Hardkill

I finally watched the entire video at least a couple times. It actually was helpful to me to a degree. You're definitely right that need to focus more on getting a job, career, fulfilling my life purpose, dealing with my mom, etc. That's one reason why I have been working even harder lately on those things. I feel like I have become a little more productive and have been showing my parents that I have been showing more maturity lately. However, I am just worried about their being any possible negative implications or unintended consequences to continuously suppressing my sexual urges, especially since I am very horny. I don't want to get involved with hookers because they are illegal. Btw, are u also insinuating that I should stop posting threads and posts on this forum?

True. A lot of it is in my control. I think my depression has gotten better, but I still have ways to go. How do u manage it?

Have u ever had trouble controlling your sexual urges?

That is true. A lot will indeed think it’s creepy or predatorial. However, I believe the majority of women actually appreciate being cold approach as long as it is done respectfully. Yeah I am definitely gonna check out the vid very soon. I am sure it sounds good. Alright, well I won’t lose hope on meeting random people. Thank you very much.

Oh no, I actually didn't really watch it. I overlooked it because I already knew about Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. However, since you implied that Leo in that video specifically explains where and when sexual needs should be met in the Hierarchy, I will definitely watch that. Thanks. However, I fear that by the time I fulfill my needs for my job, career, and life purpose, which will probably be at least a few years from now, that pickup or cold approaching women will be completely looked down upon and even made illegal. I don't know. Again, maybe I am wrong and I am just blowing this out of proportion. What do u think?

I know. Though it’s so hard to quit or even reduce the amount that I watch.

Huh?

Almost everyday I’ve been fapping and I watch porn almost everyday for at least a half hour to an hour each day. Sometimes 2 hours a day.

Lol. Are u serious?

So, it sounds like I have no choice, but to continue suppressing my sexual desires and/or masturbate until I figure out a way to get rid of my mom.

You guys are right. I really have to figure something out to stop my mom. I just don't know what to do about it.

So why does Leo say that u can’t just meditate your fundamental urges away?

That’s not the issue right now. As I said in my first post on here, my mom doesn’t trust me with trying to approach random women and having sex with them. Every time, I go out of my home, my mom always calls me every single half hour to an hour. If I stay out past the allotted time she gave me, then she will constantly call me until I get back home. I know, this is very lame and unseemly for a man of my age, but she constantly watches over as a hyper neurotic helicopter my mom.

I can't move into my own place. I have no money of my own. Even though, she still would call me about every hour of the day to check up on me. If I had a million dollars then I would move out and buy myself a nice home or apartment for myself. Then I would pay for the life purpose course to figure what I want to do that it very feasible for me. I would also pay for expensive 1 one 1 coaching sessions that will help me get a lot better with my social, dating, and sex life. I also would buy some lube, condoms, and fleshlights to practice getting good at sex and experimenting more of my sexuality. I also would buy a lot of good quality food to help me bulk up my bodyweight at a healthy rate. I'd give some of the money to charity. I'd buy very fashionable clothing and pay for a really stylish haircut. Plus, I'd pay for special personal training to take my overall fitness to the next level. Additionally, I would by martial arts posts and equipment that would really help me with my training as a martial artist. I may even pay someone to personally assist me in my sparring skills. I would also by an adorable dog and cat from a shelter. Man, there's so much I think I could do with a million dollars.

Yes, I still live with her. I work for my dad part time at home. Unfortunately, I haven't been able to pay for Leo's LP course. I am still stuck trying to figure out what my purpose is in life. I have ideas, but they are so far just pipe-dreams.

@Vipassana I am 30

Wait, but wouldn't that just make me even more frustrated if I neurotically suppressed my urges perpetually? I am a sexual creature just like everybody else. I kinda wish Leo made a video on No Fap. He seems like he would have a very sensible and yet practical approach to understanding and dealing with masturbation.

Well, no I wouldn't say that. Fortunately, I've always had a loving family and a dog I love very much. Though, I have depression and a lot of people have let me down in life. I've never really felt like I could truly fit in with anyone in my life. I am 30 years old and having never had a serious girlfriend. Also, I am getting sick and tired of having a helicopter mom. I can't do much when she is constantly in my way and calling me or checking up on me almost every god damn hour.

I am mostly serious. Love can be an extremely powerful motivator, but not everyone is lucky enough to have true love, much less romantic love. Also, most people cannot handle falling in love with someone. Becoming too attached to someone can be used against you. However, pride, rage, power are all much more within your control. Don’t get this wrong though, humility, a moderate amount of respect for certain people, a fair amount of fear for particular things in this world, willpower, and intellect are just as equally important with regard to succeeding at anything in the world (including getting along with others). However, ego, instilling anger, lust, dreams, and ambition for dominance are the most reliable motivational factors. Love will not always be there for you. Yet, pride, rage, lust, dreams, are always traits that are within your control. You may abandoned them for a while, but they will always be there for you.

Who needs romantic love when hatred, power, and pride are your greatest allies for your life? When you get to the core of it, you can't trust other people. In the end, they all let you down, including your loved ones. However, you can ALWAYS trust your own pride and rage to fuel your motivation to gain the power you need to dominate in this world.

All of this is largely true. However, a lot of girls who do smile at me, have an open posture, and have sexy clothing tend to put on a front for attention> Otherwise, they are looking for someone who is cool (above average social skills). A guy can have all of the confidence in the world, but without sufficient social skills, then he very likely will not be able to completely attract any of the TYPES of girls he wants and will have very limited options as to whom will be down with him. It's a sorry sight, but it's reality. Only the strong alpha males with either high status within a certain area of their life or high levels of social adeptness will have their pick of the girls they want, even if they look like an ugly little shit or are dirt-poor. I am still a nobody in this world and that's why it's so f*cking hard to get anywhere with people wherever I am at.

I know I keep bringing this problem up regarding my social and seduction skills with women, but I still keep thinking about this problem and I am still not confident and hopeful enough about my ability to improve significantly with women and even people in general. Sure, I might be able to get a few lays here and there if I consistently cold approached about 30-40 girls a week. Yeah, I probably would be able to find a woman would be mediocre to me if I just decided to "settle." Hell, to be honest, there have been a few times in my life where I was given the opportunity to be in a relationship with a girl who I was not physically attracted to. However, not only do I not want to settle for someone who would be so-so to me, but I am aware of how big of a mistake that would be if I did that. Also, I am not sure that I ever be able to be gain enough skill to the point where I will be able to keep a woman I am truly attracted to for long. I know that many dating coaches have mentioned that they have helped a number of clients who have Asperger's or Autism succeed with women, albeit took them longer to achieve than the average person. However, I don't always trust these coaches because there's always a good chance that they could be lying to people like me just as a used car salesman would say just about anything to a naive customer to make a sale. In fact, I've become increasingly skeptical about what most PUA coaches and dating experts say because I've feel like I've tried all kinds of advice out there with all sorts of girls in all types of venues and hardly any of it has worked, in my opinion. Plus, I am concerned about my ability to read body language, facial expressions, and tonality properly. I am concerned that I may make a girl feel uncomfortable to the point where she trying to signal to me to leave, but I am not taking that hint and so I end up inadvertently harassing her. I used to believe that I finally got it down to the average person's level. However, there have been a few times where I've gotten kicked out of bars, malls, and gyms because I somehow made some of the girls in each of those places feel too uncomfortable around me and never got the hint from any of them beforehand that I was doing so. For example, the manager of my previous gym that I got kicked out of told me what happened when they a couple of complaints about my approaches towards certain women and said that I made them somehow uncomfortable. I got kicked out of a bar one time because I was called out for making a bartender uncomfortable by staring at her. I got kicked out of a mall before because the security said that they received a few complaints from women who claimed that I harassed even when I being very respectful to each of the women there and never followed them when they walked away from me. I was never even told by any of the women themselves at the mall beforehand to leave them alone or "fuck off". So, if anyone could please give a brutally honest opinion about my prospects in improvement my sex, dating, and social life I would appreciate it. I am trying to be realistic and don't want to needlessly raise my hopes up.

I used to be a complete misfit back in elementary school and have always been highly competitive in virtually every area of my life. I still don't feel good enough. I also was terminated from my grad school program last year for sexual harassment and wasn't given any warning beforehand over what I did. I don't want to really talk about that in particular. I am still having trouble simply observing the thoughts. I have an understanding of them, but it's so hard to just accept as thoughts, especially when we live in a society that constantly demands results and lots of worry about so many things pertaining to our own lives. As for meditating, to be honest, I've stopped meditating since about a month ago. It was so hard to lay still and everyday not think about anything or let my urges to watch something on TV or on the computer or porn get the best of me. Can I message with you over PM?

So, it's been a long time since I've written stuff down here on my own personal journal. This week I was able to experience a moment of pride and satisfaction of accomplishment for just two day. However, the day after it happens I lose that feeling and go back to my regular self. I was proud of being able to run 10 miles non-stop outside including running for 3 laps around a football field with 2 hills for each lap. I completed the 10 miles in 1 hour 19 min. and 29 sec. at a pace of about 7 min. 56 sec. per mile. That feeling last happened a few days ago. I wish I had that feeling back again. Fuck.

Hey guys, so I've been trying to fight off this victim mindset, I've been having and I think I've made some progress to a degree, but I still feel the agony of self-pity and anger. It sucks and I still can't help, but focus more on the results than the process. I don't understand how some humans can just keep going. Not to mention that this transitioning over from a victim's mindset to that of a fighter's mentality takes a lot of mental energy. I wish I had unlimited mental endurance like a Marine Corps soldier. I also still have trouble differentiating between realistic and pessimistic thoughts in my head.