough. . .there are hundreds of variations of not being good enough. As well, I commonly see neuroses due to various traumas and abuse from childhood. If I was to make a list of ways we can increase the health of children and young adults, same-sex or opposite-sex households wouldn’t even make my top 50. It would be somewhere around whether it’s better to have a family dog or cat as a pet. From my view, there are so many more important things such as: Does the family have resources to meet basic needs? Do the parents spend quality time with the child? Do they parents provide a safe space for the child to develop and explore their interests? (Or are the parents constantly judging and hyper-criticizing the child?). Is there excessive anger, screaming, domestic violence, drug and alcohol use in the family. Are parents spending quality time with the child and encouraging them to grow? Are the parents helping the child with their homework? I could go on and on. . . None of these are inherent to the sexual orientation of the parents. There can be an unhealthy same-sex household or an unhealthy opposite-sex household. At a Blue level, there will be a lot of resistance regarding the morality of same-sex partners and how this immorality can affect the children. As well, Blue likes a traditional patriarchal family structure and there will be concerns about whether same-sex households will disrupt traditional family structure and the fabric of society. For example, how can a boy grow up to be a “real man” with two mothers and no father?. . . At an orange level, it becomes more about individual freedoms and science. A blue society would be more about what is right in the eyes of god or tradition. An orange society would be more concerned about individuals pursuing what they find rewarding as well as social science. For example, an orange society would perform a lot of social science studies of children reared in opposite-sex vs. same-sex households to see if there are any significant wellness differences.

A few thoughts from yesterdays nature walk: 1. I’m debating whether to have a small journal and write things down. Or perhaps I can record it in my phone. The downside is it would break the flow. However, my mind becomes so fluid that there are no handles and things slip away. Almost like waking up from sleeping - I can’t recall and retain everything. Like a dream, the appearances seem clear at first and I’m like “Oh, I’ll remember this later. For now, I want to flow with it”. Then it dissolves away. This aspect of creativity is new for me. For those that are creative artists. . .when you get in “the zone”, do you ever lose it If you don’t express it right then? Like with artwork, music or creative writing. Are you ever out somewhere, perhaps in nature and creative appearances arise almost like dream images, yet you can’t actually write it down or express it in that moment? Or trying to capture it would break the flow. What do you do? 2. Well it’s almost embarrassing how little I was able to retain. It was one of my deepest explorations during hours of hiking, yet now I feel like I only have a few fragmented scraps I retained. . . But at least I have something. . . I’ll add on more later if I can recall. . . Imagine the following thought flow. . . “What is the name of that small country in Peru? It’s near the Galápagos Islands. I think it starts with an E’. . . “Ecuador?”. . . “Yes, that’s it! Ecuador!” Most minds would create an imagination of two people. One person is trying to remember the name of a country and the other person helps out, by saying their guess. . . Yet notice how I didn’t tell you if the thought flow was between two minds or within one mind. Imagine the thought flow happened between two people. Now imagine the thought flow happened within one person. These have very different essences. They feel different. It is a different relationship “I” have with the thought stream. The mind creates this. The mind creates this separation, this allows “me” to have an experience between “me” and “not me”. . . Yet what comes prior to the categorization of “my thoughts” and “your thoughts”? There is simply thoughts arising with no owner. There is simply the appearance of “What’s the name of that country?” . . . “Ecuador?”. . . “Yes, that’s it!”. . . This is a very different way of relating to reality. 3. I’m bummed that this was the only fragment I retained. This was actually the first appearance during the hike. I remember losing this one as my mind became lost. There were about 3 different streams that were lost. Then I backtracked to the last thing I could remember and recalled all three streams. I thought this meant it would go into long term memory, yet now it’s lost. Perhaps I will meditate and work my way from the beginning and see if I can recall anything. It is eerily similar to trying to recall dream fragments. This is one reason I call it lucid dreaming while awake. 4. I picked up another fragment. There was a moment in which the essence of kindness was revealed. A pure kindness that collapse into absolute love. It’s hard to explain, because it wasn’t an intellectual thing. There was clarity about clean, pure kindness as well as contrast to contracted forms of kindness. For example, acting kind out of self interest or being kind within a particular social group of like-minded people. It was so clear and obvious how contracted this form of relative kindness is, yet is the kindness nearly all minds are contracted within. . . One image that arose was a young man complaining about how being a “nice guy” won’t get him dates or a gf. This isn’t kindness. And then relative, self-centered kindness collapsed and absolute kindness appeared. Unconditional kindness for everything. A person, an ant, a tree, the wind, sun and rain. Kindness to everything. Yet this was untenable and collapse into absolute love. I remember trying to draw a distinction between unconditional kindness and unconditional love and was unable to do so.