Hardkill

Join a weightlifiting gym and do Starting Strength for a while or pick a martial art for a while, then after several months add in which one you did not pick and do that for a while. Those Heavy lifts will really develop the intensity of your mental toughness and so will martial arts to a degree. Eventually do some more cardio after doing both martial arts and weight training for several months. Otherwise, do martial arts and running for several months before you add in a weightlifting routine. The hard cardio will build the duration of your mental toughness. Get ready to choose your favorite music for your workouts.

This cannot be.......FAPPENIIIIIIIÌNNG!!

Not yet. Though I will one day, once I've saved up enough money for it.

If your social skills suck then brace yourself for some years of pain, trauma, and suffering to improve your dating skills. Also, in all honesty, I am not 100% sure that even practicing talking to countless people can ever substantially increase your social skills to the point where u will be able to find and keep a group of high quality friends and a HOT girl.

Until there is enough scientific evidence to prove that no fap works, I see no reason to stop fapping. It all sounds like a bunch of alternative therapy crap.

I already tried for several months now and yeah my confidence has been restored to a degree. Though it’s not happening fast enough. I still feel like I am hanging by a thread.

I would like to have the Moderators’ opinion on something that I am confused about regarding Maslow’s hierarchy. According to Maslow's hierarchy and what Leo said in his video pertaining to the practical application of this vital concept of psychology, fulfilling sexual needs, along with establishing familial and platonic bonds, must be accomplished before one works on building their self-esteem and certainly before one undertakes activities and ideas pertaining to self-actualization and self-transcendence. Yes, Leo did say that you can short-cut your way to the top or near-top of the Maslow hierarchy, IF YOU YOURSELF CAN tolerate skipping many, if not all of the fundamental human needs for surviving and functional well in this world. However, I REALLY DON'T think, in all honesty, that I can do that. I am very horny and do not have ABNORMALLY high levels of willpower or even an EXTREMELY high desire to FOCUS SOLELY on building my self-esteem, confidence, as well as self-actualizing and self-transcendence. I don't mean to come off as a self-centered coward or weak-minded person. I am just being realistic and practical on how to improve the quality of my whole life, like Leo was suggesting for most people to do before they can truly and wholeheartedly, ultimately commit to working on self-actualization and self-transcendence. However, It's quite confusing because many people on this forum, numerous other forums, mental health experts, therapists, life and dating coaches, etc. have mentioned how crucial it is to establish or make sure that you have enough self-love and confidence and esteem, in yourself and work on your passions and self-actualize before you embark upon the world of dating, sex, and romance. Otherwise, you will very unlikely succeed at dating and not being needy by trying to fill some sort of emotional void created from your past. Please help me clarify on what someone like me is supposed to do according to the hierarchy pyramid. I would really appreciate it.

“Stop being so angry and bitter and find a better dating strategy.” What if I’ve already tried practically every dating strategy out there and I am still struggling like a loser? What if there is no dating for some guys not because of their attitude, but because they simply don’t have the natural latent ability to learn it? Like singing, not everyone can learn to be a good singer gave their last dying breath for it. Being an athlete, not everyone can learn to be a good athlete even if they gave their blood, sweat, and tears for it. Not everyone can make it into the acting industry even if they devoted their entire lives to it. I remember P Diddy saying “you can’t just teach someone how to be a star.” U also, can’t just have positive attitude and passion for something in order to succeed at it. It’s all about RAW TALENT. Believe me, I’ve tried for years working very hard at this whole dating process and doing crazy shit that not even most mortal men would even dare to do. I reached the point where I felt so hopeless, depressed, and incredibly outraged and frustrated. Dating to me feels so futile, that it’s like I am fighting a long-drawn out battle that I’ll probably never win regardless of what I’ll try or how hard I try or even how much I let go and try my best to move forward. Maybe someone here could convince me that I am wrong because I still feel a lot like that Kent TV guy I just posted here. Btw, I’ve already heard all of the cliche stories out there before, like “It took Thomas Edison thousands of tries to finally get it right,” “Michael Jordan was cut from the Basketball team numerous times before he became a successful pro basketball player and subsequently became the GOAT legend of NBA” or “Abraham Lincoln, lost many elections before he became the next great President of the US,” blah, blah, blah. Those notions don’t always work for everyone. What do u guys think?

I really feel their pain. In fact, I've been inclined to join it. Dating has gotten so hard these days and it's like no matter what we or what we try we will still feel like social losers. It's a very sorry sight. I used to really feel very similar to this. Though, I feel the same level of frustration and rage this guy felt in this video.

Ah okay, that makes a lot more sense. So, I should work on all facets of my life from the bottom top of the Maslow pyramid at about the same time. However, some facets should be worked on PREDOMINANTLY compared to the other facets including usually the higher level facets of my life. Correct?

Guys I tried no fapping for days even weeks on end and I feel actually more like shit, angry, and hopelessness.

I don’t know man. I feel like I will suffer immensely the longer I keep up with that struggle to hold my sexual urges deep in me. Why did Maslow say that sex had to come before self esteem and self actualization? Maybe u can show me how you u do it step by step on a Skype session. I suck at meditating and letting go of emotions. I’ve tried it many times and I never could have the strength for it. I feel so powerless and not smart enough.

Actually, I wanted to address issue more closely. According to Maslow's hierarchy and what Leo said in his video pertaining to the practical application of this vital concept of psychology, fulfilling sexual needs, along with establishing familial and platonic bonds, must be accomplished before one works on building their self-esteem and certainly before one undertakes activities and ideas pertaining to self-actualization and self-transcendence. Yes, Leo did say that you can short-cut your way to the top or near-top of the Maslow hierarchy, IF YOU YOURSELF CAN tolerate skipping many, if not all of the fundamental human needs for surviving and functional well in this world. However, I REALLY DON'T think, in all honesty, that I can do that. I am very horny and do not have ABNORMALLY high levels of willpower or even an EXTREMELY high desire to FOCUS SOLELY on building my self-esteem, confidence, as well as self-actualizing and self-transcendence. I don't mean to come off as a self-centered coward or weak-minded person. I am just being realistic and practical on how to improve the quality of my whole life, like Leo was suggesting for most people to do before they can truly and wholeheartedly, ultimately commit to working on self-actualization and self-transcendence. However, It's quite confusing because many people on this forum, numerous other forums, mental health experts, therapists, life and dating coaches, etc. have mentioned how crucial it is to establish or make sure that you have enough self-love and confidence and esteem, in yourself and work on your passions and self-actualize before you embark upon the world of dating, sex, and romance. Otherwise, you will very unlikely succeed at dating and not being needy by trying to fill some sort of emotional void created from your past. Please help me clarify on what someone like me is supposed to do according to the hierarchy pyramid. I would really appreciate it.

Yeah that fleshlight is gonna feel really good!

I have to first take care of my basic needs and desires. Then I'll be ready to maximize to self-actualize and beyond. Did you watch Maslow's Hierarchy video?

Of course no one likes to be used. I don't like taking advantage of people. Have you done cold approaching before?

Guys, I've really gotten worried that sometime soon in the future, picking up random girls will be made illegal because of all of these MeToo events, anti-men feminists, and sexual harassment allegations made throughout every type of media. It's good that women have become increasingly protected by the law, security, and human rights activists; however, the PUA community has not only continually gotten a bad rap for teaching guys to manipulate women as objects and influence them to become "predatorial" (which is largely untrue), but also it has increasingly received greater hostility from women. Just recently, Gambler, Richard La Ruina, who made a video game called Super Seducer already had its release onto the Playstation 4 console cancelled, because it was deemed too misogynistic. Furthermore, more women have been publicly complaining about how many times they have been sexually harassed or violated by some random creeper out in the street or in a bar or club or what have you. However, I still believe that cold approach is a very useful way to improve your social skills with people in general and your seduction skills with those of the opposite sex (or same sex if your homosexual). So what are hard case novices like me gonna do when pick-up becomes increasingly shamed to the point of becoming against the law to practice it at all? Am I right or am I just blowing this way out of proportion?

Ah, Ok. That's good. Thank God. Also, I will try harder to cut down on my porn time and take a look at the NoFap thread. Thank you very much again for your help and advice.

Bodybuilding or any sort of weight training regimen is always worth it. Don't ever think otherwise. I know that it can feel frustrating because you don't think that it's changing your life as much as you thought it would or feel like it will be a waste of time and energy to start committing to weight training seriously, if you haven't already. I started as a skinny ectomorph and eventually worked my way up to looking not just more athletic, but also relatively muscular. Nevertheless, bodybuilding or weight training isn't just about looking good, it's about vital for your healthy and overall physical strength in life. It also trains your mental toughness for life in general. Also, people will start to notice you more and compliment you the more you get buff. As long as you're a natty and you manage your time effectively then it worth doing. Ideally, each workout session should last no longer than 45 min. to an hour. If you are training primarily for strength and working on perfecting your lifting technique, then you can stay at the gym longer than an hour if u want and have the time to do so because each heavy working set can take up to 10 min. in between sets and it may take more time to work with lighter weight to working on honing your technique. If you are training primarily for bodybuilding then the workout that is specifically tailored for that goal should really be no longer than a hour. Otherwise you will just be burning up too much glycogen stores and can cause unnecessary catabolic on the muscles. Remember, when perform weight training exercises for bodybuilding you have much less recovery time in between sets compared to when you are doing your main heavy lifts. Also, if you stay longer than an hour or hour and 15 min. doing bodybuilding exercises then you start getting into the zone of training for conditioning/endurance. Having said all of that, healthy foods that are cheap to buy in bulk would be sweet potatoes, brown rice, chicken breasts at the supermarket, peanut butter sandwich, breads, and other grains. If you're a vegan, then unfortunately I won't be able to help you out with that since I am not a vegan weight training. However, look up Youtube vids on vegan bodybuilders like Vegan gains or Clarence Kennedy. Those vegans are fucking beasts, especially Clarence Kennedy, who is 100 kg (220 lbs.) and can ATG PAUSE back squat 300 kg (660 kg). Plus, the guy looks as built as Clark Kent/Superman. He calls himself Harry Squatter. I am not sure, but those guys and other vegan fitness Youtubers may have some useful tips for economically purchasing healthy foods for building mass. Oh yeah look up AthleanX on buying healthy foods and enjoying your meals. That guy is a legit DPT and personal trainer for weight training. His methods are a little unorthodox, but they make sense and work. Btw, buy lots of seasoning and salt to make your foods taste better. lastly, having a cheat junk meal once a week is absolutely acceptance, especially for a skinny guy like you.

I finally watched the entire video at least a couple times. It actually was helpful to me to a degree. You're definitely right that need to focus more on getting a job, career, fulfilling my life purpose, dealing with my mom, etc. That's one reason why I have been working even harder lately on those things. I feel like I have become a little more productive and have been showing my parents that I have been showing more maturity lately. However, I am just worried about their being any possible negative implications or unintended consequences to continuously suppressing my sexual urges, especially since I am very horny. I don't want to get involved with hookers because they are illegal. Btw, are u also insinuating that I should stop posting threads and posts on this forum?

True. A lot of it is in my control. I think my depression has gotten better, but I still have ways to go. How do u manage it?

Have u ever had trouble controlling your sexual urges?

That is true. A lot will indeed think it’s creepy or predatorial. However, I believe the majority of women actually appreciate being cold approach as long as it is done respectfully. Yeah I am definitely gonna check out the vid very soon. I am sure it sounds good. Alright, well I won’t lose hope on meeting random people. Thank you very much.

Oh no, I actually didn't really watch it. I overlooked it because I already knew about Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. However, since you implied that Leo in that video specifically explains where and when sexual needs should be met in the Hierarchy, I will definitely watch that. Thanks. However, I fear that by the time I fulfill my needs for my job, career, and life purpose, which will probably be at least a few years from now, that pickup or cold approaching women will be completely looked down upon and even made illegal. I don't know. Again, maybe I am wrong and I am just blowing this out of proportion. What do u think?

I know. Though it’s so hard to quit or even reduce the amount that I watch.