Hardkill

It's not about pretending at all. I do agree with you 100% that everyone has to be absolutely the real you that's inside you. In the case of man, it's about bringing out that masculinity from within. Most men these days have become too feminine, which has made them too emotional, too needy, too insecure about themselves, and too unassertive. In actuality, most men are hiding behind a facade that neither shows at all what it means to be a man nor allows them to speak their desires and intentions as a man. Why do you think that most men don't have the balls to go up to a woman they are really attracted to and tell her with solid confidence that the real reason he is talking to her is because he thought and felt that she looked cute, beautiful, pretty, gorgeous, hot, sexy, etc.? Why do you think that most men don't want to be the one's to decide and state what they really want to do on a date(s) and where they want to go to on a date(s) and when they want to go on a date? Why are most men too afraid of being sexual and making the moves on her because he wants to admit to her or clearly demonstrate that he honestly wants to sleep with her and possibly be a potential boyfriend/husband instead of just pretending or giving off a false impression of wanting to be just friends with her? All of this is because because most men are TOO AFRAID TO BE DIRECT with a woman. They don't want to risk getting rejected or even coming off as a creep (which to SOME degree is a risk that every strong man has to take with women). Sadly, they are also so many out there too who never grew up with a father or an older man who could be not just like a father to them, but also one who could be a strong masculine father figure to them. Consequently, these guys never got to look up to someone who could really teach and show them growing up how to be a man, let alone experience true manhood. Yes, an ideal relationship consists of interdependence and mutual respect. However, it is a man's responsibility to take the lead and initiate almost everything with a woman. Most men are beta-male providers who get with certain women who only got into a relationship with them or married them primarily for their money and/or other means of providing for her. A lot of women also like to take advantage of these kinds of guys whom they can control and gain so much attention and validation from. Also, most women who are not with a dominant man eventually get tired of being in charge with setting up the dates they go on, handling all sorts of family and household matters, their finances, the sex they have, how much time they need to spend together, setting their goals for their careers, etc. Eventually, these women will lose all respect for their man, and more than likely cheat on or leave him for another man who hopefully can be a real man for her. Now, you may say that alpha males are not sexy, but when you come across a man who is one, then you will be turned on by him inevitably. You may feel somewhat uncomfortable with the raw masculinity he exudes even if you see him and you may not even like him at all in any sort of way from the get-go. Nevertheless, the fact is that when you are in the presence of a man's man, provided that he interacts with you as respectful gentleman, you will undoubtedly be so extremely influenced by him to at least give him a great amount of respect. This is because you see that he without a doubt stands out from the rest of the men as a man who is strong, brave, confident, centered, rational, decisive like a leader, has some level of charisma, street smart, is respected by other men, is on his life purpose, can protect her on some level, etc. Now, I am not trying to say that I like or even respect those "bad boys" who are completely abusive assholes or manipulative, conniving douchebags. I see these guys as the scum of the earth with no honor and no respect or real love for women, let alone for themselves deep down. I am talking about good men who have a backbone and genuinely respect and love women completely 100%, but at the same time are very masculine. These guys are like the true male heroes of dating, sex, and romance. While they are alpha males they also have a benevolent character overall. Now I will say that the "bad boys" who are good with women are not as a common as the contemporary "nice guys" out there. Hell, the "good men" out there who are good with women are even less common then the "bad boys." Some say that the "good men" that exist are like 1 in a million. This in fact makes the men who worked very hard to achieve such a rare status inevitably stand out as like the top 1-3% men for women. However, we need A LOT MORE MEN to strive to become like the real heroes of dating.

Hey man, glad you came on here. What everyone is saying here is definitely good legit advice. Btw, Ross is actually my real first name. Anyways, there are some things that I want to add here. There are a number of factors that we need to consider regarding why looks alone will rarely ever be enough for guy to pull the girls he wants. Let's dive into this. One reason for this is that naturally most women DO NOT ever make the first move on a guy, let alone take the lead in any interaction with a guy they are interested in due to the fact that the great majority of them are too afraid of getting rejected just like the great majority of men get too nervous approach the hot girls. The second reason, is that even though the feminist movement has greatly influenced women in general to be more strong, independent, assertive, and in some ways act more masculine, in virtually all areas of their lives, this has actually not been the case when it comes to dating, sex, and romance. There have been more women these days that have taken it upon themselves to go up to the guy, talk to him, ask for his number, ask for a date, etc. However, again, most women are too afraid to be that forward with a guy. This has been one of things that has been lagging with the whole feminism thing. Usually this is because A LOT of women are afraid of coming off as a sexually aggressive woman, because of the fear of being slut-shamed by others or society (even though, in most cases more men actually would really like it if she is very forward). This is true, regardless of where or how a girl meets you whether it be through your social circle of friends, from cold approach within any random environment, online dating, etc. So, having said all of this, most women naturally decide to leave it to the guy to be the man and take the initiative and lead with practically everything. This means that with most women (again, not always), you as the man are expected to be the one to approach the girl, start the conversation, ignite the sexual energy between you and her, lead the interaction, take control of the frame within an interaction along with what topics you discuss with women, sexually escalate with her, be the one to get her number, be the one to set up the date(s) (including time, place, and day), lead with calibration to you kissing her then making out with her and then to having sex with her, physically lead her to a certain place(s). Essentially, you are usually expected to be the leader with pretty much everything you do with and say to the girl no matter how good looking you are (even if you look like Brad Pitt, George, Idris Elba, Tyrese Gibson, Michael B. Jordan, Chris Hemsworth, Ashton Kutcher, Henry Cavill, etc.). Also, some women will feel too insecure or too intimidated to deal with a good looking guy because they are afraid of being played by them, despite them actually jumping the gun. The second reason for why just being a good-looking guy is not enough is that women are not as visual and logical as men are. Yes, they may think that a certain guy they see looks hot and may likely give him the chance to have a good start with her in the approach. However, if during the approach he says or does something that she thinks or feels sounded too awkward or weird then she will probably, if not for sure, end the convo either by excusing her self and walk away from him or will say in some sort of way that she wants to end the interaction with him because she's no longer interested in him. This is because biologically speaking, women's sexual attraction to men (assuming she is straight) is more based on their intuition and emotions than how visually and logically they find a certain a man attractive. Why do think that their still aren't as many women who watch porn as much as men do, especially when it comes to watching straight male dominated porn? Believe me, and I don't like to brag, but I've actually been told pretty much all of my life that I am an extremely good looking guy who should have been an actor or model, and yet I got rejected by hundreds of women I like. Most of women I like have and will always say no to me for a date and/or sex. Therefore, there feelings about a certain guy tend to be more fluid than a man's, which means that their emotions will tend to change more frequently than a man's. However, if you know how to inspire a woman to feel positive emotions and even more so get her on an emotional roller coaster that really engages her, then you will greatly influence her to be very attracted to you not just socially, but also sexually as well. This is why it is absolutely crucial for men to develop their personal charisma as much as possible. This means that it is immensely important for a man to improve his overall social skills as much as possible, including the ability to intelligently read and understand other people especially women's emotions and non-verbal cues, the ability to listen to people especially women well, the ability engage others verbally and physically on a very emotional level, the ability to emotionally connect well with others including women as much as they can, the coolness of the clothes and accessories they wear, how in style and congruent their haircut and facial hair (possibly beard or mustache) is, their personal hygiene, their wit and sense of humor, and possibly their ability to effectively organize and lead social circles and events, etc. Also, last, but not least is the fact that men HAVE GOT TO ACT MASCULINE/DOMINANT AND AUTHENTIC. Why do you think most women get turned on by the alpha males? Because not only do they act very confident, which in and of itself is very attractive trait (even for women to have), but also these very, if not hyper-masculine men project dominance and aggression around women (without being a creep or perv). WOMEN LOVE TO SUBMIT TO A MAN THEY AT ARE ATTRACTED TO (AT LEAST TO SOME DEGREE) WHO TAKES PRIDE IN BEING IN CHARGE OF HER. This is because submissiveness and passivity are more feminine traits and dominance and physical aggression are more masculine traits. Furthermore, they actually respect and get turned on by a man who physically sexually escalates on them all the way to kissing to making out to having sex. Even though a lot of women these days are taking pride in being a strong, independent women who seize the opportunity to strive for success, money, and power (including leadership roles), deep down when it comes to social and sexual matters practically all straight women want to be dominated by a man for the most part, even if she is married to him. Men of course involve their own intuition and emotions in deciding how attractive they find a certain woman to be, but during the beginning stages of dating guys decide how attractive a chick is primarily by her looks and tend to naturally deal with her on a more logical level. Btw, women in general are also actually more attracted to a man who has high status than a man with good looks even if he looks super hot. They also find men who looks fit and somewhat muscular (not to the size of a pro bodybuilder or powerlifter or strongman competitor) sexier than a pretty boy who looks scrawny. Though again, looks can only do so much to attract most women in general. So looking like a hot muscular dude will still only help you a bit.

Hey guys, it's been a while since I was last here on this forum. I have a burning question that I've lately been wanting to get answered. My question has to do with whether or not women often get approached constantly. I've been hearing from various dating experts including dating experts such as Locario, 33secrets, Mystery, etc. that women, especially the cute girls get approached all the time wherever they go because they are the ones who usually wait for the man to do the approach like tradition dictates and there are so many horny guys out there who are trying so hard to hit on practically any girl they think they can get either just to get sex or to desperately get a girlfriend. However, I've been hearing from a myriad of dating experts such as Hayley Quinn that most women don't get approached much if ever at all. In fact, she even did an social experiment vid where she stood out in the city of London for a long time, and even tried out various clothing styles to see which type of clothing styles would get her the most attention and attract the most amount of guys to approach and flirt with her. The results at the end of the experiment were that no guys really ever tried to hit on her at all, regardless of how sexy or stylish she looked. So, I am confused by this contradiction of information between the various the dating experts out there. Which or what do you think is actually the truth, guys?

So, I decided to write a personal diary of my own here, because I have absolutely no other place to vent my anger, fear, and other forms of "negative energy" without getting banned or alienating others. I don't expect anyone here to respond to me here, but I do ask that I don't get banned from here for complaining and dumping countless amounts of negativity on here. I've already been banned from a number of other sites for doing that and have been warned by some instagram users and people on multiple skype chatrooms that they will ban me if they see another word of whining or some other form of negativity from me. Also, my parents are tired of hearing me complain and it's not like I can have an unlimited amount of therapy sessions from my psychiatrist or psychology. Hotlines, aren't available either. I don't know where else to go. This world fucked up in so many ways and I am doing everything I can to live in it.

So, I hope this doesn't offend anyone, but I am getting tired of looking up porn and getting myself off privately. However, I have a high libido and am craving for sex. Yet, I can't find any girl through legal means to help me blow off some steam, if you know what I mean. Leo has mentioned before that you can't just meditate away and wait for it to pass, unless you are well over 40 years old and have had an ample amount of sexual/love experience with a girl (or girls) in your life. However, I don't want to pay for a hooker, because I don't want to risk getting into trouble with the law. Hell, I don't even have much money of my own and my helicopter mom tries to make sure that I don't just try to have sex with a random stranger. What am I supposed to do about this?

Everyday, I keep having the thoughts and feelings in my head over and over again that I will never become successful or achieve my dreams. I know that there are no guarantees in life, as much as it is a cliche. However, these nagging thoughts keep telling me that I may never get no matter how much work I put into it. Leo was indeed right when he told me that I have a victim mindset. I remember watching very thoroughly his Youtube vid where he talks about the stages including :being a victim, then becoming a fighter, then creator, and finally being peace. I am obviously still on the victim stage and here’s the crazy part about all of this. I am second degree black belt in a martial art and have been training in the art for almost 11 years. Plus I devoted over 4 years of my life to heavy weightlifting and bodybuilding. Also, I’ve been training for a half marathon for over 5 months now. I’ve been through so much training (not as much as a Marine soldier of course). Yet, I still feel and think like a victim. I am having trouble generalizing my developed willpower from all of the physical activity I’ve done over the past several years into all of my other areas of my life.

I see. So they may or not give you another chance after a certain amount of time has passed.

Guys, I’ve still keep getting rejected from time to time. I accept that that will always be a natural part of the game and dating realm. I know some people on here have said that you can always trying again in sometime in the future with that same girl, if u ever come across her again in person like a month or months down the line or what have you. Others on here, have disagreed with that. However, I am still not clear about all of this. I’ve lately been hearing from more dating coaches that it’s never a good idea to approach a girl or ask her out again, EVEN if you already conveyed your interest clearly to her months ago or a year(s) ago because she already made up her mind about you and she’s very unlikely to be convinced otherwise. Also, it may come across as strange and perhaps too needy. However, other dating gurus and some people on here have said the opposite, especially if you have positively changed a lot in your game and personality. Plus, women’s sexual/romantics are more fluid than women’s. I bring this whole thing up again because almost everyday I keep seeing hot but rare women who already turned me down in the past and I live in a small town. Yes, I know I need to move out, but I can’t and I really don’t have the enough time each day to go travel back and forth between my town and a major city just to hunt for beautiful women. Fuck, why can’t dating be much easier than it is?

Ok, So I am back with another burning question. So I've recently regained the confidence in being able to attract a relatively average looking and mediocre quality girl. I now know that it's practically guaranteed that I pull that off with someone out there who I find to be just a plain Jane to me. However, I still am having an extremely hard time trying to rebuild any hope or confidence that I will ever be able to really pull a HOT girl with a high quality personality into bed and/or make her my girlfriend or friends with benefits. Even with all of the knowledge I've gained and the virtually limitless opportunities I will be able to have in the future to meet a highly attractive girl and incalculable efforts I put into this, I feel like I don't know that I will still ever have a very good chance at finding a girl whom I am truly attracted to. How true is it that for some men like myself, no amount of practice, training, or coaching in approaching women and improvement in your overall lifestyle will ever grant them skill level needed to attract the HIGHEST QUALITY and/or HOTTEST WOMEN out there?

You may have a point@WildeChilde . Actually, I forgot to talk about on this thread the money and status parts mentioned by the Red Pill troll. The issue of whether or not women are attracted to money, has also been questioned many times incessantly. I know I am not one to totally cast blame on guys like the filmmaker of the RED PILL video because I have asked A LOT of questions that many people on this forum have deemed asinine by a number of people on this forum, including the moderators themselves. Also, I have felt very sexually frustrated for a long time just like those in the Red Pill and MGTOW communities. Yet, when it comes to money, I know that the question as to whether or not women care about a man's money has already been ask by countless guys who are so unnecessarily insecure about that. Yes, you need to come off as someone who makes a decent living and is a hard working responsible man if you want a serious long-term relationship. However, you don't need to be rich or even necessarily make 6 figures to attract hot women. Actually, if a woman goes out with you, sleeps with you, gets into an LTR with you, and even marries you because you're rich then it's probable that the only reason she wanted to be with you is because of that. In that case, you can count on her being a gold digger. Donald Trump married a gold digger and has probably slept with only money grubbing whores. Check this guy's sob story on how he deeply regretted marrying a gold digger who not only married him for his money, but also for a green card: Now when it comes to status, that might be a different story. Women are naturally more attracted to a man's overall status than his wealth or looks. If he is someone who has been known to have garnered a large amount of respect and recognition from others, then she will see him as a high ranking male or perhaps an alpha male within his community. Therefore, she will naturally deem him as a very high quality catch and someone whom she may even be proud to show off to all her friends and family because of who he is. Also, if you have high status as a man, then you will naturally project the aura of a dominant leader around others, which is a highly masculine trait. That in and of itself is very sexy to women, including the hottest babes in the world. As long as you stay confident and maintain your high level of status, then women will automatically become highly attracted to you. Furthermore, when you are very charismatic then your perceived level of status becomes high. This is very crucial when it comes to attracting women, especially during the beginning stages of dating and sex. Lastly, if you're a powerful man then so many of your physical and character flaws can be forgiven. Since the dawn of mankind power has always illustrated the difference between a loser and a winner, a weakling and a strong man, a slow one and a fast one, a person who gives up easily and one who always perseveres no matter what, an ignorant stupid fool and a highly educated and intelligent wise man, etc. Both men and women look down upon those who are the former and honor and respect those who are of the latter.

Wow. And they say that I love to "flog a dead horse" on almost any subject. Anyways, this red pill crap is truly becoming a complete farce. Aurum, Solr, and KVIL are absolutely right. Many legit dating coaches and PUA guys have already mentioned or implied COUNTLESS times that without any game, a man's good looks are meaningless to women. WildeChilde and Lorcan, quite frankly you are both sadly mistaken. The majority of women DO NOT care as much about a man's looks as men do over a woman's looks. Men are biologically much more visual than women are. Leo has even talked about this before a number of times in a few of his videos regarding attraction. I don't really feel comfortable with bragging about my looks, but I've always been considered extremely handsome ever since I was little (practically model material) and I will even argue that I've even become more aesthetically pleasing to both people in general and women as I've gotten increasingly ripped and more muscular over the years (without getting too hulking like a Pro bodybuilding juiced-up freak). Furthermore, while I am only 5'9", because of the particular bone structure I've been born with (long legs, long arms, broad shoulders, and naturally great posture), I've always given off the illusion that I am at least a couple of inches. Even though I've bulked myself up over the last 4 years of serious weight training, having put on about 20-25 lbs. of mostly pure muscle since I started back then committing myself to the whole regimen, I still look like I am about 5'11 to 6'1." I also sure that my overall posture has even further improved from the consistent proper weight training as well as the kind of cardio that I've been doing (including running, and martial arts), and flexibility training, over several years. Yet, I RARELY get any freebies for makeouts, dates, or sex solely because of my looks. If a man is good looking it will only mildly stimulation a lot of women sexually, will make a larger amount and a wider variety of different types of women see you as their physical type TO A DEGREE, give you more of an automatic opener (though not always) for starting convos with any women, and help with your perceived level of social status only a little bit. That's it. Watch this guy's video. This guy really know his stuff in practically every video he has made regarding women, attraction, and how to step up your game. If you haven't already taken a look at this whole thread, including what I stated myself on there, then please do so. Here's the link:

She’s a helicopter mom. She won’t let me go and cold approach because she thinks it’s too creepy and didn’t work for me.

I feel like no one wants to try and fix my social and dating problems hard enough. I still feel powerless. Sometimes, I wish my mother was dead in order to get out of the way of my dating and social life.

What if you feel very horny?

Btw, using music will only help you block out the pain so much. It's mostly up to your willpower, at least according to my experience.

If you have social and cold approach anxiety issues then read the following goodlookingloser articles in order: 1. https://www.goodlookingloser.com/anxiety/program-index/guys-that-should-not-start-approaching-women 2. https://www.goodlookingloser.com/anxiety/program-index/two-main-reasons-the-approach-anxiety-program-works-and-works-forever 3. https://www.goodlookingloser.com/anxiety/program-index/approach-anxiety-program-week-1-1 4. follow the next weeks AA drills until you completed the entire program to the letter. 5. https://www.goodlookingloser.com/how-to-go-out-alone-to-bars-part-1 6. https://www.goodlookingloser.com/entry/how-to-go-out-alone/how-to-go-out-alone-to-bars-part-2 Follow everything in each of those articles to the letter.

It may seem contradictory, but it’s not. Feminism is supposed to be about giving women equal rights for both men and women for jobs, money, and societal status. However, men should still slightly lead women when it comes to sex, dating, romance, family issues, and perhaps during combat or hunting. Otherwise, there should be no more slut shaming or any primitive notions of subduing women or abusing them in any manner. Watch the new Wonder Woman movie. It was one of the best superhero movies I’ve ever seen. Certainly better than the Batman vs. Superman one. Also, although I don’t usually condone old fashion ideas, I actually do agree with the way a lot of men from about the mid 1970s and anytime before where men were more masculine in the way they attracted women. Watch Rhett Butler in Gone with the Wind, Richard Burton in many of his movies, Marlin Brando in a Street Car Named Desire or some of his other movies. Watch any of the James Bond movies. Hell, even the latest versions of Bond still show him as an Alpha male. Others include all of the Bourne movies. Watch and identify anime characters that depict hyper masculine men such as in all of the Dragonball series, Naruto, Bleach, Street Fighter, King of Fighters, Cowboy Bebop, Big O, etc. Find the minority of guys in real life who are still very masculine and successful with women, if u can (I am still trying to find guys like that in real life who are available and interested in wanting to be hangout buddies with me).

I hope this doesn't offend anyone on this forum, but here it goes: Try masturbating in front of her and fingering her. I've had sex in my car a few times and almost had two more P in V sex there. Turn the air conditioner on and make sure your car is parked away in a place that makes it hard for people to see you (e.g. at the top of an empty level of a parking lot or during night time out on the street where hardly anyone is around outside). Some girls have said that I was crazy to do this, but I didn't care and in a way it turned me on even more, just like the time I got a good blowjob out on the park in public during the time I lost my V-card. Or like the other time when I got a handjob from another girl in the same park out during another night.

Shroomer, how do you know that you will be able to increase your perceived value tremendously?

Are you saying that I should only go for average or ugly girls?

Damn. I wish I could cum faster. I have delayed ejaculation. How thick are your loads, benny?

but I've watched that countless times. Is there anything else you could possibly give me for advice?

Ego can never be gotten rid of if you want to win or succeed in life. Even if you balance it out with humility, the ego will still drive you to succeed. You guys have got to stop talking about ridding the ego. It will never happen. In fact, the more you succeed at anything the more your pride grows, the more the ego grows inevitably. Just take a good look at the greatest people in history. Even Mahatma Gandhi and the Dalai Lama had huge egos. They just knew how to balance it well with humility, unlike Trump who never was capable of doing it. Don't even get me started with the pope.

Well, unfortunately I've been to therapists countless times all of my life and with many therapists. They all failed me. No matter what I try, I can't shake this victim mindset. It kills me everyday like a demon eating away at me everyday Everyday, I try to stay as strong as possible and move on from it. I wish I knew why I can't change it, no matter what I try.

Yeah I can't end the fapping. It's too much for me.