Igor82

@Preety_India You'd have to elaborate on that. My certainty of this possibility comes from the book Psycho-Cybernetics, and the scientific concepts of stem-cells and Telomeres, and also some more concepts, Also from the vast experience I have from self-experimenting with health to actually find very efficient and optimal ways to feel healthy. I regard my "delusions" as grounded in direct experience.

Perfect. Imperfect. You think that death is inevitable and certain, Yet you say "Don't think of the inevitable". What if you'd think that living forever is a guarantee?

@Enlightenment Yep. Denying decay and death. Yet if it's entirely physically possible for our bodies to live forever, with stem-cell and telomere technology, with keeping the body clean and vigorous, why not be open-minded and try to build on top of this possibility? Somehow, I mean come on, wouldn't it be nice to live forever? I have heard from a guy whom I talked to while I was tripping on LSD, that we can literally command our bodies through positive imagination (with love & faith) to perform certain functions for us. Why can't the body then just lengthen the telomeres, I mean, it must be possible?

I think that positive imagination is a very effective way to change habits. And building small habits of love are the baby steps required for positive imagination to fuel itself Like dude, is it really possible to us to merge with god through a path of positive imagination? I think so! Indirectly through habits so to speak

@Vibroverse Haha, yeah... I think that a strong heart-based mission is closely linked to enlightenment as one loves the dream fearlessly when one sees the dream as a dream. Which melts away the boundaries of what the dream can imagine into reality. So, a heart-based mission melts away fearful boundaries, having human consciousness adapt more into love, seeing more love, unifying dualities. I think the path of life purpose is a legitimate way towards enlightenment. I used to think that "life purpose strengthens the ego making it bigger", but what I didn't see there was how fearless love equals union, and how loving imagination (life purpose vision) opens up a portal of adapting the human lifestyle into fearless love. If the mission is big enough, it requires one to see love in everything.

Yo, be careful with how you use your wordings. I think consciousness WILL be mainstreamed, craving masters of consciousness to skillfully DEAL with the projection of guilt, through the use of creativity and authentic embodiment. NEVER believe that consciousness can't be mainstreamed. You see, it limits your options of creative mastery.

@Brittany Thank you, that's a beautiful response. I guess the more we identify with the ego (beliefs boundaries, etc), the more likely we are to feel negative emotions as it's unavoidable if other people around you also are identified with their ego's. I guess the only ones who can get away with feeling more of the "power", and less of the negative emotions when it comes to identifying with the ego, are the people who would be in total control over a situation which makes them perceive themselves as the most powerful around. Gosh, people can SUFFER. Thank you for adding ownership to the equation. I am jealous of other people owning cool experiences... I also wanna own cool experiences. I want to experience stuff, put stuff into memory. I don't know why I want that. I don't feel like I need it, but I want it. Who do we want to own different parts of reality?

Mechanics of Jealousy (Not Jealousy as in sexuality) Preface: I Sat down to visualize, then I got calling to smoke some weed. Before I smoked the weed, I took a conscious decision to do it, meaning I went through the consequences and my intentions. I wanted to experience the difference in visualization when high on weed or not. I also had a quarter of modafinil in the morning. I started visualizing about my ex, and of the particular incidents of when I jealous of her as she told me of something I interpreted as her having achieved (she specifically told me of a spiritual experience of hers. I investigated the memory I had of what I thought about and how I felt in that moment and based on that, I went to write about my insights, and here they are. So, please add to this or correct me if I'm wrong. Jealousy is all about what the ego wants. Longing would be there if it would be a true need, but when it comes to wants, Jealousy is felt when another person has what you desperately want. If you didn't need or want what the person has, and you love the other person, you will feel either celebratory emotions or pride or both. When the ego wants something, it gets jealous if another person has it, but to have the jealousy survive, it has to be unconscious. It's made unconscious using projection. Using projection means that you'd never think you are creating your own jealousy, that your jealousy is untenable, but you will rather think that your jealousy is out there in the world Jealousy is quite limiting. If we are jealousy, we are also unconfident in our abilities and path towards what we want. We are also in a need for love, which manifests itself in egoic wants. Jealousy = Need for love & self-esteem. Jealousy survives using projection because projection makes jealousy more tenable. Self-esteem is what determines how aware you are of your true needs, if you are unaware of your true needs, it's much easier for jealousy to become tenable - because of the lack of a true reference point (of what your true needs are) to limit the self-deception potential - a lack of security which allows for more reasons for projection to pass. The more jealous, the more unaware you are of your true needs, thus the more insecure you are about fulfilling them. The more you are jealous, the less capable you are of having/getting love for yourself. Jealousy indicates to you what you want, investigate what you want, and discover what you truly need. Getting Jealous of other people's success entails that you want success as a way to fulfill an underlying need, entailing that you are unconscious of why you truly want success. You "needing" success means that you are unconfident in your own abilities to meet your own needs (?). What you truly need is always, and only, love; and its more direct forms. If you keep experiencing jealousy, it means that you have not made the jealousy go away by either: Fulfilling your wants Fulfilling your needs Being on conscious track of fulfilling your own needs Being conscious enough to see the mechanics of jealousy and its untenableness. Combinations of above You can become conscious enough to see how your own jealousy works, and see that you are fabricating your own jealousy, making yourself feel bad. This makes the jealousy untenable and so it disappears. The opposite to this is to be unconscious of how untenable jealousy is, as you project the jealousy in the successful attempt of making it credible, "out there", "solid", and valid. So, by overview, if you are feeling jealous, you have unmet needs of love which you are unconscious of having as you veil them with wants (attempting to formalizing your needs and shaping them according to your web of beliefs), this entails that you are insecure about meeting your needs & wants because you have not found a way to fulfill them yet! You are also not seeing through the jealousy to regard it as self-fabricated, so you are most probably projecting your jealousy onto others, This is one example of why consciousness = Love. And jealousy = a selfish, unconscious emotion - in the emotional spectrum of selfishness & unconsciousness vs selflessness & consciousness. For Jealousy to exist, a certain amount of self-deception has to exist as well. The emotion of longing lies in between of these, where longing occurs if you regard your wants as accurate to your true needs and, that you are confident in them being achievable for you, but you have yet to fulfill these needs, and the mechanics below triggers the emotion for you. The highest form of jealousy is pride (for another). The emotions "getting higher" the more consciousness and love is mixed into the situation triggering either of these emotions of pride and jealousy; Where the basis of a situation structurally includes: Trigger: Someone else whom you relate to, which has accomplished something you regard as positive and something to be had.

Mister. One of the biggest insights for me when it comes to making my day game (hooking girls) much more fun is to just hang out with them. So, having the intention to get laid, and to give off that vibe actually limits you unless you can hide it. Best thing is to solve it so much as possible external of getting laid: sexual energy transmutation, nofap, good social life, exercise, goals, etc. It seems to be very attractive for women to have a man talk to her, giving off a vibe to her that he doesn't need her, he wants to see if he wants her, and he is chill, content, and opposite to desperate. Many men on tinder give of the vibe of being desperate. It repels many women. I don't think that quality women would spend time watching their phones and swiping through pictures of desperate men. I don't think you would prefer swiping through images of women while sitting home at your couch, over, being out there and approaching the hottest girls on the street; just having fun, just relaxing and chatting with some hotties. You even got the sun shining there! Cmon, get out there!

That is some good stuff. Really good content for visualization. Holy hell. New insight I got from this: Be chill, don't give too much attention, and hang out with her. Just talk to her. I wanna do more of this, actually gives a good self-image and would be quite relaxing. Talking to girls... hot girls James is awesome, feeds that imagination.

Imagine walking up to a hot woman, without fear. Your belly tell you that you should walk up to her, interrupt her as she is talking with her friend, and tell her that you think she is hot and that you would like to get to know her (). Fucking imagine being a superconductor of your divine playfulness, whitty as if you had direct access to a library of whit. The thing with matching your lack of fear, with whatever you authentically want to do, out there on the streets, with hot girls all around you, for me, is to keep listening to that inner voice that tells me what I want to do, and just to do it. Just do it. Over time, the brain rewires, and there you are, standing there with a girl, looking her deeply in her eyes, feeling her heart, making her wet. Visualize this! Actually visualizing this helps. Visualize yourself walking up to girls in scenarios which are just unacceptable, such as her sitting with her family in a restaurant, and you just walking into that restaurant, taking a chair, sitting down beside her and telling her that she is hot and that you would like to get to know her. If visualizing this makes you nervous, GOOD!! Rewire that brain.

@Nahm Amazing reply, amazing!

Wow man, you are touching upon the highest artist within me! Embracing emotions! That feels good, it fills me with warmth to hear you say that. What I meant with "no emotions" is that kind of poetry that would emerge from beyond emotions (in some way? Universal light?) And I have yet to get to know that. And man, I can definitely see how that kind of stuff could spark awakenings. I believe that its completely possible to spark awakening experiences for people using symbolism and sound, targeting their highest selves to join, boosted by psychedelics/meditation. I fucking love thinking about that! The hardest part is just putting it into action... Getting there! You are awesome too!

Thank you for your tips. I will definitely integrate the pages into my bookmarks and language. I feel like this is a long-term investment and upping my language skills is like upping posture. It changes my life. I do some breathwork (wim hof 3 rounds) almost daily nowadays, but I'm yet to combine it with art and creativity, although I try to combine it with visualization, I can relate to being stuck on a word though. How I solve that is to time my writing to when I really feel like writing, like when a volcano feels to erupt. Suddenly, I just sit down, and instead of journaling about my emotions, I put them into poetry. Although I'm yet to find a way to write poetry that is not emotionally driven, I'm yet to create a structure like a story, I might get inspired to do so when I read your Journeys Beyond Earth. So I'm waiting to see this in action.

@SirVladimir Thank you for your texts, I just read the one you posted (although without following instructions), and I really liked it, and I really respect that you want people to read this under the affect of a psychedelic and after meditation. It seems to me as serious love! I want to share with you this poem, do you like it? Im really proud of it and I think I managed to guide the reader in a good way.

Hello Leo! Congratz! What is your life purpose statement? How has it morphed from the beginning of actualized.org up until now? How long did the longest intimate relationship you had with a girl last, and why did you break up if you did? Please describe one or more of the top sexual experiences you have had with a girl Do you currently have any other creative/artistic pursuits/interests? What are your top 10 values?

Forewords: I have found that plugging 5-MeO-DMT oxalate required alot more substance for me to feel any effects from it. I plugged 35mg's. My set and setting was really good, I did my morning routine and I wanted to keep on with my day until I found myself in the perfect setting to trip on 5-MeO, so I took the opportunity and I dont regret doing that. Even though I felt like I was supposed to do stuff, and I felt like "My ego was active and big", it didnt turn out to be a hindrance. I fasted for 36 hours prior to the experience (initially for health reasons). I got okay with the fact that I was gonna die, and I felt excited for my death. I was full of energy, while I grounded up the 5-MeO and dissolved into the water. After administration, I went and laid down comfortably on my bed with my limbs extended, opening myself up for any experience. I felt fear during the comeup, and it really stung in my butt, I surrendered into the sensations. My heart started to pump faster Suddenly, my awareness just shifted, and went up 10x to a peak meditative state, and this made me much more aware of my body and the body load. That made me start breathing more heavily and I felt just a little terror and fear coming up. I surrendered. I did also have some thoughts of like "this is it his is what I wanted" I felt satisfied with the level of awareness I experienced, but now after the trip I can definitely assure that this awareness could have gone much higher in terms of satisfaction. I suddenly calmed down, and 15 minutes into it, the pain the my butt was subsided, all fear was gone, along with the heavy breathing and pumping heart. I was left with this surge of awareness, where I was constantly aware of all that was happening, I got aware of all the thoughts that came up. I felt a little more connected to everything, but there were no non-duality or ego death. The ego was definitely there, and it throwed me a very very compelling urge to jerk off, and so I did, while being very aware of it. The orgasm was so laughably different than what the craving displayed that I got this sense of liberation, which caused me to have amazing surge of masculine energy, I felt like I could do anything; I could plug another 60mg's, I could go run a marathon, lift a mountain etc. This masculine energy probably came from an inner liberation that I sensed as I got this feeling of certainty that this craving will never be able to seduce me ever again! I felt very liberated that even though im struggling with nofap, and this relapse would make me feel guilty, I actually felt good, like "This was worth the experience, and why thehell should I cry over spilled milk? Lets move on with life!!" I felt alive like never before, but this energy was not satisfying by any means, it was more like "I could do anything on order to get something, so by definition, the energy would not satisfy me. I tried surrendering, I attempted meditation and self-inqury during the peak (I was fully able to move around, dont get me wrong), and I would have gone pretty deep unless I had this impatience to go do something, to release my energy, I ended up satisfying my hunger for food by eating a couple of pineapples. Insights: Taking care of the body is paramount, paramount in how you will feel in the body and what kinds of thoughts will be thrown at you. If the body is not properly taken care of, then doing personal development would be like trying to stop a flood with a towell. If the body is in its peak state, trancendence of the body will be much easier (This is counter-intuitive) The key to release an addiction is to not think about it! If you think, crave it or fantasize about it, then you will attract it. When a thought of the addiction arises, sit with the thought, permeate it with your awareness until it disappears, but also make sure that you have your mind and thoughts directed at something elise! If you will have 10k thoughts arise during your day and you're a heroin addict, it would be much more beneficial for you to direct your resources at something thats worth working for, rather than just sitting on a couch and having all those thoughts be unavoidably focused on your addiction, as your not doing anything anyways. Its much easier to get rid of an addiction if what you are thinking about is actually not the addiction, rather how to live the best life possible. Permeate your thoughts with your purpose (by taking action on it!) while also letting go of thinking about your addiction until you wont have a single thought about the addiction anymore, and only then, it is transcended. Yes, you can sit on the couch and let go of every single thought until there is no thought left = the addiction is gone, or; You can permeate whatever thoughts you have with the purpose of authentic eudaemonia rather than hedonism, so that you stop thinking about your addiction = the addiction is gone. Summary: This experience was very beneficial, and I feel like I know the proper set and setting, the proper mindset and the proper way to surrender. Plugging was indeed very very smooth, I have now a new sense of how alive I can feel if I just think differently about life, and next time I will administer 45mg's the same way, expecting terror torture and death.

I am a teenager using psychedelics for personal growth. We just have to begin with grasping the theory of psychedelics (dangers, safety, potentials and expectations), then we can start out with low doses with a clear intention of using it for personal growth. If it works well, we up the dosages slowly to explore within our zone, and then it becomes apparent what we need to work on, thus, personal growth. A teenager could work his way up to taking normal doses of LSD and use it for contemplating his traumas or existential questions. And this gives some good results! This way, the unexperienced could build himself up to the bigger psychedelics like 5-MeO, by integrating baby doses of the other psychedelics. The turtle wins the race, but he gotta start somewhere. So, I think that if teenagers have the proper theoretical foundation before trying psychedelics, and the proper attitude for them, then they can do it for sure. But of course, most teenagers would not do this, even if we gave them the knowledge. I think teenagers could and should start with psychedelics with a responsible attitude, sufficient knowledge, and baby right dosages starting out, slowly ramping up. The attitude should be to uncover all the shit within, aiming at self-actualization, but taking it very slow. If a teenager would be able to truly have that kind of attitude, then I think he should take that psychedelic. Problem is, most teenagers won't have that attitude, so they shouldn't take the psychedelics.

Oh, music has such potential. If only we could fuse this kind of art with self-actualization. I think this is the next step for actualized.org stuff, to transcend language as a way of communicating the understanding of these high-level teachings, and to fuse epistemology, psychology, and art in a way that really gets this stuff into people's heads! Think of including our learning mechanism, our intuition, our preferences for beauty, our sexual energy, our imagination, all of these, into a piece of art. It would put the same kind of message that Leo tries to express in 2 hours, into something as long as 3 minutes. You'd have to be a master manipulator as well. We have people at the top using manipulation in such masterful ways, not at all valuing consciousness and self-actualization. Let's turn that around, inside out.

Diet/health should be simple, not complicated, just like life. You simply get hungry, eat until you are satisfied. Our bodies are made for that, right? Only later have we learned to farm stuff, mix stuff, and research stuff. It's like piano. We complicate piano so much, by researching how the geniuses have done it, and then we fall into the trap of trying to replicate the "genius" through music theory, but we never ask ourselves how the geniuses did prior to our analysis of them. And playing piano is pretty simple. Its all about learning how to play a piece, which you can create while you learn it, so you slowly build it up while modifying it to your preferences, re-learning it, filling it with your love, and thus basing your finger technique on that love, and becoming better and reaching mastery this way! Modern pianists forget the creative part, hence much of the love part - they miss out on the feeling of raising a child. Diet is just like this. We don't have to analyze it if it would come naturally to us, unfortunately, we have to adopt a shield of knowledge against all the unnatural stuff out there, but we must retain the nature of diet! If you would live in nature, what would you eat? If there was no modification to your knowledge and your natural habitat, what would you eat? The stuff that grows on trees! And the stuff that doesn't taste bitter, stuff that you don't have to make a fire for, etc. I'm not trying to impose something on you, just think simple, simple as hunger - eat - satisfied. Some autoimmune disorders come from unnatural childbirth, such as cesarean, because the child won't get enough bacteria from the normal way out to build a proper immune system. The natural way is not to be completely sterile. The immune system can get out of whack the more unnatural and sterile our lives are. But we would never perform cesarean out in the jungle 50000 years ago. Just, how would you live prior to all the analysis on how we should live? It's simple, get more in touch with that. I think your disease could come from an unnatural way of living, in some way, from your part. Maybe you need more dirt in your life, maybe you need move more thus eat more calories, thus get more net nutrients, maybe you need to see nature every day, maybe you need a better posture - The research of "optimal health" is just a shield of knowledge against the modification of our own natural habitat. Maybe you did some wrong modifications, and this is quite complicated! Because lifestyle is very big.

Here is a poem I wrote after having watched a sunset, kind of stumbling upon it as I was wandering around looking for somebody - someone, anyone (a good looking girl) while in grief of the breakup with my ex.

Thank you in advance for reading the whole post It has been 3,5 years since I discovered personal development/L.e.o, (I was 14,5) and I have been lucky enough to live with my mom this time with barely any responsibilities. The initial goal was to build up a passive income, then the goals became to find my life purpose. Basic enlightenment work in there as well. This would be an extensive explanation of why you should do Leo's forgiveness video: I have recently gone through a relationship with a yoga teacher, this was my first relationship, and I was very confused. You know what I essentially did in that relationship? I abandoned almost all my goals, and subconsciously transmuted that energy of trying to achieve my goals - to be investing that energy into the relationship. Why? Well, what happened is that I have had a very angry father growing up, and he passed on so much of his anger onto me, so I became an angry child, trying to find the love I didn't get from my angry dad, in my girlfriend. And so I shaped her into my dad in my mind, I acted as if she was my dad, I focused on her as much as I wanted my dad's love, and as I didn't know how to handle this well of anger deep inside of me, I just reacted to fill the hole that it came from - lack of love from my dad. And this hole was what caused me to build these goals, based on just trying to fill that hole, and now she was there, so I abandoned the goals and started pursuing her. Anger, I assume is what Eckart Tolle calls "the pain-body". We can either observe it and not identify with it, but it is there for a reason. Eckhart Tolle's method of getting rid of anger is quite ineffective. Attributes of anger: When you become angry, you are anger. Anger don't listen, anger has a very egocentric vibe. Anger is very violent and destructive, anger LOVES to destroy. Anger is very energetic, anger is hurt, anger wants love. Anger saddens the heart when it sees how much destruction is made. Not expressing anger will make you fearful and depressed, as you build up your egoic patterns upon anger, you will start fearing to express your anger, and what anger hates the most is forgiveness. Forgiveness is love, understanding, becoming. For me, anger is such a hindrance, it hinders loving creativity, it creates monstrosities instead. It takes away enthusiasm, and really really slows down the works. My father is a musician, but he never got to release his amazing music because of anger, his unwillingness to forgive those who hurt him, and indeed, hurt him a lot. And so he is an alcoholic, mainly because of his fear and inability to love, thus forgive. Fear of love, its just anger. We are hurt and angry, we constantly hurt ourselves in this fucking hell we call life, and instead of forgiving, being wise and understanding, we react, and become the rage, fearing real love the most. If you want real love, you will have to forgive!! If just my dad forgave all those who hurt him, when they did hurt him, he would've saved 50 years of his time that he instead wasted being angry and destructive. We love anger. We fucking love expressing anger. It comes to the point where we can not distinguish between love and anger on the feeling level. And anger is subtle, we carry it around constantly, and we love expressing anger, but that makes us destructive. It equips us with such an energetic force, but also the attributes that anger has, and most tragically, it makes us afraid of love. I have built so many patterns on suppressing anger. Mainly social habits, perfectionism, addictions, fears, habits, ways of carrying myself, I mean, it goes deep. It feels like my ego has been built upon the suppressed anger that I have never expressed, and if I suppress anger, specifically anger, I have became DIRECTLY: sad, fearful, shameful, having low self-esteem, very selfish, and INDIRECTLY: Anxious, unproductive, unattractive, etc. What is the root of our problems is suppressed anger. We cannot suppress anxiety, fear, depression, shame, etc, but what we can suppress is anger. We do this by not forgiving, and not expressing our anger. Expressing anger and forgiving is very closely ties into each other, consider this: When you express your anger to another person, when you are honest about how the other person has caused you to be angry, that invites the other person to either express his anger onto you or to make you understand what was actually going on. After anger, we express what actually happened from our perspective, and we do this naturally from our heart, to make the other person forgive us!!! And so expressing anger means forgiveness, and we can only be angry at other people who hurt us, or things who hurt us. But eventually, we become angry at ourselves for hurting ourselves out of the anger we learned to suppress from others who hurt us. Forgive your parents. They were probably very angry. When it comes to dating and relationships, your anger as a man or woman is the no1 cause of your problems in the relationships. Because anger won't listen to the other person, etc. And as we have probably gotten our anger from the parents who hurt us, we will try to solve these problems in the relationship, because now love is there! And sorta the ego molds the other person into one of your parents, or both -and you become attracted to friends and partners who mimic your parent's behavior just so you can try to solve the problems with love-, and if I see my yoga teacher girlfriend as my dad, ill become the anger and resentment I have towards my dad, fused in with the love, and so I become in love with expressing my anger, and sometimes this -not in my case- could go to lengths where the guy would beat her up, because his suppressed anger felt like it. And girls get turned off by your suppressed anger, and whatever that means for you, because it means your inability to listen, care, love, be confident, happy, creative, etc. Are you a perfectionist? Perfectionism is rage at its finest!! (suppressed rage: passive-aggressiveness) Take a psychedelic. You become very childish, right? A child has no anger. And a psychedelic opens you up to love and forgiveness, and that is such a useful tool. If you would have no anger, you would be just like a child. Fearless in self-expression, but maybe much wiser as you're now grown up. In conclusion: Suppressing anger will make you sad, depressed, shameful, uptight, unattractive, uncreative, bitter, passive-aggressive, and unproductive. If you want to become less angry, forgiveness is key. Forgiving by understanding the person who hurt you so much that you ultimately become him, or as Leo said in his forgiveness video, recognize that person as yourself, and as universal love, and then there is nothing to forgive. An enlightened person recognizes this, but you can too!! Just forgive, be like Jesus :D. The end result is the melting away of your suppressed anger and whatever that makes you: Shameful, sad, unattractive, and replacing all of that with childish being of innocent love and creativity. And that is all you want. To forgive. To love. To understand. Your girl will love this, all girls will flock around you. Because now you don't have a need to get love based on anger, now you have filled that hole with love and understanding, being a well of love for the girl, handsome AF, a wise childish spirit of love. For me, it feels like these 3 years had lead up to me recognizing the power of forgiveness, and this really feels like the knee of the curve. It's all getting better from here. Book to read: Radical Honesty, by Brad Blanton. (Psychotherapy expert made a book on releasing anger to become more child-like, by using radical levels of honesty) Leo Video: How To Forgive Anyone Who Hurt You - A Powerful Trauma Release Exercise

@Roy @Username @Preety_India @IAmTheHolySpirit I just want to thank you guys for presenting your perspectives on this. After I read the last two posts there was so much pain within me, what Preety wrote was such a bitter pill to swallow, but it was true, and I cried for an hour, and HolySpirit just added to that. I came to the conclusion that my biggest hole in life is that I'm not filling myself with the passion, consciousness, and love that is within my arms-reach. I'm using the relationship as a distraction, and as I get dependent on her filling my cup, anything she does that threatens withdrawal of her love is met by negative emotions on my side, and so to defend my fear of filling myself with the love I can give myself, it all comes out on her. So, if my cup is filled with her love, I cannot fill it with my own, I will find every way to distract myself with her love. This was a co-dependent relationship as her cup got filled by my love as well, that's why it went on for so long. I had thought that I can use the relationship as a way to find this out by myself, and yes, it came to that. In the name of self-love, we broke up through a phone call... its funny, because self-love was our commitment from the very beginning. It's so hard, but I bet its rewarding: It's quite beautiful, as I feel more in control of how I give my love. Now I'm the one setting some boundaries for myself. I don't know, but I feel like sometime in the future, I will meet her again with more love than ever before. Maybe this is what it means to grow with each other for real.