Recursoinominado

First, congratulations for your success. I only want to point out a blind spot yours: don't wait for anything to have a bit internal shift, it is all excuses, I have been there, realized that it doesn't not make sense, if you get enlightened, you will accomplish what you want with ease and if you lose interest after enlightment (which I doubt, "after enlightment, cut wood, carry water"), it wasn't important in the first place. Don't hold anything back, it's perfectly safe.

I SUCK at taking notes and using it to get a proper understand of the subject, part is laziness and part is just that i don't know how to do this process effectively, Leo could do a video about it. Some material suggestions would be nice.

Is this fear of Truth? Fuck, i noticed that i am on this spiritual path but constantly pressing the breaks when the water gets knees deep. For instance, i acquired DMT almost a year ago and never had the balls to going for a breakthrough, twice i tried and stopped halfway in because i was afraid. I keep bitching about how i live in Brazil and it is so hard to find some quality psychedelic, while i have some DMT on my room and i can use it whenever i want. I think i fear going crazy or something, i have lots of cases in my family although i consider myself resilient and can handle a lot and i have a hint about how deep this reality investigation goes. Would love some advice with this issue...

Is taking away all the concept, ideas, beliefs. All of them fuck up our perception of reality. One by one we release them, as we lose what is false, the Truth appears naturally.

Psychedelics give you access to raw reality, they cut to most if not all bullshit and concepts, depending on the drug and dosage. It is a spiritual experience, most people just don't have the wisdom to recognize as so. DMT was an example, but I could said about my formal meditation practice that I practically stopped because when I do practice, it stir up so much stuff that is hard to handle (lists of fear, anxiety, worry, doubt, confusion during the days that follow it). I could also go to more retreats or actually apply at least some of the techniques I learn in my research. This is due to fear, I say that I want to reach enlightment but when stuff get rough, I stop with lots of excuses.

@Jack River Man, there is a LOT that i need to realize yet, i just learned this. @lmfao ahahaha LOL you are right @Serotoninluv I find that too, the two or three times i used DMT sub-breakthrough was rough as fuck, lots of fear, i had some realizations about reality because of how radically the perception is altered, is shocking and i fear what more there is.

How this "I" knows it is going to die if a psychedelic is consumed, for example? "It" knows the Truth? This "I", deep down, knows that it is false?

I have this experience too. I am addicted to weed and the biggest problem is that weed does give me great insights, it's almost guaranteed BUT, as you said, if i smoke frequently, the trip gets less and less valuable and more "low consciousness". It's a tough addiction for me because of this, on one hand, it gets out of control pretty quickly (smoke everyday, eat junk food, decreases sleep quality, brain fog, adhd symptoms, anxiety), but on the other hand, it was crucial for me at several moments in my life that i was struggling with some problem and i smoke it and had a big insight. I am experimenting with it in order to not gave in to cravings and cycle it like use it once a week or something like this.

This sounds like the kind of thing that really makes living worth, I envy you, I don't have the courage to buy it living in Brazil, damn it. Above all, congratulations for your persistence, I know how hard is to fight the resistance for using a hard psychedelic, I brought regular DMT almost a year ago and never had the guts to go all the way.

Listened Roger Waters playing this epic song in a concert two days ago, marvelous experience.

I am rewatching Leo's videos about enlightenment to have a better grasp of it and in his first FAQ video he said that we have no free will because there is no "we/i" doing anything. Ok, i get it, but i am having trouble grasping and swallowing this bitter pill. 1. This means that in fact the "i" we think we are can't do anything at all? We are just watching some movie that we think we are inside moving the character but we aren't? 2. IF the is no "i" to do anything, who is having insights and making decisions, plans, meditations, doing self-inquiry and reaching enlightenment? 3. Leo said in the video that if we realize this Truth, we would see the whole game and transcend it but dropping all neurotic worries and attachments, which would reflect on our actions (making better choices, being more loving etc). How does this work? 4. How can we change any behavior at all? What does it mean to self-development if there is no one to control our actions and pursue enlightenment? 5. If in fact "we" are consciousness(god, reality, existence) itself, why can't i feel anything outside the skin of this body? Why i don't feel what other people feel or see what other people see? There are some good books or material about this subject? Please don't answer with "who is asking?" or "there is no "i"" or something like this, i get this but i would like some elaboration about it.

Awesome trip and insights! I have to look into this Bufo Alvarius ceremony, but couldn't find where these ceremonies are taking place.

@How to be wise Thank you for your answers, for sure i am making a lot of assumptions (which are only thought), i think it bothers me that the "i" i think i am never done shit. I often see your recommendation of The Work by Bryon Kate, i listened to the audiobook but never really did the work, you have some tips or a workbook that i can start without having to read the whole book? @Mu_ I love Alan Watts! Although i already knew about all those ideas, i never had a genuine grasp, experientially, but i see some of the depth of it and a motivation is growing in me to inquire about it. This concept of thoughts just arising is mind-blowing. @Serotoninluv This is kind of exciting, i am on this path for a few years and it is really a spiral, you come back to old ideas only to dive deeper and grasp more of it and i am seeing how i am being led to investigate enlightenment, contemplation, free will, thoughts etc. @Arkandeus That's deep, fuck. @Misagh What you said about the heart beating is a good analogy, in fact, most of the time, i don't feel my heart beating but it is. I would love some further explanation. @Shiva I understand this, my goal here is to grasp the depth of this topic to motivate myself in its investigation (direct experience). I am into spirituality for some time but only a couple of weeks ago i am starting to grasp the importance of self-inquiry and contemplation.

Brazil have a large population of extremely poor people when Lula was elected in 2002, hundreds of people (including children) died of hunger every single day, he was the first one to try to help those people and succeeded elevating millions above this situation and made a good govern overall. The thing is, he is no saint, although he helped millions (making he extremely popular), his political party (in which he was the leader to this day) is known to be extremely corrupt with lots of scandals for years on end and refuse to accept any blame. This made the other half of the Brazils population(mostly right wings, white middle class and rich people, mostly blue with some red) HATE him and his political party and vote for anyone who poses against it. So, in resume, Lula helped millions but, in my opinion, isn't a saint but, in fact, probably corrupt and power thirst as fuck(orange with some green). The thing is, this led to the rising of Bolsonaro(blue with some red), a dumb incompetent, racist, homophobic, military, angry, aggressive politician who says that "the minorities should bend over to the majority" which poses as a "new solution" to the heavy systemic corruption that we see in Brazil. Bolsonaro gave voice to those racist angry right wings who before would kept their prejudices to themselves, today they scream that gays will be killed and stuff like that. Its a bit scary to be honest, there are reports of gays, women, poor people and everyone that isn't in favor of Bolsonaro being attacked and even killed by his followers all over the country.

Brazilian here. Bolsonaro is red/blue, as most of Brazil population (this fact was exposed by the unstoppable rising of bolsonaro). It is a extreme reaction to green ideals, we are living in dangerous times, seriously considering in packing my things and try my luck at some better place, Brazil is much more fucked up that I imagined (and I wasn't optimistic before) , we are going to pass through some rough times before we evolve as a collective ego to at least orange/green(could take hundreds of years).

The addictive potential of weed is no joke, speaking from personal experience.

I had a HUGE ego backlash when it was over, spent months gorging in unhealthy habits, foods, drugs, couldn't meditate at all. Today i understand that i probably had a kundalini awakening there which forced my third eye to open way before my other chakras making me ungrounded as fuck (i was spacey, confused, full of anger, anxiety). Took me a year to learn what just happened because nobody could explain to me why i felt worse after the retreat and all advice i receive was "keep meditating" which i couldn't because it made the symptoms worse every time i tried. BUT, i highly recommend it, its a giant challenge, i had a glimpse of how fucked i was once i was stripped of all distractions and "forced" to meditate 10h a day for 10 days. It was hardcore to say the least. Later i went back as a server to work in the kitchen for another 10-days retreat and i plan to sit in another one next year.

This is beautiful, really close to my dmt trips.

Can be pretty intense, i had a number of weed trips that were harder to handle than LSD or mushrooms. I am in favor of weed but do not underestimate its potency.

Yes, it's a potent experience. Surrender, surrender, surrender, relax all your body, send love to the painful parts. When I did 4.5g of mushrooms, I practiced the above and had a Insight about surrender and relaxation = one with the flow of live and divine intelligence. When I feel a pain in some part of my body I just surrender and it usually desapears, especially when I feel back pains (those are mostly excess of kundalini energy in some blocked area). Lots of healing and insights comes naturally from this.

As my awareness expands, i am seeing more and more that i am full of shit. My shadow side runs my life and i just cover it with a spiritual, nice persona. As i go deeper in my path, i feel that i am feeling "worse" than before, although i occasionally have some blissful moments. Maybe it isn't the "same" feelings, maybe are deeper ones, my worst fears now, that's why it seems worse. This feeling is similar to the one i felt on the worst times of my life and decided to do something about it pursuing self-development (i was kind of successful with making friends, working out, picking up girls and only discovered spirituality several years later). I am trying to handle as best as i can, i consider myself as a relatively stable person (even tough i deal with fucked up shit al the time in my family situation) but sometimes i have doubts that i am going to succeed and feel hopelessness until i start doubting if i am not going to go insane if i go deeper. The thing is, this process is being done by itself, i have little to NO control over, i am really not doing formal spiritual practices but i have a contemplative mind, especially under psychedelics. Maybe it's what they call Dark Night of the Soul, i am afraid that is taking way to long that i can handle and is getting worse every day (at least is my subjective experience in my body).

This sounds awesome! Happy for you with a hint of envy lol Now i am motivated to practice self-inquiry. Tell us more about your experience, are you still feeling something? You can still "see" your realizations?

@lmfao That's a good reminder, rough nonetheless to keep a positive mindset amidst all the turmoil. @Outer I need to self-inquiry more, only do it when i remember throughout the day. But i notice that when i do it, i am instantly present. @PsiloPutty That's also a nice reminder, i will keep in mind that it's the healing taking place. @SgtPepper I am guilty of using my mind too much on this path but it also made me aware of everything i am.

Serious truth bombs, Leo delivering golden insights for free. I highly appreciate your work, @Leo Gura. Even best is how you make the effort to warn us about the trap of idealizing you (or anyone else), but do the work and experience for ourselves. Just realized that i am way less serious about enlightenment that i thought, i was thinking that i was special and somehow would eventually reach the goal spontaneously, not by being strategic about my spiritual growth like making myself meditate every day no matter the costs or read books for hours, taking notes and contemplating about it. Dedication and discipline IS a consequence of our love for something.