B Clear

Hello all, I am new here and this is my first post. I have been working with the I Ching Oracle - the Wilhelm/Baynes version- as a means of self improvement for about 12 years and it has been a great influence on my life. I was wondering if anyone else here works with or studies the I Ching and had some any tips they discovered in working with it or compliments to it. I do also study the Toa Te Ching and have found that very complementary. I hope you are all having a great Saturday Morning if you are on this part of the globe or Friday evening if you are in the US B. Clear

I had extreme physical trauma done to me when I was young as well as witness many violent acts so I did go through periods of time where I can relate to how you have felt. My advice would be first of all to fully accept who you are, you spoke a lot about not wanting to be the way you were and not accepting this. You cannot move forward from the point where you are at, without accepting it first.. Be very careful at this point to not compare yourself to other 'normal' people. Comparison at such times can be deadly, and no one is 'normal'. Something that might sound strange to do now is to look for the interesting, beautiful, beneficial aspects of what your current state provides, and then spend some time observing those. One I can think of, is that you are able to tell us of a completely different perception of reality, which is something a lot of people here are interested in. Like the way you perceive time. Yes, it is different, it is strange but it is interesting too. Maybe there is a wisdom you can gain that we who do not perceive this way cannot. Look for it. And lastly, I really do recommend you find a therapist to talk to. Maybe not a psychologist who will diagnose you if that is not want you want, but maybe just an intelligent open minded (preferably enlightened) counselor you can talk to, share your thoughts with and receive some feedback. You are going through something significant and isolating as you try process could become too overwhelming. Just knowing you have someone to talk to, even if they are not there to cure of diagnose you, can make a world of a difference. <3 (*also only use my advice if it feels right to you*)

Nettle tea is excellent for fasting as it is filled with minerals and iron

I did it this morn and OMG it was so uncomfortable, I could barely stay under, but I'm going to keep at it. Thank you for the awesome post!

Joseph I have been doing the same. I aim for an hour but at 15 mins or 20 mins or 30mins. I feel like forcing myself will backfire on me as I always feel not great after when I do I am going through a lot in my life at the moment so I think that is why I am so restless. @The White Belt are you going through something big as well? Or maybe it's your excitement about your life purpose that is bringing all that energy.

Hi @RichardY I do not yet know much about NLP other than you are supposed to do different body movements and gestures so the programming is supposed to enter into the subconscious. So I am not yet sure how NLP and Snow White or the Magic Mirror are similar. But I did love your your article about Narcissim and found it quite interesting in the realm of how it applies to everyone and also since in my counselling practice I do often work with partners of pathological Narcissists and pathological Narcissists themselves those new perspective are ones I could think about and ponder and incorporate. I like how the mythological characters represent different archetypes within us, and how the author has interpreted them, and the warnings. I do not know much about Ayn Rand, recently I read something about her being someones lover and that relationship turning into hate because she was so self obsessed. I'm hesitant to delve too much into Freud, as I found him quite sex obsessed, but I will relook at his model. An agony aunt? What do you mean by that? I do have people I can correspond with, but I miss having family near by and a partner. I live on a beautiful rural property, its quite enchanting, but its so far from everyone, friends who travel do come and visit every once in a while which is nice, though after my last visit I missed my solitude once they were here, strangely. Oh and Theta healing is when you go into a meditative state and access Theta brainwaves then bring your client into that space and in that open receptive state begin removing unhealthy beliefs that bring harm. But I do believe in techniques that can enter into and reprogram the unconscious aspect of the self and I really want to start working with that as I try actualize through awareness and effot and hope I can get some guidance there.

Hello, So I have been working as counsellor for years and I have used some methods such as Theta Healing to reprogram conditioning in the subconscious mind when it seemed necessary. (Theta is putting oneself in a theta brainwave (through a type of meditation) which influences the person in ones presence to go there and then stating the removal or input of beliefs, feelings etc.) The funny (or maybe not so funny) thing is that I mostly only facilitated this for clients - hardly ever for myself - and it did work well for them. This is because I remembered as a teen how I would go to hypnotist shows and all my friends could get hypnotized but I could never. Which is sort of similar to what you do in theta - putting them in a sort of brainwave with meditative talk - so I assumed I was one of the few who could not be hypnotized, and I felt it was due to trust issues because in my early childhood I had been manipulated so much that I had later created a defense to suggestion when I was aware it was being directed to me But now in starting to try apply things to myself properly for the first time - since dedicately starting my personal journey towards self actualization - It is like Im brand new in this area though I have been studying it for years to use with clients. It may sound strange but I think Ive been this way due to past traumas and upbringing etc, as I for most of my life just saw myself as 'something' here to serve others. It is hard to explain but I will leave that for another post. Anyway I am listening to one of Bruce Liptons talks on reprogramming the subconscious mind. (He wrote the Biology of belief and has validated his methods with the use of an EEG machine recording the change in brainwaves). A friend sent it because I have been finding that whenever I have to sit down to do administrative work. For example, last night when I was filling out a mock application for a new business grant asking me all kinds of basic questions about what I was planning on selling, how I would market etc, I feel this massive resistance to sit and complete the written work. It feels like I am wading through thick tar, and there is a tension in my stomach and throat, and I feel very emotional and I suddenly start comfort eating and looking for distractions and then I cannot sit still and it takes an hour to complete something that should take 10 mins. It is exhausting! So, I often stop before I complete anything and then take weeks to get back to it fearing the memory of how bad it felt. As a teen I was diagnosed with Attention Deficit Disorder and mild dyslexia so I always just attributed it to that, but last night I decided to lay down and really feel and go into the feeling in my body and my emotions.. and oh my lord did it open up a can of worms, not only did every current pain I am experiencing, like my recent break up, my recent move across country and feeling overwhelmed and wanting to isolate, my feeling alone and vulnerable with all my family in another continent far away, my questioning if there is something wrong with me because I don't currently have enough income to support myself, and on and on, and this tidal wave of negative, fearful emotions and damaging thoughts, all sparked by looking at that feeling that comes up when I try make myself do something (mostly admin work) I think I should be doing or have to do when I'm not inspired like writing a business structure or an essay etc. As I looked deeper I realized this phrase my parents said over and over to me as child underlies alot of what I was feeling or why. Because I was very different to them, very sensitive and spiritual and I could not lie, they worried for my well being in the world which they thought cruel, deceptive and harsh because they had grown up in Warsaw during world war II and then through the Russian occupation for years after and had been programed with a hostile worldview in their formative years. So they often said to me "Bianca you will never survive in this world the way you are" "You should have been born a hundred years ago when the world was still a good place" So even though I know consciously that that is nonsense, I know as well that it was said enough times in the first 18 years of my life that is had entered into my subconscious and influencing my choices and actions. I also know like I have massive trust issues because I was manipulated a lot by them trying to mold me into something that could 'survive in this world'. So alot of the therapeutic techniques like Kniesiology have not worked on me as I developed a defence mechanism to not let anyone in if I realized they were trying, and I feel like to use these techniques such as EFT (emotional freedom technique) or NLP (neuro linguistic reprogramming) or even Theta one needs to be open to the suggestion or the method, but if your unconscious unconsciously blocks you from suggestion or being open to it how does that work? So I think asking others here about how reprogramming their subconscious has affected them in general, may help me open? I also was wondering if any of you who had trust issues had success with these kind of reprogramming or any other subconscious reprogramming for childhood conditioning? Or any kind of guidance about any of it would be helpful. Thank you for reading and much appreciation for any responses

Hello all, I am definitely on and working towards staying on the path of actualization and of awakening to enlightenment. But, a thought has come up often and today again whilst I was listening to @Leo Gura's latest video on distraction, so I wanted to put this question to you all… If when we die, the individual ends, the personality ends, the self ends and goes back into the substrata that makes the all, what difference does it make whether we attain enlightenment or not? I mean if you believe in reincarnation of the self - I can see why it would matter because then the self ‘comes back’ with a higher consciousness and therefore incarnates into a more evolved state.. But, I have come to a different understanding of reincarnation and it no longer involves a continuation of self… that old version of reincarnation satisfied my ego very much as it saw it just as a continuation of itself, but as I realize the self, the ego is a finite ‘thing’ that lasts one lifetime and can be reduced greatly in that life time, then what would the difference be if I actualized if I attained enlightenment or not…? Is that not still just a state of achievement for my ego’s experience in this life and it’s hope to continue after? I really do not have the answers and only questions and to be honest have been having a bit of an existential crisis regarding all the beliefs that have carried me thus far.. for example the power of prayer, or the assistance of more evolved beings/forces… at the moment I don’t even know if those things are ‘real’ sigh.. Ok any helpful insights would be lovely, Peace, B

I wrote a poem regarding my current perceptions. Does anyone else here write poetry, that they would like to share? Well, here is mine : Sound selective surrender Slipping through smiles and hellos 5 lifetimes of interactions, moments, openings, closings, death by betrayal And then what follows.. Old, Ancient eyes watching.. lingering apathetic acceptance swallowing eagerness of new welcomings, of new reachings , swallowing notions of unique endings, swallowing … So predictable , the patterns of the ego and it’s grasping So inertia sets in… And so soon does death come, that entering into the nothingness that is the only constant, that place behind silent and black Here, where no one matters where no thing exists. The incomprehensibility that no mind comprehends The unlimited potential before birthing before deaths And arising, Maya the veil behind which Truth exists, the veil behind which those who Know Be, Behind the projected perceptions thrown like nets over the clear opening to the void. When terrifying surrender is the only way forward to complete obliteration, Of Separation, Of Self. The only authenticity. But, resistance appears, because warriors barely exist anymore And a battlefield arises Weapons and methods, tactics and strategies War. But, there are spiraling galaxies spinning through emptiness still, There are stars exploding And babies being born There is union And Absolute Infinity. Despite it all. What greater joy is there than potential? Bliss. B.Clear

Hi @Serotoninluv I have been experiencing similar, though not provoked by aya or lsd which I did in the past, but provoked by intense, dedicated self inquiry and self exploration. I have shared my perceptions resulting from it - that no belief or value is real and no reality is the real one - and it has agitated friends who think I'm having some sort of a mental break down. I mean I am breaking down mental constructs through experience, so I guess they are right in a way. But despite peoples reactions, I find that sharing what I am going through with people, who get it, helps ground the experience, also meditation does, and personally I am needing some solitude to process it all. It is all a bit scary, but as you know the unknown always is. I wont lie you could risk loosing all the illusory roles you have attached to in this life, which is happening to me to some extent, but I think there is a way through it without completely detaching form all obligation and responsibility and for me it is the practice of humility and reminding myself that I don't know, and whilst not knowing to just do the best with all of my responsibilities until I get more clear. not sure if this helps, but those are my two cents.

this thread is disturbing

Thank you @hundreth I was actually looking for something like that. I just need to get a new phone and then I shall download And I loved your poem @Nexeternity ! I have been bringing awareness too and playing with my boundaries of limitation so it really resonates

@Arkandeus thank you for this response. It really resonates with me, and is quite eye/mind/heart/being opening

Ps I LOVE Nina Simone! And thanks for the creative response, its how my mind thinks so I appreciate Actually thank you everyone , I appreciate everyone's responses <3

Shit ok I need to go meditate... It is still hard for me to understand how there can be no reason for the work, the work to surrender, the work to be authentic, the work to notice and eliminate addiction and distraction. My reason used to be a deep yearning for union with the Divine... that 'Something Greater' and more loving that me... now I am questioning whether a divine even exists, the way I felt it did...? So all I can come up with now as my "reason" or my "aim" is to just experience who I am in the moment, as fully and without filter as I can. I did that after our initial forum chat. I went to go lay on my bed and just felt myself perceiving myself interacting with the environment the everything that was in the environment and all environments beyond, it felt activating, almost arousing but not in the usual way that leads to intimacy with a person. Just waves of energy moving up, and then I fell asleep. That is all. But then I went to my interview - for a volunteer position - and had the most beautiful expansive interaction with the interviewer (which is not common for me as I have been socially distant from others for while feeling unseen and different to them), the same thing happened with the man selling me the lottery ticket on the way home, and everything just felt pretty.. amazing.. it's settling a bit now but I still feel happier than I have in ages. I wonder if that's the "point", but yes I hear you there is no point, but I still need to embody that So for me, right now, I think it has to still be 'about something' and that something for me now, is just to experience the moment and my self and my being interacting with it... Thank you for the responses, I feel a shift has happened and it continuing to happen.. ~Bianca

So from what all of you said... It seems to me the only point of self actualization and enlightenment, is to have a good time whilst alive...? hmm.. I guess I could see value in that...

First accept yourself. You cannot change what you do not first accept. Once you have accepted yourself, look at yourself objectively, as if you are a parent looking at your child. Love that child, then gently guide that child in the direction that is best for him. That is where the research comes in, learn as much as you can about the values you have respect for, find teachers who speak of them, then gently, kindly, and consistently guide yourself there. You must do this everyday, and you can only do something for 'someone' everyday if there is the power of love behind it. So everyday find new ways to love yourself and have compassion for yourself as you guide yourself. Believe in the impossible.... its the only way to break through your limited thinking.

I wrote this poem on facebook today with this picture of me.. I am not sure if anyone there had any idea of what I was talking about... This is something that would in the past bring me great anxiety... But after working with some of Leo's principles I feel confidence in speaking my truth, the truth of my perspective and sharing my poetry on it. Also would still love to hear poetry from anyone else here Here is today's poem: Spiral Dynamics. Systems thinking. Self Actualized Authenticity. All these perspectives, mindsets, concepts, occupy, evert, self reflect through me. Yet pink and yellow, eyes, lips, form, mannerisms, projections are generally what’s seen. Those that look deeper, past the gatekeepers those are the seekers whom I seek, What convoluted wormholes, catalytic occurrences, enigmatic thaumaturgy, we all be. With no definitive, no delineated, no conclusive end to meet. B. Clear

@Leo Gura So are you saying this is something to expect and accept, or that one should avoid getting involved with people who are still in mechanical self-survival?

I can totally relate Tron, I just broke up with someone. I originally initiated the path towards the break up stating that though I loved them I needed to instate boundaries on the unhealthy inconsiderate way they were treating me. Had three conversation saying that if it happened again we would have to end. I almost broke up with them but eventually did not have the heart to, saying I was not clear if I should or should not. They then broke up with me a few days later over facebook - even though it was a serious relationship including children and they had partially moved into my new house in the three months we were together, they did not even do it on person or on the phone. I felt so disrespected. Then I saw how easily they moved on. The first time we saw each other a week later, this person was elated having a great time at the event, whilst I was sad for the hurt we had caused one another and the loss of what on some levels was a good relationship. I felt so easily discarded. With this rejection, I suddenly wanted them to want to get back together with me, for them to want to do the work to make It work - but their absolute lack of desire to do so, just kept injuring me and fueling my desire. It really is so absurd... For me I think it stems back to my childhood where my parents rejected me in a lot of ways and tried to 'mold' me in somewhat abusive ways into who they thought would be better. So I think when someone rejects me I yearn for them to seem my value and make the effort to embrace me for who I am. I am hurting alot about this right now and I'm confused as to whether it is more heartbreak or more the rejection issue or just the result of both. I am still confused. And I do know the saying that we don't need others to make us happy. I do believe that but I still have a need to not be rejected and am working on that. I don't know if my story helped or not but I do resonate with yours

This Man is a Master: Watch till the end, you wont be disappointed. Its gets EPIC!

I wrote some Prose about Mastery today. Inspired by my work with Leo an this community. Mastery: There are many different kinds of masters. The Artisan, The Heyoka, The Divine Lover. The Musician, The Dancer, The Poet, The Teacher. The Guide . Each with so much to offer and transmit if only they are held in Veneration. Yet fear leads us to seek out fault, weakness, error. To criticize and condemn. To judge and belittle. We expect perfection before we can allow devotion, because we misunderstand and do not realize that the devotion is to our own awe... Our Awe, that state that opens all doors, in our Being. We are here to learn to unlock our own doors, and the masters they come to provide the intricate depth of arousal that beauty, talent and shock do provoke, simply to wake us up to that. B.Clear x

Name: Bianca Maya Foltyn(Clear) Age: 36 Gender: Female Location: Queensland, Australia Occupation: Spiritual Counsellor/Regular counsellor Marital Status: Newly single Kids: No Hobbies: I Ching, Toa te Ching, Medicine Ceremonies, Ritual, Communing with Trees, Singing to the creek at the bottom of my property. Understaning Human Behaviour. Enlightenment, Meditation, Contemplation, Self Development/Self Actualization I consciously started the Journey to self development when I was around 9 years old. At that time the only 'mystical' text I had access to was the Bible. So I would spend time reading the psalms and proverbs. I came across Proverbs 8 about wisdom. This was it: "Wisdom’s Call: Does not wisdom call out? Does not understanding raise her voice? At the highest point along the way, where the paths meet, she takes her stand; beside the gate leading into the city, at the entrance, she cries aloud: “To you, O people, I call out; I raise my voice to all mankind. You who are simple, gain cautiousness; you who are foolish, set your hearts on it. Listen, for I have trustworthy things to say; I open my lips to speak what is right. My mouth speaks what is true, for my lips detest wickedness. All the words of my mouth I make just; none of them are crooked or perverse. To the discerning they show right; they are upright to those who have found knowledge. Choose my instruction instead of silver, knowledge rather than choice gold, for wisdom is more precious than rubies, and nothing you desire can compare with her. “I, wisdom, dwell together with cautiousness; I possess knowledge and discretion. Counsel and sound judgment are mine; I have insight, I have power. By me kings reign and rulers issue decrees that are just; by me princes govern, and nobles—all who rule on earth. I love those who love me, and those who seek me find me. With me are riches and honor, enduring wealth and prosperity. My fruit is better than fine gold; what I yield surpasses choice silver. I walk in the way of righteousness, along the paths of justice, bestowing a rich inheritance on those who love me and making their treasuries full. “The Lord brought me forth as the first of his works, before his deeds of old; I was formed long ages ago, at the very beginning, when the world came to be. When there were no watery depths, I was given birth, when there were no springs overflowing with water; before the mountains were settled in place, before the hills, I was given birth, before he made the world or its fields or any of the dust of the earth. I was there when he set the heavens in place, when he marked out the horizon on the face of the deep, when he established the clouds above and fixed securely the fountains of the deep, when he gave the sea its boundary so the waters would not overstep his command, and when he marked out the foundations of the earth. Then I was constantly at his side. I was filled with delight day after day, rejoicing always in his presence, rejoicing in this whole world and delighting in mankind. “Now then, my children, listen to me; blessed are those who keep my ways. Listen to my instruction and be wise; do not disregard it. Blessed are those who listen to me, watching daily at my doors, waiting at my doorway. For those who find me find life and receive favor from the Lord. But those who fail to find me harm themselves" - Proverbs 8" That is when I dedicated myself to answering "wisdoms call" I felt a deep sadness in my childs heart that wisdom called out and people would not answer. So I decided to answer. Shortly after through one of Deepak Chopras Books called "The return of Merlin" I discovered Vedic literature and eastern mysticism, I then began to explore meditation. Soon after I was diagnosed with Petit Mal, a form of epilepsy where you have absence seiures and put on heavy medication that numbed me to an extent. Things go bad as I hit my teens and due to the presure of my father I developed anorexia and bullimia and became quite suicidal. At that time I was exploring Celtic Mythology. When things got at their worst I met teacher who initatiated into transcendental meditation at age 15, which started to turn my life back around and I came off the medication. We then immigrated from South Africa to America. It was a hard transition for me as I made a commitment to no longer have an eating disorder but I messed up my metabolism so I gained more weight that I had in my life. As the foreigner , I also was not so welcomed into the preppy school. I became heavily depressed and my parents solution was to send me to South Africa for surgery to remove all my excess weight. The surgery did not really work and resulted in the doctor cutting me open in his consultation room whilst I was consious and watching my chest open. I dissociated from my body and it has taken 17 years to come back to it. Most of my self development was to cope with all the pains I have been through living in South Africa and surrounded by trauma 24/7 along with my parents loving actions out of ignorance and my commitment and vow to wisdom. I now live in Australia and feel like for the first time in 7 years I am back on track with my self development Personal challenges I've overcome: Overcame Epilepsy Overcame Anorexia and Bulimia Immigrating 5 times overcome being shunned by my family for my sexual orientation and reconciling Changed careers Worked successfully as a sole trader for 6 years - I don't know if I can quite call it a business as I just rented a consultation room and worked out of there? Completed my Masters BSc in Psychology and Masters in Counselling despite my dyslexia and ADD Living with no family in a foreign country Overcame unknowingly falling into a astral traveling/gnostic cult when I first moved here and didn't know anyone and then leaving it and reprogramming my brain washing What I'm working on now: Working on self actualization & Enlightenment Working on starting my first proper holistic counseling business Working on recovering from y breakup and understanding and addressing my role in that Working on reaching out and connecting with people who are like minded Working on making enough money to pay rent, buy food and look after my animals whilst I try set up my business. Working on developing my personal power Working on becoming physically stronger and more connected to my body Working on eliminating my low grade underlying post trauma/depression/distrust of people&life that surfaces more so when things get tough.

Hello For me learning to be fully human is my sacred Journey. Possibly due to childhood illness, epilepsy and trauma I have spent most of my existence perceiving the world and my body as an illusion. Something unreal so easily manipulated, and the only true things for me have been the pursuit of Wisdom and the turning and returning into Purity. I believe that this internal standpoint led me to a life where I have immigrated continents 5 times, and instead of working as a Doctor as I first began my academic studies in and then a Human Resource Manager which allowed me a Visa into this country, I ended up unexpectedly working full time & professionally as a healer and a psychic for years. Some part of me thought "wow I made it to being an elder distributing wisdom, guidance and insight before I've even reached my mid 30's." But, something felt off and instead of fulfilling me and adding to my growth I found myself feeling emptier with time and stagnating with inertia in my spiritual growth. Along with that I developed a mistrust for anyone that called themself a healer for two reasons. Firstly, In the wellness centers I worked in, I truly felt like the practitioners were in large part often narcissistic or delusional mostly interested in building up their self image and making money off of others then truly uplifting humanity. Secondly though I myself was not so interested in money or marketing and though my clients reported great benefits from working with me, I still felt a little lost inside, l felt unready to be doing this work at this level and like I had slowed or stunted my own growth. Also since having spent so many years looking mostly into the unseen realms and using my intuition, and being out of body that I found my connection with my body - which was never that great began with - diminish even more, along with my rationality, pragmatism, energy levels and efficiency in mundane tasks decreased. So in light of that, My goals are: To reconnect fully with my body and embrace it with compassion and love. To watch it grow stronger and healthier. To develop my pragmatism, my energy levels and efficiency in life living. To build and sustain a successful counseling practice here in my new home town. I just moved cross country here in Australia soon after struggling through and achieving my Masters in counseling and leaving my practice behind. So I am starting anew, and wanting to build up a counseling practice here where I can infuse my other gifts. Starting fresh, at the age of 36 and after a break up with my long term partner and then a recent break up with the person I in large part moved here for, seems daunting. But, I know somewhere inside of me I have the strength, resilience, creativity and know how to achieve this. This is how I found Leo, and I am very grateful to what I have gleaned from him thus far. I hope to get to know some of you and to take the most advantage of what Leo has set up for us as possible. Many Blessings, Bianca